steve rogers is a punk ass bitch

Plus there’s this bit from the animated series:

I’ve been seeing some willfully obtuse shit regarding this where Marvel fans essentially ignore that Peter stole traits from Miles’ origin and story. So here is the list of the ways it was done.

1. Ganke Lee/Ned Leeds

Of course, I had to start with the most obvious.

Not only that he looks like Ganke, but he fucking acts like Ganke. Has Ned Leeds been Asian before? Yes, in Spectacular Spider-man Tv Show, but it would be hilarious that Disney and Sony actually stole from Greg Weisman after they both collectively screwed him twice. The thing about this character is that he acts more like Miles’ Ganke than he does Peter’s Ned Leeds.

Peter’s Ned Leeds was never a close friend of Peter’s, let alone went to the same school as Peter. He was an acquaintance at best or a fellow work mate at the most. 

Ganke, however….

..Is Miles’ best friend. He was introduced in Miles’ second issue ever. He has been a constant character ever since. That is Miles’ number 1.

If you noticed that Ganke was playing with Legos, guess what hobby Ned Leeds’ favorite hobby is?

That is a Lego Deathstar. And before you say, well in the panels’ he’s just playing with it. He doesn’t seem that interested in Legos.

And why Legos are integral to Miles and Ganke? Miles is not as Science smart as Ganke or Peter Parker so he cannot remake the Web fluid. Ganke is that smart and Legos are suggested by Chemists as great toys children to play with because it helps them visualize molecular models. Ganke is as important to Miles’ Spider-man as he is to Miles.

For all intents and purposes, Ned Leeds probably is just his best friend on account of Peter not telling Ned Leeds that he is Spider-man. Speaking of which, the whole Peter having a confidant in on his identity situation…

He never had one. Peter never told anyone that he is Spider-man. He never once shared that info with Gwen Stacy, Mary Jane(she always knew, but never revealed that she knew), Harry Osbourne, or anyone. In Ultimate Spider-man, Peter did confide in Mary Jane, but that was a case of her being his only friend.

Miles only revealed his identity to Ganke and eventually his father.  Well in the case of Ganke, Miles never had to reveal anything because Ganke was there to help him become Spider-man. It just the scene how Ned leeds found out.

Look familiar?

The same parallel as Peter’s.

Also, Ganke is girl obsessed like Homecomings’ Ned Leeds is. And yes, you are a little too infatuated with the opposite sex if you know by heart what a woman has worn previously and what she hasn’t.

The first thing Ganke does when Jessica Drew presents Miles with his new costume is to declare that he will start talking to girls.

After a deep conversation about what to do with Miles’ thieving ass Uncle, Ganke is pressed to go with Miles’ not to provide comfort, but to stare at his mom(who is really attractive).

As soon as he meets Mary Jane Watson and Gwen Stacy, Ganke immediately switches gears and starts hitting on them.

Ganke making a gift out of Legos for Gwen Stacy.

And it working…

Ganke trying to use Miles to hook him up with Dagger, and refusing to believe anyone is too hot for him.

Ganke is girl obsessed. It’s part of his charm.

So Peter took Miles’ best friend. Great.

2. Miles motivation of proving he is a superhero

I remember when I called this out and some moron said Peter had to prove himself to the Fantastic Four in his debut. No.

He wasn’t trying to prove himself with the Fantastic Four. He wanted to join the Fantastic Four so he can earn money.

The FF did not have an opinion on him, except Ben who did not like Spider-man for being a show off like Johnny. 

Just for your closure…

Miles’ however, had to go through a proving ground to not just be Spider-man, but also be qualified as a hero.

Instead of Tony Stark being the one supervisor of Miles, it is Captain America. It’s a long story as to why Cap feels the need to restrict Miles, but he is the one Miles has to prove his worth to.

After fighting with Captain America, Miles pops the question.

And to tie it into the Civil War, Miles’ asks to be the Ultimate equivalent of the Avengers, the Ultimates.

This is not a coincidence. You may say that they needed Peter to join MCU somehow, but how they are going about it is eerily similar to how they went about it with Miles. Peter never once had to gain recognition from his fellow superheroes. He never once had to ask to join the Avengers because they respected him as a hero. Miles’ did.

This is not the first time Peter took this from Miles either. The Ultimate Spider-man cartoon has Peter,again, taking Miles familiarity with Nick Fury and forming a super team just like Miles Morales. It’s annoying.

3. Younger Aunt May/Parental figure and having stability

Before I start this, yes, Ultimate Spider-man had a younger Aunt May and Uncle Ben. I know this. You seen her above when she is talking to Miles and you see her when Gwen kissed Ganke. But she did not look like this.

Now Marissa Tomei is a young looking 52 year old woman. Girl fucking looks good. Slay.

But Ultimate Aunt May did not look like she was pulling dates off tinder. Ultimate Aunt May also did not stay in an upscale Queen suite. Peter was not raised in an economically stable environment. There was always bills to be paid and Aunt May did not work.

Miles however lives in Brooklyn. His mom is a nurse and his father a cop. It is a stable household.

As you can see, Rio is hot!

Anyways, what contributed to Peter’s anxiety and neuroticism was that he never had a stable household. They were always just above the red. With Ben gone, Aunt May had to take care of the household in spite of Peter’s new adventures.  Peter is lower middle class. Miles’ is middle class when it comes to living in Brooklyn.

4. The charter school

This especially pissed me off. 

Miles goes to an advanced charter school for gifted children. How he did so?

You ever see the documentary, “Waiting for Superman?”

Okay, so there is a literal lottery for gifted urban youth(usually youth of color) for them to attend advanced schools. If they do not get the right lottery, then they are sent back to attend the shitty Inner City schools where they most likely won’t excel in life. They will most likely excel if they go to Charter School. It sucks, but that is a reality youth face.

Miles had to enter this lottery to attend his charter school(with the number 42, Jackie Robinson’s number to mark the significance). Peter has never been placed in a situation where his race and environment did not cheat him out of a future or reduce his options. His intelligence has always gotten him out of academic situations and guaranteed his success. Miles had to enter a fucking lottery to ensure his future was stable. And that is highly fucked up that Peter just took that trait from Miles without the significance of it being appreciated and realized.

That is four things that Spider-man: Homecoming leeched from Miles Morales and his story. And people want to act dumb as if these characteristics have always been attributed to Peter. Bull fucking shit. They wanted a relative character that was not presented on screen or the audiences did not already know. They exhausted Peter’s story, characters, and even abilities through 5 movies, several cartoon, and several video games and a fucking live action play. 

What pisses me off is that people have called Miles the inferior Spider-man or not the real Spider-man, yet Peter, this motherfucker, is literally taking aspects from Miles and no one is calling it out. You love everything about Miles when it is on a white character, huh?

It is also an aspect of Marvel canabalizing off of legacy characters. DC gave Wally a chance to be the Flash over Barry Allen. DC gave several Robins a chance and did not create an amalgamation of Robin. DC gave Jon Stewart a chance ahead of Kyle Rainer and Hal Jordan. Fuck, Marvel you gave Scott Lang a chance over Hank Pym in spite of making Hank Pym’s main villain the villain of Avengers 2(And Hank Pym fans did not deserve that). 

We heard every excuse in the book as to why Miles could not be the first to enter MCU when Peter’s story has been told 5 fucking times on screen.  Miles Morales was trending when it was announced that Marvel was making a Spider-man film. People wanted his story to be told. And we heard every excuse in the book as to why Miles could not be selected. There was fucking press release that basically said Peter Parker had to be white yet you don’t mind diversifying the rest of the cast. We heard that his story was too new, but that did not stop you from making Robbie Reyes the new Ghost Rider. That Miles is a legacy. Yet you made Scott Lang, the legacy to Hank Pym, the first Ant Man on screen while acknowledging that Scott Lang is the second Ant Man. You just did not want him on screen because Miles is not white. End of story. You liked his story so much that you attributed to Peter. You took his cast. You took his financial situation. You took his precarious school situation. You took one of his arc. And you gave them to Peter. By doing that, you all but ensured that Miles would be stuck in his comic book and not being getting a damn thing.

his favorite is the first run of the comics. he actually seen the first year of their release so theyre familiar and easy and oh so fucking corny. he likes reading them with bucky and showing them to sam and making fun of the blatant advertising they do

HATES THE RADIO SHOW he listened to it all though. hes blown away that the entire world thinks he banged peggy and how that is considered common knowledge. thinks its funny bc he knows without being told that she mustve HATED the show

less into the second run of captain america comics. bucky somehow becomes twelve and his sidekick and he reads a really interested article about how his comic run ties into mccarthyism and the push to rebrand him as an all american hero. buckys reboot was to make their relationship come off as less homoerotic. sam and nat wont stop qouting the corny lines from it and catch phrases

the first tv show is BAD. he cringes throughout the entire thing. very bad special effects and random moments of trying to teach a lesson. his actor looks NOTHING like him.

the series of short clips where they use his image to talk about stranger danger and drug use are EXCELLENT although at times a bit racist. bucky knows all the lines and acts them out with nat

speaking of racism the cartoon clip of captain america rapping about how no matter the color of your skin we are all kin? AMAZING. the 80s were a great time. sam sets it as his ringtone. steve hates it.

the edgy reboot comic of captain america in the late 80s were awful and steve hates them. they try to reimagine his character as more morally gray and he impregnates a woman. he hates them and for some reason he has a gun and no shield. he reads a good buzzfeed thinkpiece about how this was a huge fuck you to the comic code to try and break into dark edgy territory but the use of violence against women shouldnt be the metric for such. he now finally understands why there was a brief moment in feminist history where they hated captain america.

the many many erotic romance novels based off his torrid love affair with peggy. he denies that he read more than one but he has a kindle with them and theyre AWFUL and he CRIES

three part movie series in the 90s of an overly campy captain america? bitch fuck yes. they LOVINGLY sculpted his ass and he has no less than two lovers per movie. theyre awful and bucky somehow becomes a plucky 13 yo latino youth in it. steve cant sit through it all and bucky hates it which means sam and nat LOVES it

EARLY 2000s CARTOON NETWORK RUN OF KID CAPTAIN AMERICA? FUCK YES. PEAK CAPTAIN AMERICA AND ONCE AGAIN HE RAPS ABOUT RACISM. nat sam bucky and steve all STAN

a handful of biographies written over the years. he only vaguely leafs through them because he thinks theyre boring but he gets mad when they get random facts wrong. apparently its common knowledge that he had a girlfriend at age 18 that he just did not fucking know about but OKAY

2006 anime series based off of the captain america comics is a trip and he didnt understand ANY of it but there were A LOT of tiddies. nat loves it.

they watch a youtube compilation of captain america themed commericials over the years and apparently steve has endorsed everything from war bonds to pampers to viagra

he gets BIG MAD about his image being used for conservative propoganda and anti gay marriage campaign and actually spends a few weeks sending cease and desist claims of copyright about these malicious usages of his brand.

then there’s his weird characterization that makes him look like a dick the entire movie. him wielding mjolnir doesn’t save him from the fact that a truly good person wouldn’t ditch all their friends to go back to an idealized past. from the beginning of the movie he’s obsessed with peggy in a way that’s so fucking creepy. he doesn’t care that bucky and sam just died or that he just watched bucky die right in front of him for the second time. he’s too preoccupied with the weird compass to care about anything that actually matters. steves not a man out of time anymore he’s been living in the present for 12 years by 2023.

also im so tired of seeing people say that we should be happy that steve got his happy ending and that steggy has been foreshadowed in every cap movie because it’s just not true. steve was moving on from the past in catws. he even lists off things he likes about the present. steves happy ending had to happen in the 21st century because that was the only way to show how his character has developed since 2011. him going back to the past and living through every tragedy that happened over 70 years and doing nothing about it isn’t a happy ending it’s a goddamn nightmare for a character like steve who can supposedly “do this all day”. in what world is he happy just sitting back watching conflict after conflict and war after war go on. and steggy absolutely was not foreshadowed in every cap movie he made out with her NIECE after her funeral and had already asked sharon out before he even knew who she really was but she turned him down. markus and mcfeely called peggy just a girl steve had kissed because they wanted to hype up staron. peggy told steve she lived her life and wanted him to move on. if it had been foreshadowed that much, it wouldn’t have been shoved into endgame every 20 minutes because the audience would’ve already known she was “the love of the his life” instead of having to be reminded of it constantly so his ending didn’t seem forced. if the reaction to sharon hadn’t been so unnecessarily negative, i can promise you that she would’ve been with steve at the end of the movie

Steve, Internally:

Like in what universe would Steve Rogers be able to stand by while his best friend/brother was brainwashed and tortured for decades!! How would he be able to stop himself from helping, Howard his friend, how would he let Peggy run SHIELD knowing it was HYDRA???? How many atrocities would he sit by and let happen all so that he could be “happy” the man who was always fighting against injustice even when he was sickly and dying.