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᯽ Sen ᯽ She/her ᯽ INFP

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Most of the reason why people commit suicide is because supposedly the pain will end after they die.

But honestly I think as long as I am me, even if I die, the suffering will never end. I honestly think I'll never be happy even after I die. Just the difference is after I die, there wont be any new pain, just the ones I've already had/been through.

It's like a curse that follows beyond mortality.

Whatever comes after death, heaven, hell, or even just a pitch black of darkness, I'll still suffer. If I were to even be put in heaven I still think my mind would create me a hell.

After all, I am still me, still with the same mind that continues to relentlessly bully me every single day. Even if I was born onto a new person, I fear my doom would follow me in my new life.

It's simply impossible to achieve true happiness.

But maybe if I were to dissipate entirely out of existence would I finally find solace in pure emptiness.