PureRubbish!

MIDSOMMAR (2019) dir. Ari Aster

If you told me ten years ago that we weren’t alone, let alone, you know, to this extent, I mean, I wouldn’t have been surprised, but come on, you know… The epic forces of darkness and light that have come into play. And for better or worse, that’s the reality Morgan’s gonna have to find a way to grow up in.

Alright guys, I’m going to show you how I take my luscious locks and make them into rumble-worthy greaser hair.

Maybe I can …. shed some light on the situation.

That was a horrible pun, I know.

Step 1: Throw on your Greaser Jams. I recommend this song.

Step 2: Push all you hair into the center of your head and pin it with bobby pins

You’re aiming for a “fo-hawk” kinda look. You’re basically going to get a big floppy mohawk down the center of your head. Don’t forget to secure the hair near the base of your skull with bobby pins in an “X” formation so that the baby hairs don’t slip out and ruin your do!

Step 3: Tease it a bit.

Separate your hair into sections that you can curl and back comb it until your hair is a bit floofy, but not too much or the next step will be more difficult. 

You want it to be able to hold the form of a curl without too much hairspray, but you don’t want too much, or you’ve totally switched decades. 

(repeat above with your whole head)

Step 4: Time to curl that shit

The reason you curl it after you pin it is so your curls fall forward. You want to start father back and move your way forward so your little ducktail (your bangs) is the last thing that you curl.

Time for the little ducktail!!

Now this is the basic shape your do is going to have …. now onto the fun part.

Step 5. HEADBANG LIKE THE ROCK GOD YOU KNOW YOU ARE!

Step 6: Pin it so your do wont flop.

BOBBY PIN UNTIL IT LOOKS PRESENTABLE. 

I have to put a tiny bobby pin in the very center of my little swooshy curl in the front so it stays short enough. We don’t wanna look like an emo alpaca. 

Step 7: Now add your sideburns.

Every great greaser has killer sideburns. I use mascara to darken the ones I have and make them longer.

Step 8: Turn on the Stray Cats and go crusin’