the greek goddess herself

I am concerned about this culture of combing through years of people’s social media accounts, looking for “problematic” shit they’ve done. I am concerned with the whole culture of using “call outs” as a tool to harass and ostracize users large and small. I am concerned about the malice we spread behind people’s backs, in screenshots and posts they aren’t able to see. I am concerned with this culture of demanding apologies for things said years ago, things already outgrown and regretted, and of ignoring those apologies even while pilling on more censure. I’m concerned about this whole culture of accusation and misinformation, where the most outrageous claims and holier-than-thou performances are rewarded with notes and views, even as facts are ignored and context removed. I am concerned about the lack of accountability, the way the accused is given no opportunity to defend themselves from the onslaught, the way their responses and explanations go ignored, the way any charge can be made at any time on any evidence, with no ability to appeal or exonerate. I’m concerned about the way this culture targets minority users and turns their own communities against them. I’m concerned about the actually harmful and predatory behavior that gets lost in the bog, and how we have lost the ability to distinguish between shades of gray with any level of sanity. And I am concerned by the sheer number of people who fail to realize they are perpetuating bullying and harassment.

I am enormously concerned with the way people who are “called out” are never forgiven, never allowed to make amends, never allowed to grow, how their efforts to learn and do better are ignored even while strangers callously repeat and reblog and retweet the same criticisms ad nauseam.

And I see this everywhere, happening to anyone. And yes, this applies to larger accounts and youtubers and “influencers,” and a bunch of content creators who may or may not be making a decent living off of their work, but who are certainly not “rich and powerful celebrities.” (Because apparently we spend so much time in online microcosms that ya’ll can’t tell the difference???) Christ, my blog isn’t nearly as large as some people seem to think, it’s obscure by most measures, and still I’ve been the target of mass harassment for years. I’ve seen bad and watched others go through worse, seen users with far larger and far smaller followings driven off of this and other platforms—driven off with a violence and bloodthirst that had nothing to do with making a community safer and everything to do with a toxic culture gone wrong. Fucking fix this already.

This post-trauma effect isn’t irrational or exaggerating, if you feel this it’s because this is how horrible the trauma really was, but your were not able to feel it in the moment for several reasons; one of them is that it was unsafe to feel those things in front of abusers, they have already taught you that you will be punished for displaying trauma symptoms in front of them. To be additionally hurt in the middle of such pain would be unsurvivable. The other is that it would have killed you to feel all that as a kid. Keeping all that repressed to feel later is your body’s strategy of survival, you can only feel it now because you’re still alive in order to do it.

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.

all im sayings is that trigger warning are EXTREMELY helpful, and youre bashing them because they offend you??

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us) not have to go through terrible mental health things. why are you so against that??

having trigger warnings has saved me from episodes countless times

what’s funny to me is you say im laying the burden of my mental health on your shoulders, and you say youre entitled to shred my mental health by not taking an extra step and helping to protect people

its fucking pathetic, and its sad.

No. Warnings don’t offend me. I’m expressing my distaste for the fact that people demand authors put tags like “sad ending” on their fic or else they’re evil, morally deficient people. As it clearly says in my OP. This kind of demand combined with moral judgment offends me.

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us)

I know. I’m one of us :) 

you say youre entitled to shred my mental health

No. I’m saying the burden of deciding whether or not to read something, and thereby their mental health, lies on the shoulders of the readers. I can’t do anything to your mental health with my fic - except if I were to mistag. Mistagging is a dick move and I don’t condone that, plus it can be reported. But using the default tag of the site is not mistagging.

how am i supposed to know if the contents of your fics are sensitive or not if there are no trigger warnings?

If you read on Ao3, which is what my op was about, then authors are required to put up one of the following five:

Clearly, all of those are trigger warnings. Yes, even “choose not to use Archive warnings”, since it tells you that the author opted out of the whole warning business, meaning you need to avoid their fic if you’re not cool with surprise!sensitive content that might be in there. And this is entirely YOUR CHOICE and YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

My target audience is people who are fine with being surprised, which is why I use “choose not to warn”. Everyone who informed themselves properly about Ao3 knows that it means “beware, here be dragons”.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?? i just genuinely dont understand if youre in the mental state where they are extremely helpful

i agree it shouldnt be enforced, but that doesnt mean that it shouldnt happen. im not demanding anything, but trust me, people who arent triggered arent going to be offended by trigger warnings.

why not help the people who need the warnings instead of being offended that some people are demanding it

Then you need to inform yourself about the website you’re reading on and their warning system. This is something that is entirely on the readers, and also easy to do.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?

The concept of putting in trigger warnings in general doesn’t bother me. I used to warn much more. But what bothers me is bowing to demands that tell me: “If you do this thing that you are actually allowed to do and which is perfectly fine, then you are an arsehole and a morally bad person.” I’m 100% bristling at that demand, for my own personal reasons that are not for internet users to know. I can’t do it. So I chose to only use CNTUAW. Which is absolutely valid.

why not help the people who need the warnings

i understand not liking the demand, and i dont do well with demands either, which is why im not demanding anything

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

so go ahead, participate in the fandom the way you want, but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands (like i said, i get it, but there is a time where they have a point) might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

Jesus Christ. Generic you - please read this link.

i just want to protect the people who come across it not expecting sensitive content

If it’s warned for - and “choose not to warn” IS a warning that is EXPLAINED on Ao3 - then they need to expect it. What is so hard about this?

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

We disagree. if it’s their fault, it’s their fault, and that’s that. I’ve done my part - if they can’t do theirs, I’m sorry, but it’s not my problem. Putting other people’s burden’s on one’s shoulders when there is absolutely no sense to it is not healthy.

but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands […] might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

I’m quivering in my boots. If they read my fics despite seeing the “choose not to warn” tag, that is, again entirely their own problem. They didn’t get triggered because of my warning policies, they got triggered because of their own choices. If they want to come and tell me how mad they are. I’ll tell them the following:

just a warning

Don’t worry. I’m a big enby, I’ve been in fandom for 17 years. I can cope.

αγάπη

have fun being a “big enby” when youre really just a jackass willing to trample all over people’s trauma because youre butthurt about being told what to do

im not telling you to do shit, im just trying to defend people like me.

you say youre like me, that youre like us, but if you were as severe, you would get what im saying

im not trying to trample over what you say youre entitled to do, im just explaining that you dont have to bash people who do put trigger warnings, because thats fucked up

no one is saying to manage our emotions or take over the burden of our mental health. we’re asking to be considerate. same as wearing a mask during covid. same as holding the door open for people. its really not a hard concept to grasp.

you do whatever you think is right for you, but dont invalidate people when they come to you about it, or youre just being a douchebag. i dont believe that everyones feelings should be OVERLY protected, but episodes have made me suicidal before

What are you even referring to? Also, so far you’ve explained nothing but how I’m somehow responsible for readers making decisions that are bad to them. And it wasn’t a very good explanation, let me tell you that. By the way, that quote up there, by you? That’s pretty condescending. Huh.

have fun being a “big enby” when youre really just a jackass willing to trample all over people’s trauma because youre butthurt about being told what to do

Once again, it all boils down to: “People are entitled to reading your fics, and if you don’t make them accessible to them the way they want it, then you’re an arsehole. Fuck you and your fandom needs, only I am right, my way is the only way, and you need to bow down to people screaming about their trauma the loudest.”

you say youre like me, that youre like us, but if you were as severe, you would get what im saying

Know what? FUCK YOU, YOUR ENTITLEMENT, AND THE TRAUMA OLYMPICS HORSE YOU RODE IN ON. I’m not obligated to reveal anything to you, and you have no way of judging my life or mental health based on some opinion about fanfic. You’re completely off your rocker if you think this.

im not trying to trample over what you say youre entitled to do

*LOL*

you dont have to bash people who do put trigger warnings

I sincerely have to ask: Can you read? Are you stupid? Because I never said I had anything against people who do use trigger warnings on their fics. On the contrary. I said, twice, that I have nothing against trigger warnings - everyone can use them to their heart’s content. BUT I, PERSONALLY, AM ONLY USING ONE GENERIC ONE. There is a fucking difference. This is the third time I’m explaining this. 

we’re asking to be considerate

I am. I’m putting a trigger warning on my fics. It’s “Choose not to use Archive Warnings” and it warns people like you to STAY THE FUCK AWAY from my fics. That’s not a hard concept to grasp.

but dont invalidate people when they come to you about it, or youre just being a douchebag.

You were the douchebag who came to me, told me “fuck you” and tried to invalidate me - my way to participate in fandom as well as what I said about my mental health. So kindly look in a fucking mirror and STFU.

but episodes have made me suicidal before

I’m sorry to hear that. I hope that won’t happen in the future, and that you neither stumble upon mistagged fics nor go reading fics that are clearly tagged as not suitable for you.

so yeah, “quiver in your boots,” because if you cant grasp a concept this fucking simple, then youre going to have a rough life

@greekgoddess458 your argument seems to be that you or someone like you might see that trigger warning and ignore it or disbelieve it or misunderstand it or not notice it, and therefore be harmed, and… that sucks, it does. But it’s not the fault of the person who correctly and appropriately tagged their fic. They told you what risks you might be taking; they can’t read it or understand it FOR you.

There’s a lot of emotionally-charged language and distraction (including accusing OP of saying things that were never said or even implied) going on in this thread, but none of it changes the fact that “Chose Not To Warn” is a valid warning in and of itself. If what it implies makes you uncomfortable, then you should probably, for your own peace of mind, treat it as the warning it is and not read fics tagged that way.

i was being a douchebag, and i apologize for that. it was at night, i was exhausted, and i had been feeling anxious all day. i know my mental health isnt an excuse for my actions, but i am sorry.

i never wanted to invalidate anyone, and i realize now that i misunderstood. the explanation above really helped me.

i just hope we can come together as a community and support mental health in a way that doesnt offend anyone, but sadly, people are jerks (including me)

i really am sorry, i misunderstood. i got angry and focused on the bad bits instead of truly hearing your argument out @lordhellebore

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.

all im sayings is that trigger warning are EXTREMELY helpful, and youre bashing them because they offend you??

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us) not have to go through terrible mental health things. why are you so against that??

having trigger warnings has saved me from episodes countless times

what’s funny to me is you say im laying the burden of my mental health on your shoulders, and you say youre entitled to shred my mental health by not taking an extra step and helping to protect people

its fucking pathetic, and its sad.

No. Warnings don’t offend me. I’m expressing my distaste for the fact that people demand authors put tags like “sad ending” on their fic or else they’re evil, morally deficient people. As it clearly says in my OP. This kind of demand combined with moral judgment offends me.

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us)

I know. I’m one of us :) 

you say youre entitled to shred my mental health

No. I’m saying the burden of deciding whether or not to read something, and thereby their mental health, lies on the shoulders of the readers. I can’t do anything to your mental health with my fic - except if I were to mistag. Mistagging is a dick move and I don’t condone that, plus it can be reported. But using the default tag of the site is not mistagging.

how am i supposed to know if the contents of your fics are sensitive or not if there are no trigger warnings?

If you read on Ao3, which is what my op was about, then authors are required to put up one of the following five:

Clearly, all of those are trigger warnings. Yes, even “choose not to use Archive warnings”, since it tells you that the author opted out of the whole warning business, meaning you need to avoid their fic if you’re not cool with surprise!sensitive content that might be in there. And this is entirely YOUR CHOICE and YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

My target audience is people who are fine with being surprised, which is why I use “choose not to warn”. Everyone who informed themselves properly about Ao3 knows that it means “beware, here be dragons”.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?? i just genuinely dont understand if youre in the mental state where they are extremely helpful

i agree it shouldnt be enforced, but that doesnt mean that it shouldnt happen. im not demanding anything, but trust me, people who arent triggered arent going to be offended by trigger warnings.

why not help the people who need the warnings instead of being offended that some people are demanding it

Then you need to inform yourself about the website you’re reading on and their warning system. This is something that is entirely on the readers, and also easy to do.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?

The concept of putting in trigger warnings in general doesn’t bother me. I used to warn much more. But what bothers me is bowing to demands that tell me: “If you do this thing that you are actually allowed to do and which is perfectly fine, then you are an arsehole and a morally bad person.” I’m 100% bristling at that demand, for my own personal reasons that are not for internet users to know. I can’t do it. So I chose to only use CNTUAW. Which is absolutely valid.

why not help the people who need the warnings

i understand not liking the demand, and i dont do well with demands either, which is why im not demanding anything

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

so go ahead, participate in the fandom the way you want, but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands (like i said, i get it, but there is a time where they have a point) might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

Jesus Christ. Generic you - please read this link.

i just want to protect the people who come across it not expecting sensitive content

If it’s warned for - and “choose not to warn” IS a warning that is EXPLAINED on Ao3 - then they need to expect it. What is so hard about this?

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

We disagree. if it’s their fault, it’s their fault, and that’s that. I’ve done my part - if they can’t do theirs, I’m sorry, but it’s not my problem. Putting other people’s burden’s on one’s shoulders when there is absolutely no sense to it is not healthy.

but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands […] might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

I’m quivering in my boots. If they read my fics despite seeing the “choose not to warn” tag, that is, again entirely their own problem. They didn’t get triggered because of my warning policies, they got triggered because of their own choices. If they want to come and tell me how mad they are. I’ll tell them the following:

just a warning

Don’t worry. I’m a big enby, I’ve been in fandom for 17 years. I can cope.

αγάπη

have fun being a “big enby” when youre really just a jackass willing to trample all over people’s trauma because youre butthurt about being told what to do

im not telling you to do shit, im just trying to defend people like me.

you say youre like me, that youre like us, but if you were as severe, you would get what im saying

im not trying to trample over what you say youre entitled to do, im just explaining that you dont have to bash people who do put trigger warnings, because thats fucked up

no one is saying to manage our emotions or take over the burden of our mental health. we’re asking to be considerate. same as wearing a mask during covid. same as holding the door open for people. its really not a hard concept to grasp.

you do whatever you think is right for you, but dont invalidate people when they come to you about it, or youre just being a douchebag. i dont believe that everyones feelings should be OVERLY protected, but episodes have made me suicidal before

What are you even referring to? Also, so far you’ve explained nothing but how I’m somehow responsible for readers making decisions that are bad to them. And it wasn’t a very good explanation, let me tell you that. By the way, that quote up there, by you? That’s pretty condescending. Huh.

have fun being a “big enby” when youre really just a jackass willing to trample all over people’s trauma because youre butthurt about being told what to do

Once again, it all boils down to: “People are entitled to reading your fics, and if you don’t make them accessible to them the way they want it, then you’re an arsehole. Fuck you and your fandom needs, only I am right, my way is the only way, and you need to bow down to people screaming about their trauma the loudest.”

you say youre like me, that youre like us, but if you were as severe, you would get what im saying

Know what? FUCK YOU, YOUR ENTITLEMENT, AND THE TRAUMA OLYMPICS HORSE YOU RODE IN ON. I’m not obligated to reveal anything to you, and you have no way of judging my life or mental health based on some opinion about fanfic. You’re completely off your rocker if you think this.

im not trying to trample over what you say youre entitled to do

*LOL*

you dont have to bash people who do put trigger warnings

I sincerely have to ask: Can you read? Are you stupid? Because I never said I had anything against people who do use trigger warnings on their fics. On the contrary. I said, twice, that I have nothing against trigger warnings - everyone can use them to their heart’s content. BUT I, PERSONALLY, AM ONLY USING ONE GENERIC ONE. There is a fucking difference. This is the third time I’m explaining this. 

we’re asking to be considerate

I am. I’m putting a trigger warning on my fics. It’s “Choose not to use Archive Warnings” and it warns people like you to STAY THE FUCK AWAY from my fics. That’s not a hard concept to grasp.

but dont invalidate people when they come to you about it, or youre just being a douchebag.

You were the douchebag who came to me, told me “fuck you” and tried to invalidate me - my way to participate in fandom as well as what I said about my mental health. So kindly look in a fucking mirror and STFU.

but episodes have made me suicidal before

I’m sorry to hear that. I hope that won’t happen in the future, and that you neither stumble upon mistagged fics nor go reading fics that are clearly tagged as not suitable for you.

so yeah, “quiver in your boots,” because if you cant grasp a concept this fucking simple, then youre going to have a rough life

@greekgoddess458 your argument seems to be that you or someone like you might see that trigger warning and ignore it or disbelieve it or misunderstand it or not notice it, and therefore be harmed, and… that sucks, it does. But it’s not the fault of the person who correctly and appropriately tagged their fic. They told you what risks you might be taking; they can’t read it or understand it FOR you.

There’s a lot of emotionally-charged language and distraction (including accusing OP of saying things that were never said or even implied) going on in this thread, but none of it changes the fact that “Chose Not To Warn” is a valid warning in and of itself. If what it implies makes you uncomfortable, then you should probably, for your own peace of mind, treat it as the warning it is and not read fics tagged that way.

i was being a douchebag, and i apologize for that. it was at night, i was exhausted, and i had been feeling anxious all day. i know my mental health isnt an excuse for my actions, but i am sorry.

i never wanted to invalidate anyone, and i realize now that i misunderstood. the explanation above really helped me.

i just hope we can come together as a community and support mental health in a way that doesnt offend anyone, but sadly, people are jerks (including me)

i really am sorry, i misunderstood. i got angry and focused on the bad bits instead of truly hearing your argument out @lordhellebore

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.

all im sayings is that trigger warning are EXTREMELY helpful, and youre bashing them because they offend you??

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us) not have to go through terrible mental health things. why are you so against that??

having trigger warnings has saved me from episodes countless times

what’s funny to me is you say im laying the burden of my mental health on your shoulders, and you say youre entitled to shred my mental health by not taking an extra step and helping to protect people

its fucking pathetic, and its sad.

No. Warnings don’t offend me. I’m expressing my distaste for the fact that people demand authors put tags like “sad ending” on their fic or else they’re evil, morally deficient people. As it clearly says in my OP. This kind of demand combined with moral judgment offends me.

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us)

I know. I’m one of us :) 

you say youre entitled to shred my mental health

No. I’m saying the burden of deciding whether or not to read something, and thereby their mental health, lies on the shoulders of the readers. I can’t do anything to your mental health with my fic - except if I were to mistag. Mistagging is a dick move and I don’t condone that, plus it can be reported. But using the default tag of the site is not mistagging.

how am i supposed to know if the contents of your fics are sensitive or not if there are no trigger warnings?

If you read on Ao3, which is what my op was about, then authors are required to put up one of the following five:

Clearly, all of those are trigger warnings. Yes, even “choose not to use Archive warnings”, since it tells you that the author opted out of the whole warning business, meaning you need to avoid their fic if you’re not cool with surprise!sensitive content that might be in there. And this is entirely YOUR CHOICE and YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

My target audience is people who are fine with being surprised, which is why I use “choose not to warn”. Everyone who informed themselves properly about Ao3 knows that it means “beware, here be dragons”.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?? i just genuinely dont understand if youre in the mental state where they are extremely helpful

i agree it shouldnt be enforced, but that doesnt mean that it shouldnt happen. im not demanding anything, but trust me, people who arent triggered arent going to be offended by trigger warnings.

why not help the people who need the warnings instead of being offended that some people are demanding it

Then you need to inform yourself about the website you’re reading on and their warning system. This is something that is entirely on the readers, and also easy to do.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?

The concept of putting in trigger warnings in general doesn’t bother me. I used to warn much more. But what bothers me is bowing to demands that tell me: “If you do this thing that you are actually allowed to do and which is perfectly fine, then you are an arsehole and a morally bad person.” I’m 100% bristling at that demand, for my own personal reasons that are not for internet users to know. I can’t do it. So I chose to only use CNTUAW. Which is absolutely valid.

why not help the people who need the warnings

i understand not liking the demand, and i dont do well with demands either, which is why im not demanding anything

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

so go ahead, participate in the fandom the way you want, but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands (like i said, i get it, but there is a time where they have a point) might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

Jesus Christ. Generic you - please read this link.

i just want to protect the people who come across it not expecting sensitive content

If it’s warned for - and “choose not to warn” IS a warning that is EXPLAINED on Ao3 - then they need to expect it. What is so hard about this?

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

We disagree. if it’s their fault, it’s their fault, and that’s that. I’ve done my part - if they can’t do theirs, I’m sorry, but it’s not my problem. Putting other people’s burden’s on one’s shoulders when there is absolutely no sense to it is not healthy.

but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands […] might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

I’m quivering in my boots. If they read my fics despite seeing the “choose not to warn” tag, that is, again entirely their own problem. They didn’t get triggered because of my warning policies, they got triggered because of their own choices. If they want to come and tell me how mad they are. I’ll tell them the following:

just a warning

Don’t worry. I’m a big enby, I’ve been in fandom for 17 years. I can cope.

αγάπη

have fun being a “big enby” when youre really just a jackass willing to trample all over people’s trauma because youre butthurt about being told what to do

im not telling you to do shit, im just trying to defend people like me.

you say youre like me, that youre like us, but if you were as severe, you would get what im saying

im not trying to trample over what you say youre entitled to do, im just explaining that you dont have to bash people who do put trigger warnings, because thats fucked up

no one is saying to manage our emotions or take over the burden of our mental health. we’re asking to be considerate. same as wearing a mask during covid. same as holding the door open for people. its really not a hard concept to grasp.

you do whatever you think is right for you, but dont invalidate people when they come to you about it, or youre just being a douchebag. i dont believe that everyones feelings should be OVERLY protected, but episodes have made me suicidal before

What are you even referring to? Also, so far you’ve explained nothing but how I’m somehow responsible for readers making decisions that are bad to them. And it wasn’t a very good explanation, let me tell you that. By the way, that quote up there, by you? That’s pretty condescending. Huh.

have fun being a “big enby” when youre really just a jackass willing to trample all over people’s trauma because youre butthurt about being told what to do

Once again, it all boils down to: “People are entitled to reading your fics, and if you don’t make them accessible to them the way they want it, then you’re an arsehole. Fuck you and your fandom needs, only I am right, my way is the only way, and you need to bow down to people screaming about their trauma the loudest.”

you say youre like me, that youre like us, but if you were as severe, you would get what im saying

Know what? FUCK YOU, YOUR ENTITLEMENT, AND THE TRAUMA OLYMPICS HORSE YOU RODE IN ON. I’m not obligated to reveal anything to you, and you have no way of judging my life or mental health based on some opinion about fanfic. You’re completely off your rocker if you think this.

im not trying to trample over what you say youre entitled to do

*LOL*

you dont have to bash people who do put trigger warnings

I sincerely have to ask: Can you read? Are you stupid? Because I never said I had anything against people who do use trigger warnings on their fics. On the contrary. I said, twice, that I have nothing against trigger warnings - everyone can use them to their heart’s content. BUT I, PERSONALLY, AM ONLY USING ONE GENERIC ONE. There is a fucking difference. This is the third time I’m explaining this. 

we’re asking to be considerate

I am. I’m putting a trigger warning on my fics. It’s “Choose not to use Archive Warnings” and it warns people like you to STAY THE FUCK AWAY from my fics. That’s not a hard concept to grasp.

but dont invalidate people when they come to you about it, or youre just being a douchebag.

You were the douchebag who came to me, told me “fuck you” and tried to invalidate me - my way to participate in fandom as well as what I said about my mental health. So kindly look in a fucking mirror and STFU.

but episodes have made me suicidal before

I’m sorry to hear that. I hope that won’t happen in the future, and that you neither stumble upon mistagged fics nor go reading fics that are clearly tagged as not suitable for you.

so yeah, “quiver in your boots,” because if you cant grasp a concept this fucking simple, then youre going to have a rough life

@greekgoddess458 your argument seems to be that you or someone like you might see that trigger warning and ignore it or disbelieve it or misunderstand it or not notice it, and therefore be harmed, and… that sucks, it does. But it’s not the fault of the person who correctly and appropriately tagged their fic. They told you what risks you might be taking; they can’t read it or understand it FOR you.

There’s a lot of emotionally-charged language and distraction (including accusing OP of saying things that were never said or even implied) going on in this thread, but none of it changes the fact that “Chose Not To Warn” is a valid warning in and of itself. If what it implies makes you uncomfortable, then you should probably, for your own peace of mind, treat it as the warning it is and not read fics tagged that way.

i was being a douchebag, and i apologize for that. it was at night, i was exhausted, and i had been feeling anxious all day. i know my mental health isnt an excuse for my actions, but i am sorry.

i never wanted to invalidate anyone, and i realize now that i misunderstood. the explanation above really helped me.

i just hope we can come together as a community and support mental health in a way that doesnt offend anyone, but sadly, people are jerks (including me)

i really am sorry, i misunderstood. i got angry and focused on the bad bits instead of truly hearing your argument out @lordhellebore

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.

all im sayings is that trigger warning are EXTREMELY helpful, and youre bashing them because they offend you??

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us) not have to go through terrible mental health things. why are you so against that??

having trigger warnings has saved me from episodes countless times

what’s funny to me is you say im laying the burden of my mental health on your shoulders, and you say youre entitled to shred my mental health by not taking an extra step and helping to protect people

its fucking pathetic, and its sad.

No. Warnings don’t offend me. I’m expressing my distaste for the fact that people demand authors put tags like “sad ending” on their fic or else they’re evil, morally deficient people. As it clearly says in my OP. This kind of demand combined with moral judgment offends me.

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us)

I know. I’m one of us :) 

you say youre entitled to shred my mental health

No. I’m saying the burden of deciding whether or not to read something, and thereby their mental health, lies on the shoulders of the readers. I can’t do anything to your mental health with my fic - except if I were to mistag. Mistagging is a dick move and I don’t condone that, plus it can be reported. But using the default tag of the site is not mistagging.

how am i supposed to know if the contents of your fics are sensitive or not if there are no trigger warnings?

If you read on Ao3, which is what my op was about, then authors are required to put up one of the following five:

Clearly, all of those are trigger warnings. Yes, even “choose not to use Archive warnings”, since it tells you that the author opted out of the whole warning business, meaning you need to avoid their fic if you’re not cool with surprise!sensitive content that might be in there. And this is entirely YOUR CHOICE and YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

My target audience is people who are fine with being surprised, which is why I use “choose not to warn”. Everyone who informed themselves properly about Ao3 knows that it means “beware, here be dragons”.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?? i just genuinely dont understand if youre in the mental state where they are extremely helpful

i agree it shouldnt be enforced, but that doesnt mean that it shouldnt happen. im not demanding anything, but trust me, people who arent triggered arent going to be offended by trigger warnings.

why not help the people who need the warnings instead of being offended that some people are demanding it

Then you need to inform yourself about the website you’re reading on and their warning system. This is something that is entirely on the readers, and also easy to do.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?

The concept of putting in trigger warnings in general doesn’t bother me. I used to warn much more. But what bothers me is bowing to demands that tell me: “If you do this thing that you are actually allowed to do and which is perfectly fine, then you are an arsehole and a morally bad person.” I’m 100% bristling at that demand, for my own personal reasons that are not for internet users to know. I can’t do it. So I chose to only use CNTUAW. Which is absolutely valid.

why not help the people who need the warnings

i understand not liking the demand, and i dont do well with demands either, which is why im not demanding anything

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

so go ahead, participate in the fandom the way you want, but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands (like i said, i get it, but there is a time where they have a point) might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

Jesus Christ. Generic you - please read this link.

i just want to protect the people who come across it not expecting sensitive content

If it’s warned for - and “choose not to warn” IS a warning that is EXPLAINED on Ao3 - then they need to expect it. What is so hard about this?

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

We disagree. if it’s their fault, it’s their fault, and that’s that. I’ve done my part - if they can’t do theirs, I’m sorry, but it’s not my problem. Putting other people’s burden’s on one’s shoulders when there is absolutely no sense to it is not healthy.

but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people’s demands […] might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

I’m quivering in my boots. If they read my fics despite seeing the “choose not to warn” tag, that is, again entirely their own problem. They didn’t get triggered because of my warning policies, they got triggered because of their own choices. If they want to come and tell me how mad they are. I’ll tell them the following:

just a warning

Don’t worry. I’m a big enby, I’ve been in fandom for 17 years. I can cope.

αγάπη

have fun being a "big enby" when youre really just a jackass willing to trample all over people's trauma because youre butthurt about being told what to do

im not telling you to do shit, im just trying to defend people like me.

you say youre like me, that youre like us, but if you were as severe, you would get what im saying

im not trying to trample over what you say youre entitled to do, im just explaining that you dont have to bash people who do put trigger warnings, because thats fucked up

no one is saying to manage our emotions or take over the burden of our mental health. we're asking to be considerate. same as wearing a mask during covid. same as holding the door open for people. its really not a hard concept to grasp.

you do whatever you think is right for you, but dont invalidate people when they come to you about it, or youre just being a douchebag. i dont believe that everyones feelings should be OVERLY protected, but episodes have made me suicidal before

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.

all im sayings is that trigger warning are EXTREMELY helpful, and youre bashing them because they offend you??

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us) not have to go through terrible mental health things. why are you so against that??

having trigger warnings has saved me from episodes countless times

what’s funny to me is you say im laying the burden of my mental health on your shoulders, and you say youre entitled to shred my mental health by not taking an extra step and helping to protect people

its fucking pathetic, and its sad.

No. Warnings don’t offend me. I’m expressing my distaste for the fact that people demand authors put tags like “sad ending” on their fic or else they’re evil, morally deficient people. As it clearly says in my OP. This kind of demand combined with moral judgment offends me.

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us)

I know. I’m one of us :) 

you say youre entitled to shred my mental health

No. I’m saying the burden of deciding whether or not to read something, and thereby their mental health, lies on the shoulders of the readers. I can’t do anything to your mental health with my fic - except if I were to mistag. Mistagging is a dick move and I don’t condone that, plus it can be reported. But using the default tag of the site is not mistagging.

how am i supposed to know if the contents of your fics are sensitive or not if there are no trigger warnings?

If you read on Ao3, which is what my op was about, then authors are required to put up one of the following five:

Clearly, all of those are trigger warnings. Yes, even “choose not to use Archive warnings”, since it tells you that the author opted out of the whole warning business, meaning you need to avoid their fic if you’re not cool with surprise!sensitive content that might be in there. And this is entirely YOUR CHOICE and YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

My target audience is people who are fine with being surprised, which is why I use “choose not to warn”. Everyone who informed themselves properly about Ao3 knows that it means “beware, here be dragons”.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?? i just genuinely dont understand if youre in the mental state where they are extremely helpful

i agree it shouldnt be enforced, but that doesnt mean that it shouldnt happen. im not demanding anything, but trust me, people who arent triggered arent going to be offended by trigger warnings.

why not help the people who need the warnings instead of being offended that some people are demanding it

Then you need to inform yourself about the website you’re reading on and their warning system. This is something that is entirely on the readers, and also easy to do.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?

The concept of putting in trigger warnings in general doesn’t bother me. I used to warn much more. But what bothers me is bowing to demands that tell me: “If you do this thing that you are actually allowed to do and which is perfectly fine, then you are an arsehole and a morally bad person.” I’m 100% bristling at that demand, for my own personal reasons that are not for internet users to know. I can’t do it. So I chose to only use CNTUAW. Which is absolutely valid.

why not help the people who need the warnings

i understand not liking the demand, and i dont do well with demands either, which is why im not demanding anything

just know that some readers dont know what theyre getting into, and even if its their fault, they shouldnt have to suffer through shit because of that

so go ahead, participate in the fandom the way you want, but know that the people who get triggered because you didnt put warnings because you got offended by some people's demands (like i said, i get it, but there is a time where they have a point) might get mad at you for that, so be prepared

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.

all im sayings is that trigger warning are EXTREMELY helpful, and youre bashing them because they offend you??

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us) not have to go through terrible mental health things. why are you so against that??

having trigger warnings has saved me from episodes countless times

what’s funny to me is you say im laying the burden of my mental health on your shoulders, and you say youre entitled to shred my mental health by not taking an extra step and helping to protect people

its fucking pathetic, and its sad.

No. Warnings don’t offend me. I’m expressing my distaste for the fact that people demand authors put tags like “sad ending” on their fic or else they’re evil, morally deficient people. As it clearly says in my OP. This kind of demand combined with moral judgment offends me.

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us)

I know. I’m one of us :) 

you say youre entitled to shred my mental health

No. I’m saying the burden of deciding whether or not to read something, and thereby their mental health, lies on the shoulders of the readers. I can’t do anything to your mental health with my fic - except if I were to mistag. Mistagging is a dick move and I don’t condone that, plus it can be reported. But using the default tag of the site is not mistagging.

how am i supposed to know if the contents of your fics are sensitive or not if there are no trigger warnings?

If you read on Ao3, which is what my op was about, then authors are required to put up one of the following five:

Clearly, all of those are trigger warnings. Yes, even “choose not to use Archive warnings”, since it tells you that the author opted out of the whole warning business, meaning you need to avoid their fic if you’re not cool with surprise!sensitive content that might be in there. And this is entirely YOUR CHOICE and YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

My target audience is people who are fine with being surprised, which is why I use “choose not to warn”. Everyone who informed themselves properly about Ao3 knows that it means “beware, here be dragons”.

and if you are one of us, why does it bother you to put those trigger warnings?? i just genuinely dont understand if youre in the mental state where they are extremely helpful

i agree it shouldnt be enforced, but that doesnt mean that it shouldnt happen. im not demanding anything, but trust me, people who arent triggered arent going to be offended by trigger warnings.

why not help the people who need the warnings instead of being offended that some people are demanding it

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.

all im sayings is that trigger warning are EXTREMELY helpful, and youre bashing them because they offend you??

i dont care who youre target audience is, but if there is sensitive content in your fics then fucking put a trigger warning on there

having trigger warning helps people like me (and trust me, there are a lot of us) not have to go through terrible mental health things. why are you so against that??

having trigger warnings has saved me from episodes countless times

what's funny to me is you say im laying the burden of my mental health on your shoulders, and you say youre entitled to shred my mental health by not taking an extra step and helping to protect people

its fucking pathetic, and its sad.

There is a level of “manage all my emotions for me!” that I find deeply disturbing, and this belongs into that category.