Why do I feel like I'm trapped?
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@imntdd
Why do I feel like I'm trapped?

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Iβm such a broken toy. :)
Drown // Bring Me The Horizon
Ayaw ko sana sumama pero alam kong gusto niya akong sumama. Mauubusan ako ng social energy so pano na?
Hi?

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09.26.2021 00:49 Hindi ko na alam saan na ako nakarating sa pagtulog ko nung ginising ako ni mama para palitan ng diaper si Bella. Ang alam ko lang pinipilit kong takasan na ang isipin yung desisyong sundin natin yung last resort ko para umigi yung pakiramdam ko at magkaroon ng kapayapaan/kapanatagan pero bakit ganito? Parang ngayong pa lang hindi ko na alam paano ako magpapatuloy? O kung ano ang susunod ko pang mga gagawin? Ang hirap hirap naman. 09.29.2021 06:28 Tanging naaalala ko na lang nasa panaginip kita. Hindi ko alam anong nangyari. Oo, namimiss na agad kita. 10.09.2021 03:08 Maraming araw na rin yung dumaan. Gabi gabi ko pa ring naiisip ano na ba ang kasunod? Mali ba ko na hinayaan na lang talaga kita kasi alam kong nawalan ka na ng gana sa lahat miski sa paglapit sa mga taong makakatulong kung anuman yung pakiramdam mo ngayon. Ni hindi ko alam kung nararamdaman mo rin yung nararamdaman ko. Nakakabagabag pa rin. Alam kong dapat itong isinuko natin tuluyang ibinibigay sa Lord, pero ang hirap hirap hindi mag-alala sa'yo. Madalas naiisip ko kanino na lang ako tatakbo kasi mismo yung koneksyon ko sa Panginoon parang ang hirap maramdaman. Ipinapanalangin ko pa rin sa Kanya ang patuloy na pagkilos Niya sa buhay natin at magkaroon ng tunay na pag-unawa sa mga nais Niya para satin pareho. 10.18.2021 09:04 Sinusubukan ko pa rin maunawaan lahat sa pag-iisip ng mga posibleng dahilan kung bakit tayo nandito ngayon sa sitwasyon na ito. Isa sa naisip ko ay dahil sa mga posibleng mga ginawa ko satin, na hayaang parang tinatago natin kung anong meron satin. Kaya na rin siguro hindi na naging maganda nitong mga huli, baka ganoon kita tinrato kaya ganoon na lang din kung paano ko naramdamang balewala ako. Alam kong lahat ng naiisip ko ay para pagaanin yung loob ko at magpatuloy. Nagtitiwala akong magiging maayos ang lahat. 10.20.2021 06:29 Nagchat ka raw para sabihing tapusin na ng tuluyan kung ano yung naging koneksyon (indirect message). Maiikling mga mensahe sa messenger yung bumugad sakin mula sa'yo. Kaya nung nagising ako, hinanap ko. Akala ko iyon ang nakita ko nung naalimpungatan ako. Panaginip pala. 11.04.2021 06:36 Pinuntahan mo raw ako at may dala kang bulaklak. Kasama mo si Jet at isa pang friend. Niyakap mo ko as if nakikipag-ayos ka. Pero hindi pa man natin napag-uusapan, naputol na. 11.15.2021 05:48 Hindi ba pwedeng tayo na lang talaga? 11.21.2021 00:05 Hindi naprotektahan ang puso ko kaya hindi rin kita naprotektahan. Sobrang hirap naman, Mari. Ang devastating. Hindi ko pa rin alam kung kumusta ba ako.Well, good news na hindi na ko umiiyak gabi gabi. Kaso pag umiiyak mas mabigat na luha yung iniiyak ko, mas malakas na hangos din sa Panginoon kasi wala akong kahit na sino. Wala akong mapagsabihan. Wala akong makausap sa nararamdaman ko. Wala akong matakbuhan. Wala akong makwentuhan. Wala ring makakaintindi.Hirap ako makatulog. Hindi dahil mabigat, kundi dahil hindi ko na alam anong gagawin ko kinabukasan. 01.01.2022 11:15 Nagtatanong pa rin sila bakit kita hiniwalayan. Hindi naman nila alam. Pwede ko bang sabihin na miski ako tinatanong ko sa sarili ko bakit tayo humantong sa ganito?
01.14.2022 23:28 Today, my emotions snapped. I broke down. I am so overwhelmed with everything that happens. I am still depressed but I need to do things lalo sa acads. My productivity has fluctuated like 150% since we broke up kaya mas nahihirapan akong magcomply sa mga deadlines ko. No, I am not blaming you for this or what we did. Fault ko yun kasi hindi ko mahandle ng maayos lahat. Sobrang hirap lang talaga para sakin lahat. Naisip ko, kung maayos pa rin tayo ngayon, yayapusin mo kaya ako? Naiisip ko lang lahat ng ganun. Sana maayos mo nahahandle lahat ng kinahaharap mo ngayon. 02.01.2022 09:23 I thank God for guiding me to make that decision - to let our relationship go. I'm sorry if I became so obsessed to make our relationship last kahit na you've been sending signals na napipilitan ka na lang gawin lahat dahil sa pressures. Lately, the truth has been unveiling little by little - from what really our heartsβ status to what our hearts really desire. I thank God for our lives. I prayed to guide you to His plan.
I miss you. :(
π·π»ββοΈπ°πΌπ©πΌβπ» https://www.instagram.com/p/CQPsulWnJ52/?utm_medium=tumblr
Lumipas na pala yung limang buwan. π Thank You, Lord, sa strength na hanggang ngayon nandito pa rin ako at normal pa rin! πππ» πΈ @itizmae β€οΈπ€ (at TOUCHED BY GOD'S GRACE MINISTRY AG) https://www.instagram.com/p/CPxIGU4HTeC/?utm_medium=tumblr
It's been a while. β€οΈ (at Mt. Manabu) https://www.instagram.com/p/CMpOTepHfbO/?igshid=d3vx3eafsl4a

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
Focus. (at Sitio Rosal Pavilion and Patio Roberto) https://www.instagram.com/p/CMpNvZDnIBO/?igshid=17zbrg4uaj27m
When you look at me vs. when I look at you. π (at Sitio Rosal Pavilion and Patio Roberto) https://www.instagram.com/p/CMpNa1xHZhY/?igshid=1f937gmyu4hwj
The obvious impossibility of carrying out such a moral program should make it plain that no one can sustain a relationship with God that way. The person who lives in right relationship with God does it by embracing what God arranges for him. Doing things for God is the opposite of entering into what God does for you. Habakkuk had it right: "The person who believes God, is set right by God--and that's the real life." β Galatians 3:11 MSG (at SM MOA Seaside) https://www.instagram.com/p/CKtdTWbn6At/?igshid=1un1oj352n3er
"It was sin that made death so frightening and law-code guilt that gave sin its leverage, its destructive power. But now in a single victorious stroke of Life, all three--sin, guilt, death--are gone, the gift of our Master, Jesus Christ. Thank God!" β 1 Corinthians 15:56-57 MSG Hallelujah, Jesus! ππ» (at TOUCHED BY GOD'S GRACE MINISTRY AG) https://www.instagram.com/p/CKtcld0nWHR/?igshid=1vzwj0mp8x89e
"I will be glad and rejoice in your unfailing love, for you have seen my troubles, and you care about the anguish of my soul." ππ»β€οΈ β Psalms 31:7 (at Seaside, SM Mall of Asia) https://www.instagram.com/p/CKtbsLPnLHI/?igshid=ld4kivj5y8is

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
It's uncertain, still I am looking forward to what lies ahead. I'd never go back but learn from what had happened. I am grateful for everything, Jesus! π₯° Have a blessed 2021 everyone! Let's continue to trust God and live His words. Greetings for everyone! π€β€οΈ (at Lambingan Hills Official) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJcoXSintO6/?igshid=16ipuhqtf1c3g