injuryfree

my friend can’t stop talking about how they want to set me up with their other friend so we start texting each other and they’re hilarious but shy about meeting and ALSO there’s a cute bike delivery guy who brings my mail at work and winks at me whenever i sign for a package AU

i’m obsessed with a food blogger who writes about cheap ways to be gourmet in your 20s and i flirt with them over comments but they never post pictures of their face and ALSO there’s a really cute grocery bagger at the store down the street who teases me and always asks to join me for dinner and i definitely want to say yes AU

there’s an overnight IT person at school who always answers the phone when i call about a problem with my computer and i totally have a crush on their voice and their exasperation and ALSO the bakery down the street is always running out of my fave scones and the adorable person behind the counter can’t hide their amusement and i think it’s super rude but also super cute AU

my boss is always telling me how perfect her son would be for me and she promises he’s coming to the next holiday party and don’t worry he’s heard all about me too and ALSO there’s this dude i slept with once a couple of months ago and sometimes he still sends me dick pics when i ask him to at 3 in the morning cause seriously dude’s got a good dick AU

our kids are bitter rivals and the only time we ever meet is when we’re both called to the principal’s office and whatever maybe i think you’re kind of cute but your kid’s a monster and ALSO someone keeps buying the last everything bagel at my favorite coffee shop 2 minutes before i get there in the morning and has heard about my plight and has started leaving me bragging notes about it AU

i hired a dog walking company and i’ve never met the person who comes to my apartment but they leave me really cute notes and they give my dog presents and i kind of love them because my dog does and ALSO one of the artists at this gallery opening is hella cute and i want them to paint me like one of their french girls AU

trigger warnings for dubcon/non/rape, incest/stepcest/twincest, stockholm syndrome, mental illness mention, abuse, murder, torture, bullying.

muse a is currently coming to terms with a traumatic life event/is dealing with mental illness and decides to find a therapist. her doctor recommends muse b, who specialises in hypnotherapy, and after a few sessions, muse a and muse b develop a rapport. unbeknownst to muse a however, every time muse b puts them under, muse b is only molding muse a to b’s every whim. as muse a begins to realise how they act to certain cues, and their unexpected growing attraction to their therapist, muse b has already completely psychologically their patient to obey their every command.

muse a is the new in town, and enters their community feeling positive about the new opportunities that await them. in their apartment building, muse a meets muse b, a young and shy member of the same gender, who muse a immediately embraces as a friend. however as time passes, muse a begins to notice things missing from their apartment, and muse b appears to be morphing into someone completely different, far more confident and outgoing than before. before long, muse a becomes paranoid, as they are frequently mistaken for muse b, and finds themselves secluded to the little apartment building. there, after much time spent holed up, they discover that muse b has begun to date the person a had originally been pursing, that muse b had now taken a’s position at the job they previously worked at, and that muse b is wearing all of those clothes that went missing from a’s apartment.

muse a is a member of a sports team and constantly picks on muse b. little does muse a know that muse b is currently dating muse c, the coach of the team, and one day after practice, the two corner muse a to teach them a lesson. alternatively, muse b’s parent/s are the ones who put muse a in their place.

muse a and muse b are twins who’ve always done everything together, despite being different in personality. muse b has always been the more dominant of the two, and behind closed doors, this behavior takes its form in unimaginably perverse ways. 

muse a is the nerdy kid in school and is constantly being bullied by muse b. when this bullying crosses another line, muse a decides to bite back.

muse a and muse b are (step-)mother and daughter. after having been at each other’s throats for some time, they decide to mend their differences by spending some time at the family holiday home. however, for some weeks now, muse c has been hiding out from the local authorities in the holiday home. muse c is considered armed and highly dangerous. when muse a and muse b arrive, they find that the home is certainly been occupied in the family’s absence, however what they soon discover is far more horrifying than a few bread crumbs and crumpled sheets.

FRIENDSHIP PLOTS

character b pretended to be character a’s significant other to get creeps to leave them alone and now they’re best friends

best friends who people think they’re together but aren’t

inseperable best friends who grew up as neighbors

character b moved away from their best friend (character a) but when they were reunited, one or both of them changed too much

used-to-be strangers who bonded over a mutual enemy

ex enemies who are now bffs attached at the hip

strangers who found out they were both dating the same person and became friends

best friends who are practically siblings and are close to each other’s families

in their teens, character b came to live with character a because of an unhealthy home environment

childhood friends who grew apart but are now reconnecting

saltmates (friends who bond over their mutual dislike of things) 

character a and character b were in a publicity stunt relationship but were really just friends 

character b was always ‘the troubled one’ while character a was ‘the angel who could do no wrong’

friends who always seem to find trouble and danger together

character a is always pushing character b to do/be better

character b is the only person who can talk character a through their panic episodes 

family friends who met because their dads are best friends too

confidents/cornerstones. friends who always use the other’s shoulder to lean on and vent to

unfaithful friends who are always talking shit / backstabbing

very protective friends, to the point where it can cause problems

friends who bring out the worst in each other (or the best) 

character b is the ‘parent friend’ of character a; character a is character b’s ‘corrupting’ friend 

INTIMATE PLOTS

(physical)

ex-enemies and now friends with benefits who like each other and it causes them to fight

frenemies with benefits who can’t stand each other but have massive chemistry

character a and character b are in serious relationships with other people but that doesn’t stop them

friends who explored their sexuality together when they were teens

(romantic)

character a is character b’s secret admirer

character b, character a, and character c are best friends had a threesome that started off meaningless until they all like each other 

best friends who relentlessly flirt all the time (#flirtationship) 

character a broke character b’s heart and they don’t even know it

one has a huge, one sided, completely dorky crush on the other

character b is character a’s first crush of the same gender and it’s causing confusion/problems 

significant others who are keeping their relationship a serious

a pair who is constantly off/on. they seem to break up only to make up days later.

territorial exes who don’t want to be together but still believe/act like the other belongs to them

strangers who were set up on a blind date that went really well

a couple who is currently on a break. character a is still being faithful but character b is not.

(exes)

exes were in a relationship when character a spent a summer in character b’s hometown

exes who are weirdly close

exes who can’t be in the same room without fighting

character b dated character a while in a relationship with character c

jealous, possessive exes who fight all of the time

best friends who dated but were unable to salvage the friendship after the break up

character a broke up with character b because they wouldn’t come out

character b almost got violent with character a so they broke up with them for their own safety

exes who regrettably got violent with eachother during their break up and it’s both of their faults 

exes who still hook up and pretend like there are no strings attached

character b dated character a and now they’re step siblings

exes who broke up because their families didn’t want them together

ENEMY PLOTS

used-to-be best friends until character a backstabbed character b

enemies who are pretending to date for whatever reason

became enemies as a result of being interested in the same person

frenemies who pretend to get along because they have mutual friends

used-to-be best friends until character a left character b for new friends

pair who think they’re friends when in reality they’re unheathily competitive with each other

character a seemed to go back on all of their promises to character b (such as moving in together, going to the same university, etc) and it ruined the friendship

a pair who became enemies so long ago that they’re not even sure why they still hate eachother

co workers who cannot stand each other and bicker all the time

characters were best friends until character b accidentally or purposefully outed character a

characters were best friends until character a started dating character b’s ex 

character b tricked character a into being their getaway driver and they both ended up arrested

MISCELLANEOUS PLOTS

(platonic)

character a is a bad influence to character b

old friends who met in group therapy but pretend they don’t know each other

people who are friends when they’re partying but don’t get along when sober

strangers who keep bumping into each other and now it’s like an inside joke

or maybe not. strangers who keep bumping into each other and now one’s convinced they’re stalking them

(intimate)

character a catfished character b years ago. character a knows who character b is, but character b doesn’t know who character a is. 

significant others who are on the verge of breaking up because their exes won’t leave them alone

a couple who is only dating because character b was dared to ask character a out and now they’re afraid of the truth coming out (or they’re exes because they did)

a couple who used to be in love but now all they do is cheat on each other and fight. they won’t let go for some reason

a pair that had a kid together  and character b abandoned character a to be a single parent 

MY FAVOURITE FUCKING SMUT EVER GOT FUCKING DELETED AND I STUPIDLY DIDN'T BACK IT UP FUUUUUUUUUCK

• massive thriving fully grown kink scene with people of all ages

• hole on dash

• massive SW community who advocated for a lot of positive sexual ideas and maintained public blocklists

10. Compost bin.

9. Park bench, out of the way enough that nobody remarks on the sight of it for a while. It sits there, rain beginning to fall, until a passer-by nudges it on the shoulder. Are you alright? It falls on its side with a wet thud.

8. Slaughterhouse.

7. Highway, the height of summer. Skin hisses where it makes contact with the searing asphalt and insects descend in a plague. The only break in the monotony, perhaps every hour or half hour, is the zipping past of an occasional car. They're high rides, with tall wheels that thump over the body, turning it to paste. The remains are found within the day but by that time bits of her flesh have traversed the length of the country.

6. Pig sty.

5. Beach, the early hours of the morning. The sky is overcast and the waves lap slowly at the blood soaking into the sand. In some time it will be discovered by joggers, but the seagulls, as always, are there first.

4. Alleyway dumpster.

3. Their own bathroom. The corpse lies prone, naked, as the blood pools in the gaps between the tiles. Its head is in the sink, tap still running over glassy eyes.

2. Public bathroom urinal.