This Guy Botherinโ You, Sweetheart?
Husband!Frank x Wife!Reader
Summary: Your new coworker causes problems between you and Frank. You canโt figure out whyโyouโre nothing special. But when drinks at the bar prove you wrongโฆ the night ends in blood.
masterlist | tag list open. Comment or DM a ๐ to be added, 18+ only, age must be in bio.ย
Warnings: slow burn conflict to violent explosion, threats,ย detailed violence, blood, jealous!Frank, protective!Frank, negative self-image/imposter syndrome/negative self-talk & self-worth, manipulation (not Frank), sexual innuendoes, implied fingering, attempted drugging (not Frank), fuck ton of cussing, power plays, mentioned death of an animal (trust me, youโll see, itโs not sad).ย
A/N: I kept Frank as still being semi-active as The Punisher. My personal opinion: Frank would not do the job if married. He loves you too much to put you in unnecessary danger. HOWEVERโฆ itโs hot as fuck so thatโs my reasoning. Pics from Pinterest, not mine.Reader is always 18+. Minors do not interact.ย Tag list is open for 18+. Asks open for Frank.
Frank can smell bullshit the way a shark smells blood: one drop, a quarter mile away.ย
Shitโs not close enough to see yet, but it fuckinโย stinks.ย
A cool breeze whistles through the crack in the window as the rain patters down, crisp ozone and wet tarmac in Frankโs nose. Night settles in; so consuming itโs comfortable. Maybe itโs the anticipation of waiting forย you.ย His girl, gettinโ offย her shiftย to get inย his car,ย get you back homeย safe, drive you through that coffee joint for a chai latte and a coffee just to drag it out longer. Windshieldโs speckled, raindrops streaking, but heโs still got a clear enough view. Woulda been out there waitinโ for you, but last time he did, you said you loved the rain and the run to the truck. Soโฆ he stays put. Gives you whatever simple pleasure he can.ย
The seat creaks under Frank as he adjusts, elbow on the console, chin in his hand, eyesย fastenedย to the door youโll be cominโ out of. Totally casual. Boot totally notย taptaptaptaptappingย in the footwell. Van off, artillery in the back; the unsavory pieces Frank isnโt scared to show you anymore.ย
Started stinkinโ six weeks ago. Notย yourย bullshit.ย Jasonโsย bullshit. Your new clean-cut, savvy-tongued, personal ass-kissing coworker. Started small. Innocent enough. Frank knows better.ย
A text on your phone during dinner guyโs first week.ย Frank raised a brow in question, fork left hovering in front of his mouth.ย โSweetheart, that guy botherinโ you?โย
You raised a brow at your screen, then your expression neutralized. You blink across the table at Frank. โHim? Oh, god, no. Heโs been a breath of fresh air.โย
โฆBreath of fresh air. You hear that shit? Christ.ย
โNew guy at work just has questions. Normal stuff.โย
โQuestions canโt wait until work hours?โ Frankโd asked, voice smooth through the lurch of instinct in his chest.ย
โEh, heโsโฆย trying,โ you reason, โto get up to speed. You know how it goes being new.โย
Then the phone calls. He ainโt even subtle.
You walked in the apartment humming acknowledgment, phone sandwiched between your shoulder and cheek while someone else gabbed. When you did answer, it was respectful. Tasteful, nothinโ out of the ordinary. That amicable professionalism Frankย dotesย on, hearinโ you talk all smart, talk your shop. Youโd chime in, small cues you were home. Polite excuses to get off the call. Didnโt work.ย
Frank cornered you against the countertop, hands planted on either side so his barrage of affection was inescapable. Soundless, youย laughed, squirming in the cage of him as Frank nipped your neck, kissed your jaw, muttered nothings about gettinโ you a bath ready, askinโ if you taste as good as you smell, pressinโ about your dayโฆ so when youย didnโt reciprocateโฆ when youโstill laughinโ, still smilinโโturned awayย to give attention to the damn phone callโฆ Frank knew exactly who stole your attention, knowinโ damn well youโre home. And itย pissed him the fuck off. Not pissed at you. Christ, no. Never you, his sweet angel. Pissed the fuck off at the guy callinโ a married womanโFrankโs girlโafter hours, keepinโ you on the phone โabout workโ until night came around and Frank suggested, in good nature, you needed sleep.
Frank didnโt sleep much that night. When he did? He dreamt about reachinโ through the receiver to crush Jasonโs windpipe.
The double-doors unlatching retrieves Frank from his thoughts. Automatic, he sits straight, heart stuttering the second he sees you walking out into the night rain. Wind catches your hair, tugs your jacket, but when you look up through the needles of rain? See him there, the van?ย Jesus, heโs gone.ย Delight lifts you up. Puts a skip in your step,ย literally. You beam. Smile. Wave like you ainโt seen him in weeks even though he kissed you goodbye that same morning.ย
Frank rolls the window the rest of the way down. Leans out the side, elbow hooked out, squinting against the weather. Gives a whistle, looowโn slow, goddamn obnoxious as the commoners settle and the city comes to life with rats.ย
โHey, sweetheart,โ Frank calls across the lot. โNeed a ride, huh?โย
Youย laugh,ย keeled a bit, shoes staggering a step. God, that sound fucks with a manโs common sense. โYeah!โ You call back, playing into it. โI need a ride. You got a seat?โย
โYeah, princess, I got a seat alright. Wanna learn how tโdrive this bad boy, huh?โย
โFrank,โ you shout back, weak from laughter, โitโs anย automatic transmission.โย
โSweetheart, youโre supposed tโplay along, not use that beautiful brain โa yours.โย
You dash the rest of the way with a wild grin.ย
Frank reaches over and pushes your door open so you can barrel in.ย
The van rocks as you catapult yourself into Frank, lips crashing into his. Your mouthโs cold on his, sweet from whatever you were drinkinโ, soft from the chapstick you canโt survive without.ย
Frank knows he wonโt make it into Heaven, but godย damnย you taste like it.ย
Breathlessly sweet, you pull back first, an arm hooked around Frankโs neck as best you can in the confined space. You nudge your nose against his, cold to warm, heart tripping as the best part of your day nears. โChai latte time?โย
โHell yeah, baby,โ Frank rumbles, his hand splayed over the entirety of your lower back. โChai latte time.โย
โYes!โ And after another quick, planted kiss of appreciation that conjures a groan in his throat, you plop back into your seat.ย
But as Frank shifts the van into drive, foot on the brake, he feels your excitementย diminish. Craning his head over, he sees youโhis girlโa wry smile, a hand on your stomach like youโre full.ย
โWellโฆโ you start, โmaybe aโฆย decafย for me.โย
Frank gawks. โYou feelinโ alright, sweetheart?โ Pressing the back of his hand to your forehead. โThey workinโ you too much in there, huh?โย
You breathe a dismissive laugh, guiding his hand down. โIโm fine, Iโm fine. Promise.โ You tip your head against the seat, smile all soft. โI had a chai already. I donโt think I need anymore caffeine before bed.โย
You. Already had a chai. From somewhere in the vicinity. Frank blinks. You hate the chaiโs in the vicinity. Frank specifically drives you twenty minutes outside of town to get the chaiย you like. Every damn night, Monday through Friday, rain or shine. Before he can get the question out, you answer.ย
โJason and I got called out for a meeting on the other side of town. He mustโve remembered I mentioned you and I go there every night after work, that itโs our thing. It was on the way back,โ you explain. โHe wouldnโt take no for an answer.โย
Frank. sees.ย double. Knee-jerk reaction, Frank double-stomps the brake, his stunย movingย the truck. Guy drives a married woman to the place sheย shares with her husband, buyinโ the same fuckinโ drink he gets her every night? Guy buys the married girl the drink before her husband canโthatโsย the bullshit.ย It fuckinโ reeks.ย
You shift, sensing the fizzling tension radiating from Frank. โโฆWhat?โ you ask, quiet, like anything too loudโs illicit.ย
Low, a promise to make itย known: โHe know youโre married?โย
Brows knotted, then lifting up, you waggle your hand at him, ring catching in the distant streetlamp light. โYou made it pretty hard to miss, Frank.โ You pause, eyes narrowing as you study him; the impossible person youโve managed to learn, love, and keep. โโฆWhy?โย
โHe ainโt actinโ like youโre married.โย
โWhat?โ You sit forward, knees angled towards him. โThatโs ridiculous. Heโs just a nice guy, trying to make friends. He does these things for everyone.โย
โWork ainโt fโfriends.โ Frank immediately hates saying it, regrets the low-drip of spite thatโs got you tensinโ your shoulders, face twisting in pure confusion.ย
โFrankโฆโ your tone to reason.ย
Hereโs the problem:ย ya donโt see it.ย
Rain pelts the windshield. Heavy, angry spit from the sky.ย
He shakes his head, almostโฆย solemn. โDonโt get it, sweetheart, do ya?โ
โGetย what?โ With a red-mottled face, panic bouncing in your veins. โIโm so confused here, Frankie. I donโt- Iโm not sure what Iโm supposed to beย getting.โย
Frank leans an arm on the center console. Waves you in close with his other hand.ย
Like the two of you are magnetized, you follow, leaning your chin in his palm, your eyes searching between the both of his for answers.ย For clarity.ย
โBabyโฆโ Frank drops his voice the way he does when he needs understanding without proof. Itโs a big ask. Frank knows. Frank knows you trust him, too. And you knowโtrustโFrank wonโt lead you in the wrong direction.ย
The rough pad of his thumb slides slow strokes over your cheek, his dark eyes holding yours. โGuy ainโt doinโ this shit for the right reasons,โ Frank says. โAinโt doinโ it โcause heโsย nice, or-or trynaย make friends. Nah. Guy knowsย exactlyย what heโs doinโ. Heโs tryna weasel his way tโya. Playinโ nice, playinโย dirty, yeah? Guys ainโt nice tโpretty ladies fโthe hell of it.ย He ainโt a good guy.โย
Your lashes falter as you process, mouth circled in disbelief. Wind howls through the seams of the truck, nullifying the silence. โYouโreโฆ deducing that from whatโฆ? Aย tea?โย
โEverything. The texts. Calls. Keepinโ you late at work. Buyinโ you shit like that, yeah?โย
โNoโโ your head glitches a shake, hesitant at first. โNo. Thatโs not itย at all, Frank, oh my god. Thatโs- thatโsย ridiculous.โย
Thunder roars like distant bombs. Lightning draws a jagged white fissure through the sky.ย
Frank grimaces, pressing his mouth into line. โAinโt ridiculous. Itโsย right, sweetheart. You need tโstay away from that guy, you hear me?ย Away, before he does somethinโ Iย reallyย donโt like. You need me tโtalk to him, huh? Give a gentle nudge?โย
โApproach Jason and threaten him over work and tea?โ You shake your head, exasperated by being in the middle of such absurdity. Ferocity of your truthโthe false belief youโre never enoughโin your eyes, you pin Frankโs stare. โYou haveย nothingย to worry about.ย Iย have nothing to worry about.โย
โYeah?โ His brows lift in a goad. โWhyโs that, huh?โย
โBecause Iโm not specโโ
Your phone cries and vibrates on the dash like a wasp.ย
You startle, eyes snapping to the phone.ย
Franks clocks it with a vile glare.ย
The airย constricts; a noose around both your necks.ย
You hesitate, heart in your throat, stomach an empty pit.ย
Jaw pulsing, expression emptyโthe preamble to violence against another manโFrank stares out the windshield with darting eyes. For five long seconds, you donโt see Frank. You seeย The Punisher. You see what manโs capable of, if pushed too far; if whatโs his is threatened.ย
Eyes on Frank, you slink your arm out to silence the call.ย
Softer, barely a whisper, you say, โNeither of us has anything to worry about, okay? Iโm not specialโโ
The phone clicks to black.ย
โItโs notย bullshit, itโsย true. You donโt have to blow smoke up my ass like Iโm not the mostย averageย person youโve met,โ you bubble an incredulous, pained laugh.
โBull-shit.โ Frank argues, twisting to drillย his truthโthe truthโinto you, head-on. โDonโt youย everย say that shit โbout yourself, sweetheart, youโre theโโ
A second time. Your phone buzzes aย frenzy, incessant and disruptive,ย deafeningย in the space between you and Frank. Goosebumps race up your arms, like an augury to whatโs to come. Not now, but later.ย
โI- I need to answer that,โ you say, voice thin.ย
Reluctant, at a loss, Frank throws a nod at it.ย
You swipe to answer, phone to your ear with a tight, โHello?โ
Frantic nonsense on the other end. Nothinโ Frank can hear. He can, though,ย feelย your anxiety spike. An innate sense tailored to you, Frank slowly turns his head in your direction. Watches you pale, fear zigzagging your eyes.ย
Thereโs no fight in him when youโre lookinโ like this. Impatient for answers but quiet, Frank leans over the console. One big hand kneads over your thigh, keepinโ you here, with him. Whatever it isโyou ainโt alone. Not with Frank around.ย
โOh my god,โ your gasp wanes to a halt, eyes round with shock. โOh-oh my god. Okay! Okay, yes. Yes, lโll be right there! Just- just give me a few. Okay? Yep. Yes. Bye.โย
The phone slides from your ear. You donโt even realize itโs dropping until Frank grabs it. Sets it in your lap. Kneads a little firmer into you.ย
โEverything alright, sweetheart?โ Dumb question, but he needs to pull you back into focus.ย
โUmโ uh-haโฆย no.โ
Frank braces, steady inhale through his nose. โTalk tโme.โ
โWe, uh- Me and-ย yeah. We have a presentation tomorrow. Likeโย bigย presentation, Frank. Like,ย could be a promotion and a raiseย big.โย
โYeah, alright. I remember, baby. What about it?โ Kneading, kneading, kneading. Here for you. All of you. Always you.ย
Your hands steeple at your mouth to keep the bile gone. โItโsย gone. Our system crashed during backup. Frankโย itโs all gone.โย
โFuck, sweetheartโโ
You bolt to action, scrambling for your things. โIโve- Iโve gotta go back in. Iโm so sorry. Iโm so, so, so sorry, Frank, butย I have to. This is one of our highest priority clientsย I cannotย fuck this up. This- thisย cannotย be happening.โ
You fly outta the car after smearing a distracted kiss to Frankโs cheek. You donโt hear him ask you to wait. Or call your name. Rain and thunder drown him out; an army of one muted by mother nature and some motherfucker namedย Jason.ย
You sprint for the door, swinging it open and a flood of sallow office light spills out, haloing you.ย
Through the rain, the heaviness in your gut, the scorching of your throat, you yell out: โI love you!โย
And the door slams shut behind you, separating you from Frank once again.ย
Quietโs got a way of gettinโ in the skin when businessโs left unfinished.ย
Left things unfinished withย you.ย
Frankโs got a few rules. One of the first: fix the fuckinโ problem.ย
โCause you never know when itโll be your last chance to.ย
Frankโs eyes track the empty parking lot.ย
Finds a sedan there. One with plates Frankโs memorized.ย
And now heโs got you for the night.
Frank snags his phone from his pocket. Thumbs a number without looking. Three ringsโan answer.ย
โYello?โ David answers in a chuckled hum. โFraaaaank. Long time no talk, big guy. Whatโs up? Howโs it goinโ?โย
โNeed a favor,โ Frank grits.ย
Micro scoffs, โHello to youย tooโฆ The familyโs great, thanks for asking. Kidsโre doing good in school, Sarah hasย totallyย forgot about that kissโฆโ
โJesus Christ, Micro. Need you to check a file fโme.โย
โDude, itโs dinner timeโฆ Sarah made this Mediterranean salaโโ
โSalad. Great. Wonโt get cold while youย check this fuckinโ file fโme.โย
โOkay, so Iโm sensing I donโt really have a choice here, did I nail that vibe?โย ย
With a sigh, grumbled huffs, a muffled excuse to Sarah, Frank hears Micro retreating. Laptop opens. Fingers flying over the keyboard.ย
โOkay, alright, here weeee goโฆโ Micro says, computer light throwing blue over his face. โCompany name?โ
โFuck, I dunno?ย PowerPoint?โย
โSheesh, ancient, okay. Who usesย PowerPointย these days?โย
โItโs- itโs a goddamnย presentation, David. Deleted in the last half hour. Can you find it or not?โย
โFrank. Iโm offended you evenย asked.โ A hand over his chest to stop the hurt.ย
โOkayโฆ okayโฆ breaking the firewallโฆ okayโฆ system override, easyโฆ Like, concerningly easy, Jesusโฆโย
Frank bounces a leg. Drums a hand on the wheel.ย
โAaaaaandโฆ hereโฆ I thinkโฆย Found it!โย
Stock-still, back straight, Frank stares at the building, the door you vanished behind. โHow was the file deleted?โ
โUhhhโฆ Manually. Frank, what is this? Promise me this isnโt another government database Iโm cracking because yโknow, Iโm home nowโโ
โGoddamnit, Micro,ย the username. What the hell is it?โย
โJason underscore Caldwell. You, uhโฆ you know the guy? Another one of yourโฆย targets?โ
โWorse,โ Frankโs nostrils flare. โGuyโs fuckinโ with my wife.โย
Itโs late. Regrettably late, and that always seems to be when the thoughts trickle in. Slow at first, and you donโt realize youโre drowning until you canโt breathe.ย
Tucked away in the privacy of the bathroom, you lean into the mirror. You bat the facet on so the sink disguises your dissection, muffles Frank tossing and turning in bed. Hips bent against the counter, your forehead an inch from the glass so you can magnify and inspect every conceivable flaw.ย
Your fingertips shake as they ghost under your eye. Thread-thin lines on the delicate skin only you can see. And then across your cheek, your head angling with the motion, over the dots of pores everyoneโs made of, but you never see theirs. Only yours. Your hair could be better. Your nose could be different. You manipulate your skin with your fingers, experimenting to see how youโd look if your eyes were justโฆย like this. Or if your nose wasย like thatโฆ Or if your eyebrows satย here, instead ofย there. Justโฆ making yourself into a puppet instead of a person.ย
You donโtโฆ you donโtย understandโฆย
Who could love this? Who wouldย wantย this? Why does Frank? Let alone, forย someone elseย to be interested enough to prod at your marriage when thereโs plenty of other available women out there. Thereโs always smarter, prettier,ย better.ย
Frankโs words recite in your head from earlier.ย
โGuys ainโt nice tโpretty ladies fโthe hell of it.โ
โHe ainโt a good guy.โ
โYou need tโstay away from that guy, you hear me?ย Away.โ
You scoff at his certainty, the mere idea flushing your face because itย hurtsย to consider. It fuckingย hurtsย to look at yourself and see an imposter instead of this divine concept of you Frank has.
Turning away from the mirror, your eyes squeeze to shut out the thoughts, you smack the lights off. Safety in darkness; comfort in the blindness. Once you have the shower running, you bat off the sink. Constant noise, anything but the grating static of inadequacy. You shrug out of your cardigan. It falls to the ground in a heap; shed skin, but it doesnโt slough off the fraud.ย
Everything youโve builtโฆ itโs just luck, right? Your job. Your education. Your friendshipsโฆYour marriage. And all luck runs out eventually. What happens when they see you?
What do you do whenโฆ it all comes crashing down? When they see youโre justโฆย you?ย
A soft knock at the door startles you. Your gasp lodges in your throat against raw flesh.ย
โSweetheart?โ Frank asks, voice low and husky from sleep he hasnโt had.ย
โJustโโ you clear the snag in your voice. โJust a second.โย
You wipe the backs of your hands under your nose, shake the rotting guilt from your face, and pick the mask back up to maintain nonchalance.
A second is what Frank gives.ย
With a creak, the door opens.ย
Heavy shuffled steps follow, then pause in the doorway when he clocks the total darkness here, and in the bedroom behind him. Still, you can see his towering silhouette, something carved from mythology and given sentience.ย
Bare, broad shoulders, the sharp slant of his trapezius.ย
โYou, uhโฆโ Frank huffs a chuckle, no humor in it. โYou good? Seeinโ alright in the dark?โย
In your tank and slacks, in the dark where itโs safe, you lean back against the counter, hands grasping the ledge. โIโmโฆ okay.โย
It convinces neither of you.ย
โNeed some sleep, yeah? Got your clothes in the dryer.โย
Your arms cinch around yourself, holding together the shaking pieces, wondering if this is the night they all break. Heโsโฆย so sweet. Frank.ย Always. Thoughtful in ways youโve never been loved before. Considerate to the extent that the only fear you live in is when heโll realize you arenโt worth all this.ย
You log every single example of how Frank loves you, nausea souring your stomach because itโsย overwhelmingย andย beautifulย andย unconditional.ย
he drives you to and from work, every damn dayย
every damn day, your chai teaย Exceptโฆ except todayโฆย
you never go to the grocery store aloneย
you never lift a finger unless you ask to do it yourself, or ask to learn the taskย withย himย
holds you while you cry, even cups a tissue under your nose and tells you to โblowโ after
has never made you feel unsafeย
loves you unconditionally, indefinitely
warms your clothes in the dryerย
thereโs always an electrolyte water in your lunchbox, something you forget, but Frank never doesย
You donโt even realize you havenโt said anything until Frankโs hand is on your waist, guiding you into him, asylum from your mind. Out of touch with your body, you shuffle in automatic steps.ย
โWhatโs goinโ on in that headโa yours, huh? Cโmere.โ Before he can settle you against his chest, you halt.ย
โWhy?โ You finally spurt out, disgust spoiling the one question you havenโt been able to answer after all the years.ย
Against the dark, his head cranes, his fingertips curling your tank-top where youโre just out of reach. โWhy, what?โ
Steam compresses the air, humidity stiflingโnowhere to run, nowhere toย breathe. Everything you hold back sears your throat, veins in your head swelling with pending implosion. โWhyโฆย me?โย
Needing the light toย seeย the repulsion in your voice, Frank flicks on the overhead bulb.ย
You recoil as though the light scorches.ย
There, in the light, he sees you. All of you. The prey animal darting of your bloodshot eyes. Deep lines of worry trekking through your face. The goddamnย sincerityย from which your question came, bowing your shoulders in, shrinking your spine.ย
Frank narrows his eyes on you, certainty cemented in every bone in his face. โโCause thereโsย onlyย you.โ Gritty fact coming out between his teeth, tendons in his neck standing. โOnlyย you.ย Alwaysย you. You and me, sweetheart? We got somethinโย no one else does. We gotย this, yeah?โ Gesturing his finger between you two. โThis.ย Us. You and me.โย
Biting back tears, your skin crawling with your desperation to leave it, you squeak out, โI hate when we fight. Earlier,โ you swallow around the lump in your throat. โIย hatedย that.โย
He softens, eyes opening to mirror your vulnerability, looking a helluva lot like the foot of distance between youย hurtsย him. โHell,โ he rasps, โwouldnโt call that a fight. Just me. Lookinโ out fโyou. Same shit. Always gonna look out fโyou, even if you donโt like hearinโ it.โย
โI donโt like hearing it because itโsย not true. Plain and simple. I donโt get why you think Jasonโs after me.โ You bubble an unconvinced laugh, slapping a hand over your mouth to stop it. โI donโt even understand why youโre with me. You could doย so much better, Frank.โ
A loaded silence perforates the air, bleeding out something ugly, something broken from Frank. Tension ratchets up his shoulders, and self-control shoves themย down. A dry, empty swallow tugs his adamโs apple.ย
The anticipation is anger.ย
The waterโs gone cold. Steam dries up, leaving an empty chill in its wake. Just the patter of the water, amplifying the chasmic space separating you from him.ย
โโฆThe hellย did you just say?โ Frank croaks out, his brows jutting up. โBetter?ย Thanย you?ย There ainโt noย better. There ainโt anyoneย else. Thereโsย nothinโโIโm nothinโโwithout you, goddamn it. You?โ One shake goes through the finger he points at you. โYou fuckinโย saved me, sweetheart.โย
Your eyes crawl from the tip of his finger, up the corded veins in his forearm, and flick a fleeting glance to his eyes.ย God, does it ruin you. The anguish in his stare, so pure you wonder if what you said is form a torture for Frank.ย
Goosebumps cover your arms, and you drag your cold, clammy palms over the skin to intimate comfort, but thereโs no sensation. It only feels like youโre rubbing filth onto yourself, grabbed straight out of the oxygen you used for those words.ย
โThatโs not true,โ you try to argue, but the words hold no faith. Small. You feel small. And like the rotten parts of you are being seen. And seeing those partsโฆ that means leaving, doesnโt it? Itโll mean Frankโs had enough. Heโll realize what you are, what youโve always been.ย
โYeah?โ Frank grates his hand over his mouth like he needs to get rid of the urge to vomit, his eyes jittering with loss. โItโsย myย damn truth.โย
And just like you expectโย Frank leaves.ย
You stuff your fist in your mouth to keep a sob from punching out, and swing for the shower handle to cut theย fuckingย noise out.ย
And with the shower severed, there isโฆย nothing. Grotesqueย proofย youโve always been right. Youโre nothing special. And someday? Frank will leave.ย Frank is leaving.ย
Before the silence makes a home in yours, a new noise takes its place. One that startles you, something wooden clattering together rooms away. Almost sounds likeโฆ the kitchen tableโฆ?ย
Answering your question,ย proving you wrong, Frank reappears. Shirtless, grumbling curses, knocking one of the kitchen chairs through the doorway of the bathroom.ย
โFrank!ย Whatโre you doing!?โย
Dropping the chair down in front of the mirror is his response. Knuckles tented white over the back of the chair, Frank stands angled partially towards you. He jerks his head, summoning you. Shallow breath contracts the muscles in his chest, the ridges of his abdomen. Everything about him screams bridled rage, but he says nothing.ย
โSit,โ he says, voice cracked low.ย
Your eyes slide from Frankโฆ to the chairโฆ back to Frankโฆ โYou want me toโ?โ
With the curt wave of his hand, Frank ends the follow up question.ย
Okay. No more questions. No more excuses. On the balls of your feet, you move in soundlessly until you perch in the chair, drawing your legs up to cross on the seat with you. You donโt look at the mirror.ย You canโt. Clearing your throat, your chin on your shoulder to beย nearย Frank without looking, your whisper comes strained, tight. โWhat am I doing in our kitchen chair in the bathroom at two in the morning, Frank?โย
โSomethinโ I shoulda done a long time ago.โย
Frank towers from behind, heat pouring off his body and into your back. His hands cover your shoulders, his focus on the mirror, your reluctant reflection in it.ย Beautiful, he thinks,ย my perfect girl. If only you could see it. He moves a hand to cup your chin. Moves it โtil youโre headโs straight, โtil youโve got no other choice but the face the person in the mirror.ย
Your bottom lip wobbles. Your eyes strain sideways with your refusal to see.ย
โLook,โ Frank whispers, bending just enough to keep his voice a private rumble, just for you. โLook at yourself fโme, angelโฆ Cโmon.โย
Itโs harder than you think. Looking yourself in the eye. Accepting the imperfections, who you are, who you are not. Because he asked, because your jaw quivers under his affectionโฆ you look. You see. You see yourself. Exhausted, disheveled from the day, half-dressed, fully embarrassed. His thumb skims your cheek, then skates down the curve of your neck to plant back on your shoulder.ย
โThere she isโฆโ Frankโs rough cheer, a twitch at his mouth like he might smile. Frank doesnโt smile much, but the corners of his eyes crinkle.ย
Eyes, after all, are the window to the soul.ย
โThereโs my girl.โย
A quick, unfiltered laugh barks out of you. This isย ridiculous. You press the back of your hand to your mouth, shielding the dark flush over your face. Nerves bounce your leg. โIโm here,โ you shake your head. โNow what?โย
โNow, sweetheart, weโre gonna get those thoughts outta your head and keep โemย gone.โ An unsettling solemnity takes his face, his instruction inarguable. โYouโre gonna sit here, with me, โtil you say fifteen nice things โbout yourself, yeah? You and me both. No bullshittinโ me. No half-assed answers, you got me?โย
โUh-uh. Ainโt playinโ, sweetheart. Weโll sit here all damn night if we got to.โย
Panic catches your breath, but you stay. You flick your eyes to his, looking for any chance to escape, but the lift of his brows says heโs read your mind and itโs not an option.ย
โAinโt playinโ,โ he reiterates, setting his shoulders back to lead. โAlright. โM first.โ Frank draws in a slow, composing breath through his nose, head cocking. โYou gotta lotta faith in people. Trust โem โcause youโre always seeinโ the good.โย
Your eyes narrow, face warm. โโฆYou usually say thatโs poor survival instinct.โ
โDonโt mean it ainโt special,โ he shrugs a shoulder. โYou wonโt let the world break ya.ย Thatโs special.โย
Lips rolled in, a new perspective warm in your stomach, you look down at the interlace of your fingers as you toy with your thumbs. You nod; a thanks without words.ย
โYour turn,โ Frank squeezes your shoulder.ย
โIn the mirror, sweetheart. Eyes on you.โย
You try again. Staring back at yourself, you expand with a steeling inhale. โIโฆ likeโฆ my neck lengthโฆ?โ
โโฆYour neck length.โย
โNice try, sweetheart. Try again.โย
Your shoulders deflate, but Frankโs right there to give a little shake of encouragement. โOkay. I likeโฆโฆโฆ how I show up for the people I love.โย
Frank perks,ย slightly, approving of the sincerity. โAtta girlโฆโ He lifts a hand from your shoulder, big fingers instead weaving through the ends of your hair. He quiets again, expression smoothing with the gravity of confession. โYouโre a saint, yeah, I think you are. Got such a big heart you needโa find room in it fโyourself.โย
The honestyโthe real truthโputs you in pensive thought. Teeth grazing your bottom lip, you nod. You understand. You see it, too. Arms linking around your knees, you smoosh Frankโs hand against your cheek and shoulder to keep him.ย
โOnly one you,โ Frank says as he leans down, planting his lips against the top of your head, breathing you in so his world keeps turning. โThatโs what makes you so goddamn special. Makes an ass like me so goddamn lucky.โย
Throat constricting, tears full but balanced in your eyes, you push out the words, โI love you, Frank,โ and the man you loveย smiles.ย
โLove you more, sweet girl. Ainโt off the hook yet, though. Fourteen more, cโmon.โ
And as you conjure up fourteen more things you can say you like about yourself, your posture straightens. Laughter returns, shared between the two of you. Tears well in your eyes but donโt fall. The first one was the hardest. The rest you find with Frankโs help while he threads his fingers through your hair, or drags the back of his knuckles over your cheek, or brushes his thumb over your bottom lip.ย
Youโre talkinโ. Laughinโ. Finally cuttinโ yourself some slack. Seeinโ you like thisโsoft, unguardedโreminds Frank what he first fell in love with when he met you.ย
Your goddamn heart. Got so much youโre full of it.ย
Frank understands what needs to be done. Heโll do it. Without a doubt.ย
Heโll put the fear of god into the motherfucker that preys on your doubts, your heart, under the guise ofย kindness. Usinโ his wifeโs goddamnย sweetnessย to manipulate her. Slowly. Carefully. Like heโs got all the time in the world.ย
Shark to blood, Frank stalks the maze of halls to your office. Black on black, ballcap cinched down, he cuts through the normality of business casual and overhead lights like plague.ย
Heโs the fuckinโ omen.ย
Fist vising a fresh bouquet of flowers, the cellophane crinkles. A stalk snaps. Boots thunder down the corridors he memorized first structurally, by blueprint, then physically, during his first visit years ago. Your colleagues flatten against walls, find convenient exits, avert their eyesโanything to beย smallย in the presence of The Punisher. They donโt know itโs himโฆ butย they feel it, the conquest for blood, the irrefutability of his violent nature.ย
Frank did his homework weeks ago. Soon as the bastard got hired, Frank had a full background check, credit scores, past addresses, and medical history. Poor bastardโs got scoliosisโno wonder he employs sick tactics on a sweet girl like you. Guyโs got no damn spine. Frankโll reshape it, alright.ย
The hall empties out by the time Frank approaches your office. He slows, head craning to see you through the open door as you work. Sunlight from the new picture windows soaks you โtil you glow gold. You mutter to yourself, movinโ here, movinโ there, unpacking trinkets from a box to arrange just how you like it in your new office.ย
Promotion paid off. You earned every bit of it. โSpecially when yourย breath of fresh airย wiped your fuckinโ work. Frankโs not told you that. Wonโt let you carry that hurt when he can handle it.ย
Without a sound, Frank leans a shoulder against the doorway. Flowers hang at his side. Temporarily? He forgets the real reason he came. Itโs you. โCourse itโs you. But it ainโt this. Flowers.
Frankโs the kinda guy who mistakes warm and fuzzy for heartburn. He gets alotta heartburn around you.ย
Turns into a full blown coronary as he watches you dip both hands into the box, takinโ somethinโ in those gentle fingers like itโs priceless. You lift it out, and Christ, heโs done for.ย
Front and center on your desk, you nestle a framed photo between your monitors. The picture?
You and him. Years ago. Halloween. Hours after Frank got back, beaten only a quarter of the way dead this time. You sat between his legs on the front steps of your apartment, handinโ out candy to kids. Frank gave you relentless hell for your costume, a damn scarecrow.ย
When a kid asked Frank, โWhatโre you dressed as, mister?โ
And Frank said, โAn asshole,โ without blinking, heโllย neverย forget the way you laughed.ย
You, stupidly adorable makeshift scarecrow costume. Paint on your nose, cheeks. Cheeks puffed in the biggest smile known to man.ย
Him, busted mouth crooking what it could of a smile he forgot how to make. Reminds himself of the goal heโs not yet shared: get away from the life. Retire. No more busted lips in pictures. No more bruises to come home and concern you with. No more holidays spent dressinโ his wounds.ย
Masking the aspirating blast ofย loveย tightening his voice, recalibrating to the mission instead of reminiscing, Frank speaks. โWorkinโ hard, sweetheart? Or hardly workinโ?โ
Hearing Frankโs voiceโfamiliar rumbly gravelโsparks through every nerve in your system to liven you. You spin on a heel, face breaking into a wide smile, big smile. Youโre dashing to him before you realize, drawn naturally.ย
โFrank?ย Oh my god,ย hi,โ your arms already winding around him waist, pressing your face against his chest to feel the steadyย thud, thud, thudย of his heart. Your safe place. Your home. โWhatโ I wasnโt expecting you,โ with a breathy laugh. โWhatโre you doing here?โย
โCongratulatinโ my girl, yeah?โ He binds his arms around you. Gives a loving nudge of his stubbled chin on your forehead to ease you back, get access, and find your mouth with his.ย
Lifted on your tiptoes, your weight braced by Frankโs forearm banded across your lower back, you tip your head to get a better taste. Lips slotted deeperโeasy to blame your excitement on the surpriseโyou hum a sound Frank laps off your mouth.ย
You want seconds. You consider seconds, delight teetering to greedy, so you compromise with two pecks and pull back to look him in the eye. Hands on his biceps for support, head tilted back so your lashes fan your eyebrow, you beam up at him.ย
โDamn,โ Frank blinks, halfway disoriented. โI get that every time I bring flowers?โ
โStop by more often and youโll find out.โ
โYeah? Gonna let me in, give me a tour?โย
โMaybeย moreย than a tour, if youโre lucky.โ
โLuckโs drawn to me like flies on shit.โ
You snort. โโฆRight.โ
Separating a fraction, Frank offers the flowers to you in the space between his chest. Your eyes fall to them, face softening. Gentle with appreciation, over the bundle of white lilies, you press another kiss to his lips. โThank you,โ you murmur against him. โThese are beautiful. For being a hard ass, youโre kinda romantic, Frank.โย
โRomantic, huh?โ Frank watches the shape of your body as you go to tend to the flowers. โCanโt let you get used tโthat.โ
โToo late.โ You flash a small smile in his direction, acknowledging what you both know: Frankโs not romantic in the big ways, but he loves you so much weaker men wouldโve gone stupid.ย
While you cut the stems over the wastebasket, Frank performs a simple recon of the room. Finds evidence of his target. A blazer thrown over the back of a chair. A half-drank coffee. Sloppy handwriting over an abandoned notepad.ย
โYour friend here?โ Frank asks, anything but innocent.ย
Snip. Snip. You glance at him with a raised brow. โStephanie?โย
โNah.โ Frank points at the notebook. โHim.โย
Snโฆipโฆ Skepticism setting in, your nose scrunches. โโฆJason?โย
โYeah.ย Him. He around?โ
โFigured I should meet the guy spendinโ forty hours a week up my wifeโs ass.โ
You shoot a glare, lacking any real depth. โโฆHeโs gone for the day.โ
โAnd left his shit in here like this?โ Frank wants to say heโs an inconsiderate slob. Frank refrains from pointinโ out the guyโsย makinโ himself at home in your space.ย
โItโs three things,โ you quirk a brow. โNot a big deal.โ
โHe gonna be back tomorrow?โย
โWe have a meeting at nine a.m. sharp, so Iโm gonna hope so.โ
โGood,โ Frank concludes, satisfied. That works, too.ย
Stalks trimmed, you arrange the lilies in a vase, fingers hanging on the glass rim when youโre finished. โForget about him,โ you shake your head. โYouโre here, visiting me, itโsย just the two of us, and youย definitelyย made my day. I couldnโt be happier right now, Frank.โย
โYeah?โ Something rare and short-lived flashes in his eyes; the look where heโs still trying to believe thisโyouโare his. โGuess I did my job.โ With the heel of his boot, he knocks the door shut. Prowls the rest of the way to you, his hands at home on your hips to draw you right up against him.ย
Your arms snake around his neck, melting into the solidity of Frank. By the bill, you ease his hat off, seeing him in the full, natural light of the windows behind you. Hat in your hands, his head bent, you reach up and kiss the crook of his nose. And again, on the bridge. And again, on the tip. And falling lower, to his mouth.ย
Thereโs no tentative introduction. Not when your arms buckle around him and jerk him closer. Not when his mouth opens, inseparable from you, to taste the seam of your lips. You hiccup something dangerously close to a moan, stifled by the palm that cups your jaw, the big fingers that press into either side of your cheeks to lightly mush your lips.ย
โโBout to start somethinโ we wonโt be able to walk away from,โ Frank goads on your mouth, voice reduced to hot husk and need.ย
Upper lip twitching, your teeth clink against his. โCanโt get my outfit dirty. Iโve got a presentation in twenty.โย
โAllโs I needโs ten.โย
โYou.โ Boot hooked around the chair leg, Frank yanks it over. Drops down into it, knees spread wide. Looking up at you, his stare inevitable and dark, Frank pats his thigh. โSit. Wanna show you how good the city can look from up here.โย
You forget everythingโespeciallyย the presentation in twentyโwhile you overlook the city in your new office, on your husbandโs lap, his hand between your legs and the other over your mouth, his boots hooking your ankles open.
You forget about the flowers on display in your desk. Frank communicates through the flowers he buys. You shouldโve known. Shouldโve read into it more. But you didnโt.ย
A harbinger in the form of velvet petals and the color of purity, specifically picked by Frank: the lilies.ย
Wasnโt anything unusual when you texted Frank that afternoon with a change of plans:ย
Going out for drinks after work! Stephanieโs driving me there. Pick me up after? Come a little early to help stage my escape and we can go somewhere else to have a few together. Xoxoxoย
Iโll be there, sweetheart. Count on it.ย
Bar stinks. Smells like fuckinโ shit. Notย actualย shit.ย Bullshitโworst kind. Full moonโs got people squirrelly. Has Frank on edge.ย
Tucked on the other side of the room, corner high top, Frank monitors you from afar. Wonโt interrupt your time out. Doesnโt like people much, anyway. Sipping his beer, bottle small in his grasp, Frank clocks the faces he knows from your work, watches every interaction. Even if he hasnโt met โem, heโs done his homework. Has faces to names, street addresses, registered vehicles. Five coworkers with you, and a sixth, unattended drinkย besideย you.ย
The rock in Frankโs gut says he knows. Says itโs divine intervention, givinโ him an opportunity. A gift. Wonders if Redโd see it that way, too.ย
Fuck, sweetheart, youย glowย under the shitty neon lights and grimy haze of smoke. Too damn pretty for a place like this. Kinda place where if you go out back? Youโll get gutted while a handful of bikers smoke and itโs your own fault for havinโ the balls.ย
Feeling Frankโs stare, you look through the crowd, finding him at his usual post. You lift your glass. Frank lifts his. A salutation from a distance, a promise for more time together later in a cheers, a sip, and a smile.ย
You go back to your friends.ย
Frank resumes guard, ensuring your safety, so you can focus on enjoying yourself.ย
Turning back to the bar, the animated chatter of tipsy talking, inebriated laughter, you feelโฆย good.ย Happy. Elbows on the sticky counter, the vodka soda in both hands, you smile. Content now, knowing later promises the best kind of fun, but itโs just you, Frank, and the entire night.ย
You donโt have long to indulge in the thoughts. Jason sidles back up beside you, his shoulder pressing against yours in the congested room. He smells like aftershave, smells good, honestly, not in a hungry way, just respectable. He smells like heย tried.ย
โEverything go okay at your doctorโs appointment?โ you ask, nudging at the reason he left the office early today.ย
โDoctorโs appointment?โ Jason fires back before he realizes. โOh, right. Yeah, definitely. Doctorโs appointment went good, went wellโฆ Justโฆ routine.โย
You hum, nod along, but as you look at his profileโconversational attentionโyou notice the clean clipper passes through his hair. And then at his jaw, the skin faintly red, leftover friction of a razor blade. So heโฆ went to the doctorโฆ got a haircutโฆย shavedโฆ and then you notice his clothesโฆ Dark dress jeans, a fitted quarter-zip. Jasonโs not a bad looking guy, but heโs definitely not your type either. Too clean, too concerned with gaining,ย obtainingย instead of sharing or supporting. Talks a little too much about crap he can convince you knows a lot about, even if he knows nothing. Helps him at work, and he knows it.ย
โI hope Iโm not prying here, surely you wonโt mind me askingโฆโ Jason says, not asking permission, taking it anyway. He faces you completely, elbow on the bar. He looks down, thumbing the rim of his old fashioned, pensive as an act. โIs your husbandโฆ good to you?โย
Almost swallowing your straw, you spit it out in a stuttered cough, brows over your head. โWhat?โย
โYou seem reallyโฆย tenseย all the time. You said yourself, heโs intense.โย
You bubble a genuine, incredulous laugh. โMy husbandโs not the problem. Heโs intense, sure, but thatโs not aย downfall.โย
โIt is if youโre distracted and uneasy.โย
โIโmโย what?โ you belt out, face screwed. Itโs the first youโre hearing about being distracted, uneasy, orย tense. โIโm atย work. We haveย deadlines, high stakes, high pressure.ย Homeย isnโt the problem.โย
Jason draws a clicking breath between his teeth, as if he knew youโd say that, and youโre still wrong. Kind,ย compassionate, even, he looks at you with enough sympathy to drown you.ย
โI think for you, workโs aย break. Iโm just looking out for you, definitely not trying to be the bad guy here, you know Iโd never do that,โ Jason raises his hands to claim innocence. โWhat Iโm trying to say isโฆ you deserve someoneโฆย nice.โ
โLike you?โ you prompt, heart thrumming with Frankโs accusation from days ago.ย
Jason shrugs, biting back a smirk since you said it. โSomething for you to think about. I mean, look at all the time we spend together. Calls, staying later than we have to in the officeโฆย I know you,ย I see youย in those quiet moments.โย
Bewildered by theย audacity, brain turning the words over multiple times as you put together a rebuttal. โYouย callย me, Jason. You- you have questions, need help on a sheetโฆ I answer and stay because Iโmย supposedย to. Itโs calledย being a good coworker, notย attraction.โย
โBut you answer. Every time. And you never tell me you have to go. You stay on the line, stay in the officeโฆ with me. Whatโs that say aboutย you?ย Your marriage?โ Jason gauges your reaction. Pushesย harder. โWhatโs the say aboutย us?โย
Jaw hanging, your mind races to the last long call you had with Jason. That night Frank cornered you at the counter, kissing and biting your neck, your jaw, trying to coax your attention toย home, toย him. Youย toldย Jason you were home. You vocalized polite deflections that hinted the conversation needed to end. Butโฆ this is where being polite got you, stuck with the ideas of yourself you continuously reject, watching them come to fruition. You resist the urge to yell for Frank. You know, desperately, Frank can make the problems go away, remove you from this equation, but Frank canโt fight all of your battles for you.ย
โYou,โ you say, cocking a hip out, your jaw jutted. โYouย need to learn your place. Now, if youโll excuse me, Iโm gonna go to the bathroom, and when I come back?ย This never happened, and itย will never happen again. Are we clear?โย
Giving him no time to respondโthe only answer is yesโyou storm off. Shoulder through the crowd, and close yourself in the bathroom to cool down.ย
Frank watched the whole thing. Waited for you to give the signal. The:ย Frank, I need you over hereย signal. You never did. You wanted to handle it on your own. Alright. Frank respects that. Admires it. But seeinโ you walk off like that?ย Shit. No stayinโ out of it now.ย
No stayinโ out of it whenโฆ
At the bar, Jason rummages in his pocket, hands trembling with urgency. Pulls out a baggie, small, coke-sized. No coke in it. Just five peach, oblong tablets.
Violent inspiration for Frank.ย
Jason digs a finger in the baggie. Scoops outย twoย pills. Drops a third on the floor with a hissed curse, fumbling for it.ย
Sockets yank loose in Frankโs head, vision going red. Tendons cable through his neck, breath ragged and shallow; an animal without a leash. Frank chains himself with a fist around his beer bottle, squeezingย tighter.ย
If that pill goes into your fuckinโ drinkโฆย
Frank shoulda taken this sick fuck out in his own home, do it on his turf, repaint the sonnuva bitchโs apartment with his brains.ย
Tighter.ย The glass creaks. Whines. The bottleย quakes.ย
Ghosts in his palms, clear as day, Frank jolts as he feels old bones and old corpses break in his fingers. Hundredsโthousandsโdismantled by the hands he uses to love you.ย
The noises start. You know the ones. The guttural reeving of a man-made machine; an element ofย pure fucking consequence.ย
The bottleย explodes. Glass bursts. Beer flies.ย
Jason drops two tablets into your drink. Through the swarm of people, Frank sees the drugs contaminate, spreading poison without your fuckinโ consent.ย
Instinct and action convergeโthen explode.ย
Before Jason can lower his hand, Frank tears through the masses. Not a man.ย A weapon. Retribution. Vengeance. Divine wrath.
The fuckinโ judge, jury, and executioner.ย
Pain reaching him before realization does, Jason screams. Bloodcurdling agony scratches out the music, the clamor, all fuckinโย sound. Brain catching up to the excruciating pain, the cause of it, Jason stares at the snare of his wrist.ย Whatโs left of it. Snapped back, hand hanging off the wrist, bone spearing under the skin in fractured protrusions.ย ย
If not for the pain, itโs theย soundย that puts the fear of god in Jason.ย
In the span of two seconds, Frank bounces Jasonโs head on the counter with a wet crack of skull, heel of his hand pinning him in place. The glassโyour glassโabsorbing the drug magnifies Jasonโs skittering eyes, his stammering breath painting the countertop.ย
โPuttinโ shit in a girlโs drink, huh?โ Frank spits, smashing Jasonโs head until it purples.ย
Everyone gives Frank a wide berth. Whispers ofย The Punisherย start to circulate, always do on this side of town.ย ย
โI didnโt-! I-I-Iโโ Jason sputters, spittle and fear flying.ย
โYouย DID!โ Frank roars, slam, slam,ย slammingย Jasonโs head for a three count, blood sprinkling the wood. โYou think Iโm stupid, hm? Talkinโ to me like Iโm fuckinโ stupid? You think I look stupid?โย
โNo- no! No! God, no!โ Anything to get off the hook.ย
โThen donโtย fuck with meย like Iโm fuckinโ stupid.ย Now,โ Frank cages Jason in from behind, a massive hand squeezing between his cheeks to pry open his mouth. โDrink it.ย You were gonna feed this shit to my wife.ย You drink it.โย
Frank lifts the glass as Jason pounds the counter with his good hand, smearing his face in a desperate bid for escape.ย
As the narcotized drink teeters the rim of the glass, ready to spill over into Jasonโs pleading, incessant mouth, a voiceโconcerned, still sweetโcuts through the thick of it.ย
โF-Frank?โ Legs jellied from shock, you shuffle forward, the herd parting for you. โWhatโs going onโฆ?โย
Frank looks over his shoulder. Right to you.ย Jesus, his heart almost gives out. You. His wife. Precious, delicate, so fuckinโ good the scum of the earth tries to eat ya. Frank wonโt let that happen. โHey, sweetheart, no problem. Havinโ a civil conversation with hotshot here aboutย human decency. Caught yourย breathโa fresh airย spikinโ your drink, sโall.โย
A green-tinge floods your face. โOhโ? Ohโฆ my godโฆโ The ground beneath you swirls. A hand on your stomach to keep the vomit in, other hand curling into a fist, you grit your question through your teeth.ย โWhy?โย
Jason huffs, all panted breath and nowhere to run. โBecause,โ he hisses, grunting when Frank pinches the back of his neck like scruff. โBecauseย youโre special.โย
Jasonโs thrown into the brick wall of the back alley with a heavy slap of limp meat.
โTell me what the fuck that was!โ Frank yells, words clawed from his throat.ย
Intimidation tactic, galvanic rage with nothing to do butย bleed, Frank slugs his fist into the wall by Jasonโs face, letting him cower and piss and beg while he feels the fury sailing an intentional centimeter off mark.ย
โFuckinโย tell me. Tell me. Tell me.โย
In harmony with the strike of his fist.ย
The drizzle of piss on the groundโs the fuckerโs first answer.ย
โIt- it wasnโtโโ choked on his own terror, Jason tries to crawl up the wall. โIt wasnโtย bad!ย I swear! It- it wasnโt roofies or anything, just- just something to help herย relax. It was just Xanโโ
And with a shark to bloodโฆย there comes the frenzy.ย
โYou donโt decide what my wife fuckinโ needs! Sheโs a strong womanโโย wham, an uppercut straight into Jasonโs solar plexus. โSheโs fuckinโย strong. Goddamn rightย sheโs special.โย
Blood gurgling from his mouth, Jason groans, tries to double-over.ย
โStand the fuck up. Ainโt finished with you,โ Frank clocks him back, velocity of his punch leaving Jason damn-near crucified on the wall. โTake it like a fuckinโย manย since thatโs what you wanna be. Controllinโ women like that.ย Fuck.โย
Weak men are whatโs wrong with the world.ย ย
โSheโs the only good thing I fuckinโย got. You fuckinโ hear me?ย Huh?โย
No reply. Just the sputtering cries of a grown man in crisis. Music to Frankโs ears.ย
โI saidโโ Frank latches onto both of Jasonโs ears.ย Rips. Blood gushes out as the seams start to separate.ย โYOU FUCKINโ HEAR ME?โย
The shrieking says heโs heard. And felt.ย
Leaves โem connected even if he shouldnโt.ย
Frank thinks about you. His girl. Your grin over that chai latte. Your laugh in his ear late at night while you narrate a documentary on fuckinโ whales. Halloween night those years ago, same picture on your desk now. Slow dancinโ in the kitchen to your terrible music, half asleep, tucked into him like heโs safety instead of a biblical reckoning.ย
And this motherfucker was gonna do onlyย god knows what to you.ย
Frank snaps back when Jason hacks up blood.ย
โYou stayย awayย from her,โ Frankโs fists ball in Jasonโs collar, nose to nose, teeth bared as verbalized venom poisons the air. โLook me in the eye and tell me you fuckinโย hear me. Say it. Fuckinโย say it. Say: I hear you, Frank. I get you, Frank. Say: sorry Iโm a stupid cunt, Frank. Say: I deserve everythinโ cominโ my way.โย
Jason recites every word, verbatim, through chattering teeth. Calls himselfย ย a stupid cunt. Says he hears Frank, gets Frank, deserves this.ย
โAre- are you gonna kill me?โ Sprawled pliant on the wall, shirt catching the rough brick, reduced to a stuck hog instead of a man.ย
โYeah,โ Frank says simply. โYeah. โM gonna need to do that.โ
Sunโs hot on Frankโs back, even at seven in the morning. Sweat funnels down his back, soaking his tee. Been up before the sun digging the shit for a proper burial. Size twelve shoebox duct taped shut and off to the side.ย
Grunting, Frank stakes the shovel back in the ground, adding to the mounds of fresh dirt on either side of his boots. Hole in the ground sized for a dismembered man in a garbage bag.ย
Shovel leaned against his side, Frank wipes the back of his hand over his forehead. Sweat smears dirt. Looks up at the sky. Blue as can be. Bright as hell. Looks a lot like forgiveness. Or deception. Frank canโt tell these days.ย
Readjusting the handle in his blistered palms, spade ready to pierce the dirt, the back door creaks open. Gets his attention.ย
Frank straightens in sections of his vertebrae, squinting against the halo of sunlight aroundโฆย you.ย
You walk out, barefoot in the grass, sleep-soft in your pajamas yet. And you bringย coffee. An angel. His angel.ย
Frank lets go of a breath he didnโt know he held. โIโll be up soon, yeah?โ he calls. Doesnโt stop you. โDirty work out here you donโt need tโsee, sweetheart.โย
You ignore the advice, shuffling your way right to him on an invisible track. When you reach him, you pass a mug of coffee.ย
Dirt-lined fingers clasp it by the rim, taking a generous sip through the billow of steam. โMm,โ he hums, angling from the pit in the ground and towards you instead, eyes sliding down the satin set blessing your curves. โWhatโre you doinโ out here, huh?โย
โBringing you coffee. Enjoying the sun,โ you sip from your own cup, eyes locked on him.ย
โAinโt complaininโ.โ
โYou didnโt have to do this, you know,โ you murmur, curling into Frankโs side.ย
The hole in front of you two. But it doesnโt bother you. Maybe it should, butโฆ it doesnโt. Not how you thought it might.ย
Frank leans down. Presses a kiss to the top of your head. Drapes an arm over your shoulders lightly, afraid of dirtying you, too. โYeah,โ Frank agrees. โDidnโt have to.โ He shrugs. โWanted to.โ
โKinda looks big enough for a body in a garbage bag,โ you tilt your head, lips pursed in thought. โYou know, if you chopped him up.โย
Frank raises a brow. โScrewy thoughts for a pretty little thing like you so early,โ but he stamps two kisses your temple like he approves.ย
You hum, chin inclining for more affection. โTo be fairโฆ Twinkles was aย reallyย fat cat. Itโs nice of you to do this for Ms. Jenkins.โ
โThe ladyโs, what? A hundred? Ainโt gonna make her dig the damn hole for her own cat.โย
You laugh, quiet and soft for the morning. Warms Frank right up.
Pretending your top needs adjusting, Frank smooths the fabric at your shoulder, fingertips dragging down your arm, landing at the small of your back. Light touch. Featherlight. Keeps you clean. โYou alright, sweetheart?โ Quieter, with the weight of last week.ย
Your chest inflates with a slow, steady breath. Coffee in one hand, other splaying over Frankโs stomach, you think. Then nod. โYeah, Iโmโฆ okay. A little fucked up over it all, but Iโm okay. Iโm good.โย
โAlright. Good. We good?โ
โWeโre good. More than good.โ
โSโlong as weโre good.โย
โI got an update, by the wayโฆโ
Frank tucks his chin, looking down at you in the closeness. โYeah?โย
โYeahโฆ got the email this morning. Jasonโs been relocated to another building. So he must be out of the hospital.โ
โHm,โ Frank hides the satisfaction with indifference. โGood.โ
โโฆto another state.โ
โHey,โ you shift. โIโve been meaning to say a few thingsโฆ Like Iโm sorry. And thank you.โ
โAh,โ Frank shakes his head. โDonโt owe me nothinโ.โย
โI owe you an apology for not believing you.โ You slide in front of him, reaching up to span your hand over his stubbled cheek. โYou warned me. You were right. I didnโt listen. Iโฆ couldnโt see what you saw. About the situation, aboutโฆย me.โย
Frank leans into your touch, brows knitting before they relax. โAlways lookinโ out fโyou. Donโt need to apologize for believinโ someoneโs good.โ
โI need to be more aware.โย
โNah,โ Frank turns his head in. Kisses your palm. โYou stay sweet. You leave the cynicism tโme. What you need tโdo, though, sweetheart?โ Frank drops the shovel. Wipes his mouth on his shoulder. โBelieve inย yourself. Ainโt nothinโ in here thatโll change how people see you,โ Frank says, tapping his finger against your sternum. โThisโs good. Special.ย You. Canโt go all your life with doubt. Itโll rein you in. Keep you there. Wonโt let you go far.โย
You drop your forehead to his chest, his sweat placating the old wounds. โI knowโฆโย
โWeโll work on it.โย
Itโs a promise. A plan.ย
โThank you,โ you say, looking up at him through your lashes. โI never said thank you. Thank you forโฆ looking out for me. Being patient. Doing everything in your power to keep the world from hurting me. Even when Iโm the one hurting myself with my doubts.ย Especiallyย then.โ
Frank tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. Dips in, his nose nudging yours. โNothinโs gonna take you from me, yeah? Bubble wrap you if I got to. I got you, baby.โย
Hand sliding to his neck, you draw him down. Kiss him. Slow and easy, intimate in the understanding of what this man, your husband, will do for you. The extent heโll go to.ย
Drawing back, he nips your bottom lip. Replaces your mouth with a drink. Not the same warmth, but itโll do. For now.ย ย
Arm around his waist, nestled back into his side, you stand with the question thatโs burned you most. Until you canโt. โโฆWhyโd you stop?โย
Frank turns his head to you. You look up at him. You see each other in the light of a new day. A quiet day. โYou wouldnโt want that, yeah? Pretty girl. Everything I doโs fโyou.โย
โLove you too, sweetheart.โย
โWe should probably finish burying Twinkles. I think Ms. Jenkins is watching from her window.โย
โEh. Let her. Wanna give her a show?โย
โMmm, probablyย not. Itโd probably be her last.โย
Frank takes a breath of fresh air.ย
Shit doesnโt stink anymore.ย
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