#hagblogger #elderlyhood #senilehood #divinegeriatric

Priceless. Will need therapy.

help; my wife put on lipstick and told me to come close so she can blot the excess off. i thought she was gonna ask me for a tissue but then she just started kissing my face and now theres lipstick all over me

reblog to bonk prev with yr forehead like a cat

tshirt that says I HAD POTENTIAL

I suggest getting angrier about misogyny.

"at least be nice about-" no. Girl. Kill him over it. We're done. It's been centuries of this bullshit since time immemorial and he hasn't learned. Obliterate him.

severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person

the thing about evangelizers is that it is fundamentally rude to walk up to strangers and try to convince them to change religions, but even non/loose christians who don't evangelize don't understand this

Look, I understand that we might seem rude from your point of view. But from our point of view we are literally trying to save your life.

"might seem rude" and its advocating for a white supremacist's colonizer religion that you dress up in paternalistic saviorite "you dont know how much danger youre in, i know more about your problems than you do" but if someone flips the script on you worthless niggas and says hey dont be christian! youre not actually happy contributing to the continued death and flattening of multiple cultures and belief systems all in service of a singular patriarchal god who has a REALLY bad track record of stopping genocide or literally like. almost any suffering. then suddenly SUDDENLYYYYYYYY you losers are actually being persecuted and discriminated against and youre just being niiiiice. youre just being so nice. save your bullshit for someone who cares.

something decidedly unchic is afoot

it’s a beautiful day to check out a book from the library

if you're not 26 years old right now you will be soon

It's literally like. Well what if your career was also a beautiful woman you could have sex with.

Okay so what if you had fallen into the very common trap of making your career the load bearing pillar of all meaning in your life and your sole source of self esteem. But also your job was inherently religious in nature. Now also imagine God was a beautiful woman and she wanted to have sex with you. Now imagine y'all broke up.

"well I think that would fuck me up a little bit" yeah. Yeah it probably would.

Now imagine you were pregnant with an incredibly powerful bomb.