you could be my alibi

!

LORD OF THE RINGS DAY

Mr. Bennet: Sure, I haven't taken care of my daughters' financial security, but have I at least taken care of their education? No. But have I taken care of their emotional needs? Also no. But have I been a good protector and supervisor? I'm afraid not. However, have I been a good example for my children of being a kind and respectful spouse, parent, and all around human being? No again. But through it all, have I nailed being funny? Yes. And isn't that the most important role of a father after all?

hobbits were the peak of civilization in tolkien verse. jobs were Gardening, Stall At The Farmer’s Market, or Mailman. Shoes OFF, capris ON, 6 meals a day, high and fat as all shit. Names like Daddy Twofoot….why the fuck are we horny for elves

good god when the onions and garlic hit the olive oil..........

Panties hit the FLOOR

you know it sister

Work chapstick. Car chapstick. Nightstand chapstick. Bathroom chapstick. Jacket pocket chapstick.Bag chapstick. You have to be prepared.

Laundry chapstick :(

Threshold Day is next week. It is coming. Oh lawd, it's coming.