Abigail: WELCOME TO PELICAN TOWN. WE’RE ALL CHILDREN OF YOBA. Sebastian: [doing something illegal behind Abigail] Abigail: KUMBAYA MY LORD.
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@incorrectstardewvalleyquotes
Abigail: WELCOME TO PELICAN TOWN. WE’RE ALL CHILDREN OF YOBA. Sebastian: [doing something illegal behind Abigail] Abigail: KUMBAYA MY LORD.

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After Pierre kicks Morris out of Pelican town Pierre[about Morris]: *crying* He's gone. I miss him so much. Pierre: *composes himself* False. I do not miss him.
Harvey walks into the Saloon like a tough guy Harvey: Tea, but the strong stuff. Leave the bag in.
Lewis meets the Governor for the first time The Governor: You must be Mayor Lewis. Welcome! Lewis: *laughs* Lewis: *laughs* Lewis: My name just cam out of your mouth.
Sebastian is trying to steal someone's phone and Sam caught him Sebastian: There is an adult picture of me on that phone! Sam: Adult? You mean, like, you're driving a car?

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Abigail: Shut up. Everybody, shut up! Don't move, don't speak, don't breathe. I'm trying to think. Sam, look the other way. You're putting me off. Sam: What, my face is?
MC(blind) is out with Harvey MC: You know, I'm sure you're really really handsome. If I see you, you'd look like a leading man in the movies. Harvey: You really are blind.
MC and Abigail are watching the sunset together
Abigail: Orange is such an awful color.
MC: You’re so beautiful when you hate the world.
MC surprised Sebastian when he got home MC: Surprise! Sebastian: Oh, crap. Is it our anniversary? MC: No. Wait... No.
Sam has a secret and won’t tell Sebastian
Sebastian: Tell me the secret.
Sam: Mom smokes in the car. Yoba is okay with it, but we can’t tell dad.
Sebastian:Â Not that secret, the other secret.
Sam: I’M BATMAN!
Sam: Shhhhh!

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Spouse[after helping on the farm]: I hate your job.
MC: I love you.
Spouse: Stop trying to make me happy.
Pam: I’m playing a new drinking game. It’s called 'Every Time I’m Depressed, I Take A Drink’.
Penny: That game exists. It’s called, ‘Alcoholism’.
MC is trying to get passed Pierre trying not to be noticed
Pierre: You’ve been avoiding me, MC.
MC: How do you do that without turning around?
Pierre: To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you… but here we are.
Lewis: Sam! I’ve been looking for you everywhere.
Sam: What a coincidence, Mayor. I have been avoiding you everywhere. *leaves*
Dear rice pudding, you are the celery of desserts. Be ice cream, or be nothing.
MC

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Sam is waking up from a nightmare
Sam: Spiders. They want me to tap dance. I don’t wanna tap dance.
Sebastian: You tell those spiders, Sam.
Sam: Ahh yeah. I’ll tell them.
Demetrius: What if your dope was on fire?
Sebastian: Impossible, sir. It’s in Harvey’s underwear.
Harvey: *stares*