Bloggin' Hoe

„It’s pile,” he said, running his hand back and forth over it, changing the texture. „Is it folded over itself?”

„It is,” I replied to both.

While having sex with my SD I looked upside down at the rain falling from a set in grey sky, and I thought that tonight I would unfold the blanket so I could sleep totally naked for the first time since May, not just without socks like last night, and about a boy I am meeting on Sunday who is 26 and patient and gorgeous, who has eyes that are simultaneously doe and shrewd, who is going to send me a photo of the 15 books he brought with him to Australia from Italy now he’s back in from work, and how nice it is that he thought his books important enough to move across the world with.

I thought about my 4:50am alarm tomorrow, and dinner tonight — risotto with prawns — and about what tennis replay I might watch while I eat, and how many pages of my book I might read before I go to sleep. Flavio Cobolli got knocked out of Umag in the second round and despite the fact that I’m enjoying that tournament more as a whole, on principle I will probably watch a match from Gstaad, and I’m still so exhausted from this week that I will probably manage 20 pages at most. I thought about the fact that it is 46° in Tashkent today and 13° in Sydney and that this time last year in Tbilisi it was 35° and I took a wrong turn on Arnold Chikobava street and walked in circles and sweated behind my knees.

I do not, but I still speak/text with my Polish friends and do Duolingo (mostly coz mum and I do the weekly friend quests and have a streak together, haha).

And the energy you give off is just so mesmerising and inviting. And being in the same city. There’s a part of me which hopes I get to bumping into you organically.

Thank you! On all counts. This is very kind and I do aspire to be a generally ~good energy~ person to be around…you can ask my two friends for confirmation though they may be biased, haha.

Hahah if it makes you feel any better even I did not realise one could be out until such a time in Sydney on a Tuesday night. I was in Newtown drinking too too much wine and smoking cigs and talking for 10 hours straight on a first date with a lovely Italian man.

„I’m standing in my kitchen in my slippers — I’ve taken the weekend off,” I told him while slicing strawberries to put on top of my oats.

„Damn, that’s crazy,” he replied.

I did my characteristic head back Lizz laugh, partly because it was the most basic boy on a dating app response, and partly because I realised that it probably was inconceivable to him that I have a domestic life where I’m not wearing makeup or a dress and heels or doing the last quarter of a bag with him at 7am.

Because of the way the month is structured I will be working more shifts than usual, even having this weekend off for period reasons. For the same reason I will also see my SD one additional Friday and so my baseline income from him will be higher and the majority of it will be going straight into savings. The trend at the broth has been consistently up, so financially I anticipate a better-than-average figure. Thursdays last month had been hit or miss — more miss than hit — and so I resolved that anything I make on those days will go into a fun and frivolity account. Whaddya know, I summoned my first good Thursday in some time a couple of days ago and so I am on track for my two dream purchases and/or another adventure next year.

Next Sunday I have an ultra special guest visiting for four nights — my beloved mummy yay! I haven’t seen her since April and even then it was in more of a group setting, so the one-on-one time is going to be so good. We have plans galore and gifts to swap and champagne to drink and I can’t wait. She has deliberately timed her visit to fit in with my work schedule, which is so kind…we love a supportive mother in sex work.

My first Friday of the month with my SD yesterday was so lovely. Not that it’s ever not, but this year we have become so much closer emotionally and each week seems to get better, within the month especially. No seven year itch for us! The past few weeks running he has said „I love you” while bidding me adieu and I say it back and mean it.

Idk it just feels like there’s an undercurrent of positivity and hopefulness!! I cannot explain. I feel like I am in touch with my creativity and sensuality and appreciation for life. I am looking for the good and seeing it, however small.

I was going to go crazy and set my alarm for 7 tomorrow instead of 6 (or 4.45 on weekends), but then I realised it would be way nicer to instead push everything forward by 30 mins, so I’m going to start my 🤸🏻‍♀️totally free day🤸🏻‍♀️ at 5.30, gulp down coffee and breakfast, layer up and take a brisk walk to a place by the water where I can watch the sunrise up close. Of course I see it up close when I’m taking a brisk walk to work, but it’s different knowing I can stop and linger and behold without worrying about getting to my destination (in this case a windowless building where I enter and reality then becomes suspended for 8.5 hours) (true to my nature I’m always half an hour early).