@dontron-9000 <- rottmnt turt blog here ❤️💜💙🧡
sheepfilms
Mike Driver
Sweet Seals For You, Always

#extradirty
$LAYYYTER

taylor price
d e v o n
Show & Tell
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Sade Olutola
AnasAbdin
will byers stan first human second
Keni
NASA
wallacepolsom

Kiana Khansmith
Monterey Bay Aquarium
noise dept.

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@hoodiefox
@dontron-9000 <- rottmnt turt blog here ❤️💜💙🧡

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When cats put their whole body into making a sound. Only to be squeak.
something something extremely sexy when magic users resort to physical violence. yeah i have the power of god and anime on my side but i also have THESE HANDS. i cast Punch You In The Face. i take my magic staff through which i channel the vast energies of the elements and the cosmos and i cast Severe Concussion And Skull Fracture. casting time for xenoglossy too long, chose the quicker route of Stab You In The Throat.
why is there an upgrade button on gmail. why does twitter want me to scan my palm to get into my account. why is google a chatbot. why does the transit app make a transit app wrapped for me. why does youtube keep shoving its infinitely scrollable shortform content down my throat. why do my doctor and psychiatrist and therapist want to use an ai notetaker during our appointments. why do free trials want my credit card number. why are most scholarship websites just data brokers. how do i make capitalone stop sending me mail. why is my school making its own special chat gpt powered chatbot. why is every third video on instagram an undisclosed ad. why is nothing online real anymore. why is everything so FUCKING STUPID
No one ever tell me anything bad about the person who runs this account.
the person who runs this account, Katie Gouldin, is an evolutionary biologist who has an EXCELLENT podcast called Creature Feature which compares and contrasts the weird behaviors of man and beast! she is super cute and funny too!
oh thank GOD
just want to add i love how much she hates elon
yeah okay ill reblog that
She is also credited by the Audubon society with coining the word “birb”
Also source for probably the best reaction image in history:

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Spin the wheel. That's who's trying to kill you.
Spin the wheel again. That’s who’s trying to protect you.
(If you have zero idea about a name you got, spin until you see someone you recognize.)
Are you safe?
Absolutely not. I'm dead. 100% dead.
I might stay alive, but it'll be a really close thing.
I'll take some hits, for certain, but I should be okay in the end.
A few attacks might get through, but nothing concerning.
The attacker might be able to get in one lucky hit. If that.
I am the opposite of worried. I'm 100% safe.
…Look. I've tried picturing this. But I honestly don't know how to answer.
(I've run this poll twice before, expanding it significantly for the second run. With about a year passed since that second run, I thought it was time to add another couple hundred names to the list and have another go.)
replica by alessio carnevali // st. mary magdalene from the santa lucia triptych, painted c1470 by carlo crivelli
Absolutely losing my mind over this
Let's be on a boat on mama

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they told me not to get lost in the weeds, but these are lush, beautiful, and ecologically necessary native plants so it's probably fine
are non brits aware of count binface.
to give some entirely bizarre context, nigel farage (extreme cunt) has stepped down from his position as MP for clacton (due to a scandal where he received £5 million from a crypto billionaire that could have been laundered) only to run again so that he can prove people like him. and the only person running against him is count binface. who has been a staple of british politics for many years. and now the british press is forced to interview him seriously while he sits there with his binface.
For context Farage can't be prosecuted for this while not in office. His tactic is to be re-elected to show he is a man of the people beating all other parties (and therefore laws don't apply??). Other parties have chosen not to run ostensibly because it lends legitimacy to his stunt but more likely because it is a Reform stronghold and they are unlikely to challenge him anyway.
Except in the hour of need, a binface stepped up.
So either he gets in and is prosecuted, or he loses to a bin.
941.086
british history since 2000
there was so much Plant Subtext in the Plant Subtext Chapter
[ID: a photoset of a white cat playing, jumping, walking, and sitting in blue and red, and green and red lighting. /End ID]
A Funky Boy
affirmations for my printer:
you are not out of paper
you have so much paper
it’s okay to function as intended
you are not out of ink
i just refilled that cartridge last month
you can connect to that computer you’re supposed to connect to
you’re allowed to print things

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my family has had some pretty interesting encounters with psychics/mediums that seem genuine in the past, but nothing will ever be funnier to me than the last guy my mom talked to who was so definitely bullshitting, because she said "I was hoping to hear from my husband" and the guy went "he said....it's okay to Move On" and like. every single person my mom has recounted this too has been like "He Would Not Fucking Say That". as if this was an ooc fanfic about my father. it's just so fucking funny. fake psychic dude take your shitty headcanons about my ghost dad and LEAVE!!!
like, my parents were legitimately insane about each other. I cannot stress how much he wouldn't say that. I have to assume his ghost was standing right next to this fake psychic yelling "WHAT THE FUCK!!!!" when he told my mom to move on lmfao
actually. funnier to imagine he was a Real Psychic who was just trying to put a move on my mom and didn't think the ghost would do anything about it and now is now dealing with a violently angry haunting for the rest of his days lmfao
this psychic for the rest of his life all because he tried to hit on some dead guy's wife in an elevator
Ghost Dad: WE LITERALLY CHANGED OUR VOWS BECAUSE WE DIDN'T LIKE "TILL DEATH DO US PART"
Psychic: he says you need a real man. a tangible one. a man visible to the average eye.
Psychic: I also choose this guy’s still-alive wife.