Hell on Heels

Headphones in, problems out.

Well, it may be a Sunday, but fuck it, who wants to get crazy tonight?

Really? Is that all you feel like doing lately?

Honestly? Yeah.

Girl you have no idea, it’s so rad. I love that they’re all liberal and shit, it’s awesome. Yeah, I do! He’s 23. Graduated my freshman year. He was a star football and hockey player at good ol’ Degrassi, back before sports started mattering here. He actually went minors for a minute and then he decided it wasn’t for him. Yeah, thank god for that, right? Milligainz is a dickweed. I sing and write songs. Music production is my thing man.

Sounds like it! My parents are pretty chill when it comes to alcohol, although they have no idea just how much of it my brother and I actually ingest…but they aren’t so fond of weed, or any other drugs. Dad doesn’t want us getting too messed up and ruining our “image”. Oh, nice! So he wasn’t a complete asshole about being in sports, I bet. That’s good. He totally is, and I can’t stand him. He likes to find something wrong with everyone. That’s actually really awesome! Do you have friends who do it too or are you a solo artist?

Haha, my parents would much rather I party in the house if I’m going to do it. Last time I went out... It didn’t end well. But yeah, that’s pretty reasonable of them. I mean my parents would find it completely unacceptable for me to do an acid trip while they’re around, but I wouldn’t do that anyway. Well, your dad is kind of notorious around here, right? That makes sense to me. Yeah, he was really great about being nice to everybody. He doesn’t have that athlete chip on his shoulder, for sure. I know, right? Like, just be nice for two minutes, please. How does that grade ten put up with him? Yeah, I love it. Well, there are a couple of musical people in the artists, Jake, Mo, Jonah... I like collaborating with all of them.

Whatever. I don’t have a boyfriend. Karma’s gonna come for you one of these days. And I’ll still hope that maybe you’ll learn to be a little nicer. 

You mean that loud dude you hang out with dumped you? Bummer. I don’t believe in karma, sorry. I am nice. Just not to you.

You’ve made your point. 

Well, it may be a Sunday, but fuck it, who wants to get crazy tonight?

Well, if you were interested, I’m sure you’ll find some way to get ahold of me.

Nothing too much. Ecstasy and weed, lots of alcohol. My dad smokes weed in the house and he’s a doctor so my parents are way chill about at least that, for the medical benefits anyway. Haha, good job. Yeah, brother’s are usually just a pain in the ass, but I love mine to death. He’s the best. But you’re right, Miles isn’t as bad. Don’t know the majority, don’t appreciate that they don’t think my talent is valid.

Ooh okay, so the basic stuff, you could say. Really? I think you’re the first person I’ve met whose parent smokes weed. At least they’re cool with it. You have a brother? How old? Yeah, he can be annoying too, but it could be worse. I’m glad Owen’s not my brother or something. What is your talent?

Girl you have no idea, it’s so rad. I love that they’re all liberal and shit, it’s awesome. Yeah, I do! He’s 23. Graduated my freshman year. He was a star football and hockey player at good ol’ Degrassi, back before sports started mattering here. He actually went minors for a minute and then he decided it wasn’t for him. Yeah, thank god for that, right? Milligainz is a dickweed. I sing and write songs. Music production is my thing man.

Why does it matter so much to you anyway? What’s wrong with it? It makes me think about chord progression, tempo, helps me write… I do my best deep-thinking when I’m high. I wouldn’t think that if you had a little more respect and actually encouraged instead of tearing us down. Honestly, Owen. All it takes is a little kindness to change somebody’s whole day. I have a shitty life. Shitty things have happened to me. Shitty things currently are happening to me. So if I want to smoke some weed and drink a little when I’m not busy, it’s really not for you to judge. At all. Pardon me if it does upset me, the things that you say sometimes. I guess I am.

It doesn’t matter to me or anyone else. Doesn’t mean I can’t point out how pathetic that sounds. There are about a million better ways to use your brain, but whatever. It’s not my job to encourage you, sweetheart. If you need someone to hold your hand, go find one of your friends or maybe even your boyfriend. Jesus, I didn’t ask for your life story. And I’m not changing my mind just because you’re having a shitty time, ‘cause so is the rest of the world. Yeah, well, I upset most people. Don’t take it so personally.

Whatever. I don’t have a boyfriend. Karma’s gonna come for you one of these days. And I’ll still hope that maybe you’ll learn to be a little nicer. 

Like the I need to drink way.

Oh, yeah…that’s what I figured. Are you sure it’s wise to get plastered on a school night?

It’s not the worst idea I’ve ever had. But probably not the best either.

Come on, you care a little bit. Otherwise why are you saying it? I feel like you think that having a drink and some bud on a Sunday when I have nothing else to do is gonna ruin my life, and if you think that, you’re mistaken. My life is already ruined. And thanks for pointing out how mediocre my life is, that really hurts. I already know that. You’re just saying a bunch of stuff that I already know, Milligan. I always kind of assume that athletes think that none of us are talented, but I refuse to be invalidated. You know, I’m not trying to kill your dreams, so stop making me feel shitty about mine. Yeah, we get it. I can see it at the 10 year reunion now, if you even show up. Hot shot with some recently graduated former sorority girl trophy wife and a brand new Benz. You’ll be the talk of Toronto. Whatever. 

Calling you out when you’re sounding crazy doesn’t equal caring. No, I think that drinking and having “some bud” on a Sunday night sounds like the life of a person with not much else to offer the world. You know, I might feel bad for you and your little friends if you guys didn’t have the same shit to say about us. You think we’re all meatheads, you’ve said it yourself. I’m not apologizing for thinking I’m better than anyone, ‘cause that’s what got me where I am. Who says I’m trying to make you feel shitty? I’m speaking my mind. Yep, you just described the dream. You done yet?

Why does it matter so much to you anyway? What’s wrong with it? It makes me think about chord progression, tempo, helps me write... I do my best deep-thinking when I’m high. I wouldn’t think that if you had a little more respect and actually encouraged instead of tearing us down. Honestly, Owen. All it takes is a little kindness to change somebody’s whole day. I have a shitty life. Shitty things have happened to me. Shitty things currently are happening to me. So if I want to smoke some weed and drink a little when I’m not busy, it’s really not for you to judge. At all. Pardon me if it does upset me, the things that you say sometimes. I guess I am.

Present me is floating on air. My sleep last night was good and so was the hibachi I had for lunch. I haven’t felt this great in weeks. So nobody can bring me down today. I just have a problem with the fact that you think you’re somehow so much better and more likely to succeed just because your thing is a sport. Every single member of the artists is talented enough to do anything they put their mind too. Not only that, but at least artists always have our talents. One bad movement and you’re done, bud. Career over.

Your sleep and your lunch have nothing to do with you trying to mess up the rest of your senior year, Lewis. But how many times do I have to say it? Not my problem, so I don’t care. Get wasted on a Sunday if that’s what your mediocre life demands. I don’t think that – I know it. I never said any of you weren’t talented. But how many other singers and songwriters are there in the world? A lot. So no, I don’t think you’re good enough to beat every single of them to the spotlight. Me on the other hand? I know I’m the best. There are precautions I take to prevent injury, and even if I do get hurt, a few solid years in the pros is all I need to shine. After that I’ll have my pick of coaching jobs.

Come on, you care a little bit. Otherwise why are you saying it? I feel like you think that having a drink and some bud on a Sunday when I have nothing else to do is gonna ruin my life, and if you think that, you’re mistaken. My life is already ruined. And thanks for pointing out how mediocre my life is, that really hurts. I already know that. You’re just saying a bunch of stuff that I already know, Milligan. I always kind of assume that athletes think that none of us are talented, but I refuse to be invalidated. You know, I’m not trying to kill your dreams, so stop making me feel shitty about mine. Yeah, we get it. I can see it at the 10 year reunion now, if you even show up. Hot shot with some recently graduated former sorority girl trophy wife and a brand new Benz. You’ll be the talk of Toronto. Whatever. 

I’m not a person who can relinquish my control very well. But when I turn up, I do it so I don’t regret what happened. One could assume, yes. Athletes aren’t really my type.

Well, what have you done? Drinking, smoking, weed, any hard drugs? What’s your limit? Yeah, the hard drugs seem to be the ones that usually come with the most regrets. Oh, me either. They’re annoying as hell. But he’s my brother, so I kind of have to put up with him. He’s not as bad as some of them.

Nothing too much. Ecstasy and weed, lots of alcohol. My dad smokes weed in the house and he’s a doctor so my parents are way chill about at least that, for the medical benefits anyway. Haha, good job. Yeah, brother’s are usually just a pain in the ass, but I love mine to death. He’s the best. But you’re right, Miles isn’t as bad. Don’t know the majority, don’t appreciate that they don’t think my talent is valid.

You know normal me would be offended by that. I’m not flunking, I’m choosing to party responsibly, thank you very much. And I’d rather write songs than take on all that fame, honestly. I wanna write for Beyonce, Meghan Trainor, Katy Perry. And I can do it, too.

So you’re not normal you? Go figure. There’s no such thing as partying responsible, but it’s your high school career, not mine. There are so many things I could say to that, but like I said, not my problem.

Present me is floating on air. My sleep last night was good and so was the hibachi I had for lunch. I haven’t felt this great in weeks. So nobody can bring me down today. I just have a problem with the fact that you think you’re somehow so much better and more likely to succeed just because your thing is a sport. Every single member of the artists is talented enough to do anything they put their mind too. Not only that, but at least artists always have our talents. One bad movement and you’re done, bud. Career over.

Because I feel very low stress and it’s better to party when you’re low stress so that you keep your shit together in the long term. But that’s good to know. Frankie, right? Hollingsturd’s little sister?

Okay, good point. If you like staying in control, that is. If by Hollingsturd you mean my brother Miles, then yes. I’m guessing you’re not a fan of him?

I’m not a person who can relinquish my control very well. But when I turn up, I do it so I don’t regret what happened. One could assume, yes. Athletes aren’t really my type.

Well, it may be a Sunday, but fuck it, who wants to get crazy tonight?

Seems like everyone’s down to turn up lately. Why the sudden urge? But I’m down.

Because I feel very low stress and it’s better to party when you’re low stress so that you keep your shit together in the long term. But that’s good to know. Frankie, right? Hollingsturd’s little sister?

Real shit, that’s what I’m on. It’s too early in the semester for me to be so serious. 

And what’s that code for? Finally realize you’ve been wasting your time trying to be the next Top 40 singer? Not too early for you to flunk out and repeat senior year.

You know normal me would be offended by that. I’m not flunking, I’m choosing to party responsibly, thank you very much. And I’d rather write songs than take on all that fame, honestly. I wanna write for Beyonce, Meghan Trainor, Katy Perry. And I can do it, too.

Well, it may be a Sunday, but fuck it, who wants to get crazy tonight?

What kind of shit are you on? I thought you Artists at least had some self control.

Real shit, that’s what I’m on. It’s too early in the semester for me to be so serious.