A Couple of Secrets

Can we make an effort to create and promote better lifestyle content?

I’m tired of seeing all these repetitive posts with the same unrealistic Hotwife captions that are clearly written by porn-addicted men. No woman is telling strangers to “fill their slutty married pussy with hot cum”. I get that most people come to these blogs for fantasy, but it’s really damaging to actual couples who dabble in the lifestyle. It sets unrealistic expectations and creates a pool of unqualified suitors when real couples are looking for another man to join them.

No, a Hotwife is not a cum dump.

No, a Hotwife does not fuck anyone with a big dick.

No, a Hotwife is not just a fuck toy for your pleasure.

No, a Hotwife does not fuck some one else every chance she gets.

I’d love to see more blogs create realistic images and captions that reflect real relationships.

The blog is now taking a change in direction for a few different and important reasons but once we have explained we think you will like the new vision. As many of you know this blog first introduced the word stag to describe men into wife or girlfriend sharing but who did not identify as cuckolds. Over time the logo that appeared on the blog changed from Stag and Hotwife Games to Stag and Vixen Hotwife Games when the word Vixen first made its own appearance to make clear the difference between Vixens and Cuckoldress. When both terms reached the point when they seemed to be accepted, widely understood and in popular use, the logo was changed again to just Stag and Vixen. At this point the terms Playdate and Paramour were then also introduced as an alternative to some of the more extreme language, racism and material surroundings the word bull (though we still use bulls artistically here and there, along with Hotwife given that both terms have significant weight and history in sexual subculture at this point) At this juncture, we feel the time has come to change the name one more time and to change the tone and type of material we post. The logo will now be Stag and Vixen Romance for reasons we will go into below.  We will start with why we think a change of direction in tone and material is important … please stay with us, we promise not to take too long and no we haven’t gone all moralistic or anything. It is just some recent science and cultural changes we thought useful to incorporate into our approach.

Henceforth Stag and Vixen Romance will be built on three pillars

(1)   The reality of the desire for both men and women

First, this is real, whether or not people actually participate in the lifestyle or it remains no more than a fantasy life, this is a (real phenomenon) with much to back it up. Many men have always fantasized about sharing the woman they love with other men and many women in happy relationships with loving men have fantasies about being shared with other men or having the man in their life act as a voyeur as they engage in sexual behaviour with other men. While this kind of behaviour can occur within swinging and cuckolding, that is not what this lifestyle or fantasy is about, it exists on its own without any necessity for the male partners in such relationships to seek sex outside of their relationship nor for him to be humiliated by her or another man. There is nothing abnormal about it. It is a valid sexual desire and should be reflected as such like any other (even if the idea of kinkiness is played around with for occasional fun effect).

(2)    Romance : this is a thing for ‘COUPLES’ ( note : even wannabe stags and vixens need this )

Second, this sexual fantasy or reality needs to be bedded down where it properly belongs, that is inside well functioning mutually respectable solid relationships. It only properly exists within such a relationship. One cannot enjoy a stag and vixen relationship without a significant other that one has genuine feelings for. One does not necessarily have to be convinced you are with your one and only true love in every situation (although that is definitely best) but a good measure of genuine care, respect and strong likeability towards your partner is at least the bare minimum. It is a simple enough equation that the greater the love and respect between a stag and vixen partner, the greater their pleasure in the lifestyle. The blog will spend a lot of time dealing with the issues of how to establish and maintain loving stable relationships as an issue independent of the stag and vixen dynamic and lifestyle as this is the bedrock of the lifestyle anyway. A wannabe stag or vixen cannot be the real thing without being in a real relationship and those in such relationships will want to stay in them regardless of their stag and vixen status as that is simply far more important anyway. Even if your partner will not participate in such a lifestyle, a good relationship should be solid enough for them to understand that their partner has this desire and is able to speak about it without being made feel guilty or as if they are strange or peculiar. From evidence gained from running this blog, it is probable that only about half of couples in which at least one partner has this desire actually take this lifestyle into reality and those that do, do so to varying degrees of involvement (half way hotwifing is very popular). The remaining couples merely play around with the idea as a fantasy and game to add spice to their relationship and this is only possible when the partner with the desire can talk about it and the other partner is willing to listen. This blog is as much for those couples as it is for those more heavily involved in the lifestyle along with the wannabes.

(3)   Sexual Heath, physical and mental

The third factor is about sexual health, physical and mental, without which this lifestyle or fantasy is impossible to enjoy and may in fact even be dangerous. This blog will demonstrate how it shall represent and promote ‘safer sex’ (we don’t say safe sex because such a thing does not actually fully exist in real life sex anyway). While of course there will be fantastical ideas presented on the blog, the message of ‘safe sex ’will be examined, explained in detail, and promoted very strongly within the stag and vixen community through this blog.

We intend to create a two speed approach with regard to explicit material based on this. This is to encourage people to use erotica (particularly men) to charge the libido with the imagination rather than pure sexual imagery. We think we need better porn, not more porn, it needs to evolve to become a palace for the mind rather than the prison it can sometimes become for many. Please watch this fantastic youtube video that will more fully explain this idea. It is called (Better Porn) and was made by the organisation (the school of life)  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=85Ly9w3XsTo

(A) A new soft-core standard will apply on the site for all future material. There will be no more pictures of genitals or even full naked buttocks. There will be naked breasts and buttocks from the side or partially observable. At the same time the material will become even more erotically charged with concepts and ideas than ever before, requiring viewers to use their minds as much as their eyes.