you can blame my stupid heart

Im so broken, man it's not even funny anymore

sorry for being pretty much dead i am on my calamity xie lian arc

jesus.. it would all be over so fast if i jumped out now

i think i fucked up my life

i find it ironic that the last thing i physically did for the person who left me was wiping off their blood in a public space so they didnt have to do it or even acknowledge it

what if i implemented a new coping strategy called gaslighing myself that this never happened

it feels so weird people telling me i look better because yeah i dont really cry anymore but if there was a train coming... you know

just saw some public photos of my ex from a theater play they were a part of.. they look so sad and empty in almost all of them and like among people who are smiling.. my shayla