Guilty Pleasures

Just a random thought I’m at work right now. It’s October 7… ber months already! When you’re Filipino, you can already feel the Christmas spirit slowly coming in.

Hmm, nothing much really I just felt like writing today hahaha. I’m in front of my PC reading some emails and explanations from our employees. At the same time, I’m thinking about plans and dreams while listening to Jason Mraz (I need his energy and vibe right now it’s exactly what keeps me grounded)

It’s funny how I’m already thinking about my future self where I’ll be working, who I’ll be surrounded with, whether I’ll still be here in Cebu or living on another island in the Philippines ahhahaha. Just some random thoughts about my “game plan” and wondering if it will actually manifest someday.

But honestly, I’m excited. Slowly, I’m getting back into my hobbies - relearning, focusing more, and improving my craft. It might just be a hobby, but it’s been helping me a lot lately. It’s giving me hope again that maybe I can find work that truly aligns with what I love.

First Half Marathon | SM2SM RUN

One of the reasons I participated in the SM2SM Fun Run was to commemorate and celebrate my commitment to running. I may not be consistent at times, but compared to my old self, this is by far the most active version of me I've ever met.

I decided to indulge myself in this kind of activity for mental clarity, not realizing that it would also benefit my physical health. I was diagnosed with PCOS back in 2022, which prompted me to change my lifestyle, including my food intake and physical activities. After becoming more physically active and spending more time outdoors, my cycle began to improve.

Now, I want to challenge myself further by aiming to run a half marathon. This isn’t just about proving to myself that I can do it (with the help of my strong support system), but also about celebrating being a woman and appreciating the health I've gained by consistently showing up for myself. It wasn’t easy—but it was all worth it. *taps shoulder you did a great job!

Congratulations to all the runners! It truly was a FUN RUN!

(I said a little prayer to be consistent at something — little did I know I would slowly start committing to this kind of activity.)

xoxo, Jo Alba ♡

I met my younger self for coffee today She was late for thirty minutes, I showed up dressed in an office outfit.

She ordered a Hot chocolate latte, I got a carrot cake and a hot latte.

She was afraid to go out alone it makes her anxious, I told her I enjoyed my solitude now and I'm quite enjoying it.

She thinks that saying NO will hurt other people's feelings, but I told her that it's acceptable to say NO and YES to yourself..

She asked me if we made it, I told her yes at some point (layu pa, pero layu layu napud)and I shared with her the courageous decisions I made and the ambitions I fulfilled on my bucket list, the places I've always wanted to see and the foods I wanted to try.

She was so confused on what career path to take, I told her that I was slowly rediscovering my passion for arts and creation.

She likes to ask questions, so I answered it all.

She will be surprised that I have a new dream.

Reading

-Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho

Writing

-I've written something on my journal.

Listening

-Jazz music for babies (really a relaxing background music while writing 💯)

Smelling

-Nothing, I mean no scent just the usually homey scent...

Hoping

-To be hired especially in the creative department. I really hope there's a chance to make it to the designing world.

Wearing

-My sleeping attire since it's 7am ahahah yah writing this at this very moment while basking the feeling of morning feeling. 😴😂

Loving

-That I am actually writing something right now.

Wanting

-To have a stable income. Pleaseeeeeeee (so many things to pay and things to BUYYYY 💸 ahahahah the gastador self is screaming! )

Needing

-Enough time and faith to hold on to my dream. TBH, I'm so tired of waiting the "waiting game" is really challenging as of the moment. I don't have any resources anymore (money) and I tried freelancing but there's a slight chance to be able to work with clients nowadays especially there's so many GREAT DESIGNER in the market. I just gotta keep on reminding myself that I can do this and if not I can still and will be doing DESIGNING no matter what. It's so clear to me what I really wanna do especially with the phasing of my life right now. I just really wanna create even if I suck sometimes.

Feeling

Reading

The Untethered Soul 

Writing

Nothing much

Listening

Television sounds...

Smelling

Buwad from the kitchen.

Wishing

That I will be more courageous with the things I do.

That I won’t stress the small stuff.

Hoping

I won’t consume something that is not healthy online. 

That things will be okay soon. I know it will be. I hope I will be strong enough and brave enough to conquer everything what’s in front of me. 

Wearing

Pangbahay clothes.

Loving

That I was slowly breaking the bad patterns and being aware of my bad behaviours. 

Wanting

To feel connected again with someone. I know that I’m blessed with family and friends. But to be honest, these past few months it’s been a very challenging to connect with the random people. I feel like I’ve been distant with my family. And my friends they too have their priorities (completely understandable) Or I'm just having sepanx with the people around me and at some point they’re slowly settling down with their life and with their own little family. Just wanna connect lang jud with people. Like random chikas and random bonding ughhhhh. 

Needing

CONNECTION! genuine connection. ahahaha lol self. Just let if flow jo, just let it flow. 

A real conversation, there’s this one person I met online and ever since our last conversation I still crave for it. I feel safe at some point when I talk to him though we have a naughty conversation, but with other stuff you can feel that he is listening to you. In time, I don’t know if we will ever meet in real person. I still don’t know. But I think it is not impossible to meet someone whom you can connect with whether its online of offline. (but more of the offline pls. hahahaah)

Feeling

Reading

Conversations with God by Naele Donald

Writing

Done writing my other blog post, Still gonna brainstorm another blogpost ;)

Listening

Double Take by Dhruv

Thinking

Going to a bookstore today... 

About my pre covid travels

Smelling

Coffee 

Wishing

This pandemic will hopefully calm down, like mo chill lng mga taw slight.

Everything will work out for the best.

Better days ahead.

Hoping

That things will be okay.

That whatever is happening to our society will be an eye opener.

Wearing

Pangbahay clothes.

Loving

That I will be brainstorming another artwork for house warming.

That at some point I can handle things slowly.

Wanting

To have a food buddy plus laag buddy. (I know I have friends whom I can call, but you know na what I mean hahahaa)

Needing

more disciplined with my finances eheheh 

Feeling

Have you ever felt sometimes that people might leave you? I know not literally but can you imagine that one day things might/will change. The time you're having fun with them, the spontaneous trips you guys have, the food trips and everything in between. Hard pill to swallow but everything is not permanent, change is the only constant. Thinking about this feels like a bittersweet feeling. When you’re “in the moment” with them you just don’t want to end it, it feel so good to be surrounded with good people that everything flows smoothly when you’re with them. This is such an underrated blessing, not all people got to experience this kind of bond with people, when you know they are not just there for fun but also when you are facing defiance. I thank G and the universe for letting me experience this kind of experience. May I always gonna take care and cherish this blessing. With the waves of change and as we grow older we have different priorities now, some of them are pursuing their long time dream, some of them are thinking about settling down, some of them wants to migrate and start a new life in a different place. It is slowly sinking-in that we got to decide and think about long term decision now. Gone are the days that the only concern we have is “guys asa ta laag, asa ta kaon?” LOL kidding aside. But seriously, we talked about “adult” stuff now, it feels weird but at the same time excited about what will happen next with our lives. It’s amazing to think that we can talk these things openly with each other. But deep down while listening to them part of me wants to pause first, like guys can we slow down a little bit? Can we take a little time to breathe? But this is life, we got to experience every phases of it and how we deal with the changes that is happening right in front of us. That’s the beauty of this we got to witness ourselves and the people around us mature and grow. The things we hope and planned before is actually happening right now, right in this moment. Yes, we have dreams and plans to achieve but that doesn’t mean the fun stops already, it is just that we have our own dreams and desires to pursue. And as we go on and think about what will happen next why not cherish the chances and bonds you guys have while you’re still having that moment. For me, I really don’t know what will happen next. But as we go on I just hope everything that we decide what to do with our lives will align to what’s meant for us. Upon thinking that people might leave me, I think I was just eaten up by my anxiety and fear. Because honestly, I think they will not. I know who to call and share my sentiments with and I’m always gonna be forever grateful about this (and vice versa). Always gonna cheer for them and support their decisions in life. Well, for me? I still don’t know what to focus and I’ still figuring things out. But deep down I know what things that I wanna do I’m going there guys, slowly but surely...

XOXO,