but sometimes there are secrets trying to understand people
@isfjmel-phleg
Rebekah. English major, history minor, MA in English. ILL/cataloging assistant at a Baptist university library. Hypothetically a writer but mostly just a ranter. Sometimes I post about my writing, but this blog is mostly personal stuff and random (usally literary) interests. About the Annotated Psmith Project: From approximately 2013-18, I very informally annotated P. G. Wodehouse's Psmith series, most of his school stories, and a few Blandings, Jeeves, and standalone stories or novels with the intention of providing context and analysis. For personal reasons, this project is suspended for now, and the outdated annotations have been taken down. I may revisit this someday but not in the near future, although I welcome questions and discussion of Psmith anytime. This is NOT an MBTI blog, though I may occasionally address the subject, usually as it pertains to certain literary characters. This is a clean blog; I want everyone to feel comfortable viewing it. If you have any comments or genuine questions, the askbox is always open. Thank you for stopping by!
You may have seen me post about something called The Blackberry Bushes. That's my WIP. Though that title has become less relevant to the actual stories as the stories and characters have evolved over the last twenty or so years, it's stuck around. So what are these stories actually about?
In a fictional world reminiscent of Europe around the turn of the twentieth century, we follow the lives and adventures of seven young protagonists:
Rachel Doncath, nervous wreck who's never had a solid sense of home or friends thanks to growing up in a military family
Rietta Valencourt, teenage queen of a major nation, kept in isolation by her adamantly protective mother until she reaches her majority
Delclis Phemister, socially awkward botany nerd who would prefer to ignore the fact that he technically has a claim to his country's throne through the father he never met
Elystan Liddick, Delclis's half-brother, annoying little jerk, and the current heir to the throne--if he can survive to grow up
Amarantha Melbray, daughter of Elystan's nurse, dedicated aspiring artist, too serious for her own good, and deeply resentful of the boy who has monopolized her mother her entire life
Josiah Callon, elder son and heir of an ambitious and image-conscious king, raised to embody perfection and is obnoxiously good at it--until he isn't
Tamett Låsrygg (Lockridge), paid companion to the crown prince (Josiah) of a nation that long ago conquered his, might not be able to keep up the facade of dutiful compliance much longer
As much as I love researching this mostly historically-based world, the characters are the centerpiece of the stories--their growth, their relationships. These are stories about isolation and longing for connection, about family dynamics--good, bad, and complicated, about the tension between responsibility/expectations and personal inclinations, about how people are often more than our assumptions make them out to be. I try to present characters' flaws honestly (and some of them are very flawed) while also making them understandable and human.
The tone I'm going for is something that hopefully feels a lot like classic children's stories you might have read growing up.
If this is something you're interested in, here's where you can find what I've posted. None of the intended novels are anywhere near complete, but there are sample chapters and a lot of short stories.
Book 1: A chance foray through a door on the other side of the blackberry bushes in her grandparents’ garden leads Rachel Doncath to meet Rietta, the young queen of Faysmond. As they gradually befriend each other, the differences between the girls create complications that get more out of hand as Rachel gets caught up in the conflicts of Rietta’s life, including dealing with a regency council that is determined to remove Rietta’s mother from the picture and control Rietta further as she nears her majority, while events unfold in the neighboring nation of Corege that unexpectedly leave fourteen-year-old Delclis king.
Chapter One
Chapter Two (potentially subject to revision)
Excerpt from much later: The Boy with the Botanical Box
Book 2: About a year later. Prince Elystan of Corege has ruined Amarantha Melbray’s life. Not only does he monopolize her mother (his nurse), but he also provokes Amarantha to an act that destroys her chances to convince his mother to restore her art school scholarship. But when an unexpected calamity traps Amarantha and Elystan in the same residence, they must work together to unravel the mysteries around them. That is, if they can trust each other. Or anyone else.
Revised Chapter One
Revised Chapter Two
Revised Chapter Three
Revised Chapter Four
Revised Chapter Five
Revised Chapter Six
Book 3: About a year later. Tamett Låsrygg thinks he's finally got the chance to get out of his much-loathed job as companion to the self-important Prince Josiah. Instead, he ends up not only making Josiah hate him more than ever but also getting shipped out to Corege to accompany him to boarding school--and to spy on him. There, he meets Elystan, former prince with a massive grudge against his remaining family, and shenanigans ensue.
The present chapters are experimental and subject to future change.
Chapter One
Chapter Two
A Christmas Chapter (Tamett’s POV)
A Christmas Chapter (Josiah’s POV)
A Christmas Chapter (Elystan’s POV)
A Christmas Chapter (Herrich Böllingfurt's POV)
Book 4: About a year later. Delclis’s story. Otherwise, who even knows.
Pre-Book 1 short stories:
Constellation of Six (six-year-old Josiah's relationship with his family)
Prequel scene for Book 2 (Amarantha meets Elystan)
Seeing the Elephant (dynamic between ten-year-old Delclis and his stepfather)
A Building Project (eleven-year-old Delclis and seven-year-old Elystan build a blanket fort)
The Other Side of the Door (tension between thirteen-year-old Rietta and the daughter of the head of her regency council)
In a Nutshell (Elystan sneaks into a Halloween party he wasn't invited to and has a talk with Delclis)
Book 1 short stories:
Horrid Old Beautiful Ruin (Rietta and her mother vs. the Regency Council)
Over the Boundary Wall (Rietta, shortly after Book 1 Chapter One)
Book 1 Chapter One from Rietta's POV
Venturing In (Rietta and Rachel bonding, at some point in Book 1)
Book 2 short stories:
Early Morning Tea (tension between Amarantha and her mother, after Book 2 Chapter One)
Picnic in the Clock Tower (Amarantha and Elystan later in Book 2)
Book 3 short stories:
The Breakfast Room (Delclis and his mother struggle to connect)
Elystan's Infamous Lamplight Letter
A Visit from the Murderess (Elystan's mother pays him a visit at a particularly low point in his life)
Selections from the Correspondence of the Lockridge Family (epistolary story with "historical" footnotes starring Tamett and family) + bonus letter from Emenor
Incognito (Josiah, newly arrived in Corege, chats with commoners who don't know he's a prince)
Elystan meets Morstyn Hollock
Speaking to a Housemaid (Amarantha meets Josiah)
Elystan & Tamett (immediately after the Book 3 Christmas chapters)
Post-Book 3 short stories:
Portrait of the Monarch as a Young Woman (Amarantha meets Antavia, ex-queen of Corege)
Josiah & Emenor (Josiah's last interaction with Tamett's sister)
Delclis & Mikaiah (Delclis accidentally befriends Josiah's little brother)
A Pleasant Talk (twelve-part story in which a young adult Josiah dines with Antavia. PG-rated for alcohol and thematic elements, has more of a grown-up sensibility than the other stories)
Preface to The Captives of the Castle Clock Tower (glimpse into Elystan's future as an author)
For more on the characters: OC facts and OC descriptions.
For answers to asks: Q&A.
For more on the world: Worldbuilding.
For visuals: Art (commissioned works by lovely talented people) and Aesthetics (me fooling around with collages).
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I very much appreciate that in the latest issue of the current JSA series, penciller Diego Olortegui gave appropriately-1940s attire and hairstyles to the younger JSA members when they enter a timeloop from 1940. This isn't just "generically and vaguely old-timey," but suitable to this specific era.
(JSA 2024 #22)
Jim Corrigan (the Golden Age Spectre) and his fiancee Clarice Winston look quite era-appropriate too.
Clarice's design is very different from her appearance in the Golden Age stories, but it's plausible for 1940.
Part 10 of my liveblog of @isfjmel-phleg's "A Pleasant Talk." Today -
PUDDING, CORNELIUS! PUDDING!
- He's as excited about this blanc-mange (it sounds like some kind of blanc-mange? I don't know. I've only seen that English Heritage video about a Victorian recipe for it) as I was over the chocolate pudding with whipped cream and raspberries at the wedding the other night! It is lovely to find a homey and delicious pudding where you do not expect it.
- "And even then I thought it was all propaganda." Propaganda efforts about pudding.
- Actually I can very clearly imagine a scene where Josiah's at Hollingham reading about it in the encyclopedia, and one of the other boys looks over his shoulder and makes some remark. Josiah says haughtily that it's almost certainly propaganda intended to make Faysmond look better and to falsely claim it as Dorinaise haute cuisine, and Elystan has something to howl over for a month. Pudding propaganda.
-"But this cream had been imported straight from his memories onto a plate." And how many joys can compete with that?
- “Even if it’s not my favourite." She had hoped to have hooked him into being her tortured musician by now, or at least to be well on her way to it. I wonder how much strategy might have gone into planning this meal. (I'm sure she also wants to be a gracious hostess and makes sure he enjoys his food, but it's more fun to look for extra motive layers.:-)
- Was it fun researching the courses for this story?
- I just looked up bombe nero, and that does sound more up my alley than the Liennese cream, though with the way I am imagining them, I am sure I could enjoy either.
- It's good Josiah is only half listening - that nursery speech could have been a smack to his insecurities.
- As it is, he's just picking up on individual words. (PLEASE don't drink anything from that buttle of bobbly. I like champagne, and you might have been able to enjoy it if you had only a sip or two with each course - though even that seems a frightful waste, for they'll give you a whole glass. But as it is - please switch to water for the rest of the meal!!)
- Oh, it's not just Liennese cream, and childhood favourite cream. It's Nyella cream.
- This is indeed a story of people who love to duck out of parties. (Except Elystan, who does his best to make up for them all by sneaking into parties he's not supposed to attend.)
-“She was perfect." I'm squeezing your hand to show I care, Josiah.
- Oh, the stargazing. That really remains somewhere near the core of him.
- Oh, Nyella started him on music! Everything's so beautifully layered.
- "A very... supportive person." Squeezing your hand too, Antavia. Both hands are full. Presently Antavia and Josiah will squeeze each others' hands, and we can all sway, and sing "Kumbaya."
- This time he didn't even bother to ask if she was going to eat that. He's too bighearted and misty and maudlin to interrupt with such things - and she might say no again, after all, even though she doesn't like Liennese cream.
- Analytical me: This story, about how he lied to her about practising his scales and never saw her again and intrinsically isn't a good boy even though he tries so hard to be one and to make everyone think he's doing it all right and the shame is eating him bone by bone, is VERY representative of what Josiah's been canying a long time.
- Sympathetic me: Hugs him while he cries.
- Unsympathetic me: Dumps the champagne in the potted palm.
- "I deeply sympathize." She has enjoyed his company much more than he realizes. And this is scarcely odd because - well, see all my comments thus far.
- "Abruptly” - He's getting a little emotional even for her. He's not suffering sufficiently beautifully. He's just sort of drunk and crying, and she's enjoying the emotional closeness, but she's Coregean, after all, and she lives in an era where a man crying in a restaurant to a lady was much too much, and her instincts are uncomfortable -
- but also I don't think her mother thought she was a good child either. And I don't think she ever felt she could live up to expectations. And what do you do when your young friend is crying over the same thing, even though he had a more supportive mother, and though you've been enjoying talking about trauma you don't really want to talk about it quite THAT way, and oh dear, please, please stop crying. There.
- But also, call me Antavia. She does get him, to some degree, and he gets her somewhat too. And they have a lot in common despite appearances, and have shared a great deal. How can she permit him to go on calling her "ma'am." This is like some sort of platonic speedrun of those series of questions that supposedly speedrun the process of falling in love. Speed running emotional vulnerability and understanding. (And, as much as I hate to say it, in vino veritas. Still doesn't make getting drunk a good idea, though.)
- “He cleared his throat and clothed himself in dignity like an opera cloak." Great sentence. (But between you and me, Josiah, just straightening up a little and clearing your throat will not recover all your dignity when you were messily blubbering twenty seconds ago.
- Ah, so he will play for her! (But will he? A lot can happen in two courses!)
"Liennese cream" is a renaming of Bavarian cream, made of custard and gelatin and whipped cream--fairly similar to a blanc-manage. (I've never had either.)
But of course propaganda about pudding! It presents Faysmond as more cultured than it really is and takes away Lienne's rightful creation from them. Josiah has been steeped in a regime that was bent on self-aggrandizing, and he was probably taught as a child to suspect anything that seems to lessen Lienne's glory.
I love that scene idea. It would be fun to work that into something.
Oh, there is definitely strategy in this dinner. Antavia is not the sort of person to invite someone to dine with her just out of the goodness of her heart.
Yes, it was a lot of fun researching! The menu is based on this one from 1900, and the descriptions of the food are informed by recipes from A Guide to Modern Cookery (1903) by French chef Auguste Escoffier.
I'd love to try either dessert, but bombe nero does seem likelier to become a favorite.
Yeah, he might not have become so free with his childhood memories if the snide implications of her remark had fully sunk in.
He's far enough gone that he's not really enjoying the taste of the drinks anymore either. The champagne isn't a flavor to him; it's a sensation.
Nyella's a bit different from the average OC of mine who's overwhelmed by social events in that she's actually a pretty social person who normally would like such events. But it wasn't easy as a very young commoner who married the king so soon after the death of his well-respected and -connected first wife. There were a lot of specific people that she didn't enjoy being around. I suspect that was a factor in her seizing the chance to duck out in this memory of Josiah's.
As we see in "Constellation of Six," Nyella was certainly not perfect. Josiah's idealizing her is a gesture of love stemming from the limited perspective of his childhood, but it's also holding him back. If Nyella was perfect, then he ought to be too, and he can never quite achieve it.
The things that he loves, the things that make him feel most like himself come from Nyella's influence! Which also raises the question of whether he loves astronomy and music for their own sakes or because of whom they're associated with.
Taking her uneaten dessert without asking this time--his inhibitions are slipping away. He's not even remotely embarrassed.
Exactly! His last lie to Nyella informs a lot of his psyche. Especially because it came shortly before his mother's death, and it's likely that his child brain connected that event to his lie. He absolutely does need a hug. And nothing more to drink.
For all Antavia's talk of wanting to be "real" and romanticizing suffering, she is in fact very uncomfortable with displays of emotion that are too real, that aren't performative and controlled (by her). She was egging him on to get "sobbing drunk" sometime, but once he does just that in front of her, she (probably a bit drunk herself) is repulsed. She doesn't know how to comfort people. She probably never got a lot of comfort herself. So she feel inadequate, and Josiah's woes, as you point out, are too similar to her own hurts but in a smaller way.
Antavia never had a Nyella. She had two relatively low-key Odrens. If she has to think about that too deeply, beyond the mockery she hides behind, she's liable to start crying too. And she'd rather die than do that in front of Josiah.
It is a speed run! And it's gotten away from her. Giving him her name to use puts her back in control of the situation by offering a distraction.
Part Nine of my liveblog of @isfjmel-phleg’s "A Pleasant Talk." We progress onward to our Salad days.
Oh, he's lost his calluses. Realistic, but maybe also a little symbolic to bring up at a guard-down moment like this.
He's getting weepy and a little uncoordinated, and he's searching for words.
Oh yes, Talfrin was a harp player. Hm. Even Antavia will drop her voice at the mention of him - she who's so brash. Hm. I wonder what her history was like with Talfrin. Evidently she said more than she intended to. I take it her hesitance isn't just "we don't talk about Bruno."
"Ruritanian" exists as a common use phrase in this world. There is a non-zero chance these characters have read good old Prisoner of Zenda! Or else "Ruritanian" is an actual generalized geographical term in this world, and is the equivalent of "Balkan" or something.
"She asked hopefully." Go write fiction and rejoice in that, Antavia, rather than hoping others have suffered misfortune for your own enjoyment.
Oh yes, his terrible seasickness. (You may be feeling from "seasickness" soon enough, Josiah.)
Oh. He's literally forbidden to go.
It makes me sad that they are out of contact.
They're both a little too poetic for their own good. Everything has metaphor lurking in it. (I love it, of course.)
Yes, definitely symbolic! He's no longer accustomed to making music, and he's lost a lot of the defense his fingertips built up (i.e. his defenses here are also compromised).
Yep. His speech started most noticeably breaking down in the previous section ("I would be seized to plead her again"), and from here on it's all downhill.
Talfrin did indeed play the harp, and the piano, and probably several other instruments. He and Antavia I don't think had the best history. The awful story fragment I have of them as kids has them in a lot of conflict. It's possible that he was one of the several men who unsuccessfully proposed to her with their eyes on the crown. Nonetheless, they did grow up together, and it probably shook her up a lot when he was executed, and it's hard for her to talk about him.
No one has read The Prisoner of Zenda, but it likely has its equivalent in this world, as many other books do, from which the term "Ruritanian" comes.
She does already write fiction, and she should stick to that! Part of her excitement is her eagerness to find people in similar circumstances to herself to validate her rejection of her family--but since this is all about her, and lacking in compassion for the individual's personal circumstance, it's rather insensitive.
Josiah is not a popular person in a lot of countries on the continent right now. International travel, even if he could afford it, wouldn't be a good idea.
It's indeed very sad that he and Ayra aren't speaking. In some ways, she has turned out to be more of her father's child than he has, and the ideological differences are only going to deepen over the years.
...I may have gone a bit overboard with the metaphors LOL
I think it's more like he held her hand than shook it. Probably the first human contact he's had in a long time.
Yet another liveblogging foray into @isfjmel-phleg's A Pleasant Talk. Now two thirds of the way through! On the menu for this course -
EGGPLANT GRATIN
"[A] grown man a few inches north of six feet" - I like the phrasing.
"He knew that. Why couldn’t his usually sharp brain pin anything down?" .......
Shut up, ghost of Odren. Especially in the form of mentally berating voice in Josiah's head, you're not currently in my good books. (Even if I agree that Josiah needs to get a grip on the drinking.)
"Wrestled his expression into what he hoped was a polite blankness." While I agree with being considerately composed in public, that there is a single-sentence heartbreak for me, knowing the context of what it means to Josiah to control himself. And blank himself out.
"The Duchess reached for her fork like a swordswoman selecting her weapon." I love the analogies connected with Antavia - they paint wonderful pictures both of her personality and Josiah's current disposition toward her. I wonder what impressions of his movements we would get if this story were in her viewpoint. (And gosh, it's been fascinating to have another story through Josiah's eyes.)
"[B]efore it actually started affecting him" -
“Me?” He grinned cockily at her. “I could do this all night.” Something about the tone of this made me wonder if Elystan has ever seen him like this. I get the impression that Josiah has never indulged quite this way before.
I don't like eggplant either. (although I once had stuffed eggplant leaves in Frascati, the little village where the popes would escape the summer heat of Rome before Castel Gandolfo became the retreat of choice - and they were incredible. My history professor who was leading the trip told us before we tried them that they would certainly be serving them at the Wedding Feast of the Lamb, and I can only agree.)
"He nodded and took a sip lest he say something regrettable." Like, "My old roommate used to do that all the time at school." (Though that's far from the worst thing he could say - I assume he is thinking of his own recent timetable.)
"and Eme—" 😭
The Duchess gave him a sly smile. “It could.” Alexa, play us a sea shanty. Here comes a ship.
"The cabernet, on the other hand, was nearly gone." I SUSPECTED. I WAS AFRAID OF THAT. It was altogether too successful at disguising the taste to be just water!!
That's the thing about that critical voice of Odren...he's not entirely wrong. Josiah is going off the rails and needs to stop. And there's been some truth in problems the actual Odren had with Josiah over the years (the fencing deception was absolutely the wrong thing to do). But whatever shred of reason there was was also so mired in harsh criticism that it negated anything helpful. Josiah in this moment could use an internal voice warning him against self-destructive behavior, but all he's got is a nasty internal critic that respresents everything he's internalized from his upbringing, and ultimately that's not helpful.
Again: self-control is good. Completely erasing yourself in the name of that, though...isn't. And as you've seen, he's not able to keep it up.
Antavia at one point in her life was a literal swordswoman! She studied fencing as a teenager. (An actual fad for women in the late Victorian era.)
If the story were in her perspective, I think there'd be comparisons of Josiah's movement to an automaton, or to a carefully puppeteered marionette, whose strings get looser and more poorly manuevered as the dinner progresses.
LOL this boy has no clue what he's doing
Elystan shared a room with Josiah for however many years and probably got to see all sorts of sides of him, including very embarrassing ones, but I doubt that this recklessness has ever emerged quite to this extent before. Any kind of overindulgence for him has typically happened in private.
I haven't had eggplant often/recently enough to have an opinion on it, but those stuffed eggplant leaves sound amazing!
"Something regrettable" might also include changing the subject to complain about the eggplant.
He was about to call her "Emenor," not "Miss Låsrygg," which would be the proper form of address--he thinks of her by her first name!
A ship, and perhaps also an awareness that this relationship is something that Josiah wants very badly and that could be used to win him over to taking up her offer...
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Sometimes a lender will return one of our books in good condition (thanks, appreciate it!), but the paper bookstrap taped around the front cover appears to have been through a war and back, or at the very least used as a coaster for an overflowing beverage. No harm done, but it does baffle me.
When I was a teenager, I used to look for face claims for my OCs on stock image sites, because that was what was available (this was pre-Pinterest). Wasn't always succesful. Found some that were fairly close. A very few that were spot-on. Like Amarantha.
It's her! This is exactly how she would look in a modern-day setting. There's a whole set of this model, and she's got the Amarantha energy down pat.
Wistful, serious, and dreamy, but with some irritation and side-eye.
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Literally only just realized we can all relate to stories with royals as the protagonists, because we were all born with responsibilities we have to put above our own well being
Two days into this week and there's already been a plot twist.
A good one this time. My brother has randomly decided to come visit next month. There's not much to do here, so I do appreciate that he actually wants to come. It'll be good to hang out with him.
I think it's a bit presumptuous to, upon calling a library and finding that our evening hours (which commence at the start of the semester next week) don't start soon enough for you, demand to speak to someone whom you expect will change our entire schedule just for you?
I'm not going to start working on the paper for the next convention quite yet, but I've got a tentative outline. I'm trying to remind myself as I work on this that I'm not conducting an exhaustive study and it's just going to be a 2000-word paper. I can expand it later, if I like, but I don't need to overwhelm myself going all out (bit hard for me, because my automatic response to writing projects tends to be Go Big Or Go Home, which makes getting anything actually done a lot more difficult, and I need to massively chill out).
Anyway, I'm thinking something like this for the structure:
Intro: Critics' negative reactions to and misunderstanding of Fanny is excessive, unwarranted, and misses the point.
Thesis: Fanny Price is a victim of childhood emotional abuse and neglect who exhibits signs of the fawn response.
I. Fanny's background of abuse and neglect and how it produces her responses/mindset
II. Fanny's traits as consistent with those of the fawn response and how this differentiates her from others who did not share her experiences (e.g. her own siblings)
III. Fanny's fawn response as it affects her behavior (the theatrics, the incident of the necklace, rejecting Henry, etc.)
IV. Fanny's ultimate (yet incomplete) growth
Conclusion: Viewing Fanny through this lens not only opens up the narrative to a more compassionate reading but also gives a greater appreciation for Austen's psychological realism and insight.
Got any suggestions for improvement? Could I arrange the argument in a more reasonable order?
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actually one of the best things that happened today was going to Sunday school class and telling the people (including two of our biology professors), without naming any names, about the one dean who apparently got us sent that scolding rather than discuss his presumed issues directly with us, and then one of the professors telling me, "yeah that's really dumb." yes THANK YOU maybe I'm not completely crazy and it is in fact messed up that people do things like that.
Well, it's been a long, hard week full of emotional turmoil and dinosaur fights incessant plot twists. Too many things that kept piling up. Made a list. Too much handling things alone. Finally broke down and called my mom in the middle of the workday on Friday because I just couldn't. Bad at making myself understood. I'm sorry. Really hoping for a better week this time. A better me, if I'm fortunate.
