9 dumbasses, 1 cafe @incorrect-cafe-gang - Tumblr Blog

Becka: name a way to be nice to others

Adel: don't kill them

Becka: ...

Becka: setting the bar a little low, but I’ll allow it

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Kira: there are few things in life that can’t be achieved with occult dark magic

#kira

Kira: can I offer you a carrot reading?

Becka: uh, do you mean tarot?

Kira, pulling out a bag of baby carrots with runes carved into them: no

#becka #kira

Adel: stab wound? you mean ‘extra pocket’

#adel

Ryan: There are only two genders, kill or be killed

#ryan

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Max: It’s fucked up that firemen are always standing around shirtless with their defined muscles coated in glistening oil, like, oil’s flammable idiots

Adel: It's called building an immunity moron

#max #adel

Gi: I’m going to need everyone to be straight with each other from now on. No more games. This isn’t just for Max, either. All of us.

Kira: I’m always straight.

Ryan: oh, man, that’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told.

#gi #kira #ryan

Becka: I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off

#becka

Jon: and how do you think you’re going to stop me?

Kira: I’ll tell Liz

Jon:

Jon: you sick bastard

#jon #kira

Adel: here you go Dominic, a nice hot cup of coffee

Dominic: oh, it’s cold

Adel: nice cup of coffee

Dominic: it’s horrible!

Adel: cup of coffee

Dominic: I’m not even sure it is coffee

Adel: cup

#dominc #adel

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Jon: you deserve an award for putting up with me

Liz: you are my reward, Jon

[meanwhile]

Max: you deserve an award for putting up with me

Matt, without looking up: yeah, you’re a real bitch sometimes

#jon #matt #liz #max #jonabeth #m&m

Matt, walking into Jon’s room at 3 am: Liz said it’s my turn to use the brain cell

#matt #jon #liz

Jon: I think I’m allergic to eating

Adel: that’s not how it works

Jon: oh yeah? explain how every time I eat I get sick

Adel: maybe it you stopped eating month old feta cheese

#jon #adel

[when the Riveras + Matt are home alone]

Max: since I’m the oldest, that makes me in charge and Matt my wife

Becka: that doesn’t make any sense

Matt: don’t talk to your father like that

#max #matt #becka #the riveras #m&m

Jon: *getting down on one knee*

Liz: oh my god it’s finally happening!

Jon: *ties his shoelace*

Liz, wiping away tears: he finally stopped wearing crocs

#liz #jon #jonabeth

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