april

imagine being able to handle things. that’s wild.

One day, all little kids playing with toy cars and trucks won’t make engine noises when pushing them around.

Bring back the phase of society where having your tiddies all the way out was fine but showing ankle flesh was scandalous

i know this is aiming at 17. and 18. and 19. century fashion, but i really wanna bring back those dresses that only basically start under the boobs, like that little number Minoan snake goddess figurine is wearing

titties out, snakes up, she’s ready 2 go

I am forcibly removed from the historical narrative

shockingly enough turn signals exist for a reason

Posts that be like “If I were a monster that had to eat people, i would just eat horrible people~” are so absurd to me. How often do you see Known Criminals on the street? Billionaires out for a nightly stroll around town? Effectively fucking never. If I have to drag myself to the grocery store, you think it’s gonna be any easier for me to hunt Bezos and Co. every time my stomach growls? I can’t bother to plan meals more than a day in advance, how am i gonna perform whole ass detective work to confirm someone’s a serial killer before i eat them? Ya’ll got that much time on your hands? Planning 5 course meals every night of the week? Don’t make me laugh. Eat a pedestrian and tragically wrestle with guilt like the rest of us, idiot.

i am the kind of person who says hi to dogs

we need irl subtitles. what are you guys even saying

Wish there were sweaters but like,for feet

socks

make your own post

I’m at the doctor office and this baby keeps yelling “I want donow” (mcdonalds) and the big brother (I assume) said “all the mcdonalds burnt down, there’s no more mcdonalds”

Cats made of dark matter