Fyr

im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

the thing about phone in bed is that it's so awesome. almost makes you feel like betraying & destroying yourself for nothing isn't all so bad

Artfully layering an axe bodyspray deodorant and two different perfume oils to create a tasteful mixture of amber, oud, mint, lavender, moss and petrichor, producing a scent that smells exactly like damp, stale, rotting laundry.

Reminds me of that tumblr user that made powdered milk with sparkling water and created instant spoiled milk

That was also me.

Watching Zoolander and just got trump jumpscared holy cow

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things

My Shakespeare students (they are 12) wanted to summarize the lessons they learned this semester. If. Um. Anybody would like to see.

"Rationalism" is up there with "Objectivism" in terms of "definitionally funny things to call your own belief system".

"Yeah man I've been doing some thinking and philosophy and I've come up with a framework called Being Right"

Check out my new philosophy called Correctism. It includes all of the correct and true ideas and rejects the wrong ones.

some of the music i listen to is straight up bad

my devoted but dangerously unstable knight will be hearing about this