Persephone: itās the most wonderful time of the year :)
Hades: with all the souls screaming
Hera: I bet Zeus is still cheating
Zeus: canāt we just be good cheers :(
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@hellspersephone
Persephone: itās the most wonderful time of the year :)
Hades: with all the souls screaming
Hera: I bet Zeus is still cheating
Zeus: canāt we just be good cheers :(

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Persephone: WOKE UP NOT GETTING CHEATED ON
Persephone: some of these girls can't relate. yikes.
Hades: period.
Hades: do you remember? the 21st night of December? because that when my fucking wife comes home.
Hermes: thatās not how the song goes-
Hades: shut. up.
Hermes: and itās only Sep-
Hades: is it your goal to join the souls today, nephew?
Demeter: every day we get closer and closer to my daughter decending back into the pits of hell.
Hades: :)
āThe story of Hades and Persephone is an abusive tale-ā Me:

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Hermes: people are DYING Uncle! You must return Persephone to the surface at once.
Hades: this is so sad Alexa play despacito
Her Mother Always Questioned Her
Demeter frowned as she watched her daughter fan herself with one hand, an irritable expression on her face as she scratched her head with the other hand.
She has been doing this often as of late and Demeter couldnāt quite understand why. She glanced up at the sun. Perhaps, she was sick? But how could she be sick from the sun?
āWould you like to cool off, dear?ā Demeter questioned, Persephone finally turning towards her mother.
Persephone gave a small smile, āYes, that would be nice. Do you mind if I cool off in the shade for a bit?ā
Demeter shook her head, āGo on.ā
Persephone nodded her head greatfully before walking in the direction of the large tree. She let out a sigh of relief as soon as the cool shade touched her skin and a smile soon crept onto her lips.
āIncredible acting, dear.ā A voice whispered in her ear. She soon felt a cold pair of arms wrap around her.
āIf I keep this up sheās going to find out.ā Persephone laughed.
āLet her.ā Hades responded with a small laugh as he enjoyed the feeling of his wifeās skin against his own.
Hades: I AM HADES
Hades: LORD OR THE UNDERWORLD
Hades: RULER OF THE DEAD
Hades: FEAR ME
Hades: THOU SHALL BOW BEFORE THY LEADER
Hades: ... how was that?
Hades: I sounded pretty tough right?
Persephone: *peers over phone as she strokes a sleeping Cebrus*
Persephone: I nearly pissed myself. That was amazing. Top notch.
Hades: *fist bumps the air before sitting in his fluffy pink chair*
Hades: nailed it.
Aphrodite: have you ever noticed that Hades big feet
Aphrodite: and you know what they say about big feet
Persephone: the bigger the feet the bigger the realm, the bigger the realm the more souls you have the watch, the more souls you have to watch the more you want to DIE because you realize you actually live in HELL.
Persephone: so yes Iāve heard about what they say about big feet.
GO š THE š FUCK š OFF. Also, the American educational system is trash. I applaud this childās parents for giving her a voice and standing up against bias authority.
(Can someone caption this?)
Classroom full of mostly black and brown students:
Black student: [unintelligibleāand then] Ā ā¦and then throwing everything away beneath it because it doesnāt pertain to you. Iām sorry ā
White teacher: āyou know what, Iām sorry -Iām sorryā¦
Black student: āNo, no, noā¦I let you talk -I let you talk, youāre gonna let me talk.
[Other students gasps]
White student: Go ahead. Finish.
Black student: Iām sorry that this is the way that it is. Youāre right, it is fucked up. But white people control everythingā¦and thatās not fair. And when anybody, any other minority tries to say anything about it or change it, weāre complaining or weāre ungrateful or all this other stuff because we still have this or that. But then you say something aboutĀ āOh, I donāt wantāthereās too many Latinos and thereās too manyāā
White teacher: I didnāt say thatā
[Various students disagree]
White teacher: I said I want to control the border!
Black student: You said you donāt want this to turn into a Latin country because thereāll be too manyĀ
White teacher: I did not say that.
[Various students disagree]
Student 2: You said you want to preserve the American culture.
Black student: There is no American culture. American culture is EVERYTHING.
[Various students agree]
Random: Mayonnaise!
[Students laugh]
Black student: And because you are white and so closed-minded, you refuse to accept that, you refuse to acceptā
White teacher: Donāt tell me Iām closed-mindedā
Black student: Everything youāve said to me is closed-minded.
White teacher: Just because I donāt agree with you doesnāt mean Iām closed-minded.
Black student: You donāt need to agreeāI -Iāve had conversations with people that donāt agree with me, but if they at least listen and try to acceptāyouāre not accepting the truth.
White teacher: Why do I have to accept what you think is right?
Black student: You need to accept the truth! Not what I think is right, what is actually happening rightā
White teacher: Well, let me tell you what I think. You said white people have been in control of everythingā¦.who is the president of the United States right now?!
Students: A black man!
*Various sounds of incredulity*
Black student: WITH A WHITE CONGRESS! WITH A WHITE SENATE! WITH WHITE EVERYTHING ELSE! HE DOESNāT HAVE THE CONTROL OF EVERYTHING!
Random: GO OFFĀ
Other Random: GO OFFā
*The class is in an uproar*
Random student: YOU ARE SO PRIVILEGED THAT YOU JUST DONāT SEE IT!
White teacher: Do we have to yell?!
Black student: Yes, because Iām mad.

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Hades: Demeter has her daughter and the world is still covered in ice.
Hades: you didnāt hear this from me but Demeter is a bitch.
Hermes: if you see BeyoncƩ you respond with?
Hades: um... edges?
Hermes: wrong.
Zeus: kween.
Hermes: close but no cigar.
Poseidon: wig.
Hermes: exactly. Mariah Carey is what?
Hades: talented.
Hermes: thatās not what Iām looking for Hades.
Zeus: kween.
Hermes: your going to have to expand your vocabulary Dad.
Poseidon: a skinny legend.
Hermes: PERCICE! Last question. You see someone you donāt like on your time line, what do you say?
Hades: be gone wicked witch.
Hermes: Iām so sick of you. Dad please donāt say kween.
Zeus: what fuck am I suppose to say then?
Hermes: omfg.
Poseidon: no shade but this bitch is about to catch a block. Iām tired of seeing this rat on my TL. Sheās constantly reaching, but if she keeps trying me Iāll drag a bitch and thatās the TEA
Hermes: PERFECT. YOU PASSED POSEIDON. YOUR READY FOR STAN TWITTER
Poseidon: legends only.
Zeus: Hades
Zeus: h a d e s
Zeus: HADES
Zeus: H man
Zeus: big H
Zeus: H drizzy
Persephone: you do realize Zeus is trying to speak with you.
Hades: I rather him make himself look like a fool.
Zeus: the notrious H.A.D.... Es.
Hades: well, a bigger fool than he already is.
Zeus: H dawg.
Hades: ...
Hades: though Iām begginning to think thatās not possible.
Hades: is that snow I see?
Hades: spring is canceled.
Hades: give me my wife back
Persephone: people think Iām crazy because I talk to flowers.
Persephone: in reality Iām not talking to the flowers at all.
Persephone: Hades likes to visit me on the surface world during the spring.
Persephone: he hides in the shadows of the flowers.
Persephone: isnāt that right husband?
Flower: *sways in the wind*
Persephone: heās a little nervous.
Persephone: he doesnāt really like people.

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Persephone: Hades, dear husband
Persephone: please let go of my leg.
Hades: :(
Persephone: the souls are staring.
Persephone: get ahold of yourself man.
Demeter: just 24 more hours and Iāll have my precious daughter back xoxoxo
Hades: choke
Hades: fucking choke
Persephone: Babe calm down
Hades: nah let her choke. Does she think this is funny? Do you not understand the depth of my depression?
Demeter: awh, are you going to cry baby brother?
Hades: c h o k e