Frosted Butts

genuinely if it becomes a film making trend to adapt 4chan/reddit posts into movies i think we should ban the moving image

the position of the mischevious pig marks the hours

Betrayed and backstabbed by your scheming evil advisor? Psch. Skill issue. Absolute amateur problem. Just hire two of them and reward them for snitching on each other. Just make sure that neither of them is gay or they'll just end up hate-fucking each other and fucking you over all the same.

"hire two evil advisors but make sure neither of them is gay" are you hearing yourself right now. be serious

if the dragon's not purring and making cute little noises and squirming then you're not rubbing its belly the right way okay. do better

it's in your best interest as a creature with self-preservation instincts to figure out what you're doing wrong and fix it immediately.

a bored dragon is, in fact, a dangerous dragon, so you better keep its attention off of the fact that you're small and squishy and keep it on the pleasure of a belly rub.