THE MILFS ARE UNIONIZING

well if mhy won’t give us an unhinged woman with no tragic backstory or woob/waifu ication then. I Will.

alice is visiting mondstadt tomorrow for her baby’s birthday ... generally she’s not good at the passage of time and reliably misses other milestones but she remembers this always

just watched the cutscene again and damn alice really blew up mondstadt’s main gate with klee ,,, queen. legend. knights Hate her.

electing 2 delete klee’s dad from the narrative btw. its a mamma mia situation w klee and good for her

(i refuse to shut up about alice) there was an inside joke a few generations back of people who knew alice of who could create the wildest rumour about her and now she’s the subject of several key pieces of mondstadt folklore, no thanks to the way a certain bard spread the stories around. 

a ‘cute’ thing that did happen when klee was a baby is that, in an effort to stop alice taking her infant blowing shit up, a fellow adventurer explained that since explosions are very loud, it must be hard on klee’s baby-elf ears to be exposed to them all the time. alice took this into account made klee some high-tech slightly magical baby earmuffs for mom and daughter bonding (she also made herself a pair. for matchies). 

alice doesn’t actually know how many elf traits klee has and how many human. physically, klee’s ears are just a bit less floppy & expressive than alice’s, but that could always be attributed to age. since most elves have left mondstadt in particular in favor cooler, rockier, and more isolated places like snezhnaya, she doesn’t really have the time or energy to consult on elf-children. for now, it seems like her genes are strong, but the real meat of this headcanon is alice has to consider that she might also outlive her daughter.

tbh against the typical immortal trope alice thinks the most fun part of mortals is that they die eventually! a real ‘if we were vampires’ situation. flowers are beautiful because they’re temporary and so are humans.

i think it’d be funny if alice was alive during the archon war and she was just like eh. i don’t wanna deal with this (stays in her rock house discovering alchemy for a millennia) 

what alice DOES have is a little cottage in mondstadt because while klee can enter and exit her rock-home as she sees fit, as a fellow elf, albedo cannot. so they have a house that’s basically a kitchen that’s just been turned into a lab and you should not light a match in there because there’s probably gunpowder on all surfaces. bedrooms are not a gunpowder free zone but klee’s bed IS. sometimes.