Life According To Me

I’ve never been someone who has been good at expressing my feelings before, I tend to bottle them up until I explode. My feelings scare me, especially when they’re for another person. You make me nervous, so nervous that I lose my train of thought whenever I talk to you. Whenever you kiss me, or touch me, or even look at me it gives me butterflies. You can just look at me with your smile, and…

My feelings they scare me, I’m not normally a person who is good with expressing how I feel, especially when it’s about another person. He makes me nervous, so nervous that I lose my train of thought whenever I talk to him. Whenever he kisses me, or touches me, or even looks at me it gives me butterflies. He can just look at me with his smile, and make my heartbeat skip.

I really can’t explain…

Little Pieces Of Myself…

 I always doubt relationships, they scare me. I always just jump into them without thinking and once I’m in one I start to doubt it and overthink, then realize I don’t really like the person or I’m just not ready. I also think it’s because I’m afraid of being happy and that’s why I always go for people I know will hurt me so I don’t get my expectations too high. Being happy is the most terrifying…

Letting Go…

His absence tortures me. As the days go by, the reality stings me. Our separation felt no different from physically cutting my chest open and pulling out my heart. I lived without him before but it seems as if life is without meaning without his presence in my life. I always say I’m done with him, but I never am. I don’t want to let go, but holding on is weighing me down. The burden of loving…

Battling My Own Mind…

I’m tired of trying. I’m tired of crying. I know I’ve been smiling but the truth is inside I’m dying. Every day is a struggle. It’s a struggle to eat, to talk, to move. I don’t ever want to get out of bed, I just want to lay in it forever and just sleep. Each day it’s getting harder and harder to get up and leave my bed, it gets harder to fake a smile and pretend I’m alright, pretend I don’t want…

Wanted… (Rough Copy)

He called me beautiful. That’s all it took, that and maybe the fact he paid attention to me when no one else did. I thought I was in love, but really I was in love with the fact someone wanted me, I had never been wanted before by anybody, especially someone three-years-older than me. He used me and hurt me in so many different ways. He took something from me, broke something inside of me that I…

When I was a girl I lived in a very small town where everybody knew everything about everyone. Our town was a very religious town. We weren’t allowed to read certain books. We call them the banned books and if you read these books, well, you were ridiculed. I had no one. I was alone. I didn’t have any friends at all. I was the four-eyed freak who read the banned books from the library. In…

Jocelyn Masse: An Inventory of Being

I am Jocelyn. I am eighteen years old. Born the 24th of May 1998, I share a birthday with my mother. I am a daughter, a sister and a friend. I am a daughter, a sister and a friend. I am not alone. But why do I feel I must face the world by myself? If I stand straight I am 5’1. My eyes are brown, with a touch of green, so hazel. I have dirty blonde hair that’s very thin but lots of it. That never…

Broken & Bruised (Descriptive Piece on Abuse)

I’m broken and bruised. I’m black and blue all over: my arms, my legs, my face, everywhere – head to toe. A swollen eye that I cannot see out of. I have a fat lip that is swollen and cracked. My nose is broken with crusted blood around it. When trying to breathe all that I feel is sharp pains from broken ribs. My knuckles are round and cut from attempts to fight back. I have glass pierced into my…

I lay here in a puddle of my own sadness. I feel like I don’t belong, like I’m out of place, like I shouldn’t be here, like I shouldn’t exist. I feel unloved, unimportant and just worthless. At the same time I know I am loved and I am important but yet I still feel out of place. I can’t stop crying and I don’t know why. I feel so alone something just took over me, I can’t move I feel so weak. I…

To start off the reason why I’m writing this post is because my 17th birthday is coming up this week and I thought it would be a good idea to share some of the thing’s I have learned over the 17 years I’ve been alive. So here it goes…

1. People will promise to never leave you, They will. It’s okay to be sad when they do.

2. It is always okay to cry. Always. Find a bathroom, bury your face in your…

Letting Go…

Letting Go….

Letting Go…

His absence tortures me. As the days go by, the reality stings me. Our separation felt no different than physically cutting my chest open and pulling out my heart. I lived without him before but it seems as if life is without meaning without his presence in my life. I always say I’m done with him, but I never am. I don’t want to let go, but holding on is weighing me down. The burden of loving…

I don’t understand. I don’t understand why do all the bad things happen to good people? Why does this happen? I just don’t understand. My friend, she means the world to me, I honestly can’t imagine my life without her, its unbearable I don’t even want to think about it. My friend she is just an amazing person she is the kind of person you want to have in your life, she is the kindest most caring…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08DjMT-qR9g

Have you ever liked someone so much you would do anything for them; you would do anything to be with them, you would just keep trying to be with them even though you know that it probably won’t go anywhere. Do you know what it’s like to want to be with someone who doesn’t want you? I’ll tell you what it’s like it’s awful. Not knowing weather or not to…

I’m Just Tired…

I’m broken and bruised. I walk around with a knife in my chest. I can’t do this anymore, I can’t pretend that I’m happy when I’m not at all. I might seem like I’m happy but really I’m not; I haven’t been happy in a really long time. I’m tired of fighting, hurting, just feeling like I’m worthless. I’m tired of it all; I’m tired of people judging me, people who don’t even know who I am, people…

I’m on the edge; I’m so close to falling. The palm of my hands are getting sweaty, and my fingers are getting sore from holding on too tight. This is it. It’s happening again; I’m going to fall. I don’t want to fall because I know it’s going to hurt. I don’t want to get hurt again. I’m so scared that I can feel my heart pounding in my chest and butterflies are flying in my stomach. This is it. I…