we all begin somewhere

if eating three balanced meals a day at regular times makes you gain weight then maybe you were meant to gain weight

ugh its just that when ilya asks "do they know?" shane's first thought is do they know about you? because he can't fathom any version of him being gay, interested in someone, etc, that's not linked to how he feels about ilya ughhh. he can't imagine ilya not being part of that picture bc he's so deeply tied to how shane experiences desire and queerness ughhhh they make me feel crazy

they don't really use pet names when they're around other people but their teammates learn very quickly that there is ilya (positive) and ilya (negative) and rozanov (fuck yeah that was fucking gorgeous) and rozanov (if you do not shut the fuck up immediately i swear to fucking god) and shane (adoring) and shane (sad) and hollander (that's how you fucking do it!) and hollander (sit your fucking ass down or we will have a problem) and these distinctions are way more important to keep track of than the five times a month hollander calls cap "baby" and cap's face goes all sappy

thinking about the first time shane and ilya are having sex post-cottage and shane stops to fold ilya's clothes alongside his own. praying for shane's hole in that moment.

I think Ilya would get a similar high from making Shane laugh as he does from getting him off. And I mean like the full body, breathless, tears in eyes laughter that I think would be hard to get out of Shane. Shane’s more of a light chuckle kind of person, so any time Ilya gets him truly laughing he’d flaunt it just as much as getting him to come hands free, if not a little more, since he can actually brag about the laughter.

Back when I was a redditor (😔) I realized a strange phenomenon. No one cares about your original posts, but if you make the post on another site and screenshot it, people assume it’s a tweet from someone who is known/is funny/etc and the post would do way better

#truly go to helllll#i have NOT forgotten nor forgiven the white dykes losing their minds over that clip of megan flirting with lil miami#literally looked at another woman giggling and kicking her feet and said “i'd top if we had sex”#and all these demons in the replies were like “no queer woman would ever talk about sex this way!!!!”#and do you all recall the suspicion aimed @ janelle 'appropriating' queerness when they dropped dirty computer?#I think about it every damn day#AND cardi having to clap some kid on twitter about how she was eating pussy before they were born?#y'all truly hate queer black women who don't fit the mold of soft uwu cottagecore white girl pining so much ( @batmanisagatewaydrug )

I feel like Ilya would definitely get some “ball and chain” type of comments regarding Shane and at one point he ends up in a group of guys who start ragging on him when he's thinking about heading out early, calling him whipped, joking about Shane having him on a tight leash, and Ilya ends up just saying, genuinely confused, “do you guys not like your wives?” There’s complete silence for a second before Ilya continues, “maybe you should give them the chance to find someone who actually enjoys spending time with them." And then he goes home to his husband, who also happens to be his favourite person in the world.