LATERS, BABY.

Today I said goodbye to somebody who meant the most to me. I mean yeah maybe he wasn’t great for me and maybe I do deserve better. After three years of going through hell and back together, each goodbye hasn’t seemed final, it hasn’t seemed real because deep down I knew that person was always going to be there for me, I knew that good bye wasn’t actually goodbye and that I’d always have that person to fall back on. I officially met this person when I was 15, I remember damn near every moment, good or bad. As stupid or naive as this may seem for my 18 year old self to say and my 16 year old self to have thought from the moment I got to know him, I alway imagined that person being in my life for the rest of my life. I’ve had my chances to find other people but there was nobody I could have imagined being with, nobody I could imagine doing everything we did. The amount of respect I got from him was amazing, from wanting to take things slow, from dealing with my anxiety, to waiting until I was ready for each next step we took. Over the passed 3 years I have learned so much, I have learned what love is and what it isn’t... it sucks to know that I have lost that. Yesterday I had my last interaction with this person, sadly I didn’t think it was the last time so I treated it like it was nothing and I held my grudge. Now I regret it but it’s something I can’t change. This has all taught me not to be angry or petty or sad but it has taught me that even if what you have may be worth fighting for, letting go although it may sound hard and although it may seem impossible sometimes it’s better. Sometimes you have to close the chapter in your life from the person that holds something so meaningful and something so special to you and you have to find yourself. Realize what is best for you.