in2 the pit

After a little back and forth I’m not thrilled - but I decided to make another donation post now. As a lot of you know things went rough for me over christmas and new years where I went batshit crazy and was hospitalized for two weeks during a psychotic breakdown. Semi unrelated to that the club I used to work for had to shut down shortly after I got out of the clinic so I was also out of a job. Even though in the aftermath of all this mess my struggles with suicidal thoughts and depression are skyrocketing the house and I’m in the midst of switching and adjusting medication, I had no choice to go back to my old retail job that I was endlessly eager to leave like one and a half years ago. Currently in the process of getting more hours but that will very likely take at least another few weeks

If you’ve been following me for a while you probably also know that I used to be in a huge lease trap where I got blindsided by hefty bills year after year when I was still living alone in my first apartment. That shit truly financially scarred me long lasting and I’ve been basically living in the red for the last 6 years now. With recent events though shit really spiraled out of control and at I had to borrow 1k from my parents and other smaller amounts from friends in order to avoid getting my bank account shut down. All money that I’ll definitely have to start paying back (as) soon (as I can). And that still leaves me around -1000€ in debt on my account.

On top of that I’ll also have to find a new room in a month and a half because my sublet is ending and with the majority of offers demanding big ass deposits shit just looks disheartening right now.

So basically my entire life has been and is currently crashing down on me. I really hope I’ll figure it out eventually and I’m usually not one to lean on others for help too much but at the same time given the situation I’m in I also have to learn to open my mouth and ask for support where it’s needed.

If you have any spare penny to help me manuver myself out of the bullshit: My paypal is [email protected] but you can also hit this link: paypal.me/rhythmia2

No matter how small the contribution - literally any amount is greatly appreciated and will help as things can easily add up. Even by only sharing this you’d also obviously contribute a huge part. Still nobody needs to feel obligated to take part in this - I’m just shooting my shot here: Anyone who participates is insanely appreciated but nothing is demanded or expected. Especially in times of co-vid where literally everyone seems to be struggling. 

Kapital 2007 ‘Denim Monster II’.

萩原 卓哉／Hagihara Takuya