Can I get uuhhhh....

#lost in a fugue of penis delerium

reblog to spread your dick mania to everywhere you go

wire son and cloth son

i was on the way to the movies & i saw an old guy with a piece of wood over his shoulders. it was huge -- a pole several feet long with a kind of wide fan at the end of it. and i said "what the hell is that?" and he looked at me and had this kind of ear to ear grin, and he said "what do you mean 'what the hell is that'?" and he sat back on his heels, still with that big smile like the sun spilling from the underside of a cloud and waited for me to answer and i said "i mean i don't know why you're walking around with that thing, whatever it is." and he laughed and put down his pole and kinda clapped me on the shoulder. "can i get you a drink?" he said. and i said "no, the show's in ten minutes," and he said "oh? what are you seeing?" and i said "christopher nolan's odyssey, i'm pretty excited," and he sighed and picked up his oar and kept walking.

I don’t get the joke :( someone help me

in some versions of the Odysseus legend, Odysseus leaves Ithaca and is supposed to wander the world carrying a ship's oar until he finds a place where no one knows what it is. here, he encounters someone who doesn't recognize it, but since the narrator is going to see a movie version of the Odyssey, that anonymity can't last & he has to keep wandering.

you people aren't CASTING

once i get taken out back and shot i'll be fine

where's that picture that ruined my life

"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

‘capitalism works’ factoid actually untrue. the 62 people who own half the world’s wealth are outliers and should be eaten.

62 8

Absolutely nuts how they made up a number for this satire post and the correction is that reality is *more absurd* than the number they chose

no i’m afraid it’s even worse than that. 62 was correct in 2016 when the original post was made.