Her Secret

Mijo.

I had just finished my work for today with Black Pyramid when I got a text from Chris saying meet him at the crib. After grabbing some food, I headed over to his house. “Yoo” I yelled through the house as I looked around.

“Uncle Mi!” I heard my Sa’mai yelled in excitement as she ran up to me.

“Munchkin” I smiled scooping her in my arms, carrying her to the living room where Chris sat watching cartoons. “Sup bro” I shook his hand, before sitting next to him. He looked focused and confused, like something heavy was on his mind but he couldn’t explain it.

“You need to talk with Sabrina” he mumbled.

“What? No the fuc-“

“Yes the fuck you do!” he snapped. “Nigga this shit almost cost me my marriage, I’ve been lying to my wife for weeks now and I got this ugly motherfucker lying saying I’m fooling’ with Sabrina because I’m helping her out”

“Wait … why you helping her?”

“She’s the mother of my niece and she didn’t move back here, she only came back so you could spend time with Alana which you haven’t done. I just pay the hotel bill”

“Nobody asked you to though”

I should learn how to shut up sometimes, Chris snapped.

“Nigga that’s family, Sabrina always been family! You forgot? Nigga yall both made Alana, not just her. You acting like she wants you, nigga she don’t and never did. She just wants Alana to know her father; you lucky she hasn’t to you to court; you acting like a real bitch right now bro, for real” he yelled smacking my hat off my head and storming to the kitchen.

I took a deep breath, letting his words sink in and he was right. Sabrina doesn’t deserve this and neither does Alana. Back in the day I had the biggest crush on Sabrina, she was so close to our family because her mom was like my aunt. I, she and Chris all grew up together. We didn’t start fooling around until high school, we took each other virginities. After the first time we agreed to stay friends but to keep having sex as a secret, she only told her best friend and I only told Chris.

Before she left to Texas we had a long time and expressed how much we cared for one another but only as friends, she even knew about my feelings for Jaz and told me to pursue her.

When she hit me up and told me she was pregnant I just asked if the baby was mine and it pissed her off, I went to all the doctors’ appointments via ft and even flew out a few times, she did tell me she’d come back so that Alana could be born in the same city as us and I was there for that too. I even named her. Crazy right? Why would I be there then leave? Because I didn’t know how Jaz would accept it and just thinking about it makes my heart ache, I chose my girlfriend over my daughter. Fuck kind of man am I? I fucking coward that’s who. I loved my daughter more than life itself and I have to fix it.

I walked in the kitchen. “You right and I know I have to fix it, I just don’t know how” I shrugged.

“First talk to Sabrina, she’s only here for another week before she heads back to Texas and then two weeks after that its Alana-“

“I know, her birthday” my baby girl is about to be three years old and knowing I missed two birthdays kills me.

“Oh and you have to explain everything to Jaz. Alana is a blessing, not a secret” I nodded and reached in for a hug. “Love you man, you got this” I nodded and said goodbye before heading back home. Jaz was out with Ariana, so I was going to call Sabrina and try to start to fix things.

  Sabrina.

I was lying in bed, watching tv when my phone started to ring. I quickly grabbed it so it wouldn’t wake up Alana. ‘Unknown’ I mumbled to myself with a confused face. I pressed the green button and was met with his voice. “Please don’t hang up” he pleaded.

I wasn’t upset with Barry, just disappointed. I understand that me being pregnant wasn’t a part of the plan and I will never say or discredit him for being there for me when I was pregnant and constantly flying back and forth, however; he disappeared from her life and I haven’t received a call or text in two years. Our daughter will be three and she doesn’t know him which isn’t my fault.

“Yes Barry”

“Can we meet and talk … please?”

“Sure, where?”

“Ice cream shop it’s about ten minutes from your hotel”

“Okay, see you soon” I hung up and went to grab Alana.

----

“I know that I’ve fucked up and I’m a coward for leaving after she was born, I wouldn’t blame you if you hated me. And no excuse will ever be good enough, I’m just begging that you will allow me into her life now and I swear on my life, I’ll never leave it again”

I just nodded, taking everything in. I always thought about this moment and now that it’s here, I’m happy for Alana. I just want her to have a great relationship with her dad. Just like I do with mine.  “Okay, I’ll let you win but I have a few rules” he nodded.

“Alana is not a secret, so you have to tell jasmine. Second, she can stay the night if she’s comfortable but not in the same bed as you two, that’s weird. Lastly, if Jasmine wants to spend alone time with her, we must meet first”

My rules weren’t crazy, but I was a mother and even though Jaz seemed sweet, I still wanted to meet the woman who’d be around my daughter.

“Okay, that’s fine” he agreed and we shook on it. For the remainder of the evening he played with Lana and we took her to the playground, she loved every minute of it and I think she knew who Berry was even after all this time. After she was born I also made him do skin to skin contact with her, she must have recognized his heart beat and voice.

Jaz.

As I walked in the house from a long day of relaxing with my best friend, I see Mijo sitting on the couch with his head between his lap and his hands covering his face. His body language alone told me that something was wrong.

“Babe, you okay? Did something happen today?”

Ariana.

It was three in the morning and I couldn’t sleep, I was off; more off than usual. I tossed and turned in bed for the first few hours and now I’m just laying here with all these thoughts going through my head. I looked over and to my surprise Mai was not lying next to me, shaking my head I got up and headed down stairs. There’s only one place she would be.

Slowly I tip toed down both steps, walking down to the basement where I hear light snores. Walking in a little further there was she, laying on her father’s chest sleeping so peacefully. I couldn’t help but smile at them, this was my family.

For a brief second all the drama washed away and I was happy again, but looking at Chris for a second too long shook all my happiness away. I didn’t know what or who to believe. One on hand, Chris was my husband, the love of my life, my life partner and soul mate; he could never betray me like that. But then again this women had screenshots, she had evidence and honestly; it made sense. I was confused and that pissed me off more than anything.

I looked at them again before turning on my heels to head back to my room. “There’s room for you too ArI” Chris spoke softly, as he rubbed Mai’s back. I just looked and shook my head no. I know shutting him out isn’t going to help anything but I couldn’t help it. Just the thought of Chris with someone else make me sick to my stomach.

I walked through our house, all of our pictures. How did we get here? All the love, all the fighting to be together. Him going away, his ex, the media; we fought through it all and for what? To get a divorce and Mai spend half her time with Mommy and the other half with Daddy? Us having to explain why we’re no long together when she ask and trying to date other people? I didn’t want that for my family, for myself or my daughter.

                                        The Next Morning

  Chris.

“Daddy Daddy!” Sa’mai yelled jumping on the bed, waking me up. I rubbed my sleepy eyes, before grabbing her smile body and attacking her with kisses. She giggled, “Daddy, you silly” I smiled and kissed her cheek.

“What’s that smile Mai Mai?” I questioned.

She giggled. “Mommy made breakfestttt!” she said excited.

I mushed my eyebrows together confused, she hasn’t cooked breakfast in weeks. I grabbed Mai and headed upstairs. Once reaching the kitchen, I saw Ari humming as she did her little dance while flipping pancakes. “Mommy!” Mai yelled getting her attention, she looked over and smiled.

“Good morning princess, look what mommy cooked for you and Daddy” she slightly smiled at me, before grabbing Mai and sitting her in the high chair. She passed her, her food before speaking to me.

She motioned for me to sit first. “I know I’ve been cold and I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have shut you out, there’s no excuse for that. You are my husband and we exchanged vows, however you said no secrets and clearly there is a secret, so get to explaining Christopher”

Well damn, I looked at her surprised. I wasn’t expecting all this today, but I’m glad she’s finally talking to me and I’m glad she’s being understanding about the whole situation. She had every right to be mad and she is, there is a secret.

“The secret is that, yes I was texting her and meeting up with her but only to give her money. But not for sex or anything and we never did anything physical and she’s never met our daughter, I’d never do that to you”

“Who is she Chris? One of your old jump offs?” she rolled her eyes and I chuckled, white people should not say jump off.

“No she’s not, she’s more so an old family friend”

“But I’ve never seen her” she looked confused and this is where things get messy, but I can’t keep hiding a secret that’s not mine.

“I was giving her money because she does have a kid but it’s not mine; its Mijo’s and he still hasn’t taken a DNA test so she reached out to me and the little girl looks just like him, of course it’s his. He’s just being stupid because he’s afraid of losing Jaz-“

“He should be, he cheated on her Chris” Ari raised her voice.

“No he didn’t Ariana, that little girl was born 6 months before they got together, they were just sex buddies. They cut ties before she was leaving California and Mijo finally wanted to pursue Jaz, she came back right before her due date and she’s been trying to speak with him ever since. She told him everything in a text and he won’t respond to her. It’s fucked up and I shouldn’t help him, but I’m doing it because Sabrina is honestly a nice person and their daughter is my niece.”

Was I wrong for not telling Ari about this? Of course I was but I knew she’d tell Jaz and then everything would blow up, I honestly don’t understand why my idiot cousin won’t just come clean and finally take care of his responsibilities as a father. Alana is such a beautiful little girl, so happy and full of life. She reminds me of Sa’mai.

“Chris … this is a lot” she mumbled, I knew I was asking a lot of Ari to believe me but this was the truth. “Wait, not to sound rude or anything, but why does she need the money?”

I chuckled. “Honestly she doesn’t, she’s a nurse. Like I said she only came here to be honest with Mijo and so that he could be a father to their child, she lives in Texas and I’m just helping. I only pay for the hotel and sometimes when I go shopping for Mai, Ill grab something for Alana too”

I was turning soft but I couldn’t help it.

“Awe, Chris” Ari smiled as she walked over to me and kissed my cheek.

“Baby I know it looks bad, but honestly I’m just helping family” I spoke.

“So Sabrina isn’t the one threating us?” she questioned.

“No, it’s her ex. She was with him after Mijo but she cut ties with him once she found out she was pregnant. She thought he took it well, but clearly not. He’s the one that’s been following her and took those pictures”

“Can I meet her?”

“Ariana if I say yes, please don’t say a word to Jaz. I know she’s family but let me talk to Barry again” I pleaded and she understood. I nodded and patted her thigh.

“Chris … I love you” she whispered.

”So today we have two special guest here today … They are both international superstars and they shocked the world two years ago with not only their relationship but also their child and if that didn’t shock they world, they also got married. Ladies and gentlemen Ariana Grande and Chris Brown are here!” Big boy yelled into the mic. Chris and Ari both chuckled shyly, while holding hands under the table.

“So  ... How have you guys been? It’s been awhile” Big boy smiled.

“We’ve been good man, living life. Being a husband, and a dad now is a lot but I love it. I wouldn’t trade it for the world” Chris smiled gripping Ari’s hand tighter. She shyly smiled and nodded agreeing with him.

“Well that’s great, so how is the little one?”

“She’s good, my baby is about to be two” Ari frowned. She couldn’t believe that her little baby was basically a toddler. It didn’t feel like two years had passed.

“Awe, mama Grande” Big Boy teased. “And how are you Miss Lady?”

“I’m great, I’ve been writing and working while also being a mommy” she smiled.

“Can I just say that you two really are an awesome couple. Like when I heard I didn’t believe it but then I seen you two together and the video, I was like ‘damn! They are great’ you know” Big boy raved. They both smiled and thanked him. After a lot of hate, they were getting many compliments.

“Thank you man, you know the first year for us wasn’t easy. I mean we both got so much backlash and rude comments but we knew it would come. Now we don’t have much and I think it’s because of our daughter and that I’m married now”

“I think people are finally seeing what we saw all these years, a good person who was struggling; that’s all” Ari commented. Chris was never perfect and that’s what she loved about him, he never tried to act like he was something or someone else.

“Most defiantly” Chris agreed.

---

After ending the interview with Big Boy, Chris and Ari headed back home. The car ride was silent, Samai was sleep and Ari was busy on her phone. Chris was in the day’s trying to figure out exactly where things went wrong with his relationship. He knew, he just couldn’t believe this was happening.

“Mijo and Jas will be over later” Ari said. He looked at her and shook his head, she was so cold towards him now and he could only blame himself or the world for the constant lies. Sighing to himself he tried grabbing her hand so they could talk but she quickly moved and got out the car with Mai in her car seat. He looked around realizing they were now home.

Getting out the car, he pulled up his pants and followed behind her. Once inside she headed upstairs and Chris went downstairs to his man cave and also bed room for the time being. Ari kicked him two weeks ago and he was hating every minute of it.

---

“How’ve you been?” Jas asked her best friend.

“Good” Ari smiled, Jas believed it but Ari was lying through her teeth. Her life wasn’t good, it was horrible right now but she couldn’t tell that Jas or anyone for that matter. Things between her and Chris were at a standstill, she didn’t know what to do but one thing she wasn’t going to do was give up on her marriage. She made a vowel and was going to stick to it until death do them part.  

She was hurting and wanted help. She never saw this coming and she had no clue what to do. She didn’t even know if she could trust Chris anymore, which is why he’s in his man cave. She prayed hard for a sign but couldn’t find one. She was thankful for Mai in this time, that little girl was a big help and all she had to do was smile. She was also thankful that this news didn’t break into social media. Only she and Chris knew and things would stay that way until further notice.