Santos: hey garcia, can I borrow your top?
Garcia: yeah sure
Santos: Thanks! *drags Al Hashimi away from Garcia*
Garcia: WAIT

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@incorrect-garsanshimi
Santos: hey garcia, can I borrow your top?
Garcia: yeah sure
Santos: Thanks! *drags Al Hashimi away from Garcia*
Garcia: WAIT

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Al Hashimi, to Garcia and Santos: you two look so good together, I’d put you in a boat
Santos: you’d put us in a boat?
Al Hashimi: isn’t that what young people say when they think two people would make a good couple?
Garcia: …you mean you ship us?
Al Hashimi: yes. I ‘ship’ you.
Whitaker: I have to book a hotel for a week while my landlord does repairs on my apartment
Dana: why don’t you stay at Al Hashimi’s house with Santos and Garcia while your house is getting repaired?
Whitaker, shuddering: god no
Dana: that bad?
Whitaker: it’s hard to look them in the eye after hearing santos call Garcia daddy and Al Hashimi mommy
Dana, spitting her coffee out: SHE WHAT
garcia: so is almost getting arrested part of your brilliant idea?
santos: shut up, nobody likes a smartass
baran: but you call me a smartass…
santos: it’s okay when you do it
🙏
Al Hashimi: Is santos okay? She’s been laying face down on the floor for an hour?
Garcia: yeah she’s fine, she’s just listened to the new Noah Kahan album for the first time
Al Hashimi, nodding: ah, so she’s gonna be on the floor for a few more hours then

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Santos: can you fuck the sad out of me?
Garcia: yes
Al Hashimi, glaring at Garcia: or…you could tell us what’s wrong?
Santos: I like your top, Garcia!
Al Hashimi: I have a name, you know.
Garcia: *sighs* Why. Why are you like this.
Al Hashimi: Hi, sorry I’m late. I was doing a couple of things and got distracted.
Garcia: I’m “a couple of things”.
Santos: I’m “got distracted”.
Santos: sapnu puaS.
Garcia: What??
Al Hashimi: What language is that?
Santos: Turn your phone 180 degrees.
*Santos was removed from the groupchat*
Santos: Why doesn’t Al Hashimi find me sexy when I bite my lip?
Garcia: What do you look like when you bite your lip?
Santos: *bites lip*
Garcia:
Garcia: Have you considered biting your bottom lip instead?

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Santos: Why do you let me win when we race up the stairs? You’re the faster one.
Garcia: Erm... it’s nice see your smile when you win!
*later*
Santos: Garcia was probably just staring at my ass, wasn’t she?
Al Hashimi: Yeah, she absolutely was.
Santos, looking through her clothes: Has anyone seen my top?
Garcia: yeah baby, Baran is in the kitchen.
Santos: *singing to baby jeign deaux*
Garcia:
Al Hashimi:
Garcia & Al Hashimi: we have GOT to get that girl pregnant