this is all for something… right?
we're not kids anymore.
Misplaced Lens Cap

★
Noah Kahan
ojovivo
todays bird
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Jules of Nature
untitled

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@funkkpunk
this is all for something… right?

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Andi Veskioja
abandoned grain elevator, highway 195 through the palouse in wa. // dec. 2024

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abandoned grain elevator, highway 195 through the palouse in wa. // dec. 2024
Minatosakai Community Center, Shin Takamatsu, 1997
by Mark Houlder
At this hour, Losel Yauch
1 week sober
Mind, body, and soul are fully healed (besides the fact that I’m coming off of a sinus infection lmao). If I play my cards right I’m winning trials in April. I’m still too insecure to say I’ll win the next ADCC but we’ll see. One step at a time. Systemize the ramen shop. Get an apartment. Training is going well now it’ll go even better. Win or lose after trials I’ll take time to visit my grandma for my birthday. If anything happens to her I’ll throw away my plans though. God forbid that happens but I have to prepared for any of life’s infamous curveballs. I’ll also need to have the discipline to not jump into another relationship. I think I’ll be good though I’ll get a cat or some shit at my absolute worst case scenario. But I think I’ll be okay. Ramen shop, optimize training, then move out. Win trials. Win ADCC. Keep everything else the same, probably start teaching a bit. Maybe go into MMA. If that happens I’ll have to keep that as training and I can focus more deeply on opening noodz locations. Retire Stan, Jun, and James. Give hella people jobs. Then I can retire at the cusp of 30 and I can train wherever I want whenever I want. Make sure Yaya and Titi’s health is in check and that they have anything they could ever need. Actually that’s higher priority than moving out. Systemize Noodz, optimize training, make sure Yaya and Titi are set. Then focus on winning trials. Even if I don’t make it this round next cycle will be 100% in the bag no challenge win trials and win ADCC gold. So I’m either ADCC champion at 27 or 29. As long as it’s before 30 that’ll be enough. Anything else will be icing on the cake. ADCC champion before 30 with my family taken care of and no wife / kids bismillah. Inshallah my plans will come to fruition. All glory to God we gon make it.
Lol what a naive boy I was only a couple years ago. Noodz flopped in a year. I shouldn’t have trusted their vision (or lack thereof) but you don’t know until you know, yknow? Life is good though. 28 now. East coast trials are coming up but I’m not sure that I can win. I just started getting back into my groove. I’m close to brown belt so I just want to wear it well. I feel like 21-25 was just a ton of jiu jitsu, learning to be domesticated, and a relationship. Since then it’s been such a whirlwind. I’ve learned and grown more in the last 2-3 years than my entire life I think. I feel like a man somewhat, not just a boy anymore. I miss Carl. I miss my grandfather. Now that I’m a bit older I think of things I would’ve liked to have ask him. There’s a potential romance in my life but it’s scary. It’s scary to feel so deeply. I’ll see how it goes. Well, I’ll see what I decide to do actually. I realize now how much control I really have over life, I wish I didn’t spend so long feeling helpless. It’s 3:17am im going to try to sleep a bit. I need to write my lesson plan for Gi class tomorrow.
if you see this
I hope you get everything you want in this life and for what it’s worth I just hope you’re happy

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Hanna Lee: darkness that embraces me (2023)
by enigmatriz

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Life felt better when you were in it
Antique Czech Glass Charms
(c. 1890s-1930s)