spaghetti rights

Damn didn’t have to call me out this hard

They all get me so well

but

When you shake it, jar jar clinks.

IVE ONLY SEEN THIS IN SCREENSHOTS

Does anyone else have that one friend whose sleep schedule is like an ever-evolving mystery? One day they’ll appear to be asleep for the entire 16 hours that you’re awake, but the next three they won’t appear to actually sleep at all. Sometimes they appear to be on Australian time, other times their schedule has adjusted to somewhere in the middle of the Pacific ocean. (I call this Cthulhu time.) You go a week without seeing them and you have no idea if they’re just really busy, dead, or if their sleep has simply synced up to the exact hours you’re awake and online. The only indication that they’re still in this mortal coil is vague posts about grocery shopping that pop up on their blogs at 4:12AM. 

i too am that friend

sir will you please stop doing the worm your wife is in labor 

ma'am will you stop being in labor your husband is doing the worm

IM A TEENAGER I WANNA BE DANGEROUS I WANNA DO SOMETHING CRAZY I WANNA GO STEAL A TRAFFIC LIGHT

AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO THOUGHT TRAFFIC LIGHTS WERE A LOT SMALLER

STOP STEALING ROAD NAVIGATIONAL ESSENTIALS.

NO

FUCK. honestly just FUCK. We missed a very important day yesterday.

what was yesterday, cat?

I’m not missing it this year.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

This is exactly how the women in the Shrek series are. I love it.