i'm here to fuck around and not pay attention to oracles. we can find out my true identity only if we pay attention to @deviltownresident
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if i look back, i am lost
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Not today Justin
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oozey mess
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@jasonofthepalatine
i'm here to fuck around and not pay attention to oracles. we can find out my true identity only if we pay attention to @deviltownresident

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(getting off a 20 year boat ride) can't wait to see my fuckin pig farmer
I actually haven't been able to stop thinking about this article all day. I'm jittery. Emily Wilson destroyed Christopher Nolan. She basically said "it was nice of him to renew interest in the Odyssey even if he didn't understand the Odyssey at all and did a bad job at it." I feel so vindicated. I'm gonna ride this high for weeks.
Wilson, whose work on Homer’s epic was praised by Nolan, said his film was grandiose and superficial with ‘nothing convincing to say’
Also, separately, I have to include this quote that is not in the Guardian article. It was an in an article from The Times where Emily Wilson was interviewed, but it's behind a paywall so I'm putting a screenshot/alt text instead of just the link. Emily Wilson is such an icon for saying this.
"[Emily Wilson] does, however have views on the women of The Odyssey. 'By Nolan standards this was great for women characters. By Homer standards it was a bit disappointing.'"
QUEEN SHIT POP OFF
@spineless-lobster
>‘this thing is too generic and tropey’
>look inside
>forefather of that genre
if an archaeologist says an artifact was probably for “ritual purposes” it means “i have no fuckin clue”
but if they say it was for “fertility rituals” they mean “i know exactly what it was for but i dont want to say ‘ancient dildo’”
Back in the day I worked at a certain very famous and very high caste art museum in the US as a junior curator. Part of my job was to catalog the objects in the museum database. This includes details like provenance, measurements, and a visual description of what the object looked like.
Like I said, the museum was a pretty snotty institution. It’s got a LOT of objects it’s way famous for possessing, but nobody knew about the absolutely massive collection of Moche erotic pottery it had because the curators were totally embarrassed by this stuff.
Some examples:
Pretty hot shit, right? They never, ever put any of this stuff on public view or published it in any catalogues but - we legit had like several hundred pieces of Moche ceramics in the “dirty pots” category. Anyway, I was left alone to just do my job with regard to the database for several years, ok? And I figured, well, these’re accessioned objects in the museum’s collection - better get down to bidness.
I catalogued every goddamn bestiality, necrophiliac, cocksucking, buttfucking, detached penis, and giant vulva drinking cup in that collection. I’d be like,
A drinking vessel in form of a standing man wearing a tunic and cap. He holds an oversized erection in his hands and stares into the distance (note I did not say “like he’s hella-constipated”). The vessel has a hole at both the tip of the penis as well as around the rim of the figure’s head, thus forcing the drinker to drink only from the penis or risk spilling wine all over themselves from the top of the vessel. Red and orange slip covers the surface of the piece.
Pretty straightforward, right? Apparently the deep seated fear of these objects that the curators exhibited was meant to spread to me as well, but - no one ever gave me that memo, because I guess Midwesterners reproduce asexually. When the curators understood that I had catalogued all of these objects in addition to the other, non-sexy pieces in the collection, they were apparently livid, but knew they had no legs to stand on in terms of getting pissed at me for it.
I visited the museum’s online public access database a few years back and - every single description I wrote of these pieces has been totally neutered to say something like Male figural vase.
Long story short? Just call a dildo a fucking dildo. It’s all gonna be ok, I swear.
This is absolutely the MOST unusual reblog I have ever tagged with what is probably my second-favorite tag, “talk to me about your work.”
Plus it’s hilarious.
I love ancient art history !!!!!
@lowercasetrashwriter
Museums should have sections dedicated to artifacts like these with a warning that says “There’s a lot of private parts in here but we’re dedicated to displaying history so we won’t censor these. Enter at your own risk” or something. It’s prudish to deliberately hide history because of some ding dongs.
Fucking Puritanism.
Unpopular opinion: Sex exists. Making body parts taboo is both psychologically bad for us and kinda stupid.

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You ever hear that old chestnut about how most people neglect the part of the story of Icarus where he also had to avoid flying too low, lest the spray of the sea soak his feathers and cause him to fall and drown? You ever think about how different the world would be if Icarus died that way instead? If the idiom was to Fly To Close To The Sea? A warning against playing it far too safe, about not stretching your wings and soaring properly? You ever think about how Icarus died because he was happy?
Was feeling Emotions than was quickly hit by very different ones upon opening the comments
Elliot Page does not play Achilles in The Odyssey like transphobes were preemptively angry about but Homer just told me he updated the Iliad and Achilles is canonically transgender now and not just subtextually transgender like in the first draft.
the mutuals are getting mythological about the trials of modern life tonight on tumblr dot com
@ariaste
So cool.
mystery of ovid sex monday

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nip over to troy, bit of rough and tumble, big horse, bish bash bosh, back home to ithaca. simple as
i just think it's neat that odysseus gets put in a position where he has to kill his child to avoid going to war and he can't do it and then agamemnon gets put in a position where he has to kill his child to go to war and he does it
people's tags on this are so frustrating. yes i know both of them kill other people's young children and do many other war crimes as well. i could not be less interested in comparing their relative merits as human beings and deciding why one of them is worse or less sympathetic than the other. i'm just interested in kinslaying here because i think it's cool.
#everyone tagging this some variant of 'thats why agamemnon sucks' or 'low bar for odysseus'#you misunderstand. i think kinslaying is good and cool and characters should do more of it.
this might just be THE worst review oat 🥀
almost on par with this review of disney hercules which no longer exists on rotten tomatoes. for. fairly obvious reasons.
this might just be THE worst review oat 🥀
this might just be THE worst review oat 🥀
@cahokiajazz how it feels reading the aeneid in english
also i would LOVE to know what translation this guy used 😭😭

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stop letting miserable people on the internet convince you that you must have a concrete, well-constructed opinion on everything that has ever existed.
everybody say thank you Marcus Aurelius
Thank you Marcus Aurelius
@cahokiajazz