I feel like nobody knows how much love my heart can give. Maybe I don't seem like the type of person who has a potential to do things that take a lot of effort, time and patience. I feel like I'm not a good friend. Maybe I just need someone to be with me so I won't feel alone or I won't look like a loner. Maybe I was never really there for my "friends" whenever they needed me. Maybe I don't know how to be a friend. I feel like I'm a very selfish person. Maybe everytime I say "more for others, less for self", I just never really meant it. Maybe I only say that so I could feel better when I give too much to everyone to the point that I barely have some for myself. Maybe I never even "barely had some for myself", maybe I'm just exaggerating or maybe I'm too sensitive to think that. I feel like I'm not worthy. Maybe I don't deserve the love I receive from everyone. My friends, my family, my partner and our God. I feel like I just pray because I want something. Maybe I never really talk to God. Or maybe not anymore? I miss talking to God. Just telling him about things, about whatever falls under the sun. I feel like the only time I talk to him nowadays is when I feel bad or whenever I don't understand things. I call His name and say "Oh my God, I'M SAD", "Oh my God, THIS IS TOO HARD", "Oh my God, THIS IS A LOT", "Oh my God, I'M SO TIRED", "Oh my God, WHY NOT?", "Oh my God, I CAN'T DO THIS", "Oh my God, ITS TOO PAINFUL". Now I want to say "Oh my God, I'm sorry". I know You love me. I know You're there always, just waiting for me to talk to You. I know I never leave your sight no matter how far I walk away from You. I know how much You know about me, even my limits, even the day when I surrender everything that burdens me and hinders me from turning and running back to you. I know that You are always ready to give me a hug and that You're just always always ALWAYS waiting for me to long for it, to ask for it because You know I always need it. Now I want to say "Oh my God, thank You so much" because You never failed to believe in me and You never complained about everything I throw at You that caused You pain! Thank You so for Your love that is incomparable for it is divine and real! Now I want to say "Oh my God, I love You"