Hi!

efforts towards a "positive vision of masculinity" or whatever are so funny because what these guys are trying to figure out is literally "what's a way of being a good person that's Not For Girls™"

unemployed girl is a species of creature that needs twelve hours sleep every day and six to eight hours of cuddles and maybe something else

men really be like “well this woman has studied this subject her whole life, and i am a man, so we have equal knowledge on this”

it’s ok you could have just said “i hate men”

okay, i hate men

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if i wake up at a reasonable hour, the website greets me with wet heavy. if i get out of bed well past noon feeling like sludge, i get justin bieber penis gnome. i can always count on them both being there around roughly the same times every day. my two beloved neighbors Wet Heavy and JB Penis Gnome

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your 20s are about elves, your 30s are about continued meditations on the elf

once you hit your 40s it's time to find an elf

Fuck I hate elves god damm it

you've got 2 years left of that but then you have to make some changes

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