bulletproof

Observing and studying the motion was one thing, but transferring it into a dress was something else entirely. Fabric didn’t naturally curl like a wave breaking against the shore, lace didn’t gather like the clouds on a slightly overcast day, and thread din’t dance like the rays peeking through, promising sun as soon as the clouds burned off. But that was her job as a designer. She had to breathe sentience into the lifeless and make it desirable. 

Her teeth dug rivets into her sketching pencil as she erased a few lines that didn’t capture the mood that she was going for. It was one of her only days off from her internship, but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t still working. If she wanted to reach her dreams, Jenny knew that she had to spend every waking moment devoted to them. All work and no play would pay off in the future. She had already spent one night off, and she wasn’t sure she could risk anymore than that.

“Can you move about three feet to the left?” Jenny asked the shadow that had suddenly come over her without looking up, “There’s only so much light, and I can’t waste any of it,” she elaborated as she began redrawing the lines she had erased, adding a slight curve that hadn’t been there before. “I know it might not seem like it, but this is actually pretty important,” she added as if her entire future depended on that one design rather than the countless ones she had in that book as well as her portfolio that was nearly busting at the seams and had already granted her admittance into one of the best fashion design schools in the world, but she knew that that didn’t mean that she could become complacent. The second she let that happen was the second everything would surely come crashing down around her - again.

In all honesty, even Eric was concerned for Blair’s reaction to Jenny. He tried his best not to get caught up in that sort of drama, but Blair was one of his best friends, as close as family, and Jenny practically was family, so he felt like it was probably his duty to step in. Still, with everything that had been going on, Eric had not exactly lived up to any of his duties. He’d stayed in touch with Jenny while she’d been away, and he had even encouraged her to return if that was what she wanted, but he had mostly stayed on the sidelines, knowing that Blair’s verdict was usually final.

Still, he liked having Jenny by his side. She had a habit of getting caught up in the drama and losing herself to it, but she always seemed to find her way back to who she was. Eric had never really thought about it, but the stable household she grew up in probably had more to do with it than he cared to admit. 

When she spoke up, a look of confusion spread across Eric’s features as he looked at the girl at the end of bar, smiling politely when she waved at him. “Oh- no,” he replied as he looked at Jenny, a puff of air escaping his lips while he shook his head. “I mean, you know, she’s cute, but…” he trailed off, leaving the end of the sentence hanging in the air. But she wasn’t Kenzie.

“Besides, she’s with all her friends, it was probably just a prank or a bet,” he said as he motioned to the drink, now in front of Jenny. “But hey,” he continued, eager to switch topics, “never mind me, you made it!” he said with a smile, talking not just about the party but also her arrival at the Hamptons in general. Even though he’d picked her up from the Jitney bus stop, there was a part of him that had expected her to stay hidden within the confines of their beach house. Jenny’s showing up to SL East had shown that she was not about to let Blair dictate what she could or couldn’t do. That was a little nerve wracking for Eric, but he admired her all the more for it.

With every second that passed by, Jenny’s heart beat a little heavier in her chest. She knew that she was chancing everything by showing up to the party, and that there was only so long she could last there before she was spotted by the wrong people, but she had never been one to just take a punishment lying down, especially not when it got in the way of something she wanted. And, in this case. what she wanted was a successful internship and to go to Parsons in the fall. And both things required her presence in the Hamptons, despite how angry she knew it would make certain people. 

Perhaps she was a glutton for punishment, or Waverly Academy just hadn’t had the right type of drama for her taste, but she was almost looking forward to being exposed. As terrified as she was for the potential consequences, she also knew that it was the only way she’d ever make progress in her life. 

She had almost skipped the party in order to avoid any potential fall out, but something told her to go anyways. That was where her friends were, and just because she had been banished didn’t make her a pariah among certain people, and that gave her the courage to show her face despite everything.

Rolling her eyes, Jenny shook her head, “But what?” she asked, though she didn’t really need an answer to fill in the blanks. “I’m not telling you to go propose to her, but you could at least flirt a little. Work that van der Woodsen charm,” she told him, grabbing the drink that he’d put in front of her. “It’s not a prank or a joke. You think she’s cute, she thinks you’re cute,” she said, nudging his shoulder. “Plus, it might make some people jealous,” she added, hoping it would prod him enough to at least attempt to move on with someone else. “Yeah, and you’re the one who picked me up,” she pointed out as he tried to change the subject on her, “Now take those skills and go pick her up,” she said, pointing to the aforementioned girl at the end of the bar. “At least introduce yourself, anyways. Or do you need me to play wingman for you?”

“I’m friends with everyone, didn’t you know?” Theo asked back with a little chuckle, nodding to the bartender for the next glass of whiskey placed in front of him as well as the gin martini that he placed in front of the lady. “Scott and I just get along, there doesn’t always have to be an ulterior motive to a relationship,” he cracked, sipping at his drink and fixing his eyes on the girl next to him. Not entirely true of course, but he wasn’t planning on throwing Rosson under the tires of his Maserati once he was done with him, so the farce could stand. 

“You’re a brave one, Jenny Humphrey. Or masochistic, I haven’t been able to decide which, which makes you interesting.  So… friends. Regardless of your Humphrey blood; I’m not that much of a monster, you know. ” Theo didn’t know a single person who had been burned by the Upper East Side as much as the youngest Humphrey. And yet here she was, yet again, sure to run into the woman that had a hand in nearly every one of her downfalls. Did he care? Not particularly, but the view of the next debacle would be better from up close. Or she made it after Blair went on to rule Monaco, leaving the seat open for the next girl. It was highly unlikely… but he’d seen stranger things happen in New York. 

“I suppose the real question here is simple: do you plan on staying interesting this summer?”

“And here I thought I was special,” she said, shaking her head, voice filled with faux disappointment that Theo had decided that he was friends with everyone. It wasn’t that she knew him well enough to debunk what she assumed was fake sentiment, but she what she did know was that the majority of the people who had gone to Constance or St. Jude’s didn’t have the warmest and most welcoming of arms for anyone who needed to cross a bridge to enter the city. “You’re an Upper East Sider, everything has an ulterior motive,” she countered, having dealt with her fair share to prove what was in her words.

“Or maybe I’m just reckless,” she offered, remembering the word being thrown around a bit in her youth. And though it annoyed her, looking back she supposed that she couldn’t complain too much, considering how well the word fit her. She had gone from homeless runaway to Upper East Side queen in less than a year, and that took a certain amount of tireless abandon. Not to mention the fact that she was back despite Blair’s threats, though that had more to do with opportunity than anything else. “Forgive my skepticism, but most monsters don’t admit to being one,” she told him, bringing the martini glass to burgundy lips. She had no true reason to not trust him, aside from her laundry list of scandals caused by those born with a silver spoon in their mouths. It didn’t make for the most trusting person.

Theo leaned back against the bar, sipping at the dark liquor in his glass. While he usually preferred clear alcohol, vodkas and light rums, the Upper East Side had given him a proper education in scotch and sometimes it was good to go back to your roots. And that’s exactly where he was, wasn’t it? The flash of a golden blonde head, clusters of diamond encrusted girls already whispering and rakish man-children smoking cigars like Gatsby caricatures… oh yes, he was home.

Anticipation crawled down his spine – or that could’ve been the flask that he’d downed prior to arriving at SL East. You didn’t just show up to a welcome bash sober – and he shifted, scanning the crowds of gathering people. Princeton had been just fine, good, even.  Princeton had just enough distraction to keep him from crawling out of his skin while still managing not to flush his life or his grades. It’s was middling effort on his part, but all work and no play made Jack a dull boy after all. Now though, it was time to play.

Finishing off his glass with a tilt of his head, Theo flagged down the bartender, motioning for another and then pointing to the well-dressed body next to him. “And whatever my friend here wants. We’re here to start the summer off right and that means copious amounts of alcohol! As a matter of fact, just leave the bottle, I’m sure it’ll find its way into appreciative hands.”

She ducked in and out of the crowded dance floors in an attempt to avoid too many prying eyes from exposing her whereabouts. While she was sure that it wouldn’t be long before someone sent in a spotted message to the infamous blogger, blowing her cover, she hoped to gain a bit more time to prepare what she was going to say before a certain Queen B tried to inevitably kick her out. She had almost avoided the party altogether, and if she had been smarter, that’s exactly what she would have done. But there was something about it that felt absolutely unavoidable. She was a recovering addict who craved Upper East Side drama in her veins.

As her eyes darted back and forth across the club, Jenny managed to make her way over to the bar. Perhaps it would leave her more exposed than she wanted, but she knew that attempting to get through the night where half the club hated her wasn’t something that she could do totally sober. And, for now, the coast seemed clear enough to chance, even if only for a few moments in order to finally relax and ease the Blair-sized paranoia that sat on her shoulders.

Her cheeks were glowing, the warmth of room settling in the rosy hues of her face. It barely brought any excitement, the arrival of summer. She’d spent the remaining months of spring pondering over her life, her purpose and she was no further forward in her discovery. It made her feel lack lustre, to be so out of touch with the world. Despite the glimmering chandeliers above, which her mother would have critiqued for dust, a dullness settled inside of her. She’d considered having a few more beverages, in hopes of livening the mood - but she didn’t want to make a complete fool of herself. Perhaps if Georgina were around, Alessia might have been urged on more, but instead she felt a false smile pressing into her features. 

Wanting to shake herself from the figurative slump that she found herself in, Alessia walked forward into the throng of people in hopes of finding recognisable bodies. She heard harsh whispers, a couple on the rocks. It was what she was good at, listening to the problems of others ( and avoiding her own ). 

Curling her mouth up, she smirked slightly. “Seems like there are already fall-outs and the party has just begun.” It was spoken to no one in particular, Alessia expecting her words to fall into the buzz of others talking and be unheard, but then she did not notice the other person nearby. 

She shouldn’t have been there, and she knew that. Though her banishment had been from Manhattan, it was pretty obvious of the unstated ‘and anywhere Blair Waldorf might happen to be.’ But she had been invited, just like everyone else who was there. And though she risked more by being there, she couldn’t find it in herself to not go to the party. Sure there had been different bashes and soirees at Waverly Academy, but none of them could ever add up to the decadence that came from old UES money. It was everything that she had wanted when she was fourteen, and now her step-mother’s name gave her unlimited access to all of it, and it was hard to deny her early teenage desires, even when they had gotten her into trouble countless times.

Showing up was a burn victim playing with fire. She didn’t know for sure where most people stood, but she could only assume that the majority would side with Blair. After all, she was the one who had the power to administer banishments to begin with. But, if Jenny ever wanted a chance to be a part of the world she had once craved, then jumping in head first was her only choice.

She had managed hide herself amongst the throng of people, not sure of the best way to make her presence be known when she heard a voice cut through the chatter of everyone else, including a couple that seemed to be fighting. “It wouldn’t be a party without at least one,” she said with a shrug, “In fact, I know it just started, but I’m surprised that that is the worst of it, so far.”

Even though he could technically drink without breaking his sobriety, Eric was fully aware that it was frowned upon by nearly all medical professionals. Still, rum & coke without the rum was significantly less interesting than the real deal. He took another sip but then set the glass down on the bar with an annoyed sigh, the fact that he was ‘encouraged to stay sober’ just another constant reminder of his past. Especially these days, staying away from alcohol (and other temptations) had proven difficult.

It was still fairly early, but slowly the club started filling, and as the minutes passed it started to feel more like he was back in New York with familiar faces appearing around him, dressed to the nines and surrounded by that particular party vibe that almost felt like second nature. Eric knew he looked pathetic, standing alone at the bar with nothing but a non-alcoholic drink to occupy his time, but the only reason he was even here was out of sheer tradition: ever since he was sixteen he’d spent his first night at the Hamptons to celebrate. 

He kept his gaze on his glass until the barman put down another glass on the counter, pointing to a girl at the end of the bar, giggling with some friends while Eric looked at her. Yeah, not tonight, he thought as he scratched his temple and shook his head. “Oh, no thanks.” he said to the barman, speaking just loud enough to overpower the music blasting throughout the club, “I’m still good, thanks. You can pass it along,” he continued as he carelessly swatted his hand sideways to signal that whoever was next to him should get the drink. It was true, the Summer Nights party was a tradition he’d never miss, but this year he felt more like powering through it than celebrating the end of another school year. 

She shouldn’t have been there. Everything in her body told her to leave, told her to escape before she once again caught up in the whirlwind of the Upper East Side. She had only barely made it out alive last time, and she felt that if she didn’t play her cards right, she wouldn’t be so lucky a second time. She hadn’t been granted a second chance, but she was forcing herself into one by showing up. The only problem was that most people weren’t quite ready to forgive her previous transgressions.

Still, her curiosity had gotten the better of her. The magnetic pull of the party, the invite addressed directly to her, the chance to don a gown that was worth more than a three month’s rent in the Williamsburg loft she grew up in, it all called to her. If asked, she would have sworn that the opening of SL East had actually said her name as her car pulled to the curb. It had been far too long since she had been to a party with this particular crowd, and she could feel the judgmental following her as if to ask what she was doing there. she had been banished, and everyone knew it.

Trying to ignore the voice that told her that it wasn’t too late to turn back, Jenny made her way to the bar. There was no way she’d be able to make it through the night entirely sober. She ordered her drink before the familiar voice beside her caught her attention, and she was happy to see friend, not foe. “You should go for it,” she said, leaning on the bar to get a good look at the girls who had sent Eric a drink. “She’s cute and it’s Summer. What do you have to lose?”

🔎 - Random detail about them

💀 - What are they afraid of?🍰 - Do they eat healthy or do they like junk food?

Jenny definitely loves junk food. Though she tries to eat somewhat healthy, she oftentimes finds herself reaching for something more comforting. And she can never say no to Rufus’s waffles.

🏠 - What does their living space look like?

It has been a while since Jenny has had a space that is truly her own. At Waverly Academy, she lived in a dorm with two other girls and before that she lived in Serena’s old room in the van der Woodsen penthouse. And, even now in the Hamptons she is staying at the home that her step-mother owns, so it’s still not truly her space, and it’s temporary so turning it into her space wouldn’t quite work. And once she moves back to the city, she’ll once again have the dorm life and only have so much creative freedom with what she does with it. However, one thing that Jenny has had in every single room she’s ever occupied is her sewing machine, and with it its accessories and fabrics. Though she feels like at this point she doesn’t have a true home, her sewing machine is what reminds her that that space is hers, even if it’s only temporary.

🎹 - Do they play any instruments?

Though Rufus tried to teach her how to play guitar - he really wanted at least one child who shared his talent and passion for music - she never really felt a connection with it, and quit after just a few of his lessons. However, she can sing. She’s not passionate about it and would never do much with it, but she was in choir at Constance-Billard, and she tends to sing in the shower.

💤 - Do they like sleeping in or waking up early?

Jenny is definitely an early riser. It started when she was 14 and had to wake up early for her long commute into the city for school, and it is something that has stayed with her. She likes to consider herself a pretty productive person, and she feels that sleeping in would waste a lot of her time that could be used to do something towards her future.

💢 - Something other’s do that gets on their nerves

Underestimate her. Because she’s from across the bridge, she has had to deal with constant criticism and people believing that she’s lesser than just because of her zip code. And with their assumptions, people tend to assume that she’s not talented or worth anything and that she’s just a social climbing wannabe. And she can’t stand that people think that about her, and she feels a strong need to prove them all wrong.

💀 - What are they afraid of?

21. What kind of relationships do they tend to intentionally seek out versus actually cultivate? What kind of social contact do they prefer, and why?

answered.

22. How do people respond to them, and why might these responses differ?

People’s initial response to Jenny tends to differ depending on where exactly they are from. People who were born and raised on the UES tend to look at Jenny as a social climbing wannabe who puts herself before others. However, many of them also tend to be somewhat impressed with how far Jenny has come despite the fact that she’s from Brooklyn, though they would never actually say so. Her family, on the other hand, tends to view her as a lost girl. They see her as someone who got too wrapped up in the toxicity of the UES that it strangled and broke her. 

23. How do they respond to difficult social moments? What makes them consider a social situation difficult?

From having her first boyfriend outed at a party that she was throwing to her debutante date ditching her last minute, Jenny has certainly had her fair share of difficult social moments. But she never lets them keep her down. Every time something unexpected is thrown her way, she finds a way to redirect it into a positive for her. She’ll be knocked for a moment, but she uses her carefully crafted connections to rise back to the top. Sometimes it takes her a considerable amount of time to climb back up, but one thing you can count on is that she will.

She would define a difficult social situation as one that catches her off guard and takes her power and control away. 

24. How do they present themselves socially? What distinguishes their “persona” from their “true self”, and what causes that difference?

Socially, Jenny presents herself as someone with more power and importance than what she actually has. It’s similar to the old adage dress for the job you want. Jenny dresses her persona as someone who fits in naturally on the UES and someone who should be accepted regardless of her transgressions. She wants people to look at her like she belongs, and so that’s what she tries to exude when she’s in public.

And this persona is quite different from her true self. When she is not surrounded by the cattiness of Gossip Girl and rich kids that she doesn’t quite fit in with, Jenny is actually a pretty good person. When she doesn’t feel that pressure to be someone of importance, she can actually let loose and have fun without fear of consequence. For instance, she loves playing board games with her family, but that’s not something that she would want broadcast to the world since it’s not a pastime that the elite would likely participate in. And the difference is caused by pressure, stress, and ambition. When she was forced to go to a school that she didn’t have the money to be in without a scholarship, she was pretty much set up for failure. Her dad just wanted for her to focus on her academics so that she could get into a good college, but Jenny, being a teenage girl, wanted to fit in with who she believed were the cool kids. That pressure to fit in and the stress of what life was like when she didn’t fit in caused her to develop a totally new persona around certain people. In addition, she knows that she can use the connections that she makes in her future, so her ambition also forces her to change who she is in order to impress people who may help her later on down the line.

25. What do they need and want out of relationships, and how do they go about getting it?

Currently, Jenny is certainly not looking for any sort of romantic relationship. Back when Blair first gave Jenny her crown, she told her about how Queen Elizabeth was successful because she didn’t let a man bring her down. It took Jenny a long time to really understand the significance of that statement, but it’s one that she tries to remember. She needs to worry about herself and her future for now, and anything else can wait. However, when she is looking for a romantic relationship, she tends to try to manipulate her way into where she wants to be. Like when she decided for the second time that she wanted to be with Nate, she worked hard to try to show that Serena was a bad girlfriend, and convince him that she would be the better choice. Though it didn’t work, she did end up planting a seed of doubt in Nate’s head. She just ended up being banished before she could see it into fruition. 

When talking about platonic relationships, Jenny’s wants and needs are very different. She wants people who will listen to her and treat her as a queen. She wants for people to both fear and respect her. She doesn’t necessarily want a lot of close friends, she just wants minions. But her needs are quite different. She needs people who will ground her and make her do reality checks. She needs friends who want to be around her because they enjoy her presence, not because they want to be a part of the social hierarchy. She still needs people who will listen to her, but not in a demanding way, but in a way where she can talk about herself and her fears without feeling that every word might be used against her later.

26. How do they view and feel about relationships, and how might this manifest in how they handle them, if it does?

When seeking out friendships, Jenny looks for people who have power, people who have something that she can benefit from. She’s never just wanted handouts, but she does try to surround herself with people who will be beneficial to her social status, and people who challenge her. For Jenny, standing still is not an option. Everything she does is calculated and every person is in her life for a reason. However, the friendships that she cultivates naturally have always been with people that she can easily talk to. They tend to be slightly less intimidating than the ones she seeks out, and they are people that she meshes with without having to force it. However, she considers these friendships to be less important since the people that they are with aren’t always the ones at the top of the social hierarchy. 

“No, I couldn’t just give it up. I know that I’ve hurt Blair, but this internship is everything to me, and I’ve worked so hard for it. This is something that I need to do, I’ve earned it and it’s going to make everything so much better for me. I’m getting my life on track, and I can’t let it get off again just because Blair doesn’t want me around.”