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my nervous system is so tired

9

She laughs with her soul and loves deeply with her heart.

My health grief comes in waves, one minute I could be fine and the next I’m realizing how much I can’t do anymore and how much my life has changed. It may be in the little things, like realizing I can’t do anything for very long without symptoms popping up, or realizing that a new symptom has gone unnoticed. Sometimes it’s bigger things, like quitting a job or school, realizing I can’t take showers standing up, or that some of my hobbies have been abandoned due to how much energy they take up. I grieve at these things, sometimes I’ll crack under it all, even if it may seem small to outsiders, something as little as someone making an ignorant comment can set it off. I feel tired and sad and just utter devastation that my life has changed irreparably.