Permanent Hiatus

     On a more positive note, got this from chimeracreations a while back and it was going to be my header at some point, but since that ain’t going to happen I’m uploading it here. Would much rather that my last post here was some lovely art instead of something depressing. 

     Bad news is that I still plan on retiring permanently, so I’m making a randomized password for both the blog and the junk email account linked to it so I won’t be able to log back in. This isn’t the hobby for me, it hasn’t worked, it never will work, and I’m tired of getting my hopes up and letting myself down by being such a depressive waste. 

     Guess this is goodbye, thanks for putting up with my shit for the last time. 

    “ Do you remember what lilacs look like? It’s a bit lighter than that. ”

Yes, the correct description of her ribbon would be to equate such colors to her hair. Unfortunately… Nina had never seen her hair before. It was difficult to remain smiling, despite being so adept at such feigning, for she was becoming more and more upset that she had not yet completed Nina’s new body. Given Nina her new eyes ; able to take in colors and sights that must be nearly forgotten by now.

     As difficult as it is, she will persevere.   “ No matter the color, it looks beautiful on you! Ah, but my Nina looks beautiful in anything she wears, doesn’t she? ”

     “ I... think so?.. So we’re seeing the same thing... “

     A sigh of relief, thankful that her senses didn’t deceive her for once. But whatever train of thought she was about to travel on was swiftly derailed, distracted by the sweet words and kindness that Christina offered her. The alchemist’s praise was met with laughter and a soft headbutt into her mother’s arms; if there was any reason to be upset, Nina certainly wasn’t acting like it was a problem. 

     “ Stop iiiiiit! You’re too nice, I swear... It’s like you’re... my mom or something... “

     “ How do you... use this?.. Looks dangerous... “

     A dull claw prodded the hilt of the fellow chimera’s sword with an audible tap, the first time she can recall coming into contact with the weapon ( if her memory wasn’t failing her again ). Curious as she was, every poke she gave was visibly restrained, as if she were afraid to do anything more without direct permission.

     So @deathleads​ convinced me to try coming back and I’m in desperate need of distraction so…

     “ Booooooooooored... “

     A furred head shoved itself into the fellow brat’s Lyssa’s side, threatening to knock the fellow Nest-dweller off her feet. Whether she liked it or not, it didn’t look like Nina was going to leave her alone anytime soon. 

    “ Of course my love, here here - ”  

               She’s reached forward, carefully untangling the bow from her beautiful hair, back to its original ribbon form. One of her favorites  - very nearly matching the exact shade of her hair under certain lights… but in the earthy brown of Ninas hair however, it looked positively colorful. Warmth radiates from her cheeks, easily brushing out the hair with her fingers to bask in such softness.  

    “  Do you like bows? We could go pick some out for you, of your own liking. Of course, you’re always welcome to take from mine whenever you’d like. ”

     “ I like this one... Can sorta... see the colors, a little... “

     The child’s world was a dull one, where once vibrant colors had shifted to blurred shades of grey and yellows. Only the brightest shades of gold and blue tended to catch her pale eyes, save for the soft purple of the bow she managed to dig up. She couldn’t help but wonder as Chris unwound the ribbon from her knotted hair, just what all was she missing out on? Did its hues even look the same to someone with better sight? 

     The incessant sound of claws against wood echoed from the front door, and opening it would reveal an old friend covered in freshly-fallen snow. But she wasn’t alone though; resting by her hands was a stuffed bear that she no doubt intended to offer as a gift. 

“ Can you... show me how to tie this?.. I think it’s... stuck, though... “ 

     So @deathleads​ convinced me to try coming back and I’m in desperate need of distraction so...

     These nights gave her such headaches. Waking in the darkness and going to bed in the same darkness, she stood in the barely lived in living room with idea that ‘Yes, a full bottle of wine ought to cheer me up’ before turning to towards the bookshelves to find something to read. Nina had managed to snap her out of her irritation long enough to know what was actually needed ; no wine, just water and a book while lounging on the couch in front of the fireplace with Nina…

That thought brings a smile to her face, thinking of Nina, her cute little daughter, laying comfortably and content either at her side or under her blankets. Of course her hands hold the girl close against her body.  Soon – Nina would be able to take her by the hands, her Mother here would even be able to look down into a pair of beautiful blue eyes… or perhaps green? Would she like brown –    “ How about a quiet night in by the fire, hm, Nina sweetheart? ”

     A faint smile and soft laughter, at least somewhat aware of the effect she had on her guardian. The girl was far more observant than her blank eyes would have one believe, having learned to recognize the slightest signs that Christina’s resolve was beginning to falter. A moment of repose never hurt anything, so Nina was more than happy to accept the offer Christina gave her. Perhaps unwinding for now would do the alchemist some good, making the nights to come just a little easier to endure.

     “ Th... that’d be ni-ice... It’s getting late... and cold... “

     A furred form grazed across the alchemist’s idle hand, squirming her head into an open palm and resting in it’s soothing embrace. It’s been far too long since she felt that warmth, that safety and sanctuary that only a mother could provide, and she never wanted to let that go again.