guns

“i’m telling you,” jeongin says, exhaling a slow stream of smoke, sitting on a log, smoking a cigarette, and it looks so hot on him. “there is something in the woods. a man. or the bigfoot. maybe the mothman.”

“oh fuck off.” chan says, grinning. he’s got his big manly shoulders hunched forward, elbows on his knees, staring into the flames. “pass the chips before i start eating pinecones, im serious.”

felix is half laying against a log, vape in hand, blowing out a cloud that smells like watermelon. hums a little. maybe in agreement? maybe in disagreement? maybe his dick hurts again because hours ago jeongin accidentally hit him in the crotch with a really big stick? who knows. he passes the chips to chan.

“this is nice.” changbin says, smiling at the fire. “we should do this more often.”

“we should survive this first.” han mumbles, glancing into the trees.

“relax.” hyunjin says. he reaches over, stealing felix’s vape and taking a slow hit. “what’s the worst that could happen?”

minho just shrugs, staring into the flames.

“serial killer.” jeongin says immediately.

“bear attack.” seungmin adds.

“haunted forest.” han throws in, increasingly stressed.

“you guys watch too many movies.” chan says.

none of them hear the distant, dull thud of something heavy being dragged across the ground.

changbin starts digging in a bag to calm the others down. “does anyone want—okay, no, don’t throw that—han, catch—”

han fumbles the bag of chips, nearly drops it, then clutches it. “i got it. i got it. we’re good.”

“we were not good for a second there.” seungmin says.

“yeah, that was a close one.” jeongin adds, deadpan, flicking ash onto the dirt.

they’re such boys. around the little fire they set up(chan set up because he insisted on it, average man) it’s already messy, they leave fucking trash around, they’re just horrible. men.

hyunjin hands the vape back without looking, eyes flicking toward the trees for a second.

“relax.” chan says, noticing. “there’s nothing out there.”

hyunjin hums, unconvinced but not arguing.

“except your mom.” felix giggles, taking his little vape back and taking a fat pull. then holds it out to han. “you want next? it’s basically salad in smoke form, healthy as shit.”

han is fidgeting, blanket around his shoulders. “i dunno man… what if a bear smells the vape and thinks we’re giant watermelons? i’m not dying for your lung cancer bro, no offense.”

the fire crackles. sparks drift up.

jeongin takes another drag, squinting into the woods. “still. would be kinda insane if someone was just… out there.”

seungmin snorts. “yeah, what, dragging a body or something?”

they laugh.

meanwhile, you stab the shovel into the ground. finally. the metal goes into the dirt, and you lean your weight into it, push down with your foot, then lift it back.

first scoop.

you toss it to the side.

second.

third.

dig, lift, throw. dig, lift, throw.

“i’m gonna piss.” hyunjin says, standing up.

“don’t fall in.” seungmin says.

“don’t get murdered.” jeongin adds, flicking his cigarette.

“do get murdered.” minho mutters.

“don’t come back.” felix says.

“don’t go too far.” chan calls after him.

hyunjin lifts a hand in a little “yeah yeah” gesture without looking back.

it’s darker away from the fire. obviously. but like, noticeably darker. he fumbles with his zipper, muttering under his breath about this and that and—his foot catches on something. he doesn’t even have time to process it before he’s falling forward, hands coming out too late, and he slams into the ground.

his knee hits first, then his palms, and something shifts under him. wrong. plastic… slippery?

not rock. not root.

he freezes.

there’s a second, just one, where he thinks, no, ignore that. stand up. pretend that didn’t happen.

then he looks down.

the shape under the shiny black plastic is… familiar to humans biologically. long. wrapped. the plastic catches what little light there is, and there’s something inside. something very clearly inside.

“…what the fuck.” he breathes. looks up. sees you a few feet away, shovel in hand, dirt disturbed at your feet, a shallow start of a hole behind you.

you’re both still for a while.

and hyunjin screams. not like a cool, composed, masculine shout, no a full fucking little girl scream as he scrambles backward, slipping again, hands digging into the dirt as he puts distance between you and… that.

god. he’s beautiful. on the ground where be belongs, hair a little messy, eyes wide as fuck, he’s stunning.

“wait, wait.” you say quickly. you shift the shovel slightly, angling it away.

“oh my god, oh my god, oooooh—” he’s half whispering, half yelling, hands coming up. “i—i didn’t—i didn’t see, i thought—what the fuck is that?”

you… stand there. shovel in hand. a girl. alone. with a shovel. and a big fucking bag. in the woods. great.

“i— are you—are you—” his eyes are so big, you haven’t felt attraction since… ever, but he’s a really pretty guy, you can admit that.

you let the shovel slip from your hands, meets the ground. now, your acting skills come in handy. your shoulders tense, then fold inward just slightly. you learned how to do this, how to angle your body into this, you learned the biology and psychology of this, why humans act like this when they’re about to cry and how they act. your breathing shifts, quicker now, uneven. you bring a hand up to your mouth.

“i didn’t mean to.” you say. it comes out quiet. really adorable. you take a tiny tiny step back, acting like you’re scared, guilty. fucking ACTIIIING. “i didn’t—i didn’t know what else to do.” you whimper out.

“what…?”

you shake your head quickly, like you can’t even get the words out properly, like this is all just too much. “he—” your voice catches, you let it. lean into it. “he was—he was my ex and he—he hit me and i—i just—” you stop, breath hitching. god, you’re such a good liar, y/n.

you don’t have to force the tears as much as you’d think. just, yknow, enough to blur your vision slightly, enough to make your eyes feel better.

crocodile tears.

they work. they always do.

his tense posture drops. his hands, which were held up to push himself away, hesitate. “wait, hey. hey, it’s okay—are you—are you okay?”

you shake your head. “i didn’t mean to kill him.” you whisper, acting like you can’t even look at what you’ve done. “i just—he wouldn’t stop and i— euugh…” you cut yourself off again, pressing your lips together, acting like you’re holding the just oh so cruel reality back from an innocent guy like he is. you ain’t holding shit back, this is just an act. you evil bitch.

“hey, hey—” he pushes himself up, cautious. “it’s okay, i’m not—i’m not gonna… just what happened? if you, want to tell me, of course—“

you shake your head, eyes darting like you’re panicking. “he wasn’t supposed to—i just—i… i just wanted him to leave me alone…”

his face scrunches up. there it is. god. men are so predictable it’s insulting.

you look down, wrapping your arms around yourself. “i didn’t know what to do. i just… i panicked.”

“are you… are you hurt?” hyunjin asks, stepping closer.

you hesitate. again, all an act. then shake your head. “i’m fine.” but it comes out weak, unconvincing on purpose.

he doesn’t buy it, well that’s the point so after all he does buy it. takes a cautious step closer, then another. the bag is next to his feet now. he avoids looking at it. that’s interesting.

“hey. it’s… okay, just calm down, alright?” he’s quieter, gentler.

he puts his hand on your arm. warm. feels good.

you look down at it, then up at him. his face is… open(you haven’t seen a face this open since you tried your new axe out, okay murder aside it is a really open boy face, not keeping anything back from you). worried. brows drawn together, so beautiful. so dumb. so trusting and naive because you’re pretty.

“did he… did he hurt you bad?”

you let out a shaky breath. nod.

bitch please. you’ve never had a boyfriend. never needed one. never wanted one.

“i didn’t know what else to do.” you whisper, acting ashamed of it, looking down so he can see the tears drop. ohhh you evil whore.

“hey. hey, look at me.”

you hesitate before you do, make him want it first. also big mistake on his part, wanting this. eye contact makes it easier for you.

“you did what you had to do.” he says. let’s note that hyunjin is an evil bitch, he’s a boy, a dumb heartbreaker. “okay? if he was hurting you, if you were in danger, then… then that’s not… that’s not your fault.”

you watch him, how he’s trying to fix this. to fix you. to make it something understandable, something easier for his normal human boy mind to swallow. he’s comforting himself more, kind of. it’s endearing.

“i was just going to bury him.” you say, glancing back at the half started hole. “and then just… leave. i’m so sorry.” you start actually crying at the last words. the actress ever.

he follows your gaze, then quickly looks back at you again, swallowing. “alone?”

you nod.

he looks so… protective. “you shouldn’t be out here alone. i mean—not like—you know what i mean.”

you just let more pretty little tears drop.

he takes a big breath. “you don’t— you don’t have to— i mean— shit.” he runs a hand through his hair, clearly scrambling. “okay, okay, we can— we can figure this out, alright? i’ve got friends, we’re just, we’re camping not far from here, we can—”

friends.

oh okay.

you shake your head quickly, eyes wide and big and face looking heartbroken. “no, no, i can’t, can’t, if anyone finds out—”

“they won’t. i mean, fuck, okay, maybe they will, but we can—we can help, okay? we’ll figure something out.”

we.

he’s already including you??? what a cutie!

“you won’t tell anyone?” you ask, pathetic.

he hesitates. good. that means he’s thinking.

“i…” he glances back toward where he came from, then back at you. “not if you don’t want me to.”

and there we go.

“thank you.” you whisper. another tear slips down.

“hyune?” another man’s voice.

hyunjin’s head snaps toward the sound so fast you almost hear it.

“where the fuck did you go? did bigfoot fuck you bro?” another voice, different tone.

there’s three of them. (chan, his posture tells that he knows something is off. seungmin just behind him, eyes narrowed slightly. nobody can see that, of course, it’s still dark. changbin behind the two.)

fuck. okay. you don’t move. neither does hyunjin.

for a bit, it’s just a weird little… situation. you, him, the shovel on the ground, the bag just out of their immediate line of sight because of the angle and the trees and pure luck.

chan looks at hyunjin. (hyune, as you know him now) “what’s up, bro?” then, he clocks the little body next to hyunjin. “oh shit. hi? you… lost out here, sweetheart?”

hyunjin looks at them, then at you.

you shake your head.

don’t.

“i’m—i’m fine.” you say, voice angelic, a little shaky still. all on purpose. you take a small step back, trying to create distance from all of them at once. acting so scared. “i just… i’d rather—if you could just leave me alone.” you’re thinking about which one you’d gut first if they push.

“hey, no one’s—” changbin starts gently.

“nah, it’s…” hyunjin cuts in, so fast, then clears his throat, trying to smooth it out. “it’s nothing. she’s, uh, she’s good.”

seungmin doesn’t say anything, you wouldn’t even know he’s here if you hadn’t heard him barking around about bigfoot fucking hyunjin. which is fucking hilarious but bursting out laughing would kinda throw your perfect performance off.

hyunjin forces a shit laugh out. son get yourself together. “i just scared her, i think. came outta nowhere.”

you drop your gaze. like yeah, some random guy stumbling out of the woods while you’re alone at night.

seungmin tilts his head, talks to you. “you sure? ‘cause if some dude’s out here fuckin’ with you—”

“no dude.” you say quick, eyes flicking to hyunjin. sorry, hyune. “he really did just scare me. i was on a walk.”

“yeah uh… she’s good. i checked. we’re all good. let’s head back, guys. fire’s probably dying.”

chan is watching you, trying to figure out if you’re a problem or if you have a problem. “you sure you’re good?” god. the tone. what a man.

“yeah. yeah, i’m fine.”

“hey.” changbin says, sweet because damn you cute. “it’s okay. we’re not— we’re not gonna bother you, alright? we’re just over there.” he gestures behind them. “if you need anything or whatever, you can come by. if you want. no pressure. yeah.”

something weird is… in you. okay, wait, fuck, you’ve never felt this before. people are meat. meat screams, meat bleeds, meat goes in bags. feelings are for other people, not you. these dumb fucks actually want you safe?? tf?? it’s disgusting. it’s ridiculous. it’s… good??

you nod again. “thank you.”

chan exhales through his nose, then jerks his head slightly back toward where they came from. “alright. we’ll leave you to it.” he looks at hyunjin. “come on.”

hyunjin hesitates again. god, he’s bad at this. “okay.”

changbin gives you one last small, reassuring smile, which you still can’t see btw, it’s so dark that you couldn’t make fucking bigfoot out even if he stood in front of your nose. or if he was fucking hyunjin. “seriously, though. don’t be afraid to come by, okay?”

“okay. thank you.”

seungmin scratches his head. “take care, alright?”

“okay. you too.”

they turn, slow, not so sure about the situation, if you’re really fine. start to leave.

hyunjin mouths “i got you” then turns, follows his boys.

chan claps him on the shoulder. makes him stumble. “you’re explaining this later, dipshit.”

seungmin mutters “fucking weirdo beating it to scared lonely girls” under his breath.

changbin waves.

their voices drift. fade. gone. silence again. just you. and the body.

he’s an idiot.

absolute fucking idiot.

you look down at your arm, where that idiot’s hand was. it’s nothing. obviously. just skin. just warmth that’s already gone because our skin doesn’t hold it, doesn’t need it.

you’ve never… you don’t… feelings aren’t really your thing. that’s kind of the whole thing. but something, something weird, small and cute and annoying stays in you now. so new. so upsetting.

you exhale. bend down, pick up the shovel. mutter “fuck.” quietly, more out of habit than anything.

and then you stab it back into the ground. because whatever that was, it doesn’t matter.

it doesn’t matter how nice they were. how helpful. it also doesn’t matter that you’re really thinking about them now. who was that friend of hyune that called you sweetheart? sounded cute. was built cute. had a cute face from what you could make out.

and make out you’d do with him. would even let him drive his big hands in your hair, guiding your head down, sitting back against a tree while you kneel between his thighs. you’d love to listen to him say “fuck, sweetheart, just like that.” you’d take him all the way into your little mouth, nose to his skin, let him feel how much you can handle, how good you can suck him off, make him lose that calmness he dealt with you with until he’s bucking around.

who was the other guy that was going on about bigfoot? he was hilarious. that deserves a blowjob too, you’d say. uhuh, yeaahhh, you’d have him standing, back to a tree, legs spread, hands fisted in your hair while you suck him sloppy, spit dripping down your chin. make him your bitch.

and you’d lay that third wide sweetheart down on a sleeping bag, soft licks on him first, teasing swirls around the head until he’s whimpering “please, baby, please” yeah you’d take him gentle then deep, then suck so hard he feels it in his balls, let him hold your hands and whatnot sweet shit these kinda men are into because damn he was an angel.

hyune, that’s what your boy’s name was? doesn’t suit him. might be a nickname. anyways. he deserves a reward for what he just pulled for you, that reward containing your tongue tracing every vein on his cock, sucking just the tip until he’s begging, pretty please, baby, let me cum, i’ll be good i’ll keep your secrets blablabla. you’d let him, swallow every drop, then lick him clean while he stares at you and also try really hard not to stare at the body bag.

yeah you’re lowk a perv.

but these creepy little fantasies keep you entertained while burying the body. which you just finished with btw. you smooth it out, kick some leaves over it, drag your foot across the surface until it looks like everything else.

like nothing ever happened.

like no one was ever here.

you stand there.

then you pick up the shovel.

and instead of leaving… you go towards where the boys disappeared towards.

oh this is stupid. you know it’s stupid. there is no practical reason to do this. none. zero. negative, even. this is how people get caught, this is how dumb people die, how multiple victims of yours died already. you go anyway. doesn’t take long to see the glow even, firelight flickering through the trees. voices, loud, boy.

you stop in a fair little distance, close enough to hear, far enough to not be seen. you lean lightly on a tree, paying attention so the shovel doesn’t hit anything and make noise, and you listen.

“…i’m telling you, she was not normal, bro.” seungmin is saying as you settle behind the tree a little.

“yeah, no shit she wasn’t normal, she was alone in the woods at night.” jeongin says. “that’s already like… step one of weird.”

“she wasn’t weird weird, she was just scared.” changbin says quickly.

“yeah.” hyunjin adds, so fast. oh he’s bad at this. “she was just scared.”

chan pokes at the fire with a stick. “scared of what? you?”

“probably.” seungmin says. “i mean, look at him. man walks outta the dark while you’re alone? i’d be like yeah, cool, this is how i die.”

“thank you.” hyunjin mutters. “fuckface.”

felix leans back on his hands, stretching his legs out. “was she cute, though?”

silence.

your mouth opens a bit.

oh.

“…yeah.” changbin says first, a little hesitant but honest.

oh?

“yeah.” seungmin agrees immediately. “like—yeah.”

oh???

“yeah, no, she was.” changbin says. “like really cute.”

“oh my god.” jeongin says, sitting up straighter. “what the fuck do you mean she was cute and you just left her out there?!”

“calm down.” chan says, shoving him lightly with his foot. “she wanted to be left alone.”

jeongin slaps chan’s foot away. “no girl actually wants to be left alone in the woods at night—”

“you’re creepy, dude.” minho mutters.

“i’m just saying—”

“no, you’re just being weird.”

hyunjin is sitting back where he was before(except you don’t know where he was before but whatevs), but he’s not relaxed. so tense. you can see it even from here, the way he keeps glancing toward the trees. you smile.

“you could have just dicked her down.” felix mutters, voice so deep now that it’s a longer sentence, omfg who is this you’re interested, even while his posture is ass.

“what was she even doing out there?” han asks, leaning forward, oh he looks like a little bug, hello little bug.

“walking, i guess. or just… needed space.” changbin says.

“yeah.” seungmin adds. “probably just wanted a walk alone and then hyunjin is in the woods. i’d run.”

hyunjin. what a name.

“man or bear.” felix says.

“what?” chan looks at him.

“it’s on tiktok, dude. would you rather run into a man or a bear in the woods.”

they’re so fucking dumb.

“bear? i’d fight the bear.” changbin mutters.

“fucking liar.” chan whispers.

“no, i’m serious. at least the bear’s predictable.”

jeongin does that boyish smile while raising your eyebrows thing. “predictably eating you.”

“eating you out.” felix giggles. ???

“still better odds than some random dude.” seungmin says.

“hey.” chan gestures at himself, offended. “i’m a random dude.”

“yeah and i fucking hate you.”

“i’m strong. i’d take a man in a fight.” han says.

“it’s a question for women, asshole.” minho mutters.

changbin nods. “yeah she was shaking like a leaf—“

jeongin gets up. “i’m gonna go say hi.”

“no you’re not.” chan says, grabbing the top of his jeans and yanking him back down.

“let me go—”

“sit the fuck down.” seungmin says, grabbing his arm too.

“there’s a hot girl in the woods—”

“and she asked to be left alone.” changbin says. he’s so cute.

“yeah, and i’m gonna respectfully not do that—”

“dude.” hyunjin mutters. it’s really firm. hot tbh.

that does it. jeongin flops back down. “assholes. missed opportunity.”

“she’ll come by if she wants to. we told her, right?” changbin reassures.

“yeah. she knows.”

“and if she doesn’t, then she doesn’t.” chan says. “leave it.”

“fine.” jeongin mutters, lighting another cigarette because he’s a dumb boy. “but if she does show up, i’m talking to her first.”

“no, you’re not.” seungmin says.

“yes, i am.”

“no, you’re—”

you watch them. they’re all cute. why are they all cute?

“did she say anything else?” chan asks, looking at hyunjin again. they seem like good friends. they fit together well as friends. so boys.

hyunjin hesitates. you watch him. “…not really. just… thanked us.”

he’s not perfect, but good enough.

“i just think it’s a missed connection. like we should’ve exchanged numbers or something.” jeongin says.

“yeah, because that wouldn’t be creepy at all.” minho says.

“hey, want my number while you’re clearly uncomfortable and trying to be alone?” chan says.

han laughs. “dude, i’m so hard right now.”

“yeah, bro.” seungmin says.

“yeeeeah.” felix daps him up.

“same.” jeongin says, smiling ear to ear. he’s beautiful.

“you’re disgusting.” changbin says, laughing that cute little babe laugh.

“what? you said she was cute.” han shrugs.

“that doesn’t—” changbin starts, then gives up halfway through, covering his face. “oh my god.”

“it’s a natural reaction.” han tells him.

“to what? a conversation?” minho asks quietly.

“to the idea.” han says.

“the idea.” seungmin repeats.

“yeah.”

“just don’t nut in your sleeping bag again like last camping trip.” felix mutters, then takes a hit from his little vape.

han stomps a little. such a hot babe. “that was one time. and it was your fault for describing your sister’s friend’s ass in detail.”

you physically have to press your lips together to not laugh. watch them but in that studying way of yours that you do so well, how they lean into each other, how they interrupt, talk over, laugh too loud. the way none of them seem… alone. that they’re friends.

annoying.

hyunjin kept your secret. for no reason. for you. dumb. all of them.

you bite your lip, thighs squeezing together because shit damn fuck this is hot. they think you’re the victim. you’re the bad one here, and they’re at the idea of saving you.

jeongin’s still throwing his pretty body around. that tank top looks good on him. “just let me go peek. i won’t even talk to her. i’ll just… admire from afar.“

chan rolls his eyes. sassy. like okay daddy. “no. she asked for space, we give it. end of story.”

shit. you enjoy listening to this.

okay tbh let him come. you’d let him chase you a little, make him work for it, then push him against a tree and drop to your knees like right there, suck him fast while he groans “fuck yes baby, knew you wanted it” while you hollow your cheeks and make him cum down your throat in under two minutes because he’s all talk.

that other guy next(han), you’d pull him away from the group, sit him on a fallen log, straddle his lap so slow and so teasing, grind while he’s whimpering “is this real?” yeah baby it is and you’d help with that boner situation real quick.

then the deep voiced guy(felix). you’d blow him while he’s still hitting that cancer maker, making him cough-laugh-moan, calling you babe while you swirl your tongue just right until he bucks and cums sofly(softly, he looks like a fucking twink) with a long “fuuuuck”

you’d kneel in front of that quiet(but real funny) one too(minho), look up through your lashes, take him so slow and so thorough, aaaaaall until he’s gripping your jaw to fuck it, cumming while shaking. from where you are, when he does get talkative, he’s hot.

but when minho does get talkative again, you leave. not because he finally spoke more, you’d love to listen, but because you have to fucking go.

they’ll never know how close you were.

how close you still are.

dumb boys.

you drive out there again at like 4am the next day, hike until you find their place again. it’s trashed, empty beer cans, just men littering. assholes. but the important part is the tire tracks. two vehicles. you follow one out to the main road, remember the direction they went off (toward the city, not the highway), then go home and start your little business.

you find jeongin in no time. in a club, specifically. dancing, cig somehow lit (how the fuck), hips not stopping, sweat making his shirt cling, sly grin everytime a girl grinds on him. someone tries to take the cigarette from his mouth. he dodges, grinning. “buy your own.” asshole. you follow him when he leaves at 3am with two friends. his apartment’s fifth floor.

next day you learn he bartends at a bar two streets over, y’know shaking cocktails, flirting with everyone, sneaking cig breaks in the alley where you’re hiding behind a dumpster eating fries. other option, you sit at the bar in a wig and fake glasses (cliche but effective), order a soda, watch him flirt, pour shots with flips, flip me like that too daddy, wink at girls while calling guys boss. he’s disgusting. perfect. you imagine sucking him off behind the bar while he tries to keep pouring. you leave before close.

he lives alone. parties every night. you watch from the roof across the street deadass through binoculars while he rails some random girl on his couch, then immediately texts his gc with the boys after. that’s about how much he cares about the girl. so not at all. jeongin, you beautiful slut, you’re perfect.

once you start, it’s… hard to stop. you already have one thread. might as well pull the rest.

changbin and hyunjin are roommates in a cute two bedroom loft above a coffee shop, big windows, have blinds but they forget to close most of the time. fuck you hope they’re not gay. well not like you would have a problem with them being gay, you just really want to fuck them. like really.

on yeah you found the names out. heard them talk, listened carefully. simple shit, wasn’t hard. (you’re a fucking creep)

hyunjin’s room has soft lighting, so him, posters of bands you don’t give a flying fuck about, art shit, and usually hyunjin himself sprawled on his bed in just boxers scrolling tiktok with the most angelic little face or frown or smile while changbin yells from the kitchen “bro did you eat the last yogurt again you absolute whore” changbin’s room is simple, just like he is. maybe a bit messy until hyunjin starts to fuss over it and cleans up. you usually watch for hours, watching changbin talk to his mom on the phone, get into his nice car and talk to it like it’s his baby(luxury. changbin’s got money or daddy does. hot.), hyunjin laugh at his phone, watching him stretch, watching him scratch his balls. you’re so wet you almost slip off from wherever you’re watching. god you’re disgusting.

chan next. easier. he lives alone. you park in the alley behind his building most nights, watch him come home from whatever blue collar job he’s got (construction? delivery? something with his hands). shirtless fridge raids of his are… wow. fridge door opens, light comes out, you can see his broad body, sweatpants always about to slip off that round ass, scratching his abs while he stares into the fridge. grabs a beer, chugs half standing there, scratches his balls. you zoom in from across the street.

you hear him blasting shitty rap while doing push ups shirtless. so cute. manly. you sit on the fire escape across the alley eating and kinda maybe jerking off to the way his back muscles move. he was there for you in the woods so you’re there for his morning wood outline in those gray sweatpants. fair’s fair.

han and minho are in a shittier apartment complex downtown, third floor, blinds always open. brutal win tbh. you sit on the stairwell one afternoon pretending to scroll tiktok while han comes home from wherever nice boys go, carrying grocery bags and humming. minho’s already inside, you hear his voice when the door opens telling han to “quit singing that fucking song it’s stuck in my head now.” makes you want to puke and also hump the doorframe. you watch han jerk off once, quick, face buried in a pillow. you almost applaud.

seungmin also lives alone. looks really depressive but he seems to be having fun by himself(he always looks mad asf), he just lies around when he’s home. maybe on the couch, maybe in his bed when he’s not working. he’s pretty boring to watch but really pretty so maybe not that boring after all. he cooks for himself too. looks cute doing it. you’d like to try his food one day.

felix is rich. you tail him from the gym (where he and chan and changbin go to fuck around, felix does nothing) to a fucking mansion ass house with a gate code you memorize after watching him punch it in twice. parents barely home, felix smoking something on the balcony in a silk robe. you climb the fence one night and watch him facetiming his mom while shirtless, saying “yeah mom i ate vegetables today” right before he snorts a line of something off his coffee table.

when parents are home, he spends time with them. seems to be bored of them tho. (an: this characterization of felix is not affected by his sisters, so it’s up to you, dearest reader, to think of him as someone who has siblings or is a spoiled only child) you watch him walk in one afternoon and his mom hugs him at the door. he leans down into it, smiling, being an angel of a boy.

“you eat?” she asks.

“yeah, ma.”

liar. he didn’t. you know that because you followed him the whole day.

you climb the tree in his backyard sometimes, fucking lunatic, watch him through his bedroom window. he’s on discord with the boys, vaping(like specifically vaping, the pussy boy, real men smoke actual cigarettes, he’s a little bitch), being loud, saying nasty shit. does he kiss his mother with that mouth? you cackle in the tree so loud a neighbor’s dog barks. he’s dreamy and spoiled and seems out of reach and that naturally excites people more and you want to fuck him on his own king bed while his parents are in the bahamas.

they were up to be there for you. so now, you’re there for them. creepy? yeah. a little pervy? absolutely. but means a lot coming from you. because you want to go back to these assholes of boys, for some reason(and not kill them). again. and again. and again.

you’re everywhere and nowhere.

there for them. every night. every shower. every fridge look through. every drunk walk home. every disgusting fucking word said to each other.

you work on a fucking schedule. monday, hyunjin and changbin. tuesday, jeongin’s bar shift where you sit in the corner nursing one beer for six hours while he winks at you. wednesday, felix’s mansion where you watch him play video games in his underwear. thursday, seungmin’s place for watching him shower. friday, minho and han beating each other up playfully. saturday, chan walking around shirtless at home on the phone about some business. sundays go for planning. planning good, and the reward for that is watching them eat cereal, watching them argue over who gets the aux, watching them jack off, watching them exist, cute, clueless.

they wanted to save you, you’re just returning the favor. because you’re just looking out for them!!

you love doing this. you love watching chan stand in front of open fridge in just pants(no underwear if you’re lucky), scratching his happy trail absentmindedly while deciding between leftover pizza and beer. usually picks both. eats standing up, leaning on counter, one hand down his pants adjusting his dick. once flexed his pecs twice in the microwave’s reflection, then went back to scrolling his phone.

another time he jerked off on the couch facing the window. lights off, curtains open, fucking win, slow, good strokes while watching porn on his laptop, head tipped back, mouth open when he came on his stomach. wiped it with the same t shirt he was wearing earlier. boys.

he also orders food everytime. you have never seen this man make food.

hyunjin is quieter at home. comes out of the shower in just a white towel(doesn’t use other colored towels and doesn’t like it when binnie does either), water dripping down his chest, hair wet and dark. you like his hair. it’s almost kinda curly? cute. he stands in front of mirror, towel moving with him as he brushes his teeth, stomach muscles flexing when he reaches for mouthwash. once he let the towel drop completely to lotion his legs. holy fuck. long, pretty thighs, cock soft between them. you almost came just from watching and this is not an exaggeration.

beautiful even when he’s picking at a pimple in the bathroom mirror. one evening you see him humping the edge of the couch while on his phone, mouth open and panting because he’s trying to be quiet with changbin in the next room. cums in his boxers, bites his lip almost fucking bloody to stay silent, then changes like nothing happened.

changbin talks to himself while gaming, yells “fuck you laggy piece of shit” at the monitor, slams controller down, then apologizes to it and panics because he doesn’t want to buy another one. he came home drunk once, tripped over his own shoes(he’s lucky hyunjin didn’t see him walk in with shoes), face down on the bed still in jeans, ass up, snoring within thirty seconds. another night he jerked off under the covers, quiet little grunts, phone glowing on his face. finished with a soft “oh fuck yeah” and then immediately texted someone. you couldn’t see what he texted. you’re thrilled to.

you watch changbin vacuuming in just basketball shorts, singing until hyunjin shoves his dirty sock feet into changbin’s face. they also cook together a lot.

one evening hyunjin comes out of the shower in nothing but a towel on his hips, out to the kitchen to make something, and changbin wolf whistles then throws a pillow at him. hyunjin drops the towel to mess with bin, standing there naked(holy shit his pubes are so attractive, you’re this attracted) before changbin screams “dude put it away, i’ve seen that shit multiple times and it’s still weird!”

seungmin’s balcony sliding door is always cracked for his cigarette smoke. fucking goldmine. he paces there while on the phone, shirtless, scratching his ass crack through basketball shorts. once he walked out just boxers to piss in a plant. why? but his dick was cute so anyways. flips himself off in the mirror sometimes.

jeongin sometimes brings girls home, quick, loud fucks against the wall you can hear through the thin glass, him moaning “yeah baby just like that” while the girl giggles. when he’s alone he jerks off in front of his computer with the volume up, pretty mouth always left open as his face twists. hot.

he parties hard, comes home at 4am stumbling, pisses in the sink(???) then crashes on the bed still wearing shoes. one morning you watch him wake up, scratch his balls for a solid minute, then immediately light a cig before even brushing his teeth.

eats cereal randomly just because he’s jn the mood to, milk dripping down his chin. cutie.

han acts like a teenage girl. lying on his stomach, legs swinging, on his phone. you don’t understand why doesn’t he have bitches. he’s attractive.

another night he jerks off in his room, quiet little gasps, whispering “fuck fuck fuck” under his breath because he’s trying not to wake minho.

minho, meanwhile, scratches his ass crack through his boxers while cooking, dick soft but outline visible. makes your mouth water. you also see him jerk off once in silence, back to window, hot, hand moving under the sheet, cums with just an exhale, rolls over and sleeps like nothing happened. you felt like hitting the jackpot there.

felix’s bedroom window at the fucking mansion is second floor but the tree’s perfect. he’s home most nights because “studying” means discord with the boys. scratching nipple absentmindedly while talking shit. jerks off on call with the boys once, cam off mic off, “hold up guys brb” then wet slapping sounds, heavy breathing, “fuck fuck fuck” cums with a hot manly groan, then unmutes, camera back, back to game “aight i’m good”.

or “bro i’d let her sit on my face till i pass out for reaaal.” his mom calls him down for dinner and he yells back “five minutes, ma!” then goes right back to describing in graphic detail how he’d fuck someone.

jerks off to hentai, by the way. loud moans from the anime girls on screen while he strokes himself on his bed, whispering “yes mommy” unironically at one point. you nearly fall out of the tree laughing.

showers with his bathroom door open sometimes, takes his slutty little showers hot, singing badly(could be good if he did some training tho, there’s a potential), towel around that babe waist when he walks back into the room, drops it to air dry, cock bouncing as he flops on bed to scroll. scratches balls while texting, leg up, full view. you’re in love.

you’re in love with how they are. how they live. how they do, what they do.

you know a lot and you’re in love with that lot. you know chan watches sport. you know minho stares at himself in the mirror after showering, tracing his scar, flexing his arms, proud of himself. you know changbin eats an entire family size bag of chips in bed, crumbs everywhere, falls asleep like that. you know hyunjin humps his pillow in his sleep. you know han always walks around the place just in boxers. you know felix kisses his mom on cheek after saying the nastiest shit online, then goes upstairs to smoke and jack off again. you know seungmin yells at everything, from football on the tv to dogs barking outside. you know jeongin has surprisingly good piss aim.

they’re so boys. so gross. so human. so hot.

you watch them scratch, curse, jerk, eat, sleep, piss, flex, throw up, moan, laugh, cry once (changbin after a bad day, curled up hugging pillow, sniffling like a kid). you watch them live like no one’s watching.

but you are.

always.

you see them be everything. changbin brings hyunjin coffee in bed one morning. chan helps an old lady with her groceries then comes home and immediately sniffs his armpits and makes a face. felix argues with his dad about college but then hugs him after. jeongin texts the group chat stupid shit at the middle of the fucking night and they all reply instantly even when half asleep. han blushes at his own horniness. things like these.

goooood you’re such a fucking creep.

sitting in your car at 2am with the seat leaned back, binoculars fogging up from how hard you’re breathing, heart doing this stupid shit it’s never done before.

you used to kill people and feel nothing in general. now it’s like… discovering fanfiction and vibrators at the same time. head over heels. stomach always full of butterflies. first crush of your entire empty life.

you didn’t even know feelings could do this.

growing up you were just… flat. eh. meh. other synonyms. kill, move on, kill again.

but these assholes made your feelings turn on. these useless dumb fucks. genuinely what do they provide to society.

you recognize yourself smiling during the day thinking about chan’s body. you think about hyunjin’s gentle voice while fingering yourself in the shower. minho’s nose. han’s teeth. jeongin’s face shape. changbin’s face fat. felix’s flat little boy ass. seungmin’s way of controlling his eyebrows. all so unbelievably hot.

you’re in love. actual disgusting love. with all eight of them. simultaneously. that’s actually eight times feeling more than you ever did.

you have never felt and you do it in eight ways now. it’s brain melting.

but you just love them so much.

to start with, felix’s happy trail is brutal.

that sooooft little line of dark hair disappearing under his waistband when he walks around his room shirtless maybe after a shower, still damp, oh your fucking GOD. you watched him scratch it absently one night while arguing with his discord friends, and you almost fell out the tree.

it’s not even that deep, just a normal boy happy trail, but on him it looks like an arrow pointing to heaven and you want to follow it with your tongue until he’s begging.

jeongin’s dimples. fuuuck. when he grins that sly, cheeky grin after telling one of the boys to suck his dick, those little dents just pop in his cheeks and you feel it straight in your clit. you always have to bite your fist not to moan out loud while watching him.

you want to kiss them, bite them, sit on his face while he smiles up at you with those stupid dimples.

chan’s shoulders. unreal. usually slightly sunburnt from whatever outdoor shit he does, flexing everytime he reaches for something on the top shelf or does push ups in his living room(why do men enjoy that? fucking asshole). you love how they fill out his shirts, how they look when he’s shirtless scratching his lower back, how they push his traps up when he rolls them. like daddy let me grip them while u fuck me slow, telling me i’m safe even though i’m the actual danger.

hyunjin’s hair and that mouth(that looks like it but didn’t get lip filler, at least you didn’t find any information of that). the way his hair falls into his eyes when he’s laughing at changbin, how he smiles when he’s being evil. you watched him brush his teeth once, foam at the corners, then spit and smile at himself in the mirror because he’s proud to be pretty. so cute. you want that mouth on every part of you.

changbin’s got this smile, this warm, boyish face shape that makes you feel okay even from fifty feet away through a window. his whole build is just friendly, good to be around. you love that softness. want to fuck it up just a little. but mostly just fuck it in general. you want to fuck this man. bad.

seungmin’s mouth, from the bratty shit he spits at people to the way it has this triangle shape sometimes. like okay world class bottom stfu but also like keep talking u cute. like a little puppy. most kissable mouth on earth. caressable face. boopable nose. suckable dick.

minho’s face shape. his nose. the way he moves his eyes, eyebrows. finding this man felt like winning the lottery, watching him slap on han’s back and laugh at whatever the other did. you want him to fuck you with those intense beautiful eyes locked, hand over your mouth so you don’t wake the roommate.

you’d scream anyway. not to be a brat, just because you’re too in love with these men to not feel that good. but it he wants you to be, you could be a brat too, of course.

han’s nervousness, his awkward energy. the whole setting of the guy. the way his pretty face goes red and he looks down at his feet, kicking the air around??? hot babe. you watched him try to hide a boner during movie night by crossing his legs awkwardly, blushing, and it was the cutest fucking thing ever. you want to make him blush harder while you’re on your knees.

you feel… never better. ever. about the way felix’s already deep voice cracks when he gets excited on discord. jeongin’s cigarette smoke curling around his jawline. chan’s happy trail too, you’re dripping wet just thinking about it. hyunjin’s long fingers when he plays with some kind of smoke. changbin’s pretty little handwriting on the grocery list stuck to the fridge. seungmin’s ass posture. minho’s veiny arms. han’s messy bedhead every morning.

at first it scared you, feelings? gross. attachment? even grosser. all of it ew, ew, ew!

you sat in your car after one particularly long stalking session, hands shaking, not understanding what the fuck was happening. you didn’t have a word for it until you googled shit, turns out it’s called a crush.

it’s so pink. it’s embarrassing. your notebook (yes you have a notebook now, you absolute creep) is full of little doodles, hearts around jeongin’s name, stars next to hyunjin’s, tiny knives next to seungmin(??? tf is your problem).

you’re in love with men. specifically these eight men. their smells (you’ve gotten close enough some nights to catch hints of deodorant and boy sweat), their laughs, their boners, their kindness, their evilness, their stupidity.

you love how they scratch their (big) asses, how they announce horniness, how they always beat each other up.

it feels like you’re floating on pure pink. fuck!! rainbows out your ass. little hearts above your head. genfuckinguinely. your brain is 80% vibrating dildos and 20% planning the most meticulous breaking and entering schedule known to man.

because that’s what you’re going to do.

night one, chan’s place when he’s sleeping over at hyunjin and changbin’s. easy entry through the bathroom window he always leaves cracked because “fresh air, bro.” the fucking second your shoes touch his floor you feel like fucking exploding.

better than any kill you’ve ever done.

you giggle. you have to slap a hand over your fuckass mouth.

you look through his laundry basket first, bury your face in a worn t shirt that smells like sweat and pure christopher chahn bahng. steal one of his gray sweatpants (what else, they’re overrated but for a good reason) and a pair of boxers.

you open his fridge, touch the beer cans, lick the rim of one. disgusting fucking freak. spin around in his living room, arms out, laughing because this is insane and you’re so happy it hurts. you’re so in love that you’re this disgustingly cringe. you’re such a girl.

you leave with a hoodie of his and the sweatpants & boxers.

night two, jeongin’s. fire escape is your best friend. you pick the lock on his balcony door with shaking hands that are shaking from excitement, not even accidentally fear. you have no reason to be afraid(you have all the reasons to). you’re never afraid bfr.

inside it smells like cig smoke, a good cologne, and boy. you steal his half empty pack of cigarettes, the lighter with the scratched on dick drawing, and a t shirt with some print on it that was on the floor and maybe cum stains on the inside.

you roll around on his unmade bed, face pressed into his pillow, inhaling deep while your thighs clench together. the rush is so strong you have to sit on the floor for a minute just breathing through it, laughing to yourself. you’re fucking unbearable.

you take a pair of his socks and a mug besides the lighter and the cigarettes and the shirt, all of it in the shirt which is tied together. when you climb back out you’re spinning on the fire escape.

night three, changbin and hyunjin’s loft. they’re both out at some group thing so the place is empty and waiting just for you. you go through their bathroom, steal hyunjin’s strawberry scented body wash (makes your pussy drip), one’s dirty sock from the laundry, and changbin’s toothbrush. men don’t miss shit like these.

from hyunjin’s room you take one of his hoodies and the vape he left charging. he’ll just bitch to bin about losing it. from changbin’s you pick his perfume up, dig a shirt out of the back of his closet, spray it on until it’s swimming in it, then open the window so he’s less likely to smell it when he comes back, take the shirt with you.

you sit on their couch for abt ten minutes just imagining them wrestling there, then jump and hop and squeal around for a while.

you leave with their shared grocery list stuck to the fridge as a souvenir.

day four, han’s and minho’s. han’s room is a mess of energy drinks and dirty clothes. you steal one random pokemon card he left on his table (he has hundreds) and a pair of his boxers that have little dinosaurs on them. cuuuuute. you want to make him cum through them one day.

minho’s room is… kind of tidy, just as much as a man can be tidy. you take one of his hoodies that smells clean, maybe out the laundry recently, plus the book he’s halfway through with his little underlines. he’ll buy another one, suspect han for making it disappear because who else. you heard minho talking about wanting cats once. han wasn’t against it. sounds nice. hm, you’d be down to pet a cat right now. maybe on the way home.

the fucking rush after locking the door behind you makes your knees weak. holy fucking fucked pegged shit. men.

five, seungmin’s hellhole. balcony door was unlocked. dumbass. inside it’s takeout boxes and laundry mountain. you steal one of his best looking hoodies, a half used bottle of his body wash that smells aggressively masculine, and the pillowcase from his bed. smells like scalp. men. good.

you sit on his couch and imagine him jerking off(standard girl in love activity, actually)(like stop reading and take a moment to imagine the man jack it), then stand up and do a little spin, giggling tf around while clutching the pillowcase to your face. you feel like you could run a marathon and finger yourself at the same time.

day six, felix’s parents’ mansion. hardest one, had to wait until his parents were out and he was at a class.

you climb the tree, pop the window lock, climb into his room that smells like fucking heaven because of those flavored car batteries he sucks on plus the expensive ass cologne he sprayed on before leaving. you steal one of his college hoodies and the hentai body pillow he hides under his bed (you almost scream laugh when you find it).

you roll around on his bed for a solid five minutes, face buried in his pillow, legs kicking in the air, rubbing on your clit for a bit but not enough to cum, you heard something outside and even though you kinda knew it wasn’t a human, better not to risk it and lose one of the loves of your life. when you climb back down the tree you’re giggling so hard you nearly miss a branch.

in the car you’re screaming, fucking deadass crying punching the steering wheel because you’re so fucking happy.

seven, back to changbin and hyunjin again? no, you already did them. you saved the second round for overlaps but actually you hit chan again? nooo. you planned it, after the first pass you come back smarter, but this time you’re just riding the high. for the love of the game fr. actually you do a quick second hit on jeongin because his place called to you, steal another cig pack and one of his used condoms from the trash. giggle the whole way home.

there we go.

you sit in your apartment surrounded by the shit you got, your treasures quite fucking literally, hoodies on your bed, stolen socks, the lighter, the toothbrush, the dino boxers, the body washes, the cum stained t shirt, the body pillow, the grocery list, everything.

you’re horrible. spinning in circles in the middle of your living room with your arms out, one of the socks on your hand. fuck u so jolly about.

you haven’t laughed like this in your entire fucking life.

you love these stupid beautiful assholes.

you pull chan’s sweatpants over your face and inhale, then grab jeongin’s lighter and flick it on just to watch the flame while you cackle. you have never done dumb shit like this ever.

but it’s pink. rainbows. hearts. vibrators on max. girl.

you’re dizzy and horny and happier than any serial killer has any right to be because you’re a horrible person.

the feeling is…

everything.

you’re in love.

your apartment looks… fucking pathetic, to be honest with you. you really do need some fucking help. random men’s hoodies around the place, the socks, jeongin’s cig packs sitting on your nightstand next to the lighter with the dick, felix’s body pillow propped up on the couch (you say hi to her every morning), hyunjin’s body wash in your shower so you can smell like him while you fuck yourself. yeah we’re not talking about how many of those things have lived inside you by now. we’re definitely not talking about the nights you rode chan’s pants or used changbin’s toothbrush handle when you were too lazy to grab a toy.

anyways.

you truly, deeply, absolutely, surely love them.

it’s not just lust anymore. it’s pink. sweet. you love the men shit. the cute shit. the everything shit.

you love watching them touch each other. when they’re being boyish and friendly and rough. that’s so sweet when men do that. hyunjin pulling dirty laundry over changbin’s head then wrestling. chan clapping seungmin on the back so hard that you’d die if you were seungmin, then pulling him into a quick bro hug. jeongin throwing an arm around han’s shoulders while they’re walking to the car, ruffling his hair until han laughs and shoves him off. minho being pressed up to han’s side when sitting somewhere. felix passing a vape or a cig or whatever shit they ruin themselves with to hyunjin and their fingers brushing.

you see these and feel like you’re the one being touched. like their hands on each other are on you too.

you love how they move. how loud they are. how they look at each other across tables when they’re in public.

such friends. ones you never had. such boys. that never interested you until now.

you love when they’re on the game(average man activity). you’ve got a spot outside han and minho’s place where you can hear the yelling through the cracked window. han screaming while his legs kick in the air. minho grunting. once you zoned out and imagined those were the sounds of them fucking. unfortunately, wasn’t.

or at jeongin’s, where you can hear him saying disgusting shit. calling the others virgins and cucks and things he can’t say. or seungmin, either hyping minho up or telling felix to kill himself. felix doing a hundred things beside the game and still managing to play good. hyunjin’s tongue poking out when he focuses too hard. changbin dying, slamming a few things, then going over to hyunjin’s room to watch him play. chan is mostly quiet, he needs his mouth shut to pay attention to playing, can’t multitask like that. you learned that too.

you sit somewhere in the dark where you can see one of them from with your hand between your legs and feel fucking proud of them.

you love when they visit their parents. their parents are really different, each’s. you caught han nervously fixing his hair before heading to his parents’ place, then coming back and announcing to minho “dude my mom still thinks i’m a virgin lmao.”

they’re adorable.

seungmin’s visits are shorter, you hear him arguing with his dad through an open window but he still hugs him goodbye. jeongin gets to family barbecues drunk, always smiling, flirts with his own aunt by accident.

the others’ visits aren’t that interesting. felix lives with his parents, we know that. hyunjin’s parents are chill, kind of boring. changbin sometimes takes hyunjin with him. minho brings shit(though his cats aren’t the only thing purring when you see him play with them there) chan’s parents live in another country, you only can listen to the phone calls.

you follow them to the grocery store and watch what they buy. you sit outside the gym when they go lift together, peeking through the window as they spot each other, grunting, sweating, clapping hands. fucking pussy dripping. you follow them to the movies and watch jeongin throw popcorn at han’s head while hyunjin rests his head on minho’s shoulder.

you’re so in love it’s pathetic.

and like… you used to be empty. now you’re overflowing with emotions. just how you wish chan would flood you ;)

and now there’s this new feeling creeping in. one not so pink.

it’s… best way to explain it would be ice through your chest. a cringe thing to say but it’s the realest, maybe.

because they don’t know you.

they met you once in the woods, even only half of them met you there. they have no idea where you are now.

they don’t know your name. they don’t know you killed a guy at seventeen first and kept going because ending lives is the only thing that makes you feel(besides their cute asses now, or course). they don’t know you’ve broken into every single one of their homes and touched everything they own.

they think you’re just some random girl who already went away

it hurts. you want them to know you.

everytime one of your boys so much as looks at a girl, you have to kill. jealousy. the sudden urge to dig another hole in the woods. you tell yourself it’s because they’re your men, your boys. you watched them first. you have their hoodies and their shirts and their fucking toothbrushes. those girls are just temporary. shit that needs to be silenced.

and good thing you’re a serial killer, right?

good thing for you.

bad fucking news for any bitch who’s not you.

jeongin is the worst offender. he brings girls home like a revolving door fr. you watch from a fire escape while he grinds against some random club girl against the wall, she moans his name, his flawless dimples are out as he smiles. the dimples that are supposed to make an appearance for you. you see his hands on her waist, see him laughing into her neck, see him fuck her fast and her face not facing him because it doesn’t mean anything. afterward he offers her a smoke, and you have to throw up.

you hate her.

you hate the way she touches him. you hate her voice, her hair, her body, her face, her everything.

so you follow her.

easy. she’s drunk, stumbling out of jeongin’s building at night with a post fuck glow that makes you want to carve it off her. you follow her, remember where she lives. two nights later you sneak in and hit her once with the shovel, right to the temple. the bag you brought is big enough. you zip her up still warm, drag her out the same way you dragged your last body, load her into the trunk while humming some song changbin was singing while cooking last week. woods again. deeper this time. hole bigger than usual because you want to insult her a little.

you go back to jeongin’s place the next night, he’s on the phone with the boys, laughing about how the girl from last weekend “ghosted him” and how he’s already eyeing someone new at the club.

you’ll end her too. it’s always going to be the same end, that he’s safe again. he’s yours again.

you catch felix flirting with a girl at the mall once. she giggles, touches his arm. you follow her home too. another bag. another trip to the woods. you bury her shallow because you’re in a hurry to get back and watch felix game with the boys, listening to him complain that “girls never text back”

you would. immediately.

hyunjin and changbin bring a couple girls to a group hangout once. nothing serious, just friends of friends, but you watch as one of them sits close to hyunjin, laughing at his jokes, whatnot. you would do the same, he’s beautiful. three days later she disappears after a yoga class. they never find the body. hyunjin is unbothered.

seungmin hooks up with some girl who calls him “daddy” and he laughs at it. oh? fuck you “oh”ing about, you hate it. you follow her to her car after she leaves his place, bash her skull, stuff her in the trunk of her own car, drive it out to the woods yourself.

chan doesn’t bring many girls home usually, though one night you watch a tall brunette leave his apartment at sunrise, she makes it two more days before you catch her jogging and choke her.

han doesn’t get bitches. girls talk to minho but he never goes anywhere with them.

han could pull you. already did, if we think about it. and you’d take minho out.

you love them.

you really, really love them.

and love means keeping them safe from anyone who tries to take even a second of their attention.

that’s only natural.

so everytime another girl smiles at one of your boys, everytime she touches what’s yours, everytime she exists too close, you pick up the shovel.

what you also began to pick up on is where do the boys usually hang out. you know each’s full schedules now.

you’re following them on the street now, after one of their little bro nights. men are so cute. hood up, one of jeongin’s stolen cigs between your lips even though you don’t smoke, just like the imagine of the taste of his mouth on it.

the eight of them are loud as usual, taking up the whole sidewalk, fucking asshole men and not noticing themselves. assholes. hyunjin and changbin are bumping into each other on purpose, han’s in the middle fidgeting with his phone, felix and chan smoking something together, passing it back n forth, jeongin walking backwards trying to talk to minho who just gives him a middle finger.

then. some other guy group rounds a corner. about seven guys, typical dumbasses, they’re quieter. one of them clips chan hard, shoulder to shoulder.

“excuse me bro.” the guy mutters.

“excused.” chan says. clear, wanting to sound like an asshole.

the dude turns around like chan just called his mom a whore, grabs chan by the hoodie, yanks him back hard enough to make his feet skid. hits him. chan ducks though, punch goes past his ear. wow. hot. and also pretty fucking concerning, watch out sweetie.

han’s dumb little ass tries to step in with a confused little “yo what the fu—” and catches an elbow straight to the cheek from one of the other guys. he stumbles, hand flying to his face. it’s adorable. “dude i didn’t do anything! what the fuuuck!”

oh but no worries, seungmin immediately swings on the guy that hit han. but then we also have to keep in mind that seungmin is not that strong at all, so changbin can’t help but help him out with another hit.

jeongin drops his cig, smiles, glee as he swings on the biggest one. dumbest fuck on the planet. oooh by then hyunjin is dodging. makes his hair bounce, pretty. can’t land any hit tho, doesn’t even try to. and minho is just too manly to not do at least a little good.

little.

felix is… trying to turn away. pussy. gets yanked tf back.

okay. wow. you follow it as it moves into a little side street, alley almost. bodies slamming into dumpsters, trash bags splitting open, someone’s shoe flying.

fucking men. only they’re this animalistic to do this. dumb.

god they look hot fighting tho.

you’re dripping wet. chan’s shirt rides up everytime he throws a punch, the way that man’s muscles move. jeongin’s laughing with a split lip. he’s gorgeous. hyunjin moves like a dancer, quite fucking literally(with evil in his heart, men are evil). changbin’s protecting han, throwing himself between. fucking respect. seungmin hits just for fun. minho actually manages. han is whining “guys i’m fine, ow fuck—” blood comes from his nose. felix… is having the worst night of his life. it’s so fucking hilarious you have to bite your fist.

they’re not winning tho.

seungmin takes a solid hit to the jaw that snaps his head back. jeongin’s on the ground for a second before rolling away. hyunjin’s perfect lip is bleeding. changbin’s shielding han but catching kicks. chan’s breathing hard. felix keeps getting yanked back. minho is the last one standing tall but even he’s slowing.

you want to, but you don’t interfere. this is their fight. their stupid boy moment. their chance to be loud and dumb and protective of each other. you want to see them like this, bleeding, these looks aren’t crossed off your list yet. you want to watch. the punches, grunts, when one of them checks on another midfight (“you good han?” “fuck off i’m fine”).

“you’re getting your ass kicked!” that’s jeongin, then gets yanked backwards. “okay, i’m getting my ass kicked—”

felix is on the ground, back against the wall, arms up trying to shield his head. rich kid. the guy on him brings a fist back, real heavy, about to turn felix’s skull into red paste on the bricks.

your body moves, your brain doesn’t even know about it. that’s for not interfering. belt. gun. into your palm.

bang.

one shot. right through the side of the guy’s head.

dude drops instantly.

felix lets out the most pathetic, girly yelp you’ve ever heard. “FUCK—holy shit what the fuck—” he scrambles backward on the wall on his ass, legs kicking, so scared, staring at the body and then up at you.

suddenly the guys don’t want trouble. “yo what the fuck—” “we’re good, we’re good—” “cops, man, fuck this—” they go real quick. tripping over each other.

the alley goes dead quiet. well, if we don’t count the heavy breathing and the drip of blood, maybe.

your boys are standing there bleeding, bruised, staring.

you’re shaking.

your lips are trembling. the gun is trembling in your hand. your knees feel like they might give out any second. dizzy.

hyunjin… smiles. chuckles. stumbles over, blood on his split lip, eyes big. “hey… hey it’s you.” he reaches up slowly, brushes the hair out of your face with shaking fingers, then tilting your head so he can see you better. “hi. hi. talk to me. hey, look at me. you okay? talk to me, please.” he can see you’re not okay.

his other hand comes up to hold your gun wrist, his big, warm palm wrapping around yours to keep the trembling gun in it’s place. he would never take that gun from you.

chan wipes blood from his mouth with the back of his hand, the pieces click in his perfect, genuinely perfect head. steps closer, keeps a respectful distance, more cautious though. you just shot someone. “alright. oh, uh, this is the girl hyune ran into that night in the woods. remember? whatever.” he glances at the body, then back at you. “you good?”

your lips are shaking, trying to open your mouth to answer. acting a bit too good.

changbin’s cute little mouth takes an o shape as he realizes. seungmin spits blood on the ground, proccesses. that’s for the guys who “met” you already.

jeongin? chest heaving, watching. minho? same. han? don’t be stupid, barely standing straight. felix, still on the ground, ass in a puddle, staring at the dead guy next to him. “what the fuuuuuuuck.”

jeongin finally finds his voice. “headshot.” yeah staying quiet would have been nice too, babe.

hyunjin holds your face. “hey, ignore them for a second. look at me. just talk to me, okay? tell me what’s going on in that pretty head. you’re trembling so bad, got you. it’s okay.”

your lips won’t stop shaking. all eight of them are looking at you.

good girl, y/n.

gooooood fucking girl.

that’s how you get something you want.

“i didn’t… i didn’t hurt any of you, did i?” you mumble out. c’mon, you could have easily answered to hyunjin, didn’t on purpose.

they all shake their heads.

“we’re good. you just… saved felix’s stupid head.” hyunjin says. “what’s your name? tell me your name.”

“y/n…”

chan steps closer, shrugging off his jacket. he trusts you more now, obviously. it’s warm from his body, has the smell you’ve jerked off to more times than you can count. he drapes it over your shoulders, big hands adjusting the collar. “here. keep it. looks better on you anyway.”

he means that to make you smile. it does, just not with the lips on your face.

han(sweet, grateful, still bleeding from the nose) comes up to you too and and wraps his arms around you in a biiiiig hug. crushes you, kinda. he obviously doesn’t hug(or touch) girls often. but like. oh?

you lean into him, let him hold you, fucking MILKING it, forehead pressing into his shoulder. he smells good.

“thank you. thank you so much. seriously.” he says. “i thought my face was about to get rearranged. thank you.”

the face hyunjin makes because he just got pushed away from you.

felix is standing up just now, brushing dirt off his ass, legs wobbly. it’s okay, baby.

you’re shaking harder now, but from them. this close. han’s arms around you. his body on yours. chan’s jacket on you. that you’re the center of their attention.

they have no idea you’re a major creep who’s been stalking their every move for weeks.

they have no idea the shaking is because you’re standing in the middle of your eight crushes and your pussy is throbbing so hard you’re scared they’ll smell it.

to them you’re just y/n. the woods girl. their savior.

“my—my name’s hyunjin. by the way. i’ve been thinking about you since the woods.” okay mr loverboy. attached asf. “lean on han if you need to. thank you.”

han keeps one arm around your waist, hand pressing into you so he’s really holding you, keeping you up against his side, bouncing you lightly. “got heeeer.” now you get why they call him by his surname.

changbin nods. “yeah, seriously. han’s got you. i, uh, i’ll grab water from the car. felix, stop pacing, you’re making her dizzy.”

felix mutters “sorry” but keeps doing little anxious circles anyway.

“shut the fuck up, bin.” chan says. mean daddy. “she’s probably in shock. y/n, you want us to walk you somewhere? call someone? or… shit, you wanna come back to one of our places and sit down for a minute?”

they really do want you to know they’re grateful.

only if they knew.

han squeezes you tighter, better, turns his head to look at your face, his cheeks are pink. both at the closeness of a girl, something he doesn’t usually get, bitchless little asshole, and at the fact that all this just happened to him. you want to bite them.

you’re dizzy. lips trembling. they can see that. all of them can. all are looking.

finally looking at you.

finally touching you.

finally grateful.

jeongin takes a big breath, fishes a cig out of his pocket. offers it to you with shaky fingers. “want one? helps with the nerves sometimes. or… nah? cool, cool.” he lights it for himself instead.

they’re all over you. making sure you’re okay. making sure you know they’re grateful as fuck.

you’re dizzy. crazy.

“uh, okay, shit, alright.” chan says, looking around. “we’re not leaving a fucking corpse in the middle of downtown. bin, seungmin, lix, do something about it.”

seungmin throws his skinny arms up. “the fuck? why me? fuck off.”

changbin throws his hands up too. he’s adorable. “broooo! what if i puke? what if i cry? i’m sensitive! i was just about to bring her water!”

felix keeps shaking his head. “no no no, i have to go home! my mom’s gonna kill me! i’m literally the weakest link here, you saw me get handled like a bitch the whole fight!” poor boy he was so scared that he couldn’t talk until now, couldn’t talk to you, to any of them out of shock, and now his words have to be defending himself :(

“okay, jeongin then.”

jeongin’s hands fly up, burning cig in one. “dudeee! what the fuck, man?! i throw up when i see ketchup packets open wrong! i’m delicate!”

chan rolls his eyes. sassy. “do it.”

seungmin grumbles the entire time, calling everyone “pussies” and “useless cumrags” while he starts searching for helpful shit with aggression. changbin is whimpering “i’m gonna throw up, i’m gonna throw up” as he holds the legs. felix keeps trying to “guys my parents love me, they’ll notice if i come home smelling like death, please—” himself out of it until hyunjin turns and tells him he’ll tell felix’s dad what happened. felix shuts up and grabs an arm, muttering “this is bullshit.”

changbin mutters “i’m telling my mom you made me do this.”

“go.”

“what if i just supervise?” felix.

“dude, just… do it.” jeongin mutters, given up.

chan sighs. “we’ll walk y/n home. text the gc when it’s done and don’t fuck it up.” turns to you, voice changes to angelic. “c’mon, y/n.”

the four of them look crushed because wdym chan did this to them, made them do this then left with the bad bitch. (oh chan would’ve taken you only with him but he knows he couldn’t make hyunjin, han and minho also stay away.)

but the other four are already walking you out. around you. manly. about you.

han hasn’t let go of your waist(through chan’s jacket) the whole time, just so that you’ll stay upright. he’s worried. you seemed so unstable before, he has to hold you, right? he doesn’t want you to fall over, get hurt.

you’re leaning into him, eyes basically bout to close from bliss.

chan looks cute, just walking, hands in pockets, looking down then up. “you, uh, always carry that gun around? haha.”

“yeah… i just… got it after some bad shit happened. never thought i’d actually use it.” lie. smooth as butter. “i don’t like hurting people but… he was gonna smash your friend’s head in. i just reacted.” you almost said felix’s head. almost slipped. didn’t. gonna reward yourself later with a sweet treat or fucking yourself with changbin’s toothbrush again.

hyunjin is walking backwards so he can keep looking at you. he shoves his phone into your hands, screen on to add contact. “put your number in, hm? don’t want you to disappear again.”

oh. okay. wow. what a romantic. you don’t even know what to answer.

you take it, type yourself in with trembling fingers. he grins(that beautiful hyunjin grin) when you hand it back, immediately texting you a little heart emoji so you have his number too. hello??

han bounces you again. “here, wait.” he fishes his out and holds it under your nose. “i wanna be able to check on you.“

WOW. you add your number. he saves it as y/n.

then, oh, a phone is poked under your arm from behind. you glance back and minho gives you a tiny tiny smile, eyes adorable. aww. you add your number too. he takes the phone back without a word, right corner of his mouth twitches up. bitch kinda autistic but bad asf.

chan opens his mouth, doesn’t have the balls to ask for your number too. will ask for it from the others. “oh, uh, that’s minho. anyway, you saved felix back there. changbin, buff one, is also there. longer one’s seungmin,” longer one, pfft. “and jeongin. you already know hyunjin. uh, han.” han turns his face into yours to smile at you. “i’m chan. or chris. whatever.”

“you guys seem… really close. it was kinda nice seeing you all stick up for each other.” you’re doing amazing, y/n.

hyunjin runs his fingers up your arm once. he knows women like that. he knows how to use himself. “and then you saved us. my hero.” cringe. romantic. makes your knees weak.

“yeah, thanks.” minho mutters.

you can’t believe this is happening.

these are the boys you’ve been stalking for weeks. the ones whose hoodies you sleep in, the ones you’ve watched jerk off, scratch their asses, visit their moms. and now they’re all over you, talking bout some you’re their hero. ha.

“i’m glad none of you got hurt too bad. i just… reacted.” you manage.

hyunjin tilts his head charmingly as he sighs. acting, just like you are, except he really does feel overwhelming love, just using tricks he learned over the years. “you reacted perfectly. now you’ve got our numbers. use them. text me, okay? i’ll worry otherwise.”

han squeezes your waist. “same. and if you need anything, y’know, ride, food, someone to talk to, just say the word.“

you can’t believe this is real.

like this is actually fucking happening?? you’re fucking shaking, trembling not to turn and jump into minho’s arms or whatever.

when you finally reach your building han gives you one last gentle bounce and a tight hug. he’s physical. “text us when you’re inside, okay? don’t disappear.”

hyunjin leans in, presses a soft kiss to your forehead. doing a bit too much for just meeting you. on purpose. “goodnight, y/n. thank you, again.”

only one that knows about your little ex story. well, that’s fake, but still, only one. and still he be doing toooo much but you’re too in love to process it as anything but charming.

chan claps your shoulder lightly. “get some rest.”

minho nods, mouth pulled into a tiny line. he’s adorable. little meow meow. “goodnight.”

you wave with shaky hands, and mind you, they’re waiting for you to go in. real men asf not leaving until you’re safe for sure. han is smiling, wide, boy, hyunjin is waving, tilting his head, angelic, chan and minho are chatting.

apartment door shuts. okay. you have to get up to your floor. shit. your legs are shaking.

you manage.

the second your door shuts behind you, you slide down to the floor, breathing hard, having to squeak. cry. smile. laugh. scream. slam yourself into something.

it’s an unbearable feeling. it actually feels bad, no matter how good you feel, it’s so much that it’s torture.

phone pings.

hyunjin: heyy it’s hyunjin, you home safe?

han: did u make it?? u were so shaky lol

han: im hwn

han: han

han: soery

han: you can also call me jisung if u want :)

chan: this is chan. u kay?

minho doesn’t text. pussy. stares at chan’s phone over chan’s shoulder tho. and of course, you don’t have their names pre saved, we’re just signaling that you know who’s texting. save them later as their names though.

this is actually happening.

all eight end up having your number eventually.

you’re not used to this. you’re used to watching them from shadows, not having them reach out.

you’re actually wanted. each notif of your phone is a tiny electric shock straight to your clit and your stupid heart.

and god they be texting JUST to text.

chan: my jacket looks better on u than it ever did on me lol hahaha u keeping it?

or shit like

chan: heyyy u eat yet today? i’m grabbing food rn u want anything i can drop off

chan: that was wild what u did. still thinking about it. thx. u good tho? fr

they’re angels.

minho: hi it’s minho

minho: u ok?

minho: thanks for stepping in

minho: text me if u need anything. seriously.

changbin: hey it’s changbin!!🥰 thanks again for saving lix seriously!!

changbin: u looked cute in channie’s jacket btw. u keeping it? u can have mine too if u want

boi NOT subtle but atleast cute with his little emojis.

changbin: we were talking about u earlier.

changbin: all good things promise

changbin: 😊

he’s a BABE. you would usually fucking block a man for using emojis but you know him (even if he doesn’t know that) and he’s so sincere that it turns you on.

hyunjin: heyy

hyunjin: i was thinkinh about u today

hyunjin: u sleep okay after everything?

hyunjin: miss seeing ur face alrdy. when u free?

han: y/n u awake?? u were so cool but also u were so shaky i’m worried lol

han: osrye

han: *sorry

han: sorry lol

felix: heyyy i’m felix u shot the guy on me

felix: i didn’t thank you then

felix: but seriously tysm i owe u my life fr

felix: how are u?

he just wants to talk.

seungmin: hey

seungmin: i was w the boys i’m seungmin

he was biting his nails shaking while he wrote that.

seungmin: u need anything let me know

the only reason the messages aren’t full of typos because he reread them a hundred times before sending because he wanted to look good. with the boys he’s all typos and doesn’t care.

jeongin: heyyyeyey i’m innie from the alley

jeongin: u free this weekend?

STRAIGHT to the point.

every single text makes your hands shake so bad you have to set the phone down and breathe. you’re shocked every time. actually shocked. they’re texting you. voluntarily. with dumb excuses. because they want to talk to you.

you have to sit down when hyunjin texts “thinking about you” or when chan offers to pick you up for coffee “no pressure but i wanna see that pretty face again.” you press their hoodies to your face and squeak into the fabric because this can’t be real.

you don’t know this yet, but they feel the same for you. well, not as hard, but they also have crushes on you.

charmed out of their boy minds. they talk about you constantly when they’re together. you’re always the topic. they’re just boys with crushes because you were badass.

little example, one night at chan’s place they’re all around when jeongin goes “bros i’m not even joking i played with myself aaaall night long thinking about y/n and that gun. came twice.“ oh they’re COMFORTABLE.

han and felix immediately start hugging each other on the floor, giggling and squealing. GROWN ASS MEN.

seungmin throws his head back, raking his nails down his face. “step on me dude.”

changbin leans forward. “she smelled so nice too.”

han falls forward. “SO NICE.”

they keep doing this. they want you around. they want to check on you, feed you, make you enjoy them, fuck you, hold your hand, make you their girl.

they’re charmed. that’s the best word. you charmed them.

take han, his little pathetic ass giggles and bites his fingers whenever he sends you a selfie. others the same but some of them used to be confident with girls. what happened??

you can’t believe they’re this into you. this is real. they like you back. all eight of them. you used to chase them and now they’re chasing you.

but the thing is, they’re so biased, so… dumb, so simple, that they simply don’t mind when you do end up doing something creepy. like oh, the gun was just a one time thing. they totally gotta be gentle with you, according to their logic. like hey u a little scary but that’s cute they want to pet you.

you do sick shit right in front of their faces and it doesn’t register to them. once you were meeting hyunjin and changbin for coffee (their idea) some loud ass guy at the next table was an ass then started loudly hitting on girls when changbin went to take a piss(bc the guy obviously didn’t have the balls to do it while changbin was there, and hyunjin didn’t seem threatening enough to him). you stood up, grabbed the guy’s scalding hot coffee, and poured it straight down the front of his pants.

poor changbin just came back and his pretty mouth fell open.

hyunjin pulled you back. “y/n that was mean… but like he did deserve it.”

they didn’t mind.

another time you headbutted some random guy so hard his nose exploded, then kneed him in the balls twice for good measure. he was provoking you, whatever.

chan looked at you with those dumb man eyes. “you okay? your forehead good?”

han was bouncing on his toes.

another time some weird, sketchy, most likely on drugs guy tried to talk to felix. you ripped the guy’s own knife out of his waistband, stabbed it through his hand pinning it to a wooden fence.

felix yelped (of course). seungmin actually clapped. smiled ear to ear.

you were at chan’s place for a movie night when han accidentally spilled soda on felix’s lap. felix joked “y/n would’ve shot me for that.” you deadass pulled the gun out of your bag, pointed it at felix’s forehead.

dead silence for half a second.

then they started squealing at how cute you are.

they’re this dumb.

anyways, the nine of you hang out now. they don’t notice shit. they definitely don’t notice that everytime you go over to their places you’re stealing more shit for yourself.

you “fall asleep” on chan’s couch during a movie so you can stay the night. while he’s sleeping you go through his drawers, steal a pair of his boxers, and take a photo of his search history on his laptop (“how to tell if a girl likes you”). you also lick the rim of the beer bottle he left on the nightstand. he wakes up, sees you curled up next to him, chuckles to himself(take a moment to imagine it, that’s dada) drool practically dripping about you, and goes back to sleep. the man ever.

you help hyunjin and changbin “clean” and end up alone in hyunjin’s room for ten minutes, you steal his hair from his hairbrush (you put it in a little ziplock you fucking psycho), sniff his pillow so hard you almost pass out, and another pair of socks. couldn’t find used ones. when changbin walks in you’re just sitting on the bed looking innocent. he’s mesmerized.

han lets you play his video games in his chair. that’s so cute. he goes to pee and you take photos of his search history too. (“how to ask a girl to sit on your face without sounding weird”) then you end up sitting in his lap in the chair. he bounces you, innocently. though there is a tension there, it’s mostly cute. (you’re slipping his used tissue out of his pocket and into yours)

then while minho is in the shower you go through his laundry and steal multiple things. you two talk after it like nothing happened, you’re just too good.

jeongin’s phone has face id. you had to pay extra attention to his code. got it tho. while he’s passed out drunk you go through it take a photo of every nude he’s ever sent.

but oh you know how to use men’s lust. so he wakes up hungover and sees you wearing his shirt, that was on purpose too. “you look good in my clothes, babe. keep it.” he has no idea you spent twenty minutes sniffing the inside of his dirty laundry basket and rubbed one out during.

same shit with the others. you’re unbelievably good at distraction. they’re all so charmed they don’t see that you’re fucking sick in the head. they don’t see this, they don’t see that, and they especially don’t see you licking blood off your fingers when one of them gets a papercut.

to them you’re just the protective little y/n who sometimes does crazy shit but it’s “so cute when she gets like that.”

dumb fucks.

you’re a major creep, a certified weirdo, and a full blown psychopath, robbing them blind, but they’re too busy being hypnotized, charmed, to notice any of it.

they’re developing brutal crushes on you. not just horny crushes (though there’s plenty of that), they genuinely like you. they think you’re sweet, pretty, funny in your own way, and the fact that you’re creepy… they be turned ON.

one of your favs is how felix acts. his parents love you so they leave you two alone sometimes in the house, those times you usually sit in felix’s lap while he’s at his desk, headset on, playing.

you love feeling him get harder and harder, knowing he’s trying to focus on the game. he whimpers into the mic once and mutes himself so fast.

after the round he always pulls his headset off, face flushed, not knowing what to do. you always tell him he did good. once he actually had to go out for a smoke just because you got him feeling that much.

you also discovered that minho really likes your hand on his thigh. like daddy gets turned on. you keep using that. he’s dying to bend you over.

and oh, was this even a doubt, you keep killing for them.

whenever some stupid bitch or asshole gets too close. last week a girl at the bar kept buying jeongin shots and touching his arm. like you can’t blame her, he’s the dream man, but you still followed her to the bathroom, smashed her head into the sink until she stopped moving, then left her there.

you killed a girl who kept flirting with hyunjin and changbin. another who sent felix nudes on discord. a cashier that rung seungmin up with a flirty smile. another one that han accidentally looked at on the street. (tf, too much y/n, too much.) you’ll keep killing anyone who tries to take even a second of them away from you.

but deep down you’re all such pussies. all nine of you. they like you. a lot. but tell you? never. pussies. can’t grow the balls. and you’re the biggest pussy of all, you’re crazy in love, but you couldn’t tell them if your life depended on it.

you’re at han’s and minho’s place on a random night. han is in the bathroom shaving, door open because we know they’re comfy with you. he’s standing there in just sweatpants, chest a little little hairy but the point is that there’s no shirt, dragging the razor over his jaw. cutie.

“you’re gonna cut yourself if you keep making that face.” you mumble.

han smiles at you in the mirror, breathtakingly beautiful, foam on his upper lip. “then you gotta kiss it better, y/n.”

and this is what we just talked about, he gets shy. he wants to say more, you can see it, but he chickens out and goes back to shaving.

you end up being all over minho at the end of that day. just sitting with him. on him. whatever. he wants to tell you he likes having you here. he doesn’t. pussy.

another night you’re at felix’s house, on your stomach on his bed. his mom made cookies and felix brought the whole plate up for you. you’re eating them while felix plays on his expensive ass setup across the room. he keeps glancing over. it’s cute. you two are a great match. this CRAZY bitch and her loser little boyfriend.

“these are really good.” you tell him. “tell your mom thank you.”

“she likes you. keeps asking when you’re coming over again.” he wants to say i like you too, instead he just scratches the back of his neck and says “stay as long as you want, okay?” he’s beautiful.

you hang out at jeongin’s and he makes you sit on his lap while he rolls a cig. he wants to tell you he’s catching feelings, that it’s not just his dick talking. he chickens out and offers you the cig instead. you always decline. he likes that. strokes your hair like chan does sometimes when you fall asleep with them.

but oh, they’re not stupid. well… they are, but not completely. allat shit they didn’t notice had to catch up sooner or later. you carried that gun like it was a purse. you never seemed scared.

at first they brushed it off. but one night at chan’s place, after you left, the eight of them got into this thing we humans feel sometimes, this you can tell anything rn to your friends, so they kinda go with the feeling while passing around a blunt.

jeongin took a hit, exhaled slowly. “…yo. be real with me. y’all ever think y/n might’ve actually killed people before?”

silence.

then han let out a nervous laugh. “dude. what the fuck. why would you say that?”

“because that guy in the alley, she… didn’t react. looks like she does that shit on the regular. i mean it was hot or whatever but still.”

felix shifted uncomfortably. “i mean… she saved my life. i’m not complaining. but yeah. i’m not saying she’s out here murdering people but… yeah.”

changbin nodded. hummed. adorable little noise.

chan leaned back, rubbing his jaw. “look, if she really is… you know… doing shit… she’s doing it for us.”

hyunjin kept his mouth shut about the little ex story of yours he still thinks is true.

seungmin sighed. stopped the breath. sighed again. “i don’t know man… she scares me sometimes. but not in a bad way. it’s fucked up. like… hot.”

minho and changbin hummed. han looked around, kinda creeped.

they all looked at each other, a little freaked, a little hard, a lot confused.

jeongin looked… really boyish, inexperienced, suddenly. “but… she’s y/n. if she’s killed people… i don’t think i care.”

it’s… nasty. like that’s the best word, nasty, or sad, kinda. they kinda get off on the danger, knowing you might be a murderer makes you powerful in their eyes, it makes them feel chosen. protected. dominated. like they’re the center of your violent little universe.

it feeds their egos. hard. it turns them on because it’s taboo, because it’s fucked up, because deep down some of them have that same fuckedupness(so not a real word) they’ve never admitted out loud. they’re all a little sick in the head, after all, just not as much as you are. like they’re playing with fire and the fire wants to fuck them.

they don’t mind.

which brings us to that night on the dark street next to the forest. it’s just you, seungmin and hyunjin. you three were walking back from grabbing food when some random drunk asshole stumbles out of the trees, clearly fucked up, and starts running his mouth.

you clearly didn’t like that. your demeanor changed so fast. there we go, here it was again. it usually happens like this, when your real personality and the act switch. it happens fast, really… noticeable.

that’s how he got his face slammed into the nearest tree trunk with brutal force by you. once. twice. blood sprayed. guy screamed. you kneed him in the stomach, then when he doubled over you stomped on the back of his knee so hard something snapped.

seungmin and hyunjin froze.

the guy was on the ground groaning, bloody, pathetic when you stopped. it was okay. everything was okay now, right?

hyunjin’s voice (barely)came out quiet. “…y/n.” he swallowed hard. his heart was pounding. part of him was terrified. the bigger part was so turned on he felt dizzy. he wanted to see it. needed to see it. “just kill him. do it.”

seungmin’s eyes widened. he looked freaked, at hyunjin because dude what the fuck, then back at you, mouth opening but nothing came out. the way you looked right now… turned him on. he felt sick. he felt alive. in danger. he felt like he was watching porn.

you pulled the gun out, clicked something on it, pressed it to the back of the guy’s head, and pulled the trigger.

bang.

the body slumped.

silence.

hyunjin and seungmin stood there with their hands over their mouths, eyes wide. scared, terrified. traumatized, definitely.

you turned to look at them, gun now looser in your hand, face slowly softening back into that familiar shaky expression that you have shown them a hundred times now.

hyunjin stepped to you, always going to you. his knees felt weak but he caught you when your own legs buckled.

the adrenaline, the release, the fact that they saw you, fucked you up. your hands started trembling. you had the audacity to act like this. you sick fuck.

“fuck… y/n.” he whispered.

he was scared, he was horrified, but mostly he was so in love it hurt. you trusted them enough to show this. you killed for them without blinking. he felt ashamed. thrilled.

seungmin stood a few steps away, still covering his mouth. he was scared to death, really was, this wasn’t a game anymore. but the idea that you were this dangerous, that you were an actual threat, this loyal, this okay with it, it made him want to worship you.

hyunjin cupped your face with both hands, thumbs brushing your cheeks. “it’s okay. we got you. we fucking saw.”

then he kissed you.

it was messy, not how good he usually kisses, he felt too much then to. he’d been dying to do it for weeks. his tongue pushed into your mouth almost at the very start of it, needy, he needed to consume the violence you just showed him.

you whimpered into the kiss, knees completely giving out. he had to hold you up with one arm around your waist, the other still cradling your face, your hands fisted in his shirt.

seungmin watched for a bit, shocked, terrified, traumatized. answer to that? grabbed your waist, spun you so hyunjin would have to get off you, and seungmin also kissed you. teeth, tongue, a little biting on your bottom lip because oh his fucking god. he loves his crazy bitch. but there was desperation. his hands were shaking as they gripped your hips, holding onto you. breathing, muttering “shit… shit…” between kisses.

hyunjin leaned in again, kissing the corner of your mouth while seungmin was still kissing you. then their lips met too.

a nasty, sloppy three way kiss. tongue. so much spit. heavy breathing. moaning into it.

hyunjin was whimpering softly into it, one hand still holding you upright, the other gripping the back of seungmin’s neck. he felt overwhelmed. protective for you, with pure lust. he couldn’t tell which was which.

he was terrified of what you were capable of. he was so in love he wanted to cry. he wanted to fuck you right next to the fresh body.

seungmin was obviously overwhelmed, kissing with his mouth always open and panting into it, one hand sliding down to grip your ass. or at least he hoped it was yours. okay, didn’t care. it was yours, though.

he felt disgusting for how turned on he was, he knew this was wrong, so wrong, but that only made it hotter. you killed a man in front of them.

for them.

tears were running down your cheeks from how much you felt, the love, the relief that they didn’t leave you, the genuinely fucking sick and disgusting thrill that they told you to do it.

it was too much, too new for you. everytime their tongues touched yours or each other you made a little sound, you had to, you were basically sobbing into the kiss. oh how that affected them.

hyunjin pulled back, panting on your lips, lost in this feeling. “fuck, y/n, what are you?”

seungmin didn’t pull back at all. he licked into your mouth again. “doesn’t matter. just… don’t stop.”

you didn’t.

this was it. they knew. they saw. and they kissed you anyway.

the news spread fast. the second they got the group together (after helping you hide the body and washing the blood off your hands, normal couple shit), they told the others everything.

told them you did it, that they told you to, that you no hesitation did it, that you’ve actually done this before(a lot, probably), that they couldn’t fucking help making out with you after.

they knew what you were.

they wanted you more.

so… your relationship with each of them developed, of course.

jeongin was just sooooo impatient!! couldn’t wait, couldn’t let the relationship develop, immediately poured all his emotions into being physical. which means, two nights after he heard the news he dragged you into his bathroom during a party at his place, locked the door, and pushed you against the sink. pretty little mouth open, panting. kissed you then. it was sloppy from the start, really was. tongue, teeth, him grinding on you, hands all over you, he smiled into the kiss. you make him unable to think straight.

two weeks later in chan’s kitchen with chan, you were walking with one of his hoodies from the laundry(to put it into your bag) when he walked in. he, wordless, backed you against the counter, urgent, big hands on your waist, and kissed you. quiet little groans and all, really human, really a desperate man. you couldn’t speak, that’s how much you were shaking, how new the emotions were. he kind of got that, had the suspicion that you had a problem with emotions. liked you the same. made him kiss you harder.

then. few days later hyunjin took you to a walk in the woods(why? felt romantic. trusted you not to kill him), held your hand the whole way, then pushed you gently to a tree and kissed you so softly at first it made you smile and your face crumble. you were fragile emotionally, collapses like these happened easily. it turned hungry fast, him whimpering into your mouth, hands sliding under your shirt, groping, loving, desperate. you two could barely part.

changbin took you on a drive in his nice car, omfg that car, parked somewhere, and just talked for hours to you. you kissed him there in the passenger seat, sweet, slow, lots of little pecks that turned into him licking into your mouth with a shaky moan. that was hot.

you almost fucked him right there, you weren’t far from it, but he was clearly nervous(though he felt the energy too) so you gave him more time.

felix was next. just fucking happy to be a mess. he invited you over, the usual, you sat on his bed, watched him play.

but the little dumb fuck just couuuuuldn’t behave. “i know what you did. hyune told us everything. and i… i… it’s, uh. not… bad.”

unsure fuck. it was obviously hard for him to get those words out. wanted to confess his love first place, this came out.

you ended up kissing him on his bed. he was shy at first, soft little pecks, then got into it better, sliding his tongue in even though he barely ever did that and wasn’t good at it. he whimpered the whole time. especially when you two laid back on the bed.

han was nervous. he invited you over when minho was gone and spent twenty minutes being a shy little fuck. obviously had a plan but missed the balls to act on it.

so you took it into your own hands, held his pretty face and kissed him. he wasn’t good at it, clumsy, inexperienced, giggling nervously into your mouth at first, but then melted into it.

you’re so scary. he likes you so much.

minho visibly started touching you more. wanted you even more then. you were at their place watching a movie, he waited until han fell asleep on the couch, then pulled you into his room, closed the door, and kissed you to half death.

his heart was hammering.

he really, really liked you. the exact way you were.

seungmin was… conflicted. if that’s the right word. after that night in the woods he got weird and distant for a few days, then showed up at your door.

you kissed him in your doorway, just missed him too much not to. he grabbed your face almost roughly while kissing you, obviously not about the kissing technique but about being close close close to you. he pushed you inside, kicked the door shut, kissed you against the wall. desperate.

group hangouts turned romantic. brutally intimate. kisses stopped being private, you’d make out with one of them in the kitchen while another watched. they started touching you more openly, and if the other saw that, he also had to touch.

jeongin hit first.

you were barely through his door when he dropped to his knees right there in the hallway. yanked your jeans down with shaky hands, acting like a fucking animal, fighting your panties off.

lil bitch hooked one of your legs over his shoulder while you were still standing and buried his face in your pussy. (bush or no bush, reader’s choice jeongin’s fine w anything, though it’s a bit more realistic for reader’s character to be shaven just for expecting something like this)

he loves pussy. genuinely loves it.

you got eaten the fuck out. like hello he sucked clit. moaned into you. where did he learn this from? (dumb question, you can trace his whole life back anytime)

you had to grip his hair to stay upright. he slipped two fingers inside you too, curling them, searching around, tongue flicking. you came standing.

only then did he stand, wiped his shiny chin with the back of his hand, and dragged you to his messy bed. (never makes it.)

little asshole was really in the mood but still nervous. he fumbled the condom twice before rolling it on. the sound he made then was adorable. after he finally pushed inside you he slipped out on the first thrust because he was shaking so bad.

“shit— sorry, fuck, you feel too good.” he hissed.

second try was better. he fucked you sooo good, deep, wanting you so bad, both hands on your thighs. came with the sweetest moans ever.

he felt blessed. laid with you, tangled in each other as aftercare, patted your hair and was all in his head about the fact that you kill people and let him bury his face in your cunt. boy be in loooove. like so in love that he allowed big amounts of physical touch, he never did that with any of his hoes before.

hyunjin was next, a few nights later. of course, he was the “first”, after all. deserved it. would have been the first to dick you down too if jeongin wasn’t this fucking impatient.

you were at your place. he found your vibrator by accident while reaching for something in your nightstand, and his eyes lit up. tongue poked out from between his plush lips, the way you love it so much.

then he smiled, beautiful, ear to ear. “well well, baby.” oh he’s experienced. and made for you. “can i?” he asked.

of course, hyunjin.

and laid back on the bed you were.

“let me see.” he whispered.

he took his time. stripped you, kissed down your body, pouring all the love he had for you since you made him fall in love in that forest, then clicked the vibrator on and pressed it to your nipples first.

had fun. had lots of fun with it, with you.

kept on teasing your nipples with his mouth, moved the vibrator down to your clit. lowest setting. when you started squirming around he turned it up, watching your face. unbelievably in love with you.

he kissed down your stomach, made you cum while laying his face on your thigh. he looked like an angel.

he is an angel. questionable morals, maybe, not a good guy at heart, but where does that matter to you.

when he finally fucked you, he kept telling you how perfect you felt. really meant it, even through the condom. your personality got him so unbelievably worked up. his hair fell into his face. it was beautiful. fucked you missionary while holding eye contact. sweet. attached, since the woods.

he held you for hours after, stroking your hair. felt lucky. so lucky it’s unable to be expressed by human words. another one not big on physical touch, great first twos, but it was so emotionally significant to him, you were, that he simply didn’t feel any discomfort.

oh chan waited until you were staying the night at his place. fingered you on the couch first while he kissed your neck. he was nervous too, his hands trembled when he laid you on his bed, when he took your shirt off.

when he finally fucked you in his bed it was manly. can’t stress this enough, this is a man. held your hands above your head, eyes locked on yours or where he was disappearing into you. truly a tummy flipping experience. he slipped out once, cursed under his breath, then slid back in with a low “there we go, sweetheart.” that alone barely made you cum.

afterward he held you so tight you almost couldn’t breathe.

this man gets hard thinking about how crazy you are. it makes protecting you and being protected by you feel like the hottest power exchange. he’s sick, pathetic.

minho was next. and loud. it was so wet, so wild, so physical. fucked you against the wall in his room while han was out. like it was that wild, typa wild where you two had to do it on the wall. like one hand around your throat. hello??? when he came he buried his face in your neck and let out this long, shaky groan in that baby little voice. yes sir.

he’s crazy for his genuinely fucked up girlfriend.

changbin was nervous. baby boy took you on another drive, parked somewhere dark, and before he even touched you he went “i’ve never… with someone like you… i don’t wanna fuck this up.”

you ended up in the backseat. he ate you out for so long you lost count of time, and he was moaning and whimpering the whole time, sounds nonstop.

“fuck you taste so good… can’t stop, baby, please let me keep going.” okay no complaint here.

he couldn’t stop making sounds. fucked you good, kept making little “ah fuck” and “you feel so good” sounds. he came so loud you had to cover his mouth. what if bigfoot hears and he’ll hurt hyunjin while fucking him??

changbin can barely bear with his big boy feelings for you. it feels so grown up and such a real life situation that he ends up being crazy in love, not a little crush anymore, this man can see his kids with you.

han… fucking hell, han. first you barely had his tip in your mouth for thirty seconds before he was whining “wait wait i’m gonna—” and shooting down your throat with the most pathetic, beautiful moan.

he was so embarrassed he hid his face in a pillow for five minutes.

when he finally fucked you he lasted maybe three minutes(came with a horrified “shit—oh, oh, sorry—“), trembling around, but he ate you out after.

he’s gotten better since that… kinda.

he’s in awe that someone as scary as you lets him touch you. it makes him grateful, like wdym you kill(so badass)(no han, not badass, a fucking crime) and willing to bounce on his dick. he’s the luckiest alive.

seungmin was soft and sensual and lowkey a bottom. your first time with him was slow and intimate, he let you take control, laid back while you rode him, hands roaming your body. worshipping, really. this man saw you kill.

he moaned so pretty, kept his eyes on you the whole time. couldn’t look away. when you choked him a little he came so hard his eyes rolled back and he cried out.

he’s surprisingly submissive once clothes come off. skinny hips bucking up desperately, letting you use him however you want. he feels safest with you being in control, your violence outside the bedroom makes him want to surrender completely inside it.

felix was such a pillow princess about it. last one to get fucked too.

your first time was on his fancy bed. he was so overwhelmed he kept saying “holy shit” and “you’re so hot” while you sank down on him. he was shaking. you pinned his wrists above his head and rode him until he was whimpering and moaning and crying out and other colleagues, whole body damp, begging you. when he finally came he kinda cried.

felix is lowkey terrified of you and that terror makes him so… submissive. he loves being at the mercy of his murderer girlfriend. he’s genuinely so in love with your personality that he brags about you to everyone and everything, he’s dumb, but not dumb enough to let it slip that his beautiful girlfriend murders people, so it’s safe. kinda.

it’s the fact that you’re this sick in the head. that gets them so crazy. well, it’s not just a kink, it’s psychological, it’s a man thing in their heads. they feel chosen, protected. wanted in a way no normal girl could ever want them.

you could kill anyone else in the world but you choose to be like this with them. you kill for them.

they acknowledge this.

makes them crazy in love. it makes them feel like their pure nature, which, all eight’s, is just pathetic little boys, after all. it makes the sex better, it makes everything more intense.

minho is the one you enjoy sex with the most. lowkey the autistic bad bitches of the group. so perfect match.

when you fuck it’s intense, animalistic, and both of you get so loud it’s embarrassing. you’re always moaning and screaming, nails digging into his back, telling him to fuck you harder while your eyes roll back. what that does to that man? gets him two times louder.

the first time you two really let go, han knocked on the wall with a “you guys okay in there???”

two weird intense people at each other. he matches that unsettling energy you have(except you’re true evil and he’s just a little weird but whatever). best dick. best connection. no contest.

but of course you still love the others just the same!!

sex or no sex, you would truly die for them.

okay, but sex. like jeongin is unreal with his fingers. one night he had you bent over the couch, two fingers in your pussy and one slowly working into your ass while he ate you out from behind. he was weeeeirdly good at it. patient, lots of lube, murmuring “relax baby, i got you.” it felt good but strange. you’d already came three times before so your body just tapped out after half an hour. you whined “innie… can’t… too much” and he immediately stopped, kissed your back, you told him another time when you’re not spent. instant agree from him. he’s such a eager pussy lover it’s ridiculous.

chan has brutal kinks. even the lightest one is how he likes fucking you from behind with a hand fisted in your hair, spanking you, hard, leaving marks. genuinely railing you.

one time he edged you for almost an hour until you were sobbing and threatening to stab him. he laughed at you.

careful with aftercare though, truly all about you.

they’re truly addictive, that’s exactly why you’re always just needy as fuck.

they’re helpless.

one afternoon chan’s on a serious work call on his couch. who cares, you drop to your knees between his legs and start mouthing at his dick through his pants.

he glares down at you, mutters “give me one second” into the phone, then mutes it.

“y/n i’m in the middle of a fucking meeting—” he growls, hand in your hair.

you look up at him, battling your eyelashes.

he folds.

chan always folds, this is very important.

he ends up fucking your throat while still half paying attention to the call. slaps you when you gag so you’ll stay quiet.

or like poor felix is studying for a big test, books everywhere, stressed as fuck. you crawl onto his lap, grinding on him, tugging at his shirt.

“lixie, please, need you.”

he’s sweating. “baby i have this test in two days— fuck— okay just… just real quick.” he ends up bending you over his desk, fucking you fast while trying to read his notes over your shoulder. it’s fucking hilarious. this guy’s whole existence is hilarious.

or hyunjin is painting in his room, focused, music, whatnot. you come in, tugging at his sleeve, whining.

“baby i’m in the zone right now—” is what he goes on about until you shove your hand down his pants and he drops the brush.

ends up fucking you against the wall, moaning into your neck. you and your loud men against the world.

han is the easiest. you don’t even have to ask. you walk into his room while he’s gaming, tug his hair(no like that’s really all it takes), and he immediately drops the controller. “okay okay— fuck— hi baby.” he whines out, already pushing your panties aside.

jeongin is usually down but sometimes he’s also on the game. you sit on his lap facing him, grinding, holding his face and trying to turn it towards you, and he has the audacity to keep playing?? yeah lasts about four minutes before he throws the controller. “you need it right now? yeah? c’mere.”

changbin will literally pause whatever he’s doing. “you need me baby? okay, come here, i got you.” he’s the most… pathetic is not even the right word, most down for you.

seungmin’s nonchalant ass is the same mentally, but not on the outside. you tug at his shirt while he’s on his laptop, whining. he grumbles “i’m busy, y/n” but two minutes later he’s got you bent over the couch anyway. can’t say no to you.

none of them can. especially minho. he’s another who never even denies you first place, he’s the luckiest man alive for having you, after all. (you’re having him)

they love that their girlfriend is this sick. they really don’t feel bad about it, they’re dumb boys, they have zero ethics for this.

even if you… you come back bloody sometimes.

not every kill, but it does happen. they freak out. like their beautiful girlfriend has blood on her, lots.

chan usually recoils, eyes huge. “jesus fucking christ y/n—” he presses the back of his hand to his mouth because he might throw up.

he’s a normal guy at heart. blood belongs on scraped knees and paper cuts, the shit this sweetie grew up with with his perfect little life, not covering his beautiful girlfriend.

hyunjin gags, turning his head away for a second. “baby… there’s so much, fuck, it’s in your hair.”

felix looks genuinely green. “i can smell it. oh my god i can smell it.” he has to sit down on the couch and put his head between his knees for a minute.

jeongin’s face twists in pure disgust. “you look like you took a bath in the dude. that’s… that’s a lot of blood, babe. holy fuck.”

changbin actually looks like he’s fighting tears from how grossed out he is. “we need to get you cleaned up right now. like right now. i can’t— i can’t look at it too long.”

seungmin runs his hands down his face(imagine the oh my fucking god bro picture), turning away.

han makes a high nervous sound and hides behind minho, peeking out. and minho, looks nauseous. actually turning his face away.

they’re all disgusted by the blood, deeply. it makes their stomachs turn and their skin crawl, blood outside the body is supposed to be something wrong, well this is wrong.

none of that disgust ever touches their love for you.

not even a little.

they’re disgusted by the blood, genuinely grossed out, they’re normal ass boys who grew up with moms who made them wash their hands before dinner. blood is supposed to stay inside bodies. but never once are they disgusted by you. not even a little.

you earned this devotion.

…you, also, kinda soft launched that you liked them since the woods. well, soft launched it by not telling the whole story, just that oh you did almost end up taking up on their offer and did see them and they were cute then then ooooh sometimes you saw them around but were too much of a pussy to walk up to them… sure. they told you they don’t care. that they’re not mad. anyways, you also told hyunjin that you didn’t actually bury an ex. that they were your first boyfriends. he took it so good.

they love your ass too much to get creeped out by this.

and now that we’re at the ass topic, hyunjin literally loves your ass.

he’s always groping you. not even sexually always, you’ll be standing in the kitchen taking to one of the others and he squeezes a greedy handful while walking past, on his phone, combined with a little kiss on the side of your head. or while you’re watching something. while you’re brushing your teeth. both hands full of your ass. happy boy. content boy.

he eats it serious asf too. loves having you face down, ass up, tongue buried deep in your asshole while he moans like he’s the one getting eaten out(oh, that’s… a nice thought. you two will explore that later too). he once ate your ass for almost forty minutes straight until you were shaking and crying into the pillow.

jeongin is a close second place there. he’ll smack it everytime you walk past.

“can’t help it baby, it’s right there looking at me.”

chan loves gripping it hard when he fucks you from behind, big hands holding you, sometimes spreading you open while he rails you, his eyes rolling back at the combined feeling of you around him and in his hands.

the others ranked would be changbin then, minho, seungmin, han and then felix but only because he’s such a boob guy that it completely overpowers it.

they’re men.

you’re a predator. like an actual fucking predator, not human in your mental senses. you could kill anyone, you’ve proven it. but you chose them. in their boy brains that’s the ultimate compliment, it gets them so going, so attached to you.

nothing could ever turn them off when it comes to you. not the fact that you confess that you killed for them before, not the way you steal their things, not when you get overwhelmed.

last one happens a lot. because just again, you didn’t have real feelings before them. you told them that already.

so your emotional system is fucked up. like barely functional, that fucked up. when too many feelings wake up at once it just crashes you the fuck out and activates a fight or flight in your body. you’re weird then. they still love you.

to demonstrate these lil crash outs, let’s say you’re at felix’s house, sitting on his bed while he’s lying next to you. on his laptop. you’re watching his side profile, the perfect little nose he got so lucky with, that he’s shirtless and this flawless looking(you don’t care that he’s dumb) and then it makes your heart ache. this overwhelming wave of love and obsession and disbelief that this dreamy unreal dickhead is yours. all of them are yours.

and this feeling gets so hard these times that you have to so something about it. in this case, your hand grabs his skinny arm, pure adrenaline and sadness in your inexperienced body.

you squeeze, hard, shaking it a little, tears spilling down your pretty cheeks.

“whoa, whoa, y/n. hey, hey what the fuck—” his deep voice cracks as he turns to you, like imagine the voicecrack, eyes wide. he looks so panicked, one hand hovering. he doesn’t know whether to hug you or call an ambulance. “baby what’s wrong? did i do something? are you hurt? talk to me.”

“eeeeeeeeeeee—”

“eee what??”

dipshit.

you keep squeezing his arm and vibrating.

he eventually just pulls you on top of him, arms wrapping around you. “okay. okay. you’re okay. i’m here. breathe or… keep doing this. that’s fine too.”

he almost shit himself from fear. this boy was genuinely made for you.

all of them were.

or like with hyunjin you’ll be cuddling and suddenly the love hits so hard you bury your face in his neck and squeeze him as tight as you can, squealing around.

hyunjin usually rubs your back. he loves when you do this on him, makes him feel needed.

chan lets you hit him those times, maybe it’ll help. never does. settles with caressing your back and arms until you calm down. dada knows how to handle you. his psycho gf.

minho is the best at it, absolutely. he hums to you, or when in bed, wraps his arms and legs around you. lets you shake and cry and make whatever noises you need to. it’s an amazing solution.

changbin just wants to provide for you then. gets worried every single time but calms down real soon because he knows you’ll calm down too, that you’re fine, that you’re just a little… new to this. he can offer you ice cream he bought only for you(saw it in movies, that’s why it’s so simple) and getting all eight of them in one bed. he’ll list shit he could do for you, not shutting the fuck up while you’re having a meltdown on his chest.

oh seungmin is just a softie for his sick little gf. you grabbed his shirt once and started shaking while he was trying to cook. he sighed, turned the stove off, and just pulled you to him. “you’re so fucking weird… c’mere.” he lets you cling to him until it passes.

han panics. han’s dumb. han tries his best tho. ends up just hugging you so tight you can barely breathe while making nervous little noises with you, rocking, bouncing you a little. the little bug he is.

jeongin finds it hilarious. even more adorable. you once climbed on top of him while he was playing something, grabbed his face with both hands and just stared at him intensely while tears ran down your cheeks. he paused the game immediately.

“well hello. you good or are we having another crash?”

you just nodded and kissed him stupid. he smiled into your mouth. you love the smell of his skin.

they know now that your brain literally didn’t have this much feeling before them. sometimes it’s love so strong it feels like pain. sometimes it’s fear that something will happen. sometimes it’s just pure overwhelming joy. sometimes it’s having to slap on hyunjin’s chest(he always takes it) and telling him to not go into the woods because bigfoot will fuck him(he never understands what you’re on about). sometimes it’s sadness and going crazy and having to rip your two arms off yourself then stumble into their chests.

and they deal with it so well. surprisingly well. that’s because they’re truly wired with you. crazy little connection y’all got there.

they never get tired of it either, if anything they seem proud bc c’mon they’re the ones who finally made the emotionless girl feel something. it feeds their egos. they did that. they cracked your heart open and… cracked you in general. lmfao.

they could never love you less.

never. ever.

you earned this for yourself. you made this. you got yourself this little harem.

and there is no other women for them now.

only y/n.

author’s note: me di un beso de tres tiktok trend on y/n hyunjin and seungmin NOW. also reader is a horrible person, never do this guys ever ever, i’m so serious. if you do shit like this you’re a creep. this is a story made for appeal and entertainment and was requested but doing it irl is seriously too much. anyways han part two is coming i’m sorry for the long wait for that :(

so, rightfully, the eight boys started to develop some serious kind of… fixation on you.

channie and hyunjin are first place here, obviously. chan more, so hyunjin is a second place, maybe. but both of them because they got you taken away from them when they needed more, you took yourself away from them.

but chan remembers how you cried out when he pulled your ass open. and hyunjin… has just been extra pissy. little immature brat, that’s what he is.

third is felix. you see, felix has been into porn for years. like we can even say a light addiction. he’s also chronically online as fuck. he’s seen everything, a good example is the ankha zone video back in the day(jerked off to it more than once), hardcore stuff, soft stuff, he’s been exposed to most of it, has seen every category, every fetish, every little scenario you can imagine. his brain is working dumb from years of dopamine highs.

and now, now he has a real, living, breathing, pretty workplace crush who apparently sucks dick great.

not a good combination.

psychologically, especially. porn addiction already desensitizes the reward system, normal sex doesn’t hit the same anymore. but then you show up, sweet, helpful, competent, and suddenly the fantasy comes into reality. his brain starts mashing the two together. you handing him water becomes “what if she dropped to her knees right here?” you bending over to pick something up becomes “what if i grabbed her hips and…” he’s stuck in this loop where every innocent interaction gets filtered through thousands of hours of porn. it’s making him stupid. making him horny. dumb. a boy.

he’s got a weird fixation on staff hoodies now because of you. keeps imagining you on your knees in the hoodie you own, you riding him while still wearing it, you letting him cum on your face after a long day and some getting on the hoodie.

you do catch the fact that he’s kind of different because of this, different around and about human bodies, when someone mentions his religion, but you just got to the conclusion of him being a little on the spectrum about interaction maybe or he got bad influence from somewhere. no idea that it’s about addiction, that it’s about porn.

during one long break he’s sitting in the corner scrolling on his phone, his headphone on pretty head, but when you walk past he looks up. his eyes go over your body, undressing you with them. there’s this not quite here look in his eyes for a tiny bit before he blinks it away and gives you that usual beautiful smile that just charms everyone when he sees that you came to interact with him.

you hand him something he asked for earlier. you get a “thanks, y/n.” you notice the way his hand tightens on his phone. don’t know though that it’s because he’s fighting the urge to palm himself right there.

porn brain + real girl he wants = a fucking mindfuck for such a guy like him. his brain does not rest on the topic, it’s all you on your knees, you bent over, you taking multiple of them(such a favorite of his), all these he’s conditioned himself to crave. but now with you. all of these next to the brutal stress, of course.

the rest of them aren’t much better, they’re just less online about it. they’re all just boys.

fourth would be jeongin. he heard you and chan that night, after all. he looks up at chan too, at hyunjin. plus you’re hot. mix this together and you get jeongin wanting some of you like now. his dumb little brain needs it, and that dumb little brain controls the body, which just feels, works crazy because of you now.

then changbin, maybe. first he thought about himself as not brave enough for this whole thing, but then… but then fuck’s sake, he’s a grown ass man. a grown ass man with money, talent, a career, brutal sized arms, and what genuinely gets every woman off their feet, a fucking nice car. so now with that confidence he sometimes gains, his mind is easier to set on the thought of you. now he’s thinking about you aaaaaall day, such a babe, like has his elbow on the table and his pretty chin in his hand zoning out typa thinking about you all day.(chan is shouting at him to pay attention)

han can try and maybe relieve that tension in himself with being physical. that’s his best solution for this. keeps hugging you longer, gives you goodmorning and bye y/n hugs, pressing his body on yours, smelling your hair. like specifically smelling your hair, the creep. he feels like you’re the cure to his stress(since you helped the others) and now he wants to actually get to it. if you made it better for chan(chan did tell the boys lots about it, they’re really honest with each other) and hyunjin(same here, these boys overshare when not waiting until their roommate is away to get his dick sucked by the girl that said roommate also wants, khm hyunjin khm). he especially really needs the release you can give them, he’s not feeling particularly well these days, that only you can give them.

seungmin has jacked it to you double digits times now, acts like nothing’s up the next day. he’s actually good at it. well, all of them are, they were trained to hide themselves, to hide the realness. so he hides his aching, obsessive sexual want towards you, like nothing is up with him, like him and felix are not talking basically only about you when they’re home. like yeah everything’s fine he’s not obsessed with the idea of you getting him off, nooo, pfft.

minho’s the last on this list but only because he’s the most intelligent of them. so, like, he still needs you, bad, but he’s more of a man, doesn’t roll around in his bed and giggle at home like some(han, felix, changbin) do about you, his little fixation is actually the most active, most torturing when you’re actually in front of him. but then, it’s bad.

they’re all just boys at the end of the day. we already talked about this in the first part, biology. testosterone. dopamine. vasopressin. evolution. what you have signals good mate material. same drill we’re already over, great ass good for birthing, soft tits good for feeding, warm mouth that doesn’t complain(any man’s dream), bla bla bla. add the insane pressure they live under, no privacy, constant performance, zero release, it’s only natural, normal, that one(1) good blowjob turns into this whole blow up in their little circle.

and you have the knowledge of exactly how chan felt grinding against your soaked pussy and how hyunjin moaned when he came down your throat. it’s almost an equal power situation, they have power over you, and you also have power over them, both in different ways. they’re technically more powerful than you, but if you wanted to seduce(which you never intended, they became attracted on their own), you’d have them wrapped around your pinky in a move. well, you already kinda have them like that, but there’s a significant difference between you having intention to do this and not.

they can act mature and calm all day, they can be flawless for the cameras, but the second their brains register this girl lets us cum, they’re just losers, it’s years of suppressed sexual frustration and sudden access to a willing mouth. like sudden access. if this happened a little slower, maybe they would have themselves together a little better, maybe they would be more cool headed. but they’re not, because this happened fast, and that also turns them so on.

you’re in the middle of eating in your bed at 10:47pm when your phone buzzes. it’s jeongin. you just have him saved as in. almost was boss in, but you didn’t feel that funny that day.

in: hey y/n

in: sorry for texting so late

in: can u help me with something? it’s about banking stuff and transferring money. u always handle everything so well so i thought maybe u could explain it to me? i’m kinda lost lol

you stare at the message, food pouring out of your mouth, basically. it’s a lame excuse and you both know it.

you: sure i’ll come over quick.

same night, later now, you’re standing outside jeongin and chan’s dorm again. hm, the great memories here.

it’ll be quick. professional. just like the other times. help the boy with his “banking stuff” and go home.

jeongin opens the door looking nervous as fuck. he’s in a black hoodie and gray sweatpants, not because he’s calm like that, it’s because he knows that women find it hot, he wants to look good, he’s this simple with technique, hair messy. he’d been running his hands through it.

“thanks for coming.” he mumbles, not meeting your eyes at first, stepping aside quickly, eyes more on your body now that you’re dressed more casually. looks good on you. “sorry it’s so late.”

“hm, it’s fine.”

“uh, chan’s not home. yet. he’s working late.”

you know. he sent you home himself.

it’s tidier now than last time. you don’t know which of them’s hand was in it but whatever, you kind of know it’s because of you. so the place will look good in your eyes.

you walk in, he closes the door behind you. it’s new, that it’s just you and jeongin. you never had this place like that yet.

he gives an awkward little “uh” sound, gestures with one hand with the other pin straight next to him, then walks towards his room so you’ll follow him. you do.

in there he tells you to “uh, sit down.” waving towards his bed. okay.

you sit on the edge of it, looking up at him. he stays standing for a second, shifting on his feet, then he sits down next to you, hands clasped in his lap.

“so… about the banking thing.” you start gently.

“i lied.”

“hm?”

he rubs the back of his neck, typical boy thing to do. “i… i heard you. with chan.”

oh.

that’s immediately different.

your stomach does a little flip. this is just an apartment, not a castle. of course. you’d completely forgotten how easily sound travels in these places.

“i woke up to get water and… i heard you. both of you.” he needs to get it out before he dies of shame. “i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to listen. the walls are so thin and i… i couldn’t stop listening. i don’t know. yeah. sorry. i don’t know.”

you sit there for a second, processing. then you do what you do best, you turn into the nice one. the caretaker. reach over and gently put your hand on his knee. “hey… it’s okay. really. did it upset you? be honest.”

he shakes his head. “no. not upset. just… surprised. fuck, i’m sorry. this is so weird. you probably think i’m a creep. i’m sorry.”

you squeeze his knee gently, smiling a little. “i don’t think you’re a creep. it’s normal to feel a lot of things about that. are you mad at chan? or at me?”

“not mad at all.” he says quickly, looking at you, eyes wide. well, wide compared to how his eyes usually are. “i just… i don’t know. he didn’t tell us about that. he told us about when you… first… did it for him, but not about this.” he moans, covers his face with both hands. “god i sound so stupid right now.”

he’s so fucking hot. you remember how good he looked that one night in just boxers, little sleepy, way more casual than how he is now.

you rub his knee soothingly. “you don’t sound stupid. it’s okay. really. if you’re curious about what happened, then almost nothing more than the… ‘first’ time he told you guys about.” you still didn’t simply forget that he told them. fucker. “there was… shit, this is weird to say, little more physicality, but no… actual sex if you’re thinking that. calm down.”

he peeks at you through his fingers, so red. “you’re so nice. you always are. that’s part of the… problem.” talking bout some problem, he really just can’t get it out what he wants to say, that’s why he talks so… cringe would be the right word? no, well it doesn’t feel like that at the moment, but he’s gonna be wanting to sink into the ground from embarrassment the next day though.

“what’s the other part?” but you’re good at playing along, at moving at the same level they are when it’s needed. like you get second hand embarrassment from felix so many times but still have the chemistry with him.

he lowers his hands slowly, biting his bottom lip, muttering “that i really want what chan got. sorry.”

now he looks embarrassed and relieved to have said it out loud. his eyes keep going to your mouth, then away, he can’t help it.

good fucking thing you shaved this morning. you’d done it in the shower with this exact possibility in the back of your mind. so, not because you’re a hopeless slut, but because you’re selfaware enough to know that with this situation going on between the nine of you, at least one more was probably going to try his luck soon. so you were practical. responsible, even.

“if you want, i can help you too. that’s okay.”

“yeah?”

“yeah. and, y’know, this isn’t emotional. none of this is an emotional thing, i’m just… helping. same as with chan. same as with hyunjin. i don’t mind. that’s it.”

he nods quickly, he’s gorgeous. that’s the right word for this man, gorgeous. “yeah. yeah, i get it. just helping. i’m okay with that. really. yeah. yeah. yeah.”

“so like, don’t overthink. this is as casual as me giving you guys water. as casual as a cat on the street. as a shirt, as a recording, as a condom, as a—“

you’re saying more, mature, but he’s not listening anymore. he stopped when you said condom, did he hear that right? condom? thinking she’s already thinking that far?

“o-oh! yeah— condom, right— fuck, okay—” he fumbles across the bed, like a fucking baby deer on ice the fucking loser, nearly falling off as he yanks open his bedside drawer. digs through it fast, loud, and finally yanks out a foil packet. he throws it onto the bed, then practically jumps back into his original spot, chest heaving.

there we go. the condom is out in the open.

“relax, innie.” you chuckle. you’re breathtaking. you’re such a great woman, fuck.

he nods again. then, after a few seconds of nervous silence “um… eh, uh, can i… eat you out first?”

oh?

(of course he wants to. selfish at his core. he doesn’t just want to make you feel good, he wants to bury his face in your pussy, taste it, smell it, lick it. the only way it’s about your pleasure is his ego being built by making a woman feel good.)

“yeah, okay.”

his pretty mouth drops. he closes it. swallows. “uh… can i… move you? is that fine?” he asks. “i promise i’ll be gentle.”

you nod.

he gets up on his knees, hands shaky. he gently takes your waist and helps guide you further onto the bed.

“um… can you get on your knees for me? please?”

you do. you move onto all fours.

he makes a little “nhh” sound behind you. likes this, clearly. then he puts a hand on your upper back and gently pushes your chest down onto the mattress, leaving your ass up in the air. his touch is awkward. you’re his assistant, for fuck’s sake.

“like… like this? is this comfortable?” he asks.

“perfect.”

fuck his fucking life fucking now. fucking hell he’s horny.

his sheets smell like him and boy. you can feel him kneeling behind you, hands still on you.

“you look really pretty like this.” he whispers. “can i…?”

you answer with a “mhm” and by arching your back a little more, pushing your ass toward him.

“okay… okay.” he whispers, mostly to himself.

and then his hands slide up to pull your pants down. his hands are shaking. he pulls your pants down slowly, dragging them over the curve of your ass. what a pretty ass. when he gets them to your thighs he pauses, just staring. your panties look good on you. then he keeps going, tugging them all the way off your legs, reaching back up to get your panties too, now pulling the two down together. he takes both off completely. not for your comfort. definitely not. he wants them gone completely so nothing is in his way, so he can look at all of you without anything blocking his view. he wants full access. it’s for his ego, the satisfaction of having you bare and exposed for him, someone lower than him socially, financially, physically, nothing in the way.

once your lower half is completely naked, he’s just staring directly at your pussy. thinks it’s beautiful. suits you. so pretty, your soft folds, your clit peeking out, your inviting little asshole just above it all, cherry on top really.

“you’re so pretty.” he mumbles. thanks, mr this is all professional, we appreciate your love for women’s bodies here. his hands grab your asscheeks and gently spread you open wider so he can get an even better look.

“hm. thanks.” you whisper.

he’s shaking, really is. both because this is new, this is hot, and also because he’s so turned on. you can feel his breath, hot, uneven because he’s so full of nerves, on your exposed pussy.

he leans in slowly, and presses the softest little kiss on your folds.

then gives you a lick to start off with, flattening that breathtaking tongue, dragging from your clit all the way up, parting your folds.

he moans loudly into you. then he does it again, licks up again. and again. longer, wetter, dragging his tongue through every inch of your pussy. of his little assistant’s pussy.

he pushes his face in deeper, nose pressed into your entrance, shaking his head from side to side so his tongue rubs messily all over your clit and folds. sounds like pure sex, stomach flipping, slurping, moaning, the slick noise of his tongue lapping at you.

you feel good, really good, but you know this isn’t about making you cum. this is all for him. every moan, every lick is him stroking his own ego. he’s eating your pussy because he wants to. because he feels good in the fact that he has the girl who sucked off chan and hyunjin bent over on his bed with her pussy in his face.

he settles on his flawless flat little stomach on the bed. his hands spread your ass wider and he buries his face deeper, smearing your juices all over his mouth, nose, and chin.

he drags his tongue higher, experimentally licking over your asshole. it’s clumsy, curious, a little shy, but he likes it so he does it again, slower, circling the rim with the tip of his tongue while his hands keep your ass spread wide open for him.

but he goes back to your pussy. he’s obsessed with it. it’s pretty, cute, maybe even perfect, in his opinion. he pushes his tongue inside your entrance, fucking it in and out, feeling your walls flutter around him. fuck yes. pornographic. starts licking with licks that cover your entire cunt. long ones from clit to hole, smaller flicks right into your entrance, gentle sucks on your folds, lightly sucking on your asshole when he’s there.

but he’s not there much. he’s aaaall up in your vag, always going back there, now you can feel his nose bumping into your asshole as he buries his face deeper, tongue going back inside you, trying to reach as far as possible.

“mmh— good, good…” he mumbles into your pussy, voice muffled. he starts shaking his face in it again, almost aggressive, tongue all up in you, sucking you in.

he grabs your hips better and pulls you back onto his face, literally sitting you on him while he lies on his stomach a little more, arches his neck back better.

now your pussy is completely smothering his mouth. tongue fucking in and out of it, nose rubbing your little asshole as he makes you ride his face. has jeongin ever been happier?

his eyes actually roll back in pleasure. his chin keeps brushing your clit from below, giving you these random little almost nothing sparks of pleasure while his tongue works inside you. everytime he pushes his flawless tongue as deep as it can go, his nose pokes firmer into your asshole and he lets out these little blissful whimpers, manly moans.

he’s so into it. not focused on your pleasure beyond how it feeds his own ego.

his arms tighten around your thighs, pulling you even harder on his mouth. he’s practically suffocating himself in your pussy and loves it. so wet sounds fill the room as he laps and sucks and tonguefucks you, just… without any real rhythm.

and even though it feels really fucking good, you know that you’re not even close to cumming. because you know the truth too, that this isn’t for you. this is all for him. this is jeongin getting his fix.

he’s getting exactly what he wants. selfish.

he’s in heaven though. you feel him smiling into your cunt as he’s currently trying to probably, what, suck everything out of it?

mr wait until marriage is currently telling you “mmph— fuck— mmh—” as his pretty little mouth goes down to suck on your clit, his nose pressing straight into the source of your wetness now. laps at it, drinks at it, then goes back into your entrance to eat at that too.

he feels so good. never better. really. he’s eating the same pussy chan and hyunjin got. well, not really, innie, they didn’t get any actual pussy, but that’s not what he thinks about now. he thinks he’s as good as his hyungs now.

even though he’s even better, kinda. like, you wouldn’t let hyunjin do this. chan, hm, maybe, but you stopped that even at just grinding. well, that was because feelings and tension were clearly getting involved, but whatever. not the point. maknae gets pussy. others don’t.

maknae fucks that pussy with his tongue, that perfect muscle of his curling up, trying to scoop out everything he can get. then he pulls back, spits on your pussy (messy and loud), and pushes his face back in, sucking on your folds, licking up and over your clit, then moving up again to shove his tongue back into you. his hands spread your ass again, he lost grip. hurts. feels nice too. his nose keeps rubbing on your asshole, he seems to love that too, the way it twitches in his face.

it’s intimate. he doesn’t process it as that. he just processes it as pussy. you process it as something you get paid for. win win.

he pulls his tongue out of your hole and drags it up sensually, circling your asshole again. this time he’s less shy about it. he licks over the tight little muscle slowly, then presses the point of his tongue in it. he sucks gently on it too. that makes your whole body jolt.

makes you moan.

oh?

feels good. he’s doing great.

he almost cums from your moan then goes back to your pussy, he can’t stay away for long anyway. his tongue fucks back into your entrance, exploring that again, your walls, chin on your clit, his nose in your asshole. it’s overwhelming for both sides.

then his fingers join the party. he slides one finger into your pussy, pushing it in deep immediately(so he doesn’t gently work it in or anything, it just slips inside) while he pulls away to watch it. he moans at how warm and wet you are inside, loves it.

he adds a second finger quickly, pumping them in and out. no rhythm. not much pleasure from it, for you. plenty for him, for his little soul. just thrusting them in and out.

he was a horrible student, you can tell. back in sex ed he probably stared at the ceiling the whole time. everything he knows about eating pussy came from other guys bragging in the dorm, from porn.

he remembers the clit thing suddenly, women like that, right?

“oh shit— right.” he mumbles, more to himself than you.

his tongue finally moves down and finds your clit with an actual purpose now(right now he wants to feel like he’s as good as chan and hyunjin. he wants to prove he can make you feel good too, even if it’s mostly for himself). at least he hopes he does, he’s in the right place, right? (he is.) he sucks on it gently at first, then harder, why didn’t he think of this when he was there before, smiles on it when you moan. he likes to hear that. his fingers keep fucking into you during, curling awkwardly, searching for something he’s not even sure how to find.

but god, he really wants this. he wants to devour you. currently humping the bed under himself too.

having you bent over on his bed, face down, ass up, pussy dripping on his tongue while he fingers you, it makes his head spin. makes him crazy. confident. wild. he feels like he finally caught up to his hyungs. like he’s one of the big boys now.

he pulls his fingers out to spread your ass again with both hands, staring at your holes, then spits on your asshole and licks it again, pushes the tip of his tongue inside again, moaning into you. would die for this taste.

then he pulls away with one last little kiss, goes back to your pussy, sucking your clit again, taking his hands off your perfect little ass and pushing three fingers inside your vag this time, giving little “uhhn” sounds to your clit.

he pulls his fingers out just so he can shake his face between your legs again, smearing your wetness all over his mouth, nose, and chin. he’s loud with his breathing, the little noises.

he has a beautiful voice.

his tongue pushes back inside your hole, fucking you. his eyes roll back in pure bliss at the smell of you, your little asshole(made for him, in his humble opinion) right on his nose. this position is making him feel like nothing else.

each sound you make makes him more confident in himself, every gasp, every whimper, every shaky breath. this is good for his mental health, actually. he’s been through a lot, has been extra stressed nowadays too. this is just perfect now.

he pulls back, gasping for air, face shiny and flushed, lips swollen. his eyes are glassy, pupils so big as he stares at your dripping pussy. he’s in a trance. then dives back in. like so deep that you can feel his teeth, the way his jaw works. you can feel his slurping, feel the “mmh— mmh—” noises he gives into you. just takes from you, that’s what he’s doing.

he’s so fucking happy right now. he’s so proud of himself it’s pathetic.

but you’re getting tired of this shit.

it feels good, sure. his tongue is warm and feels funny and he’s hitting some nice spots by pure accident. but you know exactly that jeongin is using your pussy to jerk off his mental health. he’s just living out his fantasy of being “one of the guys.”

so you put on your best performance, which you’re good at, and start gasping loudly, thighs shaking around his head. your hand flies back, into his hair, and you tug gently, pulling his face away from your dripping cunt.

“woah— wait, innie, too much.” you moan breathlessly, making it sound like he just rocked your entire world. “fuck, you’re… you’re really good at that.”

he pulls back, panting hard, face shiny from nose to chin with your juices. his little lips swollen and red and open. he looks dazed. hit.

you sit up a little, turning your head to look back at him. “you’re gonna make me real tired if you keep going like that…” you lie sweetly, a little shaky like you’re overwhelmed. you’re not. “but what about you, hm? don’t you want to feel good too?”

his breath hitches. his eyebrows go up, a little cute, hopeless. a little fucker is what he is, oh you’d just kick him in the head now if it wasn’t about your payment.

“how about you lay on your back properly, and we finally get to that? let me take care of you.”

he’s so easy. he flips onto his back immediately, dear god he’s actually fucking hilarious, almost rolling off the bed in his hurry.

“y-yeah… okay.” he breathes, voice cracking with excitement. you’re seconds away from slapping your tummy laughing. “if… if you want to. you don’t have to—”

you push his head back down onto the pillow. smile charmingly at him. “shh. let me help you, boss.”

oh that name specifically gets him bucking his hips up once into the air.

you’re more than ready to move this along. “sit up for me maybe, that’ll feel better.” you murmur softly.

he whines, the pathetic asshole, scrambling up into a sitting position against the headboard, legs spread. this hoodie looks good on him with the sleeves pushed up. you just noticed.

you reach forward and hook your fingers into the waistband of his pants. the second you start tugging, jeongin lifts his hips, watching it with you how his cock springs free immediately, slapping up on his stomach. oh he’s that hard. basically ready to bust.

fuck, he’s prettily shaven too. just like hyunjin, smooth as a fucking pornstar. not a single hair around the base or on his balls. so he prepared for this too. it was worth it, he has a pretty dick. basically like chan’s just not as long(still more than enough to be impressive, especially on a guy like him, the airhead), beautiful and manly, makes you suddenly care about this whole thing a lot more. his balls are perfect too, like perfect, the little guys especially suit him, two nice, full, separate little balls underneath, which you can clearly see and appreciate individually. lucky boy.

you just can’t help the small huff that escapes you. it’s actually an amused sound, and you’re rarely amused. amused is a big word for you.

of course he’s pretty down here too.

just like hyunjin. pretty face, decent dick, and zero fucking brains between the ears. consistent, it is. the prettier they are, the dumber they get. it’s only natural, the universe giving with both hands is nearly impossible.

except when it comes to you. you’re perfect, of course. insert angel emoji that’s incredibly cringe to write down but fits here perfectly.

so basically him and hyunjin are the same. jeongin’s just the less intense and not that much of a brat version.

his cock twitches under your gaze, rock hard, he’s embarrassed by how obvious it is.

you reach out and wrap your hand around him gently, giving one slow stroke just for now.

he hisses through his teeth, thrusting up into your fist.

“mm, where did the condoms go?” you mumble sweetly, stroking him, looking around. you really mean it just playfully, you don’t actually plan on fucking hi—

the speed at which he moves actually embarasses hyunjin’s dancing skills. like he fucking lunges to the side, cock bouncing as he does, and snatches the condom packet from where he threw it earlier. wow, seems to know it perfectly where it was too. his hands are shaking so badly he almost drops it twice while trying to tear it open. instead rips it open with his teeth like an animal, so unsafe jeongin don’t do that ever again that’s irresponsible and dangerous to both parties, then quickly rolls it down his cock, so unbelievably clumsy.

even that looks hot on him.

when not fucking hilarious. he’s fucking hilarious.

the way his abdomen muscles flex when he sits up a little, the way his lower arm muscles tense as he smooths the condom down his pretty manly shaft, the way his pretty face is concentrated, twisting up as he bites on his lip while looking down, it’s so attractive. dumb boys with pretty bodies are like the top ten inventions on the world.

once the condom’s on, jeongin leans back against the headboard again, so beautiful chest rising and falling fast under that hoodie, the fact how built his chest is, how wide it seems under the clothes, is also attractive because it shows you he worked for that, fucking dumbass doing one smart thing at least, then looks at you with those big, desperate, boyish eyes.

his cock stands hard and wrapped, begging for your attention. soon, mini jeongin, soon. though the pretty balls under it makes you want to hurry up.

same guy you saw once only in his underwear. when you were with his roommate. who you also had some kind of sex with, also had naked like this, also had. but he was barefoot and jeongin still has his fuckass white socks on. whatever.

point is, now you want this too. not as desperately as he does, but sure, you’re down.

he whines softly, so beautiful, an angelic little sound even(hyunjin sounded even better), takes you off your feet almost, and reaches up with shaky fingers to tug gently at the collar of your shirt.

“please…” he whispers, cheeks so red. obviously hurt to say even out loud.

you tilt your head, looking at him. you’re so patient. so hot. “you want my tits?”

he nods. embarrassing and embarrassed.

you sigh softly, fondly, and start unbuttoning the top few buttons of your shirt. but leave it like that, you’re not in the mood to take anything more off. would be too intimate. so you instead reach in, pull the cups of your bra down, let your tits spill out over the top.

“oh… mhm…” he breathes, staring. he’s never seen anything so perfect in his life. (he has, it’s chan’s back, jeongin’s just too horny now)

you lean forward a little and gently caress the side of his neck with one hand, thumb stroking over his racing pulse.

his breathing stops.

“come here.” you whisper, straddling him, knees on either side of his hips. you reach down, wrap your fingers around his condom covered cock, and line him up with yourself.

you start sinking down. inch by inch. so slow. you could go fast but you’re in the mood now too, finally.

(acting like you weren’t also in the mood when you were grinding with chan and when, as painful it is to admit, when you were listening to that otherworldly asshole’s, hwang fucking hyunjin’s little moans while you sucked him off)

he feels good. you’re wet already anyway. condom has lube too, which you’re currently wiping off on his shoulder. jeongin doesn’t care, doesn’t notice, currently his head falls back on the wall, giving a little “aaahh…” to you, mouth open, eyes closing. his hands get on your waist, gripping, holding, wanting.

“fuck, you’re so tight.” he whines up into the air. thanks.

you let his brutally satisfying??? cock fill you up until your ass is on his smooth boy thighs. feels good, that he’s holding you up now, kind of. the knowledge that you’re sitting on him and you’re, kinda, safe. and oh yeah also that he’s buried to the hilt in you, stretching you nicely.

you let out a soft, pleased sigh, adjusting to the feeling of him, rocking a little, your body releasing dopamine now that your little cunt finally has something big in it.

for a bit you just sit there, full of him. jeongin turns his head back down to look at your taken out tits.

you start rocking first. nothing crazy, you’re good at what you do, good at sex anyway. his cock quite literally stirs in you. feels good.

movement makes your tits bounce gently. jeongin’s eyes follow them, he’s hypnotized, lips parted, soft little moans slipping out his pretty mouth.

“mhyeah, yeah, that’s good…” he mumbles.

“hm.” you answer to not leave him on seen irl and keep rocking, nice and slow, letting him get hornier, feel every inch of your warm, wet pussy sliding around his cock.

your hands decide to live on his shoulders, thumbs stroking his neck as you move. you’re sweet. good at this.

you let out these soft, sweet little sounds that make him a thousand times more into this, into the moment, and you start getting into it more. rising up a little higher before sinking back down, really riding him. smooth, sensual.

your tits bounce more noticeably, jiggling everytime you drop down on his cock. jeongin’s hands slide up from your waist/hips to cup your breasts, as much as it’s out at least, holding them, his assistant’s pretty boobs.

“oh my god, fuck, you feel so good.” he whimpers.

“thank you, innie. so do you.”

he moans. loud. his hips start thrusting up to meet yours, trying to fuck up into you. patience, maybe? no? okay.

you lean forward, pressing your tits closer to his face, and he take his chance, latches onto one nipple, sucking on it, moaning around it. it’s the best thing he’s ever tasted. both his hands keep squeezing, kneading, mammal, animal while you ride him a little faster, a little harder. wet sounds of your pussy sliding up and down his cock start to come out. rhythmic. you’re way better at this than he is.

his head keeps falling back, then snapping forward again so he can watch your tits bounce and suck on them again. his teeth hurt on you sometimes, whatever, working is hard, and that’s what you’re doing now. now you just… enjoy it enough to moan too. or maybe it’s also the discomfort that your clit would like some friction too, but him inside is good too. really good.

not as good as for him though.

“ahh, fuck— oh my god.” his voice is high. he can’t control it. you’re too good. you’re perfect.

you grab his pretty face with one hand, the other is still on that flawless shoulder you’d love sitting on, like nothing sexual genuinely just sitting, men with shoulders like these are made to carry girls on them, anyways, and squish his cheeks together.

his lips pucker out like a fish, still swollen, eyes going wide as you ride him slower to focus on your words.

“do you know when chan’s coming home?” you ask calmly, still bouncing on his cock, like it’s nothing, dude.

“dunno, he alweady migh be homemmph.”

“shut the fuck up then.”

jeongin’s eyes roll back and he moans even louder. dipshit. he likes that. the meanness. the way you’re using him and he’s also using you.

but he really can’t stay quiet. he’s getting so close already, pathetic boy. his balls are all up in him already, his abs are clenching, thighs shaking and flexing under you.

and exactly when he starts whimpering “i’m close— i’m so close—” you sit fully on his cock, grinding in slow circles now, and he whines pathetically under your hand still squishing his cheeks.

“n-nooo, please, ah wass so closs.”

you wait until his breathing evens out a little, then start moving slowly again, taking him fully again.

he moans loud and relieved, head falling back. so happy that you’re riding him again, faster this time, tits bouncing over your bra which he’s too close to cum to pay proper attention to. why are they out then?

him not appreciating you enough is your exact reason to edge him again when he looks like he’s close, so you lift yourself up until just the tip is inside you, holding still.

his hips try to chase you. “fuhh—ffuck, no, no no no— i was right there, i was right there.” he tries to thrust up but you squirm away, clicking your tongue. that’s so hot. “pleassah need— ah, need t’cum— so baaad, so fuckin’ badh—”

you look down at him, squishing his cheeks together more once or twice just to watch him look cute, and sink back down slowly.

he cries out, head rolling around as you’re bouncing fast, letting your tits jiggle right in front of his face that he now looks at sometimes. still not good enough.

you let go of his face. need both hands on his perfect shoulders. now you can listen to him tell you “ahhgonna— mmh, fuck, y/n— so good so gooood— please lemmelemme i need, ungh— cum— pleasepleaseplease—”

you stop. you sit still on his cock, clenching around him rhythmically while he thrashes around underneath you.

his eyes are wet, whole face red, beautiful. “mmh, y/n, gonna—gonna, fuck, mommy— nowaitshit— please, ahh, huuh, fuckme, please— unghhh—” he has his teary eyes rolled back, mouth open, drooling a little. he’s so close it hurts, y/n, please.

“shh. be quiet. chan might be home, remember?”

he nods. “mmh, sorry, please, let me— want, pleaseeeee—”

pathetic.

that’s what he gets. that’s what he deserves for being a selfish asshole, and also because he works so hard and so entitled. so he gets this both for the good and bad.

fuck, he heard that edging feels good or whatever but this is his first time experiencing it. it’s brutal. torture. unbearable. he’s so going to thank you later.

“you wanna cum, jeongin?” you ask sweetly.

“yes, yes please iiii wanna cum so bad.”

“you sure?”

“yes, yesyesyes— please let me, i’m so close, so good, i am, please—”

you keep rolling your hips. “you really do?”

“yes, yesh, please i’m so close it hurts please let me cum—”

“you really need to?”

he’s so turned on. “yes yes yes please please please please i’ll do anything—”

“you want to cum?”

“yes—”

“you want to cum?”

“yes please—”

“you want to cum, jeongin?”

“yesfuckyes, ahh— pleasepleaseplease—”

“really?”

“i can’t hold it y/n pleaseeee—”

his whole body is shaking, hips jerking up desperately, trying to fuck you harder but you keep control.

you finally sigh. don’t stop your pace now. “sure, go ahead, whatever.”

jeongin’s eyes roll back, like he loses control of them, and he lets out the loudest orgasm you’ve ever pulled out of a man.

his hips jerk up, uncontrollable, burying himself as deep as he can while he shakes and thrashes and cries out. high, pathetic, beautiful moans, screams, cries. pretty face twisted in pure bliss as he keeps shooting load after load.

his balls pulse under your ass with every shot he delivers into the condom. it’s adorable.

his whole body convulses underneath you, abs clenching, thighs shaking, ass flexing up, fingers digging painfully into your waist as he rides out the longest, hardest orgasm of his life.

you gave that to him. his assistant. helped him out with this too.

you keep riding him through it. his eyes are rolled back, mouth open, drooling, completely fucked stupid. it takes almost thirty seconds before his orgasm finally starts to fade.

you sit down on his cock for a few more seconds, letting him catch his breath, then slowly lift yourself off him. he slips out with a wet sound, condom very full.

you stand up, not even mad that you didn’t cum because you didn’t expect to, whatever you’ll rub one out at home, pull your bra back up, button your shirt, pull your pants and panties back on calmly. fix your clothes.

all while that dumb little babe is lying there completely fucked out. it looks good on him, that hoodie pushed up, pants around his thighs, cock softening in the condom, chest slowly moving now, eyes closed.

you pat his cheek. your first idea was to give him a forehead kiss but that would be unprofessional(that would be?). “you did well. get some rest, okay? drink some water.”

he nods weakly, mumbling something that sounds like “thank you” but slurred.

“and don’t think too hard about it.”

“got it.” he whispers.

you check your reflection real quick in the mirror (you look mostly normal), and leave his room. a boyish room. suits him. kinda messy but not the clothes on the floor way, just lotta clutter. nice, in general.

chan doesn’t seem to be home yet. you pause at the front door, listening, but there’s nothing.

eh. you’re too tired to go back into the studio to check on him now. whatevs.

you close the door softly behind you and head home.

men. always so horny. always so loud. always leaving you walking home at midnight. but hey, at least you’re good at your job.

the next morning, jeongin is sitting at the small kitchen counter at their dorm, staring intensely into his little protein cereal. chan walks into the kitchen, still just waking up, oh how cute boys are just living together, and jeongin looks somewhere else. the ceiling, the floor, his spoon, anywhere but chan’s face. his leg is bouncing.

chan, mostly half asleep and shirtless still, scratches his stomach and opens the fridge. “morning.”

“morning.” jeongin says way too nonchalant, eyes glued to his cereal.

chan grabs his own shit, whatever men like these eat that are either forced on them or they torture themselves with it willingly, and sits down across from jeongin.

jeongin doesn’t look up.

chan raises an eyebrow. chews on his little breakfast. hot. “you good?”

“yeah. super good. everything’s great.” he shovels cereal into his mouth so aggressively he almost chokes on it. oh but didn’t choke on pussy yesterday.

chan chews slowly, watching him. “…did you break something of mine?”

“no.”

“did you mess up something?”

“no.” jeongin stands up, grabs his bowl, basically runs to the sink. “i’m gonna go shower.” he announces to the fucking wall. he can’t look his hyung in the eye. not after he spent half the night with his cock buried inside the same girl chan had on him a few nights ago.

chan sits there, completely lost. “…okay?”

jeongin speedwalks to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

channie baby(hopeless man just too tired mentally to be anything and anywhere else) hears the shower turn on. hm. okay. he mutters to himself “what the fuck is wrong with him this morning…” chan is typically the type to mutter to himself out loud. chan is like those dads who swear on their lives they don’t care about the series going on in the tv but still stand with specifically both hands on his hips behind the couch, eyes glued to the screen. he’s also like the dads who are fucking asleep and the milisecond you reach for the remote, he wakes up and tells you he was watching that.

anyways. he has no idea what’s up with jeongin.

yeah no but just again, these men know each other. can read each other like the word apple. it doesn’t even take three hours for them to figure out that jeongin is not his usual self, and they care about each other, so they’ll want to know what’s in his mind.

and about especially the fucking way he’s on you all day. during practice he “accidentally” bumps into you and lets his hand live on your lower back while smiling and apologizing. bitch take it off. during their lunch he sits next to you, eating, talking to you with his mouth full, really on you and really noticing that you’re the same as you were until now, that you don’t act different. he doesn’t know what to think of that. doesn’t like it, there’s this heavy feeling in his stomach. yeah, he doesn’t like it.

so soon the second you’re away filling their water bottles or just getting new plastic ones, they fly on his ass.

so they’re alone. han kicks jeongin’s foot. “yo, what’s wrong with you? you got laid?”

jeongin’s face loses all color.

felix is grinning. “nah, look at him. he’s glowing, bro.” bro. average men conversation, bro.

seungmin watches jeongin, standing next to him. his eyes are that low lidded type, like he has a straight face. “what’s up?”

changbin leans forward. he’s so cute. “what happened?”

“c’mon.” minho tells him.

hyunjin comes into jeongin’s face a little. “y/n?”

silence.

jeongin is fidgeting with his two hands. laughing. then not. trying to play it cool but failing miserably. “…yeah. we had sex.”

silence.

“she went down on you too??”

“oh— no, like, she rode me.”

…

..?

???

han screams “WHAT?! you?!”

felix turns away, throwing his arms up. “this is bullshit.”

hyunjin’s pretty face twists. “what?” now imagine that in the little beautiful voice of his.

changbin is covering his mouth. chan’s heart physically stops beating. minho’s eyes get BIG.

seungmin is impressed. smiling so wide. “how was it?”

oh jeongin gets brutally embarrassed that he has to say it out loud. like, he wants to, it’s just hard. what happened to allat he’s finally as good as his hyungs mindset? “it was… really good. she was really nice. uh… ate her out. uh, dude, i don’t know, it just happened.”

“how’d she taste?” “did you last longer than two minutes?” “did she moan?” “was she tight? tell me she was tight.” “you lucky little shit, i’ve been trying to get her alone for days—”

“i saw her tits and everything. they’re great.”

han actually falls on his knees.

they’re teasing. being boys. getting more information out of him as we’re speaking, he tells them the whole story. but they’re mad. like wdym jeongin got full sex? wdym you told chan no but let the little maknae dick you down? okay dick you down and you riding him until he was screaming are two different things, but he’s honest about what happened and the others fuck with it. anyways, wdym hyunjin got left with blue balls but jeongin had real sex? hyunjin wants real sex too. so mostly him and chan are the ones actually mad. the others are just jealous but whatever they’re friends and they love innie, no hard feelings. none of them.

and back then, some judged you for even just spending the night with chan. now, surprisingly, there’s none of that. a normal person would assume you’re an actual whore, but since they really want your services, they basically see the world though pink tinted glasses.

can’t be mad at you. you’re so sweet, so helpful, so innocent, so hot. y/n always helps them out. that’s just how the world goes, this was supposed to happen with innie. maybe is it supposed to happen with them too? they hope so.

later that afternoon, when everyone else is distracted with fuckwhat, chan pulls you into one of a smaller rooms, closes the door.

he’s trying to be calm, but it’s not working. “you slept with jeongin?”

“yes.”

he exhales through his nose, looking away, such a man, having his hands on his slutty hips. “why?”

you lean against a table. professional. mature. way more put together than he is right now. “because i wanted to, chan. it’s that simple. he asked. i said yes. same as when you asked. same as when hyunjin asked. it’s just helping, you know that. releasing stress. you all carry so much. i don’t mind being the relief when you need it.”

he’s… insecure? “but why him? after you told me no the other night. after you stopped us. you let him fuck you but you wouldn’t let me?”

oh. so that’s what this is abouuuut.

“what happened with him wasn’t special in that way. he heard us one night through the wall, exactly the night i stopped us. it was different with you, that was a different situation. you two are two different maturities. i thought you knew that too.” i thought you knew that too. why are you lowkey a good manipulator? “i like taking care of you specifically, if that’s what you’re overthinking about. but i’m not picking favorites. it just came like this. this isn’t driven by emotion, but the night i stopped us was. we both could tell, yeah?”

“…yeah.”

“yeah.”

why are you having the upper hand here???

he swallows, looking away. he looks gross. vulnerable needy little bitch. “so you don’t… feel anything when you’re with them?”

“not in the way you’re thinking.” you say softly. it matters how you talk to him now.

he’s quiet for a long time, processing. you’re so calm. so mature. so in control. it’s hot. it turns him on. finally he lets out a long breath and nods. “okay. yeah, you’re right. you’re right.”

you smile and pat his chest. “good. anything else?” oh that has a double meaning and both of you know it.

he watches you with big eyes. “…no.”

dumbass.

yeah. so that went down too. that helped you with seeing them more clearly now.

the more they get comfortable around you, the more they show what they can’t show the cameras. it’s hot, the tension, the secret, but now you see how they are, how they think. how much of the opposites they are from what they give out to the world. weird, confusing, toxic, selfish, traumatized, sexist.

hyunjin is one of the worst. he’s nasty. a bad man. he once told you women are naturally better at taking care of people, which sounds like a nice sentence at first especially said to a woman, but he means it in a way where your entire worth is tied to how useful and soft and fuckable you are. he expects you to drop everything when he calls your name. when you don’t jump fast enough he gets pissy. you’re a hole with nice hands to him. nothing more.

just again, him and jeongin are really similar. jeongin right now feels like getting his dick wet makes him manlier than his hyungs. he just basks in the ego high of i fucked her too.

felix is… you don’t see the side of felix where he’s sexist and kinda unintentionally mean. he doesn’t show you that. he’ll say shit like you’re so good at handling us but the subtext is always you’re so good at serving men. so there’s only under the surface things that you could notice. he doesn’t see you as a full person, he sees a walking collection of holes that happens to be nice to him and gives them what he asks for.

and han gets grabby and pushy when he’s horny. doesn’t really take in mind the fact that you have a personal space too and that you’re not just a worker for him. he’ll sling his arm around you, pull you to his lap without asking, basically is all on you. lucky that you like it, because he doesn’t care if you’re uncomfortable. he wants what he wants. c’mon just the tip final boss. a creep.

changbin is less aggressive than the others but just as selfish. he wants comfort. he wants to be taken care of. he wants your body, he wants a woman. now.

seungmin fully expects you to spread your legs when he decides it’s time. because to him you’re just useful. that’s what you are, a nice girl who can be used for his selfish dick.

minho… would see you as a woman if he cared about your personality, if maybe he got to know you as a person before a worker, if he was your friend, but he’s not. now he’s just an older guy who wants what’s between his assistant’s legs.

chan wants to be special, that’s what his fault is. he’s insecure, needy, sexist, and has a million other things to pay attention to, to top all this off. he’s unbelievably stressed. this is not good for him, but well… better as if there was no relief(the one you give) at all.

they’re all disgusting, pure lustbrained creeps who see you for your body, your services only. they don’t care about your feelings, they don’t ask if your jaw hurts after sucking them off, they don’t care if you’re tired or sore or tired from managing eight massive egos. they just want, want, want. more head. more pussy. more tits in their face. more of you dropping everything to service them.

they’re bitches too. under the idol image, they’re all entitled passive aggressive little shits. they complain about schedules, about each other, about management, about everything, but never about themselves. never about how they treat you.

you watch them live, just learn them when they’re busy. the way they bark your name when they want something. the way they expect you to laugh at their bad man jokes. the way they stare at your body. the casual sexism that slips out in “harmless” comments about women in the industry, about how “emotional” girls get, about how lucky they are to have a “chill” assistant like you.

it disgusts you.

you’re fascinated by it.

how quickly the fake act falls once they’ve had their dick in you. how fast thank you y/n turns into get on your knees y/n, how they go from sweer idols to horny, selfish boys the second they don’t have to act, to look good.

you like them for it, after all.

they’ve been told their whole lives that they’re special, that women exist to serve in some capacity, and now they got you dropped down at their bigass feet, competent, sweet, sexually available, confirming every disgusting fantasy they’ve ever had.

just again, felix and his fantasies. he’ll say something normal, seems like just a nice, an okay guy, all while he’s imagining you in some position he saw in a hentai at 4am. he wants to finally put it in something warm and living and woman and something that will make him cum. he wants you to call him daddy. to suck his cock while he plays his fucking games. he just wants and doesn’t want to give.

jeongin is just dumb. plain dumb. pretty face, nice dick, zero thoughts. he thinks getting to fuck you makes him cool, he tells the others about it left and right, he thinks he accomplished something instead of just being lucky.

hyunjin is mean. he wants to hurt you a little. he gets off on the power imbalance, that you are so much smaller than him, that he could fire you anytime. wouldn’t, though.

seungmin watches you always, when your back is to him. he just wants to fuck. like purely just wants some. he’s just… not entitled enough to do something about it. but he wants to. doesn’t know what to, though. and you’ve already had lots of the others, won’t he look pathetic? ugh, he can’t stand the thought of that. can only hope you see him attractive enough. wants you to. wants to play with you. make you like his voice, his body, his dick. personality is not important. who cares when you’re nothing more than a pair of tits and skill.

changbin feels like shit. already felt like fucking shit in general, then you came along, gave him hope, sucked hyunjin off. he’s not angry at you, of course, he’s not that dumb(so like if this situation was with seungmin and felix, if felix was in changbin’s potion then he’d be so angry at you too. but he’s not in changbin’s position, so) but he really wants some too, c’mon, everyone knows that. hyunjin especially!! so he’s a little angry at hyune now. that combined with living like this, the all time pressure, wanting to fuck bad and knowing who you want to fuck, makes him unreasonable too. he does crazy, dumb shit too. but that mostly comes out between him and the boys, so you don’t get much of that.

minho wants to dick you down but not urgent enough yet to ask. maybe in a scenario where he’ll get real needy but why would you be there, that usually happens when he’s at home. he thinks jisung will eventually start taking you home too, maybe then he’ll start opening towards you more. he already opens towards you lots, take him sitting with you and talking to you, simple staff btw that’s what you are, he’s just that attracted to you.

han just wants some attention too. he gets plenty of it already, but he wants your sexual attention specifically. your eyes on him, preferably in a scenario where he’s shirtless and you’re admiring him. he likes that little scenario lots. when daydreaming, his thoughts always come back to that. it’s his favorite. but… he’s not smart. we know that. so his kindness towards you comes from his want, not his pure heart. because he doesn’t value you. he just wants to fuck.

and we already know, chan wants to be your favorite, doesn’t matter if he likes that fact or not. he wants(craves, needs) emotional intimacy mixed with filthy sex and he doesn’t like that you won’t give him both.

or maybe he has to ask for that too? your job is to do things for them. ugh, no, not that easy. nevermind.

you see how they compete now. how they stare at you, follow you with their eyes. how they touch you more, really shooting their shots with the charm they learned over the years. they’re disgusting.

oh you don’t ignore any of this. you keep in mind every disgusting, selfish, sexist, lustful part of them that they have shown you so far. but you don’t care. you’re okay with them this way, this is just sex. work.

and they use that you let them act like this and accept them that way, since you enable their behavior, you let it slide. why wouldn’t you, you get paid for it.

yeah it’s a mutual understanding. during one long waiting period, you’re sitting on a couch with minho. you two are quiet, have been the whole time, you’re leaning forward to look through some papers on the table in front of you two, someone is talking to you, it’s all so crowded, fast, you feel his hand slide down your back… then lower… then he gropes your ass. like a confident squeeze. something a boyfriend would do.

you turn around immediately and he’s already looking at his phone, blank face, both hands on the phone. “sorry did you—“

“hm?” he asks. looks up at you with those big shining eyes, acting like he doesn’t know what you’re about to ask, like he’s just here and you mixed him up with someone. works well.

you stare at him. he stares back. you both know he’s lying. you both know he doesn’t care.

you sigh. look back to your business. the shit you let them get away with.

he bites his lip not to smile.

also, seungmin and felix living together means that they move such on the same frequency. they get each other so well, click immediately when they want to do something or the other does.

this was the explanation for how one afternoon, near at one of the closets you walk into to get something, they follow you. like not sneaky following, they’ve been having a conversation with you for about fifteen minutes now, so naturally they went with you, weren’t needed for work anyway.

now you’re completely talking to them, just holding whatever you came for. seungmin is in front of you, humming back to you, while felix is behind you pretending to reach for something on the shelf. dumb thing because what could possibly the princess need from there.

you feel fingers at your bra clasp, fumbling, clearly not experienced.

felix is trying to undo it one handed while seungmin distracts you with boring small talk about han.

they’re fucking hilarious, actually.

also can’t do it for shit.

you act like you don’t notice. the clasp doesn’t budge. lix gets frustrated, tugs harder, loses balance, grabs seungmin and yanks him to hold himself up. seungmin falls into felix. both of them fuck around, nearly knocking you over.

you close your eyes. smile. giggle. hear a loud “fuck—” from felix and a “yah—” from seungmin as they tangle into each other.

you turn around slowly.

felix is red. seungmin is pretending he wasn’t involved.

“you two good?”

“yeah.” they say at the same time.

felix mutters something about “the shelf was crooked” and stands up properly, fixes his clothes, hair. seungmin does about the same.

what does this result in? getting their egos hurt when they think they weren’t hot enough for you, didn’t impress you enough. that also can result from when they see one of the others impress you more(well, you’re not really impressed, but they think the other impressed you more because they thought the other did better than them).

hyunjin is big on that too. you make the mistake of smiling at changbin during lunch(because he said something genuinely nice, at least he can). hyunjin sees it from across the room and actually stomps. like actually fucking stomps his foot then barks “y/n. come here.” across the room

you get up, walk over.

he grabs your wrist and leans in. there was zero need for allat for what he’s about to ask for, but he’s beautiful doing it so it’s forgiven. “i want coffee. iced. two shots. oat milk. extra ice. and make sure it’s not watered down like last time.”

he doesn’t need coffee. he just saw you give changbin attention.

you nod sweetly(important that you’re sweet) and go get it.

when you hand it to him he takes it without a word, frowns down at it, then turns away with it. not one thank you said.

the others are just as childish. whores. literally, han hugs you from behind to hang on you. he’s fucking brutal like literally loosens his knees and hangs from you. “sorry y/n, i’m just so tired~” yeah suuuuure buddy.

remember how jeongin slapped your arm sweetly back when you were working with chan and he came out in underwear only? wait you know what he’s packing in those now. anyways. he’s doing those slaps now too, just to touch you, and they somehow always end up brushing the side of your tit. or “y/n i’m so sore from practice, can you massage my shoulders?”

and felix really only does this when no other staff is around, he doesn’t want a rumor to start now does he, but once or twice(exactly seven times) it already happened that he got behind you and rested his chin on your shoulder. breathing on your neck just because he knows women like that, if he’s tired too then one hand on your waist while he asks you about what you’re currently doing. transferring seungmin’s money, felix, transferring seungmin’s money. he asks you to do something similiar for him too later then leaves. he doesn’t want to. he likes your touch(to a level where liking your touch is more romantic than just lust) but he has shit to do and so do you. oh but when he’s free and you’re still busy then suddenly it’s not a problem—

once, once, minho put his hand on your thigh when you two were sitting next to chan in the rolling chairs while listening to han sing something out. chan didn’t notice, it’s not even about that, only you did. and him.

sometimes when you turn your head while on your laptop at one of the couches, seungmin is just staring into your soul. just looks at you, heavy eye contact when you look up. …hello?? he waves. oh okay hi.

and to top that off changbin has the audacity to come with “y/n… can you stay with me for a bit?” while you have a hundred other things to do and three of them is bringing important stuff to chan and exactly one is getting hyunjin matcha.

and chan wants to know that you still like him best. the fuck he so big for(wideness, not height) if he’s this small mentally.

you and him are sitting next to each other talking bout sum shit, well you’re talking, because he’s looking at you with the wettest most fuckable pathetic little kicked over no makeup eyes that his body is capable of. and he doesn’t mean to. he just gets so lost in his assistant that he lets you talk for minutes then has zero clue what you just said when you ask back. you hate that. like really actually do this is for real, go to work, chan.

they’re menchildren. spoiled. disgusting. needy. insecure. pretty. stupid. horny. evil. bitches.

yesterday for an example, you feel lix’s breath on your neck while he “helps” you carry something(not like anyone asked him to). and he doesn’t think that’s wrong. okay yeah, he feels it but only in the professional way, that the only wrongness about this is about his career. notice yourself, you fucking creep.

yes they’re this horrible. genuinely psychologically fucked up like how most famous people usually are.

age order now again, chan is deeply insecure and controlling. he needs to feel like he’s your main pick, like he’s special, like he’s the only one who really gets you(??? he’s weird). just because he was your first.

everytime you give attention to someone else it chips at his ego and he gets even sadder. and this man is already sad enough for most days, his life is living hell. typa guy who would cry after sex or get mad at you for not cuddling him long enough. leader complex, workaholic, abandonment issues, brutal wounds from his past. just great. oh you don’t wish a relationship with him on your worst enemy(sweet summer child y/n only if you knew how this fic will end…)

minho is blunt and dehumanizing on purpose. he sees you as a tool that happens to have a nice pussy. he’s a nice guy, sure whatever, is good for male friendship. would also be great for a romantic relationship with a woman but he doesn’t want any of that right now, right now his main focus “romantically” is you and your body.

changbin wants love and care from you while giving nothing back. selfish. so so so selfish but he’s also a really easy man. means you could have the upper hand here if you wanted it, but you don’t. you don’t fucking care as long as you get paid and get to have sex.

hyunjin has no empathy, that’s what his problem is besides being an average man, which means there’s evil in his heart. he gets off on power and degradation. he wants to hurt your feelings a little, wants to make you feel small so he feels bigger. classic narcissist with a god complex.

han is aggressive. he uses “playfulness” as an excuse to grope and grind and push. he’s emotionally immature as fuck. he thinks being loud and energetic towards you makes him charming when really he’s just exhausting. you liked him better when he wasn’t interested in you, when he was more real, when you saw him stare at his phone and look unflattering. then, you were even a little attracted. you like it when men are real. now you know what he wants.

felix is just an… average degrading porn watcher. yeah we’re really dragging it back to porn here so let’s ignore how significant it is to the way he acts, he’s dumb to start off with. this can be told by anything, really. a man that dumb could see women in a nice light, he does too, just not enough to respect an assistant who gives her body out.

seungmin is fine with staring at your ass, for now. he only understands people he loves, people he wants to understand. he can only feel empathy for them. so there is no reason for him to care about someone such low as you are, since you’re just staff. that’s all you are.

jeongin is just dumb. painfully dumb. classic pretty but empty. zero emotional intelligence. getting his dick wet makes him feel like a man. and he doesn’t understand boundaries. he just wants more, more, more, he cannot get enough of you, the idea of you.

they’re all menchildren. bitches. on you. constantly. they want attention. they want your hands giving care to them(your job btw). they want your mouth(not your job). they want your pussy, they want you to look at them with love and acceptance while they treat you like an object, they want you to be at their feet the second they snap their fingers.

jeongin is, obviously, like the worst now. ever since you fucked him he’s been glued to you. clingy. he’s too inexperienced with relationships that have worklife in them at some point, too dumb, too attached. he’s waiting for you to drag him into the nearest room again and doesn’t get it when it doesn’t happen. like… he hopes you want him. oh, you must, he ate you out so good. made you cum like, what, three times?(not even once) but oh what if you don’t like him..? oh no…

he’s is still in the honeymoon phase of i had sex with someone new, and it shows. he obviously feels a lot even though it was made clear that no feelings involved. he’s just not built for that and went into it too easily because he was horny at the moment. now look where that got him, he stares at you during the day, when you’re talking to chan about something, when you’re bringing the others things, when you help at practices, the others have to scream at him to pay attention. you give zero reactions to those, you, the fucking assistant is more professional than him.

the others are pissed. jealous. but can you blame him. blame them. they’re traumatized. fucked up. probably not fixable at all. years of torture, brutal training, sleep deprivation, constant criticism, their worth supposedly only as good as their last comeback, having their bodies and faces and voices taken as products which all need to be perfect. no fucking human is perfect. and they all push through pain, through illness, through burnout because stopping means disappointing millions and losing everything they’ve sacrificed for. it’s brutal.

they’ve been conditioned since they were teenagers to ignore their own bodies, their own minds, their own needs. like feelings are totally weakness(plus they’re men, feelings are much harder to express for men). vulnerability is girly. rest is laziness.

and you get it, you get why they need you now, why they all jumped at the chance of you.

they get prettier and emptier. praised and worshipped but never truly known. surrounded by people but deeply lonely.

you understand why they’re like this. you don’t want anything from them except their cum and their temporary peace. they want that.

deep down, even if they’re not conscious of it, appreciate it. your actions, selflessness and care means so much to them, they just don’t know it, could barely tell even if someone pointed it out for them.

so yea you’re still down to fuck, you don’t care how fucked up they are because you’re not gonna date them(again, only if you knew what awaits you at the end of the series) sometimes letting them use your body is the kindest thing you can do for them.

and oh bin has been having enough of hyunjin lately. he loves him so much, they’re literally each other’s top people, but no doubt that they get irritated at each other. these are usually little phases. now there’s a hyunjin irritates changbin phase. it’ll pass, whatever, they all do, but it’s still ongoing now. so when you overhear hyunjin telling someone during lunch that he’s sleeping over at his parents’ house tonight, you already know what’s coming.

and what’s coming? changbin finding you in a hallways while everyone’s packing up.

“y/n, hey, uh, are you free tonight? my dorm. hyunjin’s gone for the night, i know you two… yeah. i… i could really use some company. if you want.”

you understand perfectly. he’s asking for the same thing the others have been chasing, relief.

“yeah, i’ll come over.” knowing he wants to bury his face between your legs or cry in your arms or both.

because at the end of the day, these are just men. disgusting, traumatized, horny men who never had the chance to learn how to ask for help the healthy way.

men are already shit at that, now combine that with the way these live. so they ask with their bodies. with their dicks. with their neediness and their selfishness and their ugly little egos.

you let them. someone has to. you can handle it. you’re fine with it. you’re always fine with it.

so hours later, you end up at his and hyunjin’s dorm again. oh how much better the atmosphere is when hyunjin is not here! (he’s actually a pleasant company if you two are friends. but you two are not)

changbin holds the door open for you like a proper gentleman, okay wow thanks, stepping back with a small, shy smile. looks good on him. or more likely, knows how to use it.

“come in… thank you for coming. really.” oh he’s so much better than hyunjin was. “do you want water? or tea? i can make coffee if you want something warm. or… there’s juice? or snacks? i bought some fruit earlier—”

“i’m okay, really. thank you though.” you shake your head with a pretty smile.

he hovers as you walk further inside. though he knows it’s not your first time here. fuck. but the dorm is neat, much neater than chan and jeongin’s place.

changbin waits until you sit down on the couch first, then sits next to you, leaving a respectful gap between your bodies. his hands in his lap, fingers playing with themselves. he’s visibly nervous. first time having a hooker over or whatever.

he clears his throat. “so… how was your day? i know it was long. you were running around a lot again. i saw you.”

you lean back a little, getting comfy, crossing your legs. “it was fine. same as usual. how about you? you seemed tired during practice.”

“yeah… it’s been like that lately. y’know, we have lots of things to do.” you do know, you do some of them for them.

“yeah. you’re doing great though.”

he chuckles, looks away, rubbing his thigh.

“tell me what’s been going on with you.”

he exhales. poor boy. “it’s just… everything. and the others get in these moods where nothing i do is right, and then at night i can’t sleep because… my brain won’t turn off. it’s all just a lot now.” he’s trying his best, communicating. men aren’t good at that, expressing their feelings, we know that.

“i have no idea how tiring it could be to be you. i just run around, that’s what i can tell you about, but for you… it’s unbelievable to me.”

“oh, no, heh, you’re—“

“you’re so good at what you do, boss.”

he looks at you. his mouth is open.

oh that boss was so perfect right now.

suddenly your knees are touching. then your thighs. his hand is on your waist. you turn toward him and he meets you halfway.

the kiss is very… adult. deep, hungry. he kisses good. and—oh he’s already using tongue. now that’s what you like. no fucking around, and he’s confident now(must have remembered how amazing he is again, your words helped him too), one hand cupping the back of your neck while the other pulls you closer.

his heartubeatuh, horribly overused and unfunny joke but couldn’t miss it, is so fast, so fast that he notices it. but his main focus is on your mouth, on you. he gives a relieved sound when you kiss him back just as eagerly, sounds so good. you two match so well.

he pulls back. well, that was quick. oh wait no he has something to say. “you’re… really good at that.” he whispers.

you smile, biting your bottom lip on purpose. “so are you.”

“uh, listen, i don’t want you to feel like you have to. if you don’t want this, we can just talk. or watch something. i don’t want to be like the others who—”

“i want to.” you squeeze his knee. he feels it. “i’m here because i want to be. because i like helping you feel good. because i like you, changbin.”

“oh—okay then. thanks.”

the kiss picks up where it left off. this is different from the others, with chan it was heavy and emotional, for him. with hyunjin it was pure human nature. with jeongin it was clumsy and so horny and just wanting to stick it somewhere already. with changbin… it’s actually pleasant. sweet, for your soul too for once, not just theirs.

you kiss him harder, sucking on his tongue, and he whimpers, let’s fucking go. you’re more confident now, that can be told easily by anyone who knows you. but luckily, these men don’t know you. can’t tell that you know they all want you. you know you can have any of them you want, whenever you want. that you might even be an… addiction? in development? well it wouldn’t get nice for their mental health to get addicted to something now, but what can you do about it? nothing.

you lean away, he thinks you’re just getting air, but then you start kissing down his neck. oh his dear god yes please. open mouthed, wet and hot kisses at first that makes him let out a loud exhale, head tilting to the side in pleasure, not even consciously.

the second your teeth graze his neck, when you start lightly nibbling on him, he gets goosebumps so visible, running down his arms. he shivers, arches, gets so hard in his pants.

“ah, fuck…”

you take his encouragement and do it again, nibbling on his neck, then going up and sucking gently under his ear.

his skin is so sensitive, so reactive. every little bite makes him twitch and whimper and smile and squirm around. the thought of rubbing your hip(that he’s still holding onto) crosses his mind, but then your tongue on his neck makes him moan and the thought of doing something for you too passes quickly.

he’s relieved someone is finally taking care of him for once. he’s so selfish. he’s under so much pressure. he deserves this. he deserves to be selfish. to have a pretty girl kissing his neck, and lower, soon.

you slide your hand down between your bodies and start rubbing him over his jeans. that’s what we meant by lower, soon. because he deserves this too.

he’s so hard. feels nice. you rub on him slowly, and binnie’s head falls back on the couch with a loud moan, hips pushing up into your hand.

he’s so responsive. every little squeeze or grope or stroke makes him turns his head around, eyes closed, blissed the fuck out. every time your teeth graze his skin he moans. he’s so hard it has to hurt.

you nibble on his neck, finding a what looks like a pretty sensitive spot.

“please don’t stop.” he breathes. “i… i really need you tonight…”

“i’ve got you. just relax.” and he does. he melts under your hands, moaning softly. “can i take your pants off, changbin?”

he nods so fast. “yeah, please, you can take everything off if you want.”

he looks down at you undoing his belt with huge eyes, you’re doing better with this belt than you were with hyunjin’s, it’s away in a second. button, zipper next. his cock basically calling your name.

he lifts his hips when you get to actually pulling things down. when you start tugging the jeans down only, he grabs his boxers himself and pushes down those too. oh, look at that, a cock. hello. his hands are shaking a little as he pushes them down his thick thighs.

hm. shaved for you. he looks nice. exactly what you’d expect from a short buff asian man. so a fat dick, basically. maybe around five inches, and holy the girth.

you wrap your hand around it. mhm, yeah, approved. his balls hang nicely too. a great package in general, looks like it would stretch you open so fucking good.

you hum softly in approval(that hits his heart so good). start stroking him as much as you can with no anything lubricanting involved.

changbin’s head falls back on the couch again with a moan, mouth open, eyes closing. “ahh, fuck… your hand feels so good.”

he’s so unbelievably sensitive. you like that.

you let a little spit drip on him to work better, now your hand slides on, with the foreskin and not afraid anymore to yank it too hard(you’re always scared of hurting dicks accidentally like this, they look so fragile:( ), now every stroke makes his cock twitch. feels good, how hard the cute little thing is. men just having things hanging between their legs is so cute.

when you twist your wrist at the head he whimpers, hips jerking up into your hand, head falling forward. some pre leaks from the slit that you can work with, it’s nicer to pull the skin up and down and around with that. you spread the pre around with your fingers, rubbing slow circles over the so so so sensitive head.

“y/n— shit, you’re so good at this…” and he’s heard about it too and still didn’t expect you to be this good.

you two actually look so cute from the outside if we ignore how erotic it is. you stroking him, sitting next to him, looking down at his fat cock disappearing into your fist over and over. cuties. plus, you’re unbelievably good at this and you know it. you squeeze perfect on the upstroke, thumb pressing under the head on every pass, occasionally spitting into your hand to make it even wetter. now it starts to give sounds too. it’s blessing your ears.

so far, great sexual experience. you’re gonna start grading these guys. he’s doing best so far from them, kinda.

it’s even cuter from the outside pov that he’s absolutely losing his mind beside you. his head keeps falling back, then snapping forward again so he can watch your hand working him, then to the side to bear with the pleasure and the emotions that come from finally getting this by someone else. his mouth stays open, moans, whimpers, stomach flexing all the time, whole body of his so honestly reacting to what you’re doing for him.

you lean down and give the head a slow little lick, then another but now swirl your tongue around the fat tip, as long as you don’t pull it back into your mouth you won’t feel the taste so it’s fine.

changbin lets out a loud whine. yeah that’s it for not taking your tongue back into your mouth because now you want it too, so to start off with you take just the head into your mouth, sucking gently while your hand keeps stroking the (thick) shaft. your jaw stretches. so does your back, having to sit next to him(you scooted over a bit) and leaning down to suck him off. you bob your head slowly, taking a little more each time, while your hand works the rest of him.

changbin puts his hands into your hair, gathers all of it, then holds it up in a pony with one hand, the other going down to your back. no particular reason, that’s just where humans would usually put their hand.

you pull off with a pop, fuck it sounds so hot it makes his tummy flip, strings of spit connecting your lips to his cock, and look up at him while you stroke him fast. “you’re so thick.” you murmur. “feels so good in my hand.”

he brings up the hand on your back to cover his lower face with, lower arm over his chin. part insecure about it, part just normally being affected by your words. “don’t say that i’ll cum too fast…”

you smile and lean back down, taking him deeper into your mouth, relaxing your throat so you can take more of him.

then you continue to suck him, bobbing your head, letting spit run down his shaft while only your fingers are around his base now. his moans pick up but louder.

it’s too easy. he’s so reactive, so sensitive, making him feel good is the easiest so far. an assistant’s job is to help, right? and right now changbin really, really needs help.

he’s also a natural in holding your hair back, so good at it, not pulling, not pushing your head down, just holding your hair in a loose little ponytail so it doesn’t get in the way. his grip moves with your head, picked the rhythm up you’re stroking him with.

oh he’s the male ever. but also, you struggle. your jaw starts to hurt after just a few minutes of sucking something this thick. the muscles burn, your lips feel stretched and sore and big, and everytime you take him deeper(which he always rewards with a little whine) you gag. your nose runs a little. your eyes water.

you have to pull back sometimes just to breathe, gasping, strings of spit connecting your swollen lips to his glistening cock while you stroke him with a slick hand. at least the smell of dick is not that strong in this position. well, you gladly deal with any men’s cock and balls smell if he’s hot enough, and changbin is hot enough, but still your nose having fresh air in it makes this a much better experience.

he doesn’t mind you stopping, if anything that’s what makes this perfect. helps him last longer too. always gives him a little time to breathe and turn his head around.

and he feels wanted. he feels desired. he feels like a man. he can barely think. could not care less about you stopping a few times because you need it.

he doesn’t taste particularly good. your throat constricts, trying to keep out whatever the fuck you’re shoving down on it now. you gag, an ugly gluck, spit runs down his shaft and over his pretty balls. his eyes roll back at the sound of that. your jaw hurts. your neck is starting to hurt from the angle. your eyes are watering so badly tears run down your cheeks.

but you push through, relaxing your throat as best you can, crossing your toes and whatever else tips you’ve heard for killing a gag reflex, taking him until your nose presses to his skin. there we go.

you gag. pull back, swallow around him. his whole body moves, arches, reacts above you. you circle your tongue around the fat head. he whimpers. you stroke the thick base with your slick hand while sucking the head. he throws his head back and humps his hips up.

you pull off for a bit to breathe, gasping, panting, coughing and every other colleague, strings of spit and precum connecting your chin to his cock.

you look up at him, your pretty eyes wet and red and tears running down from them, lips big, shiny, while your hand keeps stroking him.

it’s intimate, how he stares down at you.

the eye contact, in general.

his pretty face is red in the cheeks, lips parted, eyes half lidded(hottest thing a man can do with his eyes) as he stares down at you. his luring chest is moving fast, nipples hard and poking his shirt.

“you’re… you’re incredible.” he whispers. that was the only word he could find in this state really, and he’s right, you’re no less than incredible.

“thank you.” you take him back into your mouth, sucking harder this start.

your jaw is really starting to ache now, your throat hurts, but you keep bobbing your head, stroking the base or massaging his balls(oh that’s new, he closes one eye at that, grimaces in pleasure, and his eyes roll back).

his hand in your hair pulls, not even conscious that he’s doing it, holding your head in place as his hips start fucking into your mouth. not like, fucking, just tiny little pumps. because he’s so close.

and you’re going to let him cum. because that’s what good assistants do. they help. assist.

yeah he didn’t last long. you didn’t expect him to, though. his moans turn louder, higher, sweeter. “y/n, ahh— i’m— i’m gonna— fuck—”

changbin’s whole perfect body locks up, back arching off the fucking couch as he cries out the longest moan he has probably ever made. his eyes are closed in focus on his body, brows furrowed, his hips jerking up in tiny little thrusts as ropes of cum shoot on your tongue.

the taste is bearable. not as bad as chan’s or hyunjin’s was, you managed to swallow their loads too, but changbin’s is easier. you don’t have to gag it up here or hold anything back, it’s a little bitter but you can swallow it while still sucking on now just the head.

he keeps moaning through it. it’s so cute. his balls pulse visibly in your hand, contracting with each shot, emptying everything he’s been holding in for god knows how long.

when it ends he slumps back on the couch. chest moving fast, eyes closed(means he trusts you), lips open, trying to catch his breath, to adjust to the brutal orgasm he had.

you pull off slowly, swallowing what’s left in your mouth, gently stroke him through the aftershocks until he whines softly from the overstimulation, his hips squirming around.

then you stop, sit up straight, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, looking at his pretty face.

he opens his eyes. looks in front of himself. breathes. looks back at you with big eyes. dazed. “thank you. seriously. i don’t even know what to say.”

you lean in and kiss his cheek softly. even that’s professional from you and he can feel it, holy shit. “mm, you’re welcome.”

how that little kiss makes his heart react.

he laughs a little, shy, embarrassed, rubbing his face with both hands. “i lasted like… two minutes. i’m so sorry.”

“don’t be. i didn’t expect you to. you’ve been really stressed.”

and see how much nicer it is to talk to him? the others should sit down with notebooks and start writing.

“you’re really good at this. really. thank you.”

you chuckle(it’s a good technique, giving him only that) and stand up, stretching your legs. your jaw aches. your throat hurts like he poured boiling water down on it. okay that’s maybe an exaggeration, but anyways, for some reason you feel satisfied. just like when you were with chan for the first time. the second time with him, hyunjin an jeongin, weren’t satisfying at all. hyunjin was hot but didn’t make you feel fulfilled, only grew your ego. jeongin? pffftt don’t even start.

“thanks. i’m gonna go drink some water real quick, okay? stay here.” you ask in such a pretty voice.

“yeah, of course. take your time.”

you go to the kitchen, get yourself a glass of just lukewarm water, sip it slowly, staring at the fridge.

this was much better than the other experiences you had so far. less… chaotic. he’s genuinely sweet, even if he’s still a selfish man underneath it all. they all are. they take and take and take, but at least changbin was a pleasant experience. he’s naturally like that, maybe, but he would still deserve this release if he wasn’t.

when you come back to the living room, he has pulled his boxers an jeans back up(didn’t bother with the belt but has his jeans buttoned) he hesitates, then asks shyly “um… can i… do something for you too? i really want to make you feel good. if you’ll let me. i’m down for anything.”

what the fuck? one of these eight selflessly offering something? you’re genuinely touched. this really made him bigger in your eyes, and the cherry on top was his i’m down for anything, you actually feel, what? respect? maybe.

but you shake your head anyway. “not tonight, i’m really tired. i should go home and sleep. but thank you for offering. that was really sweet of you.”

“yeah, of course. i understand.” he looks a little disappointed, the actual fuck, but nods, respectful. okay daddy???

and you can tell he means it. he wants to return the favor, not just because he thinks he should or he wants to get something out of it(“i’m down for anything” anything has just going down on you and not getting anything from it in it) but because he’s attracted to you.

and i’m boutta fall off my chair he even walks you to the door like a gentleman, your best experience of a man following you to this door so far khm khm hyunjin trying to get some khm khm, and changbin wishes you would’ve stayed longer.

“thank you y/n, uh, thank you, stay safe, bye, thank you.” oh he means it.

the way he closes the door after you step out is gentlemanly too.

another one down. best experience so far. (chan would be punching his pillow if he knew about this)

changbin feels incredibly lucky. like unbelievably. more lucky than anything. his brain is releasing lots of good shit right now, bonding him harder to you, making him feel chemistry. he feels lighter from the orgasm too. this came really good for him now.

he knows most men in his position never get this, a beautiful, competent, emotionally intelligent woman who sees them and him this disgusting and still chooses to comfort them with her body and her kindness without asking for anything in return.

you’re actually an impressive woman. not just for your sex skills, but also for how you perform the next day. like nothing happened. you’re so good.

that’s nothing to hyunjin though. in the morning the second you walk into the practice room he waves you over with two fingers(this bitch), takes his little iced coffee from your hand. you always come with his iced coffee.

“morning, y/n.” he says, taking a sip. “you look tired. late night?” he stands next to you, both of you watching the other boys and some staff fuck around in the room, shoulder to shoulder without the shoulders actually touching, but really it’s because he doesn’t let you go. so he’s looking around the room, breathtaking. he smells good, expensive, luxury.

“mm.” you have minho’s coffee in your hand too, but he’s not here yet. “went to sleep just fine.”

“really? you’ve been busy lately.” he murmurs, looking around to make sure no one’s listening too closely. “helping a lot of people, huh?”

you just smile sweetly. “that’s my job.”

he huffs, a tiny little laugh, oh he wants you bad.

chan looks over at you. gives you an awkward hand raise. you wave back. hyunjin whistles next to you, seeing it. oh you want to hit him. but maybe… maybe in the playful smacking way now and not actually to death with a microphone.

meanwhile chan’s big mind is all why him and not me? why did you let jeongin inside you? it’s torturing him. poor thing.

changbin… acts really casual, good job baby. he’s a great actor. hyunjin standing next to you can’t even tell that anything happened last night at the very couch he sometimes beats his meat on.

he notices that changbin keeps looking at you with these grateful, almost lovesick eyes, but thinks it’s just a crush or whatever. sees that changbin wants to talk about something, assumes it’s for work.

oh his eye does twitch at jeongin giving you an enthusiastic little wave, though. also twitches at how sweetly you wave back. ugh, calm down, lovebirds. (you two are not even close, hyune)

later through he day even he’s not the only one fed up with jeongin being on your dick. han actually had to step in once with a “bro, come on, stop. sorry y/n.” but they love jeongin. so they tolerate it.

and it makes you bigger in their eyes, how you don’t react much, stay as professional.

okay now you got these four. already had four of these dicks in you, great.

and when i say the other staff has been noticing some shit. because the boys getting used to you isn’t subtle or in development anymore, how could it be? eight grown ass men, millionaires, grown fucking adults with international lives suddenly getting all close and friendly with their assistant.

for an example, you’re standing around checking shit for the boys when minho comes up to you, hums as a greeting, oh he loves to hear how formally you always (have to) greet him back, and he wraps both arms around your right one, and leans his entire weight on you. like a little standing up nap. you’re holding him up.

some older female staff walks by, does a double take, you give her a tired little shrug like what can i do? minho closes his eyes. grown man.

let’s not even mention the han bounce him incident.

or felix, because they know they can let themselves get comfortable with you and the staff’s job is to help them and not judge them so he’s supposed to do fuckwhat he wants, during something you have to watch over he walks up behind you, puts his chin on your shoulder, arms around your waist, sighs. “so tired.” he mumbles. stays like that for about ten minutes, silent, actually enjoying your body on his without the sexual way(though that’s why he came), later gets bored and wanders off. knows that other people from the outside view it as platonic.

other people also see how clingy jeongin is when you’re there, or helping him with something. ever since you fucked him he’s been unbearable. when you stand up to throw seungmin’s trash away jeongin tells you “don’t go far.” grown man. the other staff keep exchanging looks. figure he got attached in a platonic way. pfftt.

and oh, ooh, OOOOH when hyunjin the little whore sat in your lap. acted like it was joking around, as if he sat in one of the other guys’ laps, that unserious, but the way he spread his thighs and leaned back on your chest and got sleepy told a different story. he stayed there for a while, wiggling occasionally, until you finally pushed him off. pushed the guy off who’s dick you had in your mouth. let’s consider that you, someone this low compared to them, have the knowledge that you can push them around and no negative consequences will come meanwhile staff are supposed to obey to anything, is a huge word. you made this spot for yourself.

chan is not that touchy in front of people, thank fuck. so the staff has no business seeing any signs of attachment on him. that’s great.

changbin stops following you on the halls. no negative reason for that, absolutely not, it’s actually positive, he’s a little nervous. little bitch. you just sucked his dick so good that he’s thinking about you lots nowadays. doesn’t mean he completely doesn’t interact with you, like during one break he rested his head on your shoulder while pretending to look at your tablet, what you were doing on it. awww, okay binnie. but still, for now he’s still a little shy. like how does he even keep up a long conversation with you after that??

and oh seungmin hugged you after a bad day. not a quick little hug that would be like a bro hug with the others. more of a colleague hug, but he still wanted your body on his. he came back from a solo whatnot looking drained, saw you in the hallway, walked up, mumbled a hi, wrapped his skinny arms around you, face buried in your shoulder.

you hugged him back, rocked, bounced him a little. you’re good at this too.

and… people don’t usually hug him like that, adult people don’t usually hug like that, we’ve grown out of it, of giving these comforting hugs with the bouncing and rocking that we give to upset children, so it felt extra nice to him, extra comforting.

he held you tight for a while before pulling away and muttering “thanks” and raised his hand to another staff member walking past after he left you there. his dick is important to him but so is physical reassurance.

separation anxiety. not just from each other, they’ve always had that, years of shared trauma and just getting along in general and whatnot, but now it’s spreading to you. you make them feel safe in their skins. you don’t judge, you don’t demand, you help. you let them be what they can’t be to the public. so now they get… twitchy when you’re not in sight.

they need you, and that’s cute. or well, way cuter than the way they dgaf about your feelings.

the other staff have started with the “did you see how close she got with stray kids?” “han was in her lap again. bouncing. he’s twenty five.” “hyunjin rested his elbow on her shoulder, is he even allowed to do that?” “jeongin is on y/n all the time.” “what’s with the new assistant and bang chan going into rooms all the time and him coming out looking weird? are they fucking?” they don’t understand it. but they don’t say anything, the boys are the money makers, the ones who pay everyone’s salaries. you catch some looks but who cares.

and fuck’s sake boys, this is a workplace. a high pressure, multibillion dollar company, right? and you let them live their needs out. now it’s not just them being inappropriate, you’re actively enabling it. you’re also in the fault here, not just the boys taking advantage of you, because you consciously let them.

it’s unprofessional, wrong, ethically. legally. morally. if this ever got out, the company would put it as you seducing them. you’d be the villain, the slutty assistant who corrupted her innocent idols. you’d get fired, a case of inappropriate relationship with staff, even though they’re the ones initiating.

you’re the only woman in their close circle, it’s a massive power imbalance. you’re paid to be here. they’re your bosses. you’re under them. they’re so bad here. you’re not a saint either, but c’mon, we can all see the level of where you stand on the inappropriate scale and where do they.

well, but who cares, you take dick! changbin has been really worked up about his turn lately too. he feels really good. and so full of feelings. and he can’t keep it to himself.

what does that look like? it looks like him sitting next to han in one of the recording rooms(well not the booth, at where the others watch the one currently recording, fuck knows what they’re called) starts with a “hey… uh. can i tell you something?”

han raises his eyebrows, sipping his drink with one hand, his phone in the other. “what’s up?”

changbin looks around, then mumbles “dude, uh—” how does he even get this out? “y/n sucked me off too.” smiling ear to ear btw. “like she… like she was at my place and…” imitates how he held your hair.

han freezes with his drink to his mouth. his eyes go big, face in a :o shape. “no way. wait. for real? really?”

“yeah.”

“bro.” he slaps changbin’s arm, grinning like the fucking dipshit he is. “how was it? was she good? i’m so jealous it hurts. good for you, man. seriously. tell me everything.”

tell him everything he did.

then lix. both sitting on the floor against a wall, talking, tells him that “y/n gave me head. when hyune was gone, it was amazing.”

the smirk felix smirks. “no shit? really?” when binnie nods, lix leans his head back against the wall, smiling. “keep me updated, yeah? i’m happy for you, bro. how’d it feel?”

he gets it detailed too. oh they’re just giggling the fuck around.

he gets a “hm. nice.” from seungmin. a “what? congrats.” from minho. an excited “that’s awesome.” from jeongin. hyunjin didn’t even mind it, he kinda did the same thing, needed all details though. and then a “she did?” from chan paired with a big smile and a clap on bin’s shoulder with a “thanks for telling me.”

chan has to throw up.

only if you knew what you do to him, only if he fucking communicated.

changbin deals relatively good with what he got from you. for hyunjin, it just tied him to you more. chan, oh we know, it created this tension between you two. he wants you again. badly. he wants you the way innie had you(little shit told every single detail, but so did chan about his own turn, hyunjin, changbin), using him for your own pleasure too. he wants to feel wanted like that. he wants to be inside you so fucking bad it’s making him stupid. like actually sets him back during the day. but anyways, the point of this, is how jeongin didn’t take it well.

well, he took it very well, but that’s where the problem comes from. good boys wait and respect women, that’s what he has been always told. but… that’s just not him, is it? after having you and not currently being with you when you’re close to him and the boys, like you come to ask chan something and jeongin immediately stands up and stands next to you, anyways, then every few minutes he zones out and thinks of you on top of him, tits out, pussy sliding up and down his cock. he blushes randomly. he giggles to himself. he gets hard randomly and has to hide behind his hoodie.

his brain is pretty much “it wasn’t that bad, right? she wanted it. she was helping me. it’s not like i forced anything. god probably understands stress relief…” then forgets all about it he now knows what you feel like from the inside. well, kinda. condom. but he did have his face swimming in you, if that counts!

you don’t have any problems with this. oh even better, some people above you tell you that your salary has been raised. like significantly. it’s a fat raise. effective immediately.

fuck yes. fuck yes. fuck YES. all that dick sucking, ass spreading, patience is finally paying off in actual money. you deserve every single won. you’ve earned it.

and you don’t know this but some of the boys themselves made that happen. like chan. he made sure the higher ups knew how great you were. how hard you worked.

and, you won’t believe it, even hyunjin put in good words. but like… without anyone knowing. but take the fact that that evil little brat actually said something nice about you behind your back. duality of man, he still wants you bad but he also acknowledged that you make their lives easier. that you’re good at your job. maybe there’s a tiny human somewhere deep in there after all. okay there is a tiny human, who’s been hurt so much by the world already. that’s partly why you can never stay mad at him for long.

and… and minho was in it too. he said some good things when higher people asked how the new assistant was doing.

now that we’re at the hyunjin topic. kinda few nights after bin told him that you sucked him off too, they’re both at their dorm. the irritated situation faded by now, kinda.

anyways, they’re talking, hyunjin is on the couch, asks changbin “so where did she suck you off anyway?”

changbin points to the exact spot on the couch right next to where hyunjin got sucked off by you. “right there.”

hyunjin stares at the couch. then at changbin. then back at the couch. “you’re fucking kidding me.”

“what?”

hyunjin stands up, grabbing changbin in a headlock. “you little shit—on the same fucking couch? i’ll kill you.” average i’ll kill you user. update your boy vocabulary, hyunjin.

changbin laughs, trying to squirm away. “yah— stop— it just happened—”

they start choking each other the fucking dumbasses. rolling around on the couch which you’ve been on twice now, servicing different members.

that’s exactly why hyunjin just feels so… ugh. ugh. uuugghhghg!!!

he wants you now.

or more likely, next day. well, leaves you alone for most of the start of the day(except when you give him his morning coffee) all that until lunch.

the second he’s done eating his little whatever what makes him healthy, he stands up and goes to you. you, who doesn’t even eat fucking lunch because you don’t have the time to. and when you would have time, seungmin start screeching for something.

so, you’re as usual standing up and at your fucking work, just left your boys there they’re about to finish eating anyway, walking into a smaller little hallway to get to something. doesn’t even matter what, just that while you’re getting it, hyunjin walks up, leans one shoulder on the wall. stops and watches you.

“y/n. come over this afternoon.”

you look up at him. “this afternoon? hyunjin, you finish late today. you have that—”

“i’ll leave early. they won’t care. i’ll say i’m not feeling well. just… come over. please.”

his eyes are doing all the work. he’s learned how to use them. the little tilt of his head, the way his voice moves, he all learned to do this. he’s so fucking good at this.

you sigh. “it’s the middle of the day. people will notice if you dip.”

“let them notice.” he mutters. “i need you. now. not tonight. not later. just come over.”

his hand brushes your waist, light. okay, wait, hyunjin, unprofessional. stop.

“hyunjin, this is really not the time. this is one of the days that are completely full.”

those eyes. he’s an unfair little cunt. “please, y/n. i’m not asking for the whole night. just… an hour. two. i’ll leave and meet you at the dorm. it’ll just be us.”

i’ll just be us.

you hesitate.

“please don’t make me beg in the hallway.” he whispers. whispers. fuck he won.

humans are just mammals at the end of the day. advanced, self aware, language using mammals, all civilized and moral and evolved, but take away the suits and the contracts and the million dollars and we’re still animals. primates. things with the same basic want as every other creature that’s ever walked this planet. and what do mammals want more than anything? to fuck. to reproduce. to pass on their genes. that’s older than language, older than culture, older than shame.

every living thing wants to reproduce. bacteria split, flowers bloom and get pollinated, dogs hump legs, birds do dances, all of it with the same goal, to continue the species. humans are the only ones who turned it into something for pleasure, something that feels good even when it won’t make a baby. but still, we want to have sex as much as everything else does.

fuck. feel good. connect. release.

these boys have been denied that fucking basic need for years. constant training, diets, cameras in their faces, people watching their every move, dorms where privacy is a myth.

they’re young healthy males in their physical prime, and their bodies can’t get what it needs. of course they’re obsessed with you. of course they’re pushy and needy and disgusting.

their biology is fighting their environment.

now hyunjin especially. he’s sensitive under allat attitude. he feels everything deeply. and he got a taste of real, uncomplicated pleasure, your mouth, your body, how you let him be selfish, he needs it more now than he did the first time you sucked him off because his body, his mind, remembers how good it felt. how for a few minutes he wasn’t an idol, he was just a man getting his dick sucked.

he’s a mammal who found a safe source of dopamine and oxytocin. of course he’ll want that all the time now.

“fine.” you say quietly. defeated in your tone. “text me when you leave. but only for a couple hours, i mean it.” aren’t you the assistant here? who are you to tell him what to do?

he doesn’t seem to mind though. he smiles. it’s pretty. “thank you.”

he steps back, gives you one last long look, fucking buys you right there, and walks away. midday fuck negotiated.

he really wants to take you back to the dorm in his car but even he isn’t that stupid. getting caught with his assistant slipping into the passenger seat in the middle of the afternoon would be career suicide. so he waits. texts you about two hours later, needy little shit.

hyunjin: come over now. i left. door’s unlocked. just walk in.

you do, still wearing your work clothes, bag slung over your shoulder, drop it off next to the door too. hyunjin’s there, leaning on the wall in home clothes(what he wants to seem like home clothes, so a black hoodie, gray sweats, hair messy but he really made his hair stand like this because when he’s actually comfy at home then his whole head is flat and he’s in underwear only. performative dickhead)

he watches you take your shoes off with this stupid little smile on his face with his eyebrows raised. he can’t take you seriously anymore. you’re just… cute. like aw you’re taking your shoes off, what else big girl things can you do?? sweetpea.

that’s why the second you’re fully upright he’s on you, grabs your face with both hands and kisses you hard.

and even with chan you hesitated to kiss. you didn’t kiss the other two either. and that was for a very good reason.

even though he forced himself on you, you kiss back, because he’s good at it. because you want it. because he tilts your head exactly how he wants, sucking on your bottom lip, then licking into your mouth, wanting to taste you. wanting to taste his assistant.

his body presses you forward, pushing you back until you’re on the wall. almost like he tries to physically force you to want him as much as he wants you right now.

it works.

damn he knows how to kiss. slow deep strokes of his tongue, little bites on your lip, tilts his head to get even deeper.

“mmh—” you make that sound into his lips, surprised at how fast he’s moving.

while he’s still kissing you, tongue fucking your mouth while you two could be getting down to it already because you have to get back, one of his hands leaves your face, down your body, cups your pussy over your jeans, and squeezes. gropes.

you pull back from the kiss with a gasp. “h— slow the fuck down, dude—”

hyunjin laughs on your mouth, lips brushing yours as he keeps rubbing you over your jeans, now looking into your eyes.

with big, shining, beautiful eyes.

“why?” he murmurs, his lips drop the uptilt. he looks serious. “you came here for this, didn’t you? don’t act shy now.”

he kisses you again. trying to make you soak through the denim, moving his fingers, really groping into you. his tongue is back in your mouth, licking and sucking, smiling into you when you… oh fuck off y/n, why are you humping his hand??

he feels a lot because of that, because of you. feels a lot in general. relief that you came, frustration that he had to wait, greed now that he finally has you in his palm. he’s so hard already.

part of you is annoyed at how fast he’s moving, how entitled he is, how he thinks he can just summon you in the middle of the day and grope you. but really, he doesn’t just think it, because he’s right. but of course the other part is for liking how bad he wants you. how desperate he is. how this beautiful, famous, rich, sensitive boy needs you now and you have him like this.

so you kiss him back, biting his lip, and he moans into your mouth.

he wants to bend you over their couch so the legacy goes on, wants to hear you moan for him, wants to prove he’s better than the others. he wants everything for himself.

this of course goes back to being better than other men. dick comparing is something no man can really shake off, no amount of evolution will get rid of that for us. so it’s not just his needs and traumas calling for you, but also his dumb little man mindset. hyunjin is a man.

but underneath all that lustful asshole football watcher behavior is that he’s scared. scared you like them more, scared you’re not a forever thing, not because he likes you, but because he likes his dick and his dick’s important to him. this is all just being selfish. so he kisses you to make you stay with him, trying to be good enough, desperate enough, pretty enough, that you’ll keep coming back to him.

“missed you.” he mutters.

oh?

he squeezes you again but harder, leans in to bite your bottom lip, then pulls away. “gonna fuck you today, y/n.”

this asshole. this prick. this heartless evil cunt.

also the dickhead that you let pick you up.

yeah hyunjin slides his hands under your thighs, lifts you off the floor, and you wrap your legs around his waist. not a thought crosses your mind. none of them has ever done this to you yet. he even carries you down the short hallway to his room(okay that makes sense why other reason would he pick you up for if not to carry you somewhere). breathing hard into your mouth, groan, growl, finally having you in his arms is both relief and rage.

why the fuck are you attracted to him?

who cares, he kicks his bedroom door open, carries you inside, drops you onto his bed. you bounce once on the mattress, looking up at him. you look so good.

he turns around, walks back to the door, shuts it. the sound itself is intimate.

then he’s back, crawling up the bed like a predator, trying to ignore the feeling of his boner, and when he’s hovering over you, he kisses you again.

his body lowers onto yours, chest pressing to your tits, hips settling between your spread thighs. you’re into the kiss too, lips sucking, little moans coming from his throat into your mouth and neck. your body is reacting to him even while your brain is calling him every name in the book.

he bites your bottom lip, then soothes it with his tongue, then presses lots of fast little smooches on your mouth before kissing it lovingly. fuck his ass where did he learn that from.

he wants to feel your nipples harden right in his palm, only fantasizes about it for now, though. for some reason he doesn’t have any sense of urgency when it comes to sex.

even though he’s so hard it has to hurt.

his hands go down, gripping your ass, really having a grip on you to pull you up to his hips, to his cock so he can grind into you. he uses you. his breathing is ragged, little moans slipping out between kisses, he can’t hold them back.

he wants you so bad. he wants to be inside you. he wants to hear your noises.

you tug his hair. he groans, hips stopping, smiling into the kiss.

but he’s hard and impatient, doesn’t want to waste precious seconds he could be using to get you naked. his hands are moving down to your shirt, fingers fumbling with the buttons. he yanks at the fabric, pops a couple buttons in his rush, fighting the material off your shoulders, it’s keeping him from what he wants. he’s actually violent.

you help him a little, shrugging it off.

then he’s at your bra, unhooks it(needs both hands, the baby) pulls it down your arms, and when your tits are out, bare and heavy in your boss’s room, his eyes actually change. you watch his reaction, how he smacks his mouth a tiny tiny bit, how his eyebrows drop, how unclear his pretty eyes are. he stares like he’s never seen tits before, and he’s seen lots.

he fights himself up in a comfortable position to grope your tits. squeezes, hard, enjoys how his palms are full of flesh, whining a little at how your nipples do harden in the middles of his palms.

he’s rough. not cruel on purpose, just so fucking eager and horny that he doesn’t notice how hard he’s handling you. his fingers dig in, kneading, pulling, pushing your tits together. it hurts, but you’re here for work anyway. this is your job(def not).

his hands can barely leave your tits so that he can go down and undo, yank your pants down your hips with rough tugs, dragging your panties with them. just pulls, forces until they’re off your legs. and then he reaches down and tugs your socks off too, one by one, tossing them somewhere behind him.

“better.” he mutters.

so you’re naked now. completely. lying on his bed with your legs slightly spread while he kneels between them, still fully dressed, staring at your pussy.

he looks like someone ripped his hair and yanked his head around.

he grabs your thighs and yanks them apart so hard your hips lift off the bed for a second. leans down, spits on your pussy, then buries his face in it. shakes his head around like a dog with a toy. no focus on making you feel good, just rubs his whole face in your wetness, tongue flapping around in you, nose grinding against your clit, lips sucking randomly at your folds.

he thinks it feels good for you. it doesn’t. it’s just overwhelming, too much pressure in random places, his tongue missing your clit more than it hits it.

but you moan anyway, soft, sweet, because that’s what he needs right now. you’re here to help. you’re here to let him feel like a man.

after about a minute he pulls back, breathing hard, lips shiny with you. he looks fucking wild again like he has fucking rabies, then… goes soft again. not gentle exactly, but charming. he crawls up your body, hovering over you, and kisses you.

“you’re so pretty like this.” he murmurs into your mouth, hand sliding down to cup your pussy again, now his fingers slipping through the wet mess left there. “you missed this too, didn’t you? missed me.” he’s nice because he wants to be nice, this is on purpose. “c’mon, look.”

that look was for how he helps you move, gentle???, pulling you up, you’re fucking speechless, guiding you onto your knees, pulling your ass up to him.

he runs his hands over your back, down the curve of your spine, then grips your ass and spreads you open, staring, looking around, getting to know you there.

you arch your back a little more, pushing your ass toward him, letting him look. if you’re here, might as well go along with it.

hyunjin moans behind you, hands spreading you wider, deciding where to start.

shit. you’re really letting this prick hit.

“hm? no condom?” he asks, his eyes all up in your pussy.

“condom.”

he sighs. “seriously?”

“yes, seriously.”

he makes an annoyed little sound but obeys. slaps your ass once, hard, childish, then climbs off the bed.

you stay on your knees, ass up, listening to him rummage through one of his drawers, slap shit around.

“where the fuck did i put them…” he mutters, opening and closing drawers. “i swear i had some right here.”

you turn your head, cheek on the sheets, watching him. he’s so pretty.

“check the that drawer again. no, that one. the top one. you probably threw them in there since didn’t need it jerking off last night.”

hyunjin snorts, digging. “shut up. i don’t jerk off that much.”

“sure you don’t.”

he finds the box finally, shakes it triumphantly. “got them. see? i’m prepared.”

“woow.” in the flattest voice ever.

he laughs, walking back to the bed. on the way he reaches out and caresses your ass with one hand. and that’s not even about the it’s not about you mindset, he genuinely just wanted to do that for you. he finds you sweet, after all. you gained his respect and his liking towards you.

he climbs back on the bed, yanks his shirt over his head in with one hand, tossing it somewhere. his pants and underwear next, shoved down his thighs and kicked off. the socks stay on.

he pumps his cock once, twice, slow, genuinely just lazy, just again no sense of urgency, watching your ass. then he tears open the condom packet and rolls it on, giving it a few strokes too.

“happy now?” he asks with fake annoyance as he settles behind you again.

“ecstatic.”

he laughs and slaps your ass again. “good.”

he lines himself up, pretty head pressing into your entrance, fucks the tip only in two or three times, then pushes in slowly.

bottoms out with a long, satisfied moan, putting his hands on your love handles. there we go.

he’s skinny but longer than you remembered from your mouth. makes your eyes shut and your mouth fall open in a little o. he feels better than he did in your throat. deeper. fuller.

you moan. he’s good, feels good.

what is hyunjin if not an impatient little bitch though, he adjusts his grip on your hips and starts fucking you.

“that’s it.” he mutters, clapping his hips with yours.

you two are, even if not always seriously, half the time kinda just playfully, but always at each other’s throats. yet the second he’s inside you, your bodies just work. he fits. the angle is perfect. the way he moves feels so good, you’re getting fucking goosebumps.

his hips snaps to your ass, his pretty cock dragging in and out of you, rough, uncontrolled. hits so good but it’s all about his pleasure. everytime he bottoms out you feel his smooth balls slap your clit. he’s so deep it almost hurts, makes your eyes roll back.

you’re moaning. actually moaning. not the ones you give the others to stroke their egos, this dumb fuck’s cock actually makes you act like this. you’re drooling a little, that’s how good it feels.

hyunjin is too focused to give more sounds that his loud breathing and little moans tome to time. just chasing his own pleasure.

“fuuuuck. mhm, mhm, yeah.” okay hyunjin.

his hips go harder, faster, the sound of skin on skin getting louder, snappier. you’re moaning into his sheets, pussy fluttering around his long cock. it missed him too. the chemistry is insane between you two, disgustingly.

his low, breathy groans turn into these pretty whimpers slowly. soft little “ah— ahh—” everytime he bottoms out. he feels so good, you make him feel so good.

it’s so fucking animal. hyune’s back is straight as a rod, shoulders rolled back, head fallen forward so his messy hair hangs in his eyes. he uses your handles to handle and pull you back onto his cock with every brutal thrust. selfish, grunting, a man.

the sound of his hips slapping on your ass fills the room. rhythmic, obscene, is the right word. porn like.

you’re melting away. your face is pressed into his sheets, mouth open, eyes unfocused at how he slams his pretty cock into you over and over. you feel just as good as he does, makes your spine give up and fall into his hands better, melt with hyunjin.

heavenly sounds come from hyunjin. groans, breathy whimpers, little gasps, moans. he’s so bitchy and pretty and almost vulnerable. he’s letting himself feel how good you are.

he feels like the fucking king. hwang hyunjin, the visual, the untouchable pretty boy, the one everyone wants but no one really gets close to, balls deep in his own assistant. his employee. the powerimbalance is hitting every single button he has. you’re beneath him in the hierarchy. you work for him. and you’re letting him fuck you the middle of the day because he asked.

it makes him feel better. it makes him feel desired, not how the cameras or fans or fans do, because that’s all fake, and this is real. human in human. sex.

and you just calmed him down. hyunjin is calm. you, just again, made an idol forget about his soul crushing problems.

you, just again, are the best.

he adjust his grip your hips, pulls you back onto his cock with every thrust, watching how your ass ripples, how your pussy slips around his length, how you’re dripping for him. his ego is swelling bigger than his dick. it’s toxic. it’s ugly. it’s human nature. it’s exactly what he needs to feel like a man instead of just a pretty face.

he speeds up. fast. selfish. his hips snap against your ass with wet slaps. he loves to listen to it, to chase it, your pussy, the way you flutter and squeeze around him, the way your moans get higher and breathier.

his cock feels amazing inside you. reached deep, hitting such good spots. your eyes are rolling back you’re so glad you took this job.

he’s leaking so much into the condom it might just pop. but would that be so bad? yours and his genes together into some deadbeat asshole baby? why not, actually.

his sounds are fucking heavenly. now all his little sounds are moans, not anything else. that pretty voice of his, what he can do almost everything with, now is just animal noises as he fucks you, fills you. it tells you without words how good you feel, how he never wants to stop.

your arms are shaking, barely holding you up. your mouth is open, drooling onto his sheets, soft desperate moans coming from it.

you’re not even trying to perform anymore like you did with all of them until now, you’re just taking it. that’s what you’re good for.

here, with you, he doesn’t have to be perfect. he can be mean. he can be selfish. he can be desperate and loud and pathetic and you still let him.

he gives all of his into fucking you. like he would go faster but he can’t. it’s physically impossible, his hips are pounding to your ass, cock dragging perfectly along your walls, balls slapping on your skin, his endlessly skilled hands pulling you back(fuck it feels so good) to get the most of you he can.

his body is saying everything for him.

and neither of you has any fucking clue that while hyunjin is lost in the feeling of you, head fallen forward, back now hunched a bit, and you’re you’re melting into the mattress as this animal fucks you, the front door clicks open.

keys jingle. shoes get kicked off.

changbin steps inside.

he stops. are those… your shoes? right next to the door. and… your bag? the fuck?

he listens. hears the moaning. hyunjin’s, mostly, but yours too. softer. the unmistakable sound of someone getting fucked.

oh how your voice makes his tummy flip.

he stands there. mouth slightly open. face going through about fifteen emotions in three seconds.

…fuck’s sake.

hyunjin doesn’t hear a thing. he’s too deep in his own head, to deep in you.

he locks up. his hips stutter as he tries to instinctively pump his cum into you, up, up, up, but the condom stops that from happening.

“ahh, fuck— yeah! ahh…”

he buries himself deep one last time and stays there. he’s satisfied, relieved, the weeks of frustration are finally draining out of him.

he gives your ass one hard slap, mutters a “fuck yeah” then pulls out.

just like that.

he peels the condom off, ties it, gets up, throws it in some trash, then starts pulling his clothes back on.

no aftercare, mind you.

you’re still on your knees, ass up, pussy throbbing and aching and empty.

you were close. actually close.

you sigh, so tired, and start dressing too. whatever. you’re not about to touch yourself in hyunjin’s room. not today.

“thanks.” he says. “needed that.”

“hm.” you button your shirt, fix your hair in the mirror. your pussy is still wet and just soooo frustrated, clit throbbing, but you shove it down. professional. always professional.

hyunjin pulls his hoodie back on, his boner had gone down too, and gives you one last look. “bye.” with a little wave.

fuck’s sake. this dickhead. you mutter a bye out too, then leave. get your shoes, your bag, no idea that binnie came home since thqt.

a couple minutes pass.

hyunjin sighs, does that dipshit thing men do where they slap both of their thighs before standing up and acting like it’s hard, then walks into the kitchen, opens the fridge, and grabs one of his fuckass little straw drinks. imagine some overpriced vitamin water with a bright pink straw. really the cherry on top. he stabs the straw in, takes a sip, and closes the fridge door.

then changbin walks in.

silence.

changbin stops in the doorway. hyunjin stops midsip. their eyes meet.

they both know. changbin knows hyunjin just fucked you in the room right down the hall. hyunjin knows changbin knows. changbin knows hyunjin knows that changbin knows.

hyunjin raises both eyebrows slowly, then walks to changbin, but really just to walk past him. while walking past, hyunjin claps bin on the shoulder lighty, still loudly sipping his stupid little drink through the stupid little straw with a sluuuuuurp.

changbin stands there, staring in front of himself.

hyunjin walks into his room, orgasm achieved, shared assistant cracked, dresses up, gets his shit, then leaves. goes back to work.

you both do. fucking professionalism at its finest. you’re an expert at acting like you weren’t bent over hyunjin’s bed getting your soul fucked out less than an hour ago. hyunjin is fresh and glowing and annoying as ever, waving at everyone. oh bitch please.

but he doesn’t even glance at you more than normal. professionalism. you appreciate that.

when he needs water he says “y/n” in the exact same tone as always. when you hand it to him he takes it with a “thanks” and nothing more. it’s impressive how well both of you are acting.

so good that the others don’t suspect a thing. well, you didn’t notice them do, but maybe mainly because jeongin was following you around.

you catch hyunjin’s eye once across the practice room. he raises one eyebrow, then looks away like nothing happened. you go back to giving the others things. wipe minho’s sweat with a towel yourself.

the next day he already tells the others about it. during some break in one of the smaller practice rooms, while everyone’s sprawled on the floor drinking water and whatever they have to, hyunjin sitting against the wall, jeongin on his phone, han lying on his back staring at the ceiling and deep in his sad little thoughts, felix scrolling, he has a double chin it’s so adorable and hot, changbin is texting a friend, chan is staring in front of himself, so does minho but he’s drinking water while at it, and seungmin is also texting someone.

“oh yeah, by the way. yesterday afternoon me and y/n fucked.”

…

why is he an animal?

okay anyways han sits up with a “really?!”

jeongin’s head snaps up from his phone, the exact expression like from that clip where the others were saying peaches and he heard bitches or for whatever reason he acted like that then. “what?”

felix smiles ear to ear. “how?” which is their way of saying details, dude.

oh hyunjin loves this. mentally giggling and kicking his feet around. “from the back. i was like, invited her over, and she was immediately down for it—“ no you weren’t, you told him a hundred times that you two are busy. “—and i had her on all fours on my bed. y’know, i wrapped it up, she was moaning like crazy. it felt so good. it was—“ he leans forward, it pretty cute because all eight do with him, while he whispers “tight. she was tight. we fucked for like… an hour.” ten minutes max, hyune.

changbin is… staring at the floor, smiling. chan has his mouth open(he’s not upset about hyunjin fucking you. for some reason??). minho gives “mhm”s from time to time. seungmin audibly giggles. felix is leaning forward still, mouth open, smiling too. jeongin feels… something bad, or maybe good?, in his stomach, chest. han is staring with such huge eyes.

“i had her back arched so nice. she was moaning like ahh ahh—“ why is he fucking hilarious “—best fuck i’ve had in months. maybe ever.” he puts his hands up, then slaps them down on his thigh.

and the congratulations he gets. shoving, laughing, asking about details, slapping on him. why are men like this?

the thing is, only you actually (kinda) dislike hyunjin. only you hated him. he never hated you. he just looked down on you.

all of them did, at the beginning, we know that. they saw you as useful, sure, but not as a full person. not as a woman with her own thoughts and feelings and desires. you were convenient. reliable. there. as we clearly fucking know, hyunjin especially treated you like that.

it felt like hate to you because it was dismissive and mean. but to him it was just… normal. that’s what you deserved as a pretty female staff member. you weren’t on his level.

now he’s starting to actually perceive you. somewhere between the first blowjob and yesterday, he kinda got that you’re not just a warm hole, you’re a person. a woman. you’re funny. nice to be around.

and hyunjin is really sensitive. and like, he kinda knows that you saw the worst of him (the tantrums, the mean shit he threw at your head that he still very much thinks about) and you still let him fuck you. you still let him be a man.

he’s starting to like you. not just want you, like you. he especially really likes that you don’t beg for his attention but still give him yours. that you’re confident and in control. it turns him on.

he’s starting to see you as good company.

also, someone whose presence doesn’t drain him.

he’s starting to like you.

okay yeah, we talked a lot about jeongin following you and being on your dick metaphorically and sometimes literally trying to be, but how does that actually look like?

it looks like 10am, when you’re refilling the bottles of the boys who use bottles when jeongin stands next to you.

“hi y/n.”

“hi. you need something?”

“mmmm not really. no.”

you sigh, shove his bottle into his hand. “here. drink.”

“thanks.” manages to drink with two hands on the bottle. you watch the whole thing.

point of this was, he came to you with no idea what he wanted. no point of that conversation.

or you’re walking down the hallway carrying towels for the boys and jeongin fucking appears out of fucking nowhere, matching your pace.

“hey y/n.” he says, happy to see you. he glances left and right quickly, checking for staff, then steps a tiny bit closer. “you need help with those? they look heavy.” he tries to look manly.

“i’m good, thanks though.”

he nods, walks beside you, hands in his hoodie pocket, sneaking little looks at your face. his cheeks are pink.

then he tilts his head. left, right. pokes his mouth to the side. “you’ve been running around all day, don’t you get tired?” (that’s such a basic thing to say, well yes it is, it’s because he couldn’t think of anything better to say. just made the fastest small talk that came into his mind. we appreciate his effort though, keep it up, innie)

“sometimes. but it’s fine.”

he hums, then does that thing where he “accidentally” lets the back of his hand brush yours. he pulls it away fast when he hears footsteps ahead, every little touch, every minute of your attention feeds that new addiction in him.

the others are starting to get visibly irritated.

another time, during a long waiting period, you’re sitting on a couch, ordering something for seungmin because he shoved his card into your hand and asked you to do it(let’s not even talk about how much he trust you to give you his money like that) and jeongin sits down next to you. he looks around first, making sure noone is paying attention, then relaxes a little.

“long day, huh?” he says, again just having no idea what to say but really wanting to talk to you.

“yeah. you holding up okay?”

he shrugs. “better now.” okay flirt.

“i’m glad.” you’re not being dry on purpose, just staying professional.

by the way, you always being this calm and neutral towards them turns them on so much. makes you so hot in their eyes.

he nods, then sneaks his hand between you two on the couch, letting his pinky brush yours. it’s such a small touch but it’s rebellious for his career.

when someone walks past he pulls his hand back instantly, acting like he was just stretching. waits for your reaction. you, to not leave him hanging, raise your brows at him, and that’s it. oh he got what he wanted. well, what he really wants is probably a handy but he’s also satisfied with any microreaction.

or you’re waiting for the elevator and fuck’s sake jeongin walks up next to you, checking the hallway both ways before stepping closer.

“hey. you heading out soon?” he asks.

“yeah, after i drop these papers off.”

he nods, then after making sure the coast is clear, stands against the wall next to the elevator. “cool. um… i was thinking. maybe next time you come over we could watch something? not like… not like a date or anything. just… hang out.”

“mm, i’m not sure. not a no, just, y’know, i’m busy too.”

“okay. just thought i’d ask.” he mumbles, looking away, so trying to look nonchalant. “anyways, you sleep okay last night? you look… good. rested, i mean.” this asshole. insert that video back from years ago when the whole crowd slapped on their foreheads. (this)

“i slept fine. you?”

“yeah! i mean, kinda. kept thinking about… stuff. but it was good stuff.” he smiles shyly, then catches himself and looks around. you want to kick him he’s that pathetic.

he genuinely really just wants to have a good relationship with you now. wants you to like him.

“talk to you later?” he asks, hopeful.

“yeah, later.”

you’re so glad he didn’t go into the elevator with you, then there would be hellevator. just watch him go back to the others, stealing one last glance over his shoulder. you want to slap his head back forward.

this dumb bitch is going to get you fired one day. why is he like this? why are they all like this? you sucked his dick once and now he thinks you’re married. fucking dipshit.

and… jeongin doesn’t consciously think “y/n is my girlfriend.” but his instict is treating you like one, he’s treating you like one. you’re the person he wants to show off for, flexing his biceps because oh girls like that, telling you about his day, trying to look cool, the person he gets excited to see. and being near you makes the constant pressure, the fear of not being good enough, the loneliness in his head disappear for a bit.

which would be so much easier if seungmin wouldn’t have developed a habit, very bold habit of letting his hand find your ass whenever he thinks he can get away with it.

???

it happens multiple times a day now. during breaks, in hallways, when you’re handing him something, he’d feel up a palmful of you, appreciating it, or slapping it, then acts like nothing happened. like oh that wasn’t him. did anything even happen? you okay y/n?

creep.

ooookay you’re not even mad anymore. you’ve accepted it, lowkey workplace harassment but you consent.

and like… you do have a great ass.

he wants to fuck it. he wants to eat it. he wants to slap it red and watch it jiggle while he rails you from behind. he wants to cum on it, watch it drip down between your cheeks, then push it back inside with his fingers or cock or wait do you have toys? okay he’ll explore that fantasy later. he wants to make you sit on his face, smother him with it while he eats you from behind. he wants to leave marks on it, handprints, bite marks, the imprint of his hips. he wants to watch it bounce while you ride him reverse cowgirl. he wants to use it, squeezing and spreading and slapping whenever he feels like it. he’s obsessed with the way it moves when you walk. the way it looks when you bend over. the way it feels in his hand, perfect to grip. once he was actually close to nutting hands free just from imagining burying his face between your cheeks and motorboating them while you moan.

sometimes, when he thinks noone’s looking, he adjusts himself in his pants just because he looked at your back side.

fucking men and their ass fixation.

fucking men and their skills. their abilities. what they learned, how to use their eyes on you. they learned it from years of fanmeets, stages, cameras, they’ve been trained for years how to look at fans, the “i’m looking at you but only you” stare.

now they want you to feel what their fans feel.

once with felix you were handing him a new shirt he asked for from his bag(again, trust that he just lets you dig around in there, but the seungmin letting you have basically all his money in your hand is still bigger) when he(still talking about felix) grabbed both of your hands, exactly like he does with fans at fanmeets and looked up at you with the most angelic, charming eyes, thumbs stroking the backs of your hands.

“thank you so much.” he said, smiling that practiced heartfluttering smile, voice soft and intimate like you were the only girl in the universe. “you always take such good care of me.”

you almost laughed in his face.

you immediately go it that he was using his fan service technique on you. the same one he uses on every other person. it didn’t affect you.

“felix, i’m not buying lightsticks.”

he realized what he was doing, yes he wasn’t conscious that he slipped, so he didn’t even want to, then he dropped your hands and laughed awkwardly, muttered out a “force of habit.”

if you were anyone else, he would have started to explain himself with the speed of light. but with you he knows he doesn’t need to. that’s pretty sweet, after all.

this also happened with minho. he, also did it on accident. he was tired. really tired. not the tired that he was about to fall out his chair, just slow in the head.

you handed him water and suddenly he gave you the biggest, shiniest, most angelic smile you’ve ever seen. eyes sparkling, head tilted, voice so forced “thank you so much, y/n~ you’re always so kind.” he caught himself. the smile dropped instantly. he looked at you. you looked at him. he mumbled “…never mind. sorry.” even he looked slightly disturbed by it.

they’re all trained manipulators. years of it. they know exactly how to use their eyes, their voices, their bodies to make people feel things. and now they’re using it on you, constantly. little looks. their angelic voices. touches. little head tilts with biiiiiig eyes when they want you to feel special.

they want you to want them. they want you to choose them. it’s unconscious at this point. survival instinct and genuine longing both in the soup.

this annoys you, kinda. but you can deal with it. it’s your job, after all, this is what got you that payment raise. and oh it’s also your job to having to listen to how loud they always are.

not just yelling your name when they need something, they’re fucking hootin and hollerin around and scream at each other and laugh like fucking animals and wrestle on the floor.

but they also can be cute. okay, there, you admitted it, but it was sweet seeing hyunjin and jeongin lying on the floor together, just kind of cuddling. didn’t these bitches exclusively complain about physical touch? okay fuck cares men are weird. they do this. they need the physical comfort. they just don’t call it that.

(afterwards they pushed each other away and “dude you’re annoying—“ “bro leave me alone—“ “ew—“ “get off me—“)

another time you were talking with chan who was sitting in a spinning chair, han in his lap. he had his arms around chan’s neck, chin on chan’s shoulder, eyes closed.

“you made sure they sent the updated ones, right?” chan’s saying to you about some business bullshit.

you nod. “yes. i double checked this morning. uh, they also confirmed the fitting time. they can do thursday. you’re fine.”

you like how serious chan is now. like yes daddy be that serious while spanking me. “okay. bin won’t be in until the afternoon on friday, can you—“

“yeah, i’ll call them right now.” oh you know your shit.

chan nods, satisfied. like so satisfied. only another blowjob could satisfy him more than this. his hand rubs han’s back. “thanks, y/n.“

horrible little hoes.

and they know they’re horrible. if one of them was a girl, they literally wouldn’t date each other. they know too much of the others, too many sides seen. too much ego. they accept it. they love each other but if they had daughters then they wouldn’t let the others date her. in general they’d sooner kill the other than let them close to any family member of theirs romantically, that’s how much they know of each other and how conscious they are that they’re not ethically good people.

hyunjin’s prick ass(but at least he can pay the bills) is their the pick to keep away from any female in their lives. anyways, he’s better now. like, his general mental health. it’s still pretty shitty, but better. you helped a lot. his balls feel lighter, his shoulders feel looser, because someone finally drained the constant panic and pressure out of his nervous system.

he feels powerful. validated. like he finally got what was “his.” but really he’s just really softening up. he’s starting to see how gentle you treat him, how much you take from him, that actually feels good for him. it’s such a good feeling that you basically accept him this much. hm, he should go find you now too.

bad side of this, is that he’s sensitive as fuck now. everytime he sees you his body reacts, and that’s only natural, that’s the right thing happening here, but still, it’s not always pleasant having his cock twitching and his chest feeling tight and beating.

him and changbin have talked about this, actually. shared their feelings. and they can… relate to each other.

changbin specifically is really in his head, really proud of what he got from you. like he can’t stop thinking about your warm mouth, the way you looked up at him while sucking him, how you treated him.

he wakes up hard in the morning just because you’re in his mind so much nowadays. he has to jerk off in the shower just to function.

men jerking off omfg hottest thing ever. binnie is the hottest thing ever. all eight are the hottest things ever and you know it and you feel so good about your position.

but it’s not just physical, emotionally he feels cared for. you’re a great woman. you’re healing old wounds(he didn’t even know were still bleeding, and still doesn’t know).

he wants your mouth again. he wants your hands. he wants to bury his face between your legs and make you feel even half as good as you made him feel.

…is this a crush we see developing, changbin??

anyways, we’ll get back to the developing crush topic, but we need to talk about jeongin too. jeongin, who wants to be near you all the time.

he wants to show you things. he wants to make you laugh. he wants to you to notice how strong he is.

because this is consistent, kind female attention. fans scream for him but they don’t know him. you do. you let him inside you. you were so accepting and nice. it was such a good sexual experience.

his brain takes you as “someone who wants me for real.” but so decides to forget about the fact that you didn’t like, kiss him at all. asshole. but anyways he’s living in the fantasy that you might actually like him back.

and okay, shit, it’s… nice. really nice. having someone this rich and famous want to spend time with you, touch you, let you touch him. you like this situation too, if you ignore that you can barely go pee without him wanting to watch you do it. (it’s a hilarious fucking picture omfg imagine you just WANTING to pee and this fuckass standing in the stall with you and staring down at you wordlessly. maybe tapping his two hands on his thighs. this fucking dipshit oh how we love him)

then chan… well, chan feels… a lot.

he finds you beautiful.

not just hot, beautiful. makes his chest feel tight, dare i say, makes him lose his breath. he sees worth in you, he begins to. he sees someone who could stand next to him. he wishes he could fuck you without feeling like his heart is trying to climb out of his chest.

he’s not mad or jealous or any other similar negative feeling at jeongin or changbin or hyunjin, after all. it comes off as that at first but it always fades, because he’s just… sad. that gives a negative start to everything, the main in him is sad. sad that he complicated it. sad that he made it heavy. sad that you had to be the mature one and stop him.

he wants you again. bad. he wants you the way jeongin had you, the way the kid told the story made it such a fantasy, and he also wants you the way hyunjin had you because c’mon chan is born for doggystyle.

and also, he wants to hold you after. he wants to be the one you choose when you’re tired.

that’s also a fantasy of his, maybe he could be your stress relief. reverse the situation what you two were in, he could be between your legs and he could take all this stress off your shoulders. doesn’t that sound nice?

it does, to him. like drooling nice. like he actually had to catch the drool slipping out of his mouth once when he was in his head about this particular scenario. it got on his shirt. fuck.

but he’s getting better with time. the tension, having to throw up in his stomach is loosening. he’s starting to realize and accept that you belong to all of them, kinda, and that will change in the future, and that’s okay. that this is your choice. he respects it. he respects you. there we go, from not even remembering the new little assistant’s name, to respect. or maybe a crush, even.

no, not a crush, please. he’s terrified of that.

but he can’t stop it. everytime he sees you he has to smile. every time you smile at him he feels like the best boy out of all of them. fuck, he can only hope you don’t prefer the others over him, like maybe felix. (all of them are afraid that your favorite is felix, that’s just so natural to come for everyone and everything they know, always felix)

he’s falling.

that’s the right word, chan is falling.

for his assistant.

for who you show to them, and for the version of you that only he got glimpses of. the one that helped him with more than just bringing him water. but he knows it’s not emotional for you. and he’s trying to be okay with that. but even if he never gets to have you the way he wants, you’ve already given him more than anyone else ever has.

it only took having his dick sucked twice. he overestimated his ability to stay unattached.

so, after all, all four of them are scared that they’re developing workplace crushes and they know how bad that is. this isn’t school, this isn’t pass a note in class, this is real life with real consequences. contracts. reputations. millions of fans. companies. a crush here isn’t cute. it’s just… danger to them, it could end careers, it could end yours, it could blow up the entire group.

but they can’t stop it.

they have, what? years of suppression? for sure. then also access to a new human connection, and constant stress, attractive and competent and sexually available woman. they’re latching onto you.

and those are just the ones who have fucked you.

the other four that haven’t, the other half of the group, they’re still thinking with their dicks.

okay, so do the other four you’ve already had. all of this is driven by their dicks. hyunjin’s liking towards you is platonic, he still just wants to put it in you again. jeongin? ever more. changbin acts like this because of what his dick received and chan is just difficult mentally. still, they want to dick you down.

anyways. the unfucked four spend their days how the fucked four also do, thinking about how your pussy would feel, how your mouth would look stretched around them, how your ass would jiggle when they fuck you from behind. difference is, one half already got these visuals. that doesn’t hold these men back though.

minho, to start with. he smiles at you nowadays without saying anything, once or twice. he’s nicer, now that you got to know him. but you’re kind of aware that he’s nice because wants to fuck your throat. that he gives the nice to get something.

but that’s okay, the fuck would he want a relationship for now, useless. and he got the alternative that doesn’t nag him on a hourly basis and he doesn’t have to take out on dates and put effort into, just gives him the care without him having to put anything into it. he’s so fine. (only if he knew what relationship awaits him)

han’s best effort on his own pathetic case is just talking to you. or when something’s funny then leaning on you to laugh, or hand on your shoulder and his forehead on that while laughing like it’s a joke. but it’s not a joke. he’s not okay inside. and on top of that he wants to fuck you so badly he can barely think. he wants to bury his face between your thighs and eat you. not just eat you out but eat you. he wants to hear you moan, wants to feel your nails digging into his back. he wants the release he knows you can give him, his assistant.

he needs you. he needs the comfort. he needs to feel wanted.

felix wants to feel what the others felt. he wants to know if you’d moan for him the way you moaned for hyunjin(at least how hyunjin described it, that’s why when felix is in his head about you he sometimes accidentally imagines you moaning in hyunjin’s voice??? and he doesn’t even realize) he just wants to bury his face between your tits and forget the world for ten minutes, c’mon y/n, give him that!

you were extra nice to him one afternoon, just a small thing, let’s say you got him a cold whatever drink without him asking. lix took the can, said “thanks”, then excused himself.

he walked to the bathroom, locked the door, pressed his back to it, and stood there breathing hard, hand on his chest, trying to calm his heart down. he squeezed his eyes together and remembered every second of the interaction. it was nothing. but to him it felt like everything. so that’s how much that little shit affected him.

he stood there for a solid two minutes just trying to breathe while his dick throbbed against his thigh. it was just so inconvenient.

he tried not to jerk off right there. he wanted you so bad in that moment it actually scared him a little. he wanted to push you against the wall, pull your pants down, and bury his face in your pussy until you couldn’t stand. like right there. but he couldn’t. so he just stood there, breathing through it, until his dick calmed down enough to go back out.

oh don’t misunderstand this is not a crush. he’s not in love or anything, he just wants your pussy so bad it’s making him act like this.

but seungmin, doesn’t make an effort to make a move on you. just touching you without a consent but no “no” said is okay to him. he likes just watching you too. acting like he’s not so up for pinning you to the wall and fucking you from behind while covering your mouth so no one would hear.

he just wants your body. wants to use you. wants to take what the others have already had. he’s patient but that’s gonna end once too.

objectification.

you’re letting them objectify you.

you… okay, you kinda like it. not in a “i have no self respect” way, more like… it’s hot. being wanted this badly by eight hot, famous, rich men who could have anyone but keep wanting you. you like being the one they all know. you’re so glad for this job.

and you objectify them back. unintentionally, but you do. especially chan. oh you two have a weird little dynamic, anyways, he’s so.. yes. he’s the man ever. dadaman.

and you catch yourself staring at his hands sometimes, imagining them spreading your ass again. you catch yourself getting horny, turned on just hearing him talk.

he’s hot. he’s so fucking hot it makes you want to rip your two arms off. (without you developing a crush!! so professional)

but this doesn’t mean he’s your favorite, you don’t have a favorite. you like them all the same. and you like their bodies. you like their voices. you like the way they are during sex.

but unlike them, you’re not just objectifying. you’re a woman. you’re not as traumatized as they are. you still have space in your head for empathy. you feel bad for them, really bad sometimes. you see how young they were, you see how they’ve been trained to act through anything, through pain, to perform through exhaustion, to never complain. you see the fear in their eyes when they think about what happens if they’re not perfect. you see how lonely they are, and it affects your easy little heart.

so yeah. you use their bodies and their neediness to feel good and powerful, but you also feel sorry for them. you see the scared little boys underneath the muscles and the acting, you see how much they’ve sacrificed, you see how badly they need someone to just… be soft with them. these men have ruined their lives.

that’s why you let them do this to you.

you’re not innocent, you’re not a victim, you’re a participant, you’re getting something out of this too, money, validation, power, pleasure, satisfaction, and you’re okay with that. you’re more than okay with it.

because you really like the boys, after all. maybe you like them for how traumatized, fucked up in the head they are, but you still do and it is what it is. they’re nice, just damaged.

but lately it’s been a lot of chan. still, no favorites, just it came like this. you’ve been spending big amounts of time with him. it’s a surprise that none of them ended with you choking on his beautiful cock but what’s late isn’t gone.

one night you were in the studio with him, just laptop time. you were about to get up and go home soon, but… not yet.

the others had gone home hours earlier. it was just you and chan, both on your laptops, legs tangled under the small table. now that’s adorable. he was muttering things under his breath, eyebrows knotted, it was so cute. you were fixing the schedule for next week, color coding shit!!

at one point he got up to stretch, arms over his head, shirt riding up, showing that luring v line and the trail of hair you knew led down to his thick cock. he caught you looking. smiled, a little bit. then sat back down. leg went back on yours.

that single interaction held more intimacy, more tension and romance and cheekiness than any form of sex you two ever had.

anyways, you like his company. you really do. he’s maybe the calmest when it’s just the two of you. he’s funny too, in his dry way.

he asks about your day sometimes. tells you shit about the boys. he’s trying.

of course he also likes the way your throat feels. you notice him staring at your mouth sometimes. you see the way his thighs tense, how he swallows when you lean over to point at something on his screen and your shirt gaps a little.

he remembers. he remembers how you looked on your knees. how you sounded gagging on him. how warm and wet and perfect your throat was.

sometimes when you’re both focused on work you’ll notice his breathing change for a second, that’s when he’s thinking about it. then he’ll clear his throat or drink some water and go back to work.

you don’t mind.

you like that tension too.

another night you’re both sitting on a couch in a smaller room, on your laptops. chan is editing something, chewing on that chewable lip a bit. you’re on about some calendar but cookie clicker is open under it.

he reaches for the burger you brought him earlier, unwraps it with one hand, fucking man, and inhales the whole thing in three massive bites. fucking caveman.

you look over. “you good?”

“mm.” he grunts, mouth still full. “stavving. thanks fo brinhing it.”

you hum, going back to your screen. a minute later you ask “can you pass me my charger?”

chan reaches over, unplugs his own charger and hands it to you. it was closer. newer iphone chargers nonetheless so doesn’t really matter. “here.”

“thanks.”

you both go back to typing. ten minutes later he asks you “what time do i need to come in tomorrow?” since something got put to another day.

“ten thirty.”

“fuck. okay.”

silence again. comfortable. you glance at him once. he’s focused, but seems relaxed. you two fit so good together, just please start dating, please. (exaggeration, neither of you are ready for that yet)

he catches you looking. “what?”

“nothing. you have a pen mark on your cheek.”

he rubs at it. “gone?”

“still there.”

he sighs, wipes harder. you go back to your laptop. neither of you says anything else for the next half hour. it’s nice.

you have seen this man naked, by the way.

another time you’re answering emails while chan leans back on the couch, groaning around.

you don’t stare. much.

“my back hurts.” he mutters.

“you did too many reps yesterday?”

“yeah.” he rolls his neck. “can you pass me that pillow behind you?”

you grab it and throw it at his face. he catches it, laughs, aw okay, stuffs it behind his lower back.

“better?”

“better.”

you both go back to work. ten minutes later he reaches over and takes one of your fries from the whatever you ordered.

and when he’s done with that he has the audacity to ask “you got any gum?”

but really he just knows you’ll give them anything anytime.

you pull a pack from your bag and hand him. he takes two, pops them in, then offers the pack back.

“thanks.”

“mhm.”

you sit there in comfortable silence. he chews loudly. you don’t mind.

he likes your company. you like his company too.

you’re getting close.

now. this time it’s the same setting we just lead up to, studio, late as fuck, laptops open.

“pass me the ketchup?” he asks.

you slide the little packet over without looking. he catches it, rips it open with his teeth, and squeezes it onto the last few whatever he asked you to order for him. he paid, of course, not out of being a gentleman, it’s just the company’s rules with employing you.

“mm.” why do men always have to hum when eating? “you talked to hyunjin lately?”

you look up. “a bit. why?”

chan shrugs, not looking at you because he can’t. “heard that you two… you know.”

you lean back. “he asked me that afternoon. said he’d leave the brand meeting early. i told him it was bad timing, but he kept pushing. you know how he gets. i went over. that’s… it.”

he kept pushing. chan doesn’t like that. he’ll talk to hyune later.

anyways, he likes that you tell him this. he likes that you’re honest, that you don’t hide it, that you treat him like he can handle it. it makes him feel trusted. smart.

he nods. “he seemed… lighter after.”

“good. that’s the point.”

another bit of silence.

“you okay with all of it?” he asks.

“yeah. i’m fine.”

he looks at you for a long time, then goes back to his screen. yikes, there goes your chance, chan. but yeah, he’s grateful you talk to him like this. really grateful.

you stand up to grab something from your bag on the table. you rummage for a second, when you turn back around, little notebook in your hand, chan is standing in front of you.

close.

the tension of you two’s arrives back into the room. did it ever leave?

his eyes are fixed on you. so much held back behind them, so much of him.

he’s so pretty. those huge lips, so full, those eyes when he doesn’t have makeup on. how he smells. how low, quiet his voice is when he opens his mouth to talk to you.

“i want to have sex too.”

author’s note: uh btw the end of this series is supposed to be real love w the guys… if u couldn’t tell. so the classic fall in real love bla bla bla, anyways these are really mean characterizations on purpose, does not mean i’m assuming anything of these men or how they act, because i and we do not know these men!! AND if anyone only reads all done boss of my content, i’ll tell u that i do my series w the first part of the titles being the same (my dear y/n series and now the all done) and the last part of them changed!! love y’all thank u for the amount of love i got on the first part of this<3

and it’s such a shame because he used to be gorgeous. genuinely a sexy villain af. now he’s a foot long.

has the same voice he had when he was human, even. suits him.

you adore the little shit. can’t help it. he’s adorable. you even buy him those fuckass colorful tunnels and hide treats in them just to watch him seethe while he hunts them down because “i am not your entertainment, you brainless whore.” you even painted his tiny nails black once while he was napping and he spent three days trying to bite them off while screeching about how you’ve humiliated him for the last time.

and he genuinely, deeply, spiritually despises both you and felix. no joke here lad. if he had thumbs and access to a weapon you’d both be done for.

he misses his human form more than anything, but tbh he deserved death for what he did back when he was human. he genuinely made innocent’s lives hell, killed and tortured, he was like an actual evil man.

fucking karma ig but still not enough.

anyways. felix also hates hyunjin’s guts, just can’t take him seriously anymore. like he’ll flick hyunjin off the kitchen counter when he’s trying to sabotage dinner, or dangle him by the scruff or something. that little cumsock is nothing to him.

felix thinks the whole situation is peak comedy. hyunjin plotting world domination from inside a ferret cage? hilarious. hyunjin trying to chew through felix’s shoelaces as revenge? even better.

felix will tell him shit like “bro you used to be able to destroy buildings, now you’re throwing a tantrum because i won’t let you drink from the toilet. get a grip.”

just again, hyunjin hates both of you with the fire of a thousand suns.

he has never hated anyone more.

he wants you dead(even though you didn’t do shit, he just always hated easily, villain, duh). he wants felix skinned. he wants his old body back and your luxurious penthouse apartment burned to the ground.

he’s full of rage and so tiny.

felix will literally be like “hey.” and hyunjin will go on a five minute rant about how he’s going to end him, destroy everything he loves, claw his eyes out, etc.

and felix just. walks past him. maybe tosses him a treat.

every time you kiss felix in the kitchen hyunjin makes this choked gagging noise from wherever he’s placed(can’t get off countertops by himself), every time felix picks you up and spins you around(you two are genuinely the two in love ever), hyunjin takes the chance to rub his little ferret ass all over felix’s shoes while your man is entertained by you.

he still lets you scratch under his chin. wouldn’t let felix do it tho.

but when felix comes home, he doesn’t even think about hyunjin, literally couldn’t care less, but the little fucker is always up to something when you don’t pay attention(you’re lowk a stay at home wife). so if the ferret is on the counter trying to fuck over anything really, felix usually swipes him off, that’s about all the attention he gives him. or sometimes he kicks him, (and hyunjin never gets hurt at all???), and hyunjin goes tumbling across the rug.

“whoops.” felix says every single time. “slipped.”

you fucking love hyunjin though. especially on the long days when felix is out doing hero shit and it’s just you and hyunjin.

bitch the building has a private everything, there’s also an elevator in the apartment itself, so it’s a penthouse or what, rooftop pool, a kitchen bigger than most apartments, allat. so most days it’s you in oversized shirts and shorts and socks, sipping coffee, while this tiny white ferret runs around.

the sound of his little nails clicking and skittering everywhere makes you want to squeal.

you’ll be folding laundry on the couch and listen to him run past, doing that weird sideways run ferrets do, muttering curses under his breath the whole time like “fuck you and your hero dick” or some variation, lil nails on the floor.

clickclickclickclickclick

thud.

he ran into a table leg.

sometimes you’ll leave treats in weird places just to watch him hunt them down while pretending he’s above it. he always is above it, right up until his little nose starts twitching and he launches himself into a tunnel while he’s calculating exactly how many bites it would take to sever your jugular.

felix’s way of dealing with him is way less patient. he hates the guy.

take the time you three are in the living room and hyunjin starts his usual monologue about how he’s going to reclaim his empire once he’s human again, felix is scrolling on his phone, isn’t in the mood to look up at hyune, says “keep squeaking like that and i’ll neuter you myself. snip snip, little balls gone.”

hyunjin freezes midsentence, fur puffing up, and starts cursing in the most creative ways you’ve ever heard. stuff about felix’s mother, felix’s dick, felix’s entire bloodline being cursed with micropenises.

felix just smiles and moves his fingers like scissors. “snip snip.”

or you’re trying to watch a movie, hyunjin won’t stop yapping from the coffee table about how felix is a talentless whore and felix just wants to watch his movie so he tells hyunjin to “shut the fuck up or i’m using you as a condom. you’re about the right size and way tighter than you deserve.”

you giggle.

hyunjin lets out the most horrified high pitched scream you’ve ever heard and throws himself off the table in pure panic, only to get caught mid air by felix’s hand and thrown onto the big armchair. just to set him back a little.

hyunjin will respond by trying to claw felix’s face off for the rest of the night while screaming about revenge and how he’ll make felix eat his own testicles. felix just puts hyunjin in the empty fish tank “for timeout” and hyunjin spends the whole time throwing himself against the glass.

like there is no respect left in that man’s body when it comes to hyunjin.

and just again, that’s well deserved. hyunjin used to be a horrible person, no matter how beautiful he was.

or like you and felix will be on the couch, tangled up, him kissing down your neck, hands wandering, everything hot and in love and quiet and finally normal for like two seconds, and then from across the room from hyunjin’s cage: “this is disgusting.”

you both ignore him.

“you two are gross.”

nothing.

“i hope you choke.”

felix mumbles a “you’re about to have a worse day.” into your skin, and instead of, you know, taking you somewhere else like a normal human being? felix gets up, walks over to hyunjin’s cage, opens the cage. (which has multiple levels and furniture and even a hammock)

hyunjin is mid talk like “oh finally, you’ve come to your senses—”

gets grabbed.

felix walks away with him and drops him into the toilet. lid down.

comes back to you. sits down, pulls you back in. “sorry about that.”

you continue.

and there was that time in the kitchen. you’re up on the counter, felix stands between your legs, things getting heated, and hyunjin is loose, which is mistake number one.

you just hear the clickclickclick getting faster. closer.

felix doesn’t even let him speak, just picks him up, opens a cabinet, puts him inside, closes it.

“he’s gonna knock everything over.” you whisper.

“good. maybe he’ll season himself.”

or the absolute fucking wooooorst is when you’re tangled up with felix in bed. hyunjin is in his cage in the living room. door closed. locked. secure. felix is kissing you, slow, hot.

and then, right next to your ear: “…you forgot the top latch.”

you SCREAM.

felix flinches.

hyunjin is on the nightstand.

felix stares at him for a long second. then reaches over, grabs a pillow, and drops it on top of him. covers the little guy with it then puts the heavy ass lamp on the pillow too.

the pillow starts moving. hyunjin is fighting for his life under there.

“continue.” felix says to you, already pulling your face back to his.

muffled from under the pillow: “this is suffocating—”

felix presses the pillow down slightly. “quiet.”

and the shit you witness??? one time you’re just in the bathroom, brushing your teeth, door wide open and you hear felix in the hall go “don’t start.”

hyunjin immediately starts.

not even five seconds later, hyunjin flies past the doorway.

you freeze with the toothbrush in your mouth.

thunk. he hits the wall. then from the floor, in that little soft voice: “…i will kill you.”

another time felix got fed up with hyunjin’s nonstop squeaking rant about “the injustice of it all” and just vacuumed him up. you walked in to find felix calmly pushing the vacuum around while muffled cursing came from inside the vacuum.

“he’s fine.” felix said, patting the vacuum like it was a good dog.

you’ll be cooking dinner and hear felix in the other room threatening to turn hyunjin into a living butt plug if he doesn’t stop plotting, while hyunjin is screeching back that he hopes felix’s dick falls off.

the only thing that actually gets a reaction out of felix is when that white sock of hatred throws himself and clamps those tiny razor teeth right onto felix’s junk through his sweatpants. felix always yelps, doubles over, and spends the next five minutes swearing while hyunjin hangs there.

“you’re obsessed with my balls. it’s getting weird.” felix says, holding hyunjin up eye level after he finally got the lil mf off.

but then oh. you’re sitting on the couch scrolling on your phone when hyunjin comes out from under the dining table, nails clicking. because he felt like it, he jumps onto your lap, starts circling before settling down on your thighs. his tiny body curls up, SO cute that fluffy white tail twitching once before going still.

“i hate you, bitch.” he tells you. “i hate every inch of your stupid fucking face and your hero fucked cunt. when i get my real body back i’m gonna piss in your mouth while you sleep and laugh as you drown in it.”

you hum and stroke down his back with your nails.

he keeps going, muttering shit under his breath, how he’s gonna skull fuck your corpse, how he’ll turn your intestines into ropes he’ll tie prostitutes up with, but the whole time he’s burrowing his tiny ass body deeper into your lap. you feel too warm.

you scratch behind his ears and he lets out this little trill before catching himself and hissing a fuck you out one more time.

another afternoon you see him in the kitchen trying to drag himself up onto the counter where felix left half a bag of gummies. hyunjin’s got his front paws on the edge, back legs fucking around, grunting with effort as he tries to yank the bag down.

his evil little plan is that he’ll eat so much gummies that he’ll throw up. convince you he needs the vet, then escape from there.

you watch him as he eats gummy after gummy, cheeks puffed out, making the most determined evil faces while chewing. a little ferret btw.

after about fifteen of them he starts making these weird little gagging noises, body convulsing, looking like he’s about to hurl, but nothing comes up. he tries again, but his ferret stomach refuses to cooperate.

he still tries every few days, sniffing out chocolate, looking through the trash for things, once attempting to chug an entire energy drink he knocked over, but his little system never lets him actually get sick. he just ends up bloated and pissed off.

then there are the times when he’s being extra loud and evil, screeching from the top of the bookshelf or from inside one of his tunnels about how he’s going to castrate felix with a spoon and wear his balls as a necklace.

those days felix usually sighs, reaches up, and snatches hyunjin by the scruff. hyunjin immediately starts thrashing, tiny legs kicking, teeth snapping at the air. “don’t you fucking dare, you whore! put me down! i’ll bite your fucking eyes out!”

hyunjin hates being picked up more than anything. it makes him feel small and helpless and he loses his tiny fucking mind every single time. he’s more than this! he’s not a little pet, he’s the fucking hwang hyunjin and he’s powerful!

“yeah yeah sure whatever.” felix opens the cage and throws hyunjin inside. sometimes gives him a little extra flick on the ass on the way in, or you’ll lean down and blow a kiss while saying “night night, angry baby.”

hyunjin always throws himself against the bars immediately, rattling them, screeching “i’ll murder you both in your sleep, i’ll shit in your lungs, i’ll turn your assholes inside out and wear them as hats!”

the cage door clicks shut and he keeps going, promising graphic torture that involves your nipples, felix’s prostate, and several household appliances.

hyunjin is genuinely evil to his core. he wants you both suffering. he dreams of blood and fire and your screams every night. but he’s also stuck as this tiny sweetpea brutally cute little ferret who can’t do a damn thing when you two decide it’s cage time.

and god, you and felix are married. like so married. genuinely deeply in love.

which means, you fuck hard.

loud, messy kinda sex that leaves the sheets falling off the bed/ripped/soaked and the headboard banging against the wall. you two fucking go at it.

hyunjin hates every single second of it because ferrets have good hearing(he already had good hearing in his human body, now this body isn’t any better) he catches lots of moans, slap of skin, wet sounds even when he’s locked in the cage on the other side of the place.

then, he really does want to kill you two.

he’ll be curled up in his stupid luxury cage trying to plot world domination in his tiny evil brain when suddenly he hears you gasping felix’s name, that thud of the bedframe, the wet squelch of felix’s cock sliding in and out of your soaked cunt while he moans shit in your ear.

hyunjin starts screeching immediately, but oh, why would you two hear him?

he already hated other people having sex near him when he was a human. well, he still is one, just with another body. but still. ew. like shut up.

back in your room, felix fucks you harder, making the sounds even louder. missionary with your legs over his shoulders so he can pound deep, wet slap of balls on your ass. doggy while he grips your hips and rails you so hard the whole bed shakes, groaning around when you start squirting on him. reverse cowgirl so you’re bouncing on his cock, tits jiggling, ass clapping down loud enough that hyunjin starts banging his little head against the cage’s bars.

then felix flips you onto your back and hooks your ankles behind his neck, folding you in half with that brutal stamina of his so he can make his pretty cock poke your cervix, groaning “take it all, baby, gonna fill this greedy pussy till it’s dripping down your thighs.”

when you ride felix’s face and he eats you out like a fucking animal, tongue fucking into you while you grind on his mouth, the obscene moans felix, FELIX(so not even you only but he moans too, this man is brutal) lets out travel straight to hyunjin’s sensitive ears and he starts throwing himself on the cage bars screaming around.

and god forbid you two go for anal. the second felix works his cock into your tight ass, since that takes effort and the harder moans that come with it, those are louder.

hyunjin actually wants to die by the time felix groans when he pumps you full. luckily the walls are thick so hyunjin at least can’t hear the wet drip when felix pulls out and his load starts leaking from your used cunt or ass, or the lazy slap of his cock on your clit as he smears it around, but when you or felix start screaming or felix starts talking sum “take my cock, baby” god, hyunjin actually tried to hang himself once with the hammock in the cage.

and the two are constantly inventing new ways to fuck with each other.

felix will dangle hyunjin by the tail over the balcony just to watch him flail and scream death threats. also once tied a tiny bell around hyunjin’s neck while he was sleeping and hyunjin spent three days trying to chew it off, jingling everywhere. hyunjin got back at him by gnawing through the charger of felix’s favorite gaming headset. felix responded by putting hyunjin in the blender (lid off, of course) and spinning it on low just to watch the ferret tumble while hyunjin screamed “i’ll shove that blender up your ass and turn your prostate into smoothie!”

hyunjin once managed to knock an entire bottle of lube into felix’s lap as revenge for being kicked across the room. felix spent the next hour fucking you with extra slippery enthusiasm while loudly announcing “THANKS DUDE.” hyunjin nearly had an aneurysm listening to it.

they never stop. felix will flick hyunjin’s nose with a finger when he walks by, hard enough to make the ferret throw his little head around. hyunjin will wait until felix is asleep(and you’re not home!!) and then hump his forehead aggressively. felix once threatened to sew hyunjin’s mouth shut with fishing line if he didn’t stop squeaking around. hyunjin chewed holes in felix’s favorite armchair for that.

it’s important to take in notice that this is not an animal. this is an animal’s body but a man inside of it, an evil human being. has the iq and understanding of a normal human. none of the two boys do this shit with the acknowledgment of like this is animal cruelty or whatever. both are very aware that hyunjin is a human and it’s not an animal y’all are doing this to. felix doesn’t see hyunjin as a ferret at all, it’s just hyunjin’s looks, but when has felix cared about looks.

and listen, you know hyunjin hates you with every microscopic fiber of his evil little soul. every single day he mutters about how he’s gonna skull fuck your corpse and use your eye sockets as cum dumpsters once he’s back in his gorgeous villain body.

but.

he hates felix more. way more. like, nuclear levels more. the kind of hatred that makes his tiny ferret heart actually hurt when he looks at the hero. felix is a dick to him. felix ruined his existence.

so, felix first, you a distant but still very hated second.

sometimes felix is on one of his asshole days, chasing hyunjin around the penthouse with a rolled up magazine or something. hyunjin will run straight to you, tiny claws clicking, and worm his way up the inside of your sweatpants. crawls all the way up your thigh, until he’s tucked right between the warm crease where your leg meets your body. no, he does not care about being that close to something that intimate of yours, this man couldn’t care less. you’d assume he was asexual or something if he wasn’t always bragging about how he used to fuck and who when he was in his human body. so you just know he absolutely doesn’t see you that way. anyways, he stays there on you perfectly still, breathing fast on your skin.

felix comes in, magazine in hand. “babe, you seen the ferret? little shit tried to piss in my coffee again.”

you blink up at him with those big angel eyes. “no. haven’t seen him. maybe he’s hiding in the vents again.”

felix walks away muttering. the second he’s out of earshot, hyunjin lets out the world’s tiniest, shakiest sigh of relief on your thigh.

those are the only times he ever feels anything close to gratitude.

other times it’s just the two of you home.

felix is out doing hero shit or whatever, and you’re in the kitchen cooking something in your big wide pan on the stove.

hyunjin keeps trying to climb the side of it, tiny paws slipping on the metal, determined to hurl himself into the sizzling oil.

“baby, no.” you sigh, grabbing him mid climb before he burns his murder mittens off.

he starts thrashing. “unhand me! i’ll gut you!”

you drop him into the huge back pocket of your oversized sweatpants. he slides right in, ass first, until he’s all in there. he wriggles and curses, calling you every name in the villain dictionary, but the pocket is warm, soft from being on your body all day, and smells like you and laundry detergent. so within ten minutes the angry squeaking turns into grumpy muttering, then into sleepy little chitters, and eventually he just passes the fuck out. curled up in that biiiig back pocket, nose tucked under his tail, while you walk around the penthouse doing chores, cooking, texting, whatever.

you carry him like that for hours sometimes. he sleeps through you folding laundry, through you watching tv while you vacuum. every once in a while he’ll twitch in his sleep and mumble something like “fuck… felix… balls… blender…” but mostly he’s dead to the world, trusting your body heat and the gentle sway of your walking. trusting you to keep him safe in there.

when he finally wakes up he always acts like it never happened, immediately launching into a fresh rant about how he’s going to rip your uterus out with his teeth and knit a scarf with it.

he lets himself get soft with you from time to time.

but only with you.

because felix is an asshole.

because felix sometimes drops hyunjin into the sink and turn the faucet on full blast, holding him under the cold spray while hyunjjn screams and paddles. because felix is a disgusting person.

another time hyunjin manages to climb the curtains and drop directly onto felix’s head while he’s napping on the couch. he latches onto felix’s ear with his teeth and starts yanking. felix wakes up yelling, grabs hyunjin by the tail, and swings him around before throwing him across the room.

“nice try, ear rapist. next time i’m using you as a fleshlight. bet your tight little ferret asshole would stretch real nice.”

hyunjin comes running back, tiny body puffed up. “i’ll fuck your eye socket, man, i’ll—“

felix traps him under an upside down glass bowl on the coffee table for three hours, tapping on the glass every few minutes.

hyunjin throws himself against the glass with so much power that the bowl rattles, screeching promises of disembowelment and how he’s gonna wear felix’s intestines as a scarf.

you’ve seen felix threaten to microwave hyunjin for thirty seconds “just to warm him up” only for hyunjin to try to piss in felix’s protein powder for that. felix once tied a tiny leash around hyunjin’s middle and walked him around the penthouse while hyunjin screamed bloody murder and tried to bite his ankles to the bone.

they’re constantly inventing new ways to make each other miserable.

and felix is only a dick to hyunjin. reasonably, of course. to the rest of the world, he’s an angel. to you, he’s an angel.

that’s because he has never been in love like this before, ever.

you and felix are disgustingly, unbelievably, unswallowably in love. even after years together. you two are fucking unbearable. constantly touching. his hand on you anywhere you walk, your fingers tangled in his hair when you kiss, makeout sessions on the couch that turn into giggles because he keeps snorting into the kiss, and let’s not even talk about the nasty sex you two manage to pull off. money makes it all easier, ofc. private jets when you feel like it, designer anything and their cousins, the fact that your fucking penthouse has a rooftop pool. rooftop pool. r o o f t o p p o o l. felix spoils you rotten.

take this, it’s the afternoon. you’re outside on that rooftop, fuck, the image itself is a mental jerk off, sun on yours skin, the pool water sparkling, and felix is at the fancy built in grill flipping steaks or burgers or whatever rich people meat he decided on today, shirtless. this fucking dipshit of a man.

you’re stretched out on a lounger in a tiny bikini, sunglasses, sipping smth expensive and fruity. hyunjin is on a stupid little leash clipped to a sparkly pink collar you bought to piss his tiny ass off. he’s sitting next to your chair looking like he wants to commit mass murder with his teeth.

you hold out a piece of grilled meat between your fingers, still warm, to him. “c’mon, angry baby, open up. it’s good for you.“

hyunjin glares up at you with those tiny black eyes full of pure evil. “i would rather chew my own intestines out and strangle you with them than eat from your whore fingers.”

but his little stomach betrays him because he’s a ferret and food is food. he jumps forward, tiny sharp teeth grazing your skin as he takes the piece, chewing aggressively while muttering around it “fuck you… fuck this… fuck your perfect little life…”

you keep feeding him, stroking his head with one finger between pieces, and he lets you because what the fuck else is he gonna do, starve on principle? he hates it so much his whole body vibrates with rage.

meanwhile felix keeps glancing over from the grill with that biiig sunny grin. “looking good over there, babe. he eating good?”

you blow him a kiss and he pretends to catch it and slap it on his ass. hyunjin gags.

inside the penthouse it’s the same story everywhere hyunjin looks.

felix will come home from hero shit, scoop you up and spin you around while you laugh into his mouth. you’ll cook together in the (massive) kitchen, him sneaking up behind you to kiss your shoulder while you stir something, whispering shi like “can’t wait to bend you over this counter” or him reading on the couch with your head in his lap, playing with your hair. or you bringing him coffee exactly how he likes it and getting rewarded with that soft “thank you, baby” and a kiss on the forehead.

the place reeks of love.

hyunjin hates living in it.

back when he was human, tall and beautiful and terrifying, he spent years making everyone else’s lives hell because his own was a fucking void. no one loved him.

now he’s stuck in this little prison watching two idiots be genuinely good to each other every single day.

he hates it. he wants to vomit but just again he never fucking can.

it’s everything he never had and never let himself want, and it hurts, burns worse than any kick or threat from felix.

if you two will ever have kids then they’ll have the perfect life. two loving parents, money, and growing up with the knowledge that they’re wanted.

but instead of kids, right now it’s hyunjin who gets your baby treatment.

you keep buying him tiny sweaters, for an example. he hates them with a passion that could power cities. you’ll corner him after a bath (another thing he despises but secretly loves because warm water), wrap him in a towel and then wrestle one of the sweaters over his squirming body while he screeches “get this hideous shit off me you sadistic bitch! i am not your dress up doll! i used to command armies and now i look gay!”

he’s so cute you could die.

he’ll sulk in the corner wearing the sweater because he can’t get it off, muttering “when i’m human again i’m burning every single one of these in a pile made from your skin.”

oh, yeah, baths.

you love giving him baths.

you fill the big marble sink in the master bathroom with warm water, a tiny drop of fancy unscented baby shampoo and get a soft washcloth. oh you the parent ever. you strip down to just a tank top and panties so you don’t get soaked, then gently scoop the ferret out of whatever hiding spot he’s chosen that day. he immediately starts hissing and thrashing like you’re lowering him into acid.

you coo at him, lowering his tiny body into the warm water.

the second the heat gets to his skin he goes stiff, then slowly relaxes. little eyes almost close as you cup water over his back, letting it run through his fur. so gentle. you massage the shampoo in with your fingertips, scratching behind his ears, under his chin, along the little dip of his spine where he can’t reach. (much more gentle than felix would be. when it was felix’s turn to bathe the ferret for the first time he started it with throwing hyunjin into the bathtub from the other side of the bathroom, then yelled “trickshot!” first and last time you let him on bath duty. it’s always your job now.)

“there you go, baby. doesn’t that feel nice? all clean and warm. you’re such a good boy even when you’re plotting my gruesome death.”

he stays almost comfortable for a solid ten minutes, floating there, letting out these tiny happy noises.

that’s usually when felix wanders in, fresh from whatever hero bullshit or workout he was doing, shirtless and just having that rich aura around himself.

you two are actually the perfect match omfg.

he comes up behind you, wraps his arms around your waist, and starts pressing slow kisses along the side of your neck while you’re still holding hyunjin in the sink. you melt back into him, sighing happily.

felix glances down at the ferret and can’t resist. he reaches one finger out and pokes hyunjin right in the middle of his wet forehead, pushing his head under the water before letting him pop back up sputtering.

hyunjin goes crazy. water flies everywhere as he thrashes, screeching at the top of his lungs. “get your fucking hero hands away from me you ball sucking traitor! i’ll bite your finger off and shove it up your own ass!”

felix chuckles, so deep, so hot, still on your neck, one hand sliding down to squeeze your ass while the other keeps lightly poking at hyunjn’s side, making the ferret spin in the water.

you’re laughing, it’s beautiful, also tilting your head to give felix better access. “felix, stop tormenting him. he was being good.”

“he’s never good.” felix murmurs, sucking a light mark on you. “deserves every poke he gets.”

hyunjin is foaming at the mouth by then, half drowned and fully enraged, screaming about how he’s going to castrate felix with dental floss and use his balls as bath bombs.

oh he’s your baby. (mentally a 26 year old man who wants you dead)

he hates you both. hates the love dripping from every surface. hates how safe your stupid empathy makes him feel when felix is being a dick. hates the way he keeps crawling into your pants to hide, keeps falling asleep in your back pocket the baby, keeps eating from your hand even while cursing your entire bloodline.

sometimes chan comes over, felix’s old partner from way back. you like the guy a lot. always brings expensive shit when he visits.

hyunjin and chan have history though. some deep shit, but chan has a longing for justice so hard that he forgot all about it the second hyunjin started killing innocent people.

and he enjoys seeing his old buddy like this.

the first time he saw hyunjin after the transformation he laughed so hard he cried and laid down on the floor. ever since then he makes it his mission to torment the little shit every chance he gets.

so when hyunjin jumps at chan for bullying him and bites the tip of his finger, chan just starts spinning hyunjin around in circles. hyunjin js screeching at the top of his lungs the whole time while chan talks about sum “you’re much cuter this way”

hyunjin finally lets go and goes flying across the room, slamming into the wall with an outraged squeak. then immediately starts ranting about how he’s going to shove chan’s entire hand up felix’s ass and then light them both on fire.

chan just sucks the tiny bite mark on his finger. “still got that fight in you, huh? good. makes it more fun when i do this—” (typical shi chan would say, tf does be think he is. love him this way tho.) and then he flicks hyunjin’s tail hard enough to make the ferret spin in place from confusion.

hyunjin hates chan almost as much as he hates felix.

you, still give him all the love anyway.

after chan leaves you scoop the fucking fuming ferret up, press kisses to his little head, and rock him. you keep loving him even when the whole world (and especially felix and chan) keeps reminding him how small and useless he is now.

and deep down, he appreciates this. but even he doesn’t know that.

just again, felix loves you so fucking much. he’ll do anything to give you even five minutes of peace, including babysitting the tiny white ball of pure concentrated evil. his arch nemesis btw.

sometimes he picks hyunjin up, ignores the screaming and biting, and carries him off so you can take a bath, read, or just sit in silence for a while.

that’s how hyunjin ends up put down on the bathroom counter one random evening, while felix is showering. like he’s in there under the massive rainfall head(still you two are rich rich), water going down that unbelievably fucking perfect body while soaping up.

“enjoying the show, boy?” felix calls out as he rinses shampoo from his hair. “must be rough watching a real man wash his balls while you’ve got nothing but… that. pfftt.”

hyunjin’s entire body puffs up. “fuck you, you whore. hope the soap gets in your eyes and blinds you so i can finally gnaw your cock off while you scream. i used to have women on their knees for me and now i’m stuck staring at your flat hero ass. it’s ugly, by the way. ugly.”

felix laughs at him, turns around, presses his bare ass on the glass right in hyunjin’s face, wiggling it like the asshole he is. “kiss it better, short king. maybe if you’re good i’ll let you lick the water off later.”

hyunjin launches himself at the glass, falls the fuck down on the tile, keeps hitting the glass with his tiny nails and teeth while he shrieks every curse in existence.

felix finishes his shower whistling, dries off slow just to drag it out and fuck with hyunjin, then picks hyunjin up by the scruff and walks out, drops him in his cage.

that same night hyunjin decides on revenge. while you and felix are already tangled up in bed, he sneaks into the kitchen, finds the big box of cereal, climbs inside, and starts eating.

then he realizes he’s sunk too deep. the box is tall, the cereal is slippery, and his little legs can’t get anything to push himself on.

he’s stuck.

meanwhile in the bedroom you’re cuddled up to felix’s chest, one leg thrown over him, hand slowly stroking his cock while he groans(like specifically groans) into your mouth. slow, sweet handy under the sheets, his fingers buried in your hair as he kisses you lightly.

“fuck baby, just like that… love you so much.” he whispers into the kisses, hips gently going up into your fist.

hyunjin starts screeching at the top of his lungs. but you and felix are way too all up in each other to notice.

morning. you wake up first, walk into the kitchen in felix’s shirt. there’s cereal all over the floor and a suspicious white fluffy ass sticking out of the box.

you reach in, gently pull hyunjin free. he’s covered in cereal, fur sticky from the sugar, looking horrible.

“oh my god, baby, what did you do to yourself?” you coo, brushing cereal out of his fur.

“that fucking hero left the box open on purpose! this is attempted murder! i demand blood! i demand—”

you scoop him up to your chest and start cuddling him to death, pressing kisses all over his sticky little head, nuzzling his belly, rocking him like a baby while he thrashes around. why are you two fucking hilarious. “shhh, you’re okay. i’ve got you. such a brave boy trying to take on the cereal box all by himself.”

he keeps cursing between kisses to his head and belly, calling you every filthy name he can think of, but his body slowly goes limp, tiny heart rate calming as you carry him back to bed and tuck him between you and felix for morning cuddles.

felix cracks one eye open, sees the sugar covered ferret, snorts. “looks like someone had a rough night. good.”

hyunjin glares at him but doesn’t try to bite because your arms are warm and your love is relentless and he’s too exhausted to fight it right now.

and shit like this happens all the time. felix will “borrow” hyunjin for an hour so you can take a long bath in peace, only for you to come out and find the two of them in the living room, felix playing video games while hyunjin is duct taped to the coffee table because he tried to chew through smething. when asked about it, felix shrugs and says “he started it” while you peel the tape off and spend the next thirty minutes kissing hyunjin’s head and telling him he’s still the scariest villain you know.

oh, felix doesn’t mind the love you give hyunjin, by the way. he knows he’s irreplaceable, there’s not one drop of insecurity in this man’s dickhead body. no reason to feel any bad.

or felix takes hyunjin to the gym with him (in a carrier) so you can sleep in, and hyunjin spends the whole time screaming.

one morning felix “accidentally” locks hyunjin inside the fridge for twenty minutes while he makes you breakfast in bed. when you get hyunjin he’s ice cold and stiff, immediately trying to burrow into your warm tits for warmth(not because tits, just again, hyunjin doesn’t see you like that at all, it’s because he knows women are warm there) while calling felix… i don’t think i can write this down. felix laughs at him and feeds you strawberries.

god, they hate each other so much but are literally made to be enemies.

like that one evening you’re on the couch making out with felix, slow and sweet and so young married, his tongue sliding on yours while his hand cups the back of your neck. sighs and little moans, whatnot. all while, mind you, felix has his other arm stretched straight out to the side, and at the end of that arm is hyunjin dangling by his harness from felix’s fist, legs kicking wildly, body twisting and thrashing.

“you fucking—sloppy—kissing—cocksucker!” hyunjin squeaks as he spins in circles.

felix hums on your lips, smiling into it, turns his wrist so hyunjin does a full 360. “not now, short king, daddy’s busy.”

the constant short kings thrown at hyunjin are a hundred times funnier if you consider that he used to be taller than felix.

eventually he gets bored and drops hyunjin onto the coffee table where the ferret immediately tries to jump at felix’s crotch, only to get gently kicked back by felix’s foot.

or he’ll set the ferret on top of the fridge and walk away while hyunjin screams from eight feet up, tiny legs dangling over the edge.

but felix interrupt his villain torture sessions just to pull you into his lap and kiss you stupid, whispering “love you more than anything, baby” into your mouth while hyunjin is dangling from his other hand losing his mind. he wants to throw hyunjin into the wall but suddenly that urge is nothing the second he sees you. his perfect beautiful wife.

he does the hyunjin babysitting shit because he wants you happy and relaxed, even if it means enduring an hour of death threats and attempted ball biting.

hyunjin is… hyunjin is more complicated.

he hates you. genuinely. with a burning, foaming, ball aching passion. he like calls you “felix’s personal cum rag” or “the bitch whose tits i’m gonna use as trampolines when i’m big again.” he plots your death in vivid detail every single night.

but underneath all that anger there’s this thing only you ever gave him.

he doesn’t like you. but he craves the way you love him anyway.

he craves the baths where you massage his tiny body and call him baby even while he’s cursing you out. he craves the way you hand feed him and listen to the whole rants about his old villain glory days. he craves crawling up inside your sweatpants to hide from felix and the way you lie for him. he craves waking up in your giant back pocket after falling asleep in there. he craves the morning cuddles. he craves when you smother him in kisses instead of scolding him.

he doesn’t like you. he refuses to like you.

but fuck if he isn’t starting to need you.

platonically, of course, let’s make that clear.

he loves felix’s love for you too, because watching felix be so purely in love with you makes the hero look human and weak and that makes hyunjin feel better about himself. makes screaming “shut your whore mouth before i turn it into a second asshole” at felix better.

and you always include the little fucker. some nights before you crawl into bed and melt into your beautiful husband, you open hyunjin’s fancy cage, scoop the fuckass ferret out, and press him to your chest. so he’s tucked between your tits, tiny body warm on your skin, his little heartbeat beating with yours. “this changes nothing you sentimental cunt. i still plan to rip your nipples off with my teeth and use them as decorations on my future throne.”

you hum softly, one arm cradling him close while your other hand slides down to squeeze felix’s ass under the sheets. felix grins on your neck.

hyunjin keeps muttering disgusting things against your collarbone, but he stops moving around. his tiny claws flex once, twice, then relax.

he’s never had this in his human life. not once. no one ever held him. no one ever gave him warmth. so even while he’s seething, the feeling of being pressed to soft skin and heartbeat makes something actually addictive develop in his walnut brain.

he hates how good it feels. he hates it so much he almost wants to cry, but instead he just hisses “i’ll skull fuck your future children” and comes closer.

during the day when felix is out doing hero shit, you walk around the penthouse with hyunjin held to your chest like a baby. just a baby. one hand under his butt, the other supporting his back, or gently bouncing him with one full arm while you do chores or scroll on your phone.

the sway gets to him every single time, how rhythmic it is. nobody can resist that. after a few minutes his pretty little eyes get heavy. and then, oh my god, he starts sucking on his own tiny ferret fingers, making these little suckling noises while his tail twitches.

it feels so good. the warmth, the gentleness, the bounce, the way you talk to him. he’s irritated as fuck but he never tries to climb down.

one afternoon felix is in the shower and you’ve got hyunjin in the big marble tub for his bath. y’know, warm water, a couple of those floating bath toys he pretends to hate, and you’re sitting on the edge, watching him paddle around. your little swimmer.

he’s actually lowkey enjoying the swimming, zooming from one end to the other, when felix steps out of the shower completely butt fucking naked, water dripping down his perfect body. hyunjin looks up at him.

“ha. mine used to be bigger, micropenis. you could try casting a spell on that too. or turn me back to human so i can make you suck it.”

felix flips hyunjin off, walks over still dripping wet, leans down, and presses a sweet kiss to the top of your head. “love you, baby. keep spoiling the evil rat.” then he grabs a towel, wraps it around his waist, and leaves you to watch hyunjin continue his angry laps around the tub.

it’s also a huge influence on hyunjin’s never loved brain that you and felix are so casual with intimacy, with being naked around each other, naked also means vulnerable, and literally why would anyone be vulnerable from their free will??? hyunjin never understood that. but now, he begins to. because he sees love in this household.

you even made him one of those sensory things like a big box filled with dry macaroni. ferrets are supposed to love the crunchy texture and the rattling sound, you saw.

you set it on the floor one evening and drop hyunjin inside. he starts thrashing around, macaroni flying everywhere.

“what the fuck is this? i’ll shove every piece of this pasta up your cunt and make you rattle when you walk!”

but ten minutes later when you check on him he’s deep in the macaroni, making little content noises, asleep. tired himself out, the baby(is an evil man). knocked the fuck out.

that night felix actually lets him sleep in the bed with you two. hyunjin ends up between your bodies, curled up, tiny head under your chin(specifically yours, he hates both you and felix but you’re his favorite). felix mutters “if he bites my dick in his sleep i’m turning him into a scarf” but he leaves him there.

hyunjin wakes up the next morning pressed between two warm humans and he’s never been more pissed off. he’s never felt more… something. he starts plotting how to poison the macaroni box while you two are still asleep and fuck’s sake why are you two so comforting like this.

and also, hyunjin has been begging for cigarettes for literal months. ever since he got turned into a ferret he’s been screeching about needing nicotine, even though the addiction should have stayed in his human body.

felix finally gives in one night. the two of them are out on the balcony, felix in pants only, hyunjin on the little glass table next to him.

felix lights up a cigarette from the pack he bought just for the ferret, takes a drag, then holds it down so the end is near hyunjin’s tiny mouth.

hyunjin’s leans in, takes the world’s smallest puff, fucking adorable, and immediately starts coughing his lungs out, whole body convulsing, eyes watering.

felix laughs at him and holds it there, letting hyunjin try again.

it’s brutally sweet, if you think about it.

you shout from inside the penthouse that dinner’s ready. felix calls back “coming babe!” stubs the cigarette out on the railing, and kicks hyunjin back inside.

hyunjin goes flying across the threshold, tumbling into the living room. “i wasn’t finished you heartless fuck! i’ll rip your throat out and smoke your arteries!” he’s so mad he’s literally vibrating.

but the truth is felix did it for him. bought the pack. took him outside. held the cigarette to his little mouth. gave him a tiny piece of the old villain life he misses so much.

hyunjin has never been more pissed off in his entire miserable ferret existence.

he’s also never been more loved.

he still hates both of you with every fiber of his tiny evil being, but late at night when he’s pressed between your bodies, one paw on felix’s arm and his face buried in your skin, sucking on his own tiny fingers while the gentle rise and fall of your breathing soothes the empty places he used to fill with cruelty… he feels something else than irritation.

he has zero tiny idea whether to scream or curl up tighter.

so he does both. every single day.

author’s note: oh this is going to flop, i don’t think there’s a big audience for content like this. but we’ll see. anyways part two of all done boss is coming!! another ot8 fic in the works then part two of serial killer han<3 then i’m thinking maybe dear yn next because i have so much shit planned for that part. or maybe minho’s solo killer fic??

and with the way he keeps it in, it just builds. and builds. and builds. until suddenly he’s three drinks in at noon, sitting somewhere he doesn’t even remember choosing, staring at his phone because you’re not answering fast enough.

not even ignoring him. just… busy. with someone else.

oh, so you’re with them. cool. great.

and then he orders another drink.

because obviously that’s the solution.

and we’re talking about a noon here but it’s already on in the mornings. hyunjin wakes up already pissed off at his fucking chungus life. with a headache, most time.

his hands don’t know what to do anymore. before you, they knew exactly what they were for. he was born to end lives. now… now he just holds shit when not stabbing with it. he always looks so off nowadays. but always plays with something in his hands when spacing out, that’s our point here.

one morning, early, hyunjin’s already up. he always wakes up early. can’t not. currently sitting at the counter of his and binnie’s place, hunched forward with that ass posture of his, why is this guy so long, turning a knife slowly in his hand. not like a big one, just… enough to do damage if he wanted to. but he’s not using it. he’s just holding it. plus you would worry about him if he hurt himself. so he’s… not going to do that.

changbin stands there for a second, watching. then he walks over, holds his hand out. “give me that.”

“fuck off.”

“hyune.”

“i said fuck off.”

changbin reaches out and takes the knife.

hyunjin lets him. lets his hand go slack, lets it be taken because nothing matters. fucking psycho.

changbin turns it once in his hand, sets it down out of reach. sighs. mr emo should calm the fuck down. (or maybe changbin should open up his eyes and realize hyunjin is not wrong here, just a more expressed and deeper version of what changbin also was once before you let him hit. changbin is kind of an asshole here, always on your dick and not helping his friend who’s having it way worse.)

that’s why for hyunjin, it’s not just that you’re with other people, it’s who. it’s the details. it’s the images that won’t leave his head no matter how much he tries to drown them out.

you.

on his bed.

changbin’s hands on you.

changbin’s mouth on you.

right there. while he was just asleep. he keeps seeing it, over and over, and it’s not even something he witnessed, it’s something he imagines only, fills in with way too much detail that destroy him but most likely didn’t even happen. like hyune i promise you that they did not kiss that close to you as you imagine it.

it makes his stomach twist. makes his grip tighten on whatevers in his hands at the time. makes him want to break something. or someone’s bones. or his own head on a wall.

and hyunjin can’t be mad at you. couldn’t even try. because to him, you’re, fuck, you’re everything.

when you look at him? it all just stops, just for that long. the constant torture in his head and everything that holds in itself, gone. that’s why he still wants you just as bad. maybe worse.

if you asked him to wait? he would.

if you asked him to share? he might.

if you asked him to stay like this, falling deep into this and mad and completely fucked up over you, just a simple little human? he’d do that too.

but all this waiting just ends up making him… hungrier.

he’s constantly trying to figure out where he fits. where he’s allowed to stand. he doesn’t openly hit on you like jeongin, he can’t give you that. doesn’t do what he wants like seungmin, would mess up everything if he did. doesn’t cling like han, he’d feel annoying. can’t over-daddy everyone like chan, could never be on that level. can’t have the same charm as changbin does, doesn’t have it, what changbin was born with, hyunjin learned himself. wouldn’t get away with being creepy like minho(god, only minho can do it like that, even hyunjin wants to drop his panties when he sees minho be a creep towards you. anyone else would be dead if the boys saw someone act like that, but not minho)

he just… waits. that’s what he does, lives in the back, in the others’ shadows, not even his looks saving him now.

first time having feelings going well so far.

oh, sweetie.

but at least he still has the privilege to steal you sometimes, because you do like hanging out with him. he’s grateful for that. (only has himself to be grateful for, is still grateful for you) he can grab your hand and pull and you won’t resist. you’ll giggle and go with him, even while han keeps making little noises.

“hey, hey, where are you taking her?”

“out.” hyunjin says.

“no—”

“yeah.”

he actually had to stab han in the thigh once just so that he wouldn’t follow you. hyunjin always. makes. sure. the others don’t follow you.

he needs the contact to stay sane. just the two of you’s. he doesn’t even talk much in these hangouts, just sits with you, smokes one maybe, watching you. accepting his heartache when you lean on him a little.

internally, he’s fine then. okay. life is good but then he remembers(just imagines, fuck he remembers if he didn’t see it) changbin on his bed, and it all comes back. he has to throw up again.

“…you really didn’t wake me up, huh.” he mutters one time.

you look at him. you’re beautiful. “what?”

he shakes his head. looks good on him. “nothing.”

drinks again. conversation over. but it’s not over.

changbin has taken that knife out of his hand multiple times now.

walk in. see hyunjin. see knife. say “again?” take the knife. place it somewhere, knowing he’ll find it again anyway. “you’re going to cut yourself.”

“wouldn’t be the worst thing.”

“you’re being dramatic.”

“you’re in a fivesome.”

“…can’t even argue with you, dude.”

it hits him in waves. that would be the best metaphor, though he has lots more of those. one minute he’s fine. normal. functionalish. doing whatever the fuck he does during the day. then next he’s on his bed, flat on his back, staring at the ceiling, flushed, heart doing some weird, uneven shit in his chest.

his brain, all you. again. always you.

he’s just thinking. thinking about the way you act with him. the way you lean into him when he pulls you into him, how you trust him with being that close, trust him to protect you in that position. he feels so boyfriend when you do that. you’re the perfect girl. the way your hand fits in his like it was made to be there. he’s sure it was. it must. the way you went out with him before you knew the others. the way your tits look—holy shit tits. yeah these thought chains can be sweet, can be dirty, longing, desperate, needy, horny, everything.

it’s not just want, attraction. it’s this gross need that took over his perfect life.

it’s unhealthy.

but what the fuck is anyone gonna do about it. nothing. that’s what.

so he gets love drunk. and it’s pathetic. genuinely embarrassing for a man like this. ptoo. this was supposed to be the sound of spitting in him. anyways. he’s on his bed in these little episodes, arms behind his head, staring at the ceiling looking like he just got shot by cupid himself. feels like it too. even ears red, little boy neck warm, just a boy thinking about you. no distractions. no phone. no alcohol (at least not yet, give him ten minutes).

and then there’s the other problem, which is that all this feeling has to go somewhere. and hyunjin is not good at expressing it. at all.

so it leaks. kinda like that. like one late night, hyunjin is not sleeping again. shocking. he’s been staring at the ceiling for… fuck knows how long, thinking about you, replaying everything, overanalyzing shit.

he gets up. no thoughts that drive him, just feels like going. walks out of his room, down the hallway. to changbin’s door, and opens it without knocking. (them not knocking on each other’s doors has gotten them into multiple situations now)

changbin is asleep. shirtless, sprawled out, one arm thrown over his head. he’a cute. such a boy. more man, maybe.

hyunjin stands there, staring. kinda forget why he came for. so he walks in, closes the door, and climbs into the bed.

fucking cuddles up to changbin. like presses into changbin’s side, throws a leg over him, one arm tucked between them and the other over changbin’s body.

changbin obviously wakes up to this, eyes opening, looking down, seeing hyunjin. processing… processing…

“hey, buddy.” changbin says.

“…hi.”

changbin exhales, so soft, adjusting to get comfortable again, then puts an arm around hyunjin.

“you okay?” he asks.

“no.”

“yeah. figured.”

hyunjin presses his face into changbin’s shoulder, trying to hide.

changbin understands. wishes he could do something for hyunjin. these two kill people btw.

at some point, hyunjin falls asleep. changbin goes back to sleep too. cuties.

and they could be doing this more, would help a lot, but when not, they’re at your place. everyone is at your place. it’s not your place anymore. it’s theirs too. they have collectively decided that your space is now their space. your time is their time.

like, some days you walk in, and felix is on your couch, flipping through one of your magazines like he can actually read. (he can)

he looks up when you come in, smiling ear to ear. “oh, hey.”

“hi, lix. what are you doing?”

“reading.” such a cutie. “my horoscope says i’m gonna change the world.”

“amazing, sweetie.”

and when you turn your head because hyunjin is talking to you about how the moon looks like your left tit or whatever emo shit he’s on today, and when you turn back, felix is eating the paper.

you don’t even have the energy to yell anymore. you just take the rest of the magazine before he eats the whole thing.

you like your magazines.

sometimes when the boys are all too much, too loud, too physical, too on you, and you need to calm down before you lose your mind or commit a homicide of your own, you sit down, grab the latest issue, and you read it. close every single one of them out. usually perfect legs crossed, flipping pages while han is trying to climb on top of the fridge, seungmin is shooting at changbin(your neighbors just started moving not too long ago), that’s the game, changbin has to dodge, jeongin climbs onto the back of the couch, start braiding tiny sections of your hair while talking to you. “and then i told the guy i was gonna wear his face as a mask for you, but he screamed so loud i had to—” you hum and don’t pay attention. felix is usually on the floor gnawing on something (sometimes a bone, sometimes one of your socks) making happy little noises, watching the others or plays with them when invited, minho stands there holding one of your bras, sniffing it every few minutes(fucking creep??? hello???), hyunjin tries to read over your shoulder. “this writer doesn’t understand true longing. i would kill myself for you.” chan’s the only one who sometimes just sits next to you quietly(when not sharpening something with little metal shavings accidentally ending up in your hair), arm around your shoulders, scrolling on his phone like a normal(ish) boyfriend until seungmin starts shit talking and they throw hands. it drives them insane because they want your attention so bad but you’re over here reading about skincare while three of them have their dicks out.

you need it because they’re always on you. touching you. leaning on you. sitting too close. standing too close. breathing too close. you’ll be in the kitchen and suddenly there’s a hand on you, any part of you. sometimes head, arm, the boyfriends get private areas privilege of course, whatnot. you’ll be on the couch and someone’s arm is around you. you’ll be walking somewhere and someone’s grabbed your wrist, your hand, your sleeve, something.

“where are you going?”

“over there.”

“why?”

“because i want to.”

“…come back.”

so you need your magazines to ignore them sometimes. and, surprisingly, they don’t bother you that much when they see you’re reading. well, they don’t stop bothering you, they still talk your ear off, but at least don’t rip the magazine out of your hands so you pay attention to them.

when shit gets too… well, psychotic, these men are sick and need you to stop them sometimes, we know that, sometimes you just shove the magazine into seungmin’s hands. he’s usually the closest to you. and you know he’ll hold it.

“read this and shut up for five minutes.” you say, going to the kitchen where minho and felix are about to castrate each other.

seungmin bitches “this is fucking stupid, why do women need ten tips for everything, just suck dick better, why am i—” but two minutes later he’s fully invested in the “sex tips for women who like it rough” article, eyebrows raised, nodding while reading.

you come back ten minutes later with jeongin crying because felix tried to bite his dick and seungmin’s just quietly reading under his breath “pro tip, communicate your needs… yeah no shit.” he hands it back without looking at you, face a little red. “mid.”

they’re always on your dick. you try to pee in peace and the bathroom door creaks open and one of them is just standing there. like changbin, saying “just making sure you’re okay, baby.”

“fuck are you looking at, get out.”

“okay. you’re so cute.” he says, smiling and waving.

chan will knock once, then walk in anyway, starts talking to you. he acts the most normal of them. acts. doesn’t mean he is. he’s not.

han will wander in scratching his balls, go “oh shit sorry” then just stand there watching. fascinated. “you pee like a girl… that’s so cool…” ??? okay??? once he got so excited he started clapping. “wow you’re really going!! good job!!”

seungmin doesn’t really come in unless he needs something or just wants to annoy you, but not like he minds the fact that you’re peeing. once the second you wrapped your used pad up he took it from your hands and threw it into the tiny trash can for you. you, to this day, genuinely can’t decide if that was cute or fucking creepy.

and your bedroom? fucking circus. you have one bed. one. one! you’re lucky that it’s a big bed, but not big enough for the fact that all of these men, freshly feeling men, deeply in love men, want to sleep touching you.

han is glued to you, nonnegotiable. if he doesn’t get to be next to you, it’s “no—no, i’m staying—i’m staying right here—” it’s too much, but you love him. it’s also kind of sad. it’s also incredibly fucking inconvenient when there are also other people in the room.

seungmin is just “this is disgusting.” “move over.” “why is he breathing like that.” “why is everyone breathing like that.” but god forbid he’s not involved.

chan just decides where he’s sleeping and everyone else adjusts accordingly. daddy has built this system up himself.

and you want changbin there, and no way you don’t get what you want(except for peace but whatever) so changbin will be touching you one way or another. that gives him more confidence too nowadayd.

you wake up some mornings with han drooling on your tit, seungmin’s arm over your waist, changbin curled up at your feet the baby(execute him now), and chan somehow taking up half the mattress, with an arm behind your neck!! then you look down and felix is on the floor waiting for you to wake up and spend time with him, jeongin is spooning a pillow, hyunjin is writing something on the ceiling with a marker(???), and minho is standing in the corner watching everyone. waves to you. you hate them. (you love them more than anything and you’re unbelievably grateful for them no matter how horrible they are to the world)

and naturally, now that they’re all over you and see that the others are also all over you, they will… not want to be all over the others too. difficult wording, point here, jealousy.

not so serious that they’ll kill each other(except if you’re minho, he’d kill anyone), god no, but still. some of them are fine with sharing, some get a bit jealous. (but still would share if you told them to. anything you want, y/n.)

right now, the mainly hated one is chan.

well, they actually love chan, in the limited way serial killers can love anything that isn’t themselves and their needs to kill. they look up to him. he’s the most put together in any given situation, minho and felix trying to rip each other’s faces off or jeongin threatening to “end it all” over a bad haircut that’s not even bad and he’s the only one who thinks so, chan’s daddy ass steps in and everything is fine in five minutes. okay, sure, he had to break hyunjin’s collarbone once, but still settled shit.

they respect him. they copy him sometimes. they see how he acts with you and try the same. but right now, mostly they want to kill him.

he’s spending solo time with you today. they know. it makes them want to hang themselves.

right now, hyunjin and felix are… somewhere. no one really knows where they decided to go, just that hyunjin needed to get out and felix followed because he likes hyunjin’s company. (let’s note that he doesn’t know he likes hyunjin’s company, his brain likes it without him being conscious of it.) so they’re spending time together in an alley behind a building. felix is gnawing on a forearm, making disgusting, crunching sounds while he talks to hyunjin.

“and then i was like, wait, what if you just—”

“yeah.”

“right? like you don’t even have to—”

“no, yeah.”

“and then it just, like, came off, right? like, completely off. i didn’t even know that could happen, but then minho told me to put it down and i really—“

“deep.”

hyunjin hasn’t heard a single word. not one. he’s staring off into the distance, mind somewhere else entirely. guess where, you. every few minutes felix offers him a bite and hyunjin politely declines without even looking at felix, it would be hard for anyone else, felix is beautiful. hyunjin just doesn’t care now. it’s sweet that felix still keeps offering the boys bites even though they always say no. he’s either thoughtful or thoughtless and forgot they keep declining. anyways, he swings his legs, talks, goes on, while hyunjin drinks, and drinks, and drinks.

minho and jeongin are out getting rid of a body together, the two of them dragging a trash bag through the woods. they don’t talk much. but they’re having fun. seungmin is waiting in the car, he’s not in the mood for moving around now.

changbin and han are at changbin’s(and hyunjin’s but whatever he’s not home) place.

han is whining. “i miss her already, man, what if—”

changbin has him by the collar, holding him in place with one massive fucking arm holy shit so hot while he stirs something on the stove. “she’s fine, buddy. just chill. i made pasta. eat.”

han tries to run toward the door again and changbin yanks him back. brutal respect to him for never once raising his voice, by the way.

so. you and chan have your place to yourselves. you’re in the kitchen doing shit, chopping things or stirring whatever’s in the pot, while chan is behind you.

he’s such a sex symbol. moves behind you without a sound, psychopath quiet really, big hands on your hips. he leans down, presses a soft kiss to the side of your head. “smells good.” reaches around to steal a piece of whatever you’re chopping, puts it in his mouth, and hums. approval. “missed you today.” he whispers. that, is harder to say. but he did great.

you lean back into him. “missed you too. how was the… thing?” you don’t say kill out loud. ew ew ew. sometimes you dance around it, sometimes you don’t. today feels like dancing.

it’s brutal development, where we are now, where you are about what they do. but you love them this way, learn to accept it.

“i did good. guy begged like a lil bitch at the end but that’s nothing new. told him to shut up and think about his family. made it faster for him.”

you turn your head enough to look at him, to see his pretty face, tasting the sauce off the wooden spoon. offer it back over your shoulder for him. “here. try this. too much basil?”

he takes the spoon, tastes it. nods. “perfect. you always nail it.” he sets the spoon down and wraps both arms around your waist now, pulling you back against him.

it’s weird, that killing gives him this much of a rush. a man who can be this gentle with you is that evil.

and you also give him that rush. you do the same shit to his nervous system but worse. or better, y’know. he gets these random adrenaline rushes just from the way you do even the most insignificant shit like sneezing. now his heart rate raises like it does when he’s chasing someone, so blood reacts to that, and oh look at that, his dick is filling slowly because his body chose you.

the part in his brain that used to only light up for, to react to violence, now does that for your voice. for your anything really, your whole being. he loves it, living with this now. weird. makes him feel human, that used to make him want to peel his skin off.

he’s so in love it’s dumb. lame. his psychology’s new, attachment that used to be impossible for a guy like him now feels like oxygen. you’re the only thing that brings him good emotions all the time. every little interaction with you, or just thinking about you really, gets his dopamine, his dumb man body, higher than any kill ever did.

so, his cock’s half hard now, pressing against the front of his jeans, and it’s not even because his brain got sexual information, it’s because you simply make him this happy.

before you, he thought this shit, talking, touching, just existing in the same room, was a waste of time, oh he didn’t need it. now he’d watch you do this for hours. he’d watch you sleep, he does.

you turn your head to look at him and he catches your mouth in a kiss, no tongue, just wet mouth on mouth. when he pulls back his eyes are dark, pupils big from the love and lust flooding his system. looks good on him. the white feather hawk tail deer hunter likes to keep me cold in the hot breeze summer ever.

“keep cooking, i’m good right here.” he murmurs, not wanting to stop your little woman activity for his dumb dick. but he could cum like this if he let himself, really could, humping you while you finish dinner, spilling in his pants because you do that to him. but he won’t.

“mm.” you reply. “give me time then, i want you to try this for sure. just thought i’d make something you like. i know you love spicy.”

he puts his cheek to your cheek. heartless psychopath, by the way. “i do. you know me so well.”

let’s ignore that he can’t deal with spicy. loves it, tolerating it is another case entirely. you know that, he forgets sometimes.

“i want to know you so well. i care about you, you know. so i worry. what if one day something goes wrong out there? what if you don’t come back? i don’t know what i’d do with all these assholes without you keeping them in line.”

chan smiles. he presses another kiss to your temple, then your cheek. “i always come back. got too much to come home to now.” his hands slide a little higher, palms on your sides, holding you closer. “tell me about your day. you were out earlier. anything interesting?”

“usual. ran into jeongin at the store. he obviously followed me there, but didn’t cause trouble so it was fine. i told him to tone it down or i’m banning him from the apartment for a week, and han tried to cheer him up by offering to share his ‘special’ energy drink. which is just vodka and red bull. they both ended up puking in the bathtub. they left after that. nothing else, actually.

chan hums and holds you to himself, letting you feel him. “fuck, baby. you feel good. always do.”

you bite your lip, getting all horny now too. “yeah?”

“mhm.” he hums, grinding against you a bit. just a little bit, not like, han, who would be full on humping you now. he looks away. “feels good when you worry.”

this is huge, coming from someone this closed off. the progress you made with these boys should get an award, no joke. it’s serious shit.

you add more things into the pan because they need vegetables and thankfully all eats them. then lean back into him more, letting him hold your weight. he’ll always hold your weight. “i do worry, chan. you’re not invincible. promise me you’ll be careful?”

his hips press in again, cock going between your asscheeks over the clothes. it’s not to start anything, just to relieve the situation in his pants. he’s obviously listening to you, kisses the side of your neck even, open mouthed and wet. hot. “i promise, baby. careful as i can be.” another press of his hips, more upwards, breath hitching just slightly. “talk to me more.”

you hum, giving everything a stir in the pan. “okay, fine. i’ve been thinking about getting a bigger place. this one bedroom is killing me with all eight of you basically living here. but then i think about moving and i get this weird panic because… what if the new place doesn’t feel like home? what if it’s too big and you all spread out?”

“mm. i get it. it’s grown on me too.”

you hum, focusing on the food even as your body responds to this man’s whole being. “i’ve been reading this article in one of my magazines about how to deal with difficult people. thought it was funny because none of the tips apply to you guys. ‘set boundaries’ yeah right, tried and didn’t work. ‘communicate calmly’ i do but it doesn’t do anything. but with you they work. you listen.“ you mumble. this is not favoritism, you love the others just as much as you love chan, it’s just a fact that he’s easier to deal with. “anyways, how was your day besides the thing? you went out earlier with minnie, right? didn’t come back covered in blood this time, so i’m guessing you two ate out or something? went well?”

“no that was murder too.”

“oh.”

“seungmin got a little creative with a crowbar, but it wasn’t that serious. you should be proud.”

you put your head back against his chest, smiling. “i am. the others couldn’t do that. han told me he almost set the couch on fire yesterday trying to ‘impress’ felix with some dumb lighter trick. you hear about that?”

he rocks you a little. it’s not even to relieve his boner, it’s just to be close to you. “heard the smoke alarm. changbin had to put the fire out. should’ve seen his face, he thought he ruined dinner for you.”

“poor bin.” you say, genuinely feeling a little bad. you add some soy sauce to the pan. sizzles. “he tries so hard. last week he brought me flowers, it was so cute. you notice how he’s been smiling more since… well, since he got added?”

he watches over your shoulder as you toss the things in the pan around. “yeah. innie’s worse though. he tried to do push ups in the living room to ‘bulk up’ so you’d notice him more. got to twenty, then felix walked by eating a sandwich and jeongin got distracted, fell on the carpet. nosebleed everywhere. han laughed so hard he pissed himself a little. changbin tried to help clean it up but used your good towel. the pink one.”

“NO.”

he hisses. “yeah, sorry.”

you sigh, reaching back with one hand to pat his thigh. “whatever, i’ll ask felix for a new one. speaking of, did you see what he did to my last magazine? ate half of it. i don’t even know how to respond to that anymore.”

his hands squeeze your hips as he rolls against you again, his cock pressing nicely between your cheeks. still patient though. “i’ll talk to him.”

“god, he’s so empty up there.” you say fondly. the food’s starting to look done. “but he tries. in his weird way. two days ago he brought me a flower. like one. picked it himself. it was sweet.”

chan’s hips keep humping into yours, sometimes in circles. “they all try. even seungmin. he bitched about your magazine the other day but i saw him reading the how to squirt article when he thought nobody was looking. turned the page so fast when i walked in. almost ripped it.”

you giggle. “he’s an angel. he leaves hickeys shaped like hearts sometimes. don’t tell him i noticed.“

“wouldn’t dream of it, baby.” oh, his voice is getting a little rougher, but he keeps the conversation going like nothing’s happening below the waist. skill. his free hand reaches around to steal a piece of broccoli from the pan, pops it in his mouth.

you turn the heat down and you lean back into him completely now, and he takes this deep, slow breath.

you smile, god, it’s weird that a smile comes so natural for you, compared to them, eyes half closed, enjoying him.“hey. i saw a bruise on your ribs two days ago when you were changing. it looked kinda nasty. you never told me how you got it. still hurting?”

he huffs against your hair, hips moving against your ass because he can’t help it. “no big deal. just some guy got lucky. nothing broken. barely even feel it anymore.”

you don’t buy it for a second. you turn around in his arms, grabbing the hem of his shirt and tugging it upward. “let me see anyway.”

chan raises an eyebrow, the one without the cute little mole, but lifts his arms to help, that calm, sexy smirk on his face(embodiment of dr dr feel good come make me feel real good fr) as you peel the shirt off over his head and drop it on the counter behind him. oh that’s dada right there. even with the bruise on his left side, ugly, purple yellow thing spread across his ribs, fresh.

your heart does a little twist, these guys are brutal, survive anything basically, but seeing him like this still makes you worry.

you’re the only one who worries for them like this. who knows them like this.

“fuck, chan… that looks like it hurts more than you’re letting on.”

you keep looking at him, not the bruise only,(of course) but just savoring that this is your man. that your man has this chest, these shoulders, these traps, these biceps, triceps, and not to forget that light little happy trail starting under his belly button, leading down into his jeans where his cock is visibly straining, begging for your attention.

it’s really important that it’s begging for yours specifically.

your hand slides down his stomach, fingertips moving over his abs, then lower. you cup him through his jeans, feeling how he presses against the layers of clothing. giving him a gentle squeeze, then a slow little tug, petting the outline of his cock.

chan takes a cute, deep little breath but he stays still, letting you touch however you want. “y/n…” he mutters, plea. there’s a tiny smile on his mouth. you want to rip him apart.

instead, you pull your groping hand away(the way his chest rises at that is panty dropping) and press under his belly button instead, pushing him back gently until his ass hits the edge of the counter.

he goes easy, leaning against it, watching you, letting you manhandle him because it’s you. his hands settle on the counter behind him.

you step in, rise up on your toes, and kiss him.

it’s slow. loving. a psychopath’s love on your lips, really. tasting each other.

one of his hands comes up to cradle the back of your head, the other on your waist, the soft wet sounds of making out in the quiet kitchen or the occasional pop from the cooling pan.

when you finally pull back you tilt your head and kiss along his jaw, then down to his neck. your mouth latches on, sucking blood up to the surface hard, leaving a trail of dark hickeys across his skin. so everyone will see it tomorrow and know exactly who put it there.

one goes right over the tendon that flexes when he swallows. that’s your favorite.

chan tilts his head to give you more room, sighing and grabbing into your hair in pleasure, letting you mark him up.

you keep going, down, down, down, kissing down the center of his chest now. your knees don’t even mind their position so just that your tongue can flick out over one of his nipples, circling it before you close your lips around it and suck gently.

chan’s hand pulls lightly at your hair, a soft grunt escaping him.

you part from him, giving the peaked little nipple(god you’re crazy about men’s nipples) one last little flick before you leave to lick across to the other one, giving it the same love, teeth involved now to make his abs tense under your finger.

lower. you sink down slowly, knees bending until you’re crouching in front of him, eyes locked on his the whole way. your hands slide up his thighs, feeling the muscle there before you lean in and press a soft kiss right to the bruise on his ribs.

soft, careful kisses right over the discolored skin. little pecks that turn into longer presses of your lips, tongue poking out on his hot skin. he’s such a man. a babe too, deep down.

“kissing it better.” you murmur on his skin, lips on the bruise where it’s turning yellowish now.

“it’s better already, baby. swear.”

you smile on the bruise and kiss it again. “good. i hate when you get hurt and don’t tell me. i want you to come home to me in one piece.”

“i always do.” he murmurs. his hand strokes your scalp gently. “always come back to you.”

you move across his stomach then, kissing every inch of skin, dipping your tongue into his belly button for a second to hear the way his breath stutters. he likes that. then back up a little, licking over his nipples again on the way, sucking one into your mouth while your hand strokes lightly over his side.

back up, eventually, standing up again so you can kiss his mouth once more. this time chan meets you halfway, kissing you deeper now, tongue trying to meet yours immediately. big bad psycho man needed this now.

and he’s still so, so hard for you.

when you break the kiss you go back down again, lips finding his neck for more hickeys. you suck a particularly dark one on his collarbone, then soothe it with your tongue. not even close to the tendon’s number one spot in your favorites, but this looks good too. chan’s head is tipped back, eyes half lidded, blissed the fuck out. you kiss lower again, across his chest.

you move down to give the bruise another round of soft kisses, murmuring “still kissing it better.”

“it’s perfect now. doesn’t hurt at all. you fixed it.”

you always fix everything.

you give his hipbone a loving squeeze with both hands, then just again, rise up and kiss his neck again, add another hickey, then find his mouth.

now it’s getting mf wet. lips pulling and sucking until your knees are weak and it’s practically chan holding you up. but why wouldn’t he when you pour this much care into every kiss, every lick, every mark?

he can’t believe that he’s this lucky to have you. he’ll have to go and thank hyunjin for choosing you back then. hyunjin, who chan doesn’t feel bad for even while clearly seeing what he’s going through. he simply couldn’t care when you’re there and in his mind instead. plus the dude will live anyway.

you lose track of how many times you travel that path. down and up, kissing, licking, sucking, making out. each round slower than the last. his neck is a mess of hickeys now, a field really, body hot and flushed, the bruise looking the same but he said you fixed it so you fixed it. his cock stays hard the whole time, straining, leaking a little but no seeping through, but you never touch it again after that first tease. this isn’t about getting him off. it’s about you caring for your man, showing him with your mouth and hands that he matters, that his bruises get kissed, that his cold little psycho heart is safe with you, as crazy that is to say.

you could do this all night.

you pull back to look at him. his eyes are heavy, so beautiful, biiiiig lips a little red, fresh hickeys looking good on his skin. he looks thoroughly kissed and completely content. the dream man.

“hungry?” you ask quietly, nodding toward the cold food.

chan smiles, so rare. “starving, baby. but not for that.”

he leans in and kisses you again, slow, hands sliding to your skin now.

you make everything perfect in his feelingless little world. you make the black and white colorful. you put a meaning into everything.

hours later you’re tangled up in your bed now, sheets kicked halfway off because the two of you went at it like animals after allat slow kissing in the kitchen getting both of you hot and bothered. clothes gone in a second, man fucked you into the mattress until both of you were shaking and swearing and cumming so loud(the way chan was shouting was delicious) the neighbors probably thought someone was getting murdered (again). now the afterglow has you both… like this, naked, sticky, limbs around each other.

chan’s face is on your tummy, cheek on your skin, arm draped over your hip. babe’s almost asleep, breathing slowly, warm puffs ghosting over your belly button every time he exhales. he’s about to fall asleep.

you’re on your back, legs loosely tangled with his, one hand buried in his hair while the other rests on his broad shoulder.

the state you left him in is fucking brutal.

his whole torso is… wow. dark hickeys on his chest, some overlapping where you sucked the same spot twice. a lot of them. like an unsettling amount at this point. there’s a line of them down his stomach, fading into smaller ones right above where his cock is now soft and tucked against your thigh. his nipples are still a little puffy and red from how long you licked and sucked them. you even left a set of teeth marks on the inside of his left pec because you got carried away when he hit that spot inside you. his eyes rolled back then.

his back is shredded with your nail marks, long, red scratches running from his shoulder blades all the way down to the dimples above his ass. you can feel the raised lines under your fingertips when you slide your hand down there. that’s how rough you went. you’ll have to put something on it tomorrow. some cream. one particularly wild scratch is around his ribcage, right next to the bruise you spent so long kissing better earlier. on the side of his face, right under his cheekbone, there’s a fading set of nail marks where you grabbed him while he was pounding into you and you were cumming so hard you saw stars. and then there’s the hickey on his right ass cheek, even though it’s currently hidden under the crumpled sheet.

but right now, your full focus is on his curls.

you’re obsessed with them. they’re so soft, a little damp from sweat, so cute over his forehead and around his ears. like wdym boys have their little hairs too and they live with it.

you thread your fingers through it slowly, scratching lightly at his scalp with your nails when not gently tugging at the hair itself.

chan’s eyes are closed but they’re rolling the fuck back from pleasure under his pretty lids. he even lets out these tiny little “mhmfp” sounds and (which he doesn’t notice) his legs kick a little.

you smile at your big strong scary boyfriend and massage the base of his skull with your fingertips. another soft sound from him. his arm tightens around your hip before it loses tension again because you hit a good spot.

“your hair’s so fucking pretty.” you murmur. you don’t expect an answer. chan isn’t big on pillow talk about feelings, but he listens. he always listens when you talk. he’s okay with you talking.

he knows you know. communication, obviously. hyunjin should learn.

you gather a handful of curls at the crown of his head and give a gentle tug, then release, watching them bounce back into place. chan’s eyelashes flutter against your skin and he makes almost a purr now. you repeat, scratching behind his ear with your nails, then smoothing the curls down only to mess them up again on purpose. all the tension he carries around (the kills, the other seven, the constant everything on everything) just drains out through your touch.

you were born to deal with these psychos, and each of them was born to be right in your palm.

you twirl one curl around your index finger until it’s tight, hold it for a second, then let go so it springs free. cute. chan’s lips part against your tummy and he lets out a quiet “fuck…” under his breath. he can feel his love for you in his arms, not just his huge chest.

you’re like some cat, entertained by this. just playing around. how are they supposed to take your seriously like this??

you drag your nails from his hairline all the way back, then repeat, over and over. soothing. every pass earns you another one of those little sounds, sometimes a hum, sometimes just the tiniest hitch in his breath. big bad man who can choke someone out with one hand and stay completely calm while doing it is currently putty because you’re giving his hair some love.

you trace the shell of his ear with one fingertip, then bury your fingers back into the hair behind it. chan nuzzles closer to your tummy, nose(that you like riding so much) pressing into the soft skin there.

“i could do this for hours. they’re softer than they look, you know that? and the way they curl right here at the nape of your neck… fuck, channie. it’s so cute how hot you are even when you’re being all sweet like this.” type shit good dick makes you say.

“not sweet.” he mumbles, voice muffled and kinda raspy from all the groaning he did earlier. it sounds adorable. “just… tired. you wore me out.”

“hm.”

you know him. he won’t suddenly start talking about his feelings or how much he loves you out loud. but the way his arm squeezes your hip, the way his whole body relaxed on yours(means a lot coming from a psycho who was never felt attachment before) the way he keeps making those baby little noises every time you hit a good spot, that’s his version of i’m so fucking in love with you.

you keep playing with his hair for a long time. sometimes you just let your fingers rest in the curls, feeling the warmth of his scalp. boy warmth. sometimes you tug a little harder, and he rewards you with a deeper sound on your belly.

his nail marked back rises and falls under your arm. so sweet. he’s just a little meow meow(an unbelievably disgusting man to walk this earth)

you tug at a curl, watch it bounce, and smile when chan makes a little sound again. it’s so attractive. more attractive when you remember how fast he can snap spines. weird, how slowly you began to get over these little images. they’re not upsetting anymore, but seeing it in real life would still freak you out, no doubt.

you do it once more, then smooth everything down with your palm, only to mess it all up again because you can’t help yourself.

“love your curls so much.” you murmur scratching behind his ear. “love you, baby.”

chan, sleepy psycho he is, turns his face to press a kiss right below your belly button, then settles again, cheek back on your tummy.

god, you really do love this man.

“Y/N!!!”

han.

home.

the front door slams. immediately after you hear changbin’s slightly panicked voice “jis, buddy, please, calm down, they’re probably resting—”

something crashes. glass? a lamp? maybe the coffee table. another crash, louder. a third noise sounds suspiciously like a chair being thrown across the living room???

you and chan both sigh at the exact same time.

“should’ve locked the door.” he mutters.

before you can answer, the bedroom door flies open.

“hi y/n!! hi chan!!” han says, already kicking his shoes off so hard one of them smacks the wall and leaves a black little stain. you keep telling him to take them off at the door. “you guys won’t believe the day i had! i tried to steal this guy’s car but the keys were in his pocket so i had to cut his pocket off first and then the pocket had a hole and the keys fell into a sewer grate and then felix tried to reach in after them but his arm got stuck and—” he’s talking a mile a minute while simultaneously peeling his shirt off over his head. pants next, he hops on one foot, almost falls, catches himself on the dresser, then yanks them down along with his boxers halfway before stopping and pulling the boxers back up. he leaves them on, thank god. “—and then the guy woke up even though i swore i hit him hard enough and he started screaming so i had to sit on his face until he stopped moving and his nose made this wet crunch sound and blood came out his ears and it was so gross but also kinda funny and then changbin said i couldn’t keep the car anyway because it had blood on the seats—”

he fucking lifts the covers like it’s his god given fucking right and crawls into bed, wiggling between you and chan. half on top of you, one arm over your waist, face nuzzling into the side of your bare boob. his leg kicks out, his foot ends up between chan’s ass cheeks under the sheets.

chan doesn’t even fucking care anyone, just shifts his hips because whatever it’s han.

han’s pretty voice is slightly muffled against your tit now. “anyway i missed you so much i thought about you the whole time even when i was pulling that guy’s teeth out with pliers and you smell like sex. that’s nice. did chan make you cum a lot? he’s good at that. i’m getting better too, remember last time i lasted four minutes instead of two—”

changbin catches up, now at the door too looking exhausted. “i tried. i really tried to keep him outside longer. he just… ran.”

you smile, still playing with chan’s hair with one hand while the other reaches out toward changbin “c’mere, baby. it’s fine.”

he doesn’t need telling twice. he strips fast, shirt folded (really important that he folds it), pants folded, everything placed carefully on the chair(seungmin usually sits in when is not in the mood but still wants to be involved in some way) like a good boy before he closes the door behind himself. then he climbs into bed on your other side, under the covers and cuddling up to you with his head on your shoulder, one big arm going on you too, just under han’s dumb arm and above chan’s being.

now. we got, chan’s face still on your tummy, han’s face in your tits, changbin’s face tucked into your neck, his thigh just where his underwear ends next to chan’s head, and han’s foot still living happily between chan’s asscheeks. chan doesn’t mention it. han sure as fuck doesn’t notice.

you hum, a little sleepy. “seungmin is gonna be so fucking mad when he finds out he missed this. left out again. he’s gonna lose his shit. someone should text him.”

han lifts his pretty head to nod. “yeah. last time he found out we had group time without him he got so pissed he took it out on that one delivery guy. seungmin dragged him into the alley, beat his face in with the pizza box, then used the guy’s own belt to strangle him. the pizza was cold by the time we ate it. sad.”

changbin noses at your skin. “or remember when han accidentally sat in min’s favorite spot on the couch? he didn’t say anything, just waited until han went to take a piss, then followed him into the bathroom, slammed his head into the mirror three times, and made him apologize to the toilet while bleeding everywhere.”

han giggles. “yeah!! my forehead scar is from that! looks kinda cool though. he said ‘next time i’ll use the plunger’ and i believed him so i don’t sit there anymore.”

you snort, still playing with chan’s hair. “jesus. and the stranger thing last month?”

han is visibly excited to tell you about that, foot flexing happily between chan’s cheeks. “oh oh!! seungmin was already mad because jeongin stole his last cigarette, so when this random dude at the gas station bumped into him and didn’t say sorry, he grabbed the guy by the hair, slammed his face into the pump like eight times, then ripped the nozzle out and shoved it down the dude’s throat. started pumping gas straight into his stomach. guy died. we had to hose min off.”

changbin sighs into your shoulder. “he does get… creative when he’s angry. last time he thought chan was hogging you too much he keyed chan’s car with the word ‘selfish’ and then slashed all four tires. chan just fixed it and told seungmin to grow up. seungmin punched a hole in the wall after.”

“he’s lucky i like you more than i like my car.” chan mumbles into your stomach.

“mhm.” comes from han. “he also stabbed jeongin in the thigh with a fork then. jeongin screamed so loud felix dropped his human finger sandwich. he still walks funny sometimes. anyway, he can stay mad. i’m comfy. can i sleep here forever? even if seungmin comes home and tries to castrate me with a spoon?” home. like aw his psycho brain recognized this place as home.

changbin yawns, cuddling closer. “he probably will try. but i’ll protect you. mostly. unless he brings the brick again.” the brick. what could have that been.

you hum an agreement out. too lazy to speak. (but not to play with chan’s hair)

yeah long story short seungmin did end up losing his shit the next morning.

he walked in, already tired and done with everything(but when is he not) saw the four of you tangled up naked and cuddly, and went aaaall the fuck out. didn’t touch you, didn’t even look at you wrong. you’re his god. instead he grabbed changbin by the throat, slammed him into the wall, and started hitting him. men.

changbin, brutal respect to him here(zero respect he’s a murderer), took the first three punches like a champ, blood already dripping from his lip, before he finally swung back because seungmin wasn’t stopping.

they took it to the living room. seungmin headbutted changbin, so he picked seungmin up and body slammed him through the coffee table. seungmin came up laughing like a fucking maniac, genuinely what the fuck is his problem, tackled changbin into the tv, and they rolled around punching and choking and bleeding all over your floor.

they finally stopped when seungmin bit changbin’s shoulder hard enough to draw blood and make him unable to use that arm since the muscle hurt that much and changbin accidentally elbowed him in the balls. both of them ended up on the floor panting, covered in each other’s blood, too tired to keep going.

you made them both clean the mess while you and chan and han ate in bed.

but seungmin never once got mad at you. not even a little. you’re the only thing in his life that doesn’t get this treatment. you’re sacred.

he respects you like crazy. dead serious.

example, last week you told him “minnie, babe, can you keep an eye on felix? i won’t be home and he keeps chasing the mailman and i’m tired of it.”

“got it.”

later you come home and felix is tied to a kitchen chair with zip ties and a gag in his mouth. gnawing on the gag making happy cannibal noises but doesn’t move an inch. package is sitting untouched on the counter. that night you licked seungmin head to toe for that. he melted the fuck away. submissive babe.

another time you’re running late and you text him “make sure han eats something before 8pm. he gets hangry and starts humping the furniture.”

seungmin replies with a thumbs up emoji (which is the most effort he ever puts into texting). when you get home han is sitting at the table eating a full plate of spaghetti while seungmin stands over him with crossed arms. han has sauce all over his face and is mumbling “this is so good bro thank you”

you once told him “if jeongin is in the kitchen for more than twenty minutes, drag his ass outside and make him run laps until he keeps his cocktail recipes to himself.”

next day jeongin comes back sweaty and red faced, thighs burning, muttering “seungmin made me sprint while he timed me.”

seungmin just shrugs when you look at him. “he did eight laps. you’re welcome.”

you told him once that the group chat was getting too spammy and you wanted one day of peace. he immediately changed the group name to “shut the fuck up unless someone’s dead” and then threatened to remove anyone’s tongue if they messaged you after 8pm. jeongin sent a dick pic next to a corpse at 8:45. seungmin showed up at jeongin’s place ten minutes later with a pair of pliers. innie still can’t feel his left pinky. you took this rule out of order because you knew worse shit will happen.

he’s a violent, mean, sick fuck to everyone else on the planet, but the second you speak he turns into the most loyal little dog who ever lived. it’s actually kinda hot.

anyway.

days later you told the others you needed one single afternoon of peace with just changbin. they all whined except seungmin, and he teamed up with jeongin and hyunjin to entertain han for the day. they took him to the zoo.

han, to start the day, tried to climb into the monkey enclosure but luckily fell off. jeongin flirted with three different zookeepers trying to get them to let han “pet the big cats.” hyunjin drew the penguins and showed it to the sea lions. seungmin mostly stood there smoking, threatening to skin anyone who looked at the others wrong, but even he cracked a smile when han tried to hug a llama and got spit on.

at some point hyunjin stood at the lion exhibit monologuing about how the lions understood his pain and maybe he should just live in the savanna now. why is he fucking hilarious. han tried to feed the monkeys his own fingers. seungmin slapped his hand away. jeongin tried to steal a peacock feather for you and got chased by security. hyunjin cried because the butterflies were “too free and i am trapped in my longing for y/n.” seungmin threatened to throw all three of them into the shark tank if they didn’t behave. they behaved for exactly eleven minutes before han saw the gift shop and sprinted inside.

by noon, he almost got fucking bitten like three times. he kept pointing at every animal and yelling for the others to look too, jeongin flirted with the zookeeper girl so hard she gave him free popcorn, then immediately turned around and told hyunjin “she’s nothing compared to y/n.” they lost hyunjin for twelve whole minutes. he was talking with a dad whose kid was running around screaming.

at the end of the day they had dirt on then, ice cream, and a new knife. jeongin had hickeys from making out with the gift shop girl who slapped him after he moaned “y/n” into the kiss. he really did it just to imagine it was you kissing him. hyunjin was quietly crying into his notebook.

which brings us here.

you and changbin are finally alone in the big corner bathtub, water hot enough that steam is fogging the mirror and changbin is fucking dying inside but would rather boil alive than complain. the jets are not on a big setting, so they’re just working a bit on binnie’s back, and the whole bathroom smells like your fancy bath salts that you love and of course the boys will buy for you!!

the water is perfect for you, relaxing, changbin is lowkey dying. his chest and shoulders are turning red from the heat, little beads of sweat rolling down his temples, but he doesn’t say a single word. whatever you want goes.

you’re straddling his lap facing him, arms around his neck. his hands rest gently on your hips under the water, giving you all the love his sick little heart has.

you lean in and kiss him softly, lips sliding together warm and wet from the steam. really wet, he has to die from the heat. send help. but he kisses back just as gentle, tongue brushing yours in wet little strokes. you pull back a little, smile, then kiss him again, noses bumping, water sloshing quietly around you. creates a nice atmosphere.

your hands go down to move up and down his sides, nails dragging lightly over his wet skin. just teasing, running from his ribs down to his hips and back up again. naked men hips are breathtaking, on all eight of them.

every touch makes changbin shiver even in the boiling water. he makes a soft little sound into your mouth, almost a little moan, and kisses you again, sweeter. he could do this for hours and never get tired. well maybe he could pass out from the heat instead whatever.

you tilt your head, kiss the corner of his mouth, then his bottom lip, sucking on it gently before sliding your tongue back in. his hands tighten on your hips, then relaxes again, brain trying to deal with all these feelings.

you keep running your nails up his sides, soothing. he shudders, has to pull away to breathe for a second, then captures your mouth again in another kiss. innocent one.

his hands slide up from your hips, slow. sweet, not the palms that break bones but the palms that find your tits, cupping them both from underneath. so precious to him. he’s holding. thumbs brushing little circles over the soft skin next to your nipples, the more inside of your boobs, closer to your sternum. so loving. a man’s love, for you.

his psycho mind is still catching up to all of this, you can tell. the only high he ever chased was the wet pop of a neck snapping or the way blood sprayed across his face when he carved someone the fuck up. that was love to him. that was everything. (and his car. he loves that car.)

now he feels for you. love. actual love. really a still going crush that makes his chest hurt in the middle of a kill and get him excited that he’ll get to see you later.

but god, it also makes him do shit like this.

he leans in and kisses you again, wetter, weaker this time, mouth slow and so fucking sweet. his lips are plush from the steam, a little swollen already from how long you’ve been making out. he parts them on yours, tongue sliding in, tasting the inside of your mouth, he’s got all day to explore after all.

no rush.

just gentle, the soft suck of his bottom lip pulling yours in, then releasing, then doing it again.

you feel the way his jaw moves under your palm when you cup his face, the pretty shape of it flexing while he kisses you. it’s so intimate. only you can give him this.

one of his hands stays on your tit, while the other slides down your side, not once leaving your beloved skin, all the way to your ass. grips it gently, palm full of you, pulling you bit closer so your chests press together.

his little tummy squishes nice against your stomach when you settle in, so attractive. combined with the manly smell of him, intoxicating. plus he’s sweating so much now the water on his shoulders looks like it’s glowing under the bathroom light, fucking droplets sliding down his body before disappearing into the tub.

even though nothing about this is sexual to him right now (he’s not thinking about fucking, he’s thinking about how you feel, how much he loves you, how lucky he is), his cock is hard between you anyway. pressed up against your mound under the water, twitching everytime you shift or your nails drag up his face, or down to his side again. so sweet, the little guy reacting too.

he doesn’t even acknowledge it, though. just keeps kissing you, the hard on is nothing, something his body does because it’s stupid and in love.

every pass of your nails on his body earns you a tiny sound from him, little moans. so cute.

he kisses you harder for a second, tongue moving around yours, then pulls back to breathe. he needs it.

you drag your nails up his ribs again, slow, smiling at him, and he shudders, hard, mouth going back to yours immediately. he smiles into the kiss, the cutie(only feels excitement when snuffing out a human life) can’t help it, and tries to pulls you closer by the ass, just to feel more of you on him. his sweaty chest slides against your tits, the hand still cupping one of them giving the softest squeeze... was that a giggle he let out against your lips?

this is what you did to him. turned a man who only ever got hard from the smell of blood into someone who gets hard from your smile and your nails and the way you look at him.

he pulls back just a tiny baby bit, side of his nose brushing the side of yours.

“…y/n.”

“mm?”

he swallows, pink face somehow getting even pinker. “it’s… so hot.”

you giggle. he thinks you’re beautiful. “the water, baby? or me?”

“the water.” he mumbles, looking guilty. “i mean you too. but i’m boiling alive. my skin feels like it’s gonna peel off.”

you laugh, tilting your head back. he’d die for you. “and you didn’t say shit?” you lean back in, kiss the tip of his nose, then his flushed cheek. “get the fuck out then. go cool off.”

he moans. maybe at the relief, maybe because he doesn’t want to leave your touch yet.

you pat his chest. “go. i’ll follow in a minute. promise.”

he nods, presses one last slow kiss to your mouth, a little long, but no tongue this time, then carefully lifts you off his lap and sets you back down in the water. the jets keep working on your prettt back as he stands up.

fuck, the view.

water runs off his body, in sheets, on his muscles, his shape, his little soft tummy, water dripping from his still hard cock that bobs between his thick thighs. his skin is almost red everywhere the water touched. chest, shoulders, arms, even the tops of his ears. the nail marks you left on his sides stand out. the hickeys you sucked into his neck look almost purple now, they fit him. you almost wrap a hand around his cock, it’s so there, but really don’t want him overheating so you behave. he steps out of the tub carefully, feet leaving wet prints on the rug you love so much and hit felix once with when he was bad, and reaches for the towel hanging on the rack.

you watch every second of it. chewing on your nail.

the way his back muscles shift when he grabs the towel, the long red scratches you put there. the way his ass flexes, round, soft. the way his little tummy jiggles just slightly when he turns to face you again, towel in hand, cock still hard, now not visible because the towel in his hand just hangs over it. it hasn’t gotten the memo that nothing dirty is up.

he starts drying off slowly, rubbing the towel over his chest, down his stomach, on the scratches, then lower, patting his thighs dry while water keeps dripping from his hair onto his shoulders. fuck.

the way you’re biting your lips, he’s resisting the urge to dive back into the water to you.

towel now wrapped around his hips so it barely covers the bulge, he leans down, presses a quick kiss to the top of your head. “i’ll be in the bedroom. take your time.”

you watch him walk out, towel moving on his cute little ass.

the door clicks shut behind him, leaving you alone in the hot water with a stupid smile on your face.

weird.

duality of man. killer but also oh i won’t say anything about my organs getting boiled because y/n is comfy.

y/n is comfy.

you sink a little deeper into the water, grinning, letting the heat soak into you while you picture his cute ass in the bedroom, probably lying on the bed in just the towel, fanning himself, waiting patiently for you. the best boy.

yeah long story short after you got out of that boiling tub you rode him to almost death.

he was waiting on the bed in just a towel like you imagined he would, still pink and sweaty, looking at you with those big shining eyes. (those only go for his lady, no victim or hyunjin puking at home could make him feel what you feel) you climbed on top of him, pushed him flat, and took what you wanted. rode him until he was shaking, until his eyes rolled back, until he came so hard he went cross eyed and almost passed out. then you kept going until you got yours too, grinding down on him while he whimpered and begged and told you he loved you.

afterward he just laid there like a dead man, chest heaving, covered in fresh scratches and hickeys, towel long gone, cock soft and messy against his thigh. you curled up on his little tummy like it was a pillow and passed out with his arm around you.

next morning.

but today’s mission is simpler.

take felix to his doctor’s check up.

dumb fuck knows the way to your place at least(one of the things he doesn’t forget)

when he arrives he’s wearing one of your stolen hoodies, baby give it back, (oh he’ll get the bathroom mat again for that), and a pair of sweatpants that are backwards. his hair is not messy, surprisingly.

“y/n, we’re going to the doctor together, a date!”

you sigh and walk over to fix his pants(expensive pants, wtf) the right way around. he giggles the whole time, blushing when you pull his pants down and also blushing when you pull them up. “felix, baby, pants go front first. we talked about this.”

“oh. right.“ then he leans in and nuzzles your neck, breathing you in. “you smell like binnie. that’s nice.”

you pat his head, fingers sliding through his soft hair. he’s so stupidly beautiful. why does he have to eat magazines and people?

“come on, dummy. shoes on. let’s not be late.”

you finally get him out the door. he holds your hand the entire walk to the car, swinging your arm, and every few steps he stops to point at random shit.

“look, a bird. do you think it has feelings? i have feelings now. mostly about meat and you.” “that cloud looks like a kidney. i’m hungry now.”

he’s not fucking brain dead, no matter how much we refer to him to as one, so you don’t even have to tell him to buckle himself in. literally the dumbest thing anyone can do is not buckle themselves in. please i’m begging you to and stay safe.

“you’re so pretty. and smart. and you let me sleep in your bed sometimes.” he tells you while you drive.

“thank you, lix.”

crazy. a pretty face that makes people do double takes right before he rips their throat out with his teeth. and last week he bought you a diamond necklace. the range these boys move on is unbelievable. and sweet, considering that you’re their first… first of most things. there’s only one of you in their lives, like a “once-in-a-lifetime connection, essentially love at first sight” says google about a zing from hotel transylvania. “where monsters immediately identify their soulmate.” our only off here is that it wasn’t an immediate realization, anyways “it represents an undeniable, electric attraction, bla bla bla(i’m skipping sentences here, not quoting dracula) that often leads to a lifelong bond.” there we go. you’re their almost zing.

the waiting room is quiet. normal people. magazines (the ones he hasn’t eaten at home). his pretty ass sits next to you, looking around.

“remember what i told you in the car?”

he nods. “mhm. no talking about eating people. no talking about the mailman. no talking about killing. or the boys.”

“good boy.”

the nurse calls you both and she’s immediately smitten with you. her eyes light up when she sees how gently you’re guiding felix by the hand. she chats with you the whole time you’re in the exam room while felix sits on the paper covered table swinging his legs.

“he’s so lucky to have you.” she says warmly while taking his vitals. “most patients his age come in alone and act like it’s the end of the world. you two are adorable.”

felix smiles at her, then at you, then leans over and tries to rest his head on your chest right there in front of her. “she’s the best. i love her so much i’d die for her. or kill for her. or—”

“lix.” you cut in sweetly.

“—or just be really good and not say anything weird.” he finishes, giggling.

he’s so underweight the scale actually beeps in concern when they weigh him.

the nurse frowns at the number. “he’s lost three more pounds since last visit. are you sure he’s eating enough?”

you sigh and launch into the usual cover story while felix distracts himself by counting the dots on the ceiling tiles out loud. “he’s just got a crazy fast metabolism. burns everything off. we try to keep him on high calorie stuff but he’s picky. likes… meat. a lot of meat.”

felix perks up. “yeah, big chunks of meat. sometimes raw if i’m in a hurry—”

“cooked.” you interrupt smoothly, shooting him a look. “always cooked. he’s just dramatic about textures.”

the nurse nods sympathetically, clearly buying it because you’re so calm and put together and she already likes you.

she starts checking his arms and freezes when she sees the mess. bite marks. deep ones. some fresh, some old and scarred over. bruises in the shape of fingers, knuckles, teeth. scars. one perfect crescent bite right above his elbow that definitely came from changbin during one of their play fights.

“oh my… what happened here?” she asks, concerned.

felix giggles again, swinging his legs harder. “oh those? that’s from—”

you clamp a hand over his fuckass mouth and lean in to whisper to the nurse. “he’s… a little mentally disabled, you know? just a touch. gets confused sometimes. wanders off, bumps into things, doesn’t always understand personal space.” fucking lie. there is nothing wrong with felix that can be diagnosed. well, except him being a total psycho, but that has nothing to do with him being dumb. he really is just this empty. but that’s not a disability. “he doesn’t know he’s different. we try not to make him feel bad about it. the bruises are from him playing too rough with the other boys at home. and the bite marks, well, he gets excited and nibbles when he’s happy. like a puppy.”

the nurse’s eyes go big immediately. she nods. “oh, bless his heart. that makes so much sense. you’re such a good girlfriend.”

felix is sitting on the table swinging his legs, humming a little song under your hand while he stares at the poster of the human digestive system. every few seconds he reaches out to touch your arm or your hair, smiling when you let him.

you take the hand away, keep chatting with the nurse while she checks more of him. she asks about his diet again and you spin the same story “he only likes certain textures, lots of protein, we’re trying to get him to eat more veggies but it’s a process.” you don’t mention that his version of protein usually comes from humans and the changes in weight is because he can’t always get what he’s craving, throws tantrums and doesn’t eat or eats lots at one sitting or just a little fruit plate you made him. he’s okay, no reason to worry about his weight, it always changes and he’s doing fine. human is just… not what usually humans eat.

the nurse looks horrified but also impressed by how casually you handle it. “that sounds exhausting for you. you’re such a good partner taking him to all these appointments.”

felix leans over and plants a loud, wet kiss on your cheek, leaving a little spit trail. “she’s the best partner. i’d eat the world for her. wait no, i’d buy her the world.“

you pat his head, smiling at the nurse.

she laughs softly, clearly charmed by the whole thing. “you two are honestly the cutest couple i’ve seen in months. most guys his age are rude. he’s an angel.”

felix smiles. “thank you.”

the nurse melts. “oh my gosh, he’s adorable. so innocent.”

you manage to keep a straight face. innocent. sure. the same guy who rips people apart with his bare hands and teeth.

okay. doctor. another woman. when the doctor tries to check his blood pressure and he starts giggling uncontrollably because “the squeeze feels funny!! like when seungmin chokes me but nicer!!”

when she asks him to open his mouth for the tongue depressor he sticks his tongue out as far as it goes and tries to lick the stick.

you have to physically hold his hand down when she goes for the reflex hammer because he keeps trying to snatch it.

the doctor ends up looking at you. “does he… always do this?”

“yes.” you say flatly. “every single day.”

doctor looks at the nurse. nurse nods in confirmation. great.

“any recent injuries?”

“uhhh i cut my finger last week but then i ate the scab so it’s fine now!!”

“any dietary concerns?”

“i only eat… beef.“ that was a taught answer.

“any sexual activity?”

“y/n and me haven’t had sex yet but i really really want to. she lets me cuddle though and that’s almost as good. sometimes i hump her leg when she’s sleeping but i think that’s normal right?”

you smack his arm. “felix.”

“sorry!!” he giggles, not sorry at all.

the doctor just sighs and moves on.

blood draw, felix sits there swinging his legs, holding your hand, and when the needle goes in he doesn’t even react??? fucking crazy, what he is.

on the way out he gets a lollipop. he unwraps it, sucks on it happily, leaning against you in the parking lot, so pretty it hurts.

“that was fun.” he mumbles around the lollipop. “can we come back next week? i wanna see if they have bigger lollipops. i want you to take me the next time too.”

you sigh, pull him down by the collar of your hoodie to kiss his forehead. he calms down immediately, eyes closing, making a dumb happy noise in his throat.

so. getting back to your place, finally, holding felix’s hand while the other unlocks your door.

han is on your couch, legs kicked up on the coffee table, looking too hot and manly like that for the fact that he’s watching a cartoon about talking animals solving mysteries. a really colorful cartoon. next to him, also watching the dumb cartoon, is hyunjin. grown ass, pretty as sin hyunjin, one elbow on the armrest, temple resting on two fingers, eyebrow pushed up so high it’s basically in his hairline. his face screams i am getting closer to the void and also why the fuck is this rabbit wearing pants. think of the steve harrington picture in tiktok comment sections.

it’s fucking hilarious.

you pat felix’s back. “go play with them, baby.”

“okay!” he skips over (actual skips) and drops himself right between han and hyunjin.

now it’s han on the right, giggling and pointing at the screen, felix in the middle swinging his legs and making little “hehehe” sounds, and hyunjin on the left still doing the exact same temple finger pose, eyebrow frozen in existential crisis.

you shake your head and head toward the kitchen.

changbin is standing by the counter in nothing but sweatpants(that he left at your place for occasions exactly like these, just a reminder, you two fucked last night) the second he sees you his whole face does that adorable thing, big dumb smile breaking out, shoulders dropping, his posture getting better. there are faint nail marks visible across his sides, one dark hickey peeking above the waistband.

he meets you halfway, arms already open.

you cup his face and kiss him soft and sweet. he melts into it immediately, like melts, big hands settling gently on your waist, humming happily into your mouth.

“missed you.” he mumbles when he pulls away. “how was the doctor?”

“fine. he didn’t slip. you guys described it as worse.”

“because with us, it is.”

over at the kitchen counter seungmin and jeongin are sitting on the stools, seungmin is shoveling cereal into his mouth, while jeongin gestures with his spoon. they both waved when you came in.

“—so then i told the guy if he screamed again i’d shove the pliers up his urethra instead of his nose.” seungmin says around a mouthful of cereal.

jeongin nods. “solid. i prefer the slow eyeball route. makes them really panic, y’know?”

“yeah but eyeballs pop too fast. nose takes longer.”

you sigh and reach over to grab jeongin’s empty bowl. seungmin still has half a bowl left so you leave his alone. you rinse jeongin’s out quick, put it into the dishwasher, then, a loud crash comes from the bathroom. something heavy hitting tile, followed by a grunt and the sound of something hitting the wall.

you stop.

from the couch han yells without looking away from the cartoon “minho and chan are in there settling something!!”

hyunjin is still not breaking eye contact with the talking rabbit. “they’ve been at it for twenty minutes. something about whose turn it was to hide the last body.”

whatever. they’ll sort it out.

seungmin finally glances at you, spoon halfway to his mouth. “you good?”

“yeah. it’s fine.”

jeongin looks up at you. sweet boy. (if we made a chart of who’s the worst from the boys he’d be in the top three) “want me to go break it up?”

“no. let them fight. they’ll tire themselves out.”

another crash, this one sounds like the toilet paper holder getting ripped clean off the wall and then immediately used as a weapon. there’s a wet smack, then a low grunt from chan that turns into a growl. something heavy drags across the floor. then a loud metallic clang that can only be the shower curtain rod being bent into a new shape.

you sigh. “whatever.“

comes the sound of a head being bounced off the sink. then the unmistakable noise of the medicine cabinet exploding open, bottles and tubes falling, then plastic crack against bone.

wetness that sounds suspiciously like someone’s face getting pressed into the toilet bowl, followed by gurgling and chan laughing. then a high pitched metallic screech as the towel rack gets torn off the wall.

glass shatters, probably the mirror, and there’s another crash. then a wet slap like someone just got bitch slapped onto the wet tile, followed by both of them breathing hard and… is that minho laughing?

you keep loading the dishwasher, rinsing a spoon, plates.

more thuds, the crack of knuckles against jaw, mean groaning, the shower turning on by accident and spraying water everywhere, someone slipping and eating shit with a loud “fuck—” then both of them cursing at the same time.

men.

silence.

the bathroom door finally opens. out stumble minho and chan looking… fucking horrible, jesus.

both shirtless, obviously. clothes got shredded somewhere between the sink and the shower curtain. chan’s got his left eye shut, swelling, a perfect imprint of your toilet brush handle branded across his cheek, and three long gashes across his chest that look suspiciously like they came from minho’s nails trying to claw his heart out for sport. there’s a fork, a FUCKING DINNER FORK sticking straight out of his left shoulder, blood trickling down his abs. more bruises on his ribs already. what happened to his nipple?

minho’s not doing any better. he’s limping hard on his right leg because there’s a broken piece of the shower curtain rod jammed into his thigh. what the fuck. blood’s soaking his pants. his whole torso is filled with bite marks, type shit anger makes men do, and his neck has a perfect circle of teeth where chan tried to rip his throat out. one of his ears is red and bloody, and there’s soap still bubbling in a nasty open cut across his forehead. he’s leaning sideways, same as chan.

you whine. “boys!”

they both freeze. chan tries to play it chill, blood dripping off his chin, but even he looks sheepish. minho just stares at you with those dead creepy eyes, blood trickling down his temple.

you point at the kitchen stools. “sit! fuck’s sake.”

they drag their feet over and drop onto the stools with grunts of pain. chan winces when the fork in his shoulder shifts. minho’s whole being makes a wet squelch.

the other three in the kitchen watch the whole thing, eyebrows raised. not at the injuries, just trying to guess it you’re gonna freak out internally or you’ll break a wooden spoon on their heads.

you grab the giant fucking first aid kit from under the sink (the one that’s basically a hospital in a box at this point, you need it with them) and stand between chan’s spread knees. first the fork. you grip the handle gentle, thumb stroking his collarbone to distract him.

“deep breath.”

you yank. chan hisses through his teeth. blood wells up and you immediately press a thick pad of gauze to the hole, holding it firm while you murmur “good boy, that’s it, almost done.”

you tape it down tight, then move to the toilet brush imprint on his cheek. you dab it with antiseptic, lots of it, blowing cool air on the sting. he could snap a neck one handed. “this one’s gonna bruise pretty. makes you look tough though. my tough man.” he leans into your touch, looking up at you. such a pathetic little sweetpea. (worst man to exist)

next the chest gashes. you clean each one with a warm cloth, wiping away blood, then smear antibiotic over the red lines. the other four watch your ass while you do it. some of jeongin’s drool end up on the countertop.

you save the (looks like bitten) nipple for last. it’s swollen and angry and… seeping a little. you clean it extra gentle, tongue clicking softly. “minho really went for blood huh?”

by the time you’re done with him he has gauze everywhere, tape crisscrossing his chest, but at least he’s not leaking on your floor anymore. looks good though. new thing to try in the bedroom.

now minho.

you look at the curtain rod in his thigh. “boys?”

jeongin immediately stands up. “of course.”

changbin holds minho’s shoulders. “i’m here.”

seungmin is lazy to help. just sits there with his now finished bowl, also lazy to put that into the dishwasher, watching the two other boys fight the rod out of minho’s leg.

they succeed. the rod comes out with a wet schlick and a fresh gush of blood.

you shove gauze into the injury immediately, your other arm curling around his pretty head to rock him a little. “there you go, deep breaths, i got you.” he gets a head kiss too. “innie, can you get his pants?”

“yeah.”

minho holds into you. arms around you. he’s adorable.

when he gets minho’s pants off for you, you wrap the whole thing, around and around his thick leg(hot) until it looks like he’s wearing a cast.

you move up to the ear next. it looks horrible. you clean the torn, TORN parts, murmuring “pretty boy” he holds onto your hip, eyes squeezed, breathing hard.

but survives. gets a temple kiss and a “good as new.” from you when he’s done.

the bite marks across his torso take forever. there’s like twenty of them, some overlapping though. you clean every single one, slow and loving, so loving, wiping away dried blood and fresh fluids, then smoothing ointment over each perfect imprint of chan’s teeth.

minho feels crazy. crazy in love. and crazy violent from it. he feels like he’s going to blow up.

you finish with the cut on his forehead. you wipe it clean, dab some cream on it, then press a butterfly bandage over it while blowing gently on the sting. “all done, creepy.”

meanwhile, oh your fucking god, the shit jeongin and seungmin talk about. just running their mouths.

jeongin: “look at her go. nurse y/n in the house. bet she’s got better bedside manner than the one who stitched my dick back together last month.”

seungmin, when he had a mouth full of cereal: “minho’s thigh looks like a glory hole.”

“a hole is a hole, bro.”

changbin gives your back a supportive caress from time to time. at least he’s helpful.

in the living room, han keeps tugging on hyunjin’s sleeve, watching the dog fly on some cheese rocket now. what the fuck are they watching seriously. “hyune, look!! the dog’s flying, that’s so cool! do you think i could fly if i ate enough cheese too??”

felix tugs the other sleeve. “hyunjin hyunjin hyunjin!! what if the cheese was made of people?? would it fly faster??”

hyunjin sighs through his nose. “yes, han. flying cheese is a legitimate theoretical concept in cartoon physics. and no, lix, human cheese would probably just smell bad and attract more cannibals. now watch the rabbit, he’s about to say something stupid.”

back in the kitchen you step back and look at your work. gauze, tape, bandages, kisses on every injury. both of them are still leaning sideways but at least they’re not bleeding on your floor anymore. you did great.

you wipe your hands on a towel and plant a hand on each of their heads, ruffling minho’s hair and smoothing chan’s. “you two are idiots. next time settle it by arm wrestling like normal men.”

chan hums. minho’s pretty ass just stares up at you with those wet eyes. you fixed more than just the holes in his body.

felix tugs hyunjin’s sleeve again. “hyu!! the cheese is winning!!”

hyunjin sighs. “yes. the cheese is indeed victorious. profound metaphor for life.” ???

“yo.” jeongin says, holding his pretty face in his hands. “this is exactly like that time hyunjin and seungmin went for each other’s throats in the woods house. remember? shit was biblical, bro.”

seungmin sighs. “biblical my ass. pretty emo bitch tried to slit my throat with a fucking wine opener.”

changbin bounces a little against the counter. “i was there. thought we were gonna have to bury one of them in the backyard. or both.”

minho looks up at you(he looks like a wet kitten) and then back at the others. “hyunjin ended up with a corkscrew through his left nut.”

chan nods, watching the floor. “yeah. he tried to stab min with the fireplace poker. missed and put it through his own foot instead. then seungmin shoved his head into the deer head mounted on the wall. hyunjin looked horrible. then they started rolling around on the rug. seungmin ended up with a black eye shaped exactly like hyunjin’s ring. hyune had teeth marks on his ass so deep we could read min’s dental records.”

jeongin leans forward. “don’t forget the part where seungmin tried to drown hyunjin in the hot tub. then hyunjin started talking about how min’s mother was a whore while bleeding from the mouth. seungmin threw him through the glass coffee table. hyunjin had glass shards in his back for days.“

“still managed to kick me in the balls so hard i pissed blood for three days.” seungmin mutters.

“but you ripped his pants off with teeth and then tried to shove a whole fucking log up his ass as revenge.“ jeongin says.

“then he smashed my face into an anthill.” god, seungmin being bratty is so hot.

chan shifts, even though it clearly hurts his ribs. “they both ended up tied to the same tree with duct tape because we got tired of the noise.”

“okay but what even is the woods house?” you ask.

changbin is a babe. “it was this rich victim’s vacation cabin. super cool, big stone fireplace, hot tub on the deck overlooking the lake, full kitchen, basement we turned into a playroom for… you know, guests who don’t leave. sorry. innie put the deed in his own name after we cleaned the place out, so now it’s technically ours. we go there sometimes.”

jeongin wiggles his eyebrows at you. “and it’s been way too long since we went. the hot tub’s probably lonely. the basement’s collecting dust. we should all go. take you with us this time, y/n.“

seungmin leans down to slap the side of your thigh. “yeah. i could chase you through the trees a little. hm?”

“ew ew ew.” jeongin puts his hands up. “not in front of me, bro.”

“pussy.”

minho’s creepy eyes actually sparkle for once. “i could show you the basement. lots of hooks. soundproof.” ???

chan grunts in agreement, looking half asleep on his stool. “you’d like it.”

“hyunjin!! hyunjin!!”

“dude look!! they’re getting married!!”

“hush.”

you smile.

chan finally pushes himself up from the stool with a groan, his little fork hole hurting. he gives minho one or those manly pats on the shoulder, good fight, no hard feelings, they’ll do it again next week. then he limps over to you, presses a soft, lingering peck to your lips. “i’m gonna go lie down before i fall over. thanks for patching us up.“

you kiss him back gently, thumb brushing his bruised cheek. “go rest. yell if you need anything.”

chan limps off toward the bedroom, still leaning sideways. he looks horrible and also unbelievably hot. like bandages stay ON.

you lean back against the counter, listening to your leftover boys in the kitchen plan their cute little vacation. like aw. they’re men and they want to be there with their friends and they’ll go. aww.

“hyunjin, the rabbit’s throwing the bouquet, catch it!”

“sure.”

you turn back to minho. he looks horrible. “you gonna be fine, creepy? need anything before i—”

“y/n!!”

“y/n y/n y/n!!”

what NOW. you look over. han and felix are both half standing, leaning over the back of the couch. huge puppy eyes. han’s waving both arms. felix is bouncing on his toes, hoodie sleeves flapping. fucking twink.

“come sit!l

“please please please we saved you the best spot, it’s warm!”

seungmin grunts, spoon scraping the bottom of his bowl. “let her go.“

changbin leans over and kisses the side of your head, sweet as ever. “go on.“

you sigh, give minho’s cute little psycho head a pat, and head for the couch before the begging turns into actually yanking at your clothes.

you sit down between felix and hyunjin. han needs to learn that he doesn’t get to have you every single time just because he’s loud and cute and dumb, even if we’re starting with small steps like this, sitting only a person away.

felix’s arm wraps around yours, fingers lacing with yours so he can hold your hand against his chest. oh he disgustingly in love, nuzzling into your shoulder, humming happily, leg thrown over your thigh.

on your other side hyunjin shifts to drape his arm along the back of the couch behind you.

han whines from the other end. “but i wanted to sit next to her, i saved the spot with my butt warmth.”

felix giggles and nuzzles closer to your arm. “too slow.”

you ignore han completely and turn your head toward hyunjin. “what’s up? you okay?”

“mm.” he says, thumb moving to stroke your neck. he’d like that if you did that to him one day. “how are the wounded soldiers? did you have to perform surgery with a spoon again?”

you hum and lean into his side a little. “the usual. they behaved.”

from your right felix tugs your arm, trying to get your attention. “y/n y/n look, the dog is in court.”

you don’t even glance at him. keep your eyes on hyunjin. “tell me more. how you feeling?”

hyunjin’s eyes actually sparkle a little. you caring about him drives him crazy. makes him forget all the dread that the picture of you kissing his roommate on his bed brings to him.

han leans over felix’s lap. “y/n, the cheese just exploded into glitter, look!”

felix whines and pushes han’s head away gently with his free hand while still clinging to your arm with the other. “stop it, she’s talking to hyunjin… but y/n the glitter cheese is really funny though.”

you reach over with your free hand, pat felix’s head once without breaking eye contact with hyunjin, then pull your hand away. han makes noise and flops backward, arms crossed, pouting.

han will learn eventually. or he won’t.

“you didn’t answer me earlier.” felix says, voice softer. so deep, so cute. “i asked you something.”

you watch hyunjin’s face. “they told me about that house in the woods.”

“yeah?” he says.

you nod. “they said it’s under innie’s name. invited me.”

felix tugs at your arm. “hey.”

han leans over again. “what are you talking about, what house?”

hyunjin exhales quietly through his nose. the fucking dog keeps talking on the tv. “they would. show off a little.”

“been there?”

“few times.”

“they said it’s quiet.”

“it is.”

“and kinda hidden.”

“very.”

his hand slides slightly, fingers on your arm.

“why aren’t you answering?” felix says, insistent. “i’m talking to you.”

han makes another noise, frustrated. “yeah, why aren’t you?”

it’s like they don’t exist. it’s killing them.

hyunjin has to hold back a smirk. like a cocky smirk. this feels good after his little heartbreak. let’s not forget that these boys are pure evil, after all, them being funny and in love with you doesn’t change the way they act with each other. unfair assholes.

“you thinking of coming?” he asks you.

“maybe. they made it sound nice.”

his gaze drops to your mouth. then back up. “it is.”

your shoulder presses a little more into his side. “you’ll come too, right?”

direct.

felix straightens a bit, eyes widening. “hey—what—”

han leans over him again, draping himself across felix now just to get closer to you. “what are you saying?”

hyunjin looks at you more… private. biting his lip. “if you want me there, i’ll be there.”

you smile. his hand moves on your arm.

“okay, no, this is—this is weird.” felix says. “you’re not talking to us.”

han nods. “you’re ignoring us, y/n why are you ignoring us—”

you turn just a bit more toward hyunjin.

his eyes don’t leave yours. “gets real dark out there.”

“you like it?”

“i do.”

“why?”

he tilts his head slightly, considering. “no distractions. just… what’s in front of you.”

your gaze holds his. “and what would that be?”

silence.

“…depends.” he says.

felix makes a frustrated sound, tugging on your arm slightly.

“hey.” han says. “hey, look at me.”

felix whines.

han is trying to catch your eye. “can you—can you look at me for a second—” his posture’s off, his hands keep fidgeting, eyes flicking between your face and hyunjin’s. “did i—did i do something?”

you don’t even glance. hyunjin bites a smile back. he pulls you closer.

han notices that. “okay, no, that’s—hey—that’s not—”

he reaches over felix, trying to touch your arm.

felix holds you closer to him. “no, wait, i’m holding it—”

“move—”

“no—”

they start wrestling over your arm.

you do not acknowledge this. at all. hyunjin watches it happen out of the corner of his eye. takes a slow breath.

“this is so unfair.” felix whispers loudly.

“i know.” han whispers back, equally loud. “she’s not even looking at us.”

“i asked like three times.”

“i asked five.”

“that’s more.”

“i know.”

they both look at you.

you continue ignoring them with impressive consistency.

han makes a small, desperate sound. “i can be quiet, i can—i won’t talk, i’ll just—just—”

felix nods. “yeah, me too. i’ll be quiet.” he lasts exactly two seconds. “…hey.” you don’t react. “…this is really hard.”

“yeah.” han says miserably.

hyunjin runs his hand over your arm. he thinks you’re doing great.

they sit there. quiet. for maybe three whole seconds.

“hey!” both of them at once.

“no.” hyunjin says.

“okay.”

silence again.

“chan.” han blurts out, sudden and loud. “where’s chan?”

“yeah, yeah, get chan, he’ll fix it—”

they both look around. for the first time in, what, an hour? two? han’s hands flap uselessly. they both spin around, searching the room for chan.

chan is nowhere in sight.

there’s a pause.

“…wait.” felix says.

han’s pretty head snaps toward him. “where is he?”

felix looks around again. “he was here. he was just here.”

han’s breathing changes to fast. “no, no, no—he was—he—he was here— where did he go—”

you ignoring them. talking to hyunjin. not looking at them. not answering. and now chan(who usually solves things for them) isn’t even here.

nothing is making sense.

han’s face crumples. “what the fuck? what the fuck is happening—”

“i don’t like this.” felix says, grabbing tighter onto your arm, yanking at it. “i don’t like this at all—”

han lets out the most pathetic sob you’ve ever heard and launches himself over felix and into your lap. his arms lock around your neck so tight you almost choke, face burying into your shoulder. “y/nnnnnn.” he wails, voice muffled and wet and adorable. “don’t ignore us please please we’ll be good we’ll eat vegetables and i’ll stop humping the couch when you’re not looking i swear—”

felix throws himself half on your lap too, arms wrapping around your waist, face pressed into your neck. “y/n we love you so much it hurts when you don’t look at us—my please—“ hic “please still love me!”

they’re heartwarming. big ugly sobs, snotty and loud, bodies shaking on you.

han keeps repeating “y/n” whining for his girlfriend while felix just sobs “we’re sorry we’re sorry we’re so sorry” into your collarbone.

you and hyunjin lock eyes over the top of their heads.

hyunjin’s eyebrow is arched so high it’s basically touching the ceiling. he lets out the longest, most exhausted sigh you’ve ever heard from him.

well. that didn’t work.

“alright, alright.” you murmur. your very loving arms come up, one around han’s back, the other sliding around felix’s waist, pulling both of them in tighter. “shhh, babies. i’m right here. i was just talking to hyunjin for a minute.”

all your they need to learn space effort? completely fucking gone. forget about it.

han is shaking, body convulsing. “i thought—” he starts, then stops because he doesn’t even know what he thought. “you weren’t—i didn’t—just don’t do that—”

“y/nnnn—” felix cries. “you weren’t—why weren’t you—”

“don’t, don’t do that.” han mumbles into your neck. “don’t ignore—euh.”

“i’m right here.” you coo.

“okay, okay.” felix sobs.

hyunjin is… weirdly turned on by this.

“don’t do that again.” han mumbles into your neck. “don’t—don’t pretend i’m not there.”

“i wasn’t pretending.” you say, squeezing felix.

“…you were.” felix insists, but he’s just confused.

“i was making a point.”

“…i didn’t get it.”

“…yeah.” hyunjin mutters. “we noticed.”

you shoot him a look. he lifts his hands slightly. what? it’s true.

han pulls back to look at you, eyes big, glassy, beautiful. “what point?”

“that you can’t have my attention every second.” you say.

“…why not?”

genuine confusion.

felix nods. “yeah.”

“because i’m a person.” you say. “not something you pass around or grab whenever you want. you boys always do this, since the very beginning i met you guys. i need some space too. i always tell you. but you’re right for crying, and i’m sorry i made you feel bad, okay? i was kind of mean, sorry.” means a lot that you teach them that apologizing is mature, that it’s fair, that they should, that recognizing your faults is the right thing to do. “just keep my needs in mind the next time.”

they both go quiet. not because they understand, but because… that sounded important.

“…okay.” han says slowly. “but can i still be here?”

“yes.”

he cuddles back to you.

felix relaxes too with a satisfied little exhale. “okay. that’s fine then.”

that’s all it took.

you lean back into hyunjin again. “they’ll get it eventually.”

“no, they won’t. but it’s cute that you think that.”

you keep rubbing their backs, big slow strokes, pressing little kisses wherever you can reach, han’s forehead, felix’s cheek, the top of han’s ear when he tilts his head.

hyunjin wants to pounce on you.

eventually the sobs go off into wet sniffles and hiccups. han’s death grip around your neck loosens. felix stops shaking and starts making those tiny contented hums he does when he’s happy again. their teary little faces slowly turn back toward the tv. they’re adorable. (ruthless serial killers)

the cheese rocket has landed and now the rabbit is talking to some carrot.

they both go quiet after that, just watching the screen in silence. han’s thumb rubs over your collarbone. felix nibs and drools on your shoulder but you don’t mind now.

you glance at hyunjin again.

“lesson learned?” he murmurs.

“slow steps.” you whisper back, still rubbing han’s back and felix’s hip. “they’ll get there. eventually.”

you’re definitely sucking han off later for this pathetic little performance. but for now you just hold them.

crisis over.

lesson… not really learned.

but attempted.

okay not even attempted because han lets out a shaky little breath on your neck, then another, hotter one, and his arms tighten around you again, but now to hold himself up better.

“y/n, i… i need you…” he whimpers into your neck, voice wet and needy.

lesson definitely not learned.

you close your eyes, taking a big breath, then… then… fuck’s sake he’s humping you.

“han. baby. we’re on the couch. there are people around. public living room. not the time.”

he doesn’t hear you. or he hears you and his single brain cell can’t process what you just said. he nuzzles into your neck, lips on your skin, hips grinding, desperate. “i’m so hard it hurts, please, just a little… i’ll be quick i promise i’ll be so quiet.”

“han.” you hiss, trying to push his hips back gently. “not here. the others are right fucking here.”

“but they’re watching cartoons, they won’t mind, i love you so much my balls feel full and sad…”

hyunjin and felix are watching with enormous eyes.

holding their fucking breath. hyunjin’s eyebrow is frozen in pure fascination, lips slightly parted. his whole body has gone still, drinking in every second of han’s pathetic grinding and whimpering. felix’s eyes are even bigger, hungry, mouth hanging open a little as he stares at the way han’s hips move against you.

they watch, breathing a little faster, clearly turned on by the fact that they’re this close to something they’re not allowed to have yet. it’s hot to them, seeing one of the “chosen four” get needy right in front of them, knowing they don’t get to touch you like that. they don’t get to fuck you, don’t get to be inside you, don’t get to be openly needy like this in front of everyone. but now they see it this close up. voyeuristic.

they’re both leaning in unconsciously, eyes glued to you two. like fucking porn.

you try again, one hand pushing gently at han’s slutty little hip. “han. public. people. stop.”

“but it hurts. please just touch it a little, i’ll be so quick, i promise.”

he needs to be put down. euthanized. neutered. something.

it’s even deeper for the other two after those words because han is being so relatable right now. like literally yes y/n it hurts just please touch it a little. that’s all they want too.

you’re about two seconds from dragging him off to the bedroom by his ear to chan when minho slowly limps over.

stops in front of han. says in that flat, creepy monotone: “you want to see my cats?”

han’s head snaps up. his eyes go wide. “all of them?”

minho nods. “yes. they missed you.”

“holy fuck yes!!” he scrambles off your lap, dick still visibly hard in his pants but suddenly irrelevant. he grabs minho’s arm (not careful of the bandages) and starts dragging the limping murderer toward the door. “let’s go let’s go i wanna pet dori he let me hold him last time—”

minho lets himself be pulled, but right before they disappear out the door he glances back at you. his version of i love you is saving you from situations like these. he did this for you.

you mouth a “thank you” and he gives a tiny nod before limping after han.

“bye y/n i love you i’ll be good i promise!”

the living room goes quiet except for the cartoon still playing.

felix, seeing that that situation is over, gently takes your hand. sighs. what does this angel could possibly have to sigh about. he brings two of your fingers to his mouth, innocent for a murderer, and slides them between his soft lips. oh, sweetheart. he starts sucking gently, tongue moving under your fingers.

god, he’s heartwarming(you shout his head off at least twice a week because he got blood inside the apartment again). you pump your fingers once because you know he likes it and he deserves it now, and felix’s eyes roll straight back into his head. actually moans, the sweetie. his whole body shudders.

hyunjin is going to combust just from watching. he’s genuinely starting to think about acting dumb just so that you’d give him this treatment too. like give him your fingers now.

you finally peel your eyes away from felix’s pretty little face(that does things to you, you can’t deny) and glance toward the kitchen.

jeongin has lost his shirt somewhere in the last five minutes??? hello?? his back is breathtaking. broad. literal work of art covered in old scars and fresh little bruises from whatever he got into yesterday. cutie. the muscles shift and flex as he does something in the sink.

you can see the little dimples above his ass. he really is hot. annoyingly hot. unbearably hot. fucking hot. has the kind of back you want to drag your nails down just to watch him arch. fuck.

thinking all this while the official boyfriend(well, one of them) is right next to him btw. shoulder to shoulder, both of them with their backs to the living room but at least seungmin has his shirt on. you’d be lowkey worried they’re plotting something again, but then changbin walks over to your little trio on the couch.

you want to RIP this man apart. bare chest and soft little tummy on display still, like put a baby in me. especially with the way he leans down and pats felix’s head, GENTLY.

felix makes a happy little sound around your fingers but doesn’t stop sucking.

changbin looks at you. “i’m heading home soon. you wanna come with me?” his eyes go to hyunjin. “you coming too?”

hyunjin leans his head back. “yeah. might as well.”

you smile up at changbin. “sure. sounds good. let me wrap things up here.”

felix makes a sad noise when you finally pull your fingers out of his mouth. a thin string of spit connects your fingertips to his bottom lip for a second before it breaks. he whines softly, lips chasing them for a second, disappointed.

“felix. hey.” you say gently, cupping his face with both hands, he doesn’t mind his own spit on him anyway. “i’m going out with binnie and hyune for a while, okay? you did so good at the doctor’s today. i’m really proud of you for not telling the doctors about the mailman or anything weird. you were good.”

he smiles, nuzzling into your palm. “really?”

“really. now go watch the rest of the cartoon. behave while i’m gone.”

he nods. “i’ll be so good. i’ll only eat one crayon if i get sad.”

you kiss his forehead and stand up. hyunjin gives your neck one last slow stroke before he pulls his arm back, rising with you.

you head into the kitchen for a quick glass of water. jeongin and seungmin are still at the sink, talking about something that sounds suspiciously like the best way to dissolve teeth.

“i’m heading out with bin and hyunjin for a bit.” you say, reaching past jeongin for a glass then to fill it.

seungmin nods. “don’t do anything i wouldn’t do.”

“that leaves a lot of options open.”

you step up behind him, lean in, and press a sweet kiss right to the side of his neck. was it on purpose that it was right over that sensitive spot you know drives him crazy? yeah, don’t be silly.

seungmin stiffens. there we go. you love leaving him horny on purpose.

jeongin turns his head just in time to catch the end of it. then he shoves his pretty face into the side of your head, nose burying in your hair, arms trying to snake around you. “my turn, my turn—”

you shove his face away with your palm. “down, boy.” you bend down to put your empty glass in the dishwasher and notice both seungmin’s and jeongin’s cereal bowls are already inside. well, you put jeongin’s there, but not seungmin’s. “look at you two actually putting shit away by yourself. i’m proud of you.”

seungmin turns around, sporting a half hard bulge you left him with. “it was me.” he’s so cute because like you need to know that he did it for you!!

pulled a face off in one move yesterday btw.

you give jeongin’s cheek a quick pat before heading back toward the living room. changbin got a shirt on since that(went into your room for it, the sleeping chan didn’t even wake up). hyunjin’s eyes flick over to the couch where felix is watching his cartoon.

“ready?” changbin asks, reaching for your hand.

you take it, lacing your fingers with his. “yeah. let’s go.”

changbin presses a soft kiss to your temple(my boy changbin getting feelings even though he’s a brutal psycho!! fuck it up changbin!! be a good boyfriend changbin!!) then the three of you leave.

god, you love how fancy their apartment is.

you love eating breakfast here. sitting at the island in one of changbin’s or hyunjin’s big shirts while one of them makes food, usually changbin, and those times hyunjin usually reads the news on his fucking ipad(this man and his fucking apple ecosystem), occasionally glancing over at you.

you love watching the city out those big windows, especially at night. you love the soft lighting in the living room that makes everyone look so hot. like why don’t they throw orgies in here? (you don’t know this but hyunjin once did, next day he cleaned up so good that changbin never found out)

now that we’re at this topic, you also really love fucking like animals with changbin when hyunjin’s not home. like, really, loud, sweaty, no restrictions, no rules or limitations sex on every surface. you love curling up by the windows with a mug, watching the city lights while his tongue is between your legs or while you’re just… sitting. could be either.

he gets loud when he cums. manly shouts that bounce off the pretty ceilings(yours has pesto stains on them from one of minho’s and seungmin’s fights). you love that he gives noises. you’ve broken two chairs and one coffee table because he gets too enthusiastic and forgets what his thick thighs can do.

but right now? right now you mostly love how fucking all about you they both are.

changbin unlocks the front door with one hand, keys jingling, then steps aside and gestures for you to go first. hyunjin does the same on the other side, holding the door open.

partly because they’re gentlemen.

partly because they’re in love with you.

and partly because you have a great ass and they both want to watch it as you walk in.

“go on.” changbin says, nodding inside.

“yeah.” hyunjin says. “after you.”

you can feel their eyes on it the whole three steps it takes to walk inside.

hyunjin is fucking mad tho. mad over the fact that changbin gets to tap that. changbin gets to fuck that perfect ass whenever he wants. changbin gets to bury his face between those ass cheeks and thighs and make you scream while hyunjin is stuck in the next room.

it burns. he wants it so bad it makes his stomach twist, makes him have to throw up.

he was there before changbin even considered looking at you like that.

and if he’d just… if he’d just said something earlier… if he’d just… but he didn’t.

and now look where that got him. fucking idiot.

changbin shuts the door behind you, kicking off his shoes. “client today was a fucking nightmare.” he says, running a hand through his hair. “he was calling me the whole time you were away with felix. some rich asshole who wants to ‘get shredded for his mistress.’”

hyunjin heads straight for the kitchen, already reaching for a glass.

“yeah?” you ask, cutely getting your shoes off.

“yeah. i’m thinking okay, cool, leg day, cardio, whatever. then he starts asking if i can meet now. i already have told him no a hundred times at least. fucker. then told me he’ll do it himself then and i tell him what to do. no.”

hyunjin snorts from the kitchen. “hate those.”

“he’s going to hurt himself.” changbin continues. “and then he’ll come back acting like it’s my fault.”

“it will be your fault.” hyunjin calls out, already pouring himself a drink. “you didn’t stop him.”

“i did.”

“clearly not enough.”

changbin shoots him a look.

hyunjin just raises his glass slightly in response, completely unbothered.

“what’d you do?” you ask.

“told him we’ll redo everything.” he says. “properly. slower. he hated it.”

“good.”

“yeah.”

there’s a pause.

“had to deal with a buyer after that.”

ah. there it is. changbin’s little side job of selling organs.

hyunjin lets out a low whistle, taking a sip. “bad one?”

“annoying.” changbin says. “kept asking questions.”

“that’s never a good sign.”

“no.”

hyunjin sets the glass down, then reaches for a cigarette, tucking it between his lips. he flicks his lighter. click, flame, inhale.

there it is. drink in one hand. cigarette in the other. leaning back against the counter.

like, how?

how the fuck is he this beautiful while living like this?

you stare for too long. he notices. his gaze flicks to you, then away again. inhales. exhales.

“price wasn’t even the issue.” changbin says. “he just wouldn’t shut up.”

“should’ve shut him up.” hyunjin mutters.

“considered it.”

“and?”

“wasn’t worth it.”

hyunjin taps ash into a tray, looking at you looking at changbin, paying attention to changbin, not him. but at least you’re here.

he’ll take it.

even if it’s not everything he wants. he’ll take it.

meanwhile all that’s in your mind is how comfy the couch looks. insert that picture where squidward looks like death and next to him spongebob is throwing his hands up smiling ear to ear. you and hyunjin fr. anyways, you do go and make yourself comfy on the couch, then pat it on either side of you. “come here, both of you. tell me more.”

changbin drops down on your left, big arm around your shoulders. hyunjin sits on your right, long legs laid out, cigarette letting that pretty smoke come. changbin tried to get him to stop smoking at least in the apartment but i think we see it didn’t do much.

changbin is still irritated but relaxed now that he’s home, that he’s with you. “guy kept calling his biceps the guns. i wanted to tell him the only gun was the one i had in my back pocket.” now that he said that, he begins to wonder where did it go. it sure got out his pocket at your place, must be there somewhere if nobody took it.

hyunjin hums. flicks ash into a fancy crystal tray. tf. “clients get stupider every week. last week some guy asked me if i could ‘source’ a liver that still had the gallbladder attached because ‘it adds flavor.’” he takes another drag, exhales “i charged him extra.”

changbin groans and squeezes your shoulder. “at least your idiots pay in cash sometimes. mine keep trying to pay in bitcoin. like fuck your mom.”

you don’t know if you should be turned on or deeply concerned and upset about what you’re hearing. both work.

changbin’s phone starts buzzing in his pocket.

he gets it out. looks at the screen and sighs. “it’s minho.” he picks up. “yeah? what’s up?”

you and hyunjin go quiet, watching bin’s face. it stays neutral for the first ten seconds. then his pretty jaw moves. then the vein on his forehead starts popping. another vein bulges in his huge left bicep. the big arm around your shoulders slowly turns hard. just again, turned on or, well, terrified is the other option in this scenario, you don’t know what you should be.

he listens for another thirty seconds, says “mm” twice, then hangs up. without saying goodbye, by the way. the phone gets placed down with way too much care. looks like if he slams it he’ll break the entire table.

he stares straight ahead at the window for a long time.

“han and jeongin fucked up. bad.”

you and hyunjin look at each other. you both can tell the two aren’t in danger or with police, changbin would be out the door already if that was the case, so you’re not worried.

changbin, though.

“they picked up some guy from the bar. everything was going fine until they cut off the guy’s fingers, all ten of them, and told him if he could juggle them for thirty seconds without dropping any, they’d let him go. minho said the guy was screaming, blood everywhere, fingers all around the place.” his hands flex on his (thick)thighs. the veins in his forearms are now basically fucking his skin. “they found it funny. apparently, they were laughing so hard they didn’t notice the guy’s girlfriend had followed him from the bar and tried to record. they almost got caught on camera. minho had to go clean it up, drag the girlfriend inside, and deal with the mess.”

so that’s what the case is. an almost caught. he gets angry at those.

the psycho part of changbin doesn’t come out in the way he acts, like minho having defects with communication, for an example. seungmin also has a hard time communicating sometimes but he’s significantly better. anyways, changbin’s defect doesn’t work socially.

what his main problem is, is dealing with anger.

this is why he killed for the first time, we already know that. it was pure, blinding anger. he can’t process it. never could. it doesn’t leak out in mean little comments or creepy staring like the rest of the boys. changbin explodes.

therapy? useless. talking? makes it worse. even fucking it out doesn’t work, so you don’t even come in handy now. plus getting his dick hard is difficult when he’s having one of these anger meltdowns. nothing helps. he just has to deal with it until it’s gone.

he stands up slowly. “i can’t deal with this shit.”

you’re mortified by what you just heard about what the two boys did but you’re also lowkey excited to see what he’ll do now. like that’s your boyfriend, go boyfriend, crash out!!

“those fucking idiots.” he says, voice shaking. “i told them. i fucking told them to keep it clean. but nooo, han has to turn every kill into a fucking children’s birthday party and jeongin just has to let him do it.”

“hyunjin. we are SO fucked.” you whisper.

something flies past your heads.

(not aimed at you, never at you, changbin would rather saw his own arms off)

hyunjin takes a slow drag from his cigarette. “myeah.”

you both get behind the couch. it looks stupidly cute from the outside, you two not visible but his smoke coming out anyway.

changbin flips the coffee table with one hand. it crashes into the wall. “i do everything right! i train those stupid clients, i move the organs, i keep the bodies from piling up in the fucking hallway, and these two dipshits treat it like a fucking joke!”

a lamp flies past. then the remote. then one of hyunjin’s fancy poetry books (hyunjin winces).

you peek out to take a look at your boyfriend now throw a little vase hyunjin purely keeps on the (now flipped over)coffee table for decoration. you turn back quickly and look at hyunjin with big eyes.

and he exhales a smoke ring???

“are they fucking five!? i told them, i fucking told them, keep it simple! strangle and dump! but nooo, they gotta make it into amateur porn! ‘funny’ my ass! i’m gonna shove my foot so far up han’s dumb fucking colon he’ll taste my toes for a week!”

another object flies, this time it’s the heavy crystal ashtray hyunjin was just using.

“i’m gonna skin jeongin alive and turn his little face into a fucking puppet. i’m gonna make han eat every single finger he juggled. raw.”

he grabs the expensive leather ottoman and throws it into the kitchen. wow.

hyunjin calmly takes another drag of his cigarette.

“binnie, baby—” you start.

“and the woooooorst part?! they’ve did this hundreds of times already! and they never.” he claps his hands. “fucking.” clap. “learn!” clap clap clap clap. “i’m gonna shove both their heads up each other’s asses and—”

another object flies. it bounces off the wall and lands in the potted plant hyunjin mothers so hard. he actually puts his hand out towards it but pulls it back into his lap almost immediately.

he sheds a tear for his beloved plant then moves on. “this is your boyfriend.” he whispers, tapping ash into an empty glass he grabbed on the way down. “romantic.”

“shut up. you’re hard, aren’t you?”

“painfully.”

crash.

silence.

changbin finally stops, chest heaving, standing in the middle of everything. he looks around at the mess, then at the couch you’re both hiding behind.

“…sorry.” he mutters. “didn’t mean to scare you.”

you peek over the couch, smiling. “you didn’t scare me.”

hyunjin takes one last drag, flicks the cigarette butt into the glass, and stands up. “i’ll order new furniture. again.”

he was two seconds away from leaning in and stealing a first kiss while changbin was distracted. his lips were already tingling with the possibility. but changbin came down from the rage too fast. damn it.

changbin rubs the back of his neck. “i’ll pay for it.”

you crawl out from behind the couch, smiling ear to ear and stepping over the shit he destroyed, and wrap your arms around his waist from behind. “you’re okay.”

he leans back into you. in the smallest, saddest voice you’ve ever heard from him “they juggled fingers, baby.” like aw okay binnie :(

hyunjin watches the two of you. jealous. fuck. he needs another drink. what happened to his earlier one anyway? oh, it’s pouring down the wall right there. okay.

yeah, shit like this happens all the time.

like seungmin’s mean little bitchass gets set off and suddenly it’s world war iii. (yeah he’s the worst, just blows up over anything small) last month jeongin ate a little yoghurt (the one seungmin had been thinking about all day) and seungmin tied him to a dining chair with duct tape and zip ties, then spent forty five minutes beating the absolute shit out of him with a bag of frozen chicken breasts.

chicken breasts everywhere. raw meat juice all over the floor. when seungmin finally calmed down he just cut jeongin loose, patted his bloody cheek, then crawled into your bed at 3am and cuddled up to you.

han once got mad at felix for eating the last of his crayons (the blue ones taste best, apparently, han just uses them to draw). han started screaming at the top of his lungs, stomped into the kitchen, grabbed a plate, and smashed it directly onto his own forehead. the plate shattered. his eyes rolled back and he dropped, out cold for six minutes. you had to ice his forehead.

once minho wordlessly took one of chan’s knives and left it covered in some random guy’s spinal fluid. chan found it, then destroyed every single plate in minho’s kitchen by throwing them one by one into the bathtub. when he was done he sat on the edge of the tub, covered in shards, and whispered “i need a minute.” he let you patch up his cut hands.

chan is fucking HILARIOUS in general. like another one was when he smashed a blender in one hand because jeongin pissed him off.

now that we’re at jeongin, oh he’s the hot babe ever(deserves death), you left him on seen once and he spent three hours shouting at hyunjin at the top of his lungs while carving lines into his own thigh with a razor. then crawled to your door at 2am covered in blood, begging you to kiss it better.

yeah he’s really… unstable.

not as unstable as hyunjin tho. last time he got jealous of changbin he disappeared for six hours and came back with someone else’s tongue in a jar as a gift. you made him throw it away but let him cuddle you while he read you something. he wants so badly to be allowed.

minho is… fucking terrifying. once chan accidentally sat in minho’s favorite staring at y/n spot. minho killed ten people that day.

felix doesn’t get mad lots. or angry. or any of those. he once got mad because you called han baby and not him. he disappeared for three hours and came back dragging a whole ass traffic cone he stole. he tried to eat it.

and we already saw today what happens to changbin. like he does this. once jeongin made a your mom joke and changbin flipped the entire couch, punched a hole through the wall, then spent twenty minutes doing pushups.

they are genuinely horrible at dealing with feelings. well, who can blame them, this is their first time experiencing them, but still, this canNOT be good for you. your mental health. your pussy, sure, the boyfriends do fuck it out sometimes, but let’s be real, it’s extremely unhealthy that you have to deal with these fuckers all day long.

but you like it. so, it is what it is. you’re fine.

you have fun with them. that fun can mean going out with hyunjin for coffee or yanking felix off the couch by both hands on his hips because he keeps humping it, but you really did grow attached to these boys. who cares that they tried to kill you.

that fun can also mean just hanging out with the boyfriends. little dates. seungmin once dragged you to a hardware store just so he could “look at knives and feel better.” you ended up making out in the aisle between the chainsaws. han likes when you let him eat you out. LET him. he has to beg. chan just wants to lie on your chest and have you play with his curls. changbin just needs to touch you to have fun, that can mean his toe in your ear, even. just please omg he has to touch y/n.

lol. men are so fucking adorable you might actually have to smash a plate on your own head too at this point.

like wdym these eight brutal psychos have little feelings??? wdym they get genuinely upset and their little hormones work and testosterone works and it comes from their balls?? AWWW MEN’S BALLS!!! balls gotta be the cutest fucking thing on earth istg. they’re so vulnerable!! they protect them!! they cup them when they’re scared!! the others kick them during fights and they curl up and it HURTS them!! sensitive little guys just hanging out between their legs, trying their best, getting cold and going up inside then dropping back down!!! hello to you too balls!! but they also make cum and babies and rage and horniness and all the stupid boy things and they’re just. down there. existing. between their stupid little legs. swinging. awww.

what do you meeeeaaaann all eight of your psychos have their own pair!!! men are SO cute.

you had to literally bite your fist the other day when hyunjin was manspreading on the couch and you remembered there’s a whole sensitive little sack there, vulnerable and warm and full of his lowk suicidal sperm. aww.

i’m crine the FUCK is your problem y/n😭😭😭

seungmin has straight up slapped your hand away in public before when you tried to sneak a feel. didn’t even look at you. just smack on your wrist, then kept talking to the cashier like nothing happened while you stood there grinning.

you MIGHT have gotten soft on these psychos.

you’re a freak.

but tbh each of the four you’re actually dating needs exactly you. exactly your sex drive. exactly the way you are.

cute. so fucking cute. men are awesome.

sometimes when chan is just sitting on the couch minding his own business, biiiig thighs spread, you’ll casually reach over and grope him through his pants. you’re brutal. palm covering his soft cock and balls, squeezing around.

he just sits there. letting you play w the jewels. sometimes he’ll keep watching whatever he’s watching, sometimes he’ll look over at you(calm, MANLY) murmur a “having fun, baby?”

you love how he feels. that he has those there. love how he trusts you completely with the most sensitive part of him.

when you get a little too enthusiastic and squeeze too hard he just jerks his hips away once and says “ow”. then you lean in and kiss his cheek as a little apology.

he accepts it. patting your head. he loves it. truly thinks he found a once in a lifetime gem with you.

god you’re so down bad.

you feel lucky too. unbelievably. what do you mean you have these psychos at your feet.

kinda… literally at your feet.

what we mean here, is once han is being annoying again, all around you. he keeps bumping into you, pushing you, giggling around, trying to “help” you reach the top shelf even though he’s only about two inches taller and mostly useless.

“y/n you’re so short it’s cute, wait no, i’m short too, we’re both short, that’s why we fit so good when i’m inside you!!”

you spin around and slap him lightly across the face. not hard. it’s genuinely just playful. doesn’t even hurt.

his eyes cross instantly. his mouth drops open, body jerking. he squeaks a “hnn?”

his knees buckle. he drops to the floor, landing on his ass with a pathetic little whimper. one hand flies between his legs, cupping his dick through his pants as his stomach and crotch and abdomen muscles flex.

his face has pure confusion. bliss. eyebrows furrowed, eyes crossed, mouth open.

he came so hard.

“wha— whaaat?” he whines, voice high. his hips twitch up into his own hand as ropes of cum flood his pants. he has tears pricking his eyes from how hard he came and how sudden and so not ready to. his hand is squeezing his twitching cock. that just came while soft. from a slap.

he’s never looked more pathetic or more adorable in his entire stupid life.

you stare down at him. “han. baby. i barely touched you.”

“i knowwww. i think i need new pants, ma—maybe new baaaaalls. y/n, can you slap me again but harder this time?”

you end up crouched in front of him, cradling his dumb flushed face while he keeps making little hiccupps, still gently palming his spent cock. he leans into your touch, nuzzling. dumbest fuck on earth. you’d keep him in a jar if you could.

now that we’re at a sexual topic, it deserves some recognition that seungmin is… surprisingly pathetic in bed. he talks a big game but the second he’s inside you he gets just… whiny. a lil flower, basically. “fuck— you’re so tight, gonna make me cum too fast again, shit—” he tries to stay confident and a mean cunt but ends up whimpering into your mouth, hips stuttering, begging you not to clench because he’s embarrassingly close. the dream boyfriend.

and about changbin, so we include all the four, he has stamina. like stamina. that man can fuck you for hours. (can, not always will. it’s only realistic that you tap out after about two rounds if not one.) then he’ll kiss every tear off your face and ask if you want another round “just to be sure you’re satisfied, baby :)”. insane. built different. (built himself to be different, he didn’t get those muscles and fat out of nowhere. he worked for this, let’s appreciate that)

anyways,

you watch them play sometimes from the safety of the couch(and by play you mean fists, wrestling, knives, guns), chin in your hands.

morons with weapons.

like minho has jeongin in a headlock on the living room floor. the others are doing their own shit around, they’re fine with anything as long as they can breathe your air in.

you watch them. they be rolling around on the floor trying to choke each other out and the second one of them senses danger near the crotch region their hips do that instinctive little squirm/twist away. protecting the goods. always protecting the goods. hips do that instinctive little tuck. ass clenching, balls drawing up, hiding. it’s so automatic. so fucking adorable.

the attackers are absolutely going for the sack on purpose because they know it would hurt them too.

men are sweet.

“quit guarding your little grapes, you pussy.” minho snarls, trying to knee jeongin in the balls while jeongin twists.

“my grapes are precious, you cum gargling— OW FUCK—”

felix once bit chan’s thigh so close to the balls that chan yelped. like imagine that scary ass psycho yelping. because he doesn’t usually yelp.

han knees seungmin in the nuts while giggling while playing tag. hyunjin will grab a handful of minho’s package mid grapple just to hear that cold motherfucker make a high pitched noise. changbin can always end a fight with shouldering into someone’s crotch.

can’t stress it enough, men are unique and funny and cute.

you were made for men.

not just any men, these men.

and oh, the way they come back to you. each get their little asses beaten by each other or get angry and destroy everything or get confused about their huge feelings for you, but since they know you’re safe, you’re y/n, they immediately come to you.

let’s start with chan’s baby ass(should fucking behead him) he’ll limp to you with fresh bruises, split lip, whatnot, and just collapse onto the bed or couch of yours. he just wants you close.

he lets you baby him then. enjoys it, wants it.

let’s go age order now, mkay? minho shows up covered in blood, silent, and just stares at you with those dead eyes until you open your arms. crawls into them. wraps himself around you in the weirdest positions, face buried somewhere on your body (neck, stomach, between your tits, wherever), and just breathe you in. for hours. that, calms him down.

changbin is the usual when he crashes down from their boy fights. after one of his big meltdowns he gets so guilty it’s painful. you can’t tell him enough times that it’s okay that he acts like this when he’s angry. he’s just a man. anyways, he’ll find you immediately, wrap those huuuuuge arms around you, and hang on you while you do whatever. he needs the reassurance that you still love him.

hyunjin will rest his head on your thigh while you play with his hair. he needs you. needs to find you. he yaps about how the world is empty and meaningless except for you. the FUCK is his problem. he needs your attention more than anything else. first boy or whatever.

han is… fuck, you already know, a dumb little bitch. like he got mad and did something stupid again. he’ll launch himself at you full force, wrapping around you, talking into your chest. same boy that tried to kill you once.

felix… aww. he comes back to you literally whimpering, covered in blood and whatever he was eating, and immediately tries to climb into your lap. baby, no, shower. after that, he’ll nuzzle into you and sometimes ask if you still love him. (he wouldn’t by himself, but he saw it on tiktok. also asks if you’d love him if he was a worm)

seungmin is a tsundere little bitch about it. done with his little blow up? start looking for you. crawling back to you. stomps around(with the exact movement a horse would) while hugging your arm only. grown ass man btw. you have to coax him into letting you clean him up. he’ll grumble the whole time (“i don’t need this shit”) but the second you kiss the bridge of his nose he goes boneless.

jeongin is such a personality. didn’t we already talk about him screaming into his pillow about you? well he acts like that didn’t happen, just finds you after to get relief, kneels on the floor, clings to your lap, sighing loudly, telling you in great detail how everyone is against him and how he suffered. you have to play along and kiss his “wounds” (even the fake ones) while he preens under the attention.

slut.

i mean him, not you.

never you.

that’s because they trust you this much. they’re also so fucking comfortable with you it’s actually insane.

and they expect you to be just as unbothered as they are.

example, you’re in your bathroom, brushing your teeth. the door opens(not a single knock knocked) and minho walks in without a word. steps up to the toilet, unzips, pulls his dick out, starts peeing. he doesn’t even look at you just stares at the wall. shakes off then tucks himself away. washes his hands and leaves. no big deal to him. meanwhile you’re standing there with your toothbrush hanging out of your mouth bc like ???

han will barge into the bathroom while you’re on the toilet just to show you something on his phone. he’ll stand there holding the screen in front of your face.

“han i am peeing give me two seconds”

“why?”

the other rock brained is felix. the empty headed little cannibal has walked in on you showering multiple times. you’ve had to start locking the door(though we already talked about them just fucking picking the lock then), and every single time he stands outside whimpering. (doesn’t remember he can literally pick locks)

you try to change shirts and jeongin walks in mid titty out. “oh don’t mind me, keep going.” you tell him to get out and he looks heartbroken. “but i’ve seen them before. why are we regressing as a society?”

changbin is horrible. fucking hell you think about him and have to hold your head in your hands. he’ll walk in while you’re changing pads and starts running his finger through your hair. “you cramping bad today, baby? want me to rub your tummy?” fucking horrible.

hyunjin sometimes sits on the edge of the bathtub while you’re soaking and read you something he wrote, completely ignoring the fact that you’re literally naked in the water. and if you dare tell him you need five minutes alone he’ll sit outside the door and monologue sadly about “the cruel walls you build between us” until you let him in.

seungmin will stand outside muttering “the fuck is the point of being together if i can’t even watch you wash your ass?” like y/n this is human rights violation. let him IN.

minho just… appears. you’ll be changing and suddenly he’s in the corner staring. no words. you undress to take a shower, turn to the shower, he’s standing inside. at the end of the day you get into bed, pull the covers down and he’s UNDER THEM.

how did he not kill you then if he’s THIS good?

felix, as we know, has zero concept of personal space or gendered boundaries. he’ll try to go into the shower with you “to help wash your back.” he’ll stick his cold hands up your shirt in the middle of the kitchen because “your tummy is warm and mine is cold.” when you tell him no he gets this heartbreakingly confused look. “but you let changbin do it, why not me? i love you too?”

chan is at least dada about it. he’ll come out of the shower with just a towel around his shoulders, everything else hanging out, and start making coffee like that. like okay wet daddy put that weapon away. and he tells you “what’s mine is yours, baby.” okay i take it back.

you whine one day that your boobs hurt, maybe pms, maybe han was too enthusiastic the night before, whatever, and chan reaches over, hooks two fingers in the collar of your shirt, and tugs it down.

just pulls your tits out into the open air.

he stares, few fingers poking at them, then tucks them back in and gives you a little forehead kiss. “they look fine.”

but when felix does the exact same thing two days later, it’s different!!

you’re on the couch complaining that your chest is sore and felix, who is very much not your boyfriend, is like “oh no!! let me see!!” and reaches over to yank your shirt down. full tits out in the living room while jeongin and minho are playing cards on the coffee table. you have to slap his hands away and pull your shirt back up while he looks… so lost. he genuinely doesn’t get why that’s crossing a line. to him, your body is community property because he loves you so much and he shares everything with the other seven boys.

they’ve seen you naked, fucked you (some of them), bled on you, cried on you, so why does the bathroom door need to be closed? why can’t they just walk in while you’re peeing? why can’t felix crawl into bed with you and han?

you close the bathroom door. han: “but why?? you’ve seen me naked before!! i’ve seen you bleed from the pussy!! why can’t i watch you pee???”

minho gave you the saddest stare when you told him you didn’t want company while you were changing a tampon.

and you’ve seen every inch of them (and they’ve seen plenty of you) so why the fuck would they hide anything?

because these boys are so comfortable with you.

take hyunjin, for example. you go over to their place one afternoon because he said he wants to show you this new painting he’s been working on. he leads you into his room, closes the door, and immediately starts stripping. shirt off. pants off. underwear too. your heart stops. his dick swings free for a second, soft, while he casually steps into clean boxers like. you’re not even there. your heart starts beating again.

he pulls his sweatpants up, grabs the painting, and turns around. “so what do you think?”

seungmin will casually scratch his balls while talking to you. full hand down the front of his pants, digging around, rearranging while he tells you about the guy he stabbed earlier.

you make a face.

he raises an eyebrow. “what? they itch.”

even better when he walks into your room completely naked, dick swinging, just out of your shower, and lies face down onto your bed. starfish. he’ll throw a leg over you and go straight to sleep while you’re trying to watch a show. if you complain he just “you’ve had it in your mouth, don’t act shy now.”

jeongin is tiring. you actually have to cry laugh. he’ll come up behind you while you’re cooking, press his morning wood against your ass(you’re fine with him doing this, he wouldn’t do it if it made the love of his life uncomfortable), and talks to you. “so then i was strangling the guy and his head turned purple and— waaaaaait, you’re not wearing panties under this? slut.”

“because i thought i was spending the night with changbin. where is he?!”

sometimes they?? switch?? places?? randomly??? like genuinely hyunjin walks into your bathroom and minho comes out. and hyunjin is nowhere. and there is no possible exit he could have gotten out on. or you send chan to the shop to get you something and felix comes home with it. then you think you’re talking to felix and when you turn around it’s hyunjin answering, two completely different voices mind you. you’re always so confused.

they genuinely don’t get it when you try to enforce boundaries. you’re their safe person. their person. so why would they hide basic bodily functions from you? it doesn’t compute in their boy brains.

underneath all the boundary issues is the fact that they trust you completely. that’s sweet though. they feel safe with you in ways they’ve never felt safe with anyone, only the others, but you’re different. so they offer you every part of themselves, the gross, the vulnerable, the naked, the soft dick, post shower, morning wood, post fight, post rage, post cry parts, without hesitation.

they all know, on some level, that women are more physically fragile. no sexism here, this is biology, though some of them know of it in the sexist way, some the biological. men and women are built different. standard knowledge. they’ve killed enough of both to notice the physical differences. they know your body is softer in places, more sensitive, bleeds differently, gets sore easier, boobs aren’t the same as pecs. they know you can’t just punch you in the arm like they punch each other. but the social boundary thing? the “this is my body and sometimes i want it to be private even from people i love” thing? can’t get it at all.

jeongin, hyunjin, changbin, and chan(chan respects you as his girl) are the ones who at least register the differences. they know boobs aren’t just funny squishy chest lumps like their own. they know periods suck and make you more fragile. they understand that randomly grabbing your ass in public might get them slapped while they can slap each other’s asses during fights and it’s just bro shit. they know girls need a little more… finesse. socially. emotionally. physically.

the others though, their brains simply do not… do not most of the time. they could understand if they tried, really could, but they simply don’t use those brain cells. well, the sunshine twins don’t, and minho and seungmin just don’t want to.

so you scold. they listen. sort of. for about three days. then han is back to trying to hold your tit in the middle of clothes shopping and felix is asking if he can sniff your armpit.

before you, there was nothing. we know that. now it’s just a big wobbly thing inside of them. love? terrifying. jealousy? torture. longing? makes them want to chew their own hands off.

their little hearts are really fragile right now.

and they relieve that by being quite the opposite on the outside. by murdering just as brutal as they used to. (crazy, the fact that they enjoy doing that)

chan has this weird little system that turns the feelings, the itch to kill inward first, then lets it go(aka murdering) when it’s a little more upset at him. bout to blow. he’ll go out, find someone who reminds him of his own insecurity, usually slowly, calmly choke them out while staring into their eyes. almost he’s having a conversation with himself. last time he came back with someone’s tongue in his pocket. forgot to take it out and you did when you were washing those jeans. you cried. he felt horrible.

feeling sad is also a new feeling. it’s heartbreaking. they actually feel bad for normal people because oh they had to live with this through their entire lives? but they mostly feel bad for you, because you also did. and you’re above everyone.

back to chan, he ends up lying down with you usually, needing you to give him any type of physical touch. but when he gets it he’s fine. (if we ignore his feelings fucking messing his system up)

about minho, when the feelings get too messy he goes out and does his cute little horror shit (keeping people alive for days, removing things slowly, enjoying their screams. he once kept a guy alive for twelve hours just so he could ask him philosophical questions about love while cutting out his liver piece by piece. then he came home, crawled into your arms, and stared at you for hours. you don’t even mind anymore. he your lil creep.)

changbin is unstable, just not (usually) in front of you. he caught someone looking at you wrong once and spent the next four hours breaking every single bone in the guy’s body. then came home, clung to you.

hyunjin suffers beautifully. little bitch always does. he’ll write twenty pages of the most heartbreaking shit about unrequited love, then go out and slowly take someone apart. he takes his time. makes it artistic. removes organs one by one while talking about the void you left in his chest(insert that talking to wall gif). babe(fucker) just needs you to let him rest his head on your chest.

han is dumb but evil. they all are, let’s not forget that. his brain can’t handle the new emotions so he always does shit with no clear purpose. last week he got jealous of chan taking you out and went on a rampage. caught some poor jogger, beat him unconscious, then tried to share the body with felix by playing tug with the intestines??? he came back covered in blood, tackled you onto the couch(you threw up). feelings are hard.

felix’s empty little brain wasn’t built for this much emotion. when it hits him he gets confused and restless and jealous(worse now that he knows what that is) and freaks out.

last week he got sad because you patted han’s head and he literally jumped at a random pedestrian in broad daylight, sank his teeth into the guy’s neck, and started eating him alive. blood everywhere. still managed to not get caught. tf. came home with blood in his hair and on his face and immediately pouted and crossed his little legs when you scolded him.

seungmin takes his emotional instability out on whoever’s unlucky enough to cross his path. the other day he was pissed because you smiled at changbin when you should have been making seungmin an omelette!! (still got it tf he pissed off about) he went out and found some random dude, tied him to a chair, and spent two hours explaining in great detail why the guy’s existence offended him while slowly peeling the skin off his arms like orange peels. slow. talking the whole time. “she smiled at him. smiled. you ever smile at someone that pretty? no? then shut the fuck up.” when the guy passed out from pain seungmin just slapped him awake and kept going???

he came home with blood in his hair and crawled straight into your lap. was relieved that you couldn’t see the blood in his dark hair but then you smelled it. he got outside time.

jeongin will have a childish breakdown. usually midkill, his lil(huge) ass sobbing about how you don’t love him enough while carving hearts into some girl’s chest. “do you feel this? this is what my heart feels like!!” he once begged you to tell him he’s pretty. it’s actually heartbreaking how undeveloped he is, we’ll talk about it more later.

they’re all so fragile now.

the new emotions are eating them alive from the inside.

they don’t know how to process love or jealousy or fear of abandonment. they don’t know anything, and especially not how to express it. they’re actually in a terrifying situation. especially for men.

hands constantly shaking. all eight’s.

but no matter how bad it gets, no matter how brutally they take it out on the world, they always come back to you.

always.

chan is the only one who sometimes remembers you have a name. he makes you feel like he could either pat your head or fire you without raising his voice. mostly he just nods when you hand him something, mutters “thanks” and keeps walking like you’re part of the wallpaper. one time he actually said “good job” after you fixed his in ear monitor in under ten seconds during soundcheck. you almost dropped dead from the shock.

lee know says maybe twelve words to you a day if you’re lucky. you hand him water, he takes it. you remind him something, he goes “mhm.” you accidentally bump into him backstage and he just sidesteps. you wonder if he even knows you’re the new assistant or if he thinks you’re just another staff member.

changbin is the only one who consistently doesn’t make you feel disposable. he always says “thank you so much” when you pass him anything. once you brought him his favorite hoodie you knew he likes and he looked at you like you hung the moon. “ah… really? you didn’t have to…” he still forgets your name sometimes but at least he tries. “you… the new one, right? sorry, what was it again?” cute fucker.

you want to kick hyunjin up. he’ll take the coffee you’re offering, and go “hm. a little cold already” like you personally pissed in it. you stand there wondering if you should spit in his next one. he’s not outright cruel, just lowkey evil in that hot way that makes you wanna smack him and also maybe climb him. he’s lucky you’re professional.

han seems to be fine by himself most of the time but says “thank youuu~” to you at leadt. pretty chill guy. doesn’t pay you much mind though. doesn’t pay much mind to anything.

felix manages a “oh, thank you” when you get him something but that’s mostly it. you swear he’s the only one who makes eye contact. lowk distant, not like you expected him to jump into your lap, just saying. you brought him throat candies once and he looked genuinely touched. “you noticed? ah, i’m sorry for the trouble.” bro you’re literally paid to notice.

seungmin doesn’t care much either. oh, staff, nice, gets me shit. helps me with shit. it’s their job, my job, that’s fine.

jeongin manages to thank you too, time to time. sometimes he’ll add a tiny “you’re fast” when you’re quick with something.

you hate working for them, to be honest.

just again, why would anyone expect these celebrities to be nice to you, but still. eye contact at least would be nice, dude. or dudes.

mornings are the worst. you’re running around with eight different demands at the same time. chan wants you to tell other people like, sixty things. hyunjin complains whatever drink he asked for is too sweet even though he didn’t fucking specify. lee know just takes whatever you give him and stares into the void. changbin thanks you three times. han acts hurt when you ask him something bc wdym he has to think when it’s your job. felix politely asks if you can find his missing earring. seungmin is on his phone all the time and jeongin is hiding behind his hood pretending he’s not awake yet.

when they’re not just rotting in the recording booths, you’re shoving water bottles, towels, monitors, this and that into their hands while they barely look at you.

“here.” “thanks.” “mhm.” “fuck, this cord is tangled again, who the hell—” (that’s seungmin).

hyunjin once threw his in ear back at you because it was “buzzing weird” and you caught it mid air. he actually looked surprised before going back to ignoring your existence.

but most of the time, you’re background noise. a pair of hands that brings things and fixes things and stays out of the way.

but just again, they’re not your friends and you do not expect them to be. they’re eight men in their twenties living in pressure all the time and they simply don’t have the energy to care about the new assistant beyond “does this person make my life easier right now?”

that’s fine with you. you get paid. you get to stare at handsome faces all day.

plus they’re all massive dramatic bitches when the stress gets too serious.

well, they never scream at you or anything, that would be unprofessional and they’re way too image conscious for that shit. but the passive aggressive energy? the tiny huffs? you want to strangle them.

hyunjin is like the final fuckass boss. you want to peg him just tor the way how he acts when something doesn’t go exactly his way. and not peg in the good way.

one morning you handed him his coffee and it had one too many ice cubes or whatever the fuck and he just stared at the cup.

“this again?” he muttered, then shoved it back into your hands without looking at you. “make it properly.”

later during rehearsal when his mic pack was acting up he actually clicked his tongue loud enough for you to hear and gave you that gut curling side eye like you invented technical difficulties yourself. bitch. you fixed it in thirty seconds flat and he didn’t even say thanks.

still, when he’s not in bitch mode he tolerates you fine. sometimes he even nods in your direction when he sees you. progress.

chan can get angry. “where’s the updated timing?” he asked you once, voice flat, like you were supposed to read his mind.

you scrambled, fixed it, handed it over. he took it without a word, scanned it, then just exhaled through his nose real hard.

the manly equivalent of slamming a door.

later he remembered to mutter “sorry, long day” but it still felt like you got lightly bitch slapped by responsibility.

you once brought lee know the wrong flavor of sum drink and he just looked at the bottle for five full seconds, then set it down slowly. he still takes whatever you give him most days and grunts “mhm” but on bad days that grunt sounds like it’s coming from the depths of hell.

changbin tries to behave, but he gets irritated at shit too. he’ll smile through it at first, “ah it’s okay…” but then he starts avoiding eye contact. not brave enough to actually point it out.

one time the stylists changed his outfit last minute and he had to wait for you to find the right shoes because it was put down somewhere. he stood there quietly for ten minutes, then very politely went “…it’s been a while, hm?”

you felt bad as fuck even though it wasn’t your fault. you got a thanks, at least.

han will still say thank you but it’s almost sarcastic. “thanks. really needed that.” said in a tone that implies he needed it five minutes ago. he wants you to be in place, you work for him after all.

felix stays fair at least. “it’s fine.” he’ll say. “just… next time maybe check twice?” you wanted to crawl into a hole and die. beautiful men should not be allowed to do this.

seungmin will take what you hand him, say thanks in the most neutral tone possible, and that’s it. says thanks but says it wirh the energy of thx.

sometimes he’ll just look through you like you’re not even there. one time you reminded him about something in twenty and he went “yeah i know” so flat you felt stupid for opening your mouth.

he’s not mean exactly, just… done. existing in his own bubble and you’re outside it.

jeongin will mumble thanks when you help him but if he’s stressed he gets his little attitude. “you sure this is the right one?” he asked once, holding up the wrong anything you accidentally gave him. made you feel so dumb. wanted you to feel dumb. then he smiled like he didn’t just lowkey call you incompetent. little shit.

still blushes when you catch him off guard though, so at least there’s that.

the days they’re huge bitches are usually the ones with back to back schedules, zero sleep, and zero breaks. you get it. so yeah, they snap a little. they get pissy. they sigh loud and click tongues and give you the cold shoulder.

but they don’t hate you, actually. none of them has ever complained about you to management or asked for someone else.

they like you enough not to make your life hell, but not enough to treat you like a person most days. you’re useful. reliable. that’s about it. you’re like any other staff, assigned a little closer to them, maybe.

you like watching chan lead them thru another flawless performance like he didn’t almost bite your head off six hours earlier.

men.

and it’s always, a l w a y s, y/n this. y/n that. y/n where is my nonstop. they’re on your dick 24/7.

“y/n.”

“y/n get me water.”

“y/n my in ear is messed up again.”

“y/n where’s the schedule?”

“y/n, hurry.”

even when they’re being bitches they still need you. especially when they’re being bitches.

hyunjin is your favorite to be honest. not because oh bias or anything, just because you actually kinda fuck with the way he’s like this. it’s like those female teachers loving the boys even though the boys are annoying and disrespectful.

“y/n. fix this.” he’ll say, pissy, shoving his half buttoned shirt at you. the stylist buttoned it for him perfectly before, mind you. fuck did he unbutton it for? bitch go tell the stylist this not y/n. (you did it for him)

one time he was in a full mood during rehearsal, everything was wrong, and he kept calling your name every thirty seconds. “y/n this light is too bright.” “y/n the floor feels sticky.”

you fixed it all but told him under your breath “then lick it cleaner, princess”

he actually heard you. you thought you were getting fired right there. wouldn’t even have minded it either, but he just gave you the deadest stare but didn’t say shit because deep down he knows he’s being a hoe.

when chan asks you to bring the this, the that, you bring it. two minutes later: “y/n, the pens?” you bring pens. five minutes later: “y/n—” you almost throw the whole fucking folder at his head.

lee know doesn’t even say full sentences anymore. just “y/n.” and then points at whatever he needs. water. towel. phone charger.

once he did the finger point while staring straight ahead.

you almost broke his finger.

you handed him the thing and he went “mhm”

changbin at least can get a nice tone on for FUCK’s sake. “y/n, sorry, could you get me the…?” it’s every ten minutes. you catch him looking a little guilty sometimes, mayb he knows they’re all overusing you, but then five minutes later he’s doing it again because his brain is fried and your help is nice.

han says thank you at least. he, compared to the others, lowkey leaves you alone. but that’s compared to the others. he still needs this and that and oh also—

felix really likes calling for you. sometimes he adds a tiny “sorry for bothering you again” but then asks for thirty things at once after that.

seungmin takes what you give him and barely look up, but god forbid you’re two steps too slow. he’ll just exhale hard through his nose. he’s on your dick just as much as the rest, just quieter about it.

“y/n…” jeongin mumbles at first, then if you take too long he gets this little smirk. “y/n, you sleeping or what?” he gon get his arm broken very soon, you’re capable of many things. whoop foreshadowing.

anyways, one time he called your name four times in a row because he couldn’t find his own fucking socks and when you finally found them he went “wow you’re slow today” you wanted to stuff the socks in his mouth.

you’ll be in the middle of fixing something on hyunjin(he’s a bitch but still lets you this close to him, says a lot tbh) and chan will call from across the room “y/n, timing?” and han will chime in “y/n i need my phone” and suddenly it’s a chorus of your name from eight different directions.

y/n.

y/n.

y/n.

yeah it’s not rare that you get called for from multiple directions at the same time.

take it when hyunjin and changbin both go y/n at the exact same second.

hyunjin’s voice is already pissy because his shirt collar is sitting weird. “y/n, fix this, it’s choking me.”

changbin is just as demanding but has a nicer tone to it. “y/n… sorry, can you pass me the throat spray? my voice feels off.”

you freeze for half a second while both of them stare at you expecting you to split in two.

hyunjin clicks his tongue. “well?”

you end up tossing the spray to changbin first because he was nicer about it, then you’re on hyunjin adjusting his stupid pretty collar while he looks down at you.

“faster.” he mutters. you want to bite his neck. not in the sexual way. you actually want to rip his veins out.

you two lowk like each other.

then chan. “y/n, is my laptop there?” lee know just lifts one hand lazily without even looking up. “water.” han is waving at you with that big smile that hides how tired he is. “y/n, my protein bar, the chocolate one!” felix raises his hand too “yo y/n, any chance you got my phone?“ seungmin next “y/n, mind grabbing me a coffee? black, thanks.” and jeongin is peeking from behind his phone. “y/n? can you check if my shoes are laced right? feels weird.” he could do it himself, mind you. he just likes to slave you around. all eight do.

all eight. at once. you’re one woman. you have two hands and one brain that’s currently dying.

when y’all have somewhere to be, every five minutes someone needs something. “y/n, my earphones are tangled.” hyunjin, pissy. “y/n, do we have any gum?” felix. “y/n, what time are we arriving again?” chan. lee know doesn’t even say your name, he just looks at you and you already know, water. han is the only one who adds a cute “please” most times, but even he piles on. changbin tries to be independent, at least. seungmin throws a “y/n, charger?” your way. jeongin entertains himself, he’s usually not that big of a problem when you’re out.

one night after a crazy schedule when all of them are quiet for once, changbin murmurs a “y/n, my neck hurts, any painkillers?” and “y/n—” “y/n—” “y/n, me too actually—” “yeah, if you have extra.”

you had to take the deepest breath. you’ll be a good mother after all this practice at least.

but let’s be real, after all this time and you not quitting, the hoes started to slowly trust you.

not in the let’s be besties way, but they know they can count on y/n.

they stop watching you like a hawk when you hold their phones. they leave expensive watches and half used shit on tables and don’t triple check if you moved anything. they even complain about managers infront of you sometimes.

they know you won’t fuck them over.

the biggest change happened because of chan.

it was genuinely a disaster of a night. everything went to shit. at 1:17am he pulled out his phone, texted you that he needs help with something. dorm if you can.

and you went because you’re a damn good assistant. security also let you through because apparently chan had already cleared it.

he opened their door in a black hoodie and sweats, hair so cute, looking equal parts grateful and dead. but he was really, really, really relieved to see you. “come in. sorry it’s a mess.”

it was messy, but sure, they’re men.

andyou spent the whole night at their tiny dining table with him. everything work related was on the table. chan was surprisingly open once the door was closed.

you even massaged his shoulders for ten minutes when he looked close to death. he kept muttering “thanks… seriously y/n” every hour or so. woah, gratitude we see there?

he really needed you that night. he needed the help he doesn’t usually take.

then jeongin’s little bitchass walked out of his room around 3:30am wearing nothing but black boxers, hair sticking up everywhere, half asleep and scratching his stomach.

he just gave you a lazy little slap on the arm as he passed. “hey, y/n.” he mumbled, walking weird(nothing happened, men just walk weird sometimes we know that), drank a huge glass of water, then casually walked back to his room.

your mouth went dry. he looked so hot.

chan just shook his head.

you powered through. by 6am chan had everything solid.

he told you to “go home. take the whole day off tomorrow— today. whatever. you earned it. i’ll tell management.” you tried to argue but he just shook his head. “no. sleep.” like okay dada.

each of the others had their opinions of this night, of course. most of the disagreement was pointed towards chan, not you. it was chan who let staff this close into their finally earned personal space, and you were just doing your job. but just again, this was most. the ones who think less in general, felix for an example, or seungmin but he does use his brain, those were the ones who did feel a little bit different about you.

but even they got over it because they have bigger shit to deal with.

plus… you’re actually fun to be around.

they realized that.

chan, after that all nighter, looks at you with actual respect. you’re not just staff anymore but someone who has his back, even though you’re doing it because you get paid for it.

“y/n, handle this for me?” and you do, because you’re reliable as fuck and he knows. you’re pretty much the only staff member who doesn’t make his head hurt.

then one afternoon you were sitting on a couch and… minho sat down next to you? like so next to you that his whole thick sidewas pressed up against yours. thigh to thigh, arm to arm, everything.

and he talked to you??? “i don’t like this schedule.” he muttered. “they keep adding shit. you notice that too?” you nodded like a dumbass and he kept going, complaining about this and that.

five whole minutes of lee know having a conversation while basically cuddling you on a tiny couch. you didn’t move. you didn’t breathe too loud. when he finally got up he just gave you one nod and left. your leg was asleep for twenty minutes after. men are disgustingly hot.

all because he saw that chan put trust in you.

changbin has straight up adopted you. he follows you around whenever he’s not needed, chatting about random stuff just to talk to you. other staff have literally gotten used to seeing the two of you walking side by side down every corridor.

you’re delivering papers? he’s right there beside you, chatting. you’re grabbing coffee for everyone? he tags along carrying one cup just to talk.

hyunjin started this disgusting new habit where he’ll stress eat half a fucking sandwich, or a granola bar, or some random pastry, then shove the sad remains straight into your hand.

“here. it’s yours now.”

one time it was a half eaten banana and he just pressed the mushy end into your palm while looking you dead in the eye.

“finish it.”

you stood there holding warm banana goo wondering how the fuck your life got to this point.

you were starving though. his saliva didn’t even taste that bad.

one night, like really late night when the others were still recording in the booth and you were sitting in the couch of that room, han just… sat in your lap??

“y/n, bounce me.”

so you kept talking to another staff member while you had your arms around the man and bounced your knees up and down. his ass was warm and heavy and every bounce made your thighs burn.

the unprofessional ever.

he enjoyed it though and that’s what matters. (this action will have consequences ahh)

one evening felix texted you saying he needed help with some paperwork shit at the dorm because he was too wiped to think straight. other staff usually deal with it for him but this time they shoved it into his hands and he had to take it home.

anyways. when you were there you made the mistake of saying “that shirt looks nice on you” professionally!!

felix paused, looked down at it, then just peeled it off right there, tossed it at your face and said “keep it.”

you caught it on instinct, fabric still warm from his body, and stood there holding a shirt worth a kidney.

seungmin usually keeps his distance but one night he was heading down to grab late night food for the boys. he asked the boys first, the usual, then turned to you. “y/n, you want anything?”

you stopped. seungmin remembering the staff exists? seungmin offering?

you muttered something about candy and he nodded, came back twenty minutes later with your little chocolate bar.

you’d been promoted from staff to lowkey pet.

some night you had to stand outside with some important smoking higher people while the boys were indoors, it was freezing. jeongin noticed from the window, disappeared for thirty seconds, then came out and draped his own jacket over your shoulders with a friendly smile. you thanked him hundreds of times but he just waved you off and went back inside. he jacket smelled like him. boy sweat, cologne, whatever detergent they use with chan. your mouth watered a little remembering the boxers incident. men make you feral.

as long as you’re around, shit runs smoother.

you’re just trying not to moan out loud when another one of them does something intimate while calling your name for the hundredth time that day.

fucking men. fucking hoes.

fucking unbelievable.

fucking sweet.

you’re back in chan and jeongin’s dorm again, way past midnight , because apparently “just one more hour of reviewing this” turned into “let’s camp out until the sun comes up.”

jeongin is already passed out in his room.

the whole situation screams unprofessional from every angle. you, sitting on the floor next to chan’s bed with your laptop balanced on your knees while he sits in his gaming chair, elbows on the desk, staring at his own screen.

the room smells like him. you like it.

you’re in your boss’s bedroom at 2am helping him work. assistant duties, sure. but still. hope we can all see what’s up.

chan rubs his eyes with one big hand and sighs. “y/n… you any good with this negotiation shit?”

you stretch your back. “yeah, i’m decent. learned a bunch from the last company i was at. act like you’re doing them a favor. also i’m good at reading between the lines on email tone, when they’re bluffing, when they’re actually pissed, that kinda thing.”

he nods, listening.

“honestly, i’m good at a lot of shit.” you say. “i know, uuh, spreadsheets, schedules, calming down people, giving killer blowjobs when the situation calls for it.”

the second the words leave your mouth your soul leaves your body.

you slap both hands over your face. “oh my god, chan, i’m so fucking sorry. that was disgusting. i was joking. i’m just exhausted, my brain’s not working, please pretend i didn’t say that. holy shit i wanna die.”

he stares at you for a second, then lets out this little surprised laugh, shoulders shaking a little. that whole combo looks good on him.

“fuck, okay. it’s fine, y/n. really. we’re both running on no sleep. don’t worry about it. shit slips out.” chuckling a little, eyes crinkling at the corners. “didn’t expect that one, though.”

you nod fast, mumble a “heh yeah mhm” face burning, wanting to disappear, and force your eyes back to your screen.

the silence that follows feels different than before.

minutes tick by. you’re both typing again, but the energy in the room has changed. bad. human energy. physical.

chan keeps glancing over.

then he clears his throat. “y/n.”

you look up. you know you’re going to get fired in this saint second.

“would you… be down for it?”

huh?

“down for what?”

he exhales through his nose, he can’t believe he’s saying this out loud. “the blowjob.” and immediately he leans back, hands coming up. “fuck, sorry, that came out wrong. i didn’t mean to make it weird, this is so unprofessional, i’m your boss basically, we’re both tired, this is crossing every line, i haven’t had any action in months and i’m tired, just forget i said anything—”

“sure.”

“sure?”

you swallow. “i mean… yeah. if you want. we can keep it professional. i’m offering to help because it’s my job. i don’t mind helping. really. like no weirdness after. or any attachment if that’s what you’re afraid of. just… relief. like the other stuff i do for you guys. we both know this stays between us.”

he watches you for a long time, searching your face. making sure you’re not fucking with him.

holy shiiiiit.

the leader in him is clearly fighting the man who’s been running on stress for months.

finally his eyebrows move lower on his face. he looks so good. “you sure? i don’t want you feeling like you have to. if it’s a hard no, say it. we go back to work and pretend this conversation never happened.”

you nod, setting your laptop aside on the bed. “i’m sure. we’re both adults. you trust me enough to let me in here. i trust you enough to keep it between us. it’s just… helping. professionally, i guess.”

chan rubs his face with both hands, then drops them, looking at you with disbelief. “fuck. okay. yeah. if you’re really down… that would actually be… shit, i don’t even know how to say it without sounding like an asshole.”

he shifts in the chair, the move making his sweats pull tighter across his lap. you don’t let your eyes drop there. not yet.

“i want to, chan. shut up and let your assistant help.”

“alright. if you’re sure.”

you nod, heart racing, moving toward him on the floor.

the air between you crackles with how fucking human and inevitable this whole thing is.

wait, no, i meant to say professional.

totally fucking professional.

he watches you approach, throat working as he swallows. hot. “y/n…”

“mm?”

“thank you. seriously.”

you smile, sweet, beautiful, even as you settle down between his spread legs. “anytime, chan. now relax and let me do my job.”

the laptop screen glows behind him, forgotten. for the first time in weeks, mr leader looks like he actually feels something besides depression.

you keep your voice to a whisper, soft and comforting, you’re so good at it. “it’s okay. you’ve been so wound up. let me take care of it.”

his eyes are locked on yours, and now you can actually feel them do something to you. you can already see the outline of him straining against the front of his sweats, tented up nice and obvious now, the shape of his cock pushing forward cuz it’s been trying to wave hello after you two danced around the idea for ten whole minutes.

you drag one finger in slow, lazy circles on the inside of his thigh. god, that’s a muscle there. up and down.

“that’s it.” you whisper. “just let it happen. you’re safe with me tonight.”

he lets out a low, shaky breath through his nose, thighs spreading wider. the outline gets thicker, harder, the head of him nudging more obviously against the fabric until the whole thing is basically throbbing there, begging.

you keep circling that finger, pressing a little firmer each time, watching the way his cock jumps every time you get close but never quite touch it yet.

when he’s fully hard, cock standing so stiff it’s almost pathetic how it strains the waistband of his sweats, a tiny wet spot already forming where the tip is leaking, you finally hook your fingers into the elastic. slow as fuck. you tug the sweats down his hips inch by inch, letting them bunch around his cute ankles. his boxer briefs come next, black and snug, the front stretched obscenely over the fat length of him. you peel those down too, careful, watching his cock spring free and slap up against his stomach with a soft, heavy sound.

and jesus fucking christ.

he’s big. not porn star ridiculous ofc, but real man big. thick, veiny, kind of cock that makes your mouth water. like wdym your boss has been packing this the whole time? the head is flushed, already shiny with pre cum beading at the slit. his balls are heavy underneath, drawn up tight from how turned on he is, nestled in a bush of dark pubes that get light when going up his pretty little stomach. makes your stomach flip.

“y/n… shit, i haven’t had time to, i’m not really shav—”

you press a finger to your lips, a soft shh, then slide a hand up his thigh and squeeze the thick muscle there, reassuring. “don’t. seriously. it’s fine. you’re perfect like this.”

you don’t mind. you expected it. this man barely has time to sleep, let alone shave his junk.

his eyes go wide.

hungry.

that little thing, you telling him he’s perfect just changed something in his dumb man brain and now he’s stupidly, suddenly attracted to you in a way that goes waaaay past professional relief. not just attracted, attached.

his cock twitches hard in the air between you, confirming it, another bead of pre sliding down the shaft.

you spit into your palm. lands loud in the quiet room. not so ladylike but after all it is, because you use it to wrap your hand around the base of him. slow. so fucking slow. feels so funny. in the hot way.

you stroke up from the root all the way to the head, thumb swirling over the leaking tip to spread everything nice and slick. down again, twisting your wrist a little, spreading your spit around, feeling the way his pubes tickle the side of your hand on every pass.

chan’s head falls back against the chair. he lets out these low little sounds. guttural might be the best word. a deep “mmph” when you squeeze tighter on the upstroke. a shaky exhale that turns into a quiet little groan when you drag your thumb right under the head where he’s most sensitive. his balls are basically in love with you.

you keep it slow, just learning the shape of him, the way his cock pulses in your grip, learning how he’s built.

work’s gonna be real difficult after this, knowing the exact shape of your boss’ cock, but whatever. now’s not the time to think about that.

another spit, right onto the head this time, and you spread it with your palm, making everything messy.

looks obscene. looks like him.

he’s leaking constantly now, precum mixing with your spit and dripping down over your knuckles.

you twist your hand on the way back up, firm, perfect, and chan’s hips jerk once, oh fuck he didn’t mean to, a “fuck”slipping out.

you keep going like that. long strokes. base to tip. tip to base. sometimes you pause at the head and just milk him with your thumb and fingers, watching more pre ooze out. sometimes you roll his balls gently in your other hand, feeling how full they are, how manly.

every sound he makes is quiet but real, that’s why it’s so hot, low grunts, shaky sighs, the occasional deep something in his chest that you can’t quite identify. his hands are gripping the arms of the chair.

you glance up at him every few strokes, catching the way his jaw clenched, eyes half lidded, so so so hot, and fixed on your hand working him, that beautiful face flushed and fucked up already.

he looks like he came six fucking times already and you’ve barely even started. he looks fucking gone. the outline in his pants was nothing compared to the real thing, big, heavy in your hand, twitching and leaking.

shit, like he hasn’t been touched in months.

chan lets out another quiet groan, hips shifting, moving up into your hand. his cock is flushed darker now, veins standing out, the head glossy and swollen. beautiful.

you squeeze his thigh again with your free hand, comforting, and he melts a little more into the chair, another “mmh…” escaping him.

you’re really fucking good at this.

you keep stroking him slowly and slick for a few more (torturous) seconds, watching his cock live in your fist, veins bulging, the head shiny and leaking. chan’s thighs are tense as fuck around you, muscles flexing in pleasure. his breathing is rough, the low grunts turning into shaky little huffs that he’s clearly trying to keep quiet because jeongin is still in the building.

you lean in closer, spit one more onto the tip. it lands and slides down the shaft, mixing with all the pre already dripping everywhere.

then you finally stop the foreplay.

you take him into your mouth.

the second your lips wrap around the swollen head chan has to take a biiiig breath, head tilted back, his mouth shut, teeth gritted.

you sink down fast, taking as much of his thick cock as you can in one go, lips hugging the girth. so snug. half his length disappears into your (hot, wet) mouth and you hollow your cheeks immediately, wow, sucking like you’re trying to pull the stress right out of his balls.

chan’s hand flies to the back of your head, then leaves it because he remembers you’re his assistant, and flies to the chair instead. his hips thrust up, chasing you, and you let him, relaxing your throat so another inch slides in.

his eyes actually cross.

the head bumps the back of your throat and you swallow around him, throat muscles struggling, but still milking the tip. spit is already pouring out the corners of your mouth, dripping down his shaft and soaking into the dark pubes at the base. you don’t care. you bob your head, then again, and again, sloppy and greedy(for your boss’ cock), gluck gluck gluck.

chan has to breathe with his mouth open to bear with the pleasure.

every time you pull back you swirl your tongue around the head, sucking hard on the sensitive underside before diving back down, nose pressing into his pubes on the deepest strokes.

it’s so obscene. so filthy. has that human smell that’s almost disgusting but more hot.

his balls are right there, heavy(makes him even hotter in your eyes), so you reach up with one hand and roll them gently, fingers slipping through the soft hair covering them, tugging, massaging, making his cock jump in your mouth.

the sounds he’s making are pure porn.

“y/n… fuck— y/n—”

music. to. your. fucking. ears.