the night in your dark room, you would sob into your sheets to the point you couldn’t breathe. pain was all you felt. you felt like nobody loved you. you couldn’t see yourself in the future. you hated how you looked like. it hurts so much.

it happened most of nights after school ended. each school day passed and you somehow made it through the day but school was just terrible for you. you weren’t mentally okay.

your sobs subsided as you heard the front door opening then closing, indicating that niki came home. you wiped your tears and pretended to sleep, holding in your choked sobs as niki entered the bedroom.

he felt sad. he knew your happy personality was just a show to the public. he knew about your depressive episodes but you didn’t want him to know. some nights when niki didn’t have to work late, he would sit next to your closed bedroom door and hear your muffled sobs. his heart breaks everyday knowing he doesn’t know how to help.

niki freshens up to go to bed and wraps his arms around your shaking figure. he hugs you closer to him, pecking the side of your face. your cries from earlier has settled and you fell asleep in his arms, feeling safe and warm.

hearing your soft snores, niki couldn’t fall asleep. he needed to let you know that he’s here for you. that he cares and loves you for you.

he spent all night hugging you closer, finding ways to help you.

you woke up earlier than niki to quickly get ready and put amounts of concealer on so he doesn’t see your puffy eyes and dark circles.

but niki watches you get ready and shed a few tears from bed. his heart hurts so much knowing that you’re hurting this much. he pretends to sleep in when you get up from your vanity and gets dressed for school.

you walk over to his side of the bed and wakes him up with the kiss on his lips. “wake up, you big baby” you giggled. niki opens his eyes and smiled, grabbing you and fell onto the bed next to him.

“niki! my makeup!” you whined. “you’re perfect without it, love” he said. you cringed and left the bed. you went on his side of the bed again and gave him a final kiss for the morning. “i’ll see you later at school, i love you” you smiled and waved bye to him. “wait y/n! i brought home food for you! take it for lunch!” “heard!”

since niki had later classes than you did, he came to school during your lunch time so came to school with your favorite coffee. he waited for you at your table but you never came. sunoo and jungwon found him and went to talk to him.

“where’s y/n?” sunoo asked. niki leaned back in his chair and sighed. “i’m not sure, she’s not answering my texts or calls” sunoo didn’t know if he should tell niki about what’s going on in class. he could tell your energy hasn’t been the same since then.

you were always your bubbly self and you were always smiling. but lately, it seemed like you were burnt out and you gave everyone a fake smile.

“niki-“ “babe!” sunoo was cut off when he heard you running towards the group. “sorry i’m late guys, i had to help my friend with her work she’s struggling with.“ liar.

you didn’t. you were late because you cried in the restrooms, overthinking and stressing. your assignments were killing you.

“it’s okay love, just eat okay?” he messed with your hair and you gave him a playful annoyed look. “i already ate in class, sorry i was really hungry” you giggled. liar, again.

you didn’t eat in class. you didn’t eat at all. you couldn’t recall the last meal you had. sunoo and jungwon looked at each other, since they sit behind you in class and heard your stomach rumbling.

you grabbed the water bottle from your bag and drank from it. niki was convinced this was all an act. he saw your eyes and how glossy they are. you’re still hurting.

sunoo and jungwon gave him a sad smile. “let me walk you to class, love”

you walked around the building, hands in hand. you passed the school garden and picked a flower and gave it to niki. you gave him the biggest smile you could and gave him a peck. “i love you.”

niki blushed and returned the kiss.

“i’ll see you at home okay?” you told him after he dropped you off at your class. niki nodded, grinning ear to ear.

two more hours and you were done with school. your professor had just have an easy day and have a make up work day. you were drained out and took a little nap until class was over.

2 minutes before dismissal, another one of nikis friend, jake, had came to your desk to wake you up. you fluttered your eyes open and saw a strawberry milk with a note on your desk.

‘you’re doing great love!

i love you so much ♡

— riki’

“thanks jake” you smiled. you packed all your stuff and left the class. you were going to go the route home, but your feet took you to a different route. your slow paced and a frown on your face was clearly evident that you’re not okay. passers looked at you, wondering why is there a young girl in her school uniform walking all the way here?

you look up and you were over the hangang river. you didn’t realize it was already 6, so an hour since class ended, which meant niki was already home.

niki brought home your favorite take out place since sunoo and jungwon told him you didn’t eat at all. jake also told him that you looked tired. he brought all these gifts he knew you’d like, especially this giant stuffed animal you eyed at miniso while window shopping.

so when he entered the house, he didn’t see your shoes. he placed every down and entered the bedroom. he didn’t see you. he looked everywhere for you. he panicked that it has gone this far and you were about to do something dumb.

he checked your location, only for it to say ‘location not found’. “fuck” he muttered. his world stopped when he has a feeling he’s losing you and it’s killing him. he needs you to be in his arms. he needs to tell you he loves you so, so much. he needs you here with him. he needs the love of his life.

he texts his friends to ask if they know where you are, only for them to say no. niki runs out of the house and begins to search for you everywhere.

your favorite cafe, favorite store, the park where you two hung out everyday during the early stage of dating. “where are you y/n” he whispered.

niki sits on a bench and tries to calm down, thinking where else you’d be. it was already getting dark and he was getting tired. but he needs to know where are you. and if you’re safe.

you’re now looking at the river, lifelessly. your phone has died and now you don’t know what’s the actual time. you don’t know where home is.

you fidget with your necklaces as tears streamed down your cheeks. you had almost forgotten about your necklace that niki gifted you, the necklace with a pink pendant, and an ‘r’ with a locator button in the pendant. he told you to always wear this special necklace in case something were to happen and he was there to save you.

accidentally pressing it, niki gets the notification from his phone. you were nearly 40 minutes away from him. niki hails a taxi to the bridge you’re at, shaking his leg up and down from the nervousness. he didn’t want to lose you.

arriving on the bridge, he saw your small figure in his favorite oversized jacket. he got out of the car and ran to you. you still faced the river emotionless. you heard rushed footsteps towards you but you didn’t worry about it.

you were going to move closer to the edge but niki grabbed onto you before you moved your foot. your eyes widen but felt comfort when you realized it was niki.

he held onto you tighter when he felt that you were lighter than the last time he held onto you. “r-riki..” you whispered out. you finally broke in his embrace, tears stainning his hoodie. “it’s okay. i’m here. i’m here my love.” he whispered into your ear, holding you closer.

a few minutes after you cried onto him, you two returned to the taxi and returned home. on the way home, you looked outside the window, hearing the same voices again.

‘he will leave you’

‘he doesn’t love you because of who you are’

‘everyone will hate you for someone you’ve become’

you silently cried, and since you sat behind the driver, he gave you a sad look. you took your hand away from nikis and wiped your tears. nikis heart still breaks.

you two arrived at home and niki told you to go inside while he pays the driver with extra tip.

he quietly enters the house and sees your backpack thrown on the living room floor. he hears your muffled sobs again but this time, he doesn’t just sit next to the door and listens. he enters the room and lays on the bed with you.

niki puts his hand on your side, letting you know he’s here. you move close to him, to hug him. he hugs you back as you release more tears onto his hoodie once again.

“do .. you love me, riki” you sobbed. his heart can’t take it anymore. he doesn’t know how to express how much he loves you. he’d do anything just for you to be safe and loved. he’ll make the rainy clouds go away just for the sun to shine on you. he’ll make everything about you because he loves you so much.

“of course baby. what’s wrong my love?” he runs his fingers through your hair. you tell him from how you’re scared of the future, you don’t like the way you look like, everyone will leave you all lonely, and how everything hurts so much.

niki is the next to release tears as it shocked you. “niki why are you-“ niki shakes his head. “you are loved. so so much y/n. you are loved and care for. i love you of who you are. don’t change for anyone, love. i love you so fucking much you don’t know. you are perfect to me.” he sobs.

he wishes he knew earlier how his baby was hurting so much. he hated that he found out the reason why weeks later when it began. he’s angry and upset that he didn’t talk to you about this earlier. he held onto you like there was no tomorrow.

niki held you closer, running his fingers through your hair, knowing it makes me feel calm. everything quiet down and all that was heard was your soft snores. niki looked down to you face and smiled. “my precious.” and planted a kiss on your exposed forehead.

from now on, niki was sure to be beside you. even if it meant if he was hurting too.

END <3. 

extra:

after school, he tried to look for you. after he saw the heartbreak in your eyes, he needed to apologize for everything. but when he found your friend walking around campus asking where you were, she told him that you were long gone. you had decided to study somewhere else than here. his heart ached. he hated himself. he hated how he did this for the 5th time. he actually lost you and it’s still his fault.

you gave your puppy some pats and cherished her. you picked her up and walked to the main hall. you saw the dinning room lights on with your favorite food made by your boyfriend wrapped in suran wrap. the behind you was your sleeping boyfriend on the couch, who was waiting for your arrival.

your heart broke, as you thought of jay. you felt bad that today was his only day off and he couldn’t spend the day with you. and how he showed his affection by cooking your favorite foods. you were so grateful for him.

so, you quickly went to your shared room quietly, and changed into your pjs. you carried your fluffy blanket and threw it on jay and laid behind him on the couch.

jay felt someone’s presence, and woke up. “y/n?” he mumbled. you hummed. jay instantly woke up and turned around, crushing you into a hug. “my love!” he exclaimed. you tiredly chuckled and a smile was left.

“thank you my baby,” you told him. jay questioned you. “thank you for making me food and loving me. it’s like i don’t deserve you sometimes.” you whispered the last part, hoping he didn’t hear.

but, he did.

“of course you do deserve me, love. you work an 8 hour shift everyday and go to school for 8 hours 5 days a week, leaving you alone with another 8 hours of sleeping or doing homework. you’re so talented and amazing at this y/n. and i want you to know that i’m forever by your side.” he paused, leaving kisses all over your face. “you never find time for yourself anymore. you never feed yourself with delicious meals. you’ve been staying up so late to complete your assignments. leaving you about 4 hours of sleep each night. sometimes i wished you could take a break and just hang out with me and nini. i miss you, you know? you’re overworking yourself and it’s hurting me y/n.”

“i love you so much and i don’t want you to overwork yourself. im always next to you, dont worry about bothering me for help, love.”

you didn’t know you were crying until you felt jay wipe your tears away. this day had finally came where you didn’t realize you overworked yourself to the max and jay was here to help you out.

“jay” you whimpered. “im sorry. i know you’re tired of me coming home late and-“ “shhh y/n. my love it’s okay. i just want you to have a full rest. you already did enough work. you need sleep baby. you’re gonna need to quit your job baby” he joked the last part.

you knew the night would come when he said you’ll have to quit your job. your job was so much work but little pay and you didn’t want jay to help pay for your college expenses, rent, and other expenses. you wanted to help out.

“but jay, i want to help myself out” “i know you do, but i cant bare myself seeing you struggle.” you ended up crying on his shoulder for the second time the night. you didn’t know what to do anymore. you felt so lost. should you just drop out of school? quit your job? god you felt so useless.

“i know it’s hard, but we’ll get through this, okay? i love you so much y/n.” he rubbed your back and planted kisses on your face. “let it all out.”

jay was the best boyfriend you could ask for. even in the darkest days, he’s always there to be sure you’re still smiling. hell be sure that you’re healthy. because he loves you so, so so much and would protect you from the dangers in life, even if that means if anything were to happen to him.

“i love you too, jay.”

END.

coming home late at night, the house reeked with different smells. you smelt the cigars left on the balcony, the alcohol from the kitchen, and some other disgusting smell.

“heeseung?” you called out. the moment he heard you, a struggled onto his feet and walked out of your shared room. “hi y/n” he said, drunk. he smelt like drugs and alcohol and you hated how you had to drench yourself in perfume to get rid of the smell for work and school.

“i’m leaving heeseung.”

“leaving for what babe” he giggled, almost placing kisses onto your neck til you stopped him. “i cant be do this heeseung. either you stop this or im leaving and i’m pretty sure you’ll choose whatever this crazy stuff you love to do over me, so we’re done heeseung.”

you were about to go up to your room until he grabbed your wrists. “damn right i choose drugs over you dumb bitch. waste of life honestly. just go and disappear while you’re at it. everyone hates you.” he spit at you.

you already had a bad day of work from the constant yelling from your boss and you had the courage to have a talk with heeseung with your cousin. the gaslighting he has done to you has never went this far until today.

so, you slapped him. “shut up heeseung! i was the only one who was willing to stay with your drug addict ass! the one who defended you. when you’re sober, which is never, talk to me and see how broken you’ll be when i’m gone.”

tears fell as you aggressively packed your belongings. pictures of you and heeseung on your walls to be reminded how strong your love was with him. how both of you were so loved.

when you gave heeseung that slap, he woke up, kinda. he didn’t know a harsh slap would realize what he had done to the love of his life.

he saw how your lips trembled in fear, he saw how you were trying to hold your tears, he saw how brave you were to talk to his stubborn ass. he saw how he broke the most precious girl.

2 years down the drain. he thought.

it took in action when he saw you struggling with a specific subject ar the schools library and he happened to be sitting next to you. you two eventually exchanged numbers. then heeseung began growing feelings for you and you did too.

after awhile, you two moved in with each other, so happy and madly in love. but things changed when you had to start working more to help you and heeseung out.

12+ hours and working two jobs and school, heeseung felt he was left in the dust. he told you that he’ll be the one helping more while you just relax and do school but you refused. an argument broke out because of this which resulted you leaving the apartment and heeseung left at home, stressed the fuck out.

he didnr wanr you to overwork yourself. he told you specifically you both will go half and half.

everything started going downhill when you found heeseungs piled up of drugs and alcohol in his closet. yet another fight broke out.

“maybe if weren’t being such a fucking brat and listened to me in the first place, i wouldn’t have done this!” he yelled. tears streaming down your face but like did heeseung care at all?

“i just want the best for us heeseung.”

4 months of this, you were out of that house you once called home. you blocked all contact from heeseung and moved back home to australia with your sister, who had supported you from this end.

you left heeseung the promise ring he gifted you on your birthday and no money for him to pay your side of rent. it was just him, and his little friends.

heeseung stayed inside most of the day. he reeked the smell of weed and he hated it. he now hates it.

he hates how you left him. he hates how he was the main reason of this. the night you left he ran to find his phone but to find it dead. he can’t even find his charger for goodness sake. he looked around the room and that’s when he broke down. “i cant live without you. come back to me please.”

another 3 years passed. you’re now 23 and finished your college years in australia.

honestly, you were so grateful to have your sister next to you. when you landed and went to her house, you immediately broke down. you lost all your confidence and felt lost in life. the words heeseung told you kept replaying in your mind and it drastically told you that you’ll never be enough for someone again.

but with your sister and her little growing family of hers, you’ve learned and healed from the past. as days of the crying to sleep alone, your nephew always came into your room late at night, hearing your muffled sobs next door. he always climbed into bed with you and brought you a smile. the morning of these kinds of nights, you always apologized to your sister for accidentally waking up her son.

when you went three years without heeseung, you always wondered how he’s been. is he still addicted to drugs? is he still drinking? is he happier without me? all these is questions. what if one day you’ll just see him walking by?

which is why you’re now back in korea. not to see heeseung, but ready to be fearless of a country you were scared of because of him.

your last secret handshake you did with your nephew brought him to tears. “i don’t want you to go! i don’t want you to be sad again. stay here with me and be happy please” he frowned. as much as you did want to stay, you had a big job opportunity there. it was either go big or go home.

your sister had told you if nothing works out there, you are always welcome back. you thank everyone and left, sending your nephew flying kisses until you couldn’t see them anymore.

when you arrived, you greet your mom who happily let you live with her. you left your stuff down and got

ready to see the brighter days in korea.

stepping out of the house, uou felt nostalgia. you remembered when you first started dating heeseung, he would always surprise you in the morning with your favorite cup of hot chocolate and walk with you to school.  

you ignored the feelings and went to the cafe your friend asked you to come hang out. entering, you wave at your friend but pointed to the front counter, indicating that you’re gonna order your drink first.

turning to face the worker behind the counter, your face fell. heeseung.

“y-y/n..” he spoke out. you felt everything suddenly come down and your lips started to tremble. eyes staring anywhere but him. “she’ll get the matcha latte. thank you” your friend butts in to save you and grabs your hand to walk to the table and comforting you.

“im so sorry my love i didn’t know he worked here” your friend said sadly. from heeseungs point of view from the beginning, he was flabbergasted. he didn’t know where you went after the breakup.

you weren’t registered in your college anymore and your mom didn’t tell him about your whereabouts. he lived in the house he once called home with you, lonely. he quit his addiction for drugs and alcohol, hoping you’ll come back home. even if it was just to pick up something, he just wanted to see you one last time.

he was so lost and broken. but a certain call snapped him out of it. the call was specifically from his brother who noticed so many changes when you left.

you actually told his brother everything heeseung had done. including the drugs. he was furious at his own brother but he also understood why you wanted to leave him. “god heeseung what am i going to do with you”

as heeseung walked to your table with your drink and a free pastry, you nervously held your friends hands. you thought you were over him. you didn’t fear him anymore. but you still had a little love for him. and heeseung knew.

he saw how shaky you were when he interrupted your conversation. “enjoy, and the pastry is on the house” he smiled and left.

when get got to the back when he was secluded, he broke down. he fucked up and he wished he could just time travel back.

he made the girl who showed light into his world fear him. he didn’t mean for it to come out like this. he wished he could just bring you into his arms, telling you it’ll be okay.

when you left, heeseung made sure he was going to sober up. he finally cleaned himself up and the house, waiting for you to come back. he changed, for you. but you never came back.

but he got the news when he were coming back home from a mutual friend who also worked at the same cafe with him. he was so relieved that you’re coming back. he knows not back into his arms, but knows you’ll be back.

“heeseung!”

hé suddenly stood up and ran to the front, wiping his tears. there stood a $20 bill as his tip and a note on the table.

“thank you, heeseung :)” he knew it was you. he knew your handwritting more than anyone else. he smiled and gratefully accepted the tip, even though you’re long gone.

the second interaction you had with him was when you were in a rush to get to your work building. what’s worst is that you were running late on your first day.

you lived a few minutes away from the building but the night before of crying your heart out just for heeseung wasnt helping at all. your eyes were still red and puffy.

running in the city of seoul, you accidentally bumped into someone and twisted your ankle from falling, and the coffee that spilled in your blouse. “fuck.” you muttered. you looked up and saw heeseung quickly getting up and helping you. “fuck y/n i’m so sorry. are you okay? can you walk?” he held his hand out for you. you grabbed his hand and winced as weight was added to the ankle that was sprained.

“god im so sorry y/n, i-“ “sorry, i have to get to work” you cut him off and ran off. heeseung sighed and walked home disappointed.

he really wanted to be clear with you and apologize for what he’s done in the past. he walked into the house and still saw some of your stuff just laying in parts of the house.

your scrunchie still laid on his desk, your polaroid was still on the fridge. like you were still here. for 3 years and he’s still hung up on you.

but as you ran inside the building, you quickly fixed yourself and walked to greet your new co workers, ignoring the fact that your have spilled coffee on you and a bruise forming on your ankle.

“y/n l/n?”

you turned around and saw the brightest smile back from high school. “sunghoon?” you ran to him and gave him the biggest hug ever. “oh my gosh y/n what happened!” he exclaimed. “don’t worry hoon, just a rough start today” you laughed it off.

sunghoon got the first aid kit he always carried with him and applied ointment on your bruise and bandaged it up and gave you his blazer to cover the stain on your shirt. “thank you hoon” you hugged him.

since the first day of work, you felt so happy seeing your old friend everyday. you two became closer again. you told him about heeseung and how you finished your education in australia. when you mentioned australia, he mentioned jake had moved there too recently for his education as well. making sure to plan a trip there to visit him.

the night of catching up with laughter and smiles, sunghoon walked you home since it was night. heeseung was closing the cafe so as he left, he saw you and sunghoon not too far away from him. he felt sick to his stomach. he didn’t know you knew sunghoon at all. but here you are, all close to him.

he felt lost and confused. as he got home, he went to the fridge and grabbed a beer from the back of the fridge, popping it open and chugging it. “i need you, y/n.”

when sunghoon dropped you off, you thanked him and told him to be safe on the way back home, even if he lived a couple floors down from you in the apartment complex. you turned around and saw your mom standing in the middle of the hall.

“mom!” you screamed, like it was a horror movie. “mom oh my god what are you doing awake?” you asked. your mom suddenly giggles. “ooh is my daughter finally falling in love? with my best friends son” she teases. you laugh as well. “mom hes just a big brother to me okay? and he already knows. plus you know about me and heeseung” you whispered the last part, almost tearing up. “it’s okay my child, i understand. by the way, clean out your stuff okay hon? you’ve stored too much of you stuff here like i don’t have my own room here!” she laughed. you nodded and gave her a goodnight.

opening your bedroom door, god she was not kidding at all. you began cleaning out your closet then the extra room that was for your other stuff. you didn’t even care what it was, if you didn’t need it, you just threw it out.

the sun was rising and you were still cleaning, but you were almost there! thank goodness there was no work or else you would’ve been dead. you put the pile of clothes to give away in front of your door and another pile of trash next to it, noting to take it out when you wake up.

you were about to fall asleep until you got notifications.

heeseung lee @heeseungz has followed you.

@heeseungz wants to send you a message.

— i miss you so crazy bad y/n.

then suddenly, memories with him clouded your mind. it’s been 3 years and you’re still not over him. it’s so stupid how he said things to you, hitting your insecurities and then still being in love with him. ‘you’re so stupid y/n’

back in australia, you kept reminding yourself you didn’t need heeseung. you were fully healed from him, but every blind date your sister put you on, it didn’t feel the same. like there was no other person than heeseung. nobody could be like him. so you told your sister to just stop wasting her time in which she understood.

you would walk to school and see all these cafes and cute areas that heeseung would take you back home. everything just reminded you of him and you would always come back home crying in bed.

his words replayed in the back of your mind, which sent triggering messages. you swore you would find new love, but your heart still beats for him only. you still loved him.

overthinking took your mind, so now it was 8 in the morning and you haven’t slept. sunghoon had sent you a message but you didn’t bother to check it. you laid in bed, sad and lonely, and wanting to feel the warmth from heeseung again.

you closed your eyes and you felt you slept for a few minutes, but really was 4 hours. you woke up and heard your mom and sunghoon talking.

“hoon-ah, she always wakes up crying and i just feel awful i cant do anything. i’m not sure if her relationship with heeseung really hurt her or australia impacted her.” sunghoon could only sigh. he shouldn’t told her your business about heeseung and you, but she’s your mother for goodness sake.

he didn’t want to keep this going on and continuing to hurt you even more, so he did the right thing and told her everything.

she didn’t understand why you suddenly dropped your stuff at her place and moved to australia. she didn’t stop you, as long as you were happy, she’s happy. but now she knows. and it’s all because of lee fucking heeseung.

he was the one who hurt her precious daughter. she didn’t know how to react now that he’s been dropping off food for you whenever you’re out, to make sure you’re well fed. now everything is finally connecting.

you slept for another good hour and finally woke up at 1 pm. you stumbled on your feet and went to your bathroom to freshen up. you didn’t expect to see the trash bags gone and you asked your mom what happened to it. “sunghoon came over this morning to make us breakfast but you were still asleep. then he offered to take the bags to trash” you hummed. you were about to go back to your room until your mom stopped you.

“y/n, why didn’t you tell me about heeseung?”

that’s it. this is when you have to explain everything. you knew this was going to happen. you sat her down on the couch and talked to her, something the two of you haven’t done in a while since you began working so much. the day ended with tears and laughter.

you told her you still loved him even with the words he said to you. she was against you going back to him, but she wants you to be happy again. she doesn’t want to hear her daughter crying every morning thinking about the guy who broke her.

another day off, you took a morning walk with your headphones in. you saw heeseung in the distance, looking at the sun rise. it was so beautiful he thought. he thought he could just do his daily morning jogs to get you off his mind but it never worked.

“the view is pretty, isn’t it?” you striked the conversation. heeseung turns himself to you and smiled. “good morning y/n.” “morning hee” he swore his heart clenched when he heard you say his favorite nickname. “so, how are you?”

from that point, you and heeseung were finally in good terms. you told him your life in australia and school and how you reunited with sunghoon at work.

“y/n, i just wanted to say. i’m sorry what happened years ago. it still doesn’t sit right with me that i didn’t chase you after you left that night. and if something was to happen to you that night, i wouldn’t had forgave myself. and i still don’t to this day.” he paused and held your hands. “what i’m saying is, i’m willing to start again. as friends. i’ve changed for you y/n. im willing to try again”

it was silence for a bit until he heard your sobs. he panicked and wiped your tears. “y/n-“ “heeseung” you frowned. “i’ve waited three years for this” both of you let out a chuckle. “god i’m still in love with you”

since then, you two were coming close again. and he was right. he quit his addiction and changed for you. you slowly let your parents and sunghoon get more comfortable  with having heeseung around. they felt relieved that you were smiling all over again, but still kept a close eye on heeseung.

your sister was happy about the news. however your nephew wasn’t. “noona! you promised me you wouldn’t be with that bad guy again!” and “noona i will go there and beat the bad guy up if he hurts you again!”

every morning, you’ll wake up next to heeseung and he’ll walk you to work. the days you didn’t have work but he did, he made sure to leave loving notes around your room since it was early in the morning and you needed your rest.

days when both of you were off, days were spent in your used-to-be house with heeseung. slow dancing in the dim lighting will light chill music playing and the busy streets underneath you two. you two shared your first kiss after years and smiled. “i love you so fucking much, damn it!” heeseung cursed.

“watch your language, hee” you giggled. “be mine? again?” he asked. “as if we weren’t already dating these past months, hee.” you kissed him. “i love you.”

you and heeseung were back together and decided to find a place together, again. the apartment you had with him was so amazing with the loving view, but it was a new start. you wanted to be closer to work and to your parents and sunghoons apartment complex.

you found the perfect one with spacious living and was a walking distance to everywhere. the view was spectacular and now that you and heeseung had everything settled, it won’t be like the same from before. you two planned things perfectly and heeseung swore on his life he will never do drugs again and only drink lightly. and if he broke those promises, he told you you can leave him once again and make sure he doesn’t come into your life again.

“heeseung stop being silly right now, we’re healthy right now” you laughed. “i know, but i’m just saying. i don’t want to lose you again y/n” he hugged you from behind, looking at the river view through the tall windows. “thank you for everything, hee”

your little session together was interrupted when a doorbell rang. you opened it and saw all of heeseungs friends, including jake who just finished a semester of college and sunghoon. “hyung!” you heard one of them say.

to be honest, you only knew jay, sunghoon, and jake since you all went to school together. but heeseung eventually introduced sunoo, jungwon, and niki to you, who are still in their first year of college.

later your parents came over to the new unit and heeseungs parents greeting you with love. “welcome back our lovely y/n!”

then your favorite little nephew came to visit you, as well as your sister and her husband. “noona!” he ran to you. you gave him a big hug and smooched him all over his face. “n/n! i missed you so much! how’s school” “it’s good! i learned so much already. but you teach me more things that are better than at school noona”

heeseung came next to you. “is this the little man you always talk about love?” your nephew gasped. “noona is this the bad guy? but he looks so handsome and tall” you and heeseung giggled. “yes love this is the guy who hurt me” heeseung carried your nephew. “woah you’re so handsome though” he was so fascinated that he started to play with heeseungs cheeks. you took a picture of this moment, smiling in this moment.

you two were so much happier now. all it took was one word. you knew you made the final choice on staying with him, once again.

END.

heeseung:

- you woke up to wanting to cut your nose off and punch your throat for making your morning feel so uncomfortable. you thought it was just morning sickness so you got ready for school the way you would normally.

- you woke up to wanting to cut your nose off and punch your throat for making your morning feel so uncomfortable. you thought it was just morning sickness so you got ready for school the way you would normally.

- as you got to school, you met up with your boyfriend. and as soon as you ran up to him and gave him a big hug, he felt your head burning up. “you sick?” he asked.

- as you got to school, you met up with your boyfriend. and as soon as you ran up to him and gave him a big hug, he felt your head burning up. “you sick?” he asked.

- you gave him a weird face and said “no?” until he grabbed your wrists and led you to the nurses office.

- the nurse had confirmed you were in the beginning stage of a flu, so heeseung took you home and made you stay in your bed while he made you soup. chicken noodle soup actually.

- heeseung cleaned all of the surfaces of your house to make sure your space was cleaned. as he was done, he quietly ran up to your room and saw you sleeping.

- your bangs were slightly covering your face and your covers were up to your chin. he felt your forehead with the back of your hand and still burnt.

- heeseung knew it’ll take days for you to recover from your flu, so he made sure you were stocked up on soups and medicines for you to recover safely.

- as the days went on, you were feeling much better. but heeseung grew sick as well.

- “your turn to baby me”

･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ.

jay:

- it was your birthday and jay decided to treat you to a fancy restaurant after he got off of work, which was around 6. you two planned to meet at 7:30

- as soon as the clock hit 7:00, you had a massive headache. you took medication to try to release the pain but you nose felt congested and your throat started to itch.

- you texted your friend, who was studying to be an aspiring doctor, and told her your symptoms. later she texted back that you could potentially have the flu so you need to stay back home and rest.

- it was eventually 7:20. you were getting worried that you’ll have to cancel the date over some kind of sickness. but you knew you had to do it, to keep jay safe. even if it was your birthday.

- as you were about to dial his number, you heard your name being called. you ran outside of room and saw your boyfriend with ingredients to make the perfect soup for you and snacks.

- “you friend texted me that you have the flu, so i’m here to stay with you and take care of you love” he smiled.

･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ.

jake:

- the night before jake came home, you felt you were running a fever. so you took medicine. you didn’t think you’ll be knocked out after taking it so when jake came home and didn’t see you in the living room, waiting for him, he felt sad.

- he had a bad day at work and he just wanted to be greeted with your hugs :(

- so instead, layla came out from your room and went to greet jake. jake smiled and played with her for a bit, then layla got up and ran back to your room, jake following her.

- he saw that you were knocked out in the cold and planted a kiss on your face, feeling bad that he came home late. he went to wash himself up and returned to bed.

- before jake fell asleep, he held you to sleep with layla on the foot of the bed.

- the morning came and jake woke up early to make you breakfast. it was his day off and he was excited that he could spend the day with you.

- when he came into the room with breakfast in his hands, he tried to wake you up. you opened your eyes and tried to get used to the bright sun shining through your windows. but with the headache and the congested nose you had, you just wanted to sleep in.

- you threw the covers back on you and covered your whole body, jake giving layla a ‘what just happened’ face.

- it was 11 am and jake was in bed, hugging your figure. he thought you were just tired from work the previous day. but when the clock hit 1 pm, he knew something was up.

- “y/n. baby wake up” he whispered softly. you only whined from being disturbed, but fell back to sleep instantly. “love?” he nudged you.

- you slowly opened your eyes and saw jake being concerned. “yes jake?” you whispered weakly. “everything okay?” you nodded.

- “babe, you’re burning up.” he felt your head and left the room to go get medicine for you and a cold cloth. you sat up confused, and layla going up to cuddle with you.

- 15 minutes later, your eyes felt dry and jake was taking forever, so you fell back asleep with layla. when jake finally arrived with snacks and medicine, his shoulders slumped.

- “babe, you need to take medicine first” he got the medicine ready for you and sat you up carefully. “i’ll be here until your recovery love.”

- and he stayed there next to you to get rid of the fever.

･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ.

sunghoon:

- “yah, y/n wake up” he stood next to your sleeping figure. “it is 2 pm and you’re still sleeping?”

- “sunghoon, i don’t feel too good.” you whimpered. he was confused and felt your forehead and realized it was a bit too warm for his liking.

- “did you dance in the rain?” he scoffed. he actually didn’t know what to do in this situation, so he left to go buy medicine and ask your mom for your favorite chicken dumpling soup.

- you felt bad he found out you were sick this way and thought he wouldn’t return until you’ve recovered, so you shut your curtains to make your room dark and fell back asleep.

- sunghoon was making all sorts of noises in the kitchen. pots and pans were making noises and the screams he made he accidentally thought he cut off his finger. this is why you were the cooker in the relationship.

- but after all the yelling and cluttering noises, he made the dish he knew you would feel better.

- having a rag under the hot bowl and his other hand holding your medicine, he quietly entered your room and turned on the light, which made you wake up from your slumber.

- “sunghoon” you whined and covered your eyes.

- he put the food on your nightstand and carefully lifted you up to sit up. he first gave you a gulp of your medicine, then fed you the soup. blowing on it in case it was too hot.

- when you finished, sunghoon got up to clean up but you stopped him. “lay down with me, please?”

- “of course, milady”

- he held you until you fell asleep, kissing your head. ‘get well soon my love’

･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ.

sunoo:

- you and sunoo had thought it’ll be a fun late night date to the park to relieve some stress. on the way back home, it started pouring.

- the two of you ran back home soaked, but took a shower in the separate bathrooms you had at home.

- the next day, you woke up with a pounding headache and your throat being itchy, but sunoo felt fine.

- sunoo laughed at you for being crazy and running in the rain last night, but stopped and cleared his throat when you looked sad.

- “hey hey hey it’s okay. i’ll take care of you” he went up to you and brought you in his arms. “i don’t want you to get sick though” you frowned and cried into his chest.

- “it’s ok, i have a strong immune system!”

- the day consisted of sleeping in the living room watching disney romance movies and sunoo taking care of his lover <3

･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ.

jungwon:

- when you texted him that you wouldn’t be going to school because you fell with a fever, he ran to your house.

- and when he got there, he began scolding at you. “y/n, why we’re you even out late at night? with a sick person too? do you not know the consequences?”

- your head was pounded and you felt dizzy, so you walked back to your room and fell on the bed, getting cozy. jungwon sighed and felt bad that he yelled at you when it wasn’t your fault.

- he began making you soup and researching all the things to make a fever go away on google.

- when you woke up, you felt jungwons presence behind you. “im sorry i yelled at you, i know it’s not your fault.”

- you turned around and saw his beautiful face, smiling.

- he led you to the kitchen where your mom’s homemade soup was on the table and you ate every bit of it. “thank you won”

･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ.

niki:

- “niki” you called out for him. you woke up during the day and opened your eyes to seeing niki sitting on the floor, back pressed onto the bed while playing video games. “niki!” you yelled out a bit louder.

- opening your eyes wider, you saw his headphones on. so you laid on your stomach and hugged him from behind. your cheek grazing on his where he felt the burning sensation. “omg y/n! are you sick?” he exclaimed.

- he went to feel your forehead and you were indeed sick. “i gotta go guys!” he told his friends on the game and got up. “go back to bed y/n, i’ll be right back.”

- you slowly went back to the position you were in earlier as he went out to get some stuff. ‘weirdo’ you thought, and scrolled through your phone.

- a few minutes passed and your phone was taken away by niki as he handed you some medicine to take. “you’re being over dramatic niki” you laughed

- “not when you’re literally burning up y/n. you need to take care of yourself love.” in the end, you knew he was right.

- so you listened to niki on taking your medicine every 4 hours and eating hot soup to sooth your throat.

- the next week, niki got sick and you had to take care of him. but before you got out of bed, he snuggled into you closer. “i just need to hug you to recover.”

- “weirdo”

end.

a month earlier, you were waiting in the cold outside the museum that had recently opened. you told heeseung about it and he excitedly bought the tickets just for your special date night. after all, you did deserve it.

as you waited outside, you snuggled into your scarf that heeseungs mom had made for you and your hands out to text him.

everytime you looked up, you hoped to see him running towards you, but it was now dark and snow was falling. you looked around you and couples were snuggling with each other and seeking shelter, or going inside the museum.

2 hours you had waited for him.

you went home and got into comfier and cozy clothes, finally throwing yourself in your bed and crying your eyes out.

you were the person to overthink the worst situations possible so you didn’t know how to cope. heeseung still didn’t answer his phone.

in the end of the night, your eyes widen when you heard your front door open. you ran to the hall that faces the front door and saw a drunk heeseung. “heeseung..” you spoke out, slowly stepping in front of the boy.

he looked so worn out and you felt bad. but the same time, you remembered your date earlier that he forgot. did he purposely ignore you and the date to go drink?

heeseungs eyes found your figure and almost tumbled on you. “i want nylou” he mumbled. your eyes widen. “who’s nylou?”

you’ve never met a person with that name, nor has heeseung mentioned them before. your eyes are turning glossy and almost a sob breaks out. “hee, w-who is that?” you asked him.

he’s too drunk to respond, so the only thing he can do is cling onto you tighter. “heeseung!” you yelled out. heeseung grumbled, and answered “shes this person i know.” you mentally wanted to slap him. well duh heeseung! “i love you y/n” he smiled.

at this point, you stopped trying. you took heeseungs arms off of you and stomped to your room, slamming the door loud enough for him to stir out of his drunken state.

before you went away, heeseung was slowly sobering up. he noticed how your tears were falling and he did nothing to make you happy again.

he fell onto your couch and held his head. ‘god heeseung you’re so stupid.’

who even is nylou. right, his cousin’s newborn. since the birth of nylou, heeseung had been going to see her to talk to his cousin about you.

“y/n is the most amazing person i’ve ever been with. she truly deserves to be loved and happy.” he paused and smiled. “one day, i hope get on one knee and propose to her. marry the love of my life and start a family.”

he was gushing all over you to his cousin, which his cousin just laughed at. seeing his once little cousin talk about his lover made him see how much he had grown.

during high school, heeseung had no interest of things. he didn’t like any of his classes, had no friends, nothing. but when you transferred to his school, he swore he saw color. you were the most beautiful person he had ever seen.

things were pretty much lucky for him when he realized you were in all of his classes. first, he was your partner for physics. you two were doomed when you both found out you and him had never paid attention in class to actually know what’s going on.

secondly, he befriended you and asked for your number to take you out on a boba date, since he promised you he’ll take you to one if you passed the project.

then, he grew feelings for you. he happily confessed hours before the graduation, and you gladly accepted his love for you.

now two years later, you too were  in the same university. of course getting married and having a family was too early for the both of you, but you two knew you were destined together.

—

you wake up with swollen eyes with a little cold from the previous night, but you still got up since you have assignments to turn in. you did your makeup and everything and left your room and see heeseung in the kitchen making breakfast.

he turned around and smiled, but soon fell when he saw your state. your eyes were still red and your face looked paler than usual. he knew it wasn’t your makeup because you only did your eye makeup.

he felt your forehead with the back of your head. “y/n you’re burning. you shouldn’t go to school like this” you rolled your eyes. “now you care? i wouldn’t be sick if you didn’t go drink and said some other persons name last night.” you paused and took two pills to help your cold. “let’s just break up heeseung. you’re seeing someone. don’t bother me anymore. just leave me alone for now on. ” you said and left.

heeseungs heart fell. ‘wow’ was all he could say. he didn’t even get to explain himself. his thoughts stop when he reads the bottle of pills you took, which were sleeping pills.

you only took these if you had a hard sleeping when heeseung couldn’t sleepover. you’ve mistaken the bottle as tylenol instead. “fuck” heeseung whispered.

he cleaned up the food and drove to school.

—

heeseung monitored you behind you closely. you haven’t fell asleep yet or anything, but he wanted to make sure you were okay.

“hey hee hyung, you and y/n okay?” jake walked up to him. he saw that his two friends haven’t been talking to each other. you looked like you were on the verge of fainting and heeseung looked like he was going to cry about you for the fifth time today. “yeah, everything’s perfectly fine” he inhaled.

it was a free period only for you and heeseung, as well as a few more students. you roamed around the school to get your thoughts out from earlier. walking up the stairs seemed a bit of a workout for you.

you usually wouldn’t be gripping the rail this tight and wouldn’t feel so light headed. and that’s when heeseung caught you in his arms. he quickly rushed you to the nurses to leave you to rest.

the nurse had closed the curtains to give you some space as heeseung sat next to the closed curtains, nervously tapping his feet.

“my boy, you should get to class. it seems like her cold is getting worse. but don’t worry, i’ll call you when she’s awake.” heeseung nodded but remembered how you didn’t want to see him again. “thank you, but can you call jake sim instead?” the nurse nodded her head and heeseung looked at you one last time.

since his classes ended earlier than yours, he went to your apartment to pick up his stuff he had left behind and leave your spare keys you gave to him on your counter. before he closed the front door, he looked around. this was where you two had your first project together. where you two cried over a kdrama. where you got drunk together, and where you two slowly danced in the living room with the lights dimmed and slow jazz music playing.

—

when you woke up from your slumber, you saw jake next to you. “jake” you called out. he looked up from his phone and gave you a smile. “hey y/n-“ “what just happened?” you cut him off.

after heeseung left your place, he gave jake a call. crying how he messed up and now there’s no way nobody could ever replace you. he also told jake what happened in the morning which is why he’s here now. but jake was told to not tell you that heeseung sent him here.

“have you been eating well y/n? you passed out on the staircase and you have a fever.” he scolded you. “who brought me here?” you asked. jake seemed to get nervous now. how was he supposed to tell you?

“h- i did. i was going to the staircase and i found you laying there. god y/n, you scared me. you need to monitor what you’re doing.” you nodded.

you took a week off of school to get rid of the fever you had. when you arrived home, your place looked blue. heeseungs stuff was gone and his key was on the counter.

you looked everywhere for him, but even his toothbrush was gone. you fell onto the floor and cried, missing his warmth already.

you can still smell his perfume that he used. you were struggling to get better yourself. usually if you were sick, heeseung would drop everything and make you a bowl of chicken noodle soup for you. but now that he’s not here, you had to learn.

during the week you weren’t at school, heeseung had copies of his notes and homework for you so you wouldn’t be behind. he gave jake your papers to give to you.

but when he got home each day, he would breakdown. he still had your pictures around his house and your scent. you rarely had stuff at his house because he preferred staying at yours because it ‘looked better than his.’

so when he was putting his stuff away, he saw your pink hoodie in his closet. well, technically his but you always looked cute in it. he took the hoodie off the hanger and held it in the palms of his hands, your scent still lingering on it. “heeseung, dinners ready.” his mom called out.

now, everyday is the same routine. wake up, intense layers of concealer and foundation, and leaving. you hated heavy makeup, but since the dark bags won’t go away, this will have to do for now.

your oversized blue hoodie and leggings, ready to ace this exam. before the test were given out, your phone buzzed before you could turn it off.

big bro <3:

hey, ik you’re taking your exam right now, but mom is in the hospital. whenever you can, please come here. this could be her last time seeing us as a family

the last sentence was enough to make you breakdown into tears. since your class had to sit by alphabetical order by last name, you were in front. so heeseung could see you practically shaking.

you raised your hand, asking if you could use the restroom real quick. the teacher saw the distressed look on your face, like you were about to break and immediately let you go.

she then looked at heeseung, telling him this could be his time to fix everything. since the first day you took your week break, she saw how broken the boy looked so she could tell something terrible happened between you two.

heeseung made sure to thank her later on, but what was on his mind was to look for you and hug you.

he found you in an abandoned classroom when he heard sobs. he quickly opened the door and saw you leaning against the walll, roughly wiping your tears away and walking towards the door.

“i told you to leave me alone heeseung. what part do you not unde-“ you got cut off when heeseung walked to you and hugged you. “let it out y/n. let it all out.” was all you needed to hear.

you were so stressed with studying for midterms, and still thinking what happened the month before. you didn’t have much friends other than jake and heeseung, but you had a habit of bottling it up. you didn’t mean to, it was just how you were.

so hearing those words made you feel calm. you cried onto heeseungs jacket. “you wanna talk about it?” you nodded.

“i didnt know because i don’t live with my family. but my brother texted me saying my mom is put onto her death bed right now. and she won’t win her battle. and now how will she see me walk across the stage, getting my degree? she would’ve been so happy for us.” heeseungs heart swelled when you said the last word. “and us heeseung,”

“every night, i cry myself to sleep thinking about us. if i was in the wrong place to tell you that were over when i didn’t let you explain. jake had explained everything to me. i’m sorry hee. i should’ve let you explained. i know you didn’t mean to forget our date. he did tell me you were stressed about life and it got to me. you never told me your problems but you would listen to mine. it makes me feel like i’m the clingy one. when i had that fever, i always relied on you to help me feel better. when i had the worst days, you told me you were proud of me for overcoming it. jake also told me about nylou and your cousin gave me a call to meet baby nylou and told me your plans in the future. you were so good to me. im sorry this is how everything turned out.”

this time, heeseung silently let his tears stream down. it was his fault in the beginning. he left you alone in the cold and made you get sick. he left you alone with you and your thoughts alone. he was most importantly glad that you had overcome your bad days, which was almost everyday was what jake told him.

when you didn’t hear heeseung for a while, you looked up and saw tears. “heeseung” you frowned. “i-m s-sorry y/n. i really am.” he sobbed onto your shoulder. you let your hand play with his hair, calming him down.

“none of this is your fault, okay? i shouldn’t have kept myself from you. im still upset at myself for leaving you out in the cold waiting for me. but i still love you. im so in love with you. and i’m sorry about your mom. she always wanted to see us on the stage together and walking down the aisle with us. she doesn’t need this.” heeseung paused.

“we should get back and take our exams then go see your mom. yeah?” he asked. you nodded and wipe both yours and his tears away. standing up to look presentable, heeseung grabbed your hand and intertwined them with his.

the smell of the hospital always seemed to haunt you. since your grandfather, you never wanted to be here.

but as you walked to her room, you immediately cried and ran to your mom. she had all types of tubes connected to her and her eyes were barely opened. “y/n, my baby” she whispered. you went closer to her, hugging her as she tried her best to lift her arm up to hug you, as you sniffled.

heeseung almost cried when he heard her call out his name and signaled him to come closer. “heeseung, you’ve gotten more handsome the last time ive seen you” he chuckled. “please make my daughter the happiest she’ll ever be. make her feel loved. if you can find it, i’ve hidden my secret recipes at her place so you can make her favorite food” “mom~” you whined.

everyone in the room chuckled or just smiled a little, knowing this will be the last minutes. but as the like went flat, you screamed.

you didn’t want your mom to be taken away from you. as the nurses were rolling her bed from her room, you hysterically cried out loud. heeseung held you until you were calm.

“hee.” you quietly called out. heeseung gave you a hum to let you know he was listening. “please don’t leave me either.” you cried. heeseung lifts his head up and shakes his head. “i love you too much to do that.” he smiles and wipes your tears away.

two years later, you and heeseung were now doing better together. you two had finally graduated and walked across the stage. you gave a speech to the students graduating, and thanking your mom for everything.

you went to your moms grave, to let her know how many thinks you’ve accomplished. and how much you missed her and how badly you wished she was here right now.

everything was rough after your moms death, but heeseung, his family, and jake were able to help you pull it through.

heeseung had moved into your apartment since it was close to everything and he wanted to be there for you everyday, every night, every second.

the night of you and heeseungs graduation party that his parents hosted, you held nylou in your arms again after 2 years and heeseung was in awe. he knew he found the right one. you then met heeseungs other friends, jay, sunghoon, sunoo, jungwon, and niki and you plus jake hung out with them since then.

a few days later, heeseung had booked a trip for just the two of you to paris. who knew that you’ll be leaving your country as boyfriend and girlfriend and then returning engaged?

everyone was excited for the two of you, waiting for the most exciting day to come. and it’s finally here.

walking down the aisle with your arms linked to your dads, you saw heeseung ahead, patting his cheeks dry. you smiled big and laughed at him from afar. to your right, you saw your side of your family, as well as a portait of your mom on front seat next to your dads.

your left, you saw heeseungs family, you never knew how big of a family he had, but you were happy to meet them later on in the night.

nylou was now 4 year old and was the flower girl of the ceremony. heeseungs friends were his groomsmen and jake was his best man. your friends on your side. the decoration and venue was the dream wedding you always had.

your dad gave you to heeseung and started tearing up. after each vows were said, heeseung kissed your lips before they announced that he may kiss the bride.

cheers and smiles were all around the venue, and you couldn’t be any happier. you two took a month vacation of your honeymoon to the islands. but when you came back home, you non stopped threw up and had weird cravings.

at first, heeseung suspected you of being pregnant. but there was no way until you took a test. “wow” you said. “yeah, wow” heeseung said after you, hugging you from behind. “you think we’re ready?” you asked him, tears already falling. “it’s okay, we’ll learn throughout the process.” you both smiled.

“i promise to make you smile and feel loved y/n”

END.

you stayed home, wanting someone to hug you. the days you didn’t want to do anything. you scrolled on social media, only to feel so insecure. you lifted your shirt slightly, staring at the amount of extra skin you had. you took your blankets off of you and stared at your legs.

“oh my god..” you let yourself stand in front of your mirror, making disgusting comments about yourself. you hated how you looked.

it was all your fault, you thought. ‘i should’ve been aware what i posted back then. i miss them so much’. you lost friends due to your stupid actions. so you cut them off, hoping to heal from the lost friendships. but as you saw them, you felt yourself falling even more. wanting to do nothing but shame yourself.

you wanted to be skinny. you wanted to be pretty. feel so loved. have people by your side. you fell to your knees, tears falling. ignoring the messages about the concert youre planning to go to with your boyfriend.

you wanted to go. it was your favorite band, but you didn’t have the excitement to purchase tickets. you felt so lost. you didn’t know what was wrong with you.

nothing seemed to excite you currently. you felt so lost and confused in life, you laid in the middle of your bedroom floor, just crying. “what the actual fuck is wrong with me.”

things quickly changed when you felt a pair of arms wrap around you. you opened your red, swollen eyes and saw your boyfriends concerned face.

“y/n… my baby. what’s wrong my love?” he asked, wiping your tears away. the moment he walked into your house, he felt blue. your fairy lights in your living room wernt on. there was no food made or leftovers in your fridge. no snacks were eaten. everything looked clean, which meant this was bad.

three days with no contact with his girlfriend, god he felt so bad. he had no idea what happened. nobody had knew what you were up to. you locked yourself inside your apartment, hoping everything will be okay.

but from what you posted on your private twitter, that you had forgotten that he followed you on, you ranted on and on about what’s wrong and why you shut yourself out from the world.

“i-i just want hugs hoon.” you said quietly. he understood and picked you up softly back onto your bed. he tucked you in and hugged you close. your head on his chest, hearing how fast his heart beats for you. “i love you so much y/n.”

“i know you heard this so many times from me, but i really do, okay love? you’re the best thing that has happened to me and now it’s time for me to take care of you. you are loved. you are everything anyone could have asked for. you’re perfect in my eyes, and that’s all that matters.” he pauses, giving a kiss on your head. “don’t change yourself to impress someone, okay? you’re already beautiful enough, don’t change. please. for me.”

this time, sunghoon was crying. he really didn’t want you to see those girls and compare yourself to them. you were so perfect to him.

you felt wet droplets falling on your head, you looked up and saw your boyfriend crying. “hoon..” you frowned. sunghoon only shakes his head, not wanting you to continue. “i love you y/n, okay? i love you for who you are. i wish you could see yourself the way i see you.”

sunghoon wipes his tears away. you could only give him a small smile and nod at him. a way to let him know that everything will be okay. “im sorry hoon for letting you find out like this.” you said.

“no don’t be sorry honey. it’s better to know what’s wrong than not knowing anything. you scared me baby, whenever you didn’t answer anyone. i thought i’ve lost you.” he laughed a little, pecking your lips.

you fell asleep in his arms, feeling safe. as sunghoon knew how to make yourself feel better about yourself.

end.

it was the summer you and niki had started dating. his friends always wanted to meet you in person, but niki didn’t want you to meet them yet, scared they’ll get too attached to you. you always called him crazy for thinking that way, and told him you’ll always love him, no matter what.

until school had opened back up after summer break. students were dreading, walking into school like zombies after ruining their sleeping schedule. and then waking up after an hour of sleep.

however, you and niki were too excited to start your junior year together.

you two waiting for his friends, jumping up and down.

“jake hyung! heeseung hyung!” niki yelled out. you looked towards his direction and saw who you assumed, his friends. “ayee niki” heeseung greeted him. you looked at jake and could tell he barely slept.

“where’s the others?” niki asked. before heeseung could respond, you hear another voice call out his name. “niki!”

you faced where the voice came from and you let go of nikis hands to hug the boy. “sunoo!” you yelped. sunoo gave you his signature smile and patted your back. “hi y/n” he laughed.

right, sunoo has been your long time best friend since middle school. but he never told you he was friends with niki, nor did niki tell you about sunoo. but you didn’t mind because sunoo was here!

“give me back my girlfriend.” niki said, more in a demanding tone. this is how jake woke up mentally, the word ‘girlfriend’. he knew you were niki’s girlfriend, but how could you be so pretty, and perfect. a sight of an angel.

as sunghoon and jay arrived, niki introduced you to them. “my girlfriend, y/n” he smiled and giggled, the thought of finally introducing you to his friends and calling you his.

the group welcomed you into the enhypen family, more as so jake quietly stood there. half tired, half wanting to have you.

the days continued where jake would always stare at you and niki. sunghoon kept noticing his behavior, repeatedly asking the boy what’s wrong. jake shook his head, “i’ll text it to you” and left the boy at the table.

“i like y/n, and i want to break them apart”

sunghoon gasped at the table, gathering everyone’s attention, especially yours. “what happened?” you asked. “n-nothing! i mean my sister just texted me saying she’s not feeling well so be right back!” sunghoon left the table to meet up with jake.

“jake, what the fuck? are you really gonna do this? don’t you want niki to be happy?” sunghoon yelled at jake. jake took a breather. “you don’t understand. she’s the girl of my dreams. i love her so much. imagine the things i can do with her. fulfilling her dream dates.” he paused.

“remember when she said she always wanted to go on an amusement park date? but niki said he’ll have to see because tickets are expensive right now? the look on her face when he said that. he can never fulfill her dreams.”

sunghoon was in disbelief. he remembered the time you had asked niki that specific question and the answer. you appreciated the effort niki had brought into your relationship so it didn’t matter to you if you didn’t go or not. you just wanted to be with niki.

“i don’t think you understand, jake. she loves niki with all her heart. you cant possibly break them up.”

jake had enough of sunghoons words. anger was shown. “just watch.”

it was finals week, the week where some students want to get the testing done to finally be on break, others staying up late to study. and you were the others

because you and niki didn’t have physics together, you had asked jake to come over and help you understand more of the certain subject. niki was okay with it since he knew jake.

but since that night, you two became unbelievably close. after the week was over, niki kept trying to take you out on dates, you said yes but you had to make it short. telling niki you have to meet up with jake for some old reason.

niki never questioned you because he trusted you.

-

rumors said you had fallen out of love. the campus saw how you and jake were too friendly with each other, but then seeing you and niki together the next day.

everyone was confused on if you broke up with niki or not. but soon the rumors were starting to affect you mentally. you started distancing yourself from everyone, including your own boyfriend. you took a small break from school and closed the doors from the world.

multiple calls from the boys and your friends and you wanted to shut down your phone. before you did, jake sent a picture.

jake <:

1 attachment

im so sorry bubs, but i think you should look at this

the picture was niki with another girl. you took a small break for your mental health and niki is out with another girl? and he bleached his hair? you guys didn’t even break up and he already—

your mind went blank and you just fell asleep with tears streaks. and niki standing outside of your door, waiting for you in the cold.

you took another week off and you went back. everyone was excited to see you. including jake. you just smiled at everyone and tried to look for niki.

you ran into your home room and saw him alone, working on a piece of paper and your name on top of the paper. he was doing your homework for you? you heart swelled and the thought of him cheating on you went away for a bit.

but when it was time for lunch, your movements were very slow since you still wernt mentally ready. niki quickly got up from his chair and ran to you. “hi my love” he smiled. you looked up and saw your favorite snack. “konon got this for you to cheer you up.” you smiled slightly and left the room with him. with jake following you two behind.

you sat at the table alone, waiting for niki to come back with your lunches. your mind suddenly felt dizzy and the image of niki and the girl together made you feel sick.

niki came back and saw that you were just playing with your. “baby, what’s wrong?” he could tell that you distanced yourself from him and it made him scared. he thought the rumors weren’t true and denied them. but after seeing you quiet, he didn’t know anymore.

tears fell off, you couldn’t take it anymore. “you, cheated on me?” nikis eyes widen. you took out your phone and showed him the picture sent from jake. “babe, that’s from years ago? i literally had blonde hair ever since we’ve dated what are you talking about?”

he did have a point, but still. he said you were his first girlfriend and never told you about his past. “lets break up.” everyone gasped. including niki himself. “y/n wait, you’re not gonna let me explain!” he yelled across the cafeteria, which where you was at.

you ignored him, tears already falling as you tried to find jake around campus. niki was already defeated, being held and comforted by sunghoon, who had mentally hated jake for this. all this just so he could have him.

you couldn’t find jake anywhere so you went to the school garden to think what happened earlier. ‘this is all my fault’ you told yourself. you should’ve let him explained himself. all these thoughts ran through your mind that you didn’t hear someone running towards you, calling your name.

“y/n!”

they waved their hand in front of you,  you looked up and saw jake. you stood up and hugged him, “jake, i-“ “dont talk, its okay to cry right now” he said, patting your back.

since then, you two became close. since he was in a friend group with your ex, you still let him hang out with them. jake wasnt too sure about it, but you reassured him.

one day, jake has surprised you with tickets to the amusement park. you were happy, very. but your smiled soon disappeared when memories of you and niki came in. the one with you asking him if he wanted to go since it was a seasonal thing. but being in a new country and saving up to pay for bills, he had to object. he didnt want to, but you respected his choices. he always promised you that one day, youll have a date there.

but now youre here, with jake. you two went everywhere, jake won you lots of plushies, and the last of it was the ferris wheel. while on top, jake sat across from you, holding your hand. “y/n” he called out. you forced yourself from staring at the at the beautiful scenery.

“i like you”

your eyes widen. you werent too sure if you were ready for a relationship, after breaking up with niki nearly 9 months ago. but you wanted to feel loved and worth. and you had been growing feelings for jake too. “i like you too jake” you smiled.

you two shared your first kiss on top of the wheel, as fireworks show began to show.

the day you two walked into school together with intertwined hands, everyone gasped, especially niki and sunghoon. niki left the table with sunoo following along, and sunghoon was just in shock. he never knew jake would actually pull you away from niki.

“congrats!” jay was the first to say, then everyone followed him. you and jake walked to get breakfast together as everyone talked. “when did this happen?” “9 months already? she already moved on that quick.” “dont talk behind their backs” niki came in. his eyes red but he knew he had to move on. “you okay niki?” he nodded his head and and sat down, seeing you and jake all lovely together. he just had to accept it.

jake was everything you could ask for. he brought you to your dream dates, everything. all the late night city drives, you were more than grateful for him.

but when he suddenly stood you up on your date, you were confused. he never missed a date you questioned yourself. you paid for you bill and left, bumping into jay and sunghoon. “hi!” you waved at them. “what are you two up to?” “were just having a walk. you?” “oh uh, i was waiting for jake but he never came, so i’m gonna go over to his house to make sure he’s alive” you giggled.

jay side eyed sunghoon, ‘oh no’ he thought. “aight well, we gotta go y/n, see you later?” you nodded and left them, driving up to jake’s house.

when you rang the doorbell, layla ran to the front door, trying to unlock the door for you. you smiled, “layla, tell jake to open the door please.” after you said that, the door opened with a surprised look. “what are you doing here?” jake asked. you frowned, “our date that you forgot?”

“oh” was all he could say. he didnt know what to say. he would admit that hes seeing someone else, but he couldnt when he wanted to. there was no way he was going to be like niki, but niki didnt cheat actually. “can i at least come see layla?” you asked, tears brimming. jake sighed and shook his head. “im sorry-“ “youre seeing someone arent you?”

he quickly denied, but you got the same vibes when you knew niki was cheating on you all over again, but its jakes turn. “youre just turning into niki” you paused. “thank you for healing me jake.” you bitterly smiled. you walked away from his porch as he saw your tears finally streaming down. this is all his fault.

jake walked back inside and hugged layla. “i fucked up didnt i layla?” as layla rested her head on his arm. he cried all night, rethinking his choices.

he told the girl to stop seeing him. he really broke your heart again.

the next day, jake saw you walking to your locker, eyes all red and puffy. all because of him. “y/n.” you turned around and saw him, you didnt want to see him, after you knew what he was doing behind your back. “i have to go” you quickly got your books and left him. heeseung saw and ran to grab the boy. comforting him. “shes better alone jake” he told him. jake nodded, crying onto the olders shoulders.

“i loved her so much” heeseung nodded his head.

as school ended, you saw sunoo and niki together. you smiled at them and quickly went to your car. suddenly hearing rushed footsteps, you felt someones arms hugging you from behind. “i know what i did wrong and im so sorry. please y/n. ill love you more than him. niki. please i love you so much.” you turned around and saw jake begging.

“dont ever say you were better than niki. if you didnt make the rumors of him cheating on me, this wouldnt have happened! he would never do this to me. now please leave me alone jake.” he was about to say something until sunghoon stopped him. jake sighed, knowing this is his last time with you.

before he could head back to his car, he saw sunghoon jumping into your car, being there for you. and turned back and saw niki looking at him, smirking with his arms cross.

jake rolled his eyes and entered his car. he broke down when he saw a picture of the two of you on his speed-meter. he just lost the most precious human being in his life, and theres no way he could get you back.

end.

"you? accuse me for cheating? look at you! you probably slept with sunghoon! you fucking slut who told you to talk to other guys?" he spat on you. tears formed in your eyes but you tried not falling in front of him, especially since you wanted this.

his toxicity to this relationship was overwhelming you. you caught him cheating and everytime you tried to talk to him about you, you ended up in his bed.

you now had sense of your future and wanted it to end, actually now. you couldn't believe how your younger self didn't see this before. jake was the purest and loving guy you met, you didn't know what went wrong.

but everytime you just thought about it, the more insecure you got. you felt overwhelmed and tired at the thought it was merely your fault. but then again, you also fell for the fuck boy.

"remember who you're talking to y/n. you say shit that's not even true. you talk as if they know about us. they don't even know most of the things we've done. have some bit of sympathy, heartless bitch."

you stood up for yourself and decided to end things now. you were strong and for sure you wanted this. "there's no 'next time' jake. you realized i've stayed with you because i actually loved you? i fought with all my family and friends to defend you. i should've listened to them." you tsked. "i fucking hate you jake sim."

"fucking bitch, this is your fault that you fell for me." and with that he left you. finally.

for the first time in three years, you actually felt lonely. you had nobody to lean on but jake. oh how were you supposed to see layla now.

you leaned onto your desk chair, knees in front of your chest. you looked up and saw a picture of you, jake, and layla in the middle on your wall. you smiled as a tear escaped your eye. "you don't miss him." you kept reminding yourself.

your eyes kept watering as you wondered everywhere around your house. memories of you and jake when you both were in love. you had enough. you got up and dressed up for the bar that was a few minutes away from your neighborhood. you needed to get things out of your mind anyways.

you grabbed your belongings and entered the bar, immediately heading to get a drink. you refused to talk to anyone who came up to you, after all, you needed a drink. that's all.

one shot became 5, then 10, then 50 eventually. you laid your head on the counter, sobbing. you missed him. you still don't know what happened but you were dying to know.

you stayed there until the bar closed. they had dialed sunghoons number as his contact was blowing up your phone, asking if you were okay after jake told him everything was okay.

sunghoon came in an instant, apologizing for you about your behavior. he had dropped you off your house and as much as he wanted to take the couch in the living room to take care of you when you wake up, he couldn't.

he didn't want jake or anyone to find out that he was at your home. he sighed, as he place pain killers and a glass of water next to you, as well as a note.

stay safe, y/n

hoon :)

when he got back home, he didn't realize his roommate standing in front of the front door with his arms crossed and a distressed look on him. jake woke up from sunghoons ringtone, indicating that it was you specifically. he had different ringtones for all of his contacts.

usually jake isn't home, he's either always at some other girls house or yours, which is why he was on the floor of sunghoons room, venting about you how you were the schools most wanted slut. how everyone wanted you for your body.

sunghoon never wanted to punch his best friend so bad. you were literally the most beautiful and innocent girl on campus. you were insecure with your body so you always hid it with oversized clothing.

but as his phone rang, he heard sunghoons rushed footsteps to the front door, grabbing his keys. after he heard the front door shut, he stood up. is everything okay?

he demeanor changed seconds after. why is he even worried about you when you wanted to break up in the first place.

when sunghoon arrived, he was worried once again. "is she okay?" he asked. sunghoon nodded, patting jakes back. telling him it was nothing and to go back to sleep. "you fucked her didn't you?" he yelled out. sunghoon stepped back, eyes wide open.

"what? why would i-" "i don't know, maybe because she broke up with me because i knew you guys were seeing each other behind my back." jake screamed in front of his next friend. "watch what you're saying. you cant say shit when youre the one cheating on her. she found out and couldn't do anything because you didn't even let her talk to me! her own damn family who's still beside her even when she chose you."

"i hope you know that this is your fault. don't ever blame her for anything. i want your stuff out of here."

two different sides of the cities, you were left alone but sunghoon had came by to gift you a little pet of your dream. even after the confrontation with jake, he knew jake still didn't want him to be around you.

sunghoon apologized for not being able to be with you physically, but he told you that he's just a call away.

you still drank your feelings away, but now that you have a little one following you everywhere, you cut most of it off, only putting your health, your puppy and school as your priority.

however jake, he went around to mess with more girls. he was now sure that you were fine. he heard you didn't need him anymore. he stood in front of your house to see if you'll just walk out and bump into him. but as time passes by, you never did.

you only left your house only at the darkest time and only when you needed to. you switched to online school to avoid threats and crowds at school and to avoid jake. he waited everyday fo see your text, saying you want him back.

but as months passes, you finally learned to move on with someone new. someone who treated you much better than jake. someone who wasn't so possessive. and that's when jake realizes, he fucked up.

your best friend who you once loved was now a stranger to you. a toxic psycho who was possessive over you. what do you even call him now?

end.

you snuck into one of jakes frat parties, after he told you he couldn't hang out and did a rain check on your date. you felt unsteady.

your friend, sunghoon, had texted you. asking if you had a date with jake today. 'he canceled on me today :(' you replied. next thing you saw was a photo of a girl on jakes lap.

you got up and got dressed up to visit one of the fraternities house on campus, thoughts running in your head. you felt dizzy, you' wanted to throw up

and he was right. the girl was still on him, attaching her lips to his neck.

the day after, jake came over to your house first thing in the morning. you wanted to stay in bed and thought about all the feedback you received after you told your friends about you and jake as a newly couple.

you placed your arms above your eyes, a few tears running down. you felt your bed dip on the empty spot next to you. "you okay?" he asked. you wanted to say no. and tell him what you saw last night, but you didn't want him to know. "yes" you replied.

your head hurted like crazy, rhe sudden rush of tears ran through and you sobbed into jakes chest. he held you close, patting your head. as if no other girl was on him less than 12 hours ago.

jake had been avoiding you for the past weeks now. always refusing to see you, refusing to do anything, yet he always lies awake with a different girl with him in bed.

sunghoon had monitored the blonde guy ever since he saw him cheating the first place, yet he still doesn't know why you're still with him.

you were left home alone, crying at the fact that you're now doing this. you're finally breaking up with him.

jake had woken up at an unreasonable hour, having the sudden feeling to text you. before he could press on your contact, his screen was indicating that you were calling.

"hi y/n!-"

"come over"

he quickly got dressed and left his house, happy to see you. but when he knocked on your door and opened it, he saw your head buried in your knees. "y/n-" you looked up at him. eyes red and puffy.

his eyes softened and walked up to you, but you stopped him. "let's break up." you said bitterly. tsk. jake thought. "baby, you cant get rid of me that easily" he smirked. he walked up to you and almost placed his lips on your neck but you harshly pushed him away.

"yo!" he shouted. "i said let's break up!" you screamed at him. "i saw you, sunghoon saw you, cheating on me. 3 times now." at this point, jake was mad angry. "so you're talking to other boys behind my back now?" he bent down to your level. "i didn't say you were allowed to talk to boys, did i baby?"

you smacked him across the face, tired of whoever this person is in front of you. "s-shut the fuck up. you cant control me." physical touch and words he didn't like? oh he saw red.

"stop being so fucking insecure. you probably slept with sunghoon didn't you? that's why you're accusing me of cheating." he walked your way, backing you up against the wall. "you whore, always thinking you can get passed me" he lifted your face up, staring straight to his eyes.

"i cant believe i dated someone like you. accusing me of cheating when you're sleeping with some other boys. i think you're the cheater here. we're breaking up." he grabbed his belongings, whispering insults to you.

tears fell as he blamed you for everything, shutting the door closed shut. you felt sick, fell to your knees and wish you saw this sooner.

as the days passed, you thought you would've handled the breakup well. but you realized you didn't have anyone to talk to anymore. all your friends left you after you chose jake over them, and you would usually tell jake your problems. you and sunghoon aren't that close so you had nobody.

you wanted to feel so free now that he was gone. so you got up and got dressed, did your makeup and went to the bar across the street from you.

you ignored all the guys asking you questions and sitting next to you. it didnt feel right, now that jake was no longer yours. he can go fuck someone else now. but you had let him go to find happiness for yourself.

but also after he called you names.

it was now 4 am and you were drowned by the alcohol you've consumed. you fell asleep on the counter, not moving after the barista had poked you many times.

you felt your body being pulled, holding you bridal style. half asleep, half awake but mostly asleep, you subconsciously wrapped your arms around them. "i missed you jake"

as your body hit your soft bed, sunghoon felt sad for you. your room was a mess, he had his sister help your drunk sleepy self take off your makeup and got you in more comfortable clothes. he couldn't help but let a few tears fall as he realized you've lost so much weight during this road to recovery. dark eye bags, and puffiness. he left you a glass of water next to your nightstand before he left you alone in your room.

as the morning came upon, you woke up wincing. the headache banging through your skull. "agh" you quickly screamed.

but you suddenly remembered jake. you opened your eyes and looked everywhere for him, but he was nowhere found in your room. you went to the main area and screamed when you saw sunghoon sleeping on your couch.

"sunghoon!" you screamed. he tumbled down your small couch. he got up and saw your distressed self. "what are you doing here?" you asked him. "what were you doing at the bar at 4 am?" you stayed silent. so jake didn't actually pick you up? you quietly went back to your bedroom.

sunghoon followed you, "hey! what's wrong?" he asked you. you couldn't help but cry. how could you miss somebody who had cheated on you more than two times and called you names. "you miss him, don't you?" you nodded. sunghoon sighed. how was he going to tell you jake missed you too?

you haven't showed up to campus in a hot while, making your old friends worried, especially jake. when he left, he realized his mistake. he knew he was wrong for cheating on you and being caught in 4k. he was wrong for calling you names. wrong for calling out your insecurities.

he went home and saw the picture of you two on your first date on the floor, glass broken. ah, he forgot about that. he accidentally bumped into the frame while he was busy making out with the girl he brought home.

jake bent down and picked up the picture, some glass piercing into his skin. and that's when he broke down. he saw how genuinely happy you were.

he hasn't had any parties in a while, he didn't bring girls home. but he didn't want to show that he was broken from this break up. after all, he did ask for it.

he acted tough during school, but when he got inside the comfort of his home, he fell to his knees. memories of you everywhere.

your friends knew something was wrong when they saw jakes cold face walking into the classroom without you for days. they tried contacting you but you probably deleted their numbers after what happened.

"jake, where's your girlfriend?" they went up to him. he rolled his eyes. "her name is y/n. and do not refer her as my girlfriend again."

but, jake couldn't keep it anymore. he heard from others that sunghoon had been helping you since then. "that should be me." he thought.

he knew he was toxic and possessive to you. but he couldn't control it. he wanted you for him only. he doesn't know what made him switch up when he had brought girls home, knowing damn well you were still his.

since that day, he thought you were doing fine. but he's been hearing rumors saying you were at the risk of getting hospitalized for drinking too much and losing your little cute baby cheeks he loved to squish all the time. this is all his fault.

you laid in bed, unmotivated for anything once again. sunghoon had brought in soup and snacks every once in awhile, only to find out you haven't ate anything. you felt bad, appreciating his gesture. but you didn't want to do anything at all.

this time, sunghoon had brought a stop to this unending sadness. he called jake, telling him to hurry up to your house. he told him every detail about you.

jake had entered your house and gave a little wave to sunghoon and he silently walked into your room. oh how he wanted to cry from the moment he walked in.

your untouched food on your desk and your little figure hiding underneath the blankets, just a few hair stands sticking out. it looked like you were barely breathing.

he carefully picked up your blanket and slid under it, hugging your cold figure. he saw red stains on your cheeks and your puffy under eyes. your almost boney cheeks. he pulled you closer, planting a kiss on your head.

"jake?" you whispered, no energy to speak up. he looked down to where your face is, "yes baby, i'm right here" he nodded, wiping your tears that threaten to fall. "im here my love."

end.

during your short relationship, you always made the effort to come comfort him when he felt his lowest. you had brought color into his cold nights. and he was very thankful for that.

he never had anyone as sweet and much better until you came in. the day you walked into your new school, your hair was curled slightly and your uniform was stunning on you. he saw you as the goddess. he wanted you.

the short days while you were at school, you had received a letter in your backpack while you were cleaning it at home.

' please call me - jake '

and after that, you two were unseparable. all the late nights talking to each other to ice cream dates. you always got to see layla which made you really happy. and that's when jake knew it, he was in love.

he confessed to you under the cherry blossom trees that were almost done blooming. the undying love for him, you also confessed. sharing your first kiss.

but things took a turn from there. he was becoming less affectionate. leaving you hanging in the dust at the restaurants you had your daily dates at. your love was dying.

you called it quits a few days before your anniversary together. you didn't want to be in a relationship with a guy like him.

so the night you had left his house, layla was whimpering for you to come back and give her all the hugs she could possibly get from you. but jake only went back to continue his game. he didn't care at all, you were just a toy to him. he played with your feelings and that's all he cared about.

but as you were walking around the city of seoul to release your anger at the fact that he didn't give a fuck, you felt someone follow you. you looked back and saw nobody.

you opened your phone and had jakes contact open. just in case something happened. you saw a convenience store a few meters away, so you tried to make a run for it. but before you could run, someone had covered your eyes and was pulled into darkness.

jake did receive a call from you after you were kidnapped, but he thought of it as if you wanted him back already. "piece of shit." he tsk. he silent his phone and went on his night, leaving behind the fact that that was his fault for not saving you in the first place.

the next day he expected you to walk into class, dreadful. eyes all red from crying, messy hair. but, you didn't even show up- at all for the past 3 days. during lunch time, he went up to your friends, asking if they knew anything. but of course, they didn't answer after what you had told them about your relationship.

nobody knew where you were or what happened. you were still enrolled in this school but where could you be?

the last time he heard from you was that phone call that night. where he heard laylas paws hitting the front door, wanting you to come back inside. he grabbed his phone from his bag and turned on his phone. 12 messages and 2 missed calls from you.

y/n <3

if you want her back, meet up here. you have 72 hours.

*sent photo*

he wanted to cry. scream. all the above. jake dropped his phone at the photo they had sent. you were tied hands together on a chair. bruised and cuts evident.

he gathered all his belongings and went to the location. he really hoped he wasn't too late.

he ran inside sweating, desperately needing to find you. he heard shuffling in an abandoned building and saw you. tears blinding you. rope tied to your mouth. "y/n" jake breathed out.

he was running towards you to help you until someone knocked you down with the chair, definitely giving a bruise on your arm. whimpering in pain and shook your head to jake, giving him a sign to not get closer.

"hello there pretty boy. you're a few seconds late i see" he turned around and saw the guy who had planned this all along. lee heeseung, also known as the bad guy reputation at school. his biggest enemy. heeseung had always gotten what he wanted, and he finally did.

"what do you want from me" jake yelled out. to be honest, he didn't want anything from the younger. he just wanted to mess with him, just like how jake played with you.

"two choices sim. you give me what i want and she's all yours. or i," he paused, clutching his gun. "shoot your lover."

you looked over at the boys aruging. but you couldn't do anything, you were hungry and dehydrated and all dirty from heeseung. all you could do is cry while the boys fight.

however, you saw heeseung had enough of jakes antics. it felt like it was all in slow motion. heeseung pointed the gun at jake, almost pulling the trigger until you had successfully untangled yourself from the chair and weakly got up, taking the bullet for jake.

everything seemed to happen way too quickly for jake. he caught your body in his hands, not realizing what happened. you felt light and thin and he wanted to cry. this is all his fault.

heeseung had ran away from the scene, leaving you and jake alone. "j-jake, my baby" you weakly called him out. jake couldn't help but let streams of tears away. "shhh, don't talk y/n. you're going to survive okay?" you shook your head. you felt the bullet pierce through the important fuction organ, the heart.

you looked into your lovers eyes, feeling gloomy. he used to look at you with the most hated stares at you. but now you look into the eyes of the once sparkle filled ones when he saw you. "i love you, my baby." was all you could say.

your last breath and you wasted it on an idiot like him. "no no no" he yelled out. he heard the ambulance sirens so he quickly carried you to the van.

"she was unable to be saved." was what haunted him. this is all his fault. if he wasn't so worked up because of the break up, he would've saved you just in time.

he stayed in bed all day, all night. just hoping you'll come in his room with layla following behind you. wishing he didn't use you, because he actually did have feelings for you, genuinely.

he distanced himself because he was working hard to get you the ring you deserved. but now, he holds the ring in the box, sobbing into his pillow. he had his lover die in his arms and he couldn't do anything.

layla had a feeling you weren't coming back. she always came into his room, comforting the boy. jake wished this never happened. because all the things you had said about your future with him. you could've been growing old together, have kids and more dogs so layla can play with. and love each other until your very last breathes. and you did love him until your last breathe.

jake felt lost. he misses you. he wishes he did everything better. he wished that he gave heeseung what he wanted so that you could be safe in his arms.

he's missing you like crazy. but knowing life, he can't do anything about it.

end.