ScatteredSoul

The feeling of sickness when something real bad happens with you and your loved one . It's excruciating. It's the kind of pain you cannot see on the outside but on the inside it causes you to fester . It eats you alive. That agony drowns you and even when you know how to swim through it all you just sink because what's the point of anything anymore ? A pit in my stomach , an ache in my heart . It dwells deep within me the memories of our past that I wish had last ... Why did we part ? Maybe to become painful, painful art . Art that flows through my words my thoughts, my whole being is consumed by this hurt ,this pain . It was so special how could I let it all go in vain ? So I let myself feel it all and drain me again and again because to love and to be loved might never happen again...

Feels like I had it all a while ago and now it's all gone in the blink of an eye . It's all gone in the depths of pain and agony . So deep that I don't know if what's gone will ever be found . But the grief haunts me all the same and keeps me awake staring at ceiling, the deep red horizon, the moon , the stars and the hues of blue sky and I run out of breath in panic thinking of what I have lost might never be found untill I am finally buried deep in ground , my bones withered , my soul feathered away to a place far beyond where I would finally be one with all that's lost and couldn't ever be found.