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I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

Dante Alighieri

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Simonetta Vespucci: Who ate my leftovers?

Lorenzo de’ Medici: Who ate my brother’s ass?

Simonette Vespucci: Fair.

#simonetta vespucci #lorenzo de medici #giuliano de medici #source: vine

lucrezia: isabella, we were best friends since high school, except when you stopped talking to me because you thought your husband was into me.

lucrezia: …he was.

#submission #lucrezia borgia #isabella d'este #source: parks and rec

“I’m a bad bitch, you can’t kill me!”

— Lorenzo de Medici, after the Pazzi Conspiracy fails

#lorenzo de medici #source: vine

“Democracy is so overrated.”

—Dante Alighieri

#dante alighieri #source: house of cards

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Lucrezia Borgia: Tell me you did not start that fire!

Cesare Borgia (at the same time): I did not start that fire!

#lucrezia borgia #cesare borgia #source: elementary

Niccolo Machiavelli: I am dazzled by your presence!

Cesare Borgia: Everyone is.

#niccolo machiavelli #cesare borgia #source: a funny thing happened on the way to the forum

renaissancesuggestion

when u finally get to leave the priesthood and take up a military role

the old cesare can’t respond to your missive right now

why? ‘CAUSE HE’S DEAD

#very relevant #cesare borgia

One realm, one God, one king!

Dante, <i>Monarchia</i>

#dante alighieri #source: asoiaf

Because it's a man's world. Because of the axis of dick.

Caterina Sforza

#caterina sforza #source: veep

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Cesare Borgia: It's called a white flag, and you're gonna be waving it soon.

Caterina Sforza: THE ONLY THING I'LL BE WAVING IS YOUR DECAPITATED HEAD ON A STICK IN FRONT OF YOUR WEEPING MOTHER!

#cesare borgia #caterina sforza #source: parks and rec

Siri, why does God allow suffering?

Lucrezia Borgia

#lucrezia borgia #source: veep

Cesare Borgia: Sure, I'd love to see Juan get punched.

Rodrigo Borgia: Try again.

Cesare: I will stop Juan from getting punched.

#cesare borgia #rodrigo borgia #pope alexander vi #source: brooklyn 99

I may, for the first time, have been a bit of a jerk.

Cesare Borgia

#cesare borgia #source: brooklyn 99

cesare borgia: from now on we will be using codenames. You can address me as Eagle one. cesare borgia: Sancia is “Been There Done That” cesare borgia: Lucrezia is “Currently Doing That” cesare borgia: Caterina Sforza is …“It Happened Once in a Dream” cesare borgia: Alessandro Farnese is “If I Had to Pick a Dude” cesare borgia: And Luigi D'Aragona is…Eagle two. luigi d'aragona: Oh thank god

#submission #source: the office #cesare borgia #sancia d'aragona #lucrezia borgia #caterina sforza #alessandro farnese #luigi d'aragona

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Niccolo Machiavelli: I'd like to request discretionary funds to start a citizen's militia.

The Signoria: *uproarious laughter*

Niccolo Machiavelli: They never actually said no, so I just went ahead and did it.

#niccolo machiavelli #source: brooklyn 99

Niccolo Machiavelli: And now for a message of hope.

Niccolo Machiavelli: EVERYTHING IS GARBAGE.

#niccolo machiavelli #source: brooklyn 99

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