holding on to you

I think jax is very interesting as a character and psychologically but she is very clearly NOT a good person + quite frankly i don't think she's intended to be read that way either, and people who don't see that are misunderstanding her arc as a whole

she is going through a lot, dealing with her internalized misogyny, trans/homophobia, etc. and her traumatic past and whatnot, but this is very obviously not an excuse for Anything she does like ever?? and i don't get why anyone thinks it does.

my main criticisms for tadc as a whole is that i wish literally any of the characters other than jax were actually explored in depth + i wish they were all more complex, ESPECIALLY the women + zooble. i understand how this would have been difficult to achieve given the 9-episode format, and it being an indie show and all, but it's still perfectly valid to wish we just got more detail on the rest of them aside from jax, even if it was just from gooseworx directly.

jax doesn't really have a character arc, she just is awful the whole time, we get reasoning for this and in-depth exploration on why she was doing the things she did, and then she abstracts and does not return by the end. There's no recovery or character development. I have very nuanced opinions on her abstraction because while i do think it made it possible for pomni to figure out, i think it was handled poorly especially since it could have been used as a device to show that you don't need to forgive or forget abuse you faced. i get the feeling it was Trying to do that, but i couldn't really figure out if it Accomplished that.

I think going against the stereotype of abuser-gets-redemption-arc was a good choice narratively, especially considering everything she had done, but i just wish it was handled and shown better. I also wish especially gangle and zooble weren't implied to feel so inclined to help her, since she was so awful to them both, and they had NO obligation or need to help jax at all. ik friendship is power bla bla bla but i wish they'd shown a little more restraint, because it makes the development on how those two saw and interacted with jax fall flat and feel worthless in the end. ragatha on the other hand i think it makes a bit more sense for her to try to help jax even a little because that's just what she's like. she wants to help people, even if they've hurt her or don't accept it.

i am glad they didn't try to give jax a redemption arc in the circus because it would have been incredibly rushed + probably not done well. while i do think abusers should have chances to get better from their history in real life, i actually don't think this would have worked in tadc given jax's character + her relationships with the other characters + the writing of the story. she is not a good person, and i am glad they went through with that. i am also glad they showed gangle's reaction to and feelings about everyone helping jax after she abstracted (? if i remember correctly. my memory is notoriously terrible) because she doesn't have to and quite frankly shouldn't forgive jax or even try to help her at all, considering that gangle was the primary target for a lot of jax's abuse and harassment.

i don't know. as someone who's been watching tadc since the pilot was released, and has enjoyed jax since day 1, i thought the ending was pretty good or at the very least okay for what the show had going on. i will probably need to sit with it for a few days to better get a grasp on what message it was exactly trying to communicate, but i don't think the ending was THAT bad and could have been significantly worse.