we all begin somewhere

thinking abt the first time shane calls ilya his family… it’s fall 2017 they’re talking abt christmas shane asks ilya if he’ll come spend it with him & his parents in ottawa & ilya is all ‘oh you don’t have to invite me i know christmas is a family thing for you’ and shane is ??? um yeah… you’re my family… which is why i want you here…. & ilya dies on the spot

a side effect of the fact that shane and ilya are not just husbands but also best friends is that i do in fact believe that shane calls ilya "dude" sometimes. he's a jock !! he's a jock and that's his best friend and the coolest and funniest person he knows like yes that's his man but that's also his dude !

I think there's a part of Shane that genuinely believes that when he finishes his last game, they will take him out back and shoot him like a sick dog.

ilya getting into a fight cus some player tried to be homophobic with him asking “is shane fucking you in the ass tonight?” and he answered “i hope so” and the player snarked “disgusting f*” and ilya smirked and says “maybe you’d be half as good as me if you took it up the ass, but no one wants a man who’s been fed by his parents with a slingshot because he’s too ugly to be approached” and even the player’s teammates chuckled and he lunged after ilya. on the way to the sin bin ilya skated close to his husband and he looked towards shane that only asked “how many?” and ilya answered “hat trick” and shane stepped on the ice to do as ilya said.

Baby Shane playing imaginary hockey and then pausing to give imaginary press interviews where he just says things like "gotta put pucks in the net" in his tiny little 7 year old voice.

So many women are looking for a “masc lesbian” but what they really mean is that they want a top who has their life together lmao

“You got masc vibes even though you are a femme” do I? Or do you just think that confidence and competence are inherently linked to masculinity?

Like if you want someone to top you till you cry then you should just say that. There are many women who can provide, many of them femme.

But also it’s kind of rude to assign gender roles and sexual preferences to someone just because they’re masc. just because she wears a snapback that doesn’t mean she’s a top or able to fix your car or whatever.

they’re hanging out with friends and bood’s wife cassie asks everyone what the weirdest place they’ve ever had sex was and people start answering “in a public restroom” and “we tried on a plane but it didn’t really work out” and “in a store fitting room” and a few other unconventional places, and then cassie notices that shane and ilya haven’t answered yet and goes “haven’t you guys ever done it in a weird place?” and ilya replies “no, we’re a model couple, just at home, missionary" and everyone laughs and troy says “no one believes that man” and ilya goes “okay, in boodram’s garage” and bood almost yells “WHAT?” and ilya and shane burst out laughing and shane playfully slaps him and says still laughing a little “he’s kidding, we’ve never had sex at any of our friends houses” and cassie presses “so where?” and ilya looks at shane who nods and says “the all stars weekend in the restroom by the pool” and harris gasps “how you guys managed?” and ilya and shane shrugs and cassie goes “wasn’t everyone looking for you two?” and ilya “you guys would be surprise with how others players couldn’t care less about us in those places” and troy asks “and in spain?” and ilya answers “oh yeah we did in a hammock in a yatch in the middle of the ocean. kinda weird but if we’re really pressed together and on our sides—" and shane interrupts “we’ve already given too many details for today” and everyone groans in frustration cus they never share their intimacy and people love to hear about hot couples having sex.

Nature is healing