2:38am

The reception hall was filled with tinsel, baubles, and buzzing wedding goers helping to set up for the rehearsal dinner. But you were looking for just one person. You finally spotted Jieun with her fiancé over by the empty drink tables. You gently grabbed her elbow as you walked up from behind her, “Jieun, hey.”

She spun around, a breathless smile coming to her face when she saw you. “Oh, Y/N, there you are. You remember my fiancé Minhyun.”

“Hey, good to see you,” he greeted you kindly. You had only met Minhyun at a couple work mixers—you liked him just fine, but you ostensibly hadn’t even known Jieun that long, so you were by no means close with her fiancé either. Honestly, the whirlwind of events that ended with you here at the ski resort that they had fully booked out for the occasion, all your expenses paid for, the day before New Year’s Eve, was still baffling to you.

“You too.” You nodded to him politely, then went back to your original mission, “Sooyoung told me to come get you, the makeup artist—”

“Minhyun, the chairs are all done!” Another man had approached the groom-to-be.

Minhyun clapped him on the back. “Perfect, thanks, Sungchan.”

An odd feeling pricked at the back of your mind, and you found yourself looking up at the tall man, entirely diverting your focus from your task. He was wearing most of a suit—notably missing the jacket and tie—and his shaggy, dark hair almost blended into his black dress shirt. You almost couldn’t place him, it had been quite a few years, his youthful features long gone, and you weren’t used to having to crane your neck to look up at him. Then the last piece fell into place: he moved away, to the very same city you just moved to. Of course he did.

“Jung Sungchan?” You still phrased it as a question, just in case.

“So that was you, Y/N,” he laughed and it sounded just like you remembered, and he immediately pulled you in for a quick hug. When you drew back, you were still holding each other by the arm, looking the other from head to toe in disbelief. He shook his head and chuckled, “Wow, you look the same.”

You smacked his arm lightheartedly. “Rude.”

“I didn’t mean it like—” Sungchan was cut off by another sudden giggle. “I meant even after all these years it’s still you.”

Jieun and Minhyun had been standing there watching the two of you silently, with matching bemused looks on their faces. Deciding to save your politely confused friends, you explained, “Sungchan and I went to school together for years when we were kids.”

“Then I moved up here,” Sungchan continued.

Jieun’s eyes widened, and she gasped in delight, “Oh my gosh! That’s so cute!”

“What are you doing here?” Sungchan asked you.

“Moved here a few months ago for work and now I’m a last-minute bridesmaid,” you gestured to Jieun at the end.

“Speaking of, I’m so sorry to cut your reunion short, but did you need me for something, Y/N?” Jieun asked you, the pained regret plain on her face.

“Right, yes, makeup artist.” You nodded hastily. Squeezing Sungchan’s forearm, you gave him a hurried goodbye as you started ushering Jieun away, “It was good to see you again, Sungchan. We’ll have to catch up later.”

“Totally, yeah…” Sungchan agreed, watching you go.

The wedding party were all milling around in the staging area outside of the hall where the actual rehearsal dinner was to be held when Sungchan found you again.

He sidled up next to you, suit jacket and tie on now, informing you, “We’re paired up.”

“Oh, good,” you breathed out a sigh of relief. “I feel a lot better doing this with someone I know.”

After a few too many beats of silence, you glanced up at Sungchan and realized he’d been staring down at you this whole time. You looked around awkwardly, “What? Is there something on my face?”

“No, you’re beautiful,” he reassured you. “I’m just… Wow, it’s been how long? Twelve years?”

“Sounds about right,” you confirmed. Skin prickling under his unwavering gaze, you looked around expectantly. “So what are we doing? The wedding planner explained it to me when I got here but I’ve gotten a lot of information in the past hour.”

“We’ll walk in third, just match my pace. Then when we get to the end, you go left, I’ll go right. Watch the other bridesmaids before you to see how fast to do it. Then you stand still while they say some stuff, then follow the other bridesmaids out. I’ll see you again back out here.”

“I think I can do that.”

“So how did you end up doing this?”

“I work with Jieun.”

“I meant why did you have to fill in at all?”

You looked around warily, eyes wide, and shook your head. Dropping your voice, you leaned in towards him to murmur, “Not here. Later.”

He nodded and quickly changed the subject, “So you work with Jieun?”

“Yeah, different departments but she set up my IT stuff on my first day and just never stopped coming by my desk. She’s been great. How do you know them?”

“Minhyun and I have been friends since college. Intramural soccer.”

“Oh, you still play?”

“I’m in an amateur league now. I coach at a youth league at the same complex too.”

“Really? What age?”

“Girls 6 and under this year. I’ve been with the same group since they were four, though.” He had a fond smile on his face as he held his hand at knee height palm-down. “My niece is one of my players.”

“Niece?!” You gawped. Sungchan’s little brother was two years your junior, which meant that if he had a daughter who was six…

Sungchan nodded his head with a resigned shrug, though he clearly seemed amused at your reaction. “Yeah, Bibi wasn’t planned. But Yoosung has really stepped up and done pretty good at the whole coparenting thing.”

“I can’t believe String Bean has a baby. I mean, in my head he’s still a baby!” You could only conjure up the image of the cute little boy who would attach himself to you whenever you went over to their house, which Sungchan always loudly complained about until their mother would finally intervene and get Yoosung to leave the two of you alone for an hour or two.

He fished out his phone to show you pictures of his family, particularly his brother and niece. “It’s been a while, Y/N. He’s grown up.”

“Oh my god…” You gasped, covering your mouth in shock upon seeing pictures of a young man who was definitely not your little String Bean anymore. “Aw, she looks just like him. Well, except her nose. She get that from her mom?”

“Yep.” Next was a group photo of the whole girls’ soccer team, Sungchan standing behind them with a huge, proud smile. “This was last year.”

“Look at that!” You zoomed in on Sungchan at the back, laughing as you took in the visor and whistle he was wearing, clipboard in his hand. “Got the clipboard and everything.”

“Hey, I didn’t get a ‘Best Coach Uncle’ mug for nothing.”

“Phones away, please!” The loud, annoyed voice of the wedding planner rang out through the staging area. Despite the general phrasing of her statement, her tone and eyes being laser-focused on Sungchan made it clear that it was for one specific person.

Sheepishly ducking his head, he turned his phone back off and tucked it away into his suit pocket again. You snickered and patted his chest. “Oops.”

“Ah, worth it.”

The doors to the reception area opened, and a hush fell over the wedding party. You squeezed Sungchan’s arm tighter nervously. He immediately flashed you a reassuring smile, patting your hand.

“It’s just practice,” he reminded you quietly. “I’ve got you.” The couples ahead of you began moving, and he nodded slightly, indicatively. “Let’s go,” he said, stepping forward as well.

You were pretty sure you blacked out until you saw the first pair ahead of you stop and split apart, taking their places on either end of the ‘aisle.’ Then, your attention was laser-focused on watching the second pair do the same thing, memorizing it because you were next. Stopping when Sungchan stopped, your nervous smile became genuine when he mouthed ‘see you soon’ before turning you around by the hand towards where the other two bridesmaids had lined up. You consciously controlled your pace to not run over to them while also not take too long, filing in third. While everyone’s gaze turned back to where the next couples were coming in, your eyes flitted over to the groomsmen, of course meeting Sungchan’s. He nodded just the tiniest bit, eyes blinking slowly, warmly.

By the time you were back in the staging area, your breathing had pretty much returned to normal. You were clustered up with the other bridesmaids, listening to them go over the details of the rehearsal again, when Sungchan found you as promised.

“Hey, good job.” He offered you a high-five.

You half-heartedly tapped your palm to his, still feeling a bit frazzled. “Thanks, Sungchan. Almost ate shit on my way out.”

“That wasn’t your fault!” Heejin, the bridesmaid who had been directly behind you when exiting, protested immediately. “The carpeting wasn’t stuck down properly there!”

“And it’s already fixed, so don’t sweat it,” Sooyoung, the maid-of-honor, reminded you from where she was straightening up stray pieces of hair for Heejin.

“Let’s eat!” Minhyun announced, ushering everyone into the main banquet hall.

The wedding party were all at one table, and after the obligatory speeches, the rest of the dinner was a casual affair of eating, drinking, dancing, and chatting. Once your plates and glasses were empty, you and Sungchan ended up on the edges of the dance floor.

“I don’t care for this at all, by the way.” You wagged your finger at him disapprovingly.

“What?” He chuckled and cocked his head in confusion.

“This whole ‘you being taller than me’ thing. It’s unnatural.”

He laughed and patted your head. “Oh, come on. We always knew it’d end up this way, you just hit your growth spurts first.”

“Don’t tell me String Bean is taller than me. I might just die.”

“I won’t tell you then.”

At the end of the night, Sungchan walked you back to your room (admittedly, his was just down the hall). Outside your door, he made a big show of glancing down one end of the hall, then the other conspiratorially. He stooped down to get closer to your height and dropped his voice to ask, “So, what happened?”

You lifted your chin up slightly, looking up at him in confusion, “Hm?”

“With the other bridesmaid that you’re replacing?”

“Oh, god, right,” you sighed, leaning back against your door. Sungchan followed you to not leave too much empty space, wedging his shoulder in between yours and the corner of the doorframe, rapt attention on you as you explained in a whisper, “She tried to make a pass at Minhyun right in front of Jieun.”

“Woah,” he breathed out, eyes comically wide. “Evil and stupid.”

“Stupid either way,” you scoffed. “Minhyun would’ve told Jieun even if she had tried it when Jieun wasn’t around. Just saved everyone time doing it in front of her.”

“Good point.”

“They’d already paid for her room and everything and it was too late to get a refund and there would’ve been odd numbers in the wedding party, so Jieun asked me to fill in.”

“I wasn’t paired up with her,” Sungchan hummed, the corners of his mouth curling up slightly. “The other bridesmaid. I asked your real partner to switch.”

“Well, thanks.” You patted his arm and let your hand linger there. “Like I said, I feel a lot better having you with me.”

“Do you want to eat breakfast together tomorrow?”

“I wish, but the bridal party are all doing brunch.”

“Of course, my bad.”

You arched an eyebrow. “Aren’t the groomsmen doing something with Minhyun?”

“Shit, yeah.” He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Completely forgot.”

“Mm, before tomorrow gets crazy and I forget, can I get your number?” You requested, fishing your phone out of your clutch. “Don’t want to lose you again after this.”

“Of course.”

As he recited it, you typed in the digits into a new contact, then snorted halfway through as an old contact name popped up. “Wow. I apparently have never cleaned out my contacts when transferring my stuff to new phones. I still have you in here.” You turned your screen around to show him.

“That’s a lot of hearts,” he teased, his eyes crinkling.

Looking back down at the name, you laughed lightly, “Yeah…”

“I won’t hold you up anymore, we’ll both need all the sleep we can get before tomorrow.” Sungchan pushed off your door.

“It was really good seeing you again, Channie.” You wrapped your arms around his neck, feeling the huge grin on your face as you did so. “Night.”

The years you had spent apart were even more apparent as Sungchan squeezed you tight with a strength he didn’t used to have, the firm planes of muscles that you could feel under his clothes and large, warm hands that rested on your back also new. He made a small, happy sound in the back of his throat, hugging you just a bit closer. “Night, Y/N.”

As you closed the door to your hotel room behind you, your cheeks hurt.

All of the bridesmaids were gathered in Jieun’s bridal suite for brunch, sprawled around the large canopy bed, plush couches, and armchairs in your fluffy hotel bathrobes. Jieun had specifically requested that the conversation stay away from the upcoming ceremony, or else she’d be too nervous to even eat.

“So, Y/N, I thought you said you didn’t know anybody here except Jieun,” Heejin nudged your knee with hers. She had been right next to you and Sungchan at the rehearsal dinner, it made sense that she might have noticed how well you got along for supposed strangers.

“That’s what I thought until I got here,” you chuckled, still a bit in disbelief. “Sungchan and I were friends when we were kids. We lost touch when he moved away.”

She grinned knowingly. “You were inseparable yesterday.”

“Oh, making up for lost time?” Sooyoung, the maid of honor, asked teasingly.

“I was paired up with him originally, you know? Then he asked if I would be okay switching so he could help you,” Ahrin gushed. She immediately went to reassure you and the rest of the circle, “I didn’t care, of course. He’s all yours, Y/N.”

Under all of their imploring gazes, you divulged, “Okay, so technically, he was my first boyfriend—”

“Knew it!” Heejin clapped victoriously.

“So cute!” Yeeun squealed.

“When we were like… twelve,” you clarified. “Literally all we did was hold hands for like, three months. Then he moved.”

“Aww!” “Oh my god!” “Cute!”

Jieun finally spoke up, leaning forward and pointing her fork at you. “And now you’re not twelve. So you can do a lot more than hold hands.”

You smiled down at your food. “Yeah…”

“Ooh, she’s thinking about it!” Sooyoung cheered.

“Do it!” “Get it!” “Hell yeah, girl!”

“Wait!” Heejin gasped and rounded on the bride. “He’s single, right, Jieun?”

“Like Ahrin said,” your friend grinned. “He’s all yours, Y/N.”

A knock on the bridal suite came ahead of the ceremony, and you rushed to go get it. That had been your assigned task for the afternoon—minding the door. Your hair and makeup was done first, and you were dressed first, so you were taking care of anybody who tried to come in while Jieun and the others got ready, sending away anybody unimportant, taking care of minor problems, or getting Sooyoung or the wedding planner to handle it. Keeping Jieun’s peace.

So far you had the photographer come in to take pictures of the bridal party getting ready, and someone from the wait staff come around with drinks. This time on the other side of the door was Sungchan, in his own groomsman suit looking quite put together.

“Oh, hey,” you greeted him quietly. “Everything okay with Minhyun?”

“Yeah, I uhm, I just wanted to see you,” he admitted brightly.

Looking over your shoulder into the suite, you saw the other bridesmaids occupied with getting their makeup done, putting the finishing touches on their hair, and chatting. Everything looked fine for now. You stepped into the hall with him, quietly closing the door behind you.

“You’re so beautiful.”

“Oh, thanks.” You looked down at the dress you were wearing. “The designer that made the other bridesmaids dresses from was nice enough to let me exchange when she found out I was filling in. Thankfully, they had this in the same color as the others…”

“It looks really good on you.”

You traced the edge of his lapel. “Suit looks weird on you, Channie.”

“Weird?”

“Yeah, it actually fits,” you teased.

“Oh, your aunt’s wedding?” He laughed. “My mom wanted me to be able to grow into that suit, and then I never wore it again.”

With a smile, you adjusted a piece of his hair. “You look great. I can’t wait to walk with you.”

“We’ll be the second-best looking couple out there,” he affirmed with a wink.

“Sungchan!” A man called his name from the end of the hall, and you spotted another one of the groomsmen speedwalking over to you two. “There you are, man. Come on, photographer’s starting with us.”

“Did you sneak away?” You snickered.

Sungchan started, “Well—”

“Yeah, got dressed in record time and disappeared,” the groomsman shook his head. “You look great, by the way, Y/N. He’ll see you later.”

He grabbed Sungchan’s arm and started taking him away. Sungchan waved to you, “See you soon!”

The music inside was bleeding out to the balcony where you had momentarily stepped out from the reception, Sungchan of course in tow. His suit jacket was draped across your shoulders to block out some of the crisp air, and you let out a content sigh as you looked out at the stars over the mountains.

“You’re beautiful,” Sungchan said dreamily into the quiet.

“I’ve lost count of how many times you’ve told me that, you know,” you informed him, words laced with fond amusement. “Which is kind of crazy, considering it’s barely been twenty-four hours.”

“You’re right, I should get a thesaurus. Hold on.” He took out his phone.

“Put that away,” you laughed, pushing his hand back down. He just turned around and held it up higher, making you try to reach around him to swat at the device again as he was fervently typing away. “Sungchan!”

“Fine, fine,” he relented, pocketing the device once more and leaning against the railing with you. “…Breathtaking.”

“Funny, I don’t remember you being this…” You trailed off, narrowing your eyes as you tried to come up with the right word.

“‘This…?’” Sungchan echoed, tilting his head and squinting his eyes to mimic you.

“Forward,” you finally decided. “When we were kids. I had to be the one to finally to tell you that I had a crush on you first, after like two years of us ignoring everyone telling us that we liked each other. And I mean, in hindsight, we were painfully obvious.”

“Y/N, come on, I’m not twelve anymore,” he chuckled breathily, picking up your hand and kissing your knuckles, then the inside of your wrist. “Have some faith in me that my flirting skills have grown up too.”

“Sorry,” you said sheepishly, squeezing his hand. “It’s just that some things are the same and some are totally different…”

“I know.” Sungchan brought your hand up to his chest, pressing your palm flat. His heartbeat was hammering away under your touch, and he giggled nervously. “This hasn’t changed. Still feel like I’m twelve sometimes, challenging the prettiest girl ever to a staring contest even though I always lost because I wanted any excuse to have your attention.”

“Want to see if you’ve gotten better at staring contests?” You suggested, stepping even closer to him. “Loser has to kiss the winner.”

“I’m not going easy on you this time,” he declared teasingly, squaring his shoulders.

“Close your eyes,” you announced, doing so yourself. “We start on three, okay?”

“Okay.”

“One, two, three!”

As soon as you opened your eyes, you saw Sungchan blink rapidly, and burst into laughter, covering your mouth with your hand to not sputter all over him. You laughed with your whole chest, the cold air devolving it into a coughing fit, and you gripped onto the railing for stability. Sungchan rubbed your back, even as he snickered a little.

When you’d finally caught your breath again, you looked back at him to see that he was grinning shamelessly. Still a little lightheaded from laughing so hard, you wrapped your arms around his waist, leaning your full weight against him.

“Seems like you haven’t gotten any better,” you chuckled. “I think you’ve gotten worse.”

“I tried my best,” he sighed dramatically.

“Well?” You looked up at him expectantly. “I’m waiting, loser.”

“Oh, sore winner,” he tutted, even as he tenderly cupped your cheek and traced your bottom lip with his thumb. “Impatient?”

“Yeah,” you snorted.

“Me too.” He tilted your chin up and kissed you. Sungchan tasted heartachingly familiar, a comfortable warmth spreading out from your chest to your fingertips that enticed you to just melt into him forever. You were unhurried, kissing him slowly and deeply, the cold air around you suddenly negligible. His mouth was equal parts gentle and ardent as it moved with yours, and his hand skimmed down your neck to rest on the nape, imparting more of his warmth in its wake.

Kissing him one, two more times, you broke apart with a fond smile on your face, murmuring, “We should get back inside before midnight. Jieun said they’re doing something special.”

“So are we,” Sungchan rebuffed jokingly, connecting your lips once more. After another moment of indulging each other, he relented, “Okay, let’s go.”

Lacing your fingers with his, you started back towards the entrance. The door opened then, and Sooyoung’s face lit up upon seeing the two of you.

“Oh, hey! Good, you two are already out here,” she said brightly, and more guests poured out after her. “The fireworks are about to start.”

“Perfect timing,” you grinned, nudging Sungchan.

Reclaiming your previous spot on the railing, Sungchan wrapped an arm around you, and you leaned your head on his shoulder. The fireworks were apparently supposed to start right at midnight, in just a few minutes, and the rest of the balcony quickly filled with wedding-goers.

“I still can’t believe I found you again,” he breathed out, pressing a kiss to your hair.

“I can,” you replied back simply. “I can believe it.”

“Yeah?”

“Because we’re soulmates. I’ve always thought that, haven’t you?”

“Oh my god, of course,” he giggled into your ear, kissing the side of your head again. “God, you don’t know how much I’ve been trying to not tell you I love you after only a day and you just… say what you’re thinking, as always.”

“It hasn’t only been a day, though.”

“You’re right.”

“I usually am.”

“I lo—” The rest of Sungchan’s words got drowned out by the crack of the first firework going off, and you were laughing as you pulled him in for a kiss. The booms and sizzles rang out around you as he happily kissed you back.

You watched the rest of the fireworks show, the bright bursts of color dancing across the inky night sky. After it was over, everyone cheered and toasted to the new happy couple once more.

“That was wonderful,” you commented to Sungchan, the two of you hanging back while the crowd slowly began filtering back inside.

“It was,” he agreed.

“I’m fucking freezing,” you announced, looking up at him with a smirk. “Want to go warm up?”

“My room’s pretty toasty.”

“Oh, you read my mind.”

A tiny sliver of sunlight streaming in through a gap was shining right across your eyelids. With a disgruntled noise, you rolled over away from it, burying your face in Sungchan’s chest. He automatically pressed a kiss to your hairline before resuming his faint snores. You smiled to yourself as you drifted back off to sleep.

You awoke again to gentle fingers brushing hair from your face, and blearily peeked one eye open to watch Sungchan fondly gazing down at you. “Morning, beautiful,” he whispered.

“Mm,” you hummed, closing your eyes again as you enjoyed the feeling of his fingers brushing through your hair. “Morning, Channie.”

“Breakfast?”

⇢ 2025 hallmark movie marathon

TAGLIST

@annenakamura @bee-the-loser @dejundesign @flooftown @httpsxnox @kirrakira @lotties-readings @pandabunbuns @ppddpjdr @reiofsuns2001 @snowyseungs @tearinka @yoursyuno @yutasputa69 @winkeuu @woozidreams

It was a whirlwind romance, like how he would describe it whenever you’d ask him. At thirteen, you and Donghyuck were finally catching up to the rest of your homeroom’s growing pains—both literally and figuratively. Your legs were longer now, albeit Donghyuck’s becoming longer than almost everyone else’s, and you were prettier than most. Letting your bangs grow was a wise decision in the summer, after all. Long gone were your chubby cheeks and you’d learned how to put on some lip tint before jumping on the bus to school. The internet was a better teacher when it comes to styling your hair; you’d never expected hairstyles come with face shapes. Meanwhile, Donghyuck, though his cheeks are still as round as they were in primary school, has learned that the hugs and kisses he used to give everyone in homeroom erupted butterflies all over.

You’d wondered, of course, because among everyone in class, Donghyuck’s probably given you the most hugs and kisses, yet you haven’t quite figured out what they meant when they say he gives people butterflies.

In the same year, Donghyuck learned consent. His mother and father gave him a lecture on why kissing people randomly isn’t ideal at his age and why consent is important. Hence, he’d stopped giving everyone random kisses. The last one he’d kissed you on the cheek was a week before summer started—not that you were keeping a record of all the stolen kisses—right when you were about to jump off the bus you and him were on.

Lee Naeun gave the first consent at thirteen. On the last day of classes.

She was moving to the US the next school year. Donghyuck made you wait by the benches as she packed up her duffel back after soccer practice.

She was taller than everyone else. Sporty and ambitious, Lee Naeun was every boy’s kryptonite. Just like how Lee Donghyuck was every girl’s.

“Can I kiss you?” Donghyuck asked. Naeun blushed like crazy. She was taller than Donghyuck, so when she’d nodded, Donghyuck had to go on his tip toes to reach her lips.

You looked away when Donghyuck got his first real kiss, wondering if the sudden pain in your stomach is the same as the butterflies that people get when Donghyuck kisses them.

kim haerin, August 2016 - January 2018

Kim Haerin was Donghyuck’s girlfriend all throughout junior high school.

Contrary to popular belief, Haerin pursued Donghyuck from the first week of classes. You and Donghyuck had moved to a different school after middle school as the one in your hometown didn’t focus much on arts, leaning towards STEM more, which, if you and Donghyuck were being honest, is the last thing you’d want to do in high school. This also meant that you and Donghyuck were new in town—the new girl and the new guy—and that people your age were particularly curious about you and Donghyuck that school year.

Oddly enough, the first thing they needed to confirm was whether you and him were dating. As soon as it was a clear no, you and Donghyuck received flowers left and right. You wondered whether this is what high school should be like and expected Donghyuck to feel the same, but that school year was different. The people liked the extroverted, friends with everybody Donghyuck, so it was easier for him to adjust to the new place and the new people.

They’d started dating the week after school started. Haerin was a part of a big group, the ones who’d studied in the school’s sister middle school down the road, and she knew everyone. She was nice, or so you’ve heard because you didn’t have that many conversations with her to confirm if she truly is, and she’d say hi to you when you passed by her by the lockers.

Donghyuck tried to take you with him whenever they’d hang out, of course, but his attempts could only do much because you weren’t into the same things as they were. Eventually, you’d found your own group and adjusted to the new school all by yourself. It made you worry about Donghyuck less whenever you’d see him all happy and loud like the person he is. While Donghyuck’s name stuck with Haerin’s all throughout high school, yours remain independent. You’d decided you’d start dating when you’re ready.

The only times you’d see each other, apart from the classes you shared, were weekends with your families. You and him talk, of course. Donghyuck at home is different from Donghyuck at school. But it was different. The memories of you and him going to and from school gradually blurred between all the people you’d met in high school.

Kim Haerin broke up with Donghyuck as soon as you all came back from Christmas break on the last year of junior high. She’d started dating the new guy from the other class who transferred all the way from Germany. She’d given Donghyuck a kiss in the middle of the empty gymnasium and told him she’d loved him but the sparks were gone.

Donghyuck waited with you on the bus stop that same day. To this day, he waits with you.

im jieun, November 2019 – December 2019

Im Jieun was one of a kind, and if you could pick, she was your favorite from Donghyuck’s long list of lovers.

She was a couple of years older than you and Donghyuck. How Donghyuck even got the slimmest chance of dating her, you have no idea. She was a freshman in college. You and Donghyuck met her at one of your seniors’ birthday party; they’d hit it off easily. They had the same personality, almost like twins, and were pretty much the perfect couple in your newly found friend group.

That year was the most life changing for him because Donghyuck lost his virginity with her, and for quite some time, similar to when he’d dated Kim Haerin, he disappeared from your life, and not that you’d cared at much at that time because you were also dating your first boyfriend, Na Jaemin.

Jaemin was everything a first boyfriend should be. Gentle and sweet, determined and future-driven, truly the kind you’d want your parents to meet. He’s been in the same class as you since junior high, but he wasn’t the kind to approach women that easily. He was brought up loyal and kind, and it showed with the way he treated you. He asked you out on a dinner for the first date, at an amusement park for the second, and a picnic by the park for the third—which was the same day he officially asked you as his girlfriend.

When Donghyuck had learned, he was as surprised as a best friend would be.

“You never told me you liked Jaemin,” he commented when you’d told him the news. He was sitting on the swivel gaming chair you and him bought as pairs right beside your bed, where you were still half asleep because he barged in at seven on a Sunday morning. Apparently, he learned it because he saw Jaemin’s Instagram story from your date with him last night.

“Because I didn’t,” you groggily replied. You squinted, trying to make up your mind whether Donghyuck’s a dream or not. “I mean, I like him now. But it didn’t occur to me until he started asking me out for dates.”

Donghyuck leaned his head against your chair, kicking his feet off the floor to spin himself around. “You never even told me you went out on dates.”

You giggled. “Are you sulking now, Donghyuck?”

He sighed. “I tell you all about the girls I date. Even the ones I dream on dating. And this one time you finally decided to start dating, I wasn’t there for you.”

You sat up, watching as your child-like best friend spins himself dizzy on your chair. “Check your phone. Every time Jaemin and I went out, I texted you.”

He sighed again, pressing his foot on your bedroom’s floor, stopping so he could look at you eye to eye. “You didn’t tell me it was a date. You said you were having dinner with him, going to the amusement with him, and hanging out with him at the park.”

“We’re 19,” you pointed out. “What would 19-year olds do alone together?”

Donghyuck tilted his head sideways. “You and I are always alone together.”

“It’s different.” You throw a pillow at Donghyuck, kicking off the blanket from your body and moving to give him some space to lay on. “Come here, you big baby.”

Donghyuck’s mouth formed into a pout but occupied the space on your bed anyway.

“I’m a big girl,” you reminded him as he rested his head on your chest. “I don’t need you to be there for me on my first relationship.”

“Ouch,” he mumbled.

“I will always need you in my life, Donghyuck,” you clarified, knowing well how Donghyuck hates being not needed. “Just, not for this one. I might actually, truly like Jaemin. He’s a good guy.”

Donghyuck hummed. “But I’m still your best friend, right?”

You laughed. Because it’s the most ridiculous thing you’d ever heard. Donghyuck will always be your best friend. You were certain no relationship would break that. You and him were past being insecure about your friendship.

“Always.”

Donghyuck broke up with Jieun before Christmas break. The reason, you have no idea. But he’d told you it wasn’t as fun as it was in the beginning anymore. And Jieun was in university, after all, and you and him had SATs to pass and college essays to ace before the school year ends.

You and Jaemin took him out for clubbing that night, in hopes of cheering him up. It was a mystery to you why he’d suddenly decided to end it when the relationship seemed like it was smooth-sailing. They’d even talk about Donghyuck going to the same university as Jieun next year. You didn’t recall any fights within the relationship, so you wonder why.

Donghyuck leaves the club without you and Jaemin.

lee naeun (again), February 2020 – April 2020

Donghyuck learned from Lee Jeno that his first love returned from the US to take her bachelor’s degree in Seoul on Valentine’s day. He found her wandering around SNU’s main lobby on the first day of the spring semester. You and Donghyuck were visiting the university after receiving your acceptance letters, looking for an apartment to share. Jaemin was going to another university, so it wasn’t wise for you and him to move in together, hence Donghyuck offered to move in with you to save up some money for rent and other expenses.

Lee Naeun stood there, still taller than Donghyuck, still the first person who ever kissed Donghyuck’s lips, still the first person you’d ever compared yourself to, wondering what she had that you didn’t.

Like the day they kissed in 2013, you looked away when Donghyuck finally reached to where she stood, wondering why, all of a sudden, many years later, the butterflies were flying all over in your stomach once again.

ginny williams, September 2020 – October 2020

Of course, the first woman that Donghyuck officially dated in university is from the UK. Jeno said he only dated her to show everyone he’s immensely improved in English.

The break-up was proof Donghyuck never improved in English. He didn’t even understand why she was breaking up with him.

park yesol, September 2021 – February 2022

You introduced Donghyuck to Park Yesol because it’s what she wanted for her birthday.

She had invited you to her 21st birthday. You and her, if you were being honest, barely know each other. You only shared a class in Literature once, so at first, it was a mystery to you why she suddenly invited you. When she’d asked if you could ask Donghyuck to RSVP with you, you’d known that it’s all she wanted from you.

Eventually, they’d start dating. Donghyuck, at that time, had been single for almost a year. He thought he convinced you that college was finally catching up on him hence he’d put a stop to his “demanding” dating life. However, Donghyuck is your best friend, and you could see right through him. You knew he liked someone he wasn’t willing to share with you, and he was probably working up the courage to ask that person out, which, when you thought about it, was new. Donghyuck was cunning and ambitious and he knew what he wanted and how to get it. He was never one to shy away from the people he liked, so it was a little suspicious that it took him almost a year to start dating again. You did not figure out who he liked, and you knew he’d only started dating Yesol to get you to shut up about it.

You and him knew it wasn’t a serious relationship because Yesol was dating other guys while she’d dated him. Donghyuck told you it felt like the relationship was just for sex because of his oozing sex appeal; you’d thrown a cushion at him when he’d said that.

Meanwhile, you and Jaemin were almost at pointbreak.

You didn’t want to spend Valentine’s Day being uncertain of the relationship would go, so you broke up with him on the first day of February. Jaemin had gotten an internship in Japan a few months ago, and the company that hired him liked him so much that they wanted to keep him while he finishes his degree virtually. You wished you could say the same, that you loved him so much you also wanted to keep him.

It was finally catching up to you and him, the distance. So, it was better you’d break it off before you and him start failing subjects just to keep a relationship steady.

Two and a half years together wasn’t enough. You and Jaemin wanted to spend the rest of your college years, at least, together. But like he said the night you’d ended it: it wasn’t worth it if it was compromising your mental health and studies. You’d cried so much that night, and you wondered if Donghyuck pretended he couldn’t hear you sobbing from the other side of the apartment.

Come Valentine’s Day, Donghyuck asked you to dress up, throwing a paper bag at you.

The place he “luckily scored” a reservation from, on a busy, fully-booked Valentine’s night, was nice. It was romantic and you were flushed and giddy from all the wine and all of the Donghyuck.

“Why are you here with me and not with Yesol?” you’d asked after the waiter filled your glass.

Donghyuck smiled at you. “I broke up with her two weeks ago.” Around the same time you did with Jaemin. “I figured if my best friend would be miserable on Valentine’s day, I should be, too.”

You laughed. “Well, you don’t look too miserable for a newly single man.”

“I’m not,” he confessed. “I’m never miserable when I have you.”

You reached out one hand, palm facing Donghyuck. He intertwined his hand with yours. And it fit perfectly. Just like the dress he got you.

your name, June 2022 – present (or alternately, sometime in 2005 – forever.)

“Lee Naeun, Kim Haerin, Im Jieun, Lee Naeun again, then Park Yesol,” you enumerate. “You were a ladies’ man!”

Donghyuck whines, begging you to stop as you go through his things in his room, particularly the notes and letters from the girls he’d dated.

You and him are moving out. Graduation is just around the corner, and you and Donghyuck decided to move on to a better place. Your boyfriend got a job in one of the biggest companies in his industry, while you’re yet to find yours.

“Don’t forget Ginny Williams,” he teases, throwing you a love letter from the bunch.

“You did not date Ginny Williams, Donghyuck. It was an illusion,” you scoff. “Tell me one conversation you had with her. A real one.”

“I swear to God, she loved me,” he answers. “Stop playing around and help me in here.”

You stand from the carpeted floor and walk towards Donghyuck as he sorts out the things from his study desk. Donghyuck starts with the tower of books and folders, organizing them alphabetically as he carefully places them on the box labeled as books. The other box is labeled as essentials; hence you start throwing his headphones and speakers and its chargers in. While doing so, you get a hold of a small box that contains what you thought were miscellaneous items mixed in with trash, until you realize what’s inside.

There are a few polaroid pictures of you and him from high school, including a picture of you and him on your high school’s graduation day, some receipts from, now you recognize, the places you’d gone to. There’s a receipt from when you and him took the subway to visit a museum at the other side of the country back in 2018, another from Valentines day 2022, when you and him celebrated being newly single, the old ticket from your senior prom when he’d gone with you, and so many more that you could recognize just from its dates.

“Donghyuck,” you whisper as you look at the box of memories. Donghyuck turns, eyes wide when he recognizes the box you’re holding. “Where… where should I put these?”

Donghyuck loved many girls in his life. You can recall their names in the order of when he’d dated them. You had your favorites and the ones you didn’t like that much. Some of your friends wonder if you’ve ever been insecure knowing you weren’t the first kiss or the first person he had sex with and if you were okay with knowing all of that. You weren’t the first and you wish you’d be the last. The only thing you’re certain of, is that he had always loved you, and that alone erases all the other thoughts.

If you could say so, you’re thankful for all of the girls he loved before because they made him the one you’d fallen for. Every dead-end street led him straight to you.

You stare at the mirror in your room blankly. It’s mocking you. Whatever you were planning to do is a bad idea. And maybe it was, but it had been months since you had gone out to a party thrown by your friends. Mainly because they were also his friends, and while they assured you that you were always welcome, you knew that Haechan did not share those same sentiments. His voice from the numerous voicemails he left you echo in your mind. 

“Are you serious? You said that you’d love me forever; you think it’s that easy to let you go?” 

“Are you seriously just giving up on us like this? I gave you everything. Every last piece of me.” 

“I know it’s over, yet I don’t want to let you go. You’re my gravity. I’m always drawn to you.” 

“Fine, I’ll leave you alone. Don’t come crawling back to me.” 

You had chalked it down to young love; the two of you had spent the last few years of high school together, and that continued when you went to college. But something snapped your 2nd  year and you couldn’t do it anymore. It was scary, growing up and settling down. Too scary. So even if it was a cowardly move, you left him. Of course, Haechan didn’t take it easily. You didn’t expect him to. 

It’s not like it was easy for you either. Up until that year, your life revolved around Haechan. In a way that wasn’t healthy. You had spent every waking moment thinking of him. He would get over it; that’s just the type of person he was. He never dwelled on anything for too long, and he never let it get him down. 

Unfortunately, you were terribly wrong; Haechan never got over it. Maybe on the outside, but if he was anything, he was a spiteful and prideful person. So he kept a lot of pent-up anger in that little body of his. The first time you had seen him after the breakup was terribly awkward, you didn’t know what to say or how to act. And Haechan was well… pissed. Rightfully so, but you had sworn to avoid any function that he would be at after that. 

And you had done a good job of that for the past few months. You had made new friends that weren’t his; you went to parties that he wasn’t at. You lived your life separately from his, and if you had to be honest, this was what you needed. Even if you loved Haechan with every last fiber of your being, you needed time and space from him to become your own person. 

Every time you had brought this idea up to him, it ended up in a fight. You don’t know who would start yelling first, who would take the chance to send a low blow. All you knew is that you would end up in tears, and the two of you would be too upset for any conversation after that. 

So now, almost two years after your breakup, you think it’s okay to finally attend a party you knew he would be at. You had given him enough time, and Jisung himself had personally requested that you be there. In fact, the text that he had sent you made you miss the younger male so much. He had always been such a sweetheart. 

jisung [3:20 pm]: please come to the party tonight jisung [3:20 pm]: just bc haechan got custody after the divorce doesn’t mean you can just never hang out with us  jisung [3:21 pm]: we aaaaaaaall miss you  jisung [3:21 pm]: (haechan included) 

But maybe you shouldn’t have trusted the male so wholeheartedly because the second you get to the party, you’re overwhelmed by the way Haechan doesn’t let you out of his sight once he’s spotted you. And you can tell he’s pissed. He ignores his friends, and his tongue is permanently pressed to his cheek. 

However, you can’t deny that he looks good. His hair is longer than you remember it being; it’s swept back to frame his face, and it gives you a full view of how his eyebrows are scrunched together. You assume it’s in anger, and you’re correct. Because pissed is an understatement for how Haechan’s feeling. 

He couldn’t believe that you had the nerve, the audacity, to show up to a party that you knew he would be at. You had done a wonderful job of pretending he didn’t exist for two years, so why the hell did you choose to show your face tonight? 

Seeing you woke up something in him that he believed died in him long ago. It was like the flip switched. Now don’t get it twisted, Haechan had not fooled himself like you had. He knew that he was never getting over you. Not when he had dedicated most of his adolescent years to loving you. You were all he knew. 

Even now, seeing you after months of getting his heart broken, he’s not even sure if he’s truly angry. Hurt? Yes. Confused? Absolutely. But these were all emotions that he didn’t want to explore, not today. So anger welcomes him with open arms, and he happily falls into it. Even so, he doesn’t think he could ever truly hate you. 

If anything, he hated how much he wanted to kiss you. 

So without warning, he’s walking across the room towards you. His jaw is clenched, and there’s a dent in the red solo cup he’s holding. He doesn’t know what he’s going to do or say, but he just knows that some part of him needs to be near you. 

“Why are you here?” His question is direct, and his clipped tone hits you straight in the heart. You have no right to be hurt, you know this. That doesn’t mean you don’t want to cry when his anger is directed towards you. But you would rather die than let him know he had any effect on you. After all, you were just as stubborn and prideful as him.  

“I was invited here by our friends,” you bite back, doing your best to seem just as pissed off as he was and making sure to emphasize the fact that they boys were your friends as well. “You don’t own this house, and you surely can’t police me on where I can and can’t go.” 

He hates that you’re right. His friends, while they were his friends first, had you known you just as long as he did. Perhaps he was blinded by his heartbreak to not realize that his friends also felt deprived of your presence as well. 

But that wasn’t his fault. You were the one who broke it off. 

“Cut the bullshit,” he says, fighting back the urge to roll his eyes. You had come to this party to start trouble with him. He was sure of it. “You made sure to avoid everywhere I go like it was the plague for almost 2 years. You can’t expect me to believe that shit now.” 

Unlike him, you don’t fight back the urge to roll your eyes. “We’re not doing this here,” you state blandly, grabbing the drink from his hands and toasting him. “Thanks for the drink, by the way.” As quickly as he approached you, you disappeared from his sight. He watches as you walk into the arms of some random person, and he feels his anger skyrocket. God, you were actually infuriating. Even more so because he found that attitude of yours to be so attractive. 

He decides to give you this one moment; you could think that you won this argument, but he would be back when he had more alcohol in his system. There was no way he wanted to argue with you sober; he would definitely crumble. As cruel as it was, he wanted to hurt you just like you had hurt him. 

. . .

You know it’s not the last of Haechan, not when you provoked him by stealing his drink. Which was disgusting by the way. It would be more convenient to walk around with an entire bottle of liquor than to nurse whatever that concoction was. (If you must know, it was mostly vodka. There was about less than 2% of juice in the cup. He had planned on getting hammered.) 

The red solo cup is quickly ditched on a random table, and you find yourself wandering around for a while. It felt odd to be in the presence of your old friends. It’s even more odd when you find yourself in the arms of Na Jaemin himself. The male has a cheeky grin on his lips, shit-eating if you will. He had stolen you away from the party, deciding that the quietness of the backyard was the perfect place for the two of you to catch up. Or attempt to.  

“You guys set us up,” you accuse, poking a manicured finger on his chest. He can only laugh, pulling you into a tight hug. He had missed you and your attitude. 

“Innocent until proven guilty,” he says, enjoying the way you almost melt in his arms. It had been so long since he had hugged you. When you had broken up with Haechan, Jaemin was the most distraught, as he was arguably closer to you than him. But Jeno had guilted him into ignoring you with something along the lines of ‘bro code,’ and he hadn’t made much of an attempt to ever hang out. You couldn’t blame him; you were a coward too.  

“Not funny, Jaem,” you pout, leaning your head on his shoulder as he rocked the two of you back and forth to the muffled music. “You guys didn’t even warn him about me coming. That’s cruel.” 

“No, what's cruel is listening to my friend cry over you for almost two years.” Well, he didn’t have to say it like that. “It’s ridiculous. Just talk to him, I swear he is not as immature as he was before.” 

“I find that hard to believe,” your words are muffled against his shoulder. With his arms wrapped around you like, it felt like everything would be okay. 

“Just trust me,” Jaemin says, pulling away from you. This only results in you whining, chasing the warmth of his body. “I’ll go get us new drinks.” 

You can only pout as the man detaches himself from you and disappears into the house. Now you’re left on the bench alone, left to deal with your thoughts. Has Haechan really spent the past two years talking about you? As much as you don’t want to believe this, you know that it was most likely true. Haechan was obsessive and stubborn. He most definitely was hung up on you. 

God, you were so stupid to think that he would ever be able to get over you, not to sound conceited. For the longest time, he was all you knew. He knew everything about you; he was there for every cry and laugh. Of course, he couldn't just let you go. 

And you couldn’t let him go, no matter how much you lied to yourself. 

You had tried going on other dates and seeing other people. But it was difficult. No one understood you like Haechan did. He was irreplaceable. 

“So this is where you went.” Why? Why did he choose now to come back? “What? Breaking my heart wasn’t enough? Had to break Jaemin’s too?” 

You can only groan at his words; these boys would not give up until you talked it seemed. What a disaster tonight had turned out to be. “Can we not?” 

“Well, when can we? Huh?” Haechan is visibly upset. His hair isn’t as neat as it was when you had run into him earlier; you knew that he had spent an astonishing amount of time running his finger through his hair for it to get that messy. He is also much more drunk, you note. You can smell the alcohol on him as he slides onto the bench next to you. “I think right now is the perfect time.” 

“You’re drunk.” It’s a simple fact, but it seems that Haechan is unaware of his own state.

“It doesn’t matter.” He’s whining now. Another sign that he was undeniably drunk. He was smothering and affectionate when drunk. It was impossible to deal with him. And he only proves this when his head falls onto your shoulder, his hands quickly seeking out your own in a death grip. He’s got you trapped now. 

“Even when we’re broken up my life seems to always revolve around you still,” you mumble, so unbelievably annoyed that the boys had pushed you right into Haechan’s arms. You couldn’t escape him even in your dreams, and apparently, fate seemed hellbent on making you suffer. 

“Still?” It’s like something clicks in him, and he’s suddenly sobering up quickly. This was why he was dumped? Because you loved him too much? “What do you mean by that?” 

“Nothing.” You want to disappear. You try to pull your hand away, but his grip only tightens. There was no way he was letting you slip away now. 

It’s so annoying to Haechan, the way that you’re here physically, but mentally, you’re so far away. You’re avoiding his eyes, and it bothers him so much more than he’d like to admit. His hands are gone from your own and quickly placed on your face; the way he turns your face towards him is rougher than he intends. But he just needs to see you. 

“Stop pushing me away.” It’s a demand, not a plea. “I know you don’t mean it.” 

“You don’t know me anymore,” you say, doing your best to mean it. Even if you wanted to erase him from your life, Haechan would be the one who knew you the best. Like you were the back of his hand. “So just let me go, please?” 

“Why?” He’s getting angry again, you can tell in the way he squeezes your jaw. “You want to go back to your boy toy Jaemin?” 

“You’re being ridiculous. You’re going to regret this when you sober up.” You regret this, and you weren’t nearly as intoxicated as him. 

“The only thing that’s ridiculous is you thinking you could replace me,” he says, using his grip to pull you closer to him. As much as you try to pull away, Haechan doesn’t let you go. Therefore you’re stuck in this position, a pout forming on your lips. He was too close for comfort. Without warning, he’s diving in and biting at your earlobe. “Does Jaemin know how sensitive your ears are?” 

You’re flinching away from his hold, feeling overwhelmed by Haechan being in your personal space. You couldn’t escape him. “Nothing can replace you,” you say quietly, feeling pathetically small in his hold. How could you cave in so quickly?

This is why you had avoided him like your life depended on it for the past two years. Not even 24 hours within his presence, and you were like putty in his hands. He knew exactly what to say and do to make you crumble. After all, no one knew you like Haechan did. 

That’s why you find yourself nodding mindlessly to his words, returning the small touches and kisses. You don’t even stop yourself when he pulls you onto his lap, marking up your neck, his hand gripping your thigh. Even though Haechan knows deep down that this isn’t right, he does know that you were destined to be his, and he would stop at nothing to make you his again.

Maybe that’s why you wake up in his bed the next morning, feeling absolutely horrible. His arms are wrapped around your waist, his face buried in your neck. It was like the past two years of avoiding him meant nothing. And it probably did, even if you want to deny it. 

You had grown, sure, but you could have grown with Haechan. But it was so scary. Being in love was terrifying. And facing your ex of two years after sleeping with him was just as scary. 

So you do what you do best.