tight

you can trust me im literally a fake doctor

let’s post like it’s 2020

when youre inadvertently 1% too nice to a straight guy you can usually pinpoint the exact moment where he decides you must be acting that way because you want to fuck down on him crazy style and it is at this point that one would be well advised to have a cyanide capsule under a false tooth or an equivalent fast acting response

girls this weekend i'm eating breaddd - fucking myself with a rolled up pizza rn

This just inspired me, I’m gonna take a shower and then eat some insane garlic bread I picked up earlier and have more wine.

Sage Green whispers to me like the Green Goblin mask.

Out of all the stereotypical millennial colors that’s the only one I gravitate towards.

I also love a pink but not that nasty muted and muddied millennial pink, that shit is toooo close to salmon most of the time and I HATE salmon, one of the ugliest colors out there.

Sage Green whispers to me like the Green Goblin mask.

Out of all the stereotypical millennial colors that’s the only one I gravitate towards.

I’m so happy right now that I could scream.

Pretty sure I’m ovulating because I also had the thought that my extreme happiness rn also feels like mania because if I was out with my friends right now I would 100% be advocating for them to get a bag 😭

Oh, it was so funny when my friend met up with me at the mall yesterday because when I saw her I realized we were wearing the same exact outfit.

Dolphin shorts, baggy black shirts, hair in a claw clip.