From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free

netflix is making a hockey show called "the sticks" that is based on a very real tragedy that occured in canada in 2018.

the show follows a minnesota high school team after their bus crashes and coming back to hockey afterwards.

in 2018, the humboldt broncos' (a junior A team made up of 18-22 year olds) bus was hit by a tractor trailer on a highway intersection. 16 people (10 players, 2 coaches, and 4 team staff members) were killed, along with 13 other players severely injured.

the memory of the humboldt broncos crash is an incredibly sensitive subject carrying a lot of trauma to both the survivors, their families, and deceased's families. the trajectory of hockey in canada was changed significantly after this tragedy.

despite this, netflix has decided to make a show using the death of young hockey players for profit. they did not consult the survivors, nor the deceased's families. they stole a canadian story for a feel-good cash grab.

None of the families even knew about this show until the media started asking how they felt.

It is taking a tragedy and turning it into a cash cow.

This was such a deeply-felt issue that even the truck driver pleaded guilty and has tried to make amends. (And as he is facing deportation after his sentence, some of the families have even started supporting him being allowed to stay in the country.) There is a real story you could be telling about community and resilience that is not just turning one of the worst days for THE NATION into cheap thrills and sensationalism.

some context on this would be appreciated because i've been reading for years about guys who literally say they have/had addiction to porn and used it as an unhealthy coping mechanism that had negative impacts on their perception of women, relationship prospects, and even to their own body as their masturbation became dependent on it. they have whole programs and support groups and self help books modeled after substance abuse treatments and therapies with varying success. porn site comment sections are filled with people who talk about their unhealthy porn habit like it's smoking and how they wish they could quit but can't. i'm a weeb so specifically i've seen this a lot in hentai circles.

Most of the programs, self-help, etc are (usually faith-based) organizations taking advantage of this shame to make money. I'm sure plenty of people who believe they're addicted to porn would really benefit from therapy, but they need therapy to work through their shame, not therapy to make them more ashamed.

Below are a couple of links. One's got a pretty clear write up of a study, and the other is the study itself, which is a meta-analysis of past studies (this is when you use data from a bunch of other studies to paint a bigger picture, and it can also be helpful for seeing if what the authors claimed they proved was actually supported by the evidence and if their results line up with others'). The abstract tells you a lot about the study, but unfortunately the rest is behind a paywall. There are ways around that if you want to really dig deep into the study.

when you think you may struggling with any kind of compulsive or dependent behaviour, it's easy to get caught up in the question of "am i an addict??" and stay stuck in that cycle of thought. 12-step (AA, NA, etc) rhetoric about one NEEDING to "accept that they are an addict" in order to be "ready for change", etc has done a lot of damage in this regard. unfortunately it often just leads to toxic shame, defensiveness, and a focus on one's perceived moral failings, which ironically makes it much harder to create meaningful changes in behaviour.

compulsive behaviour and addictions are not moral failings. even if "porn addiction" were proven to be real, and you were proven to have it, it would still not be a moral failing. free yourself from this question and focus on the specifics of YOUR situation and YOUR needs!

if you feel shame from watching porn, and/or if you feel that it's interfering with your life, HOW exactly? WHEN do you feel the desire to watch porn? how do you feel during? how do you feel after? what need is it fulfilling for you? (this is key to ask when dealing with drug addiction, as well!)

a few examples of how you could reflect on these questions, and what actions you could take:

SCENARIO 1: you seek out porn when you're horny. you enjoy it, but feel shame and disgust afterwards. REFLECTION: you realize that you have a dopamine crash after masturbating that leads to sex repulsion, and also some shame about the kink content you seek out. ACTION: you practice some alternative affirmations to focus on for when the disgust and shame kicks in—for example, "i enjoyed this content a few minutes ago, but now i feel repulsed. it's normal to want different things in different moments, and i can come back to this content when i want it again." over time, these affirmations feel less forced and more natural. you connect with the kink community in your area or online to talk through some internalized shame about your fetishes.

SCENARIO 2: you seek out porn when you're bored. sometimes it feels fulfilling, but sometimes you scroll endlessly and feel disgusted and stuck. you find yourself reflexively seeking out porn when you're not in the mood for it, and spending time on it that you'd rather spend on other hobbies. REFLECTION: you realize that sometimes you seek out porn when you're understimulated and looking for a dopamine rush, but it doesn't always fulfill your needs, leading to the "stuck" feeling. ACTION: you practice recognizing when you're in a dopamine-chasing mood, and taking a moment to stop and think about what your options are. you move the app you use to watch porn to a less visible location on your phone, so it becomes harder to mindlessly click on it. this leads to you looking at porn a little less often, so you feel less numbed to its effects, and can enjoy it with more intention and fulfillment.

SCENARIO 3: you seek out porn when you're feeling down. it often successfully distracts you and makes you feel better, though sometimes it feels empty. you find yourself automatically turning to porn to deal with difficult emotions, and find it hard to self-regulate when you can't access porn. REFLECTION: distraction is an effective method of making yourself feel better, but sometimes it keeps you from fully feeling your feelings and practicing other methods of self-regulation. you have a deeper need of wanting someone to be there for you when you're sad, and porn is something that is always there for you in a way that other people aren't. ACTION: you use self-help resources, friends, or a therapist to learn and practice other methods of self-regulation. you work on reaching out for help when you're in need. you learn about self-abandonment and practice being there for yourself and your emotions. porn becomes just one of many tools in your toolbox for when you're upset.

bottom line: regardless of your real and perceived relationship to porn, you can heal shame and understand yourself better when you see your habits as a result of your needs. no one's behaviour is completely random; it's based on real needs and what has worked for them in the past! and if you feel that what's worked for you in the past isn't serving you anymore, you have the power to reflect and start making small changes anytime.

if you actually understood Palestine for what it is (the theft of land, resources, colonialism, indigenous resistance, anti imperialism), you can see the connecting lines everywhere. In my opinion, this should be the most crucial info you carry in any Palestine activism you do - Palestine is not unique and that’s what makes it so horrifying. As a Palestinian I really implore people to reject any sort of exceptionalism, its incredibly harmful to other victims of genocide (most notably I see this with Sudan, DRC, and it reeks of anti-blackness) and its harmful to us as Palestinians as well. There is literally nothing to be gained from pointing at other genocides and going ‘well this one is worse’.

The world of shut doors of countless walls.

-- Garous Abdolmalekian

The Grammys didn’t create that “Best Asian Music” category this year to be diverse. They did it to continue boxing non English speaking artists but especially BTS, so they won’t have to nominate them in the main categories with the rest of their peers. This was the Grammys telling BTS they’ll give them a Grammy win but under their own boxed category. We give you the scraps and you are supposed to take them. They said no.

They’ve been doing this for years under the disguise of diversity. “Best Traditional Country Album” a new category introduced after Beyoncé won in the Best Country Album category because they couldn’t stand a non white artist redefining that genre. “Best African Music” being introduced in 2024 to keep Tyla away from other pop girls. And “Best Latin Song” being introduced for this year along with Best Asian Music after Bad Bunny right fully dominated all of the charts last year.