D. virginiana cyanus

i just checked my status effects for the first time in a while how long have i been Doomed for

[walking up to a lesbian couple] So which one of you is the fuel and which one is the oxidizer?

i got a weed vape that's pink and it has three fucking tanks one with indica one with sativa and one with hybrid all with dumb as shit names like slimer and pink z and shit and you turn it on and it says "choose your player" with options to smoke the indica, the sativa, or the hybrid, or a combination of any two, or all three, at the same fucking time. no matter how short you rip it for you blow a fat cloud and the effect it has is like making you a little unsteady but weirdly totally clearheaded for the first two seconds of hitting it and then the third makes the room spin and makes you vomit everything inside you and then black out. there's a picture of an exploding head on the little display, right next to the blinker counter. you're supposed to hit a blinker on this thing.

when a woman puts her everything into an outfit and her face is shiny like a disco ball and she layered her fav perfume with oil and then her bf puts on some shorts and a shirt like u better put on a fucking pink wig and lace panties im so mad at you rn

Do you guys remember how mad this made everyone ❤️ remember how we used to run

in the future humans will have something called "sinus button " and pressing it will immediately drain your sinuses of all fluid so that it can be filled with other things like rocks, webs, paint, tar, freef (new fluid that will be so important in that time) and also dr papper

#hope #hopepunk #positivity #utopia #dreamworld

so cool how advanced the algorithm has become, it literally only takes like a decade or more of spying on all my internet activity and then it can expertly curate a selection of 15-20 youtube videos that i don't really want to watch, and then keep showing me those videos over and over again for a week so i can scroll past them again. the future is now

What a lovely little post you have here! *Drinks up its wordjuice to add it to my lexicon like some form of Vernacula*

*Sinks my teeth into your vocabillaries*

it's such bs that the whole guilt-ridden stoic self-sacrificing martyr thing doesn't work outside of fiction. repressing all your emotions and neglecting your physical wellbeing should make you god's most tragically beautiful morally unassailable little soldier of righteousness but all it does is give you bad skin and gastrointestinal problems