♡ 𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐥 𝐜𝐚𝐢𝐧 ♡

nightmares EP out everywhere, 10/31/18

i wrote this song after a drive down to miami on a very dreary day last december with my best friend. we had to get off the interstate because my tire was about to explode and wound up driving down the highway towards lake okechobee taking random side roads every now and then for fun. we stumbled across a tiny community called miracle village near the edge of the lake and it was a very eerie experience. i wondered what it must feel like, to live there alone on what felt like the edge of the earth with the most shame you could possibly carry as a human being.

i recorded half of punish on my phone. the piano, the creaks of a swing set in the park in the middle of the night, the backing vocals. i wanted it to feel up close and personal, almost inappropriate. i made quite a few different versions of it before i settled on this one. i’m glad it resonates with all of you. i took this pic the night i wrote it :)

thank u all for listening! ♡

i recorded this at my parents’ house a few months ago on their piano. it’s about a girl i knew as a kid who died when we were in highschool.

lyrics:

she was heavenly, my ethel

but she made a deal with the devil, my ethel

she held tight to her youth and beauty, my ethel

until he pried it from the cold dead hands of my ethel

i close my eyes and count to three, she’s no more

she’s bleeding out, cradled in the driver’s door

i asked for far too much, i’ll take no more

I made this at like 3 am and I don’t know why, help??