Greetings!

You are allowed to find things hot in theory while also never wanting to actually do them in real life btw. You can get off on whatever wild shit in your imagination and still prefer to be very vanilla in real life. Or not want to have sex at all in real life. You don't owe the universe anything in exchange for your dirty mind.

(begging you to get me started) UGH don't get me started.......

(no beers in) So how do you perceive me in the privacy of your thoughts

“Your days are numbered” yeah it’s called a calendar you fucking idiot.

a squirrel or perhaps a cardinal posted this

reblog w the song lyrics in your head NOW. either stuck in yr head or what yr listening to

I got an alert for an abducted baby this morning, which is obviously terrible and I hope they find it safe and sound, but they described the baby as having "blue eyes and Bald hair" and i can't stop thinking about it

Bald hair

i literally love saying "ON IT BOSS!!!!!" whenever someone asks me to do something like i'm some sort of henchman. it doesn't matter if they're my boss or not for real even because in the moment they are, and whatever they requested of me i'm on it

do u think that angels having sex with humans was seen as like beastiality in angel-world

do you think that when you reach the gates of heaven they’ll show you this post 

bold of you to presume I can die

Pretty sure they actually answer this in the bible and the answer is yes. The whole ‘Lucifer and the lesser angels want have free will’ part has the ‘angels also wanting to be gendered so they can be with humans’ part in it.

god was kinkshaming satan

God got a virgin pregnant without consent, he can mind his business

She did consent tho, like, that’s a whole thing, I’ve been in masses where the main focus was Mary’s Yes. It didn’t happen without warning, an angel was literally like “hey my pal up there is thinking u should birth his humansona” and she was like “that’d be an honor”

I didn’t claw my way out of hell just to be sent back there by reading the word Humansona,

[recommending something i sincerely love] ok so the thing about it is it kinda sucks

The fact of the matter is that I do not want to do it

"do what?" you might wonder. well. [gestures broadly]