thighs on the prize

the sexiest thing a woman can be is a cringe fujoshi with a very serious day job

Today I saw a leaf that looked like a frog and I was like haha nice and then it hopped because it WAS a frog and I started crying bc life is really full of everyday miracles including but not limited to experiencing frogs

you got camouflaged dude. If you were frog prey...... hoooo boy

When you are posting on tumblr, do not add your commentary to the text of the post, in case others disagree with you and the original poster may come and say to you, "Make your own post," and then you will be in disgrace. But when you post, add your commentary to the tags, so that when the original poster sees them, they may say to you, ‘Friend, do not hide this in the tags'; then you will be honored in the presence of all who blog with you.

sorry we've got orders to protect the royal bloodline and can't risk any illegitimate children coming to claim the throne so you gotta wear this chastity cage until you get married. it's fine tho we gave the key to your loyal knight in case there's any emergencies they're totally trustworthy

your promised consort is currently in a faraway kingdom so you and your knight have to go on this long journey to get there, just the two of you. just be sure to do whatever he says he's trained for all this has your life in his hands. if there's any issues he'll know how to handle it and everything. remember you're not permitted to be around any woman who might throw themselves at you since you're a pretty boy prince, only the knight. you'll be sharing rooms at taverns and a tent if you have to camp out. it's fine tho.

Whats the deal with the shambling corpse thats been following us for weeks

i support gore and torture but i draw the line at misogyny